Romantic De-prioritization And Aromantic Resonances In History

Romantic De-prioritization and Aromantic Resonances in History

An Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week project

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“Representation” is a major theme in ace and aro communities, and it’s usually used to mean fictional characters. That’s all well and good, but the emphasis on the power of fictional narratives sometimes leaves me feeling a little empty. While it’s definitely refreshing and empowering to see characters going through the same things I am, sometimes I think… their happy ending isn’t real, it’s because an author decided that they should have one and then created a world in which they could.

I’ve felt most uplifted and empowered by histories of real people living the kind of life I wanted, being able to point to them and say, “See, THEY did it, THEY had the same priorities and feelings I do, and they went on to have the non-romantic life I want and they became important/respected/brilliant/supported/loved anyway.”  With a sense of both that, it was done at different times in the past when mores were different; and not only that, when in some ways it was harder. If they could do it, I can do it too. I felt represented. And I want more of that out there.

Over the course of Aro Week, I’ll be presenting mini-biographies of people who never married, never expressed romantic desire, or otherwise de-prioritized romance in their lives.  I can’t necessarily claim they were definitely aromantic; we can’t know that, and they didn’t name their identities that way.  But they made their way in the world aromantically, and were inspirational and resonant on my own aromantic journey.

Mary Anning

Nikola Tesla

Louisa May Alcott

Henry David Thoreau

Mary Moody Emerson

Mary Long and Grace Parker

Ella Cara Deloria

I have no idea but I've been staring at this for several minutes.

Ralph McQuarrie’s 1986 cover for Eric Frank Russell’s ‘Sinister Barrier’

This is about Amena applying to PUOMANT while ART becomes suspiciously (annoyingly) invested in construct education. Three gets its first solo mission. MB does *not* get to enjoy its serial in peace.

Let’s talk about the astounding similarities between cats and autistic people, and how we should make them the official autism mascot instead of that godawful puzzle piece

“Learning to be a Person”

Excellent take. There’s some crossover here with Wayfarers (Becky Chambers).

to the extent that becoming an adult is a kind of “learning to be a person” this is exactly what MB is doing in a very literal sense. As with the Aandrisk expression for coming of age, translated: “learning to be a person” MB’s task is not so much to turn into something it wasn’t before but to learn how to interact with others and itself on those unfamiliar terms, and to do so largely outside of a space that will leave room for it to do so slowly or safely.

for both MB and the Aandrisks - and in contrast to the incremental trial and error humans try to allow for adolescents - becoming its own independent person is a bit like trying to get on a merry-go-round spinning as fast as the other kids can turn it.

at least on Hashkath you’ve got a hatch family to provide a soft landing. In the CR though, MB’s facing the most gruesome of mulch-eating wipeouts if that jump misses.

Good thing it’s sturdy.

The Murderbot Diaries could be read as the coming-of-age story of a late teen/young adult.

(Spoilers for basically the entire Murderbot series)

-At the end of the first book, Murderbot strikes out on its own for the first time.

-It adapts to its new, wider world, tries out a few jobs, and learns about itself in the process.

-Eventually, it sees something that reminds it of its family and starts to miss them.

-It returns home, having learned a lot along the way.

-It experiences a family crisis that puts a new burden of responsibility on it.

-It begins its formal career, this time with help from friends and family.

-It meets someone and they decide to move in together, but Murderbot knows it can always visit its family.

A journey much like the one many of us experience in life. Maybe this is part of what makes Murderbot such a sympathetic character.

i had three fic ideas.  wrote one.  i still have three fic ideas.  this is not how math is supposed to work.