My Hero Academia, Chapter 370 Thoughts.

My Hero Academia, Chapter 370 Thoughts. 

 Admittedly, I was very confused by Shoji’s response to the PLF members legitimate complaints about the discriminations that heteromorphs have suffered with a question that is off topic and tone deaf at the best, and deliberately undermining the legitimate suffering that heteromorphs have endured at the worst. 

But let’s give Shoji the benefit of the doubt as we discuss his argument and point of view underneath the cut. 

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this clip has me in hysterics. Tupp going “YOYOYOYOYOYO WAITWAITWAIT I CANT CLIMB THAT FAST” and Rapp just GLIDING effortlessly up the cliff is SENDING ME

Blooming from the flesh, Himiko and Ochako, and the bisexual monster

We have seen the comments about her as this predator, perverted being, disgusting, and just straight up the worse villain of them all. A cannibalistic being who can’t and doesn’t want to stop. Himiko has struggled her whole life with those comments too.

This representation of Himiko's self perception is really telling even if we dont have words exploring it, adding a new layer from what looked like another hyper sexual yandere character in a manga meant for cishet boys: she doesn't count as a real girl nor woman for society.

That open and broken womb its a representation of Himiko's inability of being a "proper young woman", and not fulfilling the ultime purpose: giving birth. Creating life, something good. Being something who isn't Death itself - interesting how this "character", Death, is represented with a genderless skeleton while Life is seen as mother, as a beautiful woman, at least right now in the collective memory (if we talk about actual deities and beings in cultures those two concepts are way more complex than this). Death can't be a woman nor a man, it's something that, even tho doesn't cause the harm, people deeply fear, and Himiko also parallels that.

Her favorite fruit tells the same story: pomegranates in Japan in particular are related to fertility and motherhood, and in fact related to the goddess Koshimojin who is worshipped by infertile women to bring them fertility, and the guardian of children. Himiko's innocence never existed for others, her actions equating to violence and sex and, therefore, making her the taboos rather than a person. This deity we are talking about also was originally according to some sources selfish and heartless, who would feed her own numerous children the flesh of other children whom she had abducted and slaughtered (SHE also lived on human flesh).

Fun fact that could just be random and unrelated BUT: Ochako being a witch, with the typical hat even, in the fantasy AU follows this idea too; the most common accusations against witches are about infertility too, or the things that represent the destruction of innocence (natural abortions, death and sickness of children, not being enough food for everyone, changes of weather which destroyed crops, making someone not being able of getting pregnant, etc). Ochako being a witch and Himiko being a monster... I just love that, the monstrous queerness.

She's the monster that can't just be loved by a boy like she's supposed to, she's the monster that can't just be normal; she's the monster meant to attack the innocence of others, Ochako's normality.

(can we talk about Toga being “like a doll” and Deku also being translated as a wooden doll? Mmm I wonder if her conflict with selfishness, wishes, goals and the expectations of others are similar somehow to Izuku’s!) Himiko was adultified the moment her quirk manifested, instead of it being a blessing like for many others, it took her childhood and ability to be loved back, but she doesn't express hate towards it at all; her quirk hasn’t being the sources of her pain. She hates herself, views this abnormality as a deep part of her core existence.

One of the interesting aspects of her character is how, besides being so open about it, loving loudly, and attacking with smiles, her actions and feelings are tied to the very root of her insecurities and self hatred; idk about others, but as a queer person I also feel this way and didnt realize it until very recently. I still appeal to cishet, allosexual, monogamous, and basically anti-queer standards, and the more I try to accept myself as queer without addressing these things, the more I end up feeling conflicted, following the scrips in private, ignoring what I actually want to do or my own interests and standards in order to be in something familiar, something that remembers some sort of innocence I also had took from me. I have criticized before people hating on characters and twisting storylines because of their own experiences, but I can't help but think we are pretty similar in that way, or at least my case can serve to express her own struggles: she wants to be free from society, she wants to run away from home, but she never left in the first place, and just like she has said herself before, the more you try to hide it, the more it consumes you.

It's not that she suddenly becomes more violent after Jin's death and Ochako's rejection, is that she is more and more conflicted with what she feels, what she is seeing, and what others have asked from her since she was a child: her parents called her a monster, and AFO and the heroes are expecting just that. Her ideal life includes her living, her being happy, loving, smiling, being with friends... her ideal life is not about making others’ lives harder, to make the world harder for everyone, just easier. She wants to make a positive change in the world to be happy.

That's the thing, she knows deep inside from the start love is what drives her, but the environment she has been growing in her whole life claims she is hate, claims she needs to become hate for better (with the villains) or for worse (her parents). She expresses still her need for love, but it's not the same; the familiarity of hate, or her being unwanted, and violence as a key... Of course she would end up acting this way, of course she would go against her actual desires.

What we forget about death and life is they are one and the same, and blood is the epitome of it: bleeding represent something negative typically, a danger.

And you can only bleed if you are living.

Just like that, Himiko is also Life itself just as much as she is Death, but not because of her own monstrous quirk or angelic side, it's because she is alive. Getting hurt and feeling happy can become reminders of one being alive -of course keeping in mind we dont want to romanticize anything harmful-, and I believe Himiko is also Ochako's reminder of this: she is her own person, full of complicated feelings, who can choose her own destiny and how to control it and let it flow freely.

Her character has never been about her own hate, but the hate she has received; the natural conclusion people have seeing this kind of storylines is "they became a villain as a response to it", and for Himiko that isnt right. Even tho it hurts, her main goal is living her own life

Ochako has tha opportunity as a normal girl, as a passing girl, but she didnt realize two things before meeting Toga: one, she can choose, and two, she is weird. And that's okay.

Have you ever met someone who was openly queer as a closeted and oblivious child, teen or adult? I mean for the first time ever, the concept being shown with an actual, real person in front of you. They were so strange, you don't understand them. You might even push them away, while at the same time fixate on their existence... That's what togachako feels to me, but with a reciprocated love.

Besides being, from my perspective, the introduction to queer identities, her bisexuality also serves as a link to the whole plot line of heroes and villains being humans after all; let's think a little bit about how bisexual and other identities in that spectrum are considered, seen and treated by the mainstream -and the gaystream.

Pick a side.

I think many people are expecting her to just be one thing and choose between two exclusive options, or the villains, dying for her cause while killing and causing the most destruction, or the heroes, betraying the league and helping the Ochako going against villains, but we all show she chose... both. Himiko helped Ochako, chose her, while keeping her friends in her heart; she does't need to reject neither, and that's part of her internal conflict. She tried to kill Ochako because she represented this binary, but also because she needs to fulfill her given role and she is stopping her from doing so.

I love the head canon of Uraraka being a lesbian, but her as a bisexual gives this dimension to their arc and the general story I think is special: just like Toga she also has felt this conflict between choosing a side between those groups, one being the "correct one" for a girl like her, an option her family and friends expect her to do, and another one she should get away from unless she wants to end up being disgusting. And she... chose both.

But she didn't really. And Toga neither.

Let's see.

Villains and heroes are these two big categories our main characters are labeled into, as a starting point; Himiko never considered those two in her life when considering others, but felt the pain of being labeled as a weirdo and creepy monster thru her whole life. She found a community of villains who supported her, but she saw them as her friends, not the villains, and her own perception was still highly tied into what normality is.

With this I mean society still influenced her, obviously, as it was said before she never left that house of horror completely in her mind and heart. She’s not free, rather she hates herself so much she would much rather be the normality Ochako represents from her perspective —but this vision is fake, an accidentally curated version Uraraka projected of herself in order to also not challenge hero society, as she saw as ideal.

After the war and losing her best friend her perspective shifts, she sees heroes and villains because that's what she is supposed to do... but she doesn't really. She is Himiko Toga, not a villain name but her human one. Still, Ochako's rejection also furthered her conflict as it meant "for me, you are just a monster, love isn't for your kind". Her feelings are not worthy enough in the hero society.

(for context this is after Deku also rejects her). In this scene we can see Himiko recalls the people pointing out her weirdness because she thinks they both reject her for the same reason, because they are normal and she isn’t, when it’s not the case; using her experiences as guidelines for the rest of her life, her trust in “people”, even if it’s honest, can’t compete in this fight for survival as much as her trust in “villains” over “heroes”.

In another hand Ochako clearly is from the hero side, she sees the differences and accepts them with her whole heart believing its the right way of helping people -her understanding of the world is narrow at this point, mainly just wanting to support her parents and, a little later, follow what the good hero should be like, Deku being this example as he would put everyone before him and fight with just the goal of saving in his mind. Meeting Himiko makes her feel strange about this view, because of the huge contradiction of a beautiful smile on a person who is trying to attack you! How can a villain be so cute? Her world breaks more and more, but also her self perception as a girl who needs to change in order to satisfy others' expectations on her role -she tries to be like Deku because she hates her selfishness and he looks so selfless, she tries to do the best for her parents because she feels guilty over their efforts for her and wants to see them happy.

Have you noticed Ochako hasn't expressed special interest in Izuku's happiness, but for Himiko's she tries just to at least see that smile again?

After all of that their perspectives transform into opposites -Himiko sees the differences not out of her heart, but because of the circumstances (ignoring her heart leads to nothing, she still loves people who are heroes, she feels the hurting and desire for revenge but can't let go), Ochako stops seeing the two sides and starts noticing people and acting on it. here Himiko shows how after all the core’s the same: living. Her attacks aren’t even out of wanting to just destroy for the shake of it, it’s about destroying so she can live and, maybe, live the life she’s supposed to have.

I argue they don't choose both sides because they directly refuse to do so —they embrace their selfishness, that concept so many characters have problems with, and create a whole new way. Himiko still hates, Himiko is still ready to go the League's way, but Ochako for her is more important than this division of the world, even if it means she has to be gone.

Ochako puts everyone in danger including herself in order to just get a little close to another girl, but she won't forget the harm caused -the polarization just causes this to get bigger and bigger. What looked like Uraraka’s act of selflessness, a second part of Izuku’s, turns out to be pure selfishness, and Toga’s selfishness translated into an act of selflessness. Not for big causes or anything like that, they don’t have an agenda of their own, they just do it because they care for each other.

They are not a binary you can classify into boxes and put into conflict so they kill each other, no matter how much you try. It's not that they are monsters villains and heroes all at once, they are humans who want to live their lives how they want with the people who make them happy and admire by their side. They are selfish and selfless at the same time, but thats not the point because after all, they are still people, two girls who can find each other in the middle of a whole war and still, filled with hatred and pain and not understanding fully the other's perspective, deciding this person is worthy of their love.

Who is Himiko Toga? Who is this person? A normal girl, with problems understanding and dealing with her desires in relation to others and her own self. And Ochako Uraraka? Have you thought who she is? I think she knows she is just like that, and that Izuku too struggles with the same concepts.

In another meta we will discuss smiles, weirdness and feelings too! See you!

The Villains (specifically the Lov) Are Right

Especially about the civilians in Bnha

(2 Part Meta Civilians and Lov) (Warning spoilers and long Meta Post) (Permission given to re-blog)

The Lov, specifically the core League of Villains, don’t owe any consideration, atonement or apologies to the civilians in Bnha. Because since long before the Lov had even become villains, even when they were still children, the civilians decided that they don’t owe them anything at all.

Most people I’ve seen in the fandom say something like “I don’t justify or excuse the villain’s actions.”, when it comes to the destructive/murderous parts of the villain’s deeds, which is very nice and moral of them to say.

But as long as we’re talking about the average Bnha civilian, I definitely justify/excuse the Lov’s actions.

Because the “innocent” people in Bnha are awful.

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an analysis of Spinner

Chapter 341 of BNHA shows Spinner accepting a role that he doesn’t want, all for the sake of Shigaraki. However, is it really about Shigaraki? No. The problem is that Spinner has identity issues and needs to 'borrow' someone else's purpose. BNHA places a lot of emphasis on finding out who you are, and Spinner is arguably one of the most lost characters in the series. His arc isn't about being a follower, but about finding himself. He's been searching for something worthwhile this whole time, and ironically, being forced to be a "messiah" for heteromorphs could help him find a meaning that's his very own.

Let’s go back to one of his first appearances during the summer camp arc. Spinner introduces himself and says he's here to make his dreams come true - as in, not his own, but Stain's. Spinner is loud and tries to look tough and villainous, but the Pussycat Doll Mandalay sees right through his act. He is easily flustered. It’s obvious he’s putting on a facade to hide the fact that he’s not only inexperienced fighting but that he's also not a seasoned villain. He's acting how he thinks a villain should act. After this incident he's not as showy - that is to say, he's acting like his natural self and not putting up a front anymore.

Later we learn that Stain inspired him to join the cause because he felt empty. Dabi wasn’t entirely wrong to have called Spinner a hollow Stain cosplayer because Spinner did set out to emulate Stain as a way of finding fulfillment in life. He has low self-esteem from years of feeling powerless and being discriminated against. As a result of this, he doesn’t have an understanding of who he is and finds inspiration in others. He adopts their ambitions because it gives him something to live for. He doesn’t see himself as a leader but as a supporter of those who have the power and influence to facilitate change. Stain’s capture is what inspires Spinner to take action, vowing to carry his legacy because Spinner doesn’t have his own ideology - he’s a follower who needs to follow someone else's philosophy of life. Without a leader, without that leader's vision specifically, he feels lost and unsatisfied.

So, Spinner lives his life and makes his decisions based on Stain’s values. In fact, he also does this with Shigaraki later on after MVA, which will be discussed in this meta. Before that switch in idols though, he questions Shigaraki’s choice of stealing a truck and chasing after Overhaul because those actions don’t align with Stain’s ideology of ridding society of false heroes. When the fervor Stain sparked begins to dwindle, Spinner is back to feeling empty and unsatisfied, and he can’t deal with that emptiness anymore.

This is because Spinner doesn’t have any specific wants. He doesn’t even think about what would benefit HIM. He doesn’t have his own original convictions or morals or desires like Dabi, Shigaraki, Twice, and Toga. He's empty, as he says. At the beginning of the MVA arc, Spinner is not entirely happy with where Shigaraki is leading them - they're going nowhere fast in his opinion. The LOV were all squatting in a house together, but no one except Spinner was restless or hopeless because they had their own long-term dreams and goals to push them through. But Spinner was miserable and lackluster without someone else’s vision of the future to look forward to and fight for. While he's confronting Shigaraki about the group's stagnant status, everyone else in the league looks disinterested or bored. They're NOT anticipating Shigaraki's answer because they have their own personal reasons and ambitions. Toga's even yawning.

Spinner later questioned Toga why she’s there if Stain’s influence in the LOV has all but disappeared. She joined because she too was inspired by Stain, right, so what gives? Why isn't she restless like Spinner is? Toga answers that she wants to love and be free. Stain stood up for what he believed in and that resonated with her because she wants to do things to benefit herself, too. This is represented by Toga buying herself a coat with the money she received from the doctor. Her answer doesn't help Spinner though, who just wants to feel a purpose again. Her purpose doesn't resonate with him because it's too personal and he can't relate.

So, he replies in a disgruntled manner and puts on his Stain-inspired mask over his eyes, symbolizing that he's still furthering someone else's dreams instead of making his own. Stain's influence may be gone from the LOV but it still lives on in Spinner. He even closes his eyes to other possibilities - literally, closing his eyes as he dons the mask and accepts his current situation. He does the same thing in 341 when he tells himself he's doing this all for Shigaraki's sake. As in, this is his role, this is what a follower does. A follower comes in and carries on the leader's will in their absence. And right now, Shigaraki is in no position to lead.

And speaking of Shigaraki… During MVA, Spinner realizes that he and Shigaraki are similar in that they both feel hollow and forsaken by the world. Spinner can relate to him in ways he couldn't with Toga. Unlike Spinner, however, Shigaraki has big lofty dreams of destroying everything that hurt him and building something new out of it, which inspired Spinner. As someone who's searching for a purpose, believing in Shigaraki's dream gives Spinner guidance, hope, and something to do, because he couldn't stay at home doing nothing anymore, and hiding out with the LOV was starting to feel too similar to that bleak time in his life. Seeing Shigaraki actually pull through with his promise of an empty horizon is what sealed Spinner's loyalty to Shigaraki.

Shigaraki became his new Stain. It’s not about Shigaraki as a person - yes, he cares about Shigaraki on a personal level too - but mostly he wants to see what Shigaraki can accomplish because Shigaraki is someone who DOES deliver on promises. It’s not a coincidence that Spinner challenges Shigaraki ("where are we going?!") at the same time the doctor challenges Shigaraki to prove himself. It's also not a coincidence that Horikoshi depicted both Machia and Spinner becoming enchanted by Shigaraki’s ability to show them a demolished horizon at the same time that Redestro surrendered and turned over thousands of his followers to Shigaraki. Machia is a loyal servant, almost to the point of being blind, and so are Redestro's followers. There's a reason no one else from the League is there to witness this - they already have their own personal goals, after all. They don't need to borrow a cause.

Spinner unwillingly taking the role of the face of a movement is reminiscent of his attitude about carrying Stain's legacy. He's not doing this to further his own dreams or for his own interests, no. He doesn’t really have tangible dreams or goals. Even though he was discriminated against and hated for being a heteromorph, his goal was never to further heteromorph equality. Spinner's cause was Stain's cause, and Stain's cause didn't involve heteromorphs. Spinner right now is submitting to being a "messiah" for Shigaraki because it's what would further Shigaraki's cause. Helping make someone else's dreams come true makes him feel less hollow and less like a waste of space. All he has to do is do whatever the leader wants, right?

But that's where Spinner is wrong because he doesn't know Shigaraki, not really. None of the League really know each other’s trauma - they haven't sat around and opened up and shared their pasts or their feelings. If they had, they would realize they're all self-destructing. They all have different desires and are being pulled in different directions. Because they haven't had this discussion, Spinner mistakenly believes that the hand Shigaraki carries gives him strength and doesn’t realize it actually triggers trauma and rage, which enables AFO to manipulate Shigaraki.

This is why the framing around Spinner and AFO in 341 is so ominous right now. AFO is using both Shigaraki and Spinner, and it’s easy for Spinner to fall prey to this because he doesn’t have his own convictions. This is apparent during MVA when he admits he jumped on the bandwagon. He says there’s nothing wrong with that, but we know from the citizen’s blind worship of heroes that that’s incorrect. The story has established that there IS something wrong with only being a follower and not questioning the status quo. Stain was to the Spinner what All Might was to the civilians: a symbol of hope. Similarly, Shigaraki is to Spinner what Stain once was. Spinner is being manipulated and used by AFO because he’s Shigaraki’s most loyal - aka blind - follower, like the civilians, like Redestro's followers.

Even when Spinner’s guts tell him to question what’s happening - “you’re not the guy I chose to follow” - all AFO has to do is reassure him that this is what Shigaraki wants and Spinner is complacent again. It's ironic because during the war arc he told Toga to come back to the League because he assumed Shigaraki would want everyone together, but that's not happening right now either. The league is splitting apart. Dabi and Toga seem to want to carry on Twice's sad man's parade while Shigaraki loses more of his autonomy and isn’t even aware of what his comrades are doing.

Basically, Spinner admits to being a follower. He's a vessel borrowing other people's dreams, not someone with their own beliefs. He operates using a "what would Stain/Shigaraki do?" mentality instead of "what do I want?" He latched on to Stain and now he has latched on to Shigaraki, and it's not a good thing because Shigaraki is being used by AFO. This means Spinner is being used too, and he’s not even aware of it because he has no idea what’s going on in Shigaraki’s heart. Spinner is acting on the belief that this is what Shigaraki would want, but what Shigaraki wants (destruction, power) and what Shigaraki needs (a hero) are two different things. I've seen a lot of metas stating that Spinner's remaining arc is going to be focusing on his devotion to Shigaraki. My issue with that is that Spinner's arc can't end with him as a mindless follower that enables AFO to manipulate Shigaraki. Spinner's actions as of now have landed him in a spot where he is further away from being in charge of his own fate, which is exactly how and why he withdrew from the world and felt powerless in the first place.

BUT, luckily, AFO giving Spinner power to influence the protesting heteromorph people will give Spinner a purpose, even if he stopped looking for one because he was borrowing Shigaraki's. This is why, in the debate of whether or not Spinner will die doing something heroic for Shigaraki, I'm of the belief that his story won't end with him staying stagnant and remaining a hollow shell of a person. His story isn't just about being a blind follower for Shigaraki, or Stain, or whoever. There's a lot of setup throughout the story that indicates he is increasingly aware that, on some level, he has choices to make. He keeps mentioning while he narrates that this journey the LOV are on can't be stopped, and it's not framed in a positive manner. The most recent chapter points out that Spinner has been reluctant but has decided to stick with "Shigaraki's" ideals and dreams, and that's not framed positively either. Especially because 'ideals' get brought up so often in BNHA as something you need to have. Spinner needs some ideals of his own if he's going to accomplish something positive. Ideals are how Shigaraki's story got kick-started, it's how Deku's story got kick-started, and Shouto's and Dabi's and even the UA kids' got kickstarted. And it's how Spinner's will get started, too, once he realized he is unknowingly making things worse.

So, him dying does not seem like the right way to end his arc, and neither does continuing to blindly follow Shigaraki, or anyone else for that matter. Like I said before, BNHA places a lot of emphasis on finding out who you are, and Spinner is arguably one of the most lost characters in the series. I feel like Spinner, being one of the four remaining members of the LOV out on the battlefield, has to step into his own identity. Rather than spinning STAIN'S dreams or SHIGARAKI'S into a reality, he needs to spin his OWN dreams into a reality. But before he can do that, he needs to find out what his dreams are, and not latch onto someone else's. Spinner needs to realize that he DOES have the power to facilitate change, starting with using his voice to lead other lost people looking for guidance much like he has been doing.

This brings me to some speculation. I feel like Spinner, who is often paralleled to Stain, will be one of the first ones to realize it’s best to go against AFO and will reach out to the heroes for help. It’ll be a parallel to Aoyama and Stain helping the heroes. Spinner being the bridge between Deku and Shigaraki would mean Spinner finally took action based on HIS OWN ideals and not someone else’s. It would be an autonomous decision - one that ironically goes against the values of the villain leaders he idolizes but will ultimately line up with his newfound ideals and identity.