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jk biased ♡
187 posts
1-in-abillion - Tumblr Blog
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shushucherry ˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚
the curious lifespan of migrating monarchs - jjk
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THE CURIOUS LIFESPAN OF MIGRATING MONARCHS (& other aurelian affairs)
pairing: streamer!jk x international student!female oc (s2l)
warnings: strangers to lovers, clubbing, foul language, alcohol, vaping lol, jungkook is kinda famous, the oc is oblivious, the oc is also a foreign student who has very recently arrived in Korea!! (pls note - while i've been in korean uni dorms, i've never been in yonsei dorms specifically so don't shout at me if it isn't supeeeerr accurate), jaykay is speaking in eng for like 90% of this!!, i've also never watched a gaming streamer and had to do so for research lmao so there's a lot of guesswork going awwwn <3, the oc has tattoos, they bond over this, cute nicknames (tokki and nabi <3), one bed trope?? kinda, jaykay lives w/ yoongi and tae (they are streamers too (and dj?? (tae is a bit unhinged))), jungkook wears calvins!, a singular appearance of yoongi in his boxers!!, tipsy hookup, fingering, protected sex (woo!), desk sex, oral (m receiving), girliepop swallows <3, brief mentions of jungkook's starry eyes, lots of kisses, bunny ears, (1) mention of cross-fit
wordcount: 13011
note from holly: this was a commission done for the lovely Michelle over on my kofi page!! i don't open commissions often, but when I do I'm very lucky that the requests are so much fun. this actually ended up being way longer than it was supposed to be lol and is also available on wattpad!! also fun facts for you - I imagine the boys apartment (and jks room!) to be same as jk + jimins place in BD, just a little bigger lmao
minors dni // cross posted to wattpad
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CLUB SUNDOWN WAUSAN-RO, HONGDAE SATURDAY 02:24
Time ceases to exist after the sun goes down in Seoul. It could be two, or it could be five. The only thing that really clues you in on the actual time is the DJ schedule that lights up behind the decks: 02:00-03:00, Blu-Tae.
It's some guy you've never heard of. Looks no older than you. Probably a student, just like the rest of the crowd.
His hair is as blue as his namesake, which does make you smile, and his choices aren't bad either (even if somewhat questionable). You've never heard a jazz remix of Darude's Sandstorm before, and you doubt you ever will again.
Club Sundown is just as rogue as the rest of the city after the sun goes down. Hidden in the basement—like all the best places in Seoul are—the small room is packed to the absolute brim.
Who cares for views and sunsets offered by rooftop bars when you could lose yourself in the debauchery of an eternal midnight, instead?
Drinks are spilt on strangers, and dances have lost the grandeur of old-fashioned waltzes. It's not like you could dance properly, even if you wanted to. There's just simply no space.
Like Alice, you're down the rabbit hole—and oh, how you prefer it to being in the real world. In the shadows, you can be anyone you like.
If you were sober, you'd know this is also the case for daily life. You're in a new country with no ties to your former self. Who you are is who you choose to be.
But the shadows aren't all that dark. The red lights of the club bleed into the cracks, painting everyone in the same subtle hue of danger.
They shine a little light on the identifiers of you; the thin black lines of your patchwork tattoos. Trailing up your arm, they're memories of your past selves, and an indicator of who you hope to become.
"Down this," you say to your dormmate, Rae, handing back over the drink you've just ordered from the bar. "Cloakroom, then dance."
Still carrying your winter coats, you'd wanted to check the place out before committing to it. Entry is free, but the cloakroom is the same price as a drink. It would only be worth putting your coats away if you knew you wanted to stay—and given the fact the DJ was playing O-Zone's Dragostea Din Tei as you entered, you know it's a no-brainer. While his stage name might make you roll your eyes a little, Blu-Tae certainly does cater to your tastes. When you're drunk, and music vibrates through you, it's empyrean. No place you'd rather be.
"Oh, Jesus," Rae gags as she sips the drink you've just handed her. Despite her disgust, she's laughing. Head to toe in black, dark hair loose around her shoulders, she's been your ride-or-die since you arrived in Seoul. Both international students in the same dorm, there's no one you'd rather get up to no good with. "Vodka?!"
You beam at her like you're from the heavens above, wrongfully relegated to the depths of sin. Pretend like you love vodka. It's totally not like you panicked when you saw the menu was all in Korean.
Vodka-coke is a universally understood delicacy—the easiest thing for you to order without making a tit of yourself or butchering the pronunciation. When the bartender ignored your botched attempt at ordering in Korean and answered in fluent English, you'd wanted to melt into the floor. So embarrassing.
You're here, like most foreign students, for a language course. Semester is yet to start, and as much as you've studied and practised hard, it's always different when putting it into practice.
"I'm sorry," you laugh. "It's fine—you can order next time!"
But Rae has the exact same predicament as you. If anything, your language skills are better than hers, so you really have no hope. It's vodka-cokes for the evening, or maybe highballs. Once your tipsy brain manages to compute hangul cocktail names, you'll be golden, but that won't be for another few weeks, yet.
You'll look back at this time of your life fondly, realising how simple it all was, even if it feels incredibly overwhelming right now.
Funnily enough, hope is exactly what you have: for the semester ahead, for this new life you're forging, for the opportunities that may come your way.
In fact, by the time you're on your third vodka coke, you've managed to convince yourself you actually like it. You also can't taste it, thanks to the bartender freepouring a 60-40 ratio of vodka to coke in the first drink. Your tastebuds were wiped out pretty much instantly.
Coats in the cloakroom, you're glad to be wearing thin layers. The room is stuffy; your skin sweaty. While meeting new friends had been the goal, you keep to yourself. Dance like nobody is watching. Hold Rae's hands to stay close and ward off weirdos. Quickly realise that clubs back home are slightly different. Pay it no mind. Ignore the intrusions of hands on waists, because men, disappointingly, are no different.
Or at least most of them aren't.
But most of them don't look like the man in the corner booth, laughing with his friends.
Though he is tall, he's eclipsed by his demeanour. Shoulders broad, he's in a dark T-shirt and pair of jeans. Nothing special. Nothing that warrants such a perplexed stare from you - but he's familiar. You can't place him, but he's got the kind of face you swear you've seen before.
Rae doesn't notice the change in your poise, nor how you're desperately trying to work out where you know him from. Perhaps you've seen him around your university? It's only been a couple of weeks, but people are steadily moving in. Maybe he works at the convenience store you constantly find yourself in? Or mans the front desk of the noraebang you and Rae visit pretty much every other evening?
Impossible, you think. If you'd seen him before, you wouldn't have forgotten him, or the way he constantly toys with his lip rings. Plural. There are signs up around the place stating bar rules. NO SMOKING is rule number three. You've seen his friends pass him over a vape a handful of times. Anyone else, and you'd think it was cringe. Embarrassing.
But in the midst of his laughter settling, and a fresh toke being inhaled, his eyes flicker towards yours.
Perhaps it's just because you're drunk, but you don't avert your gaze. Show no shame. The smile on his lips sinks into a smirk as he exhales. An acknowledgement. A 'hello, trouble'.
Again, any other man, you'd find the vape smoke repugnant. Nasty. Now? Watching the way he flicks his tongue against his lip rings?
You wanna know how it tastes.
Black ink weaves an intricate outline of who he is up his arms. Where he's been. Who he's been. A map, if you will, of his soul.
Much like your own tattoos, he's got thick black lines, and little else. Simple, you assume. A man of convenience. Efficiency.
You wonder if he does everything in life with the precision to match his tattoos, and as your lips wrap around the straw of your vodka-coke, you decide you'd quite like to find out.
Interrupted by Rae pulling you deeper into the crowd, your night is spent in and out of shadows. Attempt subtlety. Try not to make your occasional glances to the corner booth noticeable, just checking if his eyes are still on you. More often than not, they aren't—but sometimes they are, and that's enough to fuel your little flirt.
It's not until the sign behind the DJ booth changes from 03:00-04:00, GLOSS into some other guy that you notice your staring contest opponent has slipped into the shadows himself. The booth is void of both him and his friends. Gone.
"GLOSS has a set at another club," Rae all but yells in your ear, and even then, you barely hear her. "All the hotties left when he did. Let's go."
"Where to?!" You laugh, empty cup in hand. Admittedly, the new guy who's stepped into the DJ booth is just not doing it for you. Blu-Tae was just the right amount of unhinged with classics, whereas GLOSS was definitely cooler, but still fun. Had the club yelling curse words over trap remixes just for the fun of it. This new guy, whose name you don't care to remember, takes himself too seriously, you think.
"It's, like, two blocks down," she yells back, tugging on your wrist to drag you to the stairwell that leads you back up to the streets of Seoul. The hustle and bustle of people trying to go in different directions in the tight place forces you apart, but you figure you'll catch up with her, or that she'll be waiting at the top.
You don't know the roads well enough yet to make it to whichever club it's at alone, and quickly realise when you nearly tumble into the side of a waiting taxi that you're far drunker than expected. Knew the bartender was freepouring, but didn't realise just how free those pours really were.
"Woah, easy trouble," a deep voice sounds from behind you as you're steadied to a more stable position.
"I'm good, I'm good!" You insist, shaking off the hands of your 'saviour'. Have no interest in being a damsel in distress, or some sober guy trying to take advantage of you.
Looking down to check your laces are tied properly, you check over your shoulder to make sure the guy isn't creepily waiting for a thank you that he can turn into an intrusive game of 21 questions—'are you open-minded?' or 'do you live alone?'—but when you glance in his direction, you regret it. Notice the tattoos immediately. Recognise the eyes. Want to die.
"Oh."
"Oh," he says back with a smile, imitating you. Suddenly, the confidence you'd had earlier when looking at him from afar dissolves into nothingness, just like the alcohol in your bloodstream. You feel rather sober, but your body would definitely disagree. "You okay?"
"Yeah, yeah," you nod, suddenly a little stuck for words, desperately trying to play things cool. "Are you okay?"
The pouting of his lips as his tongue runs along the inside of his cheek only serves to make you internally cringe. Men who look like him have no business being on streets like this. Should be in a museum. Strung up on the walls with the other masterpieces. Admired by everyone who looks his way.
In a way you don't yet realise, he is.
Though he's not in galleries, he's often burning into people's laptop screens. Is the background of a fair few thousand lock screens. Indeed, he is admired by everyone who looks his way, just not in the traditional sense.
"I'm not the one who just fell into a car," he reminds you, as if you could forget your embarrassment so quickly.
"Was just seeing if you'd catch me," you bullshit, the confidence you usually have returning tenfold. Was just a momentary blip. He's just a man, after all.
"Oh?" He chirps, decidedly curious. "So you fell for me?"
"Stumbled."
"Semantics."
His fluency, and the fact he just said 'semantics' so casually in conversation, clues you in on the fact he might be a language student, too.
Could be useful study partners for each other, you think, then mentally berate yourself for already masterminding ways to see him again.
"So, where you going?" He asks, not caring to downplay his curiosity. The bartenders were free-pouring his drinks just as severely as they poured yours. The only difference is that his were on the house—'cause you were right. He does have a recognisable face. "Should probably go with you. Make sure you don't fall into the road."
"Stumble," you insist, a little pleased with the boldness of his suggestion, but not wanting to blindly agree. "My friend," you say glancing around, only to find yourself completely alone. "She wanted to go catch the next GLOSS set. So, I guess that's where we're going."
"Just down the road," he says, knowing the schedule like the back of his hand. Bounces from club to club supporting his friends, just like they would for him. If he wanted, he could get a slot up there, too. He doesn't care for it. "I'll walk with you, if you want? My friends are heading there anyway."
It's not a bad offer.
In fact, it's probably the best offer you'll get all night.
"C'mon," he nods his head to the side, encouraging you to follow him. Checks his phone for the time. "Starts in five."
If there's one thing you've indulged in since moving to Seoul, it's how safe you always feel. Security cameras are on every corner, and you've walked home countless times without any issues, even late into the night. While the place isn't perfect, it's far safer than your home country.
Still, you're not a complete idiot.
"It's not wise to follow strange men down dark alleys," you tell him.
He holds out his hand. Waits for you to shake it. Cocks a brow when you hesitate, so introduces himself.
"Jungkook. Nice to meet you. Now, can we please hurry up? I promised I'd be there."
Narrowing your eyes, you don't shake his hand. Arms folded over your chest, there is ice to your exterior, and given how warm his eyes are, you doubt it'll last for very long. May as well keep up this hard-to-get act while you still can.
Walking on past him, you call back, "Alright then. Lead the way."
In the domed mirror meant for reversing cars at the end of a tight alley, you see him laugh. "Wrong way, idiot."
Pausing, you scrunch your face up. Don't turn to face him for at least a second or so—but when you do, you're surprised to see him walking towards you. Hooking his arm around your waist, he carries on walking in the 'wrong' direction, taking you with him.
"Was just fucking with you," he grins. Nods towards a sign by another basement entrance, listing both Blu-Tae and GLOSS.
By the door, Rae is looking around like a mother duck who's just lost some of her ducklings when crossing the road. Breathes a sigh of relief when she spots you.
"C'mon," she grins, then realises who you're with. Says nothing of it, 'cause she doesn't want to be weird, but she recognises him, too. Decides she's just had a little too much to drink. There's no way it's him. Holds out her hand for you.
Reaching out for her, you're let go from Jungkook's grip, ready to get lost in the lights once more.
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HAEJANG24 WAUSAN-RO, HONGDAE SATURDAY 05:53
Seoul is a city for the nocturnal. The restaurants and bars are open until the last men are standing. Given how much you've had to drink, you're surprised you still are.
Rae had dipped an hour or so ago. Had hit it off with Mr Blu-Tae himself. Seduced him with the suggestion that their couple name would be Blu-Rae. He'd said they should go to a DVD-bang. Would be fitting. See what Blu-rays were on file.
Naturally, you'd looked on with mild disgust and also admiration for how quickly she'd worked her magic. Everyone knows what goes down in DVD-bangs. Small private rooms, often with projector screens and the world's least comfortable futons, they're somewhere you hope to never end up—but also can't wait to hear all the details the next morning when Rae comes to your room for a debrief.
You'd been left under the surveillance of Jungkook.
"Look after her," Rae had instructed, then narrowed her eyes. "Or I'll destroy your reputation with a single twitter thread, Tokki."
It's a threat he's taken seriously. Knows how the internet works, and even though he's never done anything worthy of a cancellation, he also doesn't intend on starting now. The fact you seem to have no idea who he is during the daylight hours intrigues him. It's a rarity on streets like these.
Even when a few people asked for pictures with him on your walk to the hangover soup place, you didn't clock it as weird. Figured they were friends passing by, wanting to document their chance run-in. Just another memory of the night. The way Jungkook had greeted them was full of warmth, and kindness. Why wouldn't you assume they were mates?
You were also still incredibly drunk at the time, so didn't think to question it. Was keen for food, and Jungkook had insisted on hangover soup, and so that's where you are. Dishes nearly empty, far more of it eaten by him than you, you're laughing about nothing and everything all at once.
"Right," Jungkook declares, deciding he cannot hold in a question that's been tickling at his brain for the entire meal. "What the fuck is that?"
Coat left in the cloakroom, long forgotten about, your tattoos are on full display for him, just like his are for you. Up your arm they trail; a patchwork of teeny tiny identifiers. Latin phrases around skulls, birth flowers of the people you hold close, butterflies and stars. There's an ode to your favourite musician and your favourite Shakespeare quote, too. The fabric of you etched into your skin. There's no reinventing yourself, even half the world away from home.
You know precisely which tattoo Jungkook is asking about. You've asked yourself the same question a few times.
"Fuck off," you laugh.
While most of your tattoos are gorgeous, there's one that was done by a rogue artist on a girlie holiday a few years ago. What was supposed to be a seashell now looks like... well, nothing really. It's just a blob, thanks to the artist being absolutely terrible. The only solace you find in it is that your two best friends have an equally awful permanent reminder of that holiday on their bodies, too.
"It doesn't look how it's supposed to," you explain with a little pout. "I got royally screwed over."
He cocks a brow. You still haven't told him what it is. He isn't gonna ask you twice.
With a grumble, you feebly admit, "A shell."
And then he's laughing. Really laughing. Laughing so hard you think he might piss himself—which you'd actually prefer, because then he could be the embarrassed one, instead.
"I'm calling you Shelly from now on," he says with a broad smile. Has had his fair share of tattoo blunders, and knows you must've developed an affection towards how shitty it is. Would have gotten it covered up, otherwise. "That's incredible."
"You're calling me so such thing," you assure him, but you also can't help but laugh.
"I am," he tells you, then really solidifies it. "Shelly."
"Fuck off," you whine, doubling down. Scanning his arms, you try and pick out anything you can use against him, too. "If I'm Shelly, then you're Mike."
"Mike?!" He protests.
"Yeah," you insist, pointing towards the microphone on his forearm. "Mike."
"You are not calling me Mike. Do I look like a Mike?!"
"Do I look like a Shelly?!"
You've got a point. It's not the name he would have first associated with you - but it is cute, he thinks. Cute how mortified you seem. Cute how you can't help but smile.
After a little bit of back and forth, it's decided that neither of you look like your namesakes.
"Y'know, we kinda have matching tattoos," he says, holding out his arm for you to study. "Or at least, the placements."
And sure enough, below his elbow lives the outline of a bunny sitting on a crescent moon. Holding your own arm out next to his, below your elbow is a butterfly. Above it, is a teeny tiny moon.
Like Jungkook's moon, it's a crescent. Was supposed to symbolise new beginnings. You wonder what his means, but don't ask. Instead, you marvel at the coincidence of it all.
He presses his index finger against the butterfly on the inside of your forearm. The echoing chatter of the restaurant fades softly into nothingness as he says, "Nabi."
You nod. Even if you have spoken with him in English this entire time, it's nice to hear him speak in his mother tongue, no matter how minimal - so you reciprocate. Press your index finger against his bunny. Smile. Say, "Tokki."
It further confirms to Jungkook that you have no idea who he is. Has been a while since he's met a girl in a circumstance like this where that's the case. Likes the anonymity of it all. Is hiding his identity from you, and yet hasn't felt such vulnerability for years.
"Daltokki, right?" You continue, not wanting the silence to linger for too long. "The rabbit in the moon?"
You're not wrong, but you're also not entirely right.
"Yeah," he smiles regardless. "That's it."
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JUNGKOOK'S APARTMENT ITAEWON-DONG, YONGSAN-GU SATURDAY 07:12
"Shhh," Jungkook quietly laughs.
His hand is over your mouth and the other is on your hip as he guides you into his apartment. With your back to his chest, you've both been giggling for the entire ride to his place.
He had insisted that he should walk you home, and was surprised by the offense you seemed to have taken by this. You then told him that he absolutely could not seduce you, and that it was very gender-role-conforming for him to think that you were incapable of getting home by yourself.
"Maybe I should be the one to make sure you get home safely," you had said with a false sense of concern, which had made him laugh quite considerably.
In all reality, you didn't mind him offering to get you home. You just hadn't tidied your room. Didn't really expect to be taking a boy back to your place, much less one that looks like him.
Together, you'd caught the early morning bus over to Itaewon instead of a taxi, 'cause you're still on a student budget and Jungkook wasn't quite ready to blow his cover just yet.
You've been teasing him—questioning his status as a potential International Super Spy—ever since he took your hand and guided you into one of the flashiest apartment complexes you've ever been in. There was security. Doormen. A passcode for the elevator—not to mention that he was heading up to the seventh floor once you were in it. Might not sound like much, but when there are only seven floors to the entire building, it makes it the penthouse by default.
"It's not a penthouse," he'd insisted. "Plus, I live with friends. Only pay a third of the rent."
But a third of his rent is more money than you'll probably see in three months of post-grad work. You're drunk, but you're not stupid. You also know that the rental market here differs significantly from your home country. Monthly rent is cheap, but the deposits are extortionate. Sure, he'll get it back when he leaves, but to have the initial money needed for a place like this? He's not a regular student, if one at all, that much is sure.
"Not sure who's home," Jungkook whispers as you both kick your shoes off in the entryway. Given the looks of the other shoes, it's clear that this is a guys-only living situation. You're proven right when he continues, "Betcha Tae's still in that damn DVD-bang, but Yoongi might be back."
"Yoongi?" You question.
"GLOSS," Jungkook says, remembering how oblivious you are to who he is. Reaching down to grab your shoes, he isn't gonna leave them by the door. Will take them to his room. Doesn't want the boys asking questions, if they are in. Knows they'll just use it as an excuse to publicly roast him whenever they're next online together.
Given that a stream is scheduled for Sunday night, he doesn't want to tempt fate.
Their current choice of wind-up, which the viewers have been eating up, is the joke that Jungkook is a virgin. He's not, but he never knows how to defend himself without sounding like a tool, so always gets a little awkward. A lot of their viewers love it. Join in on the joke. Some take it seriously. He doesn't care.
Next month, Taehyung will do something dumb, and he'll become the favourite joke for a while. Maybe Yoongi. But for now, it's Jungkook.
None of them take it to heart. They're just a group of friends who share their gaming hangouts online, and accidentally made it to the top of the ranks.
They aren't particularly good at gaming, but that's part of the charm. Crescent Collective is how they're known: Blu-Tae, GLOSS and Tokki.
After a bet went wrong, and they all lost, they ended up with moon tattoos and their respective 'symbols'. Jungkook's is a rabbit, Tae's is a blu-ray DVD disk (because he really is committed to the bit), and Yoongi's is stars to symbolise the shine of fresh gloss. Jungkook's makes the most sense. Yoongi's is pretty decent. Taehyung's is just... Well, it's very him.
Sliding open the door into the main living area, Jungkook has to cover your mouth again when you gasp at the sheer size of the place.
"I thought butterflies were supposed to be silent?" He teases. "Quiet for me, Nabi."
His place is bigger than your family home, you think. Hushing you again, he's laughing—and then he's cursing at the sight of a half-naked Yoongi by the kitchen counter.
In his boxers, with half a clementine slice hanging from his lips, he's just as shocked to see Jungkook with you. Gets over it pretty quickly.
"Don't mind me," he says, chewing down on the fruit with a smirk. Looks towards you. "Apologies for the lack of clothes."
With your shoes hooked on his fingers, Jungkook's other large hand is still over your mouth. You're not sure you can form any words as it is, but you do notice the crescent moon and stars on Yoongi's ribs.
"Not a word to Tae," is all Jungkook says. Knows that he'll be in for a world of teasing tomorrow if he gets wind of it. "I mean it."
Holding his hands up, Yoongi's still smirking, but he is backing away into a room just off the kitchen. "My lips are sealed."
Watching as he closes the door, you wonder how much truth is in his words. Jungkook knows it's absolute bullshit. Chooses not to dwell on it. Loosens his grip on you and heads towards his own room. Turns back to check you're following him, and can't help but smile when he knows that you are.
Tossing your shoes just inside the door, Jungkook is quick to pick up a pair of jeans he'd left on the floor, before chucking them over his desk chair. He tweaks his bedding. Straightens it out. Looks a little shy as he turns to face you.
"Made it home safe," he says quietly, as you close the door behind you.
You nod. Keep a little distance. Say, "It's dangerous to sleep after drinking. Make sure you build a tower of pillows in the middle of your bed so you don't roll onto your back."
Both of you are far more sober than you were earlier. There's no need to worry about anything like that.
And yet he nods, now. Says, "You're probably right. You can always stay, though. Just to check I don't die in my sleep, or whatever."
"It'd be the responsible thing to do," you nod, wondering if he can tell just how fast your heart is beating. "But I don't have any pyjamas."
Jungkook swallows. The way he looks at you now is entirely different to how he'd looked at you in the club. Back then, he'd been bold. Flirtatious.
Now, he seems vulnerable. Needy.
"I sleep in my underwear," he tells you, unsure if you'll actually be sleeping. While he likes the idea of fucking you, part of him doesn't want to. Fears it'll ruin the magic of the unknown. The way he throbs at the mere thought of it would suggest that his hopes outweigh his fears. "I don't mind, if you don't."
The clothes Jungkook's wearing are baggy. You've seen nothing of his figure.
Reaching for the nape of his neck, he tugs on the fabric of his T-shirt. Pulls it over his head and discards it in one swift movement. The sound of it crumpling on the floor is abrasive in how it makes you feel. Raw. Unrefined. You suppose it's just a natural consequence of seeing the toned muscles of his chest. How his waist defies what you thought was possible for masculine builds, and how broad his chest is. The indent of his collarbones, and the lines of his pelvis that draw your eyes downwards.
A pair of Calvins peek just above the waistband of his jeans, and a silver chain rests around his neck. Light from the city filters in, and LED lights around his impressive computer set-up paint him in a hue of violet.
"No," you manage to reply, which is a miracle, you think. "I don't mind."
And then you reciprocate. Reach for the hem of your shirt and pull it over your head, letting the fabric fall to the floor. Seeing him swallow back his nerves, or maybe his desires, makes you feel far bolder than you should.
"It's really uncomfortable to sleep in jeans," you tell him.
He nods. Agrees. Threads the button of his trousers through its loop. Doesn't take them off yet. Waits for you to do the same. Keeps his eyes firmly locked on yours. Doesn't let his gaze wander, no matter how much he has to fight all his instincts not to fully take you in. Is still pretending like he doesn't want you in the most indecent of ways.
The room you're in right now is known worldwide.
People set it as their zoom backgrounds. It's on Pinterest. There are YouTube videos attempting to recreate the set-up. If he were to power up his computer—which, in all fairness, is only on standby—and go live, there'd be a thousand viewers within minutes. Doesn't matter what he plays, or who he's with. He doesn't give it much thought anymore. Is just life.
Sometimes, he regrets not being a faceless streamer, but he also knows that it's part of the appeal. Connection, and the fantasy that comes with this almost dystopian, parasocial idea of it.
After all, the meeting of his eyes with yours across a busy club led you to this point. Human connection in the simplest of ways, that he thinks could culminate in the most complex of ways, too.
"Okay," he says. "So take them off."
"You want me to?" You ask just to tease a little bit, and when a smile flickers onto his seemingly nervous lips, you're glad you did.
"You think we'd be here right now if I didn't?" He says with a tweak of his brows.
"You've got a point."
With that, you push your jeans down and reveal the matching set of black underwear you're in. It's nothing special. In fact, it's not really a set, but it's close enough that it'd fool anyone who didn't know.
Jungkook, in this moment, is indeed a beautiful fool.
There's a lopsided grin on his face as he lets his eyes rake down your body. Is shameless as he indulges in you. Nods, as he bites down on his bottom lip.
"It's cold," you tell him, urging him along a little bit.
"Shit," he says without much thought. "Sorry. Was just... Yeah. Shit."
It's both endearing and wholly confusing how Jungkook flips from confident to cute. A man of duality. It makes you giggle, and then you're the one biting down on your bottom lip. Are both a little bashful. A little shy.
"I'm only here to make sure you don't die in your sleep," you remind him before it goes any further.
Looking at him now, knowing you want him in the worst of ways, it's testing all of your willpower not to just cut to the chase.
Thing is, you liked his company tonight. Want it again. Want to give him a reason to seek you out once more. Want him thinking about you in clubs, and looking for you in crowded bars. Pining. Yearning. Needy.
"It's already gone seven," he tells you, walking towards his bed. Knocks his head to the side. Silently tells you to follow suit. "Will probably only get a couple hours in."
"Better than nothing. Plus, you're actually really irritating," you bullshit as you get into bed with him. Are adamant you won't fuck him, but you do let him pull you in closer.
"Oh, yeah?" He grins.
"Mhmm," you nod, pretending as if you aren't looking at his lips. "You'll be less annoying when you're asleep."
"I'm never gonna sleep again," he assures you. "Will annoy you forever."
"I know where the front door is," you say as you stroke a few of his loose, wavy hairs back behind his ears. They fall freely almost right away, but it just gives you another excuse to play with it "I can just leave. I'm only here to make sure you don't die in your sleep. Pointless if you're awake."
"So I have to be asleep for you to stay?"
"Mhmm," you hum.
He immediately loosens his grip on you and flops into an overdramatic sleeping position. Fake snores. Gets you giggling. Can't hide his smile, either. Laughs through the god-awful noises he's making.
But it is late, and you're both tired. As much as he'd like to stay awake with you, the pull of sleep is just too tempting now that you're beneath his sheets. It's not like he doesn't wanna fuck you. His semi is very much present, but neither of you mention it.
"Y'know what's sad about butterflies?" Jungkook mumbles after the laughter dies down. He carefully begins to trace the lines of your tattoo, eyes entirely focused on the tip of his finger.
You purr a response before you fully vocalise one. "Tell me."
He glances up at you only very momentarily. Looks back down. Is quiet when he says, "How quickly they die. Spend over half their lifespan growing into these beautiful creatures, and then they have, what—A week? Two? Three, tops—and then they're gone. It's like the cherry blossoms in spring. Beautiful, and then—" He clicks his fingers. "—gone."
Stroking back some loose strands of his hair, you wonder if he's thinking about you. About this chance encounter. Beautiful, then gone.
"Just means you have to appreciate them while they're still around," you say softly. "Cherish them, because you know you only have them for a moment."
His gaze lifts to meet yours. The reflection of his LED lights makes it seem like butterflies are floating around in his deep, dark eyes, too.
There are stories he could tell you of ancient folklore; about human souls taking the form of butterflies. Of justice, and peace, and spirits. Of back in time, when tigers still smoked. He could tell you of his favourite butterflies. Of the black butterflies that are as large as his hands in the summer. Of the huge display in a museum downtown that would transfix him as a child.
Instead, he gently presses his lips against the lines of your butterfly tattoo.
The rate at which your heart is beating multiplies. Like a swarm of butterflies chasing through your veins, you've no control over the way you're feeling. He's brought your artwork to life; set the souls inside of your butterfly free, only for it to be apparent that the souls belonged to the both of you, anyway.
You know that this is one of those moments; a butterfly passing on by through your lives. Here, and then gone. Beautiful, but fleeting.
There's a shyness to Jungkook now, as he rolls onto his back. A reluctance to get things wrong. He doesn't look at you, just nibbles on his bottom lip and pretends as if the empty white ceiling ahead of him is the most interesting thing he's seen all night.
It's not.
You are.
You, and those eyes that make him feel like the butterfly on your arm is tickling at his tummy. He finds himself jealous when he faces you again and begins tracing the thin lines of your butterfly once more. Wants to embed himself into you like the ink that's carved out a home in your skin.
"Sorry," he mumbles, seemingly regretful of the tender kiss he'd pressed against your arm just a short moment ago. "Don't know why I did that."
"It's okay," you reply without much thought. Like him, you're letting the way you feel dictate the words you say. Care not for playing coy. "I liked it."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
Jungkook wants to stop his mouth from letting his desires escape. The issue is, he drank a little too much tonight and his lips are a little too loose. Too bad. Can't help himself from asking, "Can I do it again?"
You're just as bad.
"Yeah," you whisper. "Please."
The way his lashes splay against his cheeks as he presses another kiss to your arm is nothing short of celestial. Like that damn moon on his arm, he's got a beauty about him that's hard to capture in words. Ethereal feels too fantastical, but gorgeous feels too dense. He resides in a realm somewhere between the two. Somewhere you'd like to stay forever.
Forever, sadly, only lasts a few hours. You've brunch plans with new friends you can't bail on yet for fear of running a friendship before it's even begun.
You see yourself out. Jungkook's still asleep. Not quite 10AM, you've a dozen missed calls from Rae, and a cold can of coke waiting for you in your fridge. Funnily enough, though, you don't really feel hungover. Must have gotten it all out of your system the night before.
It's only fitting, when you think about Jungkook on the subway home, and how soberingly drunk the idea of him makes you feel.
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YONSEI UNIVERSITY DORMS DAESIN-DONG, SEODAEMUN-GU SUNDAY 21:39
Brunch had, predictably, been a yawn-fest.
The people were perfectly nice, but you spent the entire time thinking about Jungkook; how you'd left him in a pretty slumber, the LEDs behind his computer still glowing, with not even so much as a note to say thank you.
It's not like he had any paper on his desk, and you weren't about to start rummaging around his room. You also didn't want to wake him. Part of it was because you knew you'd be saying goodbye, and the concept of that was one that you didn't like all that much.
And so your subway ride back to your dorm had been spent searching his name. He didn't take long to find.
From the club's Instagram, you found GLOSS and quickly discovered that there was far more to both him and Blu-Tae than just being DJs. Their follower counts were wild. Numbers you know you'll never see on your own account. Verification check marks accented their display names.
Who are you? You'd thought to yourself, incredibly perplexed by it all.
Jungkook was littered all over their pages, and yet it still took a while for you to click through to his account. You're not sure why, but think that perhaps the unknown was a nice place to reside within. Safer.
CR3SC3NT_T0KK1 was his username—and curiously, Tokki was also his display name. Brows furrowed, you'd almost dropped your phone when you saw his follower count. It eclipsed both of his friends.
Filled with gaming set-ups, merch drops, and general life dumps, it was pretty clear that whoever Jungkook had made himself out to be the night before was not who he was in real life.
Equal parts offended and intrigued, you were only more confused when you saw that Rae was already following him—but not following Taehyung.
"What?" she'd beamed when you'd asked her about it after you'd arrived home from brunch, a scoop of hangover ice cream being waved around in the air with her flamboyant gestures. "He's, like, one of the biggest streamers in the country—and if I want to keep Tae obsessed with me, we need as many connections as possible. Jungkook's a frog to me, baby, not a prince. Don't you worry your little cotton socks. I'm not after him."
"I wouldn't care if you were," you'd blatantly lied in response, and then you'd giggled together at how ridiculous you were both being over boys you didn't really know.
Hovering over the bright purple 'JOIN STREAM' button later that evening, part of you holds back. Think it'd be weird. Strange. That he'd somehow know it was you.
Dipping your mouse, you tick the checkbox to join as an anonymous viewer. Take a breath. Think fuck it. Watch with bated breath as the loading wheel turns—and then he's there.
Jeon Jungkook has the kind of beauty that transcends shitty quality streams. Smiling as he jokes with one of his friends through a headset with a pair of black bunny ears affixed to the top of them, you hear a voice you almost recognise. Notice the friend he's streaming with in the top corner. Realise you do know him, too.
Hair as blue as the trees are green, Tae has just as much boyish charm as Jungkook, but also an incredibly large hickey that seems to match the ones on Rae's neck.
"Nah, can we get an L in the chat for Kook," he's teasing. Sure enough, the chat begins to explode with the letter, and Jungkook looks so pretty when he protests.
"It's not an L!"
"It is!" Tae insists. "Should have seen him, guys. Was following this girl around like a lovesick puppy—"
"No, I wasn't!"
"And she didn't even give him her number. Not even her name!"
"That's not true!" Jungkook whines. He switches between Korean and English with ease, sometimes just single words, other times whole sentences. "I have a name."
"What is it?"
"Not telling you."
"Cause you don't have one!"
"No, because you'll all make my life a living hell," Jungkook laughs—and then notices a bright blue comment lighting up in the chat. His eyes widen. "Fuck."
GLOSS: Was calling her Nabi when he got home last night Almost shit his pants when he saw me
"Yoongi, I'm gonna shave your eyebrows off in your sleep," Jungkook growls—only for the chat to start spamming butterfly emojis. Closing his eyes, he leans back in his chair, the still paused video game long forgotten about, now. Thousands of people are in their chat, and even more are watching the stream.
"Guys, get it trending," Taehyung goads. "Tweet, I dunno, bunny and butterfly emojis."
"Don't do that!"
"Hashtag find Jungkook's butterfly."
"Do NOT do that!"
"I'm like a modern-day cupid," Taehyung beams.
"I'm shaving your eyebrows, too."
Closing the stream, you sit for a moment, mouth ajar, unable to process what on earth you've just witnessed. Part of you feels as if it must have an incredibly vivid daydream; a projection of your heart's desire.
And you know you shouldn't, but when you get home from running errands the following day, you join the stream again. Blush when you notice the chat is still teasing Jungkook.
"I'm gonna block you all," he threatens them with a grin, which only encourages them to send even more butterfly emojis.
The next day is no different, nor the day after that.
He is, though. Has been letting it all play on his mind. Doesn't have much of a filter when it comes to streaming.
"What if she didn't even like me, guys," he whines to the chat. "And sees this and is like... mortified. I think I'd punch myself in the face if she ever saw any of this."
You toy with the idea of sending a comment into the chat. Something that only he'd realise was you. Thing is, you feel bad for intruding. As if you shouldn't be prying. As if you're eavesdropping on him chatting with friends, and not on the stream he's broadcasting live around the world.
Typing out a message, you deliberate your choice.
Punch urself in the face pls, tokki x the message reads.
Simple. Effective. To the point.
But everyone calls him that, you stupidly realise, now.
And so you change the name to 'Mike'.
Before you can even really realise what you've done, you've pressed send.
The message flitters into the chat feed. He's about to resume his game. Doesn't notice it at first.
Gives the chat one final glance, and then his eyes widen. He sits up taller. Straighter. "Mike?"
You close the lid of your laptop immediately.
"Fuck."
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THE STREETS WAUSAN-RO, HONGDAE FRIDAY 23:51
"Tae is on in five," Rae squeals, dragging you down the road at lightning speed.
You'd spent far too long at dinner, and also had far too much to drink with your food, so have been forced to make an undignified sprint to the club in an attempt to make it in before the place reaches capacity.
There's already a queue. You can see it from a mile away.
Realistically, Rae could have gotten Taehyung to add her to the guest list. He'd offered. She didn't wanna look needy, so had played it coy about her plans for the evening.
After a single beer and soju, she'd decided that the idea of him hooking up with anyone but her simply wouldn't do.
"Shit," she sighs in defeat, looking at the queue. The direction you've come from means that you reach the entrance before you reach the queue, but even then, you can tell it goes around the block. "Are there no other clubs these people can go to?!"
There are—but this club is rammed tonight for the same reason Club Sundown was rammed the week before. People want to see the Crescent Collective.
You didn't realise it at the time, but you'd bypassed the queue of the second club last weekend because Jungkook had been with you.
And as if by a stroke of luck, or perhaps a twist of fate, the same tattooed hand that had held you as you slept last weekend is now putting out a cigarette just a few steps away.
Eyes landing on yours, he looks away again, almost immediately. Feels embarrassed. Stupid. For the way you left him, and also for the way he knows you must know who he is, now.
Behind a red rope, he's away from the general crowd. It's sort of obnoxious, you think—but also know Jungkook is anything but.
"They're with me," Jungkook says to the bouncer, not really looking at you, but nodding in your general direction. Is deliberately keeping a little distance. Instead, he says to Rae, "Tae wouldn't want you waiting in line."
Nodding, the security guard makes way for you, stamping the backs of your hands with UV-activated ink as you walk past.
"Thank you!" Rae beams.
"No worries," Jungkook smiles right back. "He's about to start. Was just getting air. You're lucky you arrived when you did."
"Angel," she praises. "I'll get you a drink while we're in there."
You know her well enough now to know that she absolutely will not, but you don't say anything. Instead, you fold your arms over your chest as you walk, suddenly feeling all awkward in Jungkook's presence.
"Nabi," he curtly greets you as you head down the stairs.
"Tokki," you greet him back just as formally. Consider calling him 'Mike' instead, but you chicken out.
Face scrunching up, Jungkook tries his best not to cringe at himself. Doesn't know if you're addressing him by his tattoo moniker, or just calling him Tokki because you know it's his identifier online.
"How have you been?" He asks, not wanting to let it simmer.
"Alright," you say, aware of how awkward this all feels, as you descend the stairs and into the club. The music is getting louder, and soon you won't be able to hear him talk unless you're in each other's ears. "And you?"
"Alright."
Just as quickly as he appeared, Jungkook is lost to the crowd.
He doesn't care to stick around if he's just going to be hung out to dry by you again. He tells himself that he only made sure you got in to keep Rae happy for Taehyung's sake—yet as he rejoins his friends in their booth, he finds himself desperately seeking you out again.
It takes him a while, but he eventually spots you by the bar in conversation with Rae. He can't make out what you're saying, but notices how your eyes are flickering around the room. Seems as if you're hunting for something.
Deep down, even if he pretends like he doesn't, he hopes it's for him.
Pulled away from your search by the bartender passing over drinks to the pair of you, Jungkook feels bad. Knows the drinks are pricey in this place. Also knows, from the conversations you've already had, that you're on a tight budget. Had said that once the semester starts, you'll stop going to parties. Are seemingly unaware of the fact the parties never stop in this city. You'll learn.
When your eyes finally land on his a little while later, you're surprised by his intense gaze—intrigued by his lack of shame for being caught out. He doesn't look away or appear embarrassed. If anything, it's quite the opposite.
Girls are vying for his attention all around him, yet you receive all of it. Half the room away, hundreds of people create a sea between you both. Jungkook thinks he'd swim through it, no matter how choppy the water, if it meant he could have you right now.
You're the one who left, though.
It's up to you to come back.
Part of you doesn't want to, but then you see another girl making advances, and Rae's horror over other girls trying it on with Taehyung seems to have rubbed off on you. The idea of it makes your skin crawl. You're drunk, and a little reactive, but Jungkook likes playing with fire.
As you work your way through the crowd towards him, he tries his best not to grin. Finds himself vindicated in his desire to be close to you, 'cause it seems like you want it, too.
Sliding in between Jungkook and the girl, you turn and apologise.
"Just need to borrow him for a second," you smile, clutching at his shirt and pulling him away from the booth before she even has a chance to protest.
With an ever-so-satisfied smirk, Jungkook shrugs towards the other girl, and lets you drag him wherever you want. He's putty in your hands, a little tipsy and desperately in need of attention from you.
For the past week, he's played scenario over scenario over scenario in his head about this moment, and now that it's happening, he's glad he let you seek him out. Is so pleased that you actively want him just as much as he wants you.
In the middle of the crowd, you're hidden from prying eyes. It's too dark to notice any discerning features of the people around you, yet somehow, Jungkook seems like a vibrant golden light to you. Impossible to miss. Unable to ignore.
You wanna talk. Ask him about who the fuck he is. Explain that you didn't mean to leave so heartlessly.
Taehyung's set is so overwhelmingly loud, though. Can barely even hear yourself think.
As soon as he'd spotted Rae in the crowd, Taehyung had sent the bar coordinator to go and get her. She's sitting pretty up in the DJ booth, incredibly pleased with herself. Notices you and Jungkook almost immediately. Knows it'll be on Twitter in the next few hours, especially if that damn butterfly tattoo of yours is noticed.
Bunnies and butterflies have been trending for days.
Jungkook speaks, but you can't hear him.
"Huh?" You ask, getting on your tippy toes, but it's fruitless. Even as his hand drops to your waist to steady you and keep you in place, you can barely make out his words. "I can't hear you!"
He can't hear jack shit, either. Frowns. Looks around. Spots Yoongi by the booth and gestures towards the side of the room. When Yoongi nods back, it's Jungkook who drags you through the crowd, now. Just beyond the DJ booth is a little black door that Yoongi meets you by. Taps in the code. Nods in your direction.
"A pleasure," he says with a knowing smirk. Miraculously, you can hear him, but ultimately, it's because you're not in the direct line of the speakers now.
You don't get a chance to respond before Jungkook gets you into what can only described as a dark hole as quickly as he can. Romance, you think to yourself, but you also are very aware of the fact Jungkook doesn't let go of your hand, even when he's searching for the light switch. It takes him a second, but he manages to recall the approximate location quickly enough.
Dingy yellow light floods into the room. Small and boxy, it's a 3-in-1 storage room, bathroom, and dressing room for 'talent'. It's why Yoongi had the code, but you can't imagine anyone with any shred of self-respect actually using this place. The walls are the same grey tiles as the floor, and the light bulb hangs from a wire without a shade. The tap on the sink drips, and you're pretty sure there's a leak in the far corner by the mirror.
None of that matters, though. All you can focus on is the man in front of you. Though not soundproof, the room does offer a far more muted version of Taehyung's set. More importantly, it provides you with privacy.
It's been a week since you last saw him, face to face.
Though you have, admittedly, seen him what feels like a million times on low-quality streams from his bedroom.
Realistically, it's been about three times, but you think about it almost constantly.
"You left," is all he says, a little pout on his lips.
It's cute, you think, that he is so outwardly offended by such an act. You would have thought that a man of his position would have a habit of leaving, himself. Then again, you didn't know of his status when you left him in bed that morning.
"And you didn't die," you reply with a teasing smile, trying not to make it sound so severe. "You were fine without me."
"I'm not joking," he says, even if he can't help but smile at the recollection of how stupid the conversation before bed had been. "You left. It was rude."
"I had brunch plans," you tell him, reaching your hands out for his. He wants to resist. Fails. Lets you pull him closer. Incredibly close, in fact. So close that you begin to notice all sorts of things. His freckles. A small scar on his cheek. A tiny fleck of glitter on his skin, no doubt from one of the girls who had been desperate for his attention earlier. "You'd only had a few hours sleep. I didn't want to disturb you."
"Could have left a note," he says, still pouty but far quieter. You can smell the Jack on his breath. Have always hated the taste, but think you could grow to like it. "Your number. Something, at least."
"I could've," you admit, edging even closer. Closing the gap. Nudging your nose against his. But then you smile. Pull back. Tease, "And you could have warned me that I'd become a trending topic on Twitter."
Just like that, Jungkook's pout snaps into the prettiest smile. His face scrunches up, lines creasing on his nose. Beneath his closed eyes reside the sweetest little puffs. He's got the kind of face that is impossible not to like.
"Ah," he cringes.
"Yeah," you laugh at the stupidity of it all. What did he expect? That you wouldn't find out? "Ah."
"In my defence," he holds his hands up, eyes wide and innocent. "You called me Tokki. How was I to know you didn't know?"
"Oh, give over," you laugh, as he reaches for your hands once again. Pulls you closer. "You know I didn't know."
Truthfully, he does know this, but it was nice to be unknown for a little while. Nice to not second guess your intentions. Even now, knowing that you know, he feels like none of it matters.
"Look," he begins, toying with the hem of your cropped shirt. Lets his fingertips graze your bare skin. Tries his best not to think about what you look like half-naked. Fails. "I only came out tonight 'cause I hoped I'd see you. I don't care about staying out till ass-o'clock, again."
"Think I've only just caught up on sleep," you hum, angling your chin up and giving him the perfect opportunity to make a move that goes beyond flirtatious touches.
"Exactly," he smiles, letting his hand squeeze the side of your waist. Pulls you closer. "And I've not drunk half as much tonight, but I think I could do with you making sure I don't die, again."
"Yeah?"
Nodding as he nudges his nose against yours, Jungkook is all smiles. Lets his lips line up against your pout.
"Yeah," he mumbles—then lets the word get lost in your lips.
Sinking into what it feels like to kiss you, Jungkook can't help but feel satisfaction. Has finally caught the damn butterfly he's been after all week.
He's played a lot of games. Won a lot of battles.
And yet victory has never tasted so sweet.
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JUNGKOOK'S APARTMENT ITAEWON-DONG, YONGSAN-GU SATURDAY 02:07
You retrace your steps. Get a taxi to his place, 'cause there's no point pretending like he can't afford it. Not anymore.
You're not giggling like you were the first time you were in his elevator, but it's kind of impossible to do so when your back is to the wall and Jungkook's tongue is in your mouth.
Your hands roam his body—waist, ass. If you can squeeze it, you will. Just makes him deepen the kisses. If his large hands weren't cupping your jaw, keeping you close, they'd be doing the exact same thing as yours.
The ding of the elevator pulls you apart just for a second, and then you're the one pulling him down to the corridor to his place.
He doesn't open the door. Just kisses you again.
Finally understands what it means to get butterflies, 'cause he's got you, now, and he never wants to lose it.
Hooking his hands beneath your ass, he hoists you up. Gets your legs wrapped around him. Could go in, but where's the fun in that? There's a slight danger of getting caught. He knows the hallway security cameras will definitely pick this up. The threat that it could get leaked online, and the simple fact that he couldn't give a shit if it does, is kind of hot.
"I'm not fucking you out here," you tell him through a hushed giggle, when he rests his forehead against yours.
"Woah," he jokes. "Who said anything about fucking?"
"I can literally feel your boner, Jungkook."
"Touché."
He doesn't even attempt to downplay it. He puts you down. Gets you through the threshold of his apartment. Shoes off by the door, there's no need to be quiet. Yoongi and Taehyung are still out, and will be for hours. He could take his time if he really wanted.
But what he wants is you. Doesn't waste time. Gets you in his room. Kinda feels like you never left. Jungkook still wishes you hadn't, but doesn't mind the idea of you making it up to him now.
"So," you hum, trailing your fingertips across his desk. "This is where the magic happens?"
He smiles a little bashfully, head dropping for a moment before his eyes are on yours again. "Yeah. You could say that."
Now that you're back in his space, it's a little embarrassing just how many clues there were. A headset rests on the desk—black, robust, with his signature bunny ears secured on top—and a mic is hooked up by the monitor. The webcam doesn't look special, but the keyboard subtly glows in his darkened room. Violet, like the LEDs behind his screen.
A laptop covered in vinyl stickers is closed next to the set-up. He uses it when he's not streaming on his desktop. At least three of the stickers are of the Crescent Collective's logo.
Turning to fully face him, you rest your palms behind yourself and perch on the edge of the desk.
He gets a little kick out of seeing you so flippantly disregard the domain in which he dominates. Gives him a point to prove. Gets him closing the space between you, hands on your waist, dipping to your ass to leverage further back on his desk. Knows it's sturdy, 'cause he built it himself, but has never tested out quite how strong it really is. Thinks now's as good a time as any to find out.
Your legs wrap around his body with no thought, just the innate understanding that you want him in a way you're sure thousands of people have only dreamt of: in his room, on his desk, that damn 'Go Live' button just a few short clicks away.
Reaching beside you, there's a smirk on your lips as you retrieve his headset. Put it on him. Say, "The ears are cute, Tokki."
He rolls his eyes. Is fighting a smile, and currently losing. He's seen some lewd shit during his time on the internet and is well aware of the fanart that includes the ears and little else. Always found it kinda funny, before.
Now? He's so hard it almost hurts, and he thinks he could grow to like it.
As your arms drape over his shoulders, he takes them off. Puts them on you, instead. Adjusts the sizing. Gets them just right for you. Is attentive, like that. Pulls his head back a little, and then realises what a problem you're gonna be for him.
It's not so much the addition of animal ears that's getting him insatiable, but seeing you adorned with a crown that is so inherently his that does it.
Jungkook's no saint. He's had his fair share of one-nighters. A couple hours of fun never to be spoken of again. Since the group of them signed to their management agency, they've been repeatedly told how important it is to get NDA's signed. Something about it always feels so icky to Jungkook. Cruel, almost. Has only had a couple hook-ups since then, both with flings he's known for a good couple of years, with no fear of them spilling the beans on how prettily he whines when he cums.
You're the first new girl in a long time. He knows he should really pause things before you cut to the chase—but then your hand is trailing down his thick forearm, delicately stroking his rabbit moon with a curious smile. Decides he doesn't care.
"The ears are cute," he replies. Teasingly adds, "Nabi."
The position of your arms over his shoulders ensures the tattoos he'd traced the week before are fully displayed for him. As his eyes drop to your butterfly, you're curiously smitten by the way his lips move to press a kiss against it again.
"Suit me?"
"Mhmm," he hums, eyes flickering back up to yours. "Should also get you a pair of butterfly wings, or something."
"I'd make you wear them," you tell him with a cheeky glint in your eye. "Turn you into a butterfly, yourself. Your girlies in the chat would love that."
Jungkook knows without a shadow of a doubt he'd let you. Not for the girlies in the chat, but for you.
Ghosting his lips against yours, he's waiting for you to press down. Is letting you take the lead.
Your kisses are sweet. Tepid. Reserved.
You're feeling; his hands on your waist, the pressure of his lip rings, the presence of his nose.
And then he's feeling; your bare skin as his large hands slip beneath the fabric of your shirt, the way your legs wrap around him, the vibration of a small groan against his lips.
The skirt you're in is bunched around your hips, and the positioning is just right for you to feel how hard he is against your underwear. It's a little undignified, you'll admit, but you're impatient, so you take control. Reposition his hand between your legs. Encourage him to take things further.
"Yeah?" He checks.
Nodding into a needy kiss, you mumble, "Please."
It might've been a while, but Jungkook's muscle memory is enviable. He's the best player on the team for that very reason.
As he hooks your underwear to the side, he's pleased to be greeted with indications of your arousal. Smirks into the kisses he's giving you, as his fingertips graze against your clit. Trails his lips to your neck. Wants to hear the way you gasp as he pushes his thick middle finger inside you.
"Fuck," you sigh at the welcome intrusion. Nod, as he curls his finger almost immediately. He's got a lot to thank those damn video games for, that's for sure.
Softly moaning, just how he hoped you would, there's an arch to your back as he picks up a pace. The need to perform, almost.
Head tipping back as Jungkook fucks another finger into you, you're unable to think too cognitively. Can only think about the way he feels. The smell of his hair as he presses kisses against your neck, and how prominent his collarbones are as your nails trail up his toned torso.
"Feels so good," you tell him. Move the hand of yours that's been resting on his shoulder to his hair. Tug on it a little. Elicit the prettiest of whines from him.
There's something to be said for making a man—especially one of such strength, stature, status—so weak. Gets you all giggly. Jungkook can feel the satisfaction ripple through your entire body, and it just makes him groan against your neck even more.
"You're so wet," he praises, pulling back to study your face as he plays with you. Lets his thumb stroke up against your clit ever so gently. Revels in the way you get a little shaky. Twitchy. With those damn bunny ears, you really are like a little rabbit. Jungkook finally understands why the fan artists choose to draw him in such a way. It is hot. "You're making me so fuckin' hard."
And then you're giggling again.
"Is it a joke to you, huh?" He smirks. Looks down at your pussy, all swollen and sopping wet for him, in the hazy violet light of his room. Knows that his throbbing cock is gonna stuff you so fuckin' full that laughing won't be an option. Is desperate for it. "How badly I want you is just a big joke to you, huh, bunny?"
The way he groups you in with his moniker is too damn hot.
"Dunno," you rasp, desperately trying to hold off the orgasm that's building inside you. "Fuck me and find out."
Reaching for the button of his trousers, you're quick as you wrestle his jeans down over his ass. Don't bother pushing them down entirely. Just enough to get his boxers exposed, and in turn, his thick cock. Hard and engorged, his desperation for you is evident. A small patch of precum seeps through the fabric of his boxers. He curses as your thumb strokes against it.
"Condom?" You ask, knowing you've got none on you.
"Hold that thought," he says, regretfully pulling away from you.
Watching on as he pushes down his jeans, and strips himself of his shirt, you're at a loss for words. You've seen him like this before, but it's so much hotter knowing that he's gonna be fucking himself into you as soon as he possibly can.
Jungkook could very easily lead you to his bed. Get you comfy. Reach to his bedside cabinet for a condom. Fuck you how he likes—doggy-style, minimal face-to-face contact—and be done with it all very quickly.
Instead, he says, "Stay here."
Doing as you're told, you watch on as he walks to the cabinet, and retrieves a condom. Admire his back, and his broad shoulders. The valley of his spine, and the hard work he's put into crafting his physique. Smirk to yourself as he dips into his boxers. Strokes himself. Once, twice. Tears the packet open with his teeth, just like you were always taught not to do, and rolls the latex down his thick shaft.
"What?" he smirks as he walks back, realising your eyes are transfixed on his cock.
You say nothing. Smile. Hold your hands out for Jungkook to take, just so you can pull him back even quicker.
Lips pressing into yours as he closes the gap, Jungkook is all smiles. Rubs the head of his cock against your pussy, gathering up your arousal all over his tip. Lines himself up with your entrance. Waits for you to give him the go-ahead.
Hand on his ass, you pull him closer. Edge the crown of his cock into you. Whimper. Beg. "Please."
Sinking into you with a laboured grunt, he's surprised with how much tighter you are around his cock than you were with his fingers. Wet and warm, there's an undeniable pleasure that sparks through his body as he gets familiar with the way you feel.
Slowly, his hips begin to pick up a pace. As his tongue strokes into your mouth, there's no dignity to the way he's taking you. The increased pace means heightened moans, and it's not just you—it's him, too.
"Shit, yeah," he grits. "So fuckin' tight, aren't you?"
Whining, you nod into his kisses. Are at his entire disposal as he grips your waist, proving exactly why Tokki is the perfect nickname for him.
As much as he likes the ears, he's a little worried that he might fuck you so hard they fall off. Doesn't wanna break them, and definitely doesn't wanna think about the story the boys would make up when they go live tomorrow to tease him—but also really wants to fuck you harder.
Which is funny, cause the way he tugs them off with such desperation and tosses them down, you'd be forgiven for thinking he couldn't care less about breaking them. Doesn't give you a chance to say anything, 'cause his big hands are cradling your face, bringing you in for desperate kisses once more.
There's a lewdness to the sounds you make together, but Jungkook knows that if he was an entirely different kind of streamer, you'd make bank together. Wonders about the way it would look on camera. Worries. Pauses.
"You good?" You check a little breathlessly as he reaches behind you, just to tug the wire to his webcam from the plus.
"Yeah," he nods, still fiddling around behind you. Smiles in the hedonistic haze as your lips find a new home on his neck. Strokes your hair gently, and presses a kiss to the side of your head. Quietly says, "Just making sure there's no way in hell I accidentally start streaming."
You hum, all purry and pliant. "People would pay good money to see it."
While he agrees, and has had the same thought process, he doesn't care. "You saying I should be charging you for this?"
"Oh, no," you say all very sweetly. "You should be paying me."
"I'll pay you with orgasms," he promises, knowing that it's a rare currency for one-night strands.
You smirk. Pat the top of his head. "Sure you will."
If there's one thing Jungkook loves, it's a challenge.
Pulling back, he turns you around. Gets you bent over his desk with zero opposition from you. Rubs himself against your soaked cunt, then asks, "Yeah?"
"Yeah," you smirk, and then settle into a sigh as he pushes into you. The feeling of fullness from Jungkook is one that's hard to compare. So thick, and fat, and heavy, his cock really is just as impressive as he is.
With one hand hooked at the crease of your thigh, the other holds the top of your shoulder. Gets you pushed down onto his cock as far as you possibly can be. There's a slight reflection in his streaming plaque beside the monitor, and you're pleased to see just how intensely focused he is on you, brows furrowed, pretty pink lips resting ajar. The silver of his lip rings and chain catch in the light, and you find you can't look at him for too long. He's too hot.
But then he's reaching down for your clit as he fucks into you. Has your legs shaking. The waves of a familiar sensation begin to lap against the shores of your pleasure.
"Fuck," you whine. "Feels good. Keep it like that."
Jungkook knows better than to ignore your requests. Does as he's told, the pressure of his fingers on your clit only deepening. Rubbing calculated circles against you, he knows just how to work you up. Gets you whining. Mewling. Moaning.
"Gonna cum, aren't you?" he smirks, as his own high builds.
"Fuck—"
"C'mon," he husks, feeling your walls tighten around him. He doesn't stop his relentless chase. Will win your orgasms fair and square. Continues pounding into you. Pace fast, strokes deep, he's everything you could ever want and more—and then he's slowing. Keeping you plugged, nice and deep, but focusing on the way he's toying with your clit. "You know you wanna cream for me. All over my cock, pretty Nabi. C'mon—"
"I'm close," you all but whimper. "So—fuck. So close."
"Yeah, you are," he tells you—and then your legs are shaking, pussy tightly clamping around his cock, one hand tense against his desk while the other grabs at his wrist. Uncontrollable, is the way you whine for him. It's so needy—so desperate and pathetic—that it's almost a sob. Jungkook doesn't ease up. In fact, his hips gain a little pace again as your orgasm shatters around you both. He's breathless, but manages to choke out, "Flithy fuckin' cunt. Feels so fuckin' good. Fuck."
The frail limpness of your body as the orgasm smokes away is cute. Jungkook loves it. You're so weak for him. He fucks into you still, chasing his own high, and your whines only get louder. It's overwhelming, but you never want to lose the feeling.
It doesn't take much. Just a minute or so of your tight cunt, and Jungkook is pulling out. Even though he doesn't ask you to, you get to your knees as he tears the condom off.
"In my mouth," you beg, and who is he to reject such an offer?
Jerking himself to completion, Jungkook is all pretty and pathetic when he cums, too. Looks at you with eyes so starry you'd been forgiven for thinking he was a descendant of the constellations.
He milks the final few spurts of himself onto your wet tongue, and curses when you press dainty kisses to his tip. Stroking your tongue against him, you don't want to waste a drop. Look up at him and find that his eyes are resting shut from the pleasure of it all.
Silence surrounds you both, just your beating hearts and laboured breaths filling to the room. He helps you up. Holds you tight. Hugs you for a little while, then presses a kiss to the side of your head. "Thanks."
"My pleasure," you giggle - and then he's smiling, too. Feels vindicated by his irrational thoughts about you over the last few days. He pays no mind to the fact you're still technically dressed, and he's basically naked.
As he sorts himself out, you perch back up on his desk and languidly swing your legs. Enjoy the thought of memories plaguing him whenever he tried to play his little games over the next few days.
"You wanna grab a shower?" he offers. "Food, too? Dunno about you, but I'm fuckin' starving."
"Same," you nod, biting down on your bottom lip. "I'll go wash up, you sort food? Are places still open for delivery?"
Checking his phone for the time, Jungkook is surprised that it's closer to midnight than it is to his morning alarm. Only a handful of places will offer delivery at this time, but that's enough.
"Works for me," he says with a yawn, then opens what you had assumed was the closet door. Reveals an en-suite and knocks his head to the side. "Get your shower. Gimmie a shout if you need anything."
Tiles large and grey, it's the perfect counterpart to his bedroom. A little dark, but it's only because Jungkook hates using the big light. Always flicks the small light switches instead. There's a window overlooking the city, and even though you're only seven floors up, the hills of Yongsan-gu mean that he's got a view you could only dream of.
You're about to start the shower up when he calls through. "Is pizza good?"
"Pizza's good," you call back with a smile. Look yourself in the mirror and wonder how the fuck you ended up in the bathroom of arguably the most famous person you've ever met. Decide it's better not to question it.
The shower begins to cascade down, even if your sins are washed way, you know you won't be able to forget the feeling of Jungkook so easily.
Truth be told, you won't even try.
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YONSEI UNIVERSITY DORMS DAESIN-DONG, SEODAEMUN-GU SUNDAY 21:13
"L in the chat," booms the voice of Taehyung through your laptop speakers. His trademark grin rests on his face as he teases Jungkook.
You've only just opened the stream. Instantly, you focus on the prettily lopsided smirk of Jungkook's lips. You've learned it's an almost permanent fixture on his boyish face. Shaking his head, he's adjusting his headset. Making it a little looser so that it'll fit him properly.
No one is questioning it.
What they are questioning, is where the fuck that pretty purple bruise on his neck has come from.
"Cross-fit," Jungkook just shrugs, knowing that it's the colloquial term for suspicious bruises after some idol used the same excuse. Blatant horseshit. Jungkook doesn't care.
"I've never done cross-fit, but I know you're bullshitting," Taehyung snorts.
The chat seems to agree with him.
"Thought I was a virgin?" Jungkook states a little cheekily, making reference to Taehyung's usual banter. "How else would I get one?"
Taehyung knows better than the retort. Knows that Jungkook could very easily slip something about Rae into the conversation.
Virgin? You type through a message on a private discord chat with Jungkook. He'd set it up the day before. Has already sent you, like, a thousand messages. Is what can only be described as obsessed—but it's mutual. Could have fooled me.
As his eyes glance down to his laptop screen, he fails to hide his smile. Had opened your chat on there, cause he didn't wanna accidentally broadcast the messages onto his stream. Despite this, he doesn't care that there are nearly 10,000 people in his stream merely minutes into it. Is far more interested in his chat thread with you. Replies immediately.
Stop distracting meI'm working</3
Giggling as the message pings through to you, there's a giddy quality to the way Jungkook makes you feel.
He'd spent the day in bed with you after your night together. Had wanted you to stay when he started streaming that evening. Said he'd only be an hour or so, and was incredibly pouty when you did leave.
It had just been him on last night's stream—headset off 'cause he didn't wanna adjust it back yet, hoodie on to hide his neck. The other boys were nursing hangovers, so he could do what he liked.
What he did do had you incredibly curious. Was just chatting. Talking to the comment section. Sleepily reeling off facts he'd recently learned about butterflies. Debating over their lifespan.
You're not naive to the fact that Jungkook does this streaming stuff as a profession, and are aware that the more people talking about his stream on other platforms, the more viewers he'll get.
Made sense for him to add fuel to the butterfly-related fire by talking about them.
Had sent you a message earlier that evening to ask what kind of butterfly you had on your skin.
A Monarch, you'd told him.
"See, the thing is," Jungkook had rambled to his viewers a little later on. "Most butterflies have super short lifespans—Monarch's included."
Eyes all starry, lights in his bedroom purple as per usual, he'd looked cosy. You wished you'd have stayed.
"But there's a specific kind. Migrating Monarchs. They're the last of their generation—the final butterflies of the year," he marvelled at the magic of it all.
His facts were a little hazy, but he knew enough. Had been down a you-shaped rabbit hole all afternoon.
"And they migrate, right? Move away from home—somewhere warmer—and then it just extends their lifespan. 180 days. Not 30. That's six months. Six months. It's a long time. It's not fleeting. Not in the slightest."
It's also, curiously, exactly how long you're scheduled to stay in Korea for.
"I dunno," Jungkook had just sighed, a little forlorn, trying to make sense of his thoughts.
He bit down on his bottom lip, stroking his thumb against the hard plastic ears of his headset, then focused on the camera again. Wondered if you were watching.
He simply shrugged. Said, "Counts for something, though, right?"
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sleepwalking ● 20 | jjk
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pairing: jungkook x fem!reader
summary: due to unfortunate circumstances, you ended up managing your ex-boyfriend’s band. you thought you’ve both made peace with it, but suddenly he’s very eager to prove to you that first love never dies.
genre: rockstar!jungkook / exes to lovers
warnings: explicit language, suggestive themes, mentions of drugs, fluff, some angst, SLOW BURN
words: 17.9k
read from the beginning ○ masterlist
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chapter 20 ► so if your wings won't find you heaven, i will bring it down like an ancient bygone
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The next morning arrived very quickly and not even five hours after your nightly rendezvous in the garden, you saw Jungkook again in the corridor of the hotel.
“Your room is right next to mine,” you observed with a certain surprised amusement. “Yet you thought it would be wiser to go out, find some rocks, and toss those at my window?”
Jungkook glanced at the door of his room as if he hadn’t noticed it before.
“Much more private that way,” he said with a shrug—but a mischievous grin betrayed his attempt at nonchalance. “No one suspected a thing.”
“If someone had seen you doing that, they would have probably suspected a lot more,” you said. “Compared to you just knocking on my door like a normal person.”
“I’m a romantic,” he declared, clutching his chest to emphasise his dedication to his actions, which he preferred to regard as whimsical and sweet, rather than unusual and unnecessary. “I prefer my way.”
You looked away and he wondered if he’d taken it too far. But he relaxed when he saw the corners of your lips curve into an already familiar smile as your gaze wandered from the carpeted floors to the fraying edges of the wallpaper near the entrance to the staircase.
His predilection for extravagant gestures and dramatic moves rather than simple, everyday things had been a consistent part of his personality for as long as you’ve known him. And however much you teased him about it, you still found it endearing.
Although to be fair, you found the wildflowers that he’d brought you endearing, too. Pictures that he sent you, captioned ‘us.’ The look in his eyes when he teased you about something. The way he held your hand so absentmindedly sometimes, almost forgetting about it as though your hand was a part of him.
“Should we go, then?” you asked, a little breathless. The old hotel didn’t have an elevator, and you gestured at the staircase. “Unless, of course, you’d prefer to climb into the restaurant through the window.”
Jungkook took the teasing in stride, maintaining a dignified grin. “Stairs will work, I’m sure.”
“Well, if you’re sure.”
He followed you, beaming as if he were a ten-year-old who had just held hands with a pretty girl for the first time during fifth-grade recess. He didn’t know how to contain everything he was feeling. He might have actually stopped, dropped, and rolled down the stairs like an exhilarated sack of potatoes if he’d known you were feeling the same.
“So,” you said, keeping your eyes on your feet as the two of you climbed down the narrow, creaking staircase. There were small, foggy windows scattered here and there, filtering beams of tired sunlight. “Escape from New York.”
It took Jungkook a few seconds to recognise that this was the film you’d talked about last night. His mind seemed to consider this information secondary—overshadowed, understandably, by his grandmother’s voice after she called him and the lingering memory of the scent of your hair.
“Yeah,” he said, stopping in front of the arch that led from the stairwell into the lobby. “I’m thinking the odds of catching it in cinemas are very slim, right?”
“They are,” you confirmed, stopping, too. “But it’s on Amazon like I suspected. We could watch it tomorrow if you’d like?”
A childlike excitement ignited in his eyes, but a sudden memory dimmed them.
He recalled you telling him that you had plans with Luna and Maggie tonight, and before that—his hands trembled a little at this particular memory—he recalled you saying that you had set an alarm to call your mum.
He was anxious, he realised, on your behalf.
“Tomorrow, uh—” he stammered, lost in the shadows on the staircase behind you as the two of you lingered by the archway. “T-that sounds good.”
You smiled and nodded—that was essentially all you did, but he felt the change. He felt how close you were, he felt your relaxed posture, your easy smile, your calm, confident eyes.
His gaze met yours for no more than a fleeting moment, but he felt the uncertainty in his chest lift, almost inexplicably so. Likely because, despite everything, you were here and nothing else really mattered. You’d be okay.
“You’re going out tonight, right?” he asked and you nodded. He tsk tsk-ed in response, feigning disapproval. “It's a school night. How very irresponsible.”
Your smile grew wider; he noticed it out of the corner of his eye. Something creaked with excitement on the stairs and inside his chest.
“You guys have a day off tomorrow, so I don’t have to babysit,” you bit. “The girls and I had actually been planning this since before we even arrived in Europe.”
“Okay, fair enough,” he said. “How’d you find a bar that’s open long enough on a Wednesday, though?”
“Maggie said she found a cool spot that’s not really a nightclub and not really a bar,” you explained, shrugging. “I’m not sure. We’ll give it a try.”
“Alright. That sounds cool. Let’s do our thing tomorrow,” he said, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “Is it, uh, a girls’ night, then?”
You began to walk, crossing the threshold but slowing down so he could catch up.
“Well, yeah,” you said. “Because if I invite you, then Taehyung will insist on joining, and Luna will inevitably invite him. And then you and I will end up third-wheeling those two all night, while also comforting Maggie. She’ll have one tequila shot and spend the whole night near tears because she misses Rue.”
Jungkook decided not to admit how pleased he was that in a hypothetical scenario where Luna would bring her boyfriend and Maggie would cry about her girlfriend, he was your equivalent partner. Of course, he would have made sure to keep you company so that you wouldn’t feel like anyone’s third-wheel or shoulder to cry on, but he understood the essence of your point.
“That’s alright. I’ll keep myself busy,” he said, a bit concerned about the colour of his face. He reached up, feeling his cheeks with the back of his hand. “I, uh—I hope you guys have fun. Call me if you get into trouble.”
You raised your eyebrows, recognising his way of turning your words against you.
“As if,” you retorted. “I know how to drink responsibly.”
He could remember times when the two of you were so drunk that the sense of responsibility resembled a dystopian concept rather than something people realistically possessed, but he enjoyed the smile on your face too much to bring it up. Even more than that, however, he enjoyed the fact that your smile did not falter, and you did not pull away to a more respectable distance when you entered the restaurant and reached the buffet table with dozens of other people around.
Things were good. They felt good.
You stayed at the buffet table to talk to Namjoon, and Jungkook went to find an empty table at the restaurant. But even as he walked away from you, he still couldn’t do anything about the tint on his cheeks.
He knew he was grinning like a proper maniac as he poured milk into his cereal. But then he met your eyes, and you were smiling at him from across the room, and your face looked radiant and glowing, and he was so in love with you that he didn’t care about his excitement coming off as threatening.
Just then, Minjun approached him with a concerned expression.
“Hey,” he said, sitting across from him at the empty table. “You look stupid. Did you put too much sugar in your cereal again?”
Jungkook snorted and let the spoon clatter into the bowl. “No. Just feeling good, I guess.”
“Huh.” Minjun looked over his shoulder and caught your gaze. He turned back to his friend with a knowing grin. “And, uh… your constant glances in your manager’s direction have something to do with that, I assume?”
“We’re going to watch a film tomorrow. It’s something my grandma suggested,” Jungkook announced with a grandeur that rivalled a lottery winner flaunting their newfound wealth.
It took Minjun a moment to process the whirlwind of changes in Jungkook’s life overnight. The last time he had seen him in Glasgow, Jungkook was, to put it kindly, a wreck. Now, his grandmother was calling him, and he was making plans to watch films with you.
“I’m—” Minjun stopped. He wanted to ask questions, but he did not know what to do with the expression on his face. “I feel like I’ve missed a few episodes of this TV show, but I’m very excited for you.”
Jungkook nodded eagerly—and then hesitated, his smile fading momentarily.
“It’s good, right?” he asked. “That we’re spending time together again.”
Minjun didn’t consider himself an expert in the field of relationships, even though he had some experience. However, when it came to this particular relationship, he didn’t even consider himself an amateur. You and Jungkook operated so utterly enigmatically that he wouldn’t even know where to begin guessing what the correct answer here was.
“Of course,” he affirmed nonetheless. “So, you’re… what? Friends, then?”
“Mhmm,” Jungkook replied with a mouthful of cereal.
“And, uh,” Minjun tapped his index finger on the dent in the lacquered table, “why is that?”
Jungkook swallowed first. “What do you mean wh—”
He noticed Minjun’s deadpan expression. Friendship was not the destination that his friend had imagined for the two of you.
“Fine,” he said, wiping his palms on his pants. “Well, first of all, it’s better than nothing. And—”
“Wait,” Minjun interrupted. “Why is ‘nothing’ the alternative to friendship?”
Jungkook clicked his tongue. “Because we’re complicated people with complicated problems.”
He almost expected Minjun to laugh at the oversimplified response, but his friend remained serious—he may not have known a lot, but he knew that there was a long story hidden behind these short words.
“Okay,” he said.
“Yeah. And second of all,” Jungkook continued, and Minjun wondered if he realised how much he resembled you in the way he spoke sometimes, “if we’re friends, then we can still work together, even if we don’t actually get back together. It’s just safe for us.”
“Ah.” Minjun nodded, recognising the subtle ways in which Jungkook was making this comfortable for you. “That’s the main thing, isn’t it?”
“It’s—well, I don’t know if that’s the main thing,” Jungkook said. For him, the main thing was you staying with Rated Riot. Everything else was an additional thing. “But it’s a—it’s a thing.”
“Hmm. The two of you are a far cry from friends, though,” Minjun remarked. Naturally, Jungkook was about to object, but his friend raised a hand, stopping him. “But I’m glad you two kids are working it out. That’s all I wanted to say.”
Jungkook released his breath and nodded instead of speaking.
He decided this was enough. He didn’t need anything else—neither a pat on the back nor an empty reassurance—to confirm that things were going well.
You had practically built a castle over the ruins in his chest overnight—things were going well.

After breakfast, Namjoon needed your help with the scheduling of recording rooms for the upcoming tour dates. The boys usually used the equipment they’d brought with them, but Yoongi had barricaded himself in his room—Jimin knocked on his door for fifteen minutes to drop off a croissant—so Namjoon, Hoseok, and you decided to book a studio to lure him out.
The scheduling took a while, because London and Paris, for no reason whatsoever, emerged as the two centres of musical innovation this month. Every studio in the vicinity of your accommodation had already been booked, so you were locked in your hotel room until late afternoon.
When you finally found several available spots, Luna and Maggie had already banished Taehyung from his and Luna’s suite—they had the largest one here—and you joined the girls in the bathroom to get ready for the night.
However, even though you joked and chatted with them, you couldn’t stop yourself from mentally counting down the minutes until your phone alarm rang. You’d set it for eight, hoping this would be a convenient time for your mum. You knew she wasn’t working today.
And, shortly after the three of you got ready—six minutes to eight—you left the girls to pre-game in Luna’s bathroom, and went back to your own dark room.
You felt very silly just sitting and staring at your screen, waiting. You could have called your mum early; you were ready for it anyway. But your hands were shaking, and you decided to wait.
You had already dressed and prepared for the rest of the night, but now, as you stared at your phone—two more minutes—you wondered if that had been a mistake. What if you cried? What if you didn’t even want to go anywhere anymore?
Two minutes, as it turned out, had a habit of passing slowly when you wanted them to pass, and passing very quickly when you wanted to prolong them. You pressed the line labelled ‘MUM’ on your phone and held your breath.
You were sitting on the floor—not because you wanted to fully embrace the dramatics of the situation or because the bed wasn’t good enough, but because your phone was charging next to the door, and you couldn’t reach the charger from the bed.
You had kept the light off, so the room was completely dark—now that was because you wanted to embrace the dramatics of the situation—and you hugged your knees to your chest, seemingly sinking deeper into the shadows.
Your mum picked up after the third ring. “Hello?”
“Hi, mum,” you said, and your voice shook despite your best attempts to control it.
“Hi, sweetheart,” she said. She sounded a little disoriented and confused. “Did something happen? Is everything okay?”
You moved your phone away from your head and wiped your cheek on the sleeve of your dark denim jacket. You felt nervous and fidgety.
“It’s—no, everything’s fine,” you replied. “Are you busy? H-how’s Kai?”
“I was just reading. And he’s playing with his friends, love,” your mum said softly—she always spoke as if she was in a crowded room, mindful of disturbing others. “Did you want to talk to him?”
“Oh. No—no, it’s okay,” you said, nibbling on your lower lip. “You, uh, changed your mind about grounding him?”
“Well, he’s awfully lonely,” she said almost apologetically. You figured she wouldn’t stay angry with him for long, especially if he complained about his broken leg—which you suspected he did. “He can’t walk much and he’s miserable.”
“Mhmm. Right.” You scratched under your chin. “I’ll, uh—I’ll check on him later.”
“Okay,” she said, hesitating for a moment. “How—well, how are you? Did something happen?”
The repeated question in place of small talk stung a little, but you knew you’d brought it on yourself. It was natural for her to assume something had happened when you called. For a while now, you’d both had a tacit understanding: she’d text you if she wanted to know how you were, and only call if there was an emergency—such as your brother breaking his leg. But if you really needed her, you would be the one to call.
“No. No, I just—I wanted to talk to you,” you said. “I don’t, um—I don’t really know what to do, so I wanted to… talk to you and maybe that will be helpful. I don’t know, I’m—”
“Sweetheart, what’s going on?” Concern deepened her gentle voice. “Are you hurt?”
“I’m—no, I’m not hurt,” you said. You thought you knew what you had to talk about. But apparently, you hadn’t realised you’d have to articulate your thoughts to have this conversation. “It’s just… I wanted to ask about you and Dad.”
Your heartbeat echoed in your ears while your mum stayed silent on the other end.
“Oh,” she said after a minute. You heard shuffling in the background. You pictured her sitting up, putting her book on the coffee table in her living room, and pulling off the duvet. You pictured her reaching for the floor lamp next to the armchair and switching it on, wondering, all the while, what had happened. “What brought this on?”
You heard a cheerful cry from outside your room and glanced at the window. The stars behind it were obscured by dark clouds. You wondered how long it would take to recap the entirety of this past month for your mum.
“Jungkook and I were talking,” you started. You heard her hold her breath as you went on. “And I just—h-he made me realise that you and I have never really talked about this much.”
Her voice sounded distant. “Well, what is there to talk about?”
Your exhale turned into a half-choked scoff.
“A lot of things, mum,” you said.
She breathed out, then in, then out again in an uncomfortable attempt to keep her composure.
“Wh-what do you want me to say?” she asked.
“Well…” You tugged at the fabric of your black tights. “What was going through your mind when you decided to get back together with Dad?” You paused, sensing the implication in your question. “I’m—I don’t mean to insult you. I’m just—I want to understand your thought process. There seemed to be, um—so much at stake.”
“There was,” she replied with the precision of a teacher confirming that two times two was indeed four. “I had you and your brother. And I still went for it.”
An oppressive silence engulfed your dark room as your mother’s uncertainty made yours grow.
Often, when a marriage started to fall apart, the advice from well-meaning relatives—who, of course, knew more about the relationship than the people in it—revolved around the children. To you, the notion of “staying together for the kids” felt about as profound as a bumblebee repeatedly hitting the glass of a window. And the relationship that your parents had was so bad, so beyond any fixing, that no one even suggested they stayed together in the first place, not even for the children—actually, especially not for the children.
But because your mother had never received this advice—this cursed “do it for the kids”—she did not know how to explain herself to you right now.
“W-were you scared?” you forced yourself to ask.
“Every time,” your mum admitted. You felt a new, powerful surge of despair for this every time and all the years of repeated mistakes that it signified. “But I was still hopeful.”
“But you knew he didn’t change,” you said. “You knew he wouldn’t be a father, wouldn’t be your husband.”
“No,” she said. “I don’t think that’s something you know in the moment.”
You couldn’t tell whether she had convinced herself of this later—as a defence against all the relatives who shook their heads at her—or if this was something she believed from the very beginning.
“Mum, that’s—I don’t think I can ever understand that,” you said, your words pouring out in an uncontrollable torrent of agitation. “Not after what I saw you go through. It—I admire the love that you have. But I just—I can’t help but think it had always been obvious that you and Dad would never work.”
She was silent for another minute, and you were worried that you had really upset her. Then, finally, she spoke again—her voice gentle, warm. “You told me that much.”
“I’m—I did?”
“You were very smart, growing up,” she said. “Well, you still are.”
You felt an unwelcome lump in your throat and a tightness behind your eyes.
“I’m sorry,” you said. “I probably hurt you.”
“You didn’t, sweetheart,” she said, because she always did. “I know it seems—well, difficult to understand. But I really wanted this to work. I wanted to give it a chance. But at a certain point, you finally realise that this is it. It’s enough. That’s when trying becomes pointless—when you can see that it won’t work. But you can’t reach that point if you don’t even try.”
But how many times, you wanted to ask, to yell, how many times did you have to try to reach that point?
“To be honest with you, my thought process was very… well, foolish, perhaps,” she continued. “Looking back, I realise that my judgement was clouded by many of the good moments we shared—because, believe it or not, it wasn’t always bad for us. We were together for… well, for many years. We had some good times.”
Once again, you felt a little disheartened that she avoided mentioning a specific date. You wondered what number of years she would have given—you knew your parents had already been on and off even before they got married.
“So, he wasn’t always like this?” you questioned. “Cold, detached, dismissive? Not worthy of you?”
Your mum seemed a little taken aback by the exhibition of adjectives—none of which came close to the words you wanted to use to describe the man who was theoretically supposed to be your father, and the words your mother had actually used to describe him herself—but she only allowed herself half of a surprised gasp before she pulled herself together.
“He was a lot more than that,” she said. “Both, in a good way and a bad way. And I wanted to try. Our circumstances had changed, we were in different stages of our lives. We’ve both grown. Clouded judgment or not, I thought that, even if he couldn’t be the person I fell in love with, maybe he could still be the person I could love right now.”
“You thought he’d changed,” you concluded. “Grown for you.”
“I did think that,” she agreed. “I believe that people can change—and they do, really. People can absolutely transform. But your father, he—well, he hadn’t. But I wouldn’t have known that for sure if I hadn’t tried.”
You shook your head. “But had he ever—you—never mind. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable with my—”
“No, you’re—you have every right to ask me these things,” she cut in. “I understand your—frustration. But I really wanted this, and I-I felt like I owed it to myself to try everything. Just so I would know that I’ve tried everything. And even though it didn’t work out, I learned more—so much more—about love, about people, and about myself. So, I don’t regret trying.”
You needed a minute to grasp that she really did not sound regretful. But you could not understand that.
You and your brother ended up in the crossfire of it all, and she was the one who put you there, repeatedly. And then she waited for over a decade for you to find the courage to ask her about this because she never volunteered this information herself.
Was there really nothing to regret about this?
“I’m... I’m still learning,” your mum continued after a while. “Because there are some things that we can learn only by experiencing them, and I—well, I want those experiences. I don’t want to look back on my life and wonder what it would have been like if I had tried something that I really wanted, but it really scared me. ‘What if I didn’t run from it, even though running away was safer?’ That was what I thought.”
She had to be brave, you thought, to try and to stop trying. And you knew that she really was. But more than that, she had to stay true to herself as an individual. She had to follow her dreams, her hopes, her wishes. And she did.
Yet, for some reason, you couldn’t find your words.
“I think that,” she said after not hearing your response, “aside from all the other things we do for love, we sometimes need to go through these unsuccessful experiences to truly understand our boundaries and get to know ourselves. And to find peace, really, knowing that we’ve done all that our hearts wanted. At least, that’s how it worked for me. Your dad might have had other motives. I don’t think I will ever truly understand them, but his motives are his own. These are mine. So—well, that was my thought process. I think that’s all I can say.”
“Hmm,” you finally said—just to signal that you've heard her, and now you needed a minute.
She’d told you everything, then.
She was listening to her heart when she got back together with your dad. And listening to one’s heart was not an easy thing to do, you’ve come to know that very well.
But now you wondered if you were okay with her explanation. If you were okay knowing that she did that because she wanted to. If you were okay with her erasing everyone else from the equation and just focusing on herself.
Lately, you’ve come to believe that people were made up of various roles, some of which were put on their gravestones after their death: daughter, sister, wife, mother. They could be more than that, so much more. But they couldn’t suddenly be less.
You thought your mother might have actually been trying to be less.
She was trying, it seemed, to be on her own, void of any roles that framed her into a certain behavioural pattern—the sister, the friend, the wife, the mother—because this way, she could get back together with your dad because she owed it to herself. Because she wanted to try.
It was important to listen to yourself, of course. But her relationship with your dad affected her in every role she had, every role she tried to escape from. It hurt her. And because it hurt her, it hurt those around her, too: her children, her brother, her friends.
And still, she did it again. And again. And again.
No, you didn’t think it was possible to escape all of your roles like that. You didn’t think a person could wake up and, without any repercussions whatsoever, suddenly decide to be an individual, but not a parent. A partner, but not a sibling.
A manager, but not an ex-girlfriend.
A shuddered breath passed your lips, and you closed your eyes. You heard your mum’s even breaths on the other end.
If you weren’t so overwhelmed, you might have admitted to your mum that you understood certain parts of her explanation, but not others.
You understood why she did all the things you’d criticised for years. She did them because she knew that was what she wanted. That was what she believed and hoped for. And precisely because she did what she wanted, she did not regret trying again even though it didn’t work out. She’d listened to her heart, and her heart was now at peace.
And, yet—you were there. Despite her pride about having followed her heart, you were there.
You were the one helping her pick up the pieces for years after your dad left. You were there when she couldn’t breathe, couldn’t get up from the floor, couldn’t stop herself from crying.
You were happy that she was at peace now, happy that she did not regret it. But you did. You regretted it for her. You didn’t think you’d ever feel her peace.
That was what you didn’t understand: how she’d erased those nights, those years when you thought you went through everything she went through right with her. You didn’t understand how she didn’t regret any of it.
You could have asked her about it, but she would have probably repeated all that she’d already said. And maybe you’d never understand her because you weren’t her—you were her daughter, and you could never escape this role. You loved her and you could not feel peace for the suffering she had to endure. The suffering you tried to take away, but couldn’t.
Perhaps you were being unfair to her. But you could only judge her experiences through the lens of your own.
She made a mistake—the same one, several times. She tried to explain it to you, even tried to justify it, but ultimately, that was the way you understood it, and you could not make yourself understand it differently.
However—and it took you great effort to admit this to yourself—just because trying again was a mistake in your mother’s case, that did not necessarily mean it would be a mistake in yours, too. There was a bright side to your lack of understanding.
It certainly seemed that your mum would continue to believe her truth, and you would continue to believe yours, but now you identified a core difference between yourself and her: you could never listen to just your own heart; you had to take another heart into account.
Your heart was frightened. It did not know what to do. But you weren’t just his manager. You loved him. And you knew he loved you. You could not let your fear win.
You weren’t your mum, and you weren’t your dad. And Jungkook wasn’t one or the other, either.
You wondered if this precise moment—this clear distinction—would finally allow you to separate your experiences from your parents’.
“Sweetheart,” your mum said quietly. Your phone felt hot due to the duration of your conversation. “Did something happen that made you want to talk to me about this now? Did you and Jungkook fight?”
You were biting into the inside of your lip with so much force that you could almost taste blood.
“We did. At first,” you said. It was futile to evade her questions now, but your throat still felt scratchy. “But it’s different this time. We’re—I don’t know what we are. We’re trying. Well, he’s trying. And I—I’m scared.”
“Scared of what?”
“Well, scared that someone will get hurt if we get back together.” You tightened your arm around your calves and rested your chin on your knees. Your room had darkened even more; it was very late. “Scared that I won’t be able to keep going if we don’t. I-I don’t know how to explain it. I’m just scared of what will happen.”
“Darling, sometimes, taking the risk is the only way to know what will happen,” she said. “You have to be brave. There are always two kinds of ‘what ifs.’ One good, one bad.”
You ran your fingers through the braids in your ponytail, nearly ruining Maggie’s work.
“You always hoped for the good one,” you said.
“I did.”
“Hmm.”
“I hope for that even now,” she replied. You closed your eyes and exhaled. “I know for certain that your dad and I cannot be together, but I know that precisely because I tried. It’s terrifying, though. I know it is. But I think that a lot of times, fear is an inherent part of love. You’re afraid of losing this person, afraid of hurting them. But you choose them anyway.”
Your hands were so cold that you could feel them over your tights when you ran your nervous fingers across your calves. You watched the hotel floorboards, attempting to make sense of your thoughts.
“Well, it—that doesn’t always make sense,” you said carefully. “Choosing to be together isn’t always, uh, the right decision.”
“Sweetheart,” she said, and you could tell from her tone that she did not understand your allusion to her own relationship. “How can it be the wrong decision for you? I know you’re really calling me because you’re scared you’re hurting him.” You inhaled so sharply here that she had to pause for a moment and continue in a gentler tone. “But you won’t hurt him by being with him. You would hurt him if you pushed him away.”
Your eyes blurred with a sudden moisture that you tried to blink away. You were determined not to succumb to your emotions—not for your parents’ failed relationship, not for the relentless gap between you and your mother that one conversation could not fix, and not for the haunting what-ifs that loomed in the back of your mind.
“I don’t know what exactly happened between you two,” your mum continued. “But I do know this: Jungkook thought you didn’t love him anymore when you broke up. He was, well—broken. But he wants to try again. That was—well, it was not the case for your dad and me. So, I think your odds are very good.”
You straightened, pressing your shoulder blades against the wall.
It was only in Amsterdam that Jungkook told you he had thought you broke up with him because you didn’t love him anymore. Before that, you’d assumed he was the one who no longer cared.
Was this what he talked to your mum about? Or was she just guessing?
“Where—how do you—h-how do you know what he thought after we broke up?” you stammered.
Another silence enveloped the conversation, and you wondered what your mum needed it for.
“That’s…” she started slowly, “another thing that sets you two apart from us.”
A secret. That’s why your mum needed the silence—to figure out how to talk to you about this.
“What is it?” you asked.
It took her another moment—six and a half heartbeats to be precise—to start speaking again.
“Your dad never wrote me anything,” she said. “Not a letter, let alone a poem. Honestly, he could barely write my name on a birthday card.”
You didn’t immediately understand what she was insinuating because you were too busy screaming inside about the irony of your mum being the one who pointed out all the times when your dad did not care about her. And yet she chose him again, and again, and—
You gripped your legs tighter to focus. “How do you know that Jungkook—”
“He sent them to me.”
“What?” You let go of your legs. “What do you—what did he send you?”
“The songs,” she explained patiently. You were too overwhelmed to notice the caution in her words; she could sense your hyperventilation over the phone. “Well, the verses of the songs that he wrote about you.”
You were quiet for a minute. Then another minute. Your mum had to gently coax, “love?” to remind you that you were on a call.
Jungkook said he had talked to your mum because he needed her help. You simply could not fathom the possibility that she was helping him with his song lyrics.
“Why…” You swallowed, trying to come up with a question that wouldn’t make your stomach clench harder. “Why did he send you that?”
“Because I told him he could if he wanted to,” she said. You appreciated her even tone. It helped to slow down the rapid beating of your heart.
“But,” you said, “we were broken up.”
“That’s one side of the story,” she replied. “The other side is that you were still in love. So, while you locked yourself in your room and forbid his name from being spoken around you, he was coping in a different way.”
The air in the room felt dense. You couldn’t tell if you were getting too much oxygen or not enough. Your head was spinning, attacked by the voices in your head, all of them shouting at you in languages you did not understand.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” you asked—the question was heavy, and your voice lowered significantly.
“I asked him if I should tell you,” she explained. “He said only if you asked about him.”
Your heart was in your throat. Your arms were numb. You felt like you were running late for something very important, and you were not going to make it in time.
“I never did,” you whispered.
“No,” she said softly. “You never did. And I didn’t think it was my place to tell.”
“Well, how—what did he say?” you pressed. “Why did he send you th-the songs?”
“He texted me, asking for permission at first,” she recounted. “He wanted to know if—if the lyrics were okay, if they weren’t too obvious, if I would mind and if I thought you would mind.”
“What did you tell him?”
“I told him you might drop everything and move to the Arctic if you found out the songs were about you,” she said. You could hear the smile in her voice. “He said that’s why he asked me instead.”
“Hmm. But that only happened once o-or... you know, twice?” you asked. “Haunting” and “Cursed”—those were the two songs he’d told you he wrote with you in mind. “Right?”
You were almost desperate for her to agree with you. To say that this was it, just these two songs. It was a lot, but you already knew about them. You’d manage to carry on.
Your mum sensed the hope in your voice. Almost unwillingly, she admitted, “at first.”
You were glad, suddenly, that you were sitting on the floor as the hotel room seemed to tremble around you. The realisation that Jungkook had been in touch with your mum, that he was writing about you this whole time—that your mum knew he was writing about you—was a little too strong.
Yoongi wasn’t far off, as it turned out. He thought it was you who looked through Jungkook’s lyrics for him. Apparently, it was your mum.
“The first time he reached out was right when Rated Riot first started making music,” your mum resumed, her words sharp against the lingering silence. “He apologised, and I didn’t think he would contact me again.”
“But he did,” you concluded, almost voiceless as your words stuck in the dryness of your throat.
“He did,” she confirmed. “I think, a lot of times, he was doing it to find out if you were seeing anyone else.”
The voices in your head were quick to latch onto this phrase – a lot of times! a lot of times! a lot of times! – and they yelled it at you from every crevice of your mind.
“Every time he wrote something new about you—a song, or a verse, or even a line that he ended up never including in any of their songs—he’d contact me and ask if it was okay,” your mum said. “But I don’t think he was only asking about the lyrics. He was also asking if I was okay with him still being in love with you. He was, it felt like, trying to see if I’d tell him to stop. To meet someone new.”
You had a pained frown on your face as you brought a hand over your forehead, wondering if what you were feeling was nausea or vertigo.
“Why didn’t you say that to him?” you asked. “To stop? It’s been four years.”
“For the same reason I didn’t say it to you.”
Your lips parted, but you could not find your voice. “W-wh—what—”
“Four years is just a raw number,” your mum said. “It does not account for the days you spent intentionally avoiding each other, remembering everything, and eventually working together. It is neither big nor small, and it is completely irrelevant compared to what you feel inside.”
It seemed to you, for an unthinkable second, that your mum had been waiting for your call about Jungkook—like she knew it would come. Jungkook had called her, and you would, too. It was inevitable.
But how much time has passed between his first call to your mum, and yours, right now? You wanted to claw at your chest until you ripped out every painful needle in your heart for all the years he waited for you, and for all the years you waited for yourself, too.
“And I’ve noticed that he also tried very hard to act like he no longer had any feelings for you when he wrote many of these songs,” your mum added with a conviction that only fuelled the intense turmoil inside of you. “He always claimed that he just needed something for his lyrics. He was just drawing inspiration from personal experience. But I don’t believe that was the entire truth. The lyrics he sent me… they’re a broken heart on paper. They’re a love confession.
“Mum—”
“He tried to tell himself that he’d moved on,” she continued, “but I could tell he hadn’t. You don’t write songs like that about someone you no longer care about.”
You were shaking your head even though she couldn’t see you. You knew your mum was a hopeless romantic, you thought her understanding of love differed from yours very much, and you desperately wanted to believe that you had a rational reason to argue with her.
But really, you were just trying to trick your heart into feeling better. Into believing that you didn’t have nearly as much of an impact on him as he continuously showed you that you did.
You couldn’t breathe.
“I haven’t heard from him in a while until just recently,” your mum said, gently breaking the silence. “Ask him about the song he’s working on now, sweetheart.”
Your heart exploded again. “He—he sent you something else?”
“A few nights ago,” she said. “He said he’s done with the lyrics; he has the demo. He wants to record it now. It’s called—hold on, the title was a mouthful.” You heard some shuffling on her end, overshadowed partially by your racing heart. “Ah, here. It’s called “The Puddle of Champagne on the Bathroom Floor.””
The force of her words made your stomach plummet as goosebumps battled the heat for precedence over your skin.
The past month rushed back to you in disordered flashes – Amsterdam. Your hotel room. Hoseok’s party. Boxes of champagne in the bathroom of Hoseok’s room. The motorcycle ride in Tilburg. The bet. The IV drip in Manchester. Jungkook’s irreparable tendency for big gestures. The pebbles he’d thrown at your window. The kiss in the garden outside the hotel.
You weren’t just his manager. You’d never been just his manager.
“I—I have to go, mum,” you managed to say, leaning against the wall in an attempt to stand up.
You didn’t actually have to go; the girls had promised to wait for you. But your whole body itched with an unrelenting restlessness, and you thought your legs would turn themselves inside out if you didn’t set them in motion right this second.
“Yeah?” she asked with traces of obvious concern in her words. “Call me later, sweetheart, okay?”
“I will,” you promised, lightheaded as you stood and bumped your thigh into the nightstand next to the bed. You unplugged your phone, letting the charger dangle, and navigated the room to the bathroom. Your fingers felt numb as you clutched your phone to your ear. “I—thank you. I love you.”
“Be brave, okay?” your mum said, sending another shiver down your spine. “I love you so much.”
You mumbled something—or may have actually opened your mouth to reply, you weren’t sure of anything anymore—as you ended the call and tossed your phone onto the bed from the doorway of the bathroom.
You needed water first—to wash your face, to drink, and to possibly drown your feelings in.
You weren’t sure, after all, if you were ready to go out with Luna and Maggie tonight. You weren’t sure if you were ready to leave your bathroom at all.
And that was how the girls discovered you twenty minutes later—perched on the counter next to the sink in your bathroom, cradling a towel on your lap as your mind vacillated between impressive emptiness and a thick fog of thoughts that refused to dissipate.
“Hey,” Luna whispered as the two girls slipped into the room. Now that they were here, you thought you could remember hearing a faint knock on the door. “What’s wrong?”
The question finally forced the racing thoughts in your head to stop.
“Nothing,” you responded, using the towel to wipe the water on your face, even though most of it had already dripped onto your black tights a long time ago. You missed the look that Luna and Maggie exchanged. “Sorry, were you—”
“Babe, you’re crying,” Maggie pointed out, carefully pulling your ponytail away from your face and over your shoulder.
You instinctively reached up to your eyes.
“I’m not, this is—it’s water.” You raised the towel as evidence. “I was washing—”
Maggie rubbed your arm patiently. “It’s water coming out of your eyes, babe.”
You glanced over at Luna, but she stood with her arms crossed over her chest and a concerned expression on her face.
We’ll be here a while, her stance was saying. But we’ll get to the bottom of it.
You looked down. “Sorry. I’m really okay.”
“I know you think that if you say you’re okay enough times, people will believe you,” Luna said firmly because her heart had dropped to her heels when Maggie threw the door open, and they found you here, completely dissociated, with a dangerous vacancy in your eyes. “But that’s not what happens. People just pretend to believe you, so you’d feel better. We know you’re not okay.”
You have started to realise that over the last few days.
So, taking an uncertain breath, you told them most of what your mum had just told you: about Jungkook’s heartbreak, and about your own. About his conversations with her, and about your self-imposed vow of silence. About his songs, and about your deliberate blindness for the lyricism, which had always been saturated with sentiments from the past seven years.
You chose not to mention the emptiness you felt after your mum had explained her reasoning for getting back together with your dad because you were worried you would not have enough water or towels to conceal your emotions.
After you finished speaking, Maggie, in her typical manner, made a profound summary of it all: “Well, shit.”
Luna nodded in agreement and tilted her head.
“But wait,” she said. “Why—why is this—but why are you crying about this?”
“I’m not,” you replied. You felt the childish defiance in your tone, but it was so intrinsic for you that you just said it and gave your friend an apologetic look.
“Right.” Luna glanced at her reflection in the mirror behind you, reminding herself that you’d sooner drown yourself in the flood of your tears than admit to crying. “Why are you trying so hard to pretend you’re not crying, then?”
You had to battle yourself a little more until you finally exhaled and leaned your back against the mirror.
“I—well—mostly because it’s just been so long. Fucking ages. And I was, you know. All this time, I was playing my little game.” You raised the pitch of your voice to imitate yourself, “oh, I’m such a great manager, I’m so insanely professional that you wouldn’t even think he’s my fucking ex-boyfriend.” You scoffed, shaking your head. Luna observed the way your hands trembled when you lifted them to your neck. “And he was—he was writing fucking songs about—a-and sending them to my mum to ask for her approval. Her permission. Her—just fucking talking to her. While I wasn’t talking to anyone. While I was acting like I lived in a magic fucking kingdom with purple ponies and rainbows, and no ex-boyfriends.”
The girls shared a look and half of a whole conversation—albeit in different languages, because when Luna opened her mouth to offer comforting words, Maggie placed her hand on your arm and shook her head.
“To be fair,” she said, “before I found out he’s your ex, I would have never suspected it.”
You raised your eyes. “You—well, see! That’s because I was—”
“No, wait, that’s—” Luna interjected, then paused to frown at Maggie. “Actually, hold on. How did you find out?”
You tightened your lips and returned your attention to Maggie. Most of the staff seemed to just know about you and Jungkook—like they knew most things—and you had obviously preferred to pretend like your relationship had never happened, so you’d never asked how they learned about it. But now you were curious.
“He told me,” Maggie stated simply, pulling away from you to straighten her dress. She kept her eyes on the ground.
“Jungkook?” Luna clarified.
Maggie nodded and looked up at you, tentative. “Yeah. A-and I’m afraid I might have mentioned it to Seokjin after that. And a few people might have overheard, and it, um—well, I think the news spread. But, in my defence, the band already knew.”
“The—” You blinked. “Well, I was the one who told the band. I thought I had to, or it wouldn’t be fair.”
“Oh.” She pondered that for a moment. “Okay. So—okay.”
“But how did you find out about it?” Luna pressed.
“Right.” Maggie bit her lip. She looked at you as she spoke. “It was a little over a year ago. We were drunk one night after a gig, and you were outside with Namjoon and Seokjin, having a smoke or whatever. And one of the roadies made a joke, something about how you three always disappear together. You know, a suggestive joke.”
You groaned. Most of the road crew was not affiliated with the company, so you hired new people for each tour. You recalled a few awful experiences with them and wondered if this would be another one.
“Yeah,” Maggie agreed with your scrunched-up nose. “That’s how I reacted, too. But the roadies kept going, because, you know, it was a joke, they didn’t realise it was hurting anybody. So, they were saying how they’ve heard that you had dated some producer from the label before. And they wondered if Namjoon could have been the guy, and Jin’s just the third wheel to kind of throw everybody off your scent.”
Your frown deepened. “Oh, my God.”
“Right,” she said again, nodding. “Well, Jungkook suddenly stood up and left. I didn’t even realise he was upset or anything, but Hoseok leaned over and asked if I could go check on him, so I went. I found him in the parking lot and asked him what was up, why was he looking so irritated or whatever. And he said he’s the guy you dated, not Namjoon. He said it with so much pride, too, kind of like it was an achievement or something.”
This was the moment when you looked down, and Maggie turned to look at Luna instead. Luna was positively glowing as she processed the new information and made mental notes.
“I think I mentioned that to him, actually,” Maggie went on, “because he later said, “it’s not an achievement if I’ve lost it.” But I was so drunk that I didn’t realise what he was talking about. I asked, “what’s ‘it’? What did you lose?” and he just stopped speaking and pulled out another cigarette.”
Something already tight seemed to tighten even more in your stomach.
Luna was the one who replied with a shake of her head and an affectionate observation: “The two of you have some productive discussions when you’re drunk.”
“Hmmm.” Maggie pulled on the skin around her nail. Her mind was focused on the events that happened later and she turned back to you, admitting, “I-I’m sorry I might have been the one who started the chain of—well, I shouldn’t have told anyone. I only meant to ask Jin if he knew about it, and it—”
“It’s okay,” you cut her off. “No one’s ever said anything to me about it.”
Maggie bit her lip again, still uneasy. “I’m—honestly, up until a few days ago when this whole mess with the bet started, I didn’t even think about that conversation with Jungkook, because—I mean, both of you seemed so normal around each other. Well, you know. He flirted with you all the time, I now realise, but he’s kind of a little shit in general, so it didn’t feel weird. And it didn’t even occur to me to think that the reason he was upset that night was because he was drunk and angry about not being with you anymore. I thought he was just irritated for no reason.”
Your eyes were fixed on the bathroom carpet—hoping, irrationally, that if you stared at it hard enough, it would absorb the fact that Maggie had witnessed Jungkook like this in the very prime of your insistence that you could remain professional and your past relationship would never be a problem. In the very prime of your hopeless attempt to run away from yourself.
“Yeah,” Luna said to her, understanding. “He does that sometimes. Gets upset randomly.”
“Yeah.” Maggie nodded. “A little moody. Comes with the job, I guess.”
Luna nodded back. “Yeah.”
This exchange finally snapped you out of your daze and you shook your head with a resigned smile. Luna’s face brightened as she leaned her hip against the counter next to you, and Maggie chuckled, pressing her shoulder against the wall on your other side.
“You know,” Luna said, turning to look at you. “I always wondered how he managed to resist for so long. I mean, you’ve been with the band for over two years now, right? And all he did was just tease you and make jokes. Like a middle-schooler, pulling the hair of his crush. But, really. How did he hold back from doing more?”
You tried, “but why—”
“I’m sure he was doing it for her,” Maggie interjected, pointing at you as though you were an inanimate object—something placed on the bathroom counter for decoration and easily picked up to discuss. “Maybe because he didn’t think she would want him back.”
“Well, what changed?” Luna questioned. “Why did he suddenly act on his feelings?”
“Well, Sid came along.”
“Ah.” Luna nodded, remembering suddenly how Jungkook told her that the bet had given him the push he needed. “That’s right.”
Your gaze ricocheted from one girl to the other. Your mind processed their conversation as if it were the plot of a series you had watched rather than something you had lived through.
“Yeah, and look, it may not have been that hard for him to hold back,” Maggie speculated. “Jungkook is the King of Bottled Emotions.”
“That’s true,” Luna agreed. “And he put all his feelings into his songs, which probably helped for the time being.”
“Yeah. That’s probably exactly it. And I think—”
“Okay!” you interjected, smacking your palms against your thighs. You didn’t think you had it in you to handle another and. “Hi? I’m here, too.”
Both girls turned to you with grins that indicated they were well aware of what they were doing.
“How are you feeling?” Luna asked.
“Confused,” you replied, wiping the corners of your eyes with your fingers. They were stained with your wet eyeshadow.
Luna raised a curious eyebrow. “Is that better than what you were feeling before, or—”
“It’s different,” you said, exhaling with a great strain. “I have to talk to him.”
Luna looked startled as she glanced at Maggie. “Uh—r-right now?”
The unexpected question made you lose what little courage you had. “I—I don’t know?”
“I saw him in the lobby earlier,” Maggie admitted slowly, very upset to find herself as the bearer of bad news tonight. “With Minjun. They, um—they left together.”
“Oh.” You looked down. “Well, that—maybe that’s good.”
Neither of your friends thought that was good as they both looked at each other in alarm. For once, they both thought the same thing, and that was a plan of how to track Jungkook down for you. They knew you well enough to fear that if you two did not talk about it right now, you never would.
“Really?” Luna asked uncertainly. “Because we can try to—”
“No, no,” you said. “Maybe I need to calm down first. Somehow.”
The girls both exhaled quietly. Calming down first implied talking to him second.
“Would, um,” Maggie said, “getting wasted help with that?”
You looked at her, a small smile on your lips. “It might.”

It started raining while the girls helped you fix your make-up, and the three of you stepped into the empty street laughing as the wind played havoc with your umbrella while you waited for the taxi. You felt significantly better.
Once you arrived at the bar, you stopped to shake off your umbrella and briefly split from the group as the girls hurried into the warm, dry building. Standing under the canopy by the entrance, you caught something out of the corner of your eye and turned to look. It was a waft of smoke from someone’s cigarette in the smoking area by the side of the building. You didn’t think much of it.
But when you tapped your umbrella against the pavement one last time, the smoker poked his head, gazing somewhere opposite from you. You looked up to see a familiar jet-black hair, styled in an overly gelled quiff, eerily similar to the hairstyle Sid wore every day.
The person did not turn to look at you, but this was enough for dread to grip your stomach, casting a terrible shadow over your uplifted mood.
You tried to rationalise that there was no logical reason for Sid to be in London. This person just couldn’t be him. Sid had showed up in Manchester, sure, but Jungkook had been certain that this was over. Even Sid couldn’t be pathetic enough to follow him all the way to London.
A group of people obstructed your view of the smoker as they tried to pass you to enter the bar. Apologising, you opened the door and finally walked inside.
The place exuded an unexpected elegance. A bar, with numerous tables scattered about, claimed half the space, while a dancefloor was partially concealed behind a row of private mahogany booths. The music was loud, but not overwhelming, and the area was dimly lit by massive chandeliers suspended above each table in every booth. Their faint light barely illuminated the drink menus strewn across the tables.
There weren’t many people here, and this seemed like a lowkey, comfortable place for the night—provided the person outside wasn’t Sid.
“No fucking way,” a voice cried from your left.
Flinching, you turned and noticed the entrance to the men’s room first, and Jude’s expectant eyes next. A chill coursed through you, rendering your legs numb.
No.
No, no, no, no—
“What are the fucking odds?” he exclaimed, grinning. You realised how odd it was for Jude to talk to you without Sid initiating the conversation, and you dreaded, suddenly, that he might come in, too. “This must be—what’s it called when—something about kissing, I think. Kissling? You know? Destiny?”
You swallowed. “Kismet.”
“That’s the one, yeah!” Jude raised his hands victoriously. He appeared to be on something; he had never looked at you for longer than two seconds when he was sober, let alone moved around so vigorously. “Hey, are you here alone?”
“I’m not,” you replied.
“Do you want to join us?” he asked. You didn’t like the plural pronoun one bit.
This had to be a nightmare, you thought. You half-expected to glance down and find yourself standing naked in the middle of the room—and then you would wake up.
Jude’s grin widened when you didn’t respond.
“You know we don’t bite,” he reassured as if your hesitation was about potential biting rather than the insurmountable headache that Sid and Jude collectively induced just by being in the same room with you.
You managed a weak smile. “I’ll pass. You’re hanging around here, then?”
“We were just leaving,” Jude said—who was this “we,” you wondered irritably—and, most impudently, he leaned closer. “We have some molly to keep us company for the rest of the night. They call it mandy in England, did you know? You mix it with speed, and you just fucking fly. You look like you could use some.”
He chuckled and pulled back. You wondered if your reaction showed on your face; Jude did not acknowledge it.
You did not think you needed club drugs. You thought you needed pepper spray.
“Thanks,” you said. “But I’d prefer it if you just left me alone if that’s not too much trouble.”
He laughed—a disturbing echo of Sid’s cackle—and a shiver of revulsion ran down your spine. While Jude wasn’t the most pleasant person to be around, he was usually tolerable when Sid wasn’t by his side. What had he done to him?
“Alright, well, suit yourself,” Jude responded, unfazed. “If you change your mind, you know where to find us.”
You suppressed the urge to rattle off a list of locations where you would look for them—the sewers, a dumpster, a toxic waste site—and pursed your lips.
“So, you’re staying in London?” you asked.
“Yes, ma’am,” he replied cheerily.
You nodded. “Lovely.”
He turned towards the door with his unwavering smirk, but kept glancing back at you every few seconds, seemingly hesitating. You watched his movements like one might watch the launch of a spacecraft—counting down the seconds until it’s in the air and out of your sight.
“Well, we will see you later,” he said, one hand on the handle. He lingered by the door for a good ten seconds, letting the cold air in and clearly anticipating your response.
You cleared your throat. “Not unless I have a say in that.”
He snorted. “Funny. We’ll be thinking of you.”
You did not speak. He did not move.
“Don’t both—” you started and then stopped abruptly.
Jude raised his eyebrows in the doorway. There was something about the way he looked at you, the way he lingered here while Sid smoked outside.
God, this might have been the same instinct that Minjun had to save Jude from Sid, but you sighed and managed a quiet, “Jude, um—be careful, alright?”
A myriad of colours passed on his face as he tried to comprehend your words.
“Wha—why—what do you mean?” he asked, so wide-eyed and utterly astonished that you felt uncomfortable looking at him.
“I’m just saying,” you said awkwardly. “Sid doesn’t care about what happens to you. Make sure you look after yourself. Drink water if you’re going to be tripping on something.”
He stayed frozen, almost statuesque—not blinking, seemingly not even breathing—for so long that you were starting to worry he had astral projected, leaving his corporeal form behind.
“Thank you,” he said after a full minute, with an unexpected clarity that you hadn’t heard from him earlier.
You nodded in response and he finally stepped outside, lingering as if tethered by a new string of hesitation, before finally letting the door close behind him.
When you joined your friends at the table they had picked, you interrupted their conversation about the atmosphere inside the club. Maggie was the first to notice your expression.
“Jesus,” she said. “What happened to you?”
“Jude’s here.”
Both girls looked at each other in dramatic disbelief—Maggie even gasped—and instinctively rose from their seats to crowd around you.
“What? Did you talk to him?” Luna questioned as Maggie pulled you deeper into the booth. The two of them scanned the bar as though Jude was still here, hiding somewhere.
“I—yeah,” you said. “But he left. I think I saw Sid outside.”
Their surprise morphed into complete horror. You gestured for them to sit down.
“But wait—fuck,” Luna said, standing straight. “We can go somewhere else.”
“No, I’m—if they come back, then yes,” you said. “But if they don’t, then let’s just stay here so we don’t run into them elsewhere.”
They looked around warily once more—just in case—before reluctantly settling down. Maggie took a seat next to you, while Luna sat down across the table.
This was when the girls began to fire every question they had, and you repeated the only answer you could offer.
“So, they’re in London,” Maggie said, tapping her nails against the table. “Why?”
“I have no idea,” you said.
“Does Jungkook know?”
“I have no idea.”
“What are you going to do?”
“I have no idea.”
Maggie reclined in her seat, deciding she’s had enough of this game.
“Well,” she said, “that’s great. I need a fucking drink.”
You hummed and brought your hand over the cocktail menu. Luna offered to make the first run to the bar, effectively changing the subject.
But shortly after, when she returned with a tray full of colourful, fruity drinks, you and Maggie were already back to discussing the details of your exchange with Jude—how unusual he seemed, and the awkward turn the conversation took.
“I think that’s enough of Sid and Jude,” Luna said, sitting down across from the two of you and handing out the drinks. “Different topic?”
“Oh, but hold on—while we’re on the topic of awkward conversations,” Maggie said, earning a quizzical look from you both. She ignored it. “Have you talked to that guy? That supervisor guy—you know the one.”
“Oh, Nick?” you asked, picking up your strawberry daiquiri and sliding Maggie’s tequila sunrise towards her. You accidentally nudged the cherry on the rim, causing it to fall into the drink. “Sorry—”
“It’s fine,” she said, deftly rescuing the cherry on its stem and popping it into her mouth.
“I haven’t talked to him yet,” you replied. “But I’m not working for Reconnaissance, that’s decided already.”
“Yeah?” Maggie smirked, punctuating her words with a purposefully seductive sip of her drink. “Anyone in particular help you with that decision?”
Despite her ambiguous question, you took a sip of your drink and felt yourself slowly relax. You were here with your friends. There was no harm to be done to either of you.
“Well, Jin did, actually,” you said. “We had a very productive conversation.”
“Hmm.” Maggie gave Luna a suggestive glance. “And no one else?”
You shrugged. “Yoongi and Namjoon—”
“Okay, you queen of evasion,” Maggie gave up, prompting Luna to giggle on the other side of the table as she absentmindedly stirred her Martini with the paper umbrella. “Are you getting back together with Jungkook or not? After everything that happened tonight?”
The way she said it—almost giving you options, even—was so simple that it made you wonder how much better things might have been between you and Jungkook if the two of you hadn’t been so obnoxiously determined to tiptoe around your feelings and had asked each other questions the way Maggie asked them.
“Well, my mum thinks we should get back together,” you said slowly.
“I care about what you think,” Maggie said—just like that. Luna nodded to herself, making a note to keep drinking until she, too, could start asking complicated questions in such an effortless way.
You finished your drink before speaking.
“I want to try,” you said. “But I’m—you know. I’m also scared that we’ll end up going around in circles, making the same mistakes.”
Maggie regarded you as if you’d dropped your hat in horse shit and put it straight back on.
“Babe, that’s a One Direction song,” she said.
You scoffed and looked down at your glass. “I know. My mum’s favourite, actually. But what I’m trying to say is, I’m scared.”
“Isn’t everyone?” she challenged. “But they still try.”
“They…” Your confidence waned as you realised you might have to talk about the complexities of your parents’ history once again tonight. You wanted to leave that discussion behind, so you finished simply, “they don’t have unsuccessful relationships left, right and centre to get inspiration from.”
“Excuse me?” Maggie arched her brows. “Rue and I have been together for three years—”
“Four,” Luna interjected.
“For four years,” Maggie corrected, “and we couldn’t be happier. Are we not successful?”
Feeling a bit like prey cornered by a very determined predator, you leaned against the back of the booth and cleared your throat. “Well, y-you are, but—”
“Luna and Taehyung!” Maggie continued, fired up. “They’ve been together for a whole year and—”
“Almost two, actually,” Luna said.
“Jesus!” Maggie threw her hands in the air. “I’m bad with dates, okay? Let me live.” She turned back to you as Luna grinned. Exhaling, Maggie continued in a more patient tone, “I mean, there are successful relationships around you. You just choose not to look at them.”
She was right about that, but it didn’t seem quite as simple or straightforward to you.
“Neither of you broke up and then got back together again, though,” you said.
Maggie was mid-syllable (a very frustrated “tha—”) when she realised that she couldn’t really argue. She quieted and frowned, finding her straw with her tongue and taking a long sip of her drink.
Luna took over. “Taehyung and I did, actually.”
Both you and Maggie looked up in surprise.
“What?” Maggie inquired first. “Seriously?”
“Well, it was only for two days,” Luna explained, grabbing a napkin from the dispenser on the edge of the table. “So, I’m not sure if it counts.”
“What happened?” you asked.
She dabbed her lips with the napkin, painting it a gentle shade of plum from her lipstick, and crumpled it.
“We were together for about eight or nine months at the time,” she said. “Rated Riot were on their first cross-country tour. Remember? It was a big deal, and the guys were stressed.” She paused to wait for your nod of confirmation. “We hadn’t seen each other in weeks. He called me one night and just—he said he couldn’t do this to me, that I deserved someone better, that he couldn’t—well, you know. The textbook ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ stuff.”
You and Maggie both nodded.
“How did you make up?” you asked.
“He flew in to see me on his day off and took back everything he’d said.” A faint smile played on her lips as she spoke, but she avoided looking at either of you—the story still felt a little too intimate, too raw to share. “He said he was confused and scared, that’s why he thought it’d be better to break up. But then he said he realised he was even more afraid of losing what we had, so he had to make it right.”
“I remember him flying out to see you,” you said. You remembered yelling at him, too, for leaving the tour right before a concert—but Taehyung usually only listened to Taehyung. “I didn’t know that it was because you broke up. I’m sorry.”
Luna finally looked up, waving her hand dismissively.
“Don’t be, it’s fine,” she said. “We made up. And the break-up barely lasted a few days, I didn’t even have a chance to tell you about it.”
Maggie was smiling as she reached for the brightest remaining cocktail on the table—a Cosmopolitan—and collected the empty glasses, putting them back on the tray. She handed you and Luna glasses of faint pink, peach-flavoured cocktails and settled back in her seat.
You nodded in gratitude and turned to Luna once more. “Were you scared? To take him back?”
“No. I…” she trailed off, searching for a better way to explain herself. Maggie, in the meantime, threw her head back and finished her drink. “I don’t know. I kind of—maybe it didn’t sink in that we had broken up? It was very sudden, we hadn’t seen each other in a while, and I knew his tour schedule. I knew we wouldn’t be seeing each other again anytime soon anyway. So, it didn’t feel like a break-up. I was—I think the whole time, I felt like he would come back eventually. Is that weird?”
“It’s romantic,” Maggie exhaled, resting her head on her palms on the table, a wistful haze in her eyes.
“You’re drooling, Mags,” you pointed out, grinning.
She ran her tongue over her lips, then waved her hand around lazily. “Let me.”
Chuckling, Luna passed her a napkin.
“I don’t think it’s weird, either,” you said. “But I—I guess I never felt that certainty. I didn’t think Jungkook would come back.”
“No? Not even when you found out you’d be managing his band?” Luna asked, her smile widening. “Because—listen—I distinctly remember you calling me after you got the offer to work with them, and you were all panicked, asking me if I knew who they were.”
“Oh.” You felt your own lips stretch into a smile. “I remember, too.”
In hindsight, that day had been absurd. You were offered the manager position for a band that you had never heard of, and during the first meeting with the HR representative at the label, you pretended very passionately that you were familiar with their music and the band members themselves. And the rep, in turn, pretended very passionately that he believed you.
“I don’t,” Maggie spoke up. “You didn’t tell me. What happened?”
“Well, she asked me if I knew them,” Luna recalled and you took a moment to sip your neglected drink, “and I said I’ve heard of them. I liked “Haunting,” one of their early songs.”
The mention of the song triggered the memory of Jungkook humming it to you in the bar in Oslo when he told you that he’d written it about you. This memory, in turn, brought back the conversation you’ve had with your mum. Your pulse sped up, and you finished your drink in a futile attempt to slow it down.
“So, she came over after her meeting, and I played her the music video,” Luna continued. “At that point, I didn’t know the names of anyone in the band. “Haunting” was the only song I’d heard. So, I played the video for her, and I was talking about how I thought the bassist was cute—”
“Oh, that’s right, you weren’t dating Taehyung yet!” Maggie interjected, raising her head with a sudden excitement.
Luna nodded. “Yeah. And then I noticed that she’s just kind of staring at the screen, completely in awe. I thought she liked the song, that’s why. So, I asked, “what did you think? It’s good, right?” and she just turned to me, and said in the most blank tone, “that’s Jungkook.””
Maggie’s mouth hung open as she glanced at you. “You didn’t know he was in a band? In that band?!”
You were counting the lines on the mahogany table and stayed quiet. Maggie gestured speechlessly for Luna to please, for the love of God, continue.
“I was confused, too,” Luna said. “I asked, “what do you mean? Your Jungkook?” and she just said, “yeah,” and went quiet again. Well, she also tried to insist he’s not her Jungkook, but I’m trying to give you the short version of the story. Anyway. I played the video again to check for myself. But he had long hair in it, sort of curly. He looked completely different from what I had pictured in my head based on the few things she’d told me.”
Maggie turned to you again. “And you never showed her what he looked like?!”
“I think I did,” you replied uneasily. You had met Luna shortly after your break-up with Jungkook, but you wanted to believe that your secrecy about your relationship wasn’t that bad.
It was—and Luna grinned as she shook her head.
“She didn’t,” she said, turning to Maggie again. “She made sure to delete every single picture they had together. I only saw him once, when she and I took her dog to the vet. She was explaining the dog’s weight loss to the doctor and had to find a picture for reference. The only photo she could find on such short notice was an old screenshot from Snapchat where Jungkook was the one holding the dog. But he had… like, a bowl cut back then? Not the dog, I mean. Jungkook,” she clarified, and all three of you snorted. “He looked cute, of course. But nothing like the guy in the music video, so I didn’t even think about him when I watched it.”
For some reason, hearing about this random picture hurt. It’s been so long and, obviously, you and Jungkook have been through a lot more together—some of which was far worse than an old picture you stumbled upon in your phone by accident—and still, it hurt.
It wasn’t the memory itself that was painful, but the parts of you that were still alive in it. The parts of you that deleted all the pictures, but kept the screenshots. Threw out all the dried flowers, but kept the matching jackets. Blocked all his profiles, but not his phone number.
And there was another keepsake that you couldn’t bring yourself to delete: a video from that fateful birthday party where Jungkook had drunkenly performed a Backstreet Boys song; one of your friends had recorded it on your phone. As soon as he finished the song, Jungkook—wielding a half-empty bottle—chased after you, threatening to bathe you in champagne if you didn’t delete the video right this instant.
You still had it. You still watched it sometimes.
And then, years later, he walked into your office for the first time, his stupid silver necklace catching the sunlight and blinding you as soon as you looked up—just as it would every day for months to come—and there he was. Existing in your life all over again.
And it felt, you thought in retrospect, like he had never truly left. Every absence of him that you tried to manufacture by deleting your shared pictures only served to accentuate the fact that he’d been here once upon a time, and now he wasn’t. It was like missing a tooth—like pulling it out by force—and then continuously running your tongue over the gap.
“So, how come you still had that screenshot?” Maggie asked, her question snapping your attention back to the present.
You cleared your throat in an attempt to mask the undertow of emotions threatening to surface.
“For my dog,” you said. “He looked very chunky in that picture.”
Maggie grinned. “And what did Jungkook look like?”
“He was…” you looked for an adequate word, did not find one, and finished weakly, “there.”
“Hmm, right,” Luna said, with an ambiguous smile on her face. You were afraid of what she’d say next. “My favourite part about it all, is that you chose to accept the job even after you found out Jungkook is in the band.”
“I personally think that’s beautiful,” Maggie, who found everything beautiful after two drinks, chimed in.
You wanted to disagree, to bring up the fact that this job was a great opportunity—it really was!—and that this was the only reason you’d accepted it. Consciously, at least. But the girls were determined to fully ambush you.
“What did you feel when you saw him again as his manager?” Luna asked, shuffling to the very edge of her seat.
“Nothing,” you said, already a little dizzy from the drinks and the intense attention from your friends. You remembered feeling chaos back then; messy, uncontrollable mayhem roaming in your mind. But, compared to your feelings now, it might as well have been nothing. “I knew we’d have to work together, so I—nothing.”
“Oh!” Maggie groaned. “You’re so full of shit.”
You weren’t prepared for the abrupt shift in her tone. “Wh—”
“Let me show you,” she said, forcing the clasp on her purse open to retrieve her phone.
“Show me what?” you asked, still confused and now a little concerned.
“I’ll show you!” she cried out before proceeding to mumble under her breath with intermittent shouts, “oh, how I’ll show you—like no one’s ever shown you anything! before—you won’t know what hit! you when I show you—”
“We get it, Maggie,” Luna interrupted, reaching out to touch Maggie’s wrist. “Get on with it, please.”
“I’m looking—here!” She tapped her screen. “Here, look at this.”
She pointed her phone at Luna, who looked at it and appeared ever more confused than you felt, even though you hadn’t even seen what was on it.
“What—who is that?” she asked.
“That’s her and Jungkook!” Maggie bellowed, sweeping her arm so far back to point at you that she nearly yanked out your earring. “Sitting in an empty bathtub, drinking champagne, and laughing!”
A rush of heat surged through you as Luna gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. “Oh, my God!”
You leaned across the table to grab Maggie’s phone from her.
The picture was beautiful, which was the first thing that you noticed. It was black and white with melancholic shadows swirling in the periphery. It was taken, you realised, from the corridor outside the bathroom during Hoseok’s party in Amsterdam.
Your stomach dropped once more tonight, because, of course, this was the night that Jungkook had named his latest song after.
Your skin felt wrong all of a sudden, and everything inside of you wanted to come out. You gripped Maggie’s phone tighter.
In the picture, both you and Jungkook had your backs to the camera, only visible from the shoulders up because the bathtub concealed the rest. You were holding glasses of champagne.
Jungkook’s gaze, captured in the dimly lit frame, was fixed on you. His head was turned slightly, and if it weren’t for the bright smile on his face, you might not have known it was him; the photograph was too dark. You, on the other hand, had your head thrown back in laughter and blended seamlessly into an unrecognisable silhouette.
Your heart pounded against your ribs as you looked up from your friend’s phone. “When—how did you even take this?”
“You left the door open, you idiots,” Maggie replied.
“Let me see it again,” Luna asked, taking the phone from your shaking hands. “This looks like it could be an actual film poster for an indie romantic drama.”
“Titled,” Maggie added, “When In Bath…”
The two girls snickered, cracking each other up by nodding along to the joke until they were pounding their fists into the table in laughter. You wondered if this was the alcohol.
“Alright, alright,” you interrupted. “It—it’s a great picture. But it doesn’t mean anything.”
“It means you’ve been in love with each other from the very beginning,” Maggie said, seizing the opportunity to play the role of a triumphant attorney, delivering a powerful closing statement in court. “And you can try to act like you haven’t been, like it all came as such a big shock, like you’d moved on, so, oh my God,” she gasped theatrically, “where are all these feelings coming from?!”
You groaned, but Maggie was undeterred, revelling in the dramatic momentum she had built.
“But this,” she lifted her phone as though in a poor production of The Lion King, “speaks louder than words. We know he’s loved you the whole time, your mum confirms it. But look at this. Look at how you’re leaning into him as you laugh. Look at how you’re touching his shoulder. You’ve loved him all along, too.”
Luna, definitely tipsy already, burst into energetic applause, and Maggie took a dramatic bow, her necklace clattering against the table. In her flourish, she nudged her empty cocktail glass with her shoulder, and you leaned over to catch it. A few people from nearby tables turned in your direction.
“So, you see,” Maggie continued before you could ask the two of them to take it easy, “all you’re doing is just making excuses.”
“Well. Here’s another one,” you said, sliding out of the booth. “I’m going to grab us some snacks.”
The girls groaned and made various comments about how they knew this would happen—but their complaints soon transformed into a list of drinks they wanted you to bring back. You smiled, grateful for their short attention span, and diligently noted down their orders on your phone.
And still, even as you walked away, your heart refused to rest.
Jungkook had been right when he said that you needed to talk to your mum. Really, you did. But it wasn’t just her words, her experiences, and her arbitrary decisions that convinced you that you should have listened to the beating in your chest when he was in the room with you.
It was your friends, too—the family you had found and did not even realise it. It was their patience, their courage, their certainty, and their belief.
You felt a lot more determined to see what would happen. A lot more daring to make it happen. And a lot more convinced that it would be okay, eventually.
As soon as you reached the bar, you immediately noticed the change in atmosphere. The club, initially laid-back, had completely transformed as the clock struck midnight. Groups of young people filled the space, hanging out by the bar, dancing, or just chatting loudly at their tables. It took you a while to navigate through the lively crowd and return to your table with your order.
When you did, the girls grabbed the cocktails as if they had never seen any sort of liquor in their lives. They downed them in several big gulps, and, amused by their enthusiasm, you joined in, too.
As the glasses—and the bowls of roasted pistachios—on the tray emptied, the rest of the night blurred into swirls of clapping, laughing, spinning around on the dancefloor, meeting Mick Jagger’s doppelganger, buying drinks, swapping shoes with each other, losing your jackets somewhere around the club, having a Macarena dance battle, buying more drinks, recording yourselves singing along to an Elton John song that had no business being played in a club, starting a very successful conga line (not to an Elton John song), and stealing someone’s pink feather boa.
It was a night.
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Jungkook had made plans with Minjun to distract himself from thoughts of you until tomorrow, and the two of them ended up doing very cultured things. But strolling around West End in the British drizzle wasn’t nearly as enjoyable as they had tried to convince themselves it’d be. Their enthusiasm about this excursion quickly faded, leading them to the nearest pub for a couple of drinks.
Several hours later, when they returned to the hotel, Jungkook didn’t see any light coming from under your door, indicating that you were still out with Luna and Maggie.
He wanted to text you the whole day, but he held back. Taehyung had told him to give you space; that was good advice. Jungkook only managed to follow it partly, but now that you were on proper speaking terms again, he didn’t want to ruin it by suffocating you.
He was bad at this, though.
He took a long shower and attempted to dry his hair, but the second his phone lit up with a text message, he dropped everything he was holding and executed a very intricate leap for the device—slamming his knee into the bedframe in his excitement.
Hissing in pain, he tumbled pitifully onto the carpet, turned on his back, fixed the towel around his waist, and hoisted himself with a grunt.
Droplets of water from his hair splattered on the screen as he unlocked his phone and momentarily confused the facial recognition. Cursing, he entered his passcode to check the sender and cursed once more when he saw that the text hadn’t come from you.
It was yet another message from the same unknown number, and Jungkook threw his phone back on the bed without bothering to read it.
He dried his hair first, then changed into sweats. It was then—while he was pulling his hoodie over his head—that the realisation struck him: unlike the previous texts from this same number, this one wasn’t fully capitalised.
Tentatively, he picked up his phone again and opened the one-sided conversation. He found that, throughout the evening, he’d received four messages from this number. The first contained a video attachment—the preview screen was black, and Jungkook did not want to click on it—followed by three taunting texts:
Remember this? :)
Come on, take a nice trip down memory lane with me, it’s a cute little clip
Do you think your manager would like to see this too? ❤️
He scrolled back up to the attachment and realised that his hands had begun to shake. Even though he had a feeling what he was going to see, he still clicked on the video and held his breath.
Honestly, it wasn’t as bad as he’d expected. Although to be fair, his expectations might have been unrealistic. Unless Sid had resorted to secret cameras, which was extreme even for him, Jungkook had no reason to get this panicked.
But this video was still not good.
It was filmed in a nightclub and the scenes played out in short flashes under the flickering strobe lights, illuminating the dancing bodies around the person recording it. The camera panned to Jungkook and the two people he was dancing with—both dressed in dark leather jumpsuits.
Latex, he saw then. Not leather.
The dancing itself wasn’t the worst part of the video, but Jungkook struggled to decide what was. First, his heartbeat faltered as he watched one of his dance partners pour champagne into his mouth, licking off the excess that missed his lips. Then, he nearly blacked out as the video concluded with him on top of a table—dancing alone at first, and then with his tongue down someone else’s throat, and his hands—
He had a vague recollection of what happened next and stopped the video before he could see it.
It was clear that Sid had to be the one with the voyeuristic lens. Jungkook had gone clubbing with him that night; Jude was sick and Minjun didn’t want to go.
Two things happened then, and Jungkook was vividly aware of both. First, his phone froze: despite turning the video off, it continued to play the faint melody of an old Benny Benassi remix. And then a disconcerting acceleration seized his heart as though the video itself had seeped into his bloodstream.
Instinctively, he turned his phone off and tried to breathe. The hotel room around him fell into a pleasant silence, but that only made the thumping in his chest more pronounced.
Attempting to ease his rising nausea, Jungkook tried to keep his mind clear: the video had been filmed years ago. He wasn’t sure if he was in Rated Riot yet, but he was sure that the two of you were no longer together. Another helpful fact was that, since you became his manager, you have witnessed him in far worse situations—and rescued him from them, too.
And yet, he did not want you to see this.
He wanted to grow, to extricate himself from the clutches of toxic friendships, to find and build a future with you. And this video felt like a painful regression into his past. An embarrassing leap back.
Overwhelmed with discomfort, he chose to keep his phone off for the remainder of the night, even if that meant missing a text from you.
And then, later that night—or rather, in the early hours of the next day—Jungkook was jolted awake by a violent rattle of the doorknob.
Honestly, for an unsettling, half-asleep moment, he thought this was Sid barging in.
However, as his mind gradually woke up, he felt a more realistic concern: other bands had overzealous fans breaking into their hotel rooms. No one on the staff thought that Rated Riot were on a level where they’d need extra security measures, but now he worried that was a mistake.
Just to be safe—in case this was Sid, after all—Jungkook grabbed the nearest available weapon: a lamp from his bedside table. But the cable limited his reach, forcing him to crouch and lean forward to push the handle down and open the door before jumping back into a defensive position.
He nearly dropped the lamp when the door swung open, and he saw you outside.
It was your presence, in general, that he noticed first. Then it was your outfit: the short black satin dress with thin shoulder straps and thick, black tights with a curious embroidery around your thighs. Then it was your tied-back hair. Your dark eyeshadow and glistening lip gloss. A pink feather stuck to your earring.
He didn’t have it in him to move or to return the lamp to its place.
“Oh, shit,” you said, trying to make sense of the scene before you. You propped yourself against the doorframe. “My key wasn’t turning. I thought I left my room unlocked. What are you—wait. Wait, wait.”
You closed your eyes and squeezed the bridge of your nose with your right hand. Jungkook lowered the lamp to the floor, keeping his gaze on you.
“Okay, I’m good,” you decided. “The room was spinning really fast for a second there.” You chuckled, then stopped abruptly and narrowed your eyes at him. “Am I on the right floor?”
Jungkook blinked, then scoffed at the unexpected question.
“You are,” he confirmed, but, even drunk, you recognised the peculiar look on his face—as though there was something else he was waiting for you to realise.
“Shit.” Your eyes widened. You whispered, “I am still in London, right?”
This time, he couldn’t help a small laugh as he approached you. First, he plucked the feather out of your earring. Then, he led you into his room, his arm around your shoulders.
“You are,” he assured again. “You just got the wrong room.”
You exhaled in relief. “Oh, thank fuck.”
Amused, Jungkook directed you towards the bed, which was the only comfortable piece of furniture here. You plopped down on it, bouncing slightly from the force of your energetic descent.
“Can I sit down for a second?” you asked belatedly. “Fuck these shoes. They’re not even—not even mine.”
Jungkook glanced down at your feet. There was a black platform heel with an ankle strap on your left foot, and a burgundy counterpart on your right.
He lifted his eyes back to your face, very confused. “They’re—whose shoes are they?”
“The black one is Maggie’s,” you explained, reaching for the strap, but struggling because the bed was too soft, and the room spun too much. “The other one is Luna’s. We thought it would be funny.”
He bit his lip. It wasn’t the mismatched shoes that entertained him in particular—not while he was sober, at least—but rather your sense of humour when you were drunk.
“Lucky that they’re the same height,” he observed.
“No, no, no, no. We saw that they were, that is why.” You hiccupped and it veered you away from the topic at hand. “Anyway, it’s not funny anymore. Now it hurts.”
You finally reached the strap of the black heel, but could not figure out the intricate workings of the clasp on it. Jungkook lowered himself to his knees in front of you.
“Let me help you,” he said.
You shook your head, maintaining your grip on the strap as you felt his fingertips ghost over yours.
“I can do it,” you insisted, passionate about your independence even when you could not tell what city you were in.
“I’m sure you can,” he said, gracefully pulling your hand away from the shoe. “But let me do it anyway.”
You huffed—in fervent protest or in reluctant agreement, he wasn’t sure. After another half-sigh, half-groan, you moved your hand to your lap and dropped down on your back on his bed.
He smiled softly as he unbuckled the strap and slid the black heel off. As he did, he noticed that the embroidery on your tights was a thin row of roses—and it wrapped around your thigh.
He found that very interesting and looked away immediately.
“So, anyway,” he said, fighting with the strap on the other shoe. “What happened to drinking responsibly?”
You hiccupped again. “Famous last words.”
He chuckled, lifting your leg onto his knee to get a better look at the stubborn clasp. Your contented sigh was the only indication of you being aware that one of your shoes was already off.
“I spoke to my mum,” you announced without any sort of transition or buildup.
Jungkook tightened his grip on your ankle in uncontrollable surprise, forcing you to lift your head off the bed with a puzzled look.
“Oh,” he managed, releasing his hold. “Yeah?”
Another dreamy sigh passed your lips as your thoughts clouded with memories, then cleared in a blissful, inebriated ignorance once more.
“Yeah,” you said, lowering your head again. The mattress was hard, but it felt very nice. “And then to Luna and Maggie.”
“And, uh, what did they say?” he asked, finally pulling the shoe off.
He got up to place the heels in a corner by the nightstand, so you wouldn’t trip over them when—if?—you stood up.
“A lot of things,” you replied, your words floating somewhere on the edges of consciousness, leaving Jungkook to grapple with the unpredictability of your confessions.
“Okay,” he said. “Maybe we should talk about all of that tomorrow.”
A smile started to form on your lips, but it was swiftly interrupted by a yawn. “Ye—yeah. That’d be good.”
Trying to push Sid’s messages away from resurfacing in his mind at the mention of your upcoming conversation, Jungkook observed your futile attempt to sit up. Having been there before—fairly recently—he empathised with the challenge of keeping your head up when you were drunk.
“Are you sure you want to stand?” he asked as you wriggled on your back, stretching out your hands helplessly—sort of like a tipsy turtle that had tipped over on its shell.
It was dangerous, he realised, just how completely infatuated with you he was to still find this incredibly endearing.
“I must,” you declared with an angry determination. Your anger was largely fuelled by the strain in your neck, caused by your perplexing attempts to lift your head and your legs at the same time. “This isn’t my room.”
It could be, Jungkook thought, at least for tonight.
However, the right thing to do was to guide you back to your own room.
“Come on,” he said, taking your hand and settling beside you to wrap his other arm around your shoulders. “Let’s get you to your bed, then.”
“That would be—” you began, gasping when he abruptly pulled you to your feet and the entire room decided to flip upside down. “Oh—you know what? I’m not sure I’m enjoying this spinning much.”
He looked at you in alarm. “Are you going to be sick?”
“I would prefer not to.”
Jungkook pursed his lips to restrain his amusement.
“I don’t remember the last time I saw you this drunk,” he noted.
“Pity,” you mumbled, your eyes closed. You tried to move your lips as little as possible, convinced that this would help with the dizziness. “If you remembered, maybe you could make the spinning stop.”
He tried to take a step forward with you in his arms. “Can you walk? Or I can carry you.”
You opened your eyes and took a deep breath. Dizzy or not, this was now a matter of pride.
“I have—” You peered down as if to check and the carpet by his bed seemed to wobble. “I have legs. Of course, I can walk.”
The proclamation proved short-lived as you stumbled over the edge of the carpet almost immediately. Jungkook shook his head and tightened his hold on you.
“Alright, come here.” He lowered his hands to your midriff. “Ready? One, two—”
“No, no, no,” you protested, pressing your palms firmly against his hands. He felt the cold metal of your room key against his skin; you must have slipped the keyring onto your finger after you tried to use it on his door. “Either I walk, or I crawl. No carrying. Too much spinning as it is.”
He doubted if carrying you would really make your dizziness worse, but he relented nonetheless.
“Come on, then,” he said. “Hold onto me.”
You finally agreed, leaning against him with nearly your whole strength as you attempted to set one foot in front of the other. Your limbs felt wooden and numb.
“You know—it might’ve been nice if you came with us,” you said.
Jungkook felt his heart rate pick up again. You probably felt it too, since your body was pressed into his, but he trusted that alcohol had rendered you oblivious to everything outside of yourself, so he did not worry about it.
“Yeah?” he replied. “I don’t think I could have walked home in your heels, though.”
You laughed so heartily that he had to pause in front of the door before opening it, a cautious—and almost possessive—instinct to shield this moment from prying ears.
“No, no. I meant because it would have been nice,” you clarified meaningfully.
His smile was warm when he looked at you. “Yeah, you said that.”
Dazed, you turned your head to meet his gaze, inadvertently granting him an opportunity to lift you over the threshold as your attention on your feet wavered. “I did?”
“Mmhmm.” He continued to look at you—while holding you so close that you were starting to question how many drinks you’ve really had tonight—as he removed the keyring from your finger. You looked down, confused. You’d forgotten you were clutching your keys in your palm. “So why did you want me to come? Did you miss me that much?”
“Hmm,” you lifted your eyes and poked his cheek in a rare moment of bold affection, “I’m not drunk enough.”
He smiled again. Holding you to him—his grip around your waist was tenacious; not even the slippery satin of your dress posed a challenge—he managed to unlock your door and open it. He wondered if you remembered that your room was three steps away from his.
“Okay,” he said, walking you to your bed in complete darkness with impressive skill. Neither of you bumped into anything or tripped. “Let’s get you into bed until you’re not drunk at all. How does that sound?”
A nod was all you could muster.
Your eyes were barely open when you felt him gently lower you on the bed. Your body, of course, succumbed to gravity with a great eagerness and you dropped onto your back with a grunt the second he let go of you.
Face buried into the pillows, you mumbled, “ffank-oo.”
He deciphered that as an expression of gratitude and carefully rolled you onto your back by pulling the duvet from underneath you. You were still in your dress, but he didn’t dare to go as far as helping you change. You looked half-asleep anyway.
“I’m right there if you need me, okay?” he said, untangling the dark grey duvet and throwing it over you in one swift motion. “Behind the wall.”
Peering at him with half-closed eyes, you turned onto your side.
“I’ll knock,” you said as he tucked the duvet around you in a manner that felt almost familiar, almost routine.
“You do that,” he replied. “Goodn—”
“I think Sid’s in London.”
Your words sucked the air out of the room and locked his breath in his throat.
This sudden lack of filter—or any warning on your face that you were about to say something completely shocking—unnerved him. He had forgotten what a rollercoaster your intoxication could be.
“What?” he blurted out and shook his head. “No. No, that can’t be true.”
You shrugged one of your shoulders against the pillow. Your eyes were still closed.
“I talked to Jude,” you said. “And he said he wasn’t there alone.”
Jungkook turned a few shades paler—a few more and he might have become completely transparent.
“You talked to Jude?” he repeated. “A-about what?”
“Nothing much,” you said. Irony flashed briefly across your features when you opened your eyes. “Just if I’d like to do ecstasy with them. They mix it with speed. And then they fly.”
The surprise on Jungkook’s face was loud. He could not fathom that Jude—of all people—would invite you—of all people!—to do this with them, when you never even drank sparkling water if Sid was in the room.
“Ecstasy?” he repeated.
“MDMA,” you clarified helpfully.
“No—I know what—he—what did you say?”
Your gaze met his for a moment, and the look on your face suddenly appeared very sober.
“I obviously agreed,” you said, “and a beautiful pink unicorn took me back to the hotel.”
He gave you a look and you closed your eyes again, smirking.
“I told him no,” you said. “Or something to that effect.”
Jungkook finally exhaled.
“Okay,” he murmured, glancing at the door of your room. “That—that’s good. I-I’ll take care of it.”
Your eyes flew open, alarm creeping onto your tired expression.
“No,” you said—the steel in your tone made him turn back to you. “Don’t—leave them be.”
“But they’re—”
He stopped when you reached out from under the duvet to put your hand over his outstretched wrist. He hadn’t even realised he was gesticulating—too lost in his sudden panic—but your touch grounded him right away.
“I don’t care,” you reiterated, your words slightly slurred but very firm, a bit like you were talking in your sleep—saving him in the midst of a nightmare that you didn’t realise you were having. “I don’t want you near them.”
“Okay,” he said easily. And again, “okay.”
You watched him for another few seconds, silently witnessing the storm of thoughts behind his eyes. But your own heavy eyelids soon overpowered the few semi-sober areas of your brain.
As you settled back against your pillow and let go of his hand, Jungkook grew even more aware of the texts—and the video—that Sid had sent him.
“Go to sleep,” you mumbled as if sensing his apprehension.
“I will,” he said. Your lips parted as you breathed slowly and he could tell that you’ve told him all that you could manage tonight.
“Thank you for helping me,” you added quietly.
“No problem. That’s what friends do, right?”
You snickered softly and a hazy memory of all that you did as friends rose to the surface of your drunken, tired mind.
“Hmmm.” You buried your face in the pillow, whispering wearily, “I want to kiss you. But I’m so drunk.”
Oh, he realised, breathless. So, that wasn’t all that you could manage to tell him tonight, after all.
Inhaling sharply, he sat down on the edge of your bed because he didn’t trust his legs anymore.
Your intoxication, he thought, should have come with a warning: not suitable for young children and those with faint hearts.
“You—you are,” he said. “You’re really drunk.”
“Tomorrow,” you promised.
Jungkook realised that merely sitting might not be enough to prevent his head from floating away from his body as he gripped your mattress tighter.
“Oh,” he said.
A hint of concern flickered in your drunken mind, and you lifted your heavy head. “Okay?”
“Ye—okay. Of course,” he said, rising to his feet so you wouldn’t strain to look at him. The room seemed to sway, and he wondered if your intoxication was contagious. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight.”
His next actions were reflexive as he leaned down to press a soft kiss on your forehead before drawing the duvet up to your chest. You hummed in content and Jungkook had to turn away, frightened by his own elated expression in the reflection of your hotel room window.
Over the years, you had been the one taking care of him—almost all the time. He couldn’t even remember a lot of the times when you found him, completely wasted, and helped him get back to his hotel room. Or to the bedroom in his family’s house. But even though the details of those nights were blurred in his memory, he remembered every morning – when he woke up tucked in his bed, and the faint scent of your apple shampoo still lingered in his room.
He wondered, as he paused in the doorway, turning to look at you over his shoulder, if you’d remember much from this night.
For a minute, he watched the gentle rhythm of your chest rising and falling as you drifted into sleep, and he was alive with the realisation that the two of you finally had something that he thought you’d lost forever.
You had tomorrow.
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chapter title credits: sleep token, “euclid”
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prev ○ next (coming soon)
strawberry kisses 🍓⊹。ෆ | JJK (18+)
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♡chapters: one / two / three / four / drabble♡
⊹🍓series ❤︎ ˚ ༘ ⋆
❥pairing: badboy!jungkook X virgin!reader // black!reader
❥genre: acquaint. to lovers AU, university AU, angst, drama, smut
❥summary: Jungkook is notoriously known as a f^ckboy who doesn’t eat p^ssy, until he finally gets alone with you…
.⋆。⋆༶⋆˙❀༺⋆。⋆༶⋆˙ .⋆。⋆༶⋆˙❀༺⋆。⋆༶⋆˙ .⋆。⋆༶⋆˙❀༺⋆。⋆༶⋆˙ .⋆ .⋆༶⋆˙❀
❥!!warnings!!: very descriptive virgin talk, reader is a ‘pure’ virgin [hymen], ‘virginity’, ‘v-card’, being scared about sex, eventual slight yandere jungkook, allusions to unsafe decisions and past toxic relationships [PLEASE ADHERE❣️]
❥other warnings: oral fem receiving, fingering, heavy petting, sex sex sex on reader’s mind 24/7, plotting, princess nickname, fuckboy AND badboy jungkook⭐️, stoner jungkook, weed, alcohol, jungkook’s an undercover munch okay, and some shit he says and thinks is very vulgar, light choking, brown coochie desc [cause yeah tee hee], ‘strawberry’ used a lot, first time experiences, grunge/2000s vibe for their appearances and setting, grunge hottie with a y2k babe🎀
❥word count: 10.8k
-inspo: gif from btsjkgifs on tweet,
-jungkook’s weed playlist: so high- dc | party girls- jeremih ft ludacris | into it, swim- chase atlantic | in for it remix
-author’s note: I finally got an actual virgin fic started cause I feel like phony virgins or determined virgins don’t get much show time in fics. Usually they’re shy and innocent, but I wanted insert to be that AND very set on what she wanted. I think it’s more realistic this way with how I wanted Jungkook’s character to compliment hers. Plus, I already did a corruption style type for Angel.
I hope you enjoy this and look forward to the next part! I can’t wait to finish 💗
——————————————୨♥︎୧——————————————
🍓⊹。ෆ
Jungkook was not the best influence on you.
In just a few months, you skipped more classes than you ever had in your academic life, started going to parties, dabbled in a harmless drug, and got stuck with a needle and ink for your first tattoo that signified this phase.
The stick-n-poke Jungkook did on your thigh wasn’t going to last forever—just as you suspected the friendship. It was lined perfectly though, as he was secretly artistic and a perfectionist.
It felt intimate, since you’d done one on him as well. A spider with a jagged abdomen and seven legs was hidden amongst his growing tattoo sleeve... He didn’t get it. Why you chose a sneaky arachnid as the symbol you saw fit for him, you mean. But he laughed and taunted you about your childish drawing skills, admiring your focused face as you carefully poked across his skin that night by the lake.
In your mind, Jungkook was the spider in your tame and boring life when the friendship started. Dangerous and cunning. You, the curious butterfly—like the ink on your thigh—that got too close to his web. All the hang outs and late nights were him spinning you in silk, around and around until he finally had you stuck and unmoving. He wouldn’t strike unless you moved first to get away.
Then he’d take what he wanted.
And you’d let him.
🍓⊹。ෆ————————————————————————୨♥︎୧
The sexual tension between you and Jeon Jungkook was too high to ignore it.
But what did anyone expect to come from a blossoming friendship between a ran-through fuckboy with an attitude problem and a phony virgin.
There were lots of lingering touches and kisses and heavy petting to the point that was all you could think about instead of college work. You were more worried about having Jungkook balls-deep inside you rather than your next exam, experimenting on smoking weed or hitting his vape pen with him until morning.
Despite how fucked up he is, he’d been hooked on your mind since the day you met him. He was the one in all black with the tattoo sleeve, the piercings on his face, and a dark gaze that told you he wanted to do really bad shit to you.
Yeah. That guy.
Notorious badboy who lives faithfully by an “I don’t eat pussy” motto that doesn’t deter him from fucking anyone because he’s just that damn delicious to look at. He likes to get his dick wet with no strings attached and no promised special treatment in return.
Maybe it’s a bit misogynistic that he’ll gladly receive head and won’t give it, but he started lining up too specifically with your sexual desires, so you stayed around.
See, Jungkook keeps to himself. He’s a hit-it-and-quit-it, but his hookups are only known because they brag about how big and good of a fuck he is. Surely, he’d just give you the dick and leave. He wouldn’t boast about gaining another body nor would he name drop. Your not-so-innocent deed would remain a secret.
You’ve kissed quite a few guys up until junior year, some nerds that weren’t too shy to stick their tongue down your throat in the back of the campus library, but no one’s gotten far. Hell, Jungkook hasn’t gotten that far himself. Fondling you through your bra is nothing compared to the many girls he’s banged into oblivion.
Nonetheless, the asshole respects your boundaries. He can get real sex whenever he wants. You’re just a fun filler in-between his other hookups, a girl playing hard to get. He enjoys kissing on the cute, shy babe he sits next to in a math class he barely attends. Gets a thrill out of calling you princess to tease you, because he doesn’t know your real name.
What Jungkook also didn’t know was that you were undeniably on the same wavelength as him. Just in a sugarcoated format. You liked to play. You liked to kiss and touch and feel up on another body… But you were still the doe-like glint in your eyes that your makeup couldn’t shield, the timidness in your step that the cuff of your ass in your mini skirts and your cleavage couldn’t distract.
A virgin. With a very real v-card.
And okay, you get it. Jungkook has got to be the worst option to take it. Even now as you gaze at him he’s wickedly attractive, sporting a vintage band tee and a studded belt because his waist is too slutty to hold up his cargo jeans. His hair has grown into a mullet that fits his wild lifestyle and his sculpted face, curling around his neck where faded hickeys someone else has done stain his honey skin.
He’s a walking red flag.
But you can make your own rash decisions.
Jungkook gets to be so fucking easy and the epitome of a typical fuckboy. Why couldn’t you let this one thing happen for once and for all?
He’d do this quickly, too. Take you hard and fast when you tell him you want it. You’ve heard he fucks like a rabbit, so it’d go smoothly. No questions. Only two bodies bumping against each other to get their fill. Well, you wouldn’t know what the fuck you were doing, but he should be too selfishly horny to notice...
“Princess.”
His voice alone brings a plethora of goosebumps to your skin. You blink out of your dangerous state of mind as he blurs back into view.
“Hm?” You respond.
Jungkook smugly grins, dimples popping in his cheeks as his tongue teases the hoop in his bottom lip. He’d been fixated on you as you spaced out. You hadn’t answered his question for a full minute.
So he repeats himself. “I asked why you were soaking wet when I haven’t done anything to you…?”
“O-Oh.” You realize his hand is indeed up your skirt, the other pressing your hips to the door of your dorm room. You can’t remember the walk here or all the flirting done at the frat party to lead up to this. Clearly, you aren’t as calm as you told yourself you would be when Jungkook brought you to your demise.
It doesn’t help how odd and out of place he looks inside your hyper feminine dorm room either—pink decor, Sanrio plushies, and your strawberry perfume permeating the air in a thick cloud. He’s the only dark theme in your room, intruding the soft-core space with his mysterious aura and the smell of smokey cologne and weed.
There isn’t much talk about your girly decoration though, as Jungkook is eager to have you around his dick and invade your bedsheets with the scent of him. You’d been bold enough to finally take him to the women’s dorms you stayed in, sneaking him through the back door he knew all too well. Per university code, he was down to get fucked. You figured he’d understand what this meant you wanted from him…
Jungkook is rough as he presses his body closer, the passionate wetness of his tongue on your neck and the grip on your hips is nothing you’ve experienced before. You like that he’s not going slow, but the raw, carnal desire is terrifying.
Especially when you feel what he’s working with in his cargos. It grows heavier as his hands travel around your waist to underneath your skirt, grabbing handfuls of your ass and teasing the little thong you decided to slip on earlier. He goes as far as rubbing you right where his experienced fingers know your entrance would be, and, fuck, it feels so much different with having someone else in control of your pleasure.
You feel your panties getting stickier than ever at the mere fact that he’s warming you up for the inevitable. How quickly drenched he’s made you and the noise that escapes when he finds a sensitive spot on your skin. You moan his name, gripping his hand to get a sense of reality.
The fuckboy groans back, stopping to look at you. You can’t believe you’ve chosen death himself over the sweet, kind guy who’s been trying to get with you all month. Brandon would have been all lovey about this… but Jungkook is going to murder you. Specifically, your insides.
He knows it, too, with how he smirks at your flustered expression and panting lips. It makes you nervous that you’ve gotten this far, and you’re back to your shy, timid self when you think about what’s to come next. You’re so close to flaking and leaving him with a hard on once again, but you want this.
So you take it upon yourself to kiss him. It’s barely a peck, and you end up brushing his silver hoop piercing more than his rosey lips. His tongue flicks out to lick the residue of strawberry gloss you left on the corner of his mouth, and Jungkook becomes lost in the flavor of you.
He tilts your chin up and kisses you back.
It’s not gentle or polite like the one you gave him. His tongue demands dominance as soon as your lips touch, his muscle smoothing over the flesh of yours which has you thinking of badder things than tongue kissing. It’s sloppy and urges your hands all over each other, your hips flush together, Jungkook’s legs hitting the edge of your bed, and you nearly falling on top of him.
The way your hips begin grinding on him is so alluring... You’re such an enigma to him right now—as if you weren’t already—that he’s determined to use this opportunity to finally have what’s between your legs.
You become a bit more aggressive since you’re trying to keep up with Jungkook’s tempo and not get him bored, but you can’t help but feel anxious when he cups your chest, breaking the kiss to ogle the cleavage of your lace bra underneath your top. You go to move away, but he yanks you back down on his lap.
“Are you getting all shy on me again?” He whispers. “It’s nothing I’ve never seen before, princess.”
True… but you’ve never been naked in front of anyone else. Your fairy lights aren’t dim enough, and you didn’t think it’d be taking this long to get pounded. This is too intimate.
However, Jungkook is quick to divert your attention by rolling over on top of you. Your skirt rides up with the movement, and he gets a glimpse of delicate, pink panties decorated with a tiny bow. That hug your pussy like a present ready to be unwrapped. They correlate with your bra, too, and Jungkook heavily believes in matching sets gracing him with the best pussy he’s ever had. You’re so done for.
Jungkook admiring how the baby pink contrasts beautifully against your brown skin forces your legs shut in fear. You had worn the lingerie for him, but you didn’t expect staring. Where is his urgency to put his dick in you?
Apparently, nowhere to be found as he follows you further back on your bed, eyes curious and enticing, sizing you up. He hovers over you when your pillows and plushies make it impossible to go further, the skull pendant on the silver chain around his neck dangling in your face.
You clearly want this, otherwise you wouldn’t have said what you said at the party or sent those texts all last night. You’re just too shy to go for what you want, and Jungkook finds it adorable. He chuckles at how skittish and scared you’re being, trying to calm your nerves with some humor.
“What are you, a virgin?” He asks.
It’s a joke. At first. Until you bite down on your tongue and avoid his eyes for a second, unable to maintain your faux confidence any longer.
Jungkook freezes.
Shit.
“No way…” he mumbles, looking at how sexy you are laid out underneath him. It seemed he was contemplating on dipping or not giving an ounce of a fuck that you had never done this before.
He’s suddenly conflicted on how you’ve gotten this far undetected. It makes sense when he reminisces about your bashful antics and you pushing him away before things get too far, but he thought of it as simply respecting that you have boundaries no matter the reason. He just never thought it was because you were… untouched.
Jungkook doesn’t do virgins as much as oral. It’s laughable to find out he’s been played along by a phony virgin the whole time.
“Were you trying to hide it from me?” He tsks, tilting his head down at you. “Cute.”
Your lips are shut together, as you don’t know how to answer, because, yes, you have been hiding your virginity from him. It’s not wrong… but maybe it isn’t so right to have him obliviously deflower you.
He doesn’t make a big deal out of it though, instead waiting on you to speak. So you don’t want to make a big deal out of it either, trying to brush it off.
“A-Are you still gonna…?”
“No, I’m not gonna fuck you,” Jungkook says as he leans in. Your chest hitches when his palm rests on your thigh.
“I’d rip you open, princess…” He mumbles softly, round nose nudging with yours. “You’d probably bleed all over my cock, fuck…”
Weirdly, you were not put off by that. He could tell by how your eyes practically sparkled that you were into it… His jeans feel tighter.
“Unless you want me to?”
You swallow. Unable to say it, but begging to be split in half in your head.
“Such a freak,” Jungkook murmurs. He’s heard quiet girls were the freakiest, but, damn, you were taking the cake.
The room grows quiet, and Jungkook moves as if he’s about to free you from his grasp, leave you high and dry like you’d done to him plenty before, but you’ve gotten too close to spend another night fantasizing about what he’d do to you if given the chance.
You grip his bulging forearm. “C-Can you kiss me?”
Making out has got to be so lackluster to him now, but he doesn’t hesitate to do as you ask. Fitting his mouth to yours is like second nature, the sweet oil of your gloss something he’d never say no to and how your bottom lip pricks between his teeth because he can’t help but to bite.
You mewl right into his lungs, hands roaming up tattooed skin to cradle his neck. His erection bumps against your thigh as he shifts to kiss down your throat again, and you realize that this isn’t actually going to stop when Jungkook starts sucking the tops of your breasts. When his lips meet your belly button, wavering over the sliver of skin between your skirt and cropped shirt.
Jungkook has been waiting as long as you to fuck each other. Is he really going to let your virginity be a deal breaker?
You smell like strawberries again tonight, followed by a hint of cocoa and marshmallow that has Jungkook wanting to stick his nose to every inch of your body and just breathe. You smell so fucking edible to the point that he wants his tongue running all over your melanated skin, too. He doesn’t notice that he’s kissing down your inner thigh until you gasp.
“What are you doing?” You ask nervously, blinking down at him.
He’s quiet for the moment he takes to stare up your skirt, at how your pretty, pink panties is nothing but a string of ruined fabric covering your swollen pussy now. You drip right through the lace and onto his fingers when he rubs you.
“Really wanna taste you,” Jungkook says, barely loud enough for you to hear over the thumping in your chest.
Your throat is too dry to say anything when his eyes flick to yours. He grips your knee to push your legs further apart, getting on his to sit up and lean over you again.
You don’t expect his hand to fall to your neck, thumb brushing your lips as his other palm squeezes your breast. You grab his wrist when he applies some pressure, thinking he’s going to choke you to death, but he just smirks at your doe-eyed expression.
“Princess… I trust that you’ll keep this pretty mouth shut.”
Oh. Right. He didn’t go down on his hookups. Or maybe he tells other girls this same thing, to keep hush about it.
At least all of your efforts wouldn’t be wasted. So you nod with his thumb on your tongue. “O-Okay.”
Jungkook hums at your compliance before reaching for your skirt and telling you to “lift up”. You do as he says and allow him to begin undressing you, your body shivering in anxiety when he throws your skirt on the floor and grips the band of your underwear next. You inhale a deep breath and lift up again, Jungkook’s eyes glazing over at the thick strings of wetness that have pooled in your panties as he drags them down your legs.
The fuckboy isn’t a stranger to getting his partners excited. He knows he has a face that can get anyone soaked. But this? He wouldn’t last for shit.
Jungkook likes it super wet and super tight. From all the women he’s fucked, not every girl feels the same. Virgins have been a big no-no in his sex life, but now he’s rethinking everything he’s ever stood for at a mere glimpse of how wet you are and how your hole looks like it can’t even take his fingers.
He’s about to put his mouth on you for fuck’s sake. This is exactly why he’s avoided your kind.
And you, in particular, are extremely dangerous. Playing as if you’ve had experience the whole time this has been going on, plotting this whole night out from suggesting meeting up at the party and coming back to your dorm. It doesn’t take much to notice that you’re completely hairless and smooth everywhere, too. Skin glowing like you took all morning prepping for a proper dick appointment.
Jungkook isn’t complaining. It’s hot that you dolled yourself all up for him in hopes of getting your v-card taken. Wanted to look like the princess he calls you when he takes you. Which you do.
Fuck, you look like the prettiest pillow princess ever as Jungkook lays on his stomach and yanks your hips closer to his face. You shyly glance up at your fairy lights, becoming embarrassed when he spreads your thighs wider and you can feel your pussy lay out for him. You don’t think you can muster eye contact during this, but you notice Jungkook’s eyes taking in your face and your princess parts without a care in the world.
There’s browns and flushed, dark pink hues that has him biting at his lip piercing in sweltering anticipation, and he’s so damn eager to put his mouth there that he doesn’t think twice about what he’s doing and goes with his instinct to lick. You squirm in response, catching a squeal in your throat at the foreign sensation. Jungkook, on the other hand, is already following up with another lick between your folds and then another…
You taste so sugary, and the way your juices are sticking to his tongue in webs makes him wish he’d eaten you out sooner. His blunt nails dig deeper into your thighs as he pushes his face closer so that his nose bumps with your clit. You begin whimpering, and it’s the perfect motivation to get you further.
Your cunt feels uncomfortably slick, but the tingling and tightening in your core that Jungkook is gracing onto you feels too good. You doubt that he’s never done this before; He’s eating you like it’s his craft. All while looking like—the devil.
His face is perfect for pussy eating, hell, face riding even. There’s no way no one else hasn’t witnessed his cheeks flushing, his furrowed eyebrows and rough tongue as if he’s angry as hell… The fluffy mess upon his head tickling your thighs.
You can’t bring yourself to touch it. You can’t believe someone’s pleasuring you and enjoying it. To keep yourself sane, you bury your face into your pillows and promise to not look down. Your moans are already as humiliating as you thought they would be, you can’t imagine your facial expressions.
But Jungkook finds your noises sweetly airy and sensual, desperate, but sexy. Your shaking legs and how you’re gripping the sheets, too, indicates that he’s treating you right. Gliding his tongue at a rhythmic pace, changing it up for a few seconds to nibble and swirl here and there. He doesn’t think he’s doing it correctly although you’re clenching like crazy.
Licking on pussy he hasn’t been in is so out of his character, but “you taste so fucking good” is all that passes through his swollen lips when he pulls away to catch his breath. You’re adorably hiding behind a Hello Kitty plushie, equally out of breath but able to hum at Jungkook’s compliment.
He doesn’t mind your shyness, which he’d expect from a virgin in the first place, but now he wants to see you lose it. Lose all your composure, rut against his face to get off. Cum. You’ve probably never had an orgasm before.
He proves himself right when he touches your slit with his fingers. You jump as if it’s foreign, too, and your cunt slicks up even more when he brushes your entrance. Jungkook’s rubbed you over your underwear a couple of times before, more so to tease, but it’s clear you haven’t had your own fingers down here to do real work.
So he wraps his lips around your puffy clit, sucking as he sticks his middle finger in your pussy to give you more pleasure… but then realizing he can’t go far or even curl his fingers how he wants because you tense up and—
“You still have a fucking hymen?”
Jungkook was partially kidding about popping your strawberry. He thought that was a traditional myth, or that nowadays many virgin women didn’t always have hymens for natural reasons. He figured you would just be a tight fit. Not that he’d have to actually break you in… To his luck, you keep surprising him.
“I-I’ve never done this before,” you mumble, pulling the Hello Kitty plushie down far enough for him to see your eyes. “I told you I was a…”
“Yeah, as in you haven’t had sex before,” Jungkook responds, tone nearing annoyed as he retracts his finger, careful to not tear you. “Not as in you’re some type of pure virgin bullshit.”
You sit up as he moves from in between your legs, your ears burning at how his lips are glistening from your mess. You hug your knees to your chest and use the plushie to cover yourself as he gets up from the bed.
There’s no way he’s leaving you.
“Jungkook—“
But he’s already made it out the door of your dorm, slamming it shut.
.⋆。⋆༶⋆˙❀༺⋆。⋆༶⋆˙ .⋆。⋆༶⋆˙❀༺ ♥︎ ༶⋆˙ .⋆。⋆༶⋆˙❀༺⋆。⋆༶⋆˙ .⋆ .⋆༶⋆˙❀
🍓⊹。ෆ
Not that he contacted you much before, but Jungkook doesn’t message you for the next week. Not even to get high with him or go to the lake.
It’s a different type of silence between you both with knowing what happened, and you kind of expected it to go down like this after he got a piece of you anyways, to completely ignore you after getting what he could. It sucks that you didn’t get fucked how you imagined, or got to experience a first orgasm, though another experience to jot down in your diary was still a win.
It’s strangely made you confident that you’ve been half naked in front of another man, especially a seasoned fuckboy like Jungkook. If you can have him on your bed like that, then imagine how down bad you’d have your other option—Brandon.
Jungkook’s easy, but you know Brandon’s been trying to hit at you for a while. You could get him to fold with the snap of your fingers. He’s already so flirty and preoccupied with you as the umpteenth party of the semester goes on, him sticking to your side like a lovesick puppy and paying for your fruity cocktails with his daddy’s money.
You can’t be too stuck up on Jungkook when plenty of men have a dick, and, after all, your v-card can’t be much harder to get rid of. You wouldn’t give up a good time with Brandon.
He’s a popular senior with brown skin, dark hair, a bright smile, and gorgeous, hazel eyes. Very cute and lean since he plays varsity soccer. He’s not in a lot of mess with girls, but everyone knows he gets heavy play outside of the field.
Plus, Brandon is the son of some wealthy businessman. He doesn’t need to do much to pull any thirsty bitch, but you’ve been making him work for it. Other girls want to date and marry into his rich family; You just want his dick and maybe that roll of money he keeps unbundling for you.
Brandon can’t possibly suspect you’re a virgin with how you’re feeding into his teasing and teasing right back, knocking out drink after drink and giggling at everything he says. This is the longest you’ve engaged with him outside of class, so you hope you’re giving off that you’re interested in sleeping together, despite the shy and introverted persona you have.
The soccer player seems to understand your reciprocated desire though as he gets touchier and leans in to whisper how good you smell and how sexy you look—because, when has a mini skirt ever failed? But you catch the big, brown eyes of someone across the floor.
Staring.
Jungkook.
You look away first, as he has no shame in letting you know he’s watching you. While sitting between two girls that were practically on top of him.
Urgh. The nerve to glare at you when he’s been walking past you on campus without a word all week… Asshole.
“Did you want another drink?” Brandon asks, rubbing your arm at the sudden change in your facial expression. You like that he doesn’t meddle in who you might’ve seen and offers more poison.
“Yeah, sure,” you tell him. The alcohol has loosened you up quite a lot, but you can still remember the shit that has you pressing yourself to Brandon, so you down another, thankful that your mind gets fuzzier.
It only lasts for a few minutes before you’re reminiscing the other night, Jungkook’s hand on your throat, his tongue in your pussy, and what could’ve been if you weren’t a virgin. You want to say ‘fuck him’ out loud and forget about it and him in general. But you glance back over to where you’d noticed him to see he’s leaving the party. Alone.
Making quick eye contact with you through the crowd. It speaks for itself.
Fine… Let’s talk then.
You step back from the kitchen counter as you set your cup down. “I-I gotta go.”
Brandon chuckles, although he’s not happy about losing his piece of ass. “Want me to drive you back?”
“I drove,” you say, wielding your Sanrio charm decorated keys from your wrist wallet. “But thanks.”
“You can’t drink and drive,” he claims, and within the second of him pulling you back into him, he snatches your keychain. “I can get you back to your dorm, ________.”
“I can drive fine, not drunk,” you mumble. He’s right, you shouldn’t drink and drive, but you’re going to see someone who you trust more to be inebriated around. “Can you give me my keys?”
Brandon pockets them and shrugs. His nonchalant attitude shift is different than how he approaches you in class. “How about we go upstairs to chill before you go? You’re not sober enough to drive.”
“Then I can walk,” you exclaim. He’s pissing you off. Sure, you had a good amount of alcohol, but you’re highly functional, speaking without slurring. Tipsy, maybe, but not drunk. You can’t tell if he’s trying to protect you or be a jackass about you leaving so soon.
“I’ll give you your keys if you give me something in return.”
Okay. Jackass about you leaving so soon it is.
“What?”
“A goodbye kiss,” Brandon frowns, thick eyebrows furrowed. “You’ve been such a tease to me all night, thinking I’ve finally gotten through to you. I didn’t think you’d still be such a prissy good girl around me outside of Chemistry.”
You suck in a nervous breath, understanding how this might look to him. But still… doesn’t mean you owe him anything, and it sounds like he’s alluding to it. You wanted to have sex at first, but you can change your mind whenever you want, right? He’s acting as if you’ve ruined everything by not putting out.
“Or not want me to take you back,” he continues, wrapping his bulging arm around your shoulder as he takes a swig of alcohol. “You’re not as drunk, are you? Like you said? Let me drive you to your dorm.”
You can’t fathom the words coming out of his mouth so casually, and, suddenly, his sharp cologne is stinging your nose, his varsity jacket is heavy on your neck. He’s turned you all the way off, and you’d be pushing it to let him drop you at campus. What would he ask for then?
You wrench his arm away from you. Fuck the keys. A goodbye kiss because he spent his money on you? And can’t handle the idea of sexing up anyone else in here but you? What makes him so entitled.
Brandon calls out to you as you leave your keys behind and push through the crowd, wanting to explode on yourself for what happened and being blinded by something as unserious as your desire to lose your virginity. Brandon was sweet until he wasn’t, but you don’t know if you’re looking at green flags or red ones.
Maybe he was joking about the kiss and playing around? What if he was worried about your safety for real? Ack… Your mind didn’t feel right, but you know how you love to overthink.
Once outside the frat, a sigh visibly escapes your lips and fades into the cool, night air. There’s as many people here as in, but everyone is lit off their alcohol or whatever drugs being passed around to notice your frazzled state as you step down the porch stairs. You figure to head to your car and wait until Brandon eventually gives you your keys back, scared your little baby may get stolen. However, low and behold, parked right next to it in the makeshift parking lot of grass other college students have dumped their cars across, is none other than an iconic blue and white mustang.
Actually… you don’t mind waiting for your keys. Jungkook leaning there against the hood of his old school gem smoking is going to keep you occupied for a while.
You come to a stop in front of him, anxious, but he’d been the reason for you to leave in the first place. It’s not like you’re unwanted in his presence.
Jungkook doesn’t say anything at first, glances at you up and down in your revealing outfit while you check him out the same. He’s in a fitted black top and baggy, dark wash jeans held up by a belt that accentuates his lean yet muscular figure. A chain decorates his neck, and his fingers are shiny with steel rings as he removes the blunt from his mouth to blow the smoke.
He’s so menacing looking like the bad boy he is, curled hair styled to perfection. You’re too entranced by his handsomeness to notice his hand pulling you closer by the back of your thigh to pass you the blunt to hit.
You puff it for a second and exhale the weed in a sigh. It’s something about you being all dolled up in cute makeup, pink clothing, and your leg warmers that makes Jungkook’s lip quirk up at you engaging in illegal behavior with him. He takes another hit when you give it back, your strawberry flavored gloss sweet on his tongue as he lets the smoke fade into the darkness above before finally speaking.
“What’s with you talking to that guy?” He confronts. “Acting like I don’t give you enough attention…”
He wasn’t about to beat around the bush. No wonder he was death staring you.
“Is that what you brought me out here for?” You ask. “I didn’t say anything when those girls were all over you.”
Jungkook clicks his tongue, sharp jaw tightening. “I have girls all over me all the time, princess. Doesn’t mean I want their attention.”
As if on cue, he looks over at a group of girls clearly giggling and gushing about him a few cars over, despite you standing right there. You scowl as you turn back to him to see a smirk on his face.
“Or need it.”
“I didn’t need his attention either,” you feign innocence. What the hell is he trying to get at? So what if you were on Brandon.
“Didn’t look like it.” He sizes you up before catching your eyes again. “You dress like an attention whore, had your tits pressed against his arm the whole time… You wanted him to fuck you, yeah?”
“If I did?”
A beat of silence before Jungkook chuckles, yanking you between his legs by your hips this time to get nose to nose. “He can’t give you what you want.”
“Y-You don’t know what I want.”
“You want me.” He smiles with bunny teeth, and, god, he’s so fucking fine even though he’s so full of himself. “Right, princess? Don’t give me that pout.”
You step back and immediately fix your face before he reaches up to fix it for you. “Is this all you had to talk about?”
It’s his turn to pout at your pissy mood, but it doesn’t stop him from pushing on.
“I didn’t bring you over here for nothing, princess,” he says.
“Then what do you want?”
“To taste your pussy. I thought that part was obvious…” Jungkook nods back at his car, and your breath runs rapid.
No way he had enough room in there to have his head between your legs. Comfortably anyways.
He’s gotta be fucking with you? Eating you out, walking out on you, and ignoring you for a week to then come finish the job? What a joke.
“You’re insane.”
“A little.” Before you can walk too far away, he grips you by the wrist to pull you back. “Wanna hot box?”
“That’s an even dumber idea, Jungkook…”
“Not like it’s stopped you before.”
What’s his fucking issue? He’s acting like the night in your dorm room never happened and that he didn’t ghost you for days after finding out you were a virgin. As if this whole friendship or situationship wasn’t as unhinged already. Now he wants to ‘chill’ after seeing you cozied up with Brandon. Typical fuckboy!
Your choices in men weren’t great, but Jungkook has this special charm to him that bends you to his each and every will. If he wanted to smoke you high, your body was going to find a way to make it possible. Or his raven eyes are just that majestic to have you whispering “Fine…” in agreement, without weighing the consequences.
Next thing you know, Jungkook’s propped the passenger seat forward to let you and him slide into the back of his old school mustang. The back seat isn’t ideal for his height or yours since the roof is lower and a bit cramped, however, you don’t mind having to lie back and being pressed next to Jungkook’s warm body. Hot boxing with him was a cheat on therapy.
The tinted windows fog up ten-fold due to the chilly weather outside and the fumes filling up the vehicle. There’s music playing from the radio that hugs your skin just right, and you loll onto Jungkook’s shoulder as you allow yourself to buzz after the blunt’s gone. How he knew you could use this moment was beyond your comprehension, but motherfuckers like him always knew when to show up and keep bruising their marks before they disappear.
It’s much easier, in his case, when the butterfly on your thigh has yet to fade. He draws circles on the stick-n-poke he’d done on your skin months ago, thumb as soft as a feather. Fingertips lightly grazing the expanse of your smooth, brown legs over and over.
You suspect he’ll kiss you, make out, go as far as sucking on your throat to feed the oral fixation he gets when he’s faded and to fuel the stickiness you get in your panties at his touch. You can smell his cologne on his neck mixing in with the loud as he leans in closer.
“It pisses me off,” he starts, and the huskiness in his voice has your hairs standing on edge. “When you play in my face, princess.”
Your hooded eyes can barely push up a confused eyebrow. “What… What did I do?”
“Make stupid decisions,” Jungkook tsks. “Your little boyfriend doesn’t know?”
He was still stuck on that shit with Brandon? Men were so damn dramatic, hell.
“He’s not my boyfriend, neither are you,” you explain, annoyed. “You didn’t want to take it... What does it matter if I wanted him to?”
“Are you that stupid to have someone else’s tongue up your cunt?” Jungkook utters, finger coming up to coil a curl around it before making eye contact. “I licked it, so it’s mine.”
You giggle. The weed makes your laugh last longer, but it’s funny, genuinely. Staking claim over your coochie because he ate you out? Mr. I Don’t Eat Pussy pressing you about it is crazy. He has to be high out of his mind, but you entertain him back, feeling a little too bold from the kush and alcohol.
“Yours? When you didn’t even do much before running out?”
The car goes quiet except for the audio lowly bumping the speakers. You can’t believe you said what you’d been so pissed about. He surprisingly doesn’t get mad at you coming for his ego, instead, he laughs it off, tonguing his cheek hotly, dangerously.
“Did you wanna be a brat tonight?” Jungkook responds, hand tightening on your thigh. You didn’t know exactly what he meant by it, but you were not up to find out.
You bite your tongue and shake your head, scared out of your mind at what you’re positive crossed both of your consciences in that moment. Jungkook’s veiny hands adorned in those silver rings leaving your ass welted. You, a whimpering mess and regretful about opening your mouth.
“You sure?”
You nod. “Y-Yes...”
Jungkook finds you fucking adorable as you trail off and blank out. He isn’t used to girls thinking around him, so he can’t help but to stare, move a little closer to see if he can read your mind. Your pupils are big, filled with anticipation. Expecting more.
“Is that why you haven’t texted me?” He breaks the silence. “Cause I didn’t get you off?”
From your perspective, you hadn’t thought of it in that way. He didn’t text you, but neither did you text him. The lack of communication is on both parts, but he always hit you up first to hang. He can’t all of a sudden act as if it’s the other way around, like you’re the one dragging him along for the fun of it.
“It’s because you ran out on me in the middle of… doing it, what am I supposed to think?” You ask.
“Princess,” Jungkook makes a noise and throws his head back against the seat. “You’re so hard to understand.”
“W-What do you mean?” What was so hard to understand about wanting to get fucked into your mattress?
“I mean,” he begins, red eyes flicking to yours past his nose. “Have you even touched yourself? Came?”
You blink. “Came…?”
“Orgasmed,” the fuckboy smirks, cheek dimple popping. “When it feels too good and you just let go.”
The flesh of your cheeks warm as you imagine it, the stuff you’ve seen in porn and those times you’ve tried to get yourself there but embarrassingly failed.
“No… but I touch—I touch myself sometimes. I just… rub it. It hurts if…” You avoid his gaze, unable to say it aloud.
“Cause you don’t know what you’re doing,” Jungkook concludes. “You’re jumping ten steps ahead when you haven’t seen a real cock in person, princess. You don’t know what you like.”
Your dolly lashes blink up at him in guilt yet admiration. You have a serious lack of experience with sex, heavy petting being the furthest you’ve gone with Jungkook, and you come to realize that it isn’t smart or safe to be so willing to give up your virginity. You’re clueless enough for the university’s biggest fuckboy and the police’s worst nightmare to hang morality over your head. Jeon Jungkook. Trying to communicate about your nonexistent sex life instead of getting a quick nut.
Oh, god, why does he care? It makes you want to fuck him more instead.
“I get what you’re saying,” you tell him. “But… does it matter? To you, that I’m…”
“Yeah.” He’s back to playing in your hair again, body facing yours, head tilted to the side as he hums. He’s high, but still in control of his actions and words and… agh.
“W-Why?” You ask.
You feel like any other guy would be dying to be a girl’s first time. Jungkook’s restraint and adulation in this situation is so sexy, despite how disposable you’ve heard he treats women.
“Well, I just wanna fuck you,” he honestly admits. “You might not want that from me.”
Your chest pounds faster as he traces the curve of your neck, thumb grazing the tops of your chest and cleavage. No shocker there that he only desires sex from you, can’t keep his eyes off your body. But that’s what you want, too. A good time.
You boldly grab his hand to place it on your chest, and he immediately squeezes. Jungkook’s surprised by your action, and the peek of the lace bra underneath your top isn’t allowing him to think rationally.
You whisper, “What else do you think I want?”
His eyes roam over your body again, before he blinks back into reality and says, “A boyfriend. Commitment.”
“Because I’m a virgin…?”
He nods and reaches up to touch your face.
“Yes. I think girls like you get attached, princess.” He thumbs your bottom lip. “And crazy.”
He has to be wrong. You don’t think you will turn out like that. Not over sex. You care little about your virginity, and you aren’t the type to take it as extremely and give it to someone you vow your life to in marriage. You could have sex and move on like everyone else.
“I was your first, wasn’t I? When you tasted me..?Why can’t you be mine?”
The fuckboy finds your logic flawed. Oral versus intercourse wasn’t anywhere near the same. “That’s not how it works, princess.”
“Then show me how it works, Jungkook.”
Your determination has Jungkook’s dick hardening in his jeans. His sweet and soft princess is so set on what she wants that he doesn’t want to tell you no. Of course, finding out you were a virgin didn’t make you any less desirable to him. If anything, he wants to break you in half and take you for himself.
But, it’s not right. He’s an asshole and commits crimes here and there, but he’s not a bad person. And he doesn’t want to hurt you, whether that’s emotionally or physically. Virgins are stop signs to him for a number of reasons, some shit he’s dealt with as one himself. He just—doesn’t want to take advantage of you. He’s selfish and unavailable in too many ways he needs to be. You don’t deserve that.
It’s a good thing he’s as good as he is when it comes to women. He can give you what you want, all while still not giving you what you really want.
“Open your legs,” he demands, calmly and assertively. As expected, you freeze.
“B-But—“ you stutter, looking around at the tinted windows of the car. Jungkook knows his windows are pitch black, but he likes how nervous you get about possibly being seen exposed.
“Your legs, pretty,” he repeats, tugging on your thighs. “Spread them.”
You let out a breath and lessen your resistance as Jungkook maneuvers your legs over his thighs and coerces you to spread one, enough to let his palm flatten between them, a thumb pressing up against your cute underwear. The crotch is unsurprisingly damp.
“You’re so fucking easy, princess,” he taunts. “Are you sure you’re a virgin?”
“I-I am.” You don’t know if you’re stuttering because of him or how aroused you’re getting. Jungkook and weed is a terrible combination.
Jungkook greedily pushes his fingers down your panties when your mouths connect to feel all of it skin on skin, clit sticky and fuck, yeah, you are a virgin based on how tiny your hole still feels as he circles it.
It’s insane how internally possessive he grows to be reminded. Sex and pleasuring another leaves him satiated but not wanting more than just a quick fuck. With you, he can’t hit it and done. He can’t push your face into the backseat and cram his cock into you. He has to take his time, wants to give it to you right in every way he can.
Virgins aren’t his thing. Eating pussy isn’t his thing. Not when he’s only done it once… He’s just… experimenting. All while developing new, sick fantasies you’ve ingrained into him.
“Can I touch you?” He breaks the kiss to ask, like his digits aren’t already slipping through your folds.
Your ears burn at the faded yet needy look in his pupils. You think he wants to go further, and here you are again, ready to lose your virginity to the fuckiest fuckboy, despite the attitude he’s given the past week. What was wrong with you? And him?
Who knows… You gladly nod your head.
You slightly lift your hips to let him pull your pink panties down your knees, over your leg warmers and platform shoes. They’re discarded somewhere in the car, and you shriek as Jungkook repositions so that you’re more on top of him and your lower half is over his, pelvis angled to better expose your core. You thought P-in-V was next, but you’re not realizing how serious this is until he moves his fingers back down there. The pretty ones with the rings that look like they’ll break you.
“Y-You can’t, I’m…” Too tight. You were too embarrassed to finish your own sentence. However, Jungkook is already ahead. Stupid you to think you could take cock when one finger is about to make you a wreck.
“They’ll fit, princess,” he coos. “Relax.”
You try to do just that by letting your body mold into his, taking slow breaths, vibing with the music you can hear, trying not to be too in your head about what you’re doing. It’s weird at first when he brushes your clit again and starts rubbing it, but the sensation quickly brightens into pleasure. The little nub grows hotter with every circle, and your pussy aches for more.
You whimper a cuss word at your legs jerking and grip his tatted hand when a figure walks by the tinted windows. The party must’ve began dying down and people were leaving. And you’re here in the backseat of Jungkook’s mustang getting your clit beat, wishing he’d stuff you, because you can feel how badly the inside of your walls want to be full.
“Think you can take it?” He rasps in your ear. You nod and moan as he picks up the speed on your hood, using his other hand to fondle your breasts over your shirt.
Like any other woman, you wet yourself easily at Jungkook’s ministrations. By your heavy breathing and squirming, he can tell you’re dying to get a taste, that you want to cum on his fingers so hard. He kisses you more, rubbing and rubbing along your slit until your pussy is drenched on his fingers, and then does he take the opportunity to prod at your hole.
Your body freezes once you ingulf an influx of air, the foreign feeling uncomfortable yet tempting. You want it, despite the sting you have to endure before your core naturally submits and accommodates his ringed finger.
Your breath falters out of your chest as he pushes, and you dig your nails into Jungkook’s wrist. You feel hot, everything’s so hot, and your walls are clenching nonstop.
“I know, I know,” he comforts you, pierced lips whispering against the side of your neck when you throw your head back in ecstasy. “Let me in, pretty.”
“Ngh, fuck, oh my god,” you moan out, wrapping your arm around his neck to hold onto something. No way it feels this good, and you’ve been missing out all this time.
It’s Jungkook’s middle finger you’re clenching around and babbling over, close to ripping the curly tresses out of his scalp with how hard you’re tugging. A delicious sheen of sweat coats your neck as Jungkook drags his digit in and out slowly for you to experience the motion, and you look so sexy spread out on his lap taking it.
Another shadow flits by the car window, and your pussy immediately tightens in excitement. You start trying to rock against his hand to get him deeper, anxiously watching for outside but still enjoying yourself.
“Jungkook, f-faster,” you beg, reaching for his hand and pressing it more against you if possible.
He listens, adding more movement in his wrist, allowing his finger to slip further and quicker into your silky warmth. He’s as breathless as you when you whine out at the feel of his thumb stimulating your clit.
“Pretty little pussy suckin me in so good,” He mumbles against your skin, strawberry scent blessing his nostrils. “Fuck.”
Now he’s imagining you wrapped around his dick sucking him in just like this. Stretching you out until you’re full of him and crying about how it feels too much. So he uses his other hand to spread your pussy, ring finger sliding in next, obsessed with getting your sex to open up for him. He barely has to try. You’re so slick and relaxed and willing that you take the two fingers with little struggle.
“You’re so tight, princess,” Jungkook moans, barely able to move his fingers despite getting them inside. He figures he’ll hurt you if he tries to force further because of your hymen, so he’ll deal with what he can.
“I’m sorry,” you apologize in embarrassment, a bit uncomfortable too now with another finger since it feels bigger.
He guides you back into bliss, though, not allowing you to slip into that insecurity, and bends his head down to aim and spit on your folds like a professional. “Breathe for me, okay?”
“M-Mmkay,” you sob, because he was mental for having the nerve to spit like a freak and then talk to you as if he really cares about your pleasure and well-being.
He doesn’t press you to go any further, accepting that this may be as far as he can get you. Which is fine. You’re a virgin after all. He doesn’t expect you to hop on his dick, hot and ready. He’s much bigger than the two fingers your pussy can’t handle, not to brag. But it’s okay. Vagina was still vagina, and he knows exactly how to satisfyingly end this.
“Don’t think about it,” He whispers, his voice soothing you to unwind and let him take back control.
“Think… Think about what?” You breathe, voice hitching when Jungkook goes to rub your clit, keeping the other two fingers lodged in your tight wetness. He doesn’t answer you and instead slides his fingers deeper. Not thrusting. All of the motion is focusing on your swollen little button.
You don’t expect the buildup to hit you fast and so quickly. Lashes wet with tears, lip bitten raw from trying to keep noises down. But it rips through you without any remorse that you cry out loud.
Jungkook steadily abuses the nerves to get you there, holding you down to his body so you can’t run away from the climax. There’s fingernail indents reddening on his wrist when he slows down, and you gasp as you continue to cling onto him throughout your orgasm.
That was… crazier than you expected. You feel like you’re floating for a few seconds and have lost your mind. It’s as pleasant as people say.
“Good, princess.”
Jungkook is delighted that he pulled it off. Gave you your first orgasm awakening. He could’ve done better and so much more, but with how your chest is heaving, he would have made your heart explode. He’s happy with this for now.
“Aak!” You suddenly scream when you look down, but cover your mouth to not alert outsiders.
Jungkook leans up at attention. “What?”
“S-Sorry. I felt something… Inside. And it scared me,” you mumble. “Can you…?”
Your fingers gently touch the two still lodged inside your entrance. Oh.
“Yeah.” He slowly pulls them out, careful to not hurt you. And then does the final result of Jungkook’s finger fucking show.
A cloudy stream of cum flows from your pussy and forms a small pool on the crotch of Jungkook’s dark jeans near the zipper. He takes it upon himself to spread your lips for the full view, tiny cunt clenching around air.
“Of course you’re a creamer,” he notes, eyes fixated on the juices on his hand.
You pout. “Is that a bad thing…?”
“No.”
Although he enjoys when women squirt, it fits your entire persona and being that you cream. Some cheesy, aesthetic shit like chocolate covered strawberries and whipped cream is very fitting to the way you smell, dress, and look… Even during sex.
Shamelessly, he brings his fingers to his mouth to lick them.
You taste sweeter than last week. Or maybe it’s been too long to remember the exact way you did, so his tastebuds have forgotten. Either way, he wants your cunt in his mouth. Now.
The tension between you and him grows and grows as he leans in like he’s going to kiss you, and with those pillows wet from your essence, you’re begging him to ‘kiss me more, kiss me more’ in your head.
You can smell your scent on his breath when your lips brush, but your excitement is cut short.
Ruined by a beating on the window glass.
“JEON!”
You freeze.
Jungkook lets out an airy chuckle and hangs his head.
“Fucking hell…”
“JEON!” It sounds like a girl. And a mad one, since she bangs some more, her fist shadowing on the fogged window. “I KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE, YOU ASS!”
You frown. “Who is that?”
“Don’t say anything to her,” Jungkook responds, and slides you off his lap. “I don’t know where I threw your panties.”
The banging and yelling continues, and the doorknob is also yanked on. Your blood pressure rushes into defense mode when a nasty thought invades your brain, but you can’t ponder on it for too long. You’re clearly being rushed out of the car, and you’re half naked.
Jungkook looks down on the carpet for your missing undergarment, but something pink catches the corner of your eye. It’s your underwear. Up there on the dashboard.
More banging.
You don’t think you’ll get it on in time, this was already taking too long.
“Forget it,” you tell him, pulling your skirt down. “You want me to stay in the car, or what?”
“No, fuck,” he groans. He easily pushes the passenger seat forward and unlocks the door so he can get out.
The door flings open. All hell breaks loose.
“Oh? Now you open the door?!” The girl yells.
“Giselle,” you hear Jungkook say, and what sounds like scuffling. “Stop.”
“You got a bitch in there?!”
A bitch…?
Oh, god. You roll your eyes, nervousness catching in your throat. Was this his girlfriend? A hookup? You’d forgotten he was a fucking fuckboy. You should’ve expected this if you were going to be around him in public and in general.
What were you thinking? How much of a piece of ass do you look getting fingered in the back of his car at a party. And then to have some chick yelling at him about his endeavors.
You didn’t have time for this. You got your nut. It’s time to make like a man and bounce.
So you slip out of the car after obtaining your wrist wallet from the pocket behind the seat, expecting to make a quick getaway. However, Jungkook was guarding the passenger door and there’s a girl standing in front of him, fuming.
She’s a popular senior that you’ve passed by a few times on campus, two years above you and Jungkook. You never cared to know her real name, but you did know that she was too old to be red in the face over someone like your acquaintance. Unless… this was her man. But Jeon Jungkook didn’t date.
“Is this who’s getting your dick wet now?” She, Gigi, or Giselle, looks you up and down, flips her dark hair, and crosses her arms. “What a downgrade.”
You blink, honestly not fast enough and too confused to respond because you didn’t expect the insult.
“Cut it,” Jungkook firmly states.
“How about you cut your penis off and stop fucking everything you see?” Giselle steps in his face, and it kinda pisses you off that he lets her and just turns his head to tongue his cheek in annoyance. “What’s on your lips? Gloss? And that cum stain and your boner tells me all I need to know, did I interrupt?”
Ew. What a fucking bitch.
Your face scrunches up at her attitude and the way she’s talking to him. It’s degrading and weird. This can’t be his partner. Jungkook is never one to not voice what he has to say or be talked to any kind of way, so you assume her and him have history. But whatever history it is… It damn sure wasn’t healthy.
“J-Jungkook..?” You mumble, grabbing on his arm that’s blocking you to get him to move. Giselle’s eyes snap towards you, and Jungkook presses you back as she steps closer.
“And whoever you are,” Gigi points a French tipped fingernail at you. “Don’t let me catch you again, bitch.”
Was that a threat?
You know that she expects you to be quiet, too, to not retaliate. Probably because you are docile and sweet looking. And she thinks she can run anyone simply because she’s gorgeous and wears nice clothes and has a reputation to uphold. But you don’t do disrespect. Not over dick and balls.
So you step up to that fucking fingernail in your face, holding her eyes.
“Or what?”
She’s stunned. Eyes freezing at the fact that you opened your mouth to talk back.
You were shy, okay. But you weren’t a spineless bitch. Putting your pussy in Jungkook’s face was number one proof.
It’s quiet between the three of you for a second, just the sound of the breeze and university students laughing and talking as they exit the party. Inside Giselle’s head is loud with anger though.
“Princess, in the car.” Jungkook breaks the silence, coercing you to sit down in the passenger seat.
“You’re gonna let her talk to me like that? Really?” Giselle questions behind him. “Jeon. I’m talking to you.”
“There’s nothing to talk about,” you hear him say before he shuts the door. You listen in on their conversation as you let out a breath. “We’re not together. She has nothing to do with what we have going on anyways.”
“Fuck you, Jeon! Seriously!” You hear Giselle yell and watch as Jungkook’s figure crosses in front of the mustang. “You should know that I don’t take disrespect lightly. Not with any of the whores you talk to! Everyone knows that!”
Jungkook simply reacts by shaking his head and opens the driver side door, getting in and revving the car up. He glances over at you. “I’ll take you back to the dorms, okay?”
You take a little while to respond as he pulls off of the grass and through other cars. You were too shocked about whatever that was, upset about how she talked to him and her disgusting first impression on you. Sure, Jungkook wasn’t a saint, but she damn sure wasn’t one either. She was awful, and to be a popular figure at the university… You were glad you kept to yourself.
In other thoughts, Giselle had to have been Jungkook’s ex. Maybe they were on a break, and she was being celibate while he still fucked around. It made the most sense for her to be mad over. Then, he said they weren’t dating, so maybe not.
Sigh. You didn’t know. You didn’t want to know.
“Uhm…” you quietly speak up as he nears your dorm building. “Brandon has my car keys.”
“Why?” Jungkook asks.
“I don’t know, I think he was just playing,” you answer. “Sorry… I should’ve said something before you zoomed out of there.”
“No, it’s fine,” he says. “Get inside. I’ll get your keys and car for you by morning.”
“Jungkook—“
“I’ll get them.”
You close your mouth at his sharp tone, eyes fixating on his tattooed hand gripping the wheel. You hope he will get them smoothly. Too much chaotic shit already happened, and you didn’t want to be at fault for anything else.
“T-Thanks… Be nice about it, please?”
He chuckles, and you light up a little at his mood lightening, despite that altercation a few minutes ago. “You can talk your shit, but I can’t talk mine?”
Please. You were not going to go head-to-head with Giselle over dick. Only if it came down to her hitting you first... However, Jungkook’s a fighter, whether he’s hit first or not, so Brandon should think twice about playing with him.
“Still… be nice. Thanks.”
He nods. “Yeah.”
You awkwardly open the door and get out, grabbing a hold of your wrist wallet. Before you can close it, Jungkook stops you.
“Forgetting something, princess.”
You bend down to see him holding your pink panties out to you.
“Jungkook!” You snatch them, balling them up in your hand and looking around to make sure no one saw. Like you both were doing a drug deal.
“I can keep them up here as a souvenir, if you want.”
“N-No, bye.” You embarrassingly shake your head and close the door, biting your lip as you turn and enter the building. Jungkook’s mustang doesn’t noisily speed off until you swipe your identification card and the door clicks behind you.
You palm you warm cheeks as you ascend up the stairs to your floor.
What a night…
.⋆。⋆༶⋆˙❀༺⋆。⋆༶⋆˙ .⋆。⋆༶⋆˙❀༺ ♥︎ ༶⋆˙ .⋆。⋆༶⋆˙❀༺⋆。⋆༶⋆˙ .⋆ .⋆༶⋆˙❀
🍓⊹。ෆ
Your residential assistant brings you your car keys in the morning, saying that they were left on the office desk without a word but your name. You thank her, going to look out your window to see your car parked across the lot in reverse.
How nice of him.
You wonder how Brandon acted when Jungkook approached him for them. Tsk. Probably tucked his tail and gave them up right away. It secretly annoys you that you couldn’t get them back yourself, but hey, sometimes guys won’t listen until another one makes them. Sad to say.
You jump back into bed after doing your morning routine and pull up your chat with Jungkook. You should thank him. For getting your car keys and bringing your car. Not… for fingering you and giving you your first orgasm. That’s weird. And you shouldn’t pry into his situation with Giselle. That would be weird to ask about, too, when you and him are just acquaintances having fun.
Okay. Let’s forget anything else happened. Be normal.
you: hi. thx for dropping my car off
Send.
Except, it doesn’t. The message is green, and you’ve seen Jungkook’s iPhone that he rarely loses sight of.
What?
No way.
You huff, pretty loudly. Chin plopping down on My Melody’s plush head.
You send another message, a period. To act like you forgot to put it at the end. It’s green. And you’re not getting the option to send it as a text message.
You call, too, the call not going past the first ring.
You’re… blocked?
“Wow…” you mumble, not knowing how to describe your confused emotions…
.⋆。⋆༶⋆˙❀༺⋆。⋆༶⋆˙ .⋆。⋆༶⋆˙❀༺⋆。⋆༶⋆˙ .⋆。⋆༶⋆˙❀༺⋆。⋆༶⋆˙ .⋆ .⋆༶⋆˙❀
♥︎pixieknj 🎀⊹。ෆ
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Bratz Winter Wonderland 🎧❄️ by mini_rooms
240215 - calvin klein on tiktok
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![[48/547] Until We Meet Again, Jungkook](https://64.media.tumblr.com/081e91d13ca92ebbca2fcee2501ea454/0e2087bc8bce1866-c5/s400x600/cc9764a98a95938d99889781cf63d1cc08671725.gif)
![[48/547] Until We Meet Again, Jungkook](https://64.media.tumblr.com/00e52ec775a8fe99a9d57146cd9a5e36/0e2087bc8bce1866-21/s400x600/4d38873154629f6a2a4e59d1b30a108d824d6380.gif)
![[48/547] Until We Meet Again, Jungkook](https://64.media.tumblr.com/fde815ec1943efcff59a972e0b0c2a01/0e2087bc8bce1866-7c/s400x600/615d6ab851b58d0cc4312c2056a62553a717fb69.gif)
![[48/547] Until We Meet Again, Jungkook](https://64.media.tumblr.com/c9cee7f3d2ec6e6672f7a380acc44ab7/0e2087bc8bce1866-7c/s400x600/19a574a5fd744b47088e4b7c372df900f5751950.gif)
[48/547] — until we meet again, jungkook ♡
Love's Remedy ༓ jjk (m) l ch. II
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✑ Summary: Jungkook is a romantic. He comes from a highly intelligent family who wants him to carry out the lineage. Being this way, he goes to college to be a pharmacist but his friends say college isn't just about studying! With a little persuasion, he goes to his first frat party thinking his hat will help him pick up a girl-or woman he means.
Pairing: STEM major!virgin!jungkook x STEM major!hot girl!reader
AU/genre: angst, smut, fluff, s2l, college au, mini-series
Rating: M, 18+
Word Count: 2,783
Warnings: angry koo, jealous koo, gym rat koo, thicc thighs koo, protective koo, kook checks his abs out, koo gets in a physical fight with an aggressive jerk that involves punching, name-calling (half pint, hermit crab, b*tch, Bambi, honeysuckle, kookie), mention of blood (minor), jk is very cute and determined towards oc, oc has philophobia (fear of relationships), oc has poor self-esteem, cussing, bit of crying...sorry lot of warnings this chapter
Now Playing: seven, summertime sadness, she’s kerosene, angels like you+
A/N: Yes, I'm aware this chapter is short, still Jungkook is shirtless in half of this and I am not sorry. This chapter also gets heavy but I hope you enjoy! 💞
<< ch. I ༓ ch. II >> | series masterlist
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A week passes since the frat party and Jungkook hears nothing from you. He's reluctant to accept that you've likely already deleted his number but why else would you be radio silent? Why would someone like you ever be interested in a shy little nerd like him?
He's disappointed but when he gave you his number, it's not like he was expecting anything in return.
Well, he can’t stay hung up on you forever—he'll give you one more week. In the meantime, it’s 5 p.m and he’s off to do his daily lifting at the gym. He read somewhere online that evening is better for building strength, and that is exactly what he intends to do.
With a basic black tank top and gym shorts on, Jungkook scans the expanse of the facility. The place isn’t too crowded being that it’s nearly dinner time but it’s still moderate. He’s hoping Jackson will join him soon, considering they’re buddies now because isn’t that what guy friends do? Workout together?
When he makes his way to the weight room he quickly finds it's packed with guys double his size. Half of them look like they're upperclassmen while the other half is split between first-years like him and a small handful of women. He sheepishly strolls over to an empty pull-up bar, deciding to start with chin lifts.
Jungkook sets his water bottle on the ground, reaches for the handle, and lifts his body up until his chin is level with the bar, legs swing in the air slightly. He then extends his arms back out. The burn in his biceps feels good. He repeats the motion a few more times but has to stop when he hits six.
He takes a big swig of his water, already sweating evident from the tank top sticking to his back. The coolness of the water helps but between his own sweat and the sweat of others around him, Jungkook is tempted to throw his shirt off. Most of the men in the room aren’t wearing any more than shorts anyway so why can’t he?
Jungkook grasps the edges of his tank, pulling it up a little. How did his abs look? Were they good enough to show off? He’s working out diligently since 14 but he was still on the smaller side compared to the rest of his peers.
The mirror to his left helps him get a better look so he shifts his body over. When he does he catches a slight glimpse of a familiar face in the top right corner. Jungkook instantly drops his shirt, whipping his head around.
What were you doing in the weight room? And with some buff guy twice his size closely behind you? All he’s doing is staring at your ass in those tight purple shorts which so happens to have a matching crop top.
Jungkook scowls at the sight.
When you take a seat at one of the bench presses a couple of feet away, his eyes widen. The guy you came with stands behind your head as you lean back. He helps you set the barbell. It’s too far for Jungkook to hear what he’s telling you but he’s convinced it’s nothing good. Whoever this guy is he won’t stop grinning, and you’re grinning back!
You said you don’t do relationships. You said you'd think about going out with him. You said a lot of things but here you are with some guy that looks an awful lot like a boyfriend, how disgusting…
Fuck it.
Jungkook turns his eyes away from you, yanks his tank off, and grabs the pull-up bar again. He’s gonna knock ten of these out in one set.
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Shoulder-width apart, he keeps a steady pace though he makes sure to take deep breaths to prolong his stamina. His eyes fixate on the back wall of the weight room to avoid you and your supposedly new boo from getting in his head.
Apparently, you just didn’t want him. It’s fine. Jungkook exhales. It’s all fine.
After three sets of chin-ups, Jungkook releases himself from the bar to check his phone. He takes another glug of his water too.
Jackson: hey Kook, I was planning to join you at the gym today but I got my family in town tonight. Man, it’s only been a week….can you believe they’re here to visit already?
Jungkook: Wow, all I’ve gotten from my family is a short text saying good luck. They must miss you a lot but yeah, it’s no problem. We can work out another time?
Jackson: You got it bro. Thank you for understanding 🙏🏼 Also, there’s a second thing 😬
Jungkook: ??
Jackson: I might have told my parents about you so are you free to get lunch with us tomorrow? My parents want to meet you. Our treat.
Jungkook: Really? Okay yeah. I’d love to meet them. Time?
Jackson: We don’t know yet but likely 1pm if that’s okay?
Jungkook: Sure, I’ll just be studying so. Text me when you know.
Jackson: I will. How’s the gym?
Jungkook hovers his thumbs over the keyboard. When he glances up to think, he’s reminded of your lingering presence. You’re no longer bench pressing anymore but instead doing a set of bent-over dumbbell rolls. With the way you’re torso’s angled, anyone who’s anyone has a direct view of your rear end. Any decent person would pay it no mind but that same douchebag next to you keeps gawking.
“It’s not meant to be a fucking sex position,” Jungkook mutters and types out a response. “Fucker.”
He makes his way to the black punching bag on the other side of the room, passing a strong glare at that young man as he nears the two of you. He doesn’t know his name but he’d really like to go over there and knee him in the balls. His eyes flicker at you for a moment, so pretty.
“The hell are you staring at my girl for half-pint?” The man calls Jungkook out in an aggressive stance. “Keep your eyes in front before I fuck you up.”
Frazzled, Jungkook scurries to move past the both of you with his head down. “Sorry, I didn’t mean anything.” He doesn’t get three steps before a solid form blocks his path.
“Who are you apologizing to? Your feet? Look me in the damn eye when you talk to me.”
“Jun-ho stop,” you come up beside the man, tugging at his arm. He yanks himself out of the grasp, however, jolting your body back. You nearly lose your balance.
“I’m just trying to teach this little hermit crab what happens when you stare at another man’s woman, baby.”
Jungkook clenches his fists as you struggle to re-stabilize yourself. You should not be with this asshole. He doesn’t deserve you, he doesn’t deserve to be calling you his baby. Who the fuck does he think he is shoving a woman like that.
“Don’t fucking call me that,” you spit. “I’m not your woman. Now leave Jungkook alone. He doesn’t need this.”
Jun-ho gives you a cocky smirk. “Oh? So he’s Jungkook huh? You know him too. You fucking him behind my back or something?” He takes a step towards you. Jungkook lunges forward seeing your obvious discomfort.
“Don’t touch her!” Jungkook stands between you and Jun-ho. He’s shaking so badly but he doesn’t budge. “Take another step and I’ll–I’ll–“
“You’ll pound me in the ground? You and what army? You can’t even talk.” He snorts and moves to toss Jungkook to the side. “Get out of my way.”
Jungkook feels the back of his neck heat with rage, his ears red and burning. There’s no way in hell he’s letting Jun-ho get to you.
“She told you to stop, so why don’t you just–fuck off!” Jungkook shoves Jun-ho back with as much force as he can. His body’s not built and his arm muscles aren’t as ripped but he’s got some big fucking thighs that manage to anchor him to the ground.
“You shit.” Jun-ho grits his teeth and punches Jungkook straight in the gut. Jungkook doubles over in agony. His hand clutches over his abdomen as he groans. You hurry in front of him but you’re thrown to the side by a pair of large hands. “Move bitch,” Jun-ho snaps, eyes bolstered on the smaller man.
“Hey, what the hell is going on over here?” The manager of the gym rushes over to the three of you. He grabs Jungkook and offers him support. “You can’t be doing this young man. You need to leave now.”
Jun-ho shakes his head. “Count yourself lucky this time Jungkook. Could have been a lot worse if it weren’t for this old man getting in the way.” He stares at the manager and then at you. “Come on __.”
“You’re fucking nuts if you think I’m coming with you. I’m staying with Jungkook.”
“No, you’re fucking not.” Jun-ho reaches for your arm until his head is knocked backward by a clean, punch to his jaw. “Fuck! You Fuck!” He holds his jaw, stumbling into a rack of dumbbells behind him.
Jungkook’s knuckles bleed as he holds his own wrist. He winces at the sharp throbbing and stinging from the punch. “Okay no more, no more,” the manager anxiously darts his eyes back and forth between him and Jun-ho. “I want you all out of my facility this instance.”
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After being thrown out of the gym, Jungkook returns to his dorm room. He insists he takes care of his injury himself but it doesn’t sit well with you so you follow him.
“I’m so sorry about this Jungkook. Jun-ho’s a bastard.” You finish wrapping his knuckles in the elastic bandage then lean forward to place your hands on his shoulders. “Promise me you won’t ever do that again.”
Jungkook holds your pleading stare from his seated position. Your soft hands are simultaneously soothing and unsettling. He’s not mad at you for what happened at all. But seeing you with a jerk like Jun-ho when you rejected him, someone who’d never treat his girl like a piece of trash causes all kinds of knots inside him.
“You’re not going to see him again right? Because I can’t make that promise if you do.” His voice is low, nervous that you'll say yes.
Jungkook might not have personal relationship experience but he's witnessed his share of unhealthy relationship dynamics more times he'd like to count.
“Jungkook…” You muster up the best reassuring smile you can and tuck a few loose strands of his hair behind his ear. “Nothing's going to happen between me and Jun-ho anymore. We weren't anything serious. But you care too much about me, I’m not worth the trouble.”
Hearing this, he reaches a hand up to close over yours. “Please don’t say that. Everyone deserves to be cared for and as long as I can help it, I’ll be the first to do it.” His big, doting eyes search into yours. "And good, don't go back to him __. He's not the type of man you need."
"And what type of man do I need Bambi?" You stroke his puffy cheeks and quirk your head to the side inquisitively. Jungkook flinches at the touch.
"Bambi?"
"You didn't like it when I called you baby so, had to come up with something else."
"But." There's that pout again. Jungkook doesn't like being called a baby but when someone reaching this level of adorable, its so hard to shake. "But I just knocked a bitch out for you. How can you keep calling me baby names?"
The chuckle that leaves your lips is heaven to Jungkook's ears. "Aww Jungkook," you coo. "It's 'cause you're a little honeysuckle. So sweet to the taste." His ears perk up at that, gnawing on his bottom lip. "But if you want me to call you something else that might take some more time for me to figure out. Until then do tell me, what do I need?"
"Someone that'll protect you."
"Mhm, okay but—"
"Emotionally, physically, and mentally." Jungkook lists out loud. "That means someone to stand up for you, support you in the ways you need. Someone to help keep losers like Jun-ho out who only look out for themselves." He pauses, contemplating thoughtfully. "You need someone you can trust too. When you're sick you'll be taken care of and he'll never ever cheat on you. Even if you fight, he'll always stick by your side. You'll watch movies together, cuddle under the covers, and stargaze on summer nights. He'll also peel perilla leaves for you and love you until sunrise. Finally, when the time's right he'll ask to marry you, only if you want, of course."
Jungkook waits for you to give him a reply, a little breathless. He notices the distance between you and him somehow got larger. You're now about two feet away from him when you were only mere inches before.
"I'm sorry." He lowers his head. "It's silly I know. Everyone tells me I'm some kind of dreamer boy, just a hopeless romantic."
"It's not silly Jungkook." You soften your expression. "It's a beautiful idea and somewhere out there will gladly share those things with you. You'll live a full life together having all those wonderful experiences."
"Wanna have them with you though." His eyes flicker up at you. "I really like you __."
Oh no, no no no. You push down the pressure building from inside you. "No, I can't. I'm sorry Bambi, I want to but you don't know me." A small tear spills out of the corner of your eye. "I'm not able to....I can't love you like that."
Jungkook gets up from his chair and reaches for your trembling hand. You're tempted to pull back if it weren't for the fact that your hand feels warm in his.
"I can," he says. "I can love you if you let me."
You shake your head, and another hot tear rolls down your face. "Sorry, I don't know why I'm even crying." You quickly wipe your wet cheeks.
"You don't always need a reason. Sometimes it just happens and that's okay. I cry all the time when I'm by myself." Jungkook grabs your other hand slowly. "Just wanna be here for you."
You blink back the remaining tears welling in your eyes. You're embarrassed this is happening at all. Jungkook is the sweetest, most kind-hearted, and most selfless person you know. He shouldn't have to be dealing with any of this.
"If we can't go out, is it okay that we are friends?"
"I don't want to do that to you Kookie."
"Hey, I like that one," he says with a lifted voice.
"You do? I didn't even think about it like the others."
"You were thinking about me?" He bounces in the air a little, at least that's what it looks like to you by the sudden rush of energy Jungkook responds with. He likes knowing you've been paying attention to him, even if only a smidge.
You dart your eyes past him, fingers curling in his hand. "Well I mean..." Jungkook waits intently. "I guess...yes, some."
"Oh please __, please let me take you out. We don't even have to call it a date."
"You're too persistent, you know that?"
"But is it working?"
"I'm not ready yet Jungkook." His shoulders slouch and he opens his mouth to say something though you continue before he can get anything out. "To give you an answer. I'm not ready to give you an answer yet is what I'm trying to say."
"Well, that's okay. You wanna think about it longer? We can four years until graduation."
"You're such a goof, you'd wait that long for an answer?"
Jungkook shakes his head. "No, I'd wait that long for you." He pauses. "Okay maybe I have been watching one too many Korean dramas. Even I threw up in my mouth a little."
Too both share a laugh, this is the weirdest, emotionally exhausting day ever. "Thank you for what you did today with Jung-ho. And for trying to comfort me. Will you possibly be able to wait another week? If it's too long you can tell me. I've made you wait long enough."
"A week from now, let's meet up okay? Or call at least. Even if it's a no, I don't want this to be the last time I get to see or hear you."
"Okay." You nod. "I promise."
And that was the end of that night, as Jungkook walks you to your dorm soon after. It was getting dark out after all.
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A/N: tysm for reading! Lmk what you think and if you wan to be tagged comment/ask 💞
Masterlist
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@hoseokteardrop
no reposting, copying, or translating my work– © kookslastbutton
Jungkook
𝐒𝐞𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐀𝐧𝐱𝐢𝐞𝐭𝐲 | Masterlist
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What do you do when your boyfriend doesn't pay any attention to you?
Tags/Warnings: Game Designer!Jungkook, Brat Tamer!Jungkook, kinda himbo!Jungkook, Non Idol AU, established relationship, Angst [Tags will be different for every part!]
Length: 1k Words
There is no taglist for this fic.
Collab with @euphoricfilter ! 💜
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Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9
Part 10
Part 11
Part 12
Part 13
Part 14
Part 15
Part 16
Part 17
Part 18
Part 19
Part 20
Part 21
Part 22
Part 23
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♥━━━━━━━━━━•.♡.•━━━━━━━━━━━━♥
Additional Content
Christmas Special 🎄
New Year's Special ✨️
???
♥━━━━━━━━━━•.♡.•━━━━━━━━━━━━♥
JUNGKOOK FANFIC RECOMMENDATIONS(4)๑‿︵‿୨
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.⋆。⋆ ༶ ⋆˙⊹ع˖⁺ ⋆ ୭ .⋆。⋆༶⋆˙⊹༺⋆。⋆༶⋆˙⊹.⋆。⋆ ༶ ⋆˙⊹ع˖⁺ ع˖⁺
✿ When She Loved Me | CEO!JK X Reader | One-Shot | @jungkookstatts
✿ Sleepaway | Yandere!JK X Reader | Series | @flowesona
✿ Mine | Jungkook x Demon! Female Reader | One-shot | @playmetheclassics
✿ Your eyes tell | Yandere!JK X Reader | Twins AU | @angellgguk
✿ Noir | Daddy!JK x Little!Reader | @bonny-kookoo
✿ Love Is a Game: For Political Enemies | JK X Reader | @lleldey
✿ petals with luv | Emporer!Jungkook x PalaceWoman!Reader | Hanahaki AU | @hisunshiine
✿ a lover’s bond | jungkook x female reader | greek mythology! AU | @latetaektalk
✿ love in the dark | Ceo!JK X Reader | One-Shot | @spideyjimin
✿ Like I’m Famous | Idol!JK X Reader | One-Shot | long distance au | @softyoongiionly
✿ I’ll Be Home for Christmas | Pilot Jungkook x female OC | One-Shot | @bluewhale52
✿ Falling | jungkook x female reader | Soulmate AU | @starshapedkookie
✿ Pick Your Fighter | gamer!jk X gamer!reader | @jikookiekosmos
✿ angels like you | Jungkook X Reader | S2L | One-Shot | @aquagustd
✿ Killing me softly with his touch | JK X Reader | One-Shot | @borathae
✿ Bad Man | Badboy!JK X Reader | @bonny-kookoo
✿ The Monster in the Dark | yandere!sleep paralysisdemon!jjk X fem!Reader | One-Shot | @themochiverse
✿ S O U L M A T E S | Crackhead!Jk X Reader | Series | @smaubts
✿ bad romance | badboy!jungkook x goodgirl!reader | One-Shot | @noteguk
✿ No Guardian Angel | The Crow!Jungkook X Reader | @jiminstonic
✿ Love Letters | Prince!Jungkook × Maid!Reader | @bonny-kookoo
✿ LESSON I | YandereTeacher!jungkook x bully student fem!reader | Three-Shot | @redsaurrce
✿ RED | demon!jk x fem!reader | Series | @armpirate
✿ Follow the White Rabbit | idol! jungkook x idol! reader | @youthguk
✿ Numb to The Feeling | Dark! Shitty! Yandere! Jeon Jungkook x Fem!Reader | One-Shot | @pynkgothicka
✿ Delivery Date | pizzadeliveryboy!jungkook x reader | One-Shot | @dntaewithluv
✿ Who is in control? | jk x reader | Drabble AU | @ctrlsht
✿ sweetest apparition | nerd!jungkook x popular!female reader | @jeonfiles
✿ m y s t r a n g e a d d i c t i o n | professor!jk X student!Reader | One-Shot | @joonberriess
✿ to err is to love | dilf!jk /ex husband!jk / ceo!jk x afab reader | Series | @jungkookschin
✿ polarity | BestFriendBF!JK X Reader | Series | @darkestcorners
✿ KILL TO KISS YOU | Yandere!Jungkook x Prostitute!Reader | One-Shot | @chummywchimmy
✿ Ode To The Nature Of Romance | Jungkook x Reader | @yeoldontknow
✿ Cabin in The Woods | Werewolf!Jungkook x Human!Reader | One-Shot | @girl8890
✿ Nothing was gonna stop me | Jeon Jungkook x Reader | One-Shot | @wildestdreamsblog
✿ Teacher’s Pet | professor/dilf!jungkook x student!reader | Series | @axigailxo
✿ prima nocta | king!jungkook, virgin!reader | royalty au | One-Shot | @yoon2k
✿ End of Time | Jungkook x Reader | Series | @deepdarkdelights
✿ 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬 | Yandere!JK X Reader | @euphoricfilter
✿ Paint | painter!jungkookxassistant!reader | @hongjoongscafe
✿ 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆 & 𝑷𝒆𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒔 | environmentalist! jungkook x college student! reader | @miraclesatnightfall
✿ The Broken Vow | Husband!JK X Reader | One-Shot | @lleldey
✿ Euphoria | bad boy jungkook x librarian yn | @btsydtrash
✿ White Pearl | CEO Sugar daddy Jungkook x stripper sugar baby reader | @lovelyspring7
✿ just a little bit of your heart | JK X Reader | @chemicalpink
✿ imminent danger | jungkook x reader | @whatifyoulivelikethat
✿ Knockout | boxer!dad!jungkook x pregnant!reader | Drabble | @jvngkook97
✿ Please Love Me! | Frat President Jungkook x Succubus Reader | @icedmatchatae
✿ The Boyfriend Experience | Escort!Jungkook x Fem!Reader | @shina913
.⋆。⋆ ༶ ⋆˙⊹ع˖⁺ ☁⋆ ୭ .⋆。⋆༶⋆˙⊹༺⋆。⋆༶⋆˙⊹.⋆。⋆ ༶ ⋆˙⊹ع˖⁺
OTHER POSTS:
JUNGKOOK FANFIC RECOMMENDATION(1)
JUNGKOOK FANFIC RECOMMENDATION(2)
JUNGKOOK FANFIC RECOMMENDATIONS(3)
ALL BTS MEMBERS WATTPAD RECOMMENDATIONS(1)
BTS X READER WATTPAD RECOMMENDATIONS(2)
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°ཐི♡̵̼͓̥͒̾͘ཋྀ°
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°ཐི♡̵̼͓̥͒̾͘ཋྀ°
False Pretenses
fwb!Jungkook x Reader
Summary: Just how fair does the ‘benefits’ aspect between Friends with Benefits actually extend? Based on this meme.
Word Count: 1.5k
Warnings: crack to fluff, suggestive moments and ending, swearing, Jk has side by side washer/dryer units cause it’s funnier, reader’s referred to as ‘Ma’am’, not proofread
A/N: Thanks to the lovely anon who requested this! Sorry it took me soo long to get to, I hope you’ll still like it tho! (I’ll also be posting a couple more pieces with this pairing in the next couple weeks, so keep your eyes peeled if you liked this)
Masterlist
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It was the type of text you had gotten more than used to receiving from him over the past few months, smirking down at your phone as you waited for the elevator in his building.
“Need you so bad rn. Come over?❤”
The heart was a new addition, he must be feeling particularly needy today, you thought to yourself as the elevator doors finally opened.
Since the two of you had established this new part of your friendship, it was rare for you to go more than four or five days without receiving some variation of the same short message from him.
You were still slightly surprised by his text, seeing as you had only been over the night before, but you weren’t complaining by any means. Though you may have enjoyed pretending that Jungkook was the needier one in your arrangement, if you were completely honest, you were just as affected by him, finding yourself missing him on the nights you didn’t spend together.
When he opened the door, you noticed he looked a little more disheveled than usual, his hair sticking up all over the place, as if he’d been running his hands through it, a habit you knew he did when he was stressed.
“You got here fast.” He noted, letting you into the apartment.
“Well, your text made it sound kinda urgent, didn’t want to leave you waiting too long.” You said, wandering through into the living room, slowing to a stop as you caught sight of the chaotic state of the space, cleaning supplies and laundry scattered around, furniture moved all out of place.
“What happened in here?” You asked, turning back to Jungkook, who was now avoiding your eyes. “Koo?”
“I lied, I didn’t want sex.” He said guiltily, looking up at you. “I need you to help me clean.”
“I-, what?” You blinked at him, unsure if you heard him correctly.
He slumped back against the counter, looking stressed as he ran his hand through his hair again. ”My parents decided to surprise me by announcing they’re coming to visit tomorrow, but I’ve done nothing but sleep since I got home from tour last week, so the house is a fucking mess and everything’s a disaster and I need help, please.” He pleaded, staring at you.
You immediately began pulling your coat back on, turning back towards the door. “You’re unbelievable.”
“Y/n, please!” He quickly followed after you, catching your sleeve. “I’ll do anything you want! I’ll buy you dinner, I’ll rub your back, I’ll even let you pick what we watch for a month!”
You paused, turning to look back at him with a raised brow. “Even if I want to re-watch ‘Our Beloved Summer’ for a third time?”
He bit lip, trying to fight back a pained grimace before nodding slowly. “Whatever you want.”
You stared at him for a long moment.
“Fine.” You said reluctantly, caving as you saw the genuine desperation in his eyes. You could never say no to him.
“Thank you!” He sang, catching you in a tight hug and spinning you around in a circle. “I promise I’ll make it up to you!”
“Yeah, whatever,” You grumbled as he set you back on your feet. “Where do we start?”
“Laundry room?” He offered. “It’s mostly done, I just need to vacuum behind the machines.”
Do you really think your mom’s gonna look back there?” You raised a brow, following him down the hall.
“She’s very thorough.” He said seriously.
“Fair enough.” You shrugged. “I don’t quite see why I’m necessary for this part though?”
“I was afraid if I tried to clean back there by myself, I’d slip and get stuck or die.”
“So you want me to slip and die behind your washer instead?” You shot him an accusatory look.
“No! I’ll hold onto you and keep you safe,” He smiled reassuringly. “You know, like the buddy system.”
“I thought the buddy system was for camping so you didn’t get lost or eaten by bears?”
“It’s a multi-purpose system!” He said, his earlier agitation starting to flare up again at your teasing. “Are you gonna help me or not?”
“Yeah, I’ll do it, pass me the vacuum.” You relented, boosting yourself up on top of the dryer.
He held onto your hips to keep you balanced as you cleaned, his mind beginning to wander as he stared at your ass, his fingers starting to slowly knead your flesh absent-mindedly.
“Koo.” You warned, shooting him a quick look.
“Right, sorry.” He snapped back to attention, ceasing his movements and focusing back on the task at hand.
You finished up quickly, passing the vacuum attachment back to him and letting him help you down.
“Thank you.” He said.
“You’re welcome.” You answered, looking around expectantly. “What’s next?”
The apartment wasn’t nearly as bad of a mess as he claimed it to be, but it still took both of you several hours of work to get everything back in order, finishing off with laundry and changing all the bedding.
“Why are these sticky?!” You asked, mildly horrified as you helped him strip the sheets off his bed.
“Relax, it’s just caramel sauce.” He said.
You looked up at him confused. “We didn’t use-?”
“No no, that was just me,” He explained quickly. “I had ice cream last night.”
“Without me?!” You said, clutching your chest in feign hurt, making him roll his eyes as he let out a huff of laughter.
“I’ll add that to the list of things I need to make up for, okay?” He said.
“Eh, it’s better than where my mind went.” You said, only half joking as you grabbed the fresh sheets from him and turned back to the bed. “Almost thought you were fucking around behind my back for a second there.”
Facing away from him, you missed the way his expression suddenly turned serious as he looked at you. “I would never.”
It was strange, despite the supposedly ‘casual’ nature of your arrangement, you both found yourselves making little comments like that, words and exchanges that sounded a lot more like things said between a committed couple, rather than just two friends helping each other out till you found something more serious.
“Alright, I think that’s everything.” You said, snapping him out of his thoughts. You had finished making up the bed, even turning down the covers for him.
“Thank you, y/n.” He said gratefully. “I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.”
“Probably called Hobi.” You smirked, making him snort.
“Now, you promised me food, and if you lie to me twice in the same day, I’m dumping your ass.” You said, earning another laugh from him.
“Alright, whatever you want, just like I said.” He said, leaning down to give you a quick kiss.
“Although, if you wanted, I could make up for my false pretenses from earlier in a different way?” He offered, eyes darkening slightly as his hands drifted over your hips
You lightly shoved his hands away. “Not a chance, Loverboy, I’m way too tired now. You’ll have to try and ‘make it up to me’ some other time.”
“How about tomorrow?” He said, eyes twinkling mischievously, looping his arms around your waist instead to keep you close.
“I thought your parents were coming over tomorrow?” You reminded, raising a brow at him.
“You could come over after.” He suggested. “Hell, you could even come to dinner with us, my parents like getting to meet my friends.”
“Friends?” You looked up at him skeptically.
“Yeah, what?” He laughed, squeezing you lightly.
“Do you let your other friends suck your di-?”
“They don’t need to know the details of our relationship!” He said quickly, his face flushing slightly, making you snicker. “You’re still my friend, one of my best friends actually.” He added, in a soft tone.
The way he said it made your heart twist in a weird way, though you didn’t quite understand why.
“So?” He asked, staring down at you hopefully. “Will you come?”
You chewed your lip, considering. It felt like a really big commitment to meet his family, regardless of what your relationship was, but you tell it would mean a lot to him if you said yes.
“I’ll think about it.” You said finally.
He beamed.
“Thank you!” He said, leaning in to kiss you again, his lips lingering longer this time, tracing over yours lightly, making you shiver.
You pressed closer to him, hooking your arms around his neck as you tilted your head to deepen the kiss, letting your tongue delve into his mouth as his hands grip on your waist tightened.
When you pulled back for air, his pupils were blown wide, eyes almost black as he stared down at you, breathing heavily.
“Take your shirt off.” You ordered, your breaths equally unsteady.
“But I thought you said-?”
“I changed my mind.” You cut him off, tugging at the fabric impatiently. “Shirt off, now.”
“Yes, Ma’am.”
Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @feminympho @a-gayish-unicorn
To Give a Helping Hand | jjk
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☆summary: when Jungkook comes home from the gym, he goes feral thinking about you.
☆pairing: idol!Jungkook x female reader
☆rating: 18+ (minors DNI)
☆genre: smut, idol!au
☆warnings: unedited, curses, explicit content: masturbation. that's it, that's the whole thing. Cumshot on his hand tattoos. Jungkook is hella horny for reader and jerks off thinking about her - fantasies of oral sex (male and female receiving), of unprotected sex, of rough sex, of hickeys and marking (scratches on the back), of shower sex, of spanking, of choking, of creampies, of clit play, of fingering and squirting. Multiple orgasms, lowkey pain kink and praise kink (let me know if I forgot something)
☆word count: 1.8k (I think it's the shortest thing I've ever written on here lmao)
☆a/n: pure unedited sins bc mr jeon jungkook makes me horny despite being in the army. hope this doesn't disappoint lmaooo thank you to @wintaerbaer for her help with the banner (it would have been a horrible mess without your guidance) and for encouraging me to write this!! love you Ari <3333
☆☆☆☆☆
You’re driving him insane.
You. Are. Driving. Him. Insane.
Insane.
Every time Jungkook sees you at the gym, he goes insane. Completely, utterly, insane. He thinks there has to be a better word in the dictionary to describe what you do to him but, alas, he can’t find it.
So insane it is, and he tries to live up to the name.
He’s been home for five minutes, and he’s already in his bed, dick so hard he thinks it’ll explode. Because of course you had to be doing squats today, in those way too tight biker shorts that leave nothing to the imagination. Your thick ass, stretching the fabric so much he thinks he spied a thong underneath…
Jungkook grunts, hiding his eyes behind his arm, trying to erase the picture from his mind. But he can’t. You’re everywhere – behind his closed eyelids, or a ghost in his room when he opens his eyes again.
It’s been that way since the very first day he saw you at the gym. Jungkook caught sight of you and immediately had a boner, which hadn’t happened to him since he was a teenager. He’s a grown man, for fuck’s sake, yet the sight of you turns him on far more than anything ever has.
You’re just… perfect. Too hot, your body perfectly sculpted by the hours you spend at the gym every week. Jungkook dreams of dragging his hands, his tongue, on every inch of your body. Of caressing your hard-earned muscles, of gripping the meat of your ass…
Of grinding into you and hearing the little breathy moans he’s sure that you make in the thralls of passion.
Fuck.
If he’s honest, he would have fucked you that first time. Would have approached you and charmed you, seduced you until he’d have you writhing under his body. But one look – one damn look – at your keychain, and he knew you were off limits.
The bright pink Kooky plushie hanging from the keychain was a firm reminder that he cannot approach you, ever. Indeed, he doesn’t mix pleasure with work, which is starting to prove increasingly hard as he gets more famous, and as his fans grow way too numerous.
As his fans, as you pretend that you don’t recognize him when you go to the gym, even though he catches you looking at him all the time. Yet he can’t approach you, won’t approach you, ever. But nothing stops him from exploring his dirty little fantasies, whenever he wraps his hand around his cock…
Jungkook grunts, and he decides to take manners into his own hands, literally. He wishes it’d be your hand, gripping his cock once he’s pushed his shorts and underwear down. Wishes you’d hold him tight as you’d jerk him off slowly, eyes never leaving his.
He imagines you taking him in your mouth. Your plump lips, wrapping around the tip of his cock, sucking once as he’d fist your hair, restraining himself from thrusting in your mouth. Or maybe you’d give him the go to fuck your mouth, to unleash himself on you…
Jungkook moans, and he jerks himself off, slowly. Eyes closed as he imagines everything he wants you to do to him, everything he wants to do to you. His hand is not nearly enough to pleasure him, not when he’s been craving you the way that he has…
But it’ll make do.
Spitting in his other hand, Jungkook holds his dick up to rub the natural lube on the head of his cock. He winces – he’s already so damn sensitive… Probably because he’s sported a semi since he saw you at the gym.
Who gave you the right to go to the gym in those shorts, with only a sports bra to pair with them? You looked devilish, downright sinful, and you’ve dragged him to hell.
Once his dick is lubed up, glistening in the dim light from the hallway because he sure as hell didn’t have time to turn the lights on in his room, Jungkook strokes himself, slowly. Tattooed fingers firmly wrapped around his cock, just the way he likes it – right under the tip, hard enough to hurt just a little bit.
Hard enough to make him wish he was fucking your tight pussy instead. He imagines the drag of your walls on his dick, on his veins and on the ridge of his tip. He imagines your breasts bouncing up and down as you’d ride him, and then your face, contorted in pleasure, as he’d jackhammer into you.
He’s had noise complaints from his neighbours once, because of the loud singing he does once in a while, when he goes live for his fans. Right now, he wishes he’d get a noise complaint because they’d hear him fucking you good, fucking you until you’d crumble into ecstasy.
He picks up the pace on his dick, free hand grabbing at the white sheet of his bed. Would you be the type to moan unabashedly loud? To say his name when you come, when your walls flutter on his dick?
The thought makes his dick twitch in his hand, and Jungkook grunts again, curses underneath his breath. He doesn’t even know your name, but he sure as hell knows he’d come with your name a litany on his lips, a sinful melody he’d sing just for you to hear.
Would you drag your nails on his back, marking him so that the world knows you’re his? Would you suck on his neck, leave hickeys behind that he’d have to hide under foundation? Would you beg for him, or would you be a brat?
He wants you to be a brat. He wants to have to put you back into your place, to spank your ass and choke you until all you know is his name. He’d be feral with you – he’s feral just thinking about you. And maybe one day he’ll betray his number one rule, maybe one day he’ll fuck you into the night, hear you cry with pleasure as he’d pump his load inside of you…
His imagination is running wild, and his pace on his dick is relentless, unforgiving. His bicep burns already, even though he’s barely started. Or maybe he’s just too lost in his fantasies, losing track of time. But he doesn’t care – he’d lose track of time fucking you, too.
“Fuck,” he moans, eyes closed tightly, eyebrows bunched together as if in pain. But he’s not hurting – he feels way too good, the pleasure running through his blood a symphony every cell inside of him is addicted to.
You’re just too beautiful to him. He’d fucking crawl on his knees for you, or maybe he’d make you crawl. He’d force you to crawl, to beg for him, to…
Jungkook grunts loudly, his orgasm hitting so hard it feels like a trainwreck. He doesn’t slow down his pace on his dick right away, letting his cum spurt out and drip on his fingers, on the back of his hand. He doesn’t even care if he makes a mess – he’s lost to his pleasure, and he doesn’t want to come back to sanity. He wants to stay insane, and so he drags his orgasm out, milks it out of himself.
And he comes a lot, painting his whole fucking hand white. He’d think it to be disgusting, but when he looks down at his hand, fuzzy from his blissed-out pupils, he sees that he’s covered his tattoos with cum. His army tattoo – the closest he’ll get to come on you. He curses at the sight, hates that it’s turning him on again and that his dick twitches, begging for more. But all he does is watch the cum – it covers the three first letters, but it’s slowly dripping towards the y, and soon the whole tattoo will be covered, like he fucking wishes your pussy would be covered with his cum, dripping with it. He’d finger you with you.
Fucking hell.
Jungkook gives in to the unrelenting desire once he’s in the shower, trying to clean himself. A single thought of your thick ass and the stretched fabric of your biker shorts sends him back to square one, and he jerks himself off again, fast and hard, his free hand leaning on the wall. He’s quick to shift and put his forearm against the wall instead, hiding his face in his arm. And then he imagines fucking you in this shower, taking you from behind as your ass cheeks shake from his ministrations. He imagines you trying to find purchase on the wall, your hands slipping until he pulls you back into his chest. He’d hold you tight, wrap a hand around your neck, and he’d find your clit with his other hand.
He’d make you come so fucking hard. All night long. He doesn’t think he’d let you even fucking walk out of his apartment. He’d fuck you seven days a week, wouldn’t even leave his bed.
This time, his release hits differently, not as strong. It still fills his blood with ecstasy, and his head swims as he watches his cum go down the drain. His hand, his tattoos, are mostly clean this time around, and he imagines them covered in your cum instead. In your sleek juices as he’d finger you, making you squirt everywhere…
He curses loudly, turning the shower to cold, immediately wincing as the water hits his back. But it’s the only way he thinks he’ll manage to chase his arousal away. Hell, he doesn’t want to spend the rest of his fucking evening masturbating. Though it’d be worth it, and he’s fully aware that he’d be able to. He’d just need to think of you, and he’d be ready to go again.
But when he steps out of the shower, he decides otherwise. He decides to go live – are you watching him, from wherever it is that you live in this city? Do you know that you make him insane, so, so insane that he just came twice to the thought of you?
He smirks, watching the comments coming in even though he hasn’t said anything yet. They fly too fast for him to be able to read anything, but he knows.
He knows that you’re there, on the other side of the screen, watching him as he watches you. Where else would you be?
And he knows damn well that next time he’ll see you, he’ll talk to you. Fuck the rules, fuck the fact that you’re his fan. He needs to fuck you, to know what your pussy taste like and how you sound when you come.
So next time he sees you, instead of jerking himself off alone, Jungkook knows he’ll ask you to give a helping hand.
☆☆☆☆☆
Welcome to the land of sinning lmao hope you enjoyed this short ride! Let me know what you thought - it always motivates me to write more stuff like this ;)
All rights reserved to @/oddinary4bts, 2024. Do not copy, repost or translate.
✧˖ ?! — DRIVING SERVICES. - (SUGGESTIVE)
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— ‧₊˚ — 🏍 : "y'know you're pretty ungrateful for a person who gets hopped off and picked up to and from work everyday by no other then me.. "??
summary. your boyfriend driving both of y'all a lil carelessly, turns into a bickering sesh which turns into him accussing you of not repaying him enough for his 'driving services' - well oh how wrong he is and how could you prove just that??
notes. FINALLYYY BACK!!!! (it's been ten days but we move), i'm finished with exams FOR NOW and the rest of the week and the next one i'm pretty much free and i rly feel like writing again!! hope you enjoy <3<3
warnings/includes. non idol? jungkook x f! reader, established relationship, motorcycling background (duh), they're so bickering i love 'em!! (they're a lil mean to eachother but lovingly), blatant flirting, 'brat' + 'bending over' mentioned
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"why can you never just be happy? always have to insult me tsk tsk" jungkook shook his head dramatically, taking of the black dome, running his tattoed hand through his luscious hair somehow managing to make it look straight out of a shampoo ad.
"cause you drive like a fucking maniac, do you even see yourself when you take sharp turns?" he turns around fully, lips parted, eyes wide, making that lil noise of surpise and faint amusement that's a mix of a grunt and an intake of breath as he rolls his eyes when you added: "i see the gates of heaven the second your hands touch the hand clutch"
he opens his mouth and closes it instantly after, a small teny tiny grin on his face, hands slapping the motorcycle seat lovingly like trying to underline his point, "y'know you're pretty ungrateful for a person who gets hopped off and picked up to and from work everyday by no other then me and.... her" he slaps the motorcycle gently once more, raising his eyesbrows, piercings moving slightly - like trying to silently mimick 'you wish that was you huh'
"are you really trying to make me jealous with a motorcycle?" you can't even hide the smile that sneaks its way onto your face, looking into his face, his own lips not quite settling themselves.
"my point still stands- you should repay me more often... for my immaculate driving services" the immediate shift closer to you almost remarkable, his arms pushing through, hands settling on the motorcycle back right behind you- basically trapping you.
his eyes now being the ones not knowing where to settle, moving from your eyes to your lips and back to your eyes the second he notices you noticing his tiny dilemma he let out a overly dramatic sigh, like completly careless and unbothered.
"oh i think i'm treating you just fine and i think i'm just grateful enough considering the fact that your driving services are..... best case scenario questionable"
he furrowed his brows, one hand immediately finding his own heart acting like he just got shot, "ouch, you additionaly hurt my feelings each day"
he pauses, looking around the parking lot not far from your apartment, "you act like a brat a little to much sometimes"
you mindlessly toy with the incredibly lose tie around his neck, not failing to hold eye contact, taking your sweet time with responding, "i think that's just what you like actually, you're not even really mad at me rn"
his tongue that was just playing with his lips piercing paused, lips forming into a knowing smirk - you got him all figured out "what makes you believe in that theory?"
"if you actually were, you would've had me bent over the bike already but you don't-" he cut you off straight away, hands beginning to lazily run through your hair, feeling the thin strands between his fingers, "i never even told you why i drive a tiny tiny little bit carelessly sometimes- my mind is just always filled with the things we could do, it's so hard being me"
you rolled your eyes once more, pushing him away from you jokingly, "i wish i had even just a piece of the confidence you have"
he took your hand, instantly walking ahead of you basically pulling you from behind him out the parking lot, making that 'tsk tsk' sound once more, "i'm still considering the bending over by the way-"
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some biking terms explained (i googled them all pls correct me if wrong):
'dome' — biker slang for motorcycling helmet 'hand clutch' — basically the steering wheel of a motorcycle
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୧⠀♡⠀୨ porcelain eyes ୧⠀♡⠀୨
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Mariah Carey's house tour for Glamour magazine (2007)
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🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠
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look at jungkook boxing with sprout hair 🥺
bitchin’ || (M)
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↳ PART OF MY REWIND SERIES
The 80s were a time of choices. Which perm was right for you? What color neon would you wear next? None of these choices, however, were more questionable than a certain deal you made with Jeon Jungkook.
pairing: fratboy!jungkook x reader
word count: 4.8k
genre: 1980s au, eventual smut, e2l
warnings: multiple smut scenes, science talk, banter, jealousy, alcohol & LOTS of colorful 80s slang lmao
A/N: Bitchin’ is a multichapter fic, surprise!! This fic was inspired by To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before. Thank you to @junqkook for letting me use her likeness and helping me with Yara’s character overall.
01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10
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PART ONE
12:16 pm.
The time on the clock was glaring at you, a silent caution that today’s lab was going to totally suck.
You could feel irritation start to eat away at you. You and your best friend, Yara, had a deal. She would show up to the dissection today and, in exchange, you would gladly do all the work. But given that class would start in four minutes, you had a sneaking suspicion that Yara was going to in fact skip class after all.
You let your chin sink down into the comfort of your open palm, eyes flickering once again towards the black and white clock that was perched up above the classroom’s blackboard. Usually, you could hear each small tick of time, but seeing as this lab was more exciting, every student in the room was currently chatting amongst their peers, covering the clock’s sound.
You considered for a moment making conversation with your professor. That idea was quickly squashed once you realized that he too was preoccupied – his attention set on the clock as well, allowing the minute hand to make its final journey before beginning the class.
Suddenly, you realized that not only had Yara left you alone, but she had also left you without a partner to do the dissection. You glanced around the room, frowning as you saw that every other table was evenly numbered, meaning you would be forced to join a random pair to make a group of three.
Wicked.
“Good afternoon, everyone.” Mr. Kim began, pausing to take a swig from his coffee mug. “I hope everyone read the email I sent out yesterday in regards to proper attire. If anyone isn’t wearing actual shoes, then I suggest you beat it unless you’re particularly amped at the idea of losing a toe when someone accidentally drops their scalpel.”
A few isolated giggles rang out, but no one made any move to leave.
“No one? Radical. Feet are gross anyway–”
The sound of the classroom door suddenly being pushed open stole away everyone’s attention. The late boy that walked in froze momentarily, clearly not expecting all eyes to fall onto him, but quickly regained his composure as he flashed a smile.
Keep reading
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shushucherry ‘hime holiday’ collection ♡︎