I Have A Few Fics To Be Posted But I Haven't Posted Recently Because I'm Learning How To Juggle And I

I have a few fics to be posted but I haven't posted recently because I'm learning how to juggle and i need both of my hands for that so

'AFTER DARK' - M.S

Synopsis - “But… why do you hate that you like it?” "Because I'm supposed to hate you! And I can't do that when I'm in love with you!"

Warnings! - Profanity, kissing, arguing, Nick and Chris r kinda asses, use of Y/N, crying, name calling (not directly though), crying.

A/N - I was listening to 'After Dark' and I thought about something I had written down but lost but I still remember the plot. This is so long😭 Although, please enjoy ! ♡

You and Matt had been at each other's throats since you guys met.

He'd say one thing and it would lead to either a small banter or an actual yelling match. But with you two, it was unpredictable what was going to happen.

Lately you two have been a little more smiley with each other, still bantering a lot, but sometimes playfully.

----

Matt was in his room, and I'm sitting in the living room, watching the same show I had on when Nick and Chris went out to eat with Madi and Laura.

Soon enough, I got bored and paused the episode and walk to Matt's room.

He doesn't look up from his phone but sighs.

"Get out."

I just shake my head and plop down in his chair at his desk, drumming my fingers on the arms of it lightly.

"Nah. I'm bored."

He groans. “Why are you in my room?”

"Entertainment? I guess." I sigh and shrug.

"I got bored in the living room by myself. Nick and Chris went out to dinner with Madi and Laura and left me here."

“So, they just… left you here?” His eyes widen a little. He puts his phone down on his bed next to him.

I shrug and look down at his desk at the keyboard and little pieces of candy wrapper trash. 

"I guess. "

"Well, why didn't you with them?"

I shrug again and cross my arms on the desk, avoiding messing up his keyboard.

"Just, wasn't in the social mood."

I'm thankful he can't see me right now. Even when I walked in, he never looked at me. Thank God. I feel like I look absolutely terrible. I feel exhausted and drained. I have no real reason to feel this way, but I guess emotions are just difficult.

I hear him sigh and hear the small 'thunk' of his head pressing against the headboard.

"Whay are you still here? You need something?"

I just shrug again, knowing he can't see me.

"Not really. Just don't want to be alone I guess."

I lay my head on my arms, closing my eyes. Laying my head down like you would on a desk at school.

"Well, what do you want me to do? Entertain you?" Matt's voice rings from behind the chair.

"I'm not expecting anything. I just didn't want to be alone. Is that such a hard thing to understand?" My voice firm and muffled by the way my face is buried in my arms.

I know I can't see him, but I can hear the eye roll in his voice.

"Why can't you just get out? Find something else to do other than be a fucking bug." He grumbles the last part, but I can hear it clearly.

I sigh frustratedly and stand up from the chair walking to his door. 

"Fine. I'll just go fuck myself then." I grumble as I swing the door open and walk out of it, out of his room. Just like he wanted.

He puts up his hands in disbelief and just stares after you. Once you leave, he sits up, and buries his head back into his hands. He sighs a little louder, and his voice is more strained.

“Stupid…” he mutters.

-

I walk back into the living room, plopping down on the chase and curling up in one of the many blankets that are strewn across the length of the couch and grab my phone.

I open up Instagram and start to go through everyone's stories, just to get everything out of the way. I click onto Nick's story and see a picture of not just him, Chris, Madi and Laura. But of all of my friends. And that hits deep.

I scrub a hand over my face with a sigh before clicking off of the story and closing out Instagram entirely.

For some reason, I feel sad knowing that I'm not there.

I feel my breathing pick up slightly and tears well in my eyes. I tighten my grip on my phone, my knuckles white, and close my eyes for a second, making the tears fall down my face.

My mind drifts back to the only other person in the house. The same person I have a love/hate relationship with.

After a few minutes of playing some weird iOS game, I hear footsteps coming from Matt's room. Then I feel the couch behind me sink.

He doesn't say a word. Just sits there.

I immediately notice his presence but decide to ignore it until I can't. My back is turned to him.

 "What do you want?" I grumble, not turning around or turning my head to look at him.

He puts his head on the back of the couch. His shoulders are slouched, and his expression is… blank.

“I don’t know, I felt bad.”

I snort softly at his words.

"Since when do you feel bad for me? Yeah right." I mumble the last part to myself.

His eyes narrow a little. I can tell he heard me, but it's all silent for a few moments.

"It was rude that they just left you here." He shrugs, and his tone is... a little less rude than his normal snarky and sharp one.

"Yeah, well it's fine. I don't mind." I mutter and sniffle to clear my stuffy nose from crying.

He tilts his head to the side, looking at the back of your head.

“Do you have a cold, or something?”

"Oh, yeah. No, I'm fine." I keep my back turned to him, but I drop my phone and use the sleeve of my zip-up to wipe my nose and cheeks.

“Are you sure? Cause it kinda looks like you’re crying.” His voice is a little gentler than I'm used to hearing.

"I'm fine, Matt." My voice firmer and a bit louder than I was speaking.

He notices the change in tone, and he sounds a little sterner.

“You know, this is exactly why we can't be friends. You won't tell me what's going on when I ask, and then you get all defensive and mean when I do notice that something's wrong.” He crosses his arms tight, and he looks forward again.

"Well, maybe I don't tell you because you're usually the reason why." I sniffle again and try to breathe through the upcoming wave of emotions. My voice cracking slightly.

His eyes widening a little and he looks at you, his expression soft with regret.

"Am I the one who made you cry?"

His eyes stay soft, and he looks really concerned.

I sigh and shake my head, picking up my phone and pulling up the photo of Nick and the others.

"Not this time." I exhale sharply. My voice quieter than my previous tone and strained from me trying not to cry again.

He looks at you for a few more moments, and his face softens even more.

“What happened..?” He speaks as gently as he can.

I reach my phone out with a photo from Nick's story of him, Chris, Madi, Laura, Sab, Ari, and Oliver sitting at a table with big smiles on their faces.

I feel him grab the phone from my hand and presumably try to look at it better.

He looks at the phone screen, then looks back at you.

“They didn’t invite you?..”

I sit up on the couch, moving to a sitting position instead of laying and kick the blanket off me.

I chuckle dryly.

"And what's worse... is that it's my birthday today. I mean, I don't usually celebrate it but, it's my birthday and all of my friends are out without me." I bring my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs and rest my chin on my kneecaps.

His head snaps up to my face, his brows low.

"Wait, it's your birthday...? And you're alone?"

I sniffle and rub my eyes. 

"Like I said, I don't mind anymore. But I just go so overwhelmed earlier when you told me to leave your room, I just started crying and my mind drifted back to that whole fact and I just-" I just sigh and put my forehead on my knees while closing my eyes, shaking my head softly.

His eyebrows raise.

“You don’t… mind being alone on your birthday?” His expression softens a bit when he watches you put your head on your knees.

I just shrug again and breathe in through my nose sharply.

"Wouldn't be the first time." I mumble to myself but instantly realizing Matt heard it.

His voice is a little softer, and he sounds concerned?

“Why are you so okay with being alone? Is it a defense mechanism or…?” He just looks at me, waiting for an answer.

"I never really got much attention as a kid. I was basically forced into isolation most of my childhood."

I lift my head and rest my cheek on my knee, my head turned to Matt.

His expression softens and he looks at the ground, listening carefully.

“Was it… hard? Being alone like that?”

His eyes move up to meet mine. The eye contact being genuine and not as snarky as usual.

"Sometimes. My older sister, Izzy, was the only person who ever paid attention to me and made sure I had everything I needed for like school and stuff." I straighten my legs out and lean my head on his shoulder.

He looks at you for a moment, but when he sees where you put your head, his entire expression softens. His eyes glance at you before he looks down at his own lap.

“I don’t like you being alone on your birthday… you deserve to be celebrated.”

"Well, I'm not alone. I mean, you're here, aren't you?" My voice calm and filled with an emotion not even I can identify.

“I mean… yes. I am here. But I… I don’t feel like that’s enough.”

His voice is soft and gentle. Whatever emotion is filling the air right now, he must feel it too.

"To me, one person is better than nobody. So, to me, as a person who has spent quite a few birthdays alone, that is more than enough." I slightly nuzzle my head onto his shoulder more comfortably.

His eyes stay focused on your face. He hesitates for a moment, then shifts a little closer to you.

I feel his arm wrap around my shoulders, and smiles when I nuzzle into his shoulder.

After a few moments of silence, I speak up.

"This is comfortable." I mumble as I shift around to drape my legs over his and rest my head on his shoulder, closer to his chest.

"This is comfortable…." He mumbles.

He hums quietly, the action vibrating his chest and calming me down even more. I feel him rub his hand up and down my arm, and his other one draped across my waist, holding my body close to his.

I slowly let my eyes drift shut. I bring my hand to rest on his chest next to my head. I bend my knees a little and move closer to him, if possible. Suddenly feeling even more exhausted than before.

He smiles when he feels one of your hands on his chest, and he holds you even closer to him. He lets a few seconds pass, but his brain is moving a mile a minute.

"Can I… do something?" he whispers, his voice a little strained.

I nod once against his chest, the movement slowed from my fatigue.

A beat later I feel the hand that's wrapped around my shoulders lightly carding through my hair, gently massaging my scalp.

I hum in content and snuggle closer to his body, yearning for his warmth.

After a while of just lying there, I feel myself lulling into a very inviting rest. The motion of his hands in my hair, and his warmth and the way his arms are wrapped around me are enough to make me drift off into a restful sleep, my breathing evening out.

-Matt's POV-

I lay there holding her in my arms, listening to her breathing. Feeling her chest rise and fall.

"You fell asleep on me..." I mumble and run my fingers through her hair one last time before pressing a kiss to her forehead.

I keep glancing down to see if she's woken up yet, but she looks s peaceful... I hope she's comfortable.

I lay there for a few more minutes doing nothing in particular, just looking at her in this peaceful state. I can't believe I could hate her. I think I only didn't like her because I've never seen this side of her before.

After a few more minutes, I shift around so I'm holding her bridal style, her head not moving from where it's rested on my collarbone.

Slowly I make it to my room and set her down on my bed, putting the comforter over her body and then sliding in behind her, slinging my arm around her waist and holding her to me.

I breathe in her scent and feel myself lulling off.

--MORNING-- -Y/N's POV-

I wake up, instantly feeling arms around me, holding me tightly, and breathing on the back of my neck.

At first, I'm alarmed but then I open my eyes and see I'm in Matt's bed.

'How did I end up in his bed??'

"Mm..." I hear from behind me.

I look around the bed for one of our phones, but neither are in sight.

"What time is it...??" I mumble to myself before giving up my search, concluding I had left mine on the couch last night.

"Shh... It's still early.." Wow tired sounds good on him.

He doesn't sound that awake yet, his voice a bit strained. I feel him nuzzle farther into the back of my neck, gently pressing a small kiss to the base of it.

I feel my cheeks heat up from the feeling of his lips on the back of my neck. I shift around to where I'm facing him. I brush a few strands of his hair from his eyes. 

"Sleepy looks good on you..." I mumble to no one in particular. Just stating a fact.

He slowly begins to open his eyes, his expression still sleepy and calm. He looks into my eyes, the little bit of sun peeking from the cracks in his blinds shining on his eyes in just the right way. His eyebrows raise a little bit, and I can see a small blush make its way across his cheeks.

"Morning..." His voice sounding softer than I've ever heard from him. Is he... smiling? It's hard to tell.

I allow myself to gaze at his entire face, inspecting every little thing. My gaze lingers on his lips for a moment before I meet his eyes again. 

"Morning." I smile softly, not minding this kind of contact or interaction.

He just stares at me for a second, his eyes still looking tired and a smile finding its way to his face.

After a minute or two of us looking at each other, I feel the warmth of his hands leaving my sides, making me frown lightly. He sits up, leaning against the headboard, and rubs his eyes.

"D'You sleep well? You probably weren't comfortable using me as a pillow." He chuckles quietly. His voice still quiet and laced with sleepiness still, the blush not as visible, but still there.

"I was, very comfortable. But may I ask how I ended up in the bed? I fell asleep on the couch... I think." I roll onto my back and sit up a little bit, laying my upper back on the pillows, putting a bit of distance in between us.

"Yeah, I um... I carried you to my bed..." His smile disappears and his cheeks flush, changing color from the blush. He looks at his hands in his lap, seemingly avoiding my eyes.

"I thought you'd be more comfortable? I don't know..." His voice trailing off, shaking his head softly.

I clear my throat and move to a sitting position, like him, leaning against the headboard also.

"Well, uh... either way thanks for... y'know, being there last night. I kind of liked the side of Matt I saw last night." I send him a small grin, despite him not looking at me for a few more moments.

He seems to perk up at my words, once finally registering what I had said.

"You.... liked seeing me last night...?" His face flushes again and he turns his head to me, a smile on his face.

I don't think I've ever seen his smile directed towards me. Always to his brothers, family, and friends. But having him smile at me feels... special. Like it's all for me.

"Well, for one, it was the one time where you didn't call me annoying or a bitch in the same sentence. So, yeah, I like the nice Matt. And I am sorry for being a pain in the ass. I can be kind of... persistent at times and nagging."

"Yeah." I smile softly, looking down at my lap where my hands are folded together.

"That was probably one of the only times you didn't call my annoying or a bitch." I look back at him.

"So, yeah. I liked seeing the nice Matt." My smile drops a little.

"And I am sorry for being such a pain in the ass. I guess I can be kind of... persistent at times. And nagging." I slightly shrug one shoulder and pick at some of the fuzzies on my sweatpants.

His eyebrows raise again, and he looks straight at me.

"You really are something else... I didn't think you knew how to apologize!" He smiles playfully at me, but his comment hurts.

I swear I feel my heart break a little. I feel the tips of my ears warm up, and my face gets warm from the overcoming feeling of wanting to cry.

I clench my jaw and ball my left fist up, my nails digging into my palms. I move to sit on the edge of his bed and stare down at the hardwood floor.

"I think I'm going to head back to my place."

I can feel the smile drop from his face when he speaks, sounding shocked.

"Wait, what? It's still kind of early, why would you want to go already?"

I clear my throat and stand up.

"I've been over here for a week already; I should go back so I could clean up anything my roommates might've messed up." I zip my hoodie up all the way and walk to his door, not sparing him a glance, his comment hurting more than it should. I open the door and step out into the kitchen.

I hear him slide off of his bed and follow me out to the kitchen.

"Wait, don't leave. We have to talk about...." He trails of lightly. I can feel his gaze on me as I shuffle around looking for my wallet, keys and shoes.

"You and I.... We have to talk. About us..."

That makes me stop in my tracks, in the middle of the living room. I turn around to ace him.

"What is there to talk about?!" My voice strained and high pitched. Almost whiny in a 'I'm about to cry' way.

"So what? I had a moment of weakness, and you were there! Why does that have to change anything?" I throw my arms up and feel my throat starting to tighten.

"And- And just because I 'know how to apologize', doesn't mean shit! So, please tell me. I'm all ears. What is there to talk about?" I put the words in air quotes, because the way he said it, hurt my feelings. And especially after I tried to be the better person and own up to what I do and apologize for it.

His eyes narrow a little, and his voice sounds annoyed.

"Just because you had a moment of weakness doesn't mean you can just suddenly leave! There is more for us to talk about! Especially after last night."

It's obvious he's trying to keep his cool. Like he doesn't want to snap. But honestly, if he did snap, I wouldn't care. His eyes are sharp and focused as usual, but a hint of that softness from when we woke up is still faintly there.

"Nothing happened Matt! I was alone, so I went to your room, then you kicked me out of your room, and I got sad and started crying and you were the only one around! Plus, if you really fucking wanted to, which I wouldn't put it past you, you could've left me to cry alone! Laughed in my face! Called me another insult! You could've done anything! But you didn't. You stayed. And you comforted me until I fell asleep! That's all the fucking happened!" I moved closer to him. Every word I speak is accentuated by a jab of my finger to his chest.

My voice has raised a little and I'm getting angry now. My breathing has started to get a little bit faster because of the immense amount of frustration and anger I feel.

He lets out small grunts at every jab of my finger.

"Stop it! Just... stop it. You are so impossible to work with." He takes a few deep breaths, trying to calm down, but it's clear I've plucked a nerve. And good, not what I was going for, but a win is a win.

"You don't want to talk about last night because deep down, you know that you liked what you saw, but you don't want to admit it." He goes quiet and steps back, putting distance between us.

"Maybe I do like it! Maybe that's why I'm choosing to ignore it! Because I liked it! And I hate that I liked it. I hate that I let it happen. I hate that I allowed myself to cry in front of you. I hate how perfect you look, even when you're yelling at me. I hate how blue your eyes are and how much they remind me of the ocean. I hate how you can do what you want in my life, and I allow it! Because I like it!" I can feel tears of frustration spilling down my face. My eyes are wide and firm with anger and frustration. My lips twisted in a flat line, nostrils flared, and face flushed from anger and crying.

He seems to be caught off guard. His mouth slightly agape, watching my emotions switch back and forth all at the same time, looking speechless.

"O-oh..." I faintly hear him mumble. He looks...confused?

He takes a few small steps towards me, his voice so inviting.

"But... why do you hate that you like it?" His words come out in a whisper, his tone gentle, his eyes soft and calm, his face kind and inviting. He looks slightly nervous.

"Because I'm supposed to hate you! And I can't do that when I'm in love with you!" I accidently shout the words, and then immediately regret that. My eyes get impossibly wider, and my hands fly over my mouth.

He takes another step back, his jaw dropping lower. He stares at me for a few seconds, not saying anything, which makes worry churn in my stomach.

He blinks a couple times before he clears his throat and closes his mouth.

"Did- Did I hear you correctly...?"

"Fuck!" I ball my hands into fists and press the heels of my hands against my forehead and push my back against the closest wall, sliding down it to where I'm sitting on the floor with my knees to my chest.

I let out a few choked sobs and mumbles of curses before nodding.

"Yeah." My voice quiet and hoarse. I sniffle and squeeze my eyes shut for a second and open them again, dropping my hands to my sides.

I watch as he walks over to me, dropping to his knees next to me and pushes my knees away from my chest. He pulls me into his chest, wrapping his arms around my shoulders gently.

"Hey, hey... shh. Slow down. I'm not... I'm not going to judge. Just slow down. I'm right here." I hear him whisper. And feel him press a kiss to the top of my head.

"Don't panic. Just take a deep breath, let it all out. I'm right here."

That's all it takes for me to completely break down. Sobbing, and mumbling in between with hiccupped breaths. All the while he's stroking my hair and occasionally running his fingers through it.

"I'm so sorry." I manage to choke out between short breaths and sobs.

He presses another kiss to the top of my head and grabs one of my hands, his other hand rubbing my back in comforting patterns.

"You have no reason to be sorry... You're allowed to... to feel this way, okay? I'm not mad at you, and you shouldn't be mad at yourself either. Just... breathe with me, okay?" I feel his hold tighten, reminding me he's there.

I attempt to match his deep, calm breaths, but I can't. No matter how hard I try, I always end up hyperventilating after I cry.

My breathing starts to come out uneven, raggedly, too fast and choppy, making me lightheaded.

"Hey. Hey, look at me." He puts two fingers under my chin turning my head to face his.

"Breathe. Just breathe. Slowly in through the nose." He inhales slowly through his nose.

"Then slowly out through your mouth." He exhales slowly through his mouth.

"Do it with me. In."

Inhale slowly.

"Out."

Exhale slowly.

It's too difficult to match. But after many attempts, my breathing has slowed down and my head is no longer dizzy.

He watches as I control my breathing and return it to normal. Once it has returned to a normal pace, he lets go of my chin, leaving the area cold from where his fingers were.

"Good.... Deep breaths, that's right."

He lets out a small sigh and presses a kiss to my forehead before wiping my cheeks free of tears and tear stains.

"Can you tell me why you feel so bad about this?" He asks quietly.

"I don't even know. It just feels wrong, feeling this way. It feels like I'm supposed to see you as an annoying older brother but instead I developed feelings for you."

He hums gently, seeming to wrap his head around my words. He closes his eyes for a moment, taking one deep breath then opening them and looking into my eyes.

"Look, just because you're supposed to see me as a brother doesn't mean you can't have feelings for me. It just changes the dynamic. And you can't blame yourself either." He shakes his head once.

"Because it's not your fault. Not one bit." He cups my cheek and wipes away a few stray tears with his thumb.

"How did you... How did you know you were in love with me...? I mean, how- what made you realize it?"

I sniffle and clear my throat, not wanting my voice to give out. I take another deep breath before speaking.

"Last night. When you stayed and comforted me in my so called 'moment of weakness'. When you didn't push my head of your shoulder. Or even just the fact that you listened to me last night. And the way you held me was..." I trail off, not knowing how to describe it. It was so comforting and calm the way he held me, it put me to sleep. Literally.

He beams that sweet smile out, lifting my spirits a little.

"Did- did you like being comforted last night?" His voice becoming soft, and delicate.

I nod and lick my suddenly dry lips.

"Yeah. Hearing you talk that softly was really nice. And I liked being in your arms." My voice a little nervous from having to admit this out loud.

He looks as though he's processing my words, like I can see the little loading circle above his head, and then when it clicks, his entire face lights up.

He stands up, holding his arms out.

"Come here." His voice a little firm and commanding, but still soft and sweet.

I slowly climb to my feet and just about throw myself into Matt's arms, wrapping my arms around his torso and his arms wrap around my neck and shoulders.

"About fucking time you two stopped denying shit."

We break away from the hug quickly and turn to the kitchen where Chris is standing rubbing his eyes.

"What?"

"God, are you two blind? You guys have been ogling each other when the other wasn't looking. It's been driving me insane. And now Nick owes me 400 bucks."

Matt groans and I roll my eyes and plop down on the couch with a small smile on my face as I feel the cushion next to me sink and then an arm is being draped across my shoulders and pulling close to him.

--

After a while, we make it back into his room.

We're laying on his bed, both of us on our phones, not really talking.

Out of nowhere, he drops his phone and turns to me.

"You want to go to dinner sometime?"

I lay my hands in my lap, turning my head to look at him.

"Are you asking me on a date?"

"Are you going to say no?"

"No."

"Then yeah, I'm asking you on a date."

I smile at the dorky tactics and roll my eyes playfully.

I grab the part where the strings of a hoodie are on his hoodie and pull him to me, our lips colliding in the milddle.

"I'd love to go on a date with you."

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I love all of you guys !

And I hope you all have a wonderful day and / or night ♡

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31 days till october 🤭

Holy guacamole

Summary: You and Matt are best friends, maybe more.

//

Matt sat beside you tracing gentle spirals on your back as you phoned back home to your mom. She always missed you when you were away but, knew you were safe when you were with Matt. 

She was catching you up on your brother’s soccer tournament and your Grandparent's trip to Vermont. They had gone with some friends on their annual weekend away and you knew your Mom missed them a lot.

Before you hung up, she said to Matt, “take care of our girl.” Matt laughed, digging his chin into your shoulder. “Always,” he promised.

You and Matt had been best friends since elementary school. He was the first person you called in the morning and the last text you sent at night. He was the reason that your world kept spinning after your dad died.

When you were too scared to skate on the ice on your 8th birthday, he took your hand and made sure that you didn’t fall. When you broke up with your first boyfriend who you thought that you’d marry someday, Matt was there to pick up the pieces. Whenever you called, he came.

As you drove to McDonalds to grab something to eat, he laced his fingers through yours. It was this kind of simple shit that none of your boyfriends could ever seem to do for you. He opened the door, he paid for your meal and when you decided you didn’t want the Dr Pepper you ordered, he swapped his drink just to make you happy.

Matt was always a ‘let’s fix this’ type of person. Even when you disagreed or argued about the stupid things, he never left until you sorted things out. He would always be down for uncomfortable conversations if it meant you were still friends in the end. There was nothing more comforting that knowing you could be yourself around him.

As you sat on the couch, you laid your head on his chest. He was comfort in human form, he was was the only person who could make your heart still when your anxiety was out of control. He played with your hair mindlessly as you watched Spongebob together. It was moments like this that you had missed since he moved to LA.

In the morning, he woke you up with a coffee from Starbucks. He had let you stay in his bed and he was bunking with Chris. Chris didn’t mind, he liked the company. You sometimes felt like he missed Matt when you were around, but he never said that.

As you walked down the esplanade with your ice creams in hand something about it seemed different. Something about the space between you felt more fragile but, you couldn’t put your finger on it. He caught your gaze and just smiled; he held your gaze a little too long to be just friends.

Everyone could see how much the two of you loved each other. It was hard for you to put into words. You loved him in ways that you had never loved anyone else. He was your person. Something about him made you feel a little more alive and a little less lost.

As you sat on the bench looking out at the water, he tucked your hair behind your hear and ran his hand down your back. It was in those moments of intimate understanding that you felt the most seen. The little things that he did let you know that he loved you too.

He wrapped an arm around you and pulled you into his side to block you from the wind. His lips pressed against your temple; your fingers tracing circles on his thigh. This was love, wasn’t it? Didn’t the Buddhists say 'If you meet somebody and your heart pounds, your hands shake, your knees go weak, that's not the one. When you meet your 'soul mate' you'll feel calm.' This was love, wasn’t it?

You turned to face him, your legs draped over his as you looked up into his eyes, “Do you believe the universe fights for two souls to be together?”

A smile spread across his face as he replied, “I don't know about the universe but, I know that I’ve loved you for my whole life.”

Did you got the same ask about Nate but you just didn’t answer it?

yes😞 I'll answer it soon tho

aurgh this is so scrumptious to read

𝐛𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐚𝐝𝐬

nathan doe x reader (fluff)

summary: in an attempt to bake at a sleepover, you and nate forget to check your baked goods in your sleep-deprived state

warnings/notes: none! lmk if i missed anything

requested?: yes! number 18 “failed cooking/baking attempt” from my actions prompt list

> > >

You and Nate always found a way to make your casual dates more interesting. Whether it be making up random games to play, or watching shitty movies to make fun of them, you guys always ended up having fun.

Today, it was baking. At 1 AM.

You should’ve been sleeping, but upon rolling around and thrashing in the covers uncomfortably, you decided sleep wouldn’t come easy tonight.

Nate knew that too. Which is why he suggested baking in the first place.

Flour covered the entire countertop as you and Nate desperately rolled balls of cookie dough onto a baking tray. The mess in the kitchen was too much to bear, but you tried to ignore it.

“I really hope these turn out good,” he said excitedly, jumping on the balls of his feet.

You had never really baked from scratch before, but you didn’t want to rain on his parade.

“Of course they will. Trust the process, Nathaniel,” you said mockingly.

You grabbed the tray and placed it into the preheated oven, turning the timer on for 10 minutes. You didn’t have high hopes but seeing how eager Nate was, you couldn’t help but hold out for his sake. Maybe they’d turn out alright.

Nate crouched down as he stared through the glass of the oven. You giggled at the sight. His eyes were wide and glossy as he stared into the warm light, watching the cookies rise slowly.

“They won’t bake any faster if you watch them, babe,” you said, ruffling his hair from where you stood above him.

He caught your hand in his as he held onto it, using it as leverage to help him stand up. He swayed your arms side to side as he smiled giddily at you. The white light of the kitchen illuminated his features beautifully. His insane bone structure looked sharper than usual.

“Thanks for this,” you said, your head leaning on his shoulder.

His arm came to wrap around you as he leaned his head on top of yours.

“Any time. Plus it was an excuse to get free cookies.”

You both chuckled as you leaned against the island, letting the seconds tick by in silence. In all honesty making the batter had tired you out, and your eyelids seemed to be drooping already.

“Hey sleepy-head,” said Nate, shaking you gently. His hand caressed your hair out of the way as he watched you groggily open your eyes.

“Hm?” you said.

“Do you smell that?”

Your eyes widened as you realized you had left them in too long. 10 minutes was set as a precaution, but you had meant to take them out earlier to check on them.

Of course you never ended up doing that because your boyfriend’s shoulder was just so comfortable. You could fall asleep on him every single time without fail. He always said he enjoyed the fact that you felt safe enough to fall asleep so easily around him.

“Shit!” you exclaimed as you grabbed some oven mitts and dragged the tray out of the oven.

The smoke billowed out as you dropped it onto the hob. They weren’t burnt, but they were as hard as rocks.

Nate knocked on them with his knuckles, wincing at the sharpness and heat of them.

“Wow those are bad,” he said. His shoulders slumped slightly as he rubbed your back.

“I really wanted cookies,” he mumbled.

You wrapped an arm around his waist as you rested your head on him once again.

“How about for now we go cuddle and sleep - we can try again tomorrow?”

Nate hummed in agreement, his head nodding quickly.

You had started to walk towards his bedroom, holding his hand as you pulled him along. Nate, however, picked you up bridal style as he made his way to the bed.

“Could hardly call those baked goods - they were more like baked bads,” he said as he grimaced at the image of them.

You giggled as you rested your head on his shoulder as he carried you down the hallway.

“Nate, what the fuck does that even mean.”

- - -

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