Fight Off The Light Tonight And Just Stay With Me (honey, Don't You Leave) || Ot7
fight off the light tonight and just stay with me (honey, don't you leave) || ot7
Warnings: a teeny tiny bit of blood, mentions of hospitals and surgery, heavy angst(?)
I won't control you, but MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. This is not for you, please.
Pairings: OT7/(F) Reader, Jackson Wang/(F) Reader
Plot: Will it be too late for them to try and make things right?
Genre: not really unrequited love (but they're all idiots), mutual pining, angst, denial of feelings, poly ot7
Did you ever love her? Do you know?
Or did you never want to be alone?
And she was singing "Baby, come home."
"Baby, come home."
I've got those jet pack blues
Fight off the light tonight and just stay with me;Honey, don't you leave.
mixtape: all i have left to give - part 1 - part 2
thank you so much because this fic was my first one to reach more than 10 kudos in ao3 and some peeps liked the first part enough to reblog to want to read the next part you don't know how much it means to me :o oh my fucking god how did that happen??? thank you so friggin much!!!
sorry if my summaries are all song lyrics owo i just love taking inspiration from them when i write because i can't find the old me who can write and word vomit in a drop of a hat huahuahauhauhauahuahauaau am sorry my bad
bit of warning for some teeny tiny blood and hospitals but no one will die, i promise! i mean not yet, so far i haven't thought that far yet.
also!!!! i'm not a medical expert so please let me know if there are inaccuracies because there are bound to be, no matter how much research i do or how much i ask from doctor frens hueheuheuuefhiuf
title from Jet Pack Blues by Fall Out Boy because fuck yeah i wouldn't get them as a first tattoo if i didn't love them so much
hope i don't disappoint! if i do, i'm so sorry hahahuhu my mom always told me i'm a disappointment so there's kinda nothing new
hope i can write the next parts soon T_T
❤️🩹
You can feel the string in your chest slowly fraying.
You never thought that is possible. After all, the strings are connected to the soul and can never be seen. However, when you started the therapy, you started feeling it fray. Slowly and painfully. You don't know how and why, you just do.
Your symptoms are worsening, too. Doctor Im advised you against overworking and stressing yourself but how can you not? It feels like no matter what you do or where you turn, the boys are there. Your only escape is your work and in your line of work, stress is inevitable, so you have no choice but to endure it. At least at work, you are in control. At least at work, you don't have to think about being unwanted—your clients are the ones who request your services, after all.
You don't know what to feel, really. It feels like fate is pushing you to your limits and wants to see you suffer.
Look, even you can admit to yourself that there's no need to undergo the therapy. Your soulmates can go get fucked and feel your pain through the bond.
But you can't have that, can you?
You're not one to lie to yourself, you know why you feel this way. Aside from the fact that fate (unfortunately) assigned you seven soulmates who can give less of a fuck about you, you know deep down that you want to be with them and not just because your souls were linked to each other.
You're in with love them, period.
You've seen them through their bests and their worsts, and you're still hopelessly in love with them. You've seen their sides that they never dare show you, the beauty they unfairly grant other people but not you. You've also seen their worst, the ugliness seemingly reserved for you alone, but the longing is still there.
You can't help it, and you're sadly fucked no matter how you look at it.
As you massage your perpetually aching chest, you also think how your dignity and pride are the only ones you have left. While it might be a rush of satisfaction to see them squirm, it is at the cost of your pride. You learned early on in life that you can never show your emotions—most especially your weakness—with how many times people fucked you over by using them against you.
In this case, you have to endure every pain to save face. So if it helps everyone sleep at night, then you'll give them what they want. If they don't want you, then you'll just have to remove yourself from the equation altogether. Simple math.
You snort. You're being too dramatic. You're used to this, you tell yourself. From your mother to the few lovers you had; there was always something wrong with you, something lacking. You're never needed in your whole life, so it was easy for them to leave you. It was always the easiest choice to not choose you. Why are you crying about it now?
You shake your head with a resigned sigh. There's no use regretting this. You swore to yourself you would stop regretting things you do and now is the time to stand by it. For yourself, and for the inner child in you who did nothing but run after people who turned their backs on her.
You try to stave off the pounding behind your temples by rubbing your eyes with your palms. While you are thankful that the meds seem to be working and the boys can't feel any input of emotions from you through your bond, the medicines and treatments are such pains in the ass. Fucking side effects.
Speaking of side effects, Doctor Im told you that one side effect would be them not feeling any of the emotions you feel, but you would still feel theirs, the latter possibly more potently than normal. You tried to test the emotion theory before, afraid that it will fail and the meds won't work. This is your only chance at walking away with your precious pride intact, so this should work. This has to work.
"It might take a while, but your emotions shouldn't reach through their strings anymore once you continuously undergo the whole therapy process," Doctor Im had said.
"You would still feel theirs, unfortunately." He looks at you tenderly, albeit with not an ounce of pity. That's okay, you don't want anyone's pity. "You'll be more attuned to them than a normal person is to their soulmate because your soul will be tender from all the treatments."
Doctor Im Jiho is kind, a little young for his profession if you say so yourself, but he is brilliant. It's what made you trust him. Even if the therapy is still not ratified and recognized legally, and still in its human trial stages, something about how passionately Doctor Im explained the whole therapy process and what it entails just screamed 'I know what the fuck I am doing'.
Or he should. Please let it be true, or you'll just rip your lungs out of your ribs and unalive yourself. So far though, Doctor Im and his team delivered.
Back to the emotion theory you have.
You wanted to see if the therapy works. Since soulmates can feel each others' extreme emotions, going through soul-scraping therapy shouldn't send any of yours to their end of the bond. To be sure, you waited a month into the treatments to start with the observation.
Since you've been keeping your distance and you cannot see it for yourself, you asked for help from Ae-cha and their other managers, most especially Kyunghee. They understood and agreed with no questions asked, and for that, you are eternally grateful.
You asked them for even the slightest changes in the boys' behavior during times when you know your emotions were at high. So far, there were none. It's either the meds are really working or they are just good at masking it. The second would be implausible, knowing how anything related to you would be a nuisance for them. They would make their displeasure known about it, you're sure.
Sejin, however, you're not sure you can face his pitying eyes again, so you never asked him. You don't want to hear the pitying tone in his voice one more time either. Once is more than enough to last for your lifetime.
You are just about to reach for the medicine bottle when you feel your eyeballs twitch rapidly from behind your eyelids and the pounding in your temples grow louder.
God, not now. You still have that meeting set with your lawyers. Not now.
You dial your assistant's number shakily.
"Joy, can you please phone Attorney Shin for me?" You say to the phone through your coughs, the air in your chest feels like slowly being squeezed out of you.
"Are you okay, [Name]?" Comes your assistant's concerned voice through the phone speaker. "Do you want me to call Doctor Im?"
You take the glass of water on your table with shaking hands. "I'm okay. I'm okay." You take big gulps of water, but the feeling doesn't pass. "There's no need."
Joy ignores the last part. "I'm going there, wait for me."
You go to tell her not to bother, but she hangs up before you can. A few minutes later, Joy comes through the door slightly panting.
"[Name]!" Joy takes hurried steps toward you, but you weakly wave her off. "You look like death. Jeez, I'm calling Doctor Im!"
"No, no! I'm—" You burst into another fit of whooping coughs and faintly hear Joy's worried voice.
Your hand comes away with splotches of blood, some staining the sleeve of your pullover shirt.
"Oh, shit. Shit, [Name]!" Joy screeches, now terrified. She runs to the doorway and shouts. "Jenny! Jenny! Come quick!"
Footsteps sound shortly later and you hear Jenny's panicked shrieks.
"[Name]? Are you okay?!" You feel Jenny's hand touch your shoulder. "Oh, my god. Dongwoon! Dongwoon!" More footsteps but you don't register them, black spots dancing in your vision.
So maybe you're not okay right now.
Oops, your bad.
You stand up slowly to tell them you're fine. However, before you can even open your mouth, you cough and retch.
More blood.
"[Name]!"
The last thing that registers in your brain are strong arms catching you when you black out, their panicked voices warped in your ears.
(oh, darling. what are we going to do with you?)
---
"I got it! I got it now, hyung," Taehyung says with a grin to Hoseok as Jimin comes back through the door of their practice room.
"Yeah? Let's run that through again?" Hoseok asks with a satisfied smile.
"Okay!" Taehyung nods. The boys are all feeling happy because the choreography turned out really good and is something they are proud of. The good feeling doesn't last long, however, when Jungkook bursts into the room.
"Hyung! Hyung!"
They all turn to look at him, eyebrows raised. Namjoon tsks at him.
"Kook, don't run. How many times do I—"
"[Name]-noona!"
They all freeze.
''She... she..." Jungkook then bursts into breathless tears, which propels Yoongi and Namjoon out of their seats. Jin turns off the music. When Jungkook doesn't continue, Namjoon shakes his shoulders.
"Jungkook, what is it?'" Panic rising in his voice.
"They rushed her to the hospital," Jungkook chokes through his sobs. "Y-Yonsei. They rushed her to Yonsei, hyung."
Their stomach drops at that.
Ever since they discovered by accident that you had been undergoing soul-scraping therapy, they have been keeping an eye on you. It took a while for some of them to accept or maybe even acknowledge you as their other soulmate, some longer than others, but they're getting there.
However, the pit in their stomach and the guilt in their chests never really went away, so they had to do it slowly and inconspicuously. They watched from afar and through their staff, and it pissed them off to no end that they have to do so, but they have to. They want to take it slowly and surely so as not to confuse and overwhelm you, still also confused about what they're feeling themselves.
"Yonsei? Hospital? Are you sure?" Jimin asks. "Why—"
"I don't know, hyung. I just heard Manager Sejin talking to Kyunghee-nim." Jungkook looks lost, tears flowing down his cheeks. "[Name]-noona..."
Jin doesn't even wait for their response, sprinting out of the room to find where Sejin is.
"Jin-hyung!"
He ignores them, spotting Sejin standing with his phone clutched in his hand, and talking to one of their other managers, Kyunghee. The pained expression on their faces and their hushed conversation say everything Jin needs to know.
"Sejin-nim!"
At the sound of his voice, Sejin and Kyunghee both turn to look at him.
Jin halts to a stop in front of the two. "What happened to her?"
"How did you—?"
"Please, Sejin-nim," Jin begs as the others come into view, slightly panting. "I need to know, please."
Sejin looks at Kyunghee, the latter with a grim expression on her face.
"Is it because of the therapy?" When Sejin didn't answer, Jin turns to Kyunghee. "Kyunghee-nim, please."
Kyunghee nods with a solemn expression. "Yes." The others gasp behind him but nothing registers. "Joy told me she'd been getting sicker as of late. She collapsed this morning."
Jungkook's sobs get louder, but Jin paid them all no mind. The only thing on his mind is—
"[Name]." He looks at Sejin with desperation in his eyes. "Take me to her. I want to see her."
Sejin purses his lips, sharing a look with Kyunghee. "I'm afraid I can't do that."
"Why?!" Jin's eyes are shining from unshed tears, frustration bubbling in his chest. "I want to see her. Take me to her, Sejin-nim. Please."
"We have explicit instructions not to let any of you see her," Kyunghee says steadily. "We can't take you there, Jin. I'm sorry."
"If you're not taking me to her, I'll go there by myself," Jin says stubbornly. "I don't care about whose instructions they are; she's my soulmate and I'm seeing her."
"A soulmate you all rejected!" Sejin bursts out sharply. "You all asked her to stay away from you, asked me to talk to her before. Or don't you remember?"
Jin falls silent at that. The others are no better, hanging their heads in shame.
"You didn't see her eyes that day, Jin. I was the one to look the poor girl in the eyes." Sejin's tone softens. "Don't do this to her. Do you want to see her in more pain?"
"I just want to see her," Jin says brokenly. "I won't show myself to her. I'll be gone when she wakes up." Jin pleads. "Please, Sejin-nim. It's all I ask of you, please."
"She explicitly asked me before not to let anyone of you near her, so I can't. We have to respect that."
Jin huffs angrily, turning back to Jungkook. "Yonsei, you said?" He doesn't wait for the response and stalks off, patting for his keys in his pockets.
Shit. He left them in his room.
"Seokjin!" Sejin runs after him, but he ignores him.
"Hyung!" Someone pulls his arm back, and it's Namjoon.
"No!" Jin yanks his arm back. "This stops now, Namjoon."
"Hyung."
"That's our soulmate. Our soulmate!" Jin shakes his head. "Fuck getting burned and left behind—we left her behind. All seven of us. If us getting used and left behind by people who are not our soulmates hurt, how do you think that would feel for her, rejecting and leaving her? Her own soulmates!"
"You know why we had to do it!" Namjoon bellows.
"And it's bullshit! She is our actual soulmate, you saw her marks!" Jin yells back. "You know how I felt about this. I told you all how I felt about this, but you didn't listen. Nobody listened to me."
"Hyung, that's enough!" Yoongi growls. "It's unfair for you to put this on us; you agreed to it, too."
"Because I'll lose you all if I don't! You gave me no choice!"
"We never said that!" Hoseok holds Yoongi back from stepping further toward Jin, the latter seething in anger. "We never asked you to do that."
"You get drunk and cry to me, telling me to always choose you and the others. That's not asking me?" Jin sneers. "You always saying how we should always choose each other and no one else, that's not asking me? You asked me to stay away from her even when it hurts choosing between you and her. Do you take me for a fool, Yoongi?"
Jin looks at all of them and they would shrink at the anger that is not normally present on his beautiful face, but they're all too furious to back down.
"I tried to talk to all of you, but no one listened."
He looks at Jimin and Hoseok, and they both look away in guilt. "This is not something you two should be neutral about. She had been nothing but kind to you."
Jin turns and jabs his finger toward Namjoon. "I thought you of all people can be reasoned with, but you let your pride cloud your judgment. I thought you had the brains to see through your fucking ego, but I was clearly wrong."
He then looks at Taehyung, rage marring his face. "And you. Do you think I wouldn't know how you rubbed the rejection in her face like an asshole, Taehyung? Huh? How dare you?"
Jungkook gasps and whips his head toward Taehyung with a hurt expression.
"Hyung?" Jungkook puts his hand on Taehyung's shoulder, who doesn't look back at any of them. "What is he talking about?" Jungkook turns back to Jin, confusion on his teary face. "What are you talking about, Jin-hyung?"
Jin scoffs. "He asked her how it feels to be rejected, and how it feels to run around with people who aren't her soulmates a few months ago at that bar. Didn't you, Taehyung?" The others gasp, their eyes widening as they all turn towards Taehyung, who now looks guiltily away from them.
"And I had to know from Jackson, of all people. Jackson! The asshole didn't hold back in letting me know how it's a good thing [Name] will never be ours. How do you think it feels to stand there and listen to him tell me how stupid I am for dropping my soulmate when I never wanted to in the first place, Taehyung?"
"Taehyung-ah!" Hoseok cried. "Why would you do that to her?"
Taehyung yanks his arm off Hoseok's grasp. "I don't know, okay?! I don't know!" he snarls. "She looked so happy with him and I can't think straight! I wasn't thinking straight." He chokes on his sobs.
"You shouldn't have done that, Taehyung-ah!" Hoseok admonishes. "She didn't do anything wrong to us."
"I know, okay?!" he snaps. "I know we asked her to stay away but I can't help feeling angry that she's so happy without us when all I can think is we asked for this, we wanted this."
Taehyung breaks down and weeps. Hoseok puts his arms around him in a tight hug.
"I didn't know what I was thinking," he cries repeatedly. "I didn't know what I was thinking."
There were a few heavy minutes of silence, save for Taehyung's sobs and Jungkook's sniffles.
"If anything happens to her, I'll never be able to forgive myself." Jin eventually says. "I'm no saint, but I never ever would intentionally hurt [Name] more than we are already doing.
"Even if we try to make things right, it might be too late. But, I still want to try because it's what she deserves. So, I won't let anyone stop me. No one can stop me," Jin looks at them one by one, lingering a little longer on Namjoon's and Yoongi's faces. He takes a deep steadying breath.
"Not any of you can stop me. Not even any of you." He shakes his head. "Not anymore."
He abruptly turns on his heels, and Jungkook runs after him.
Jin needs to see you, and he'll find a way to, even if has to go against anyone's wishes.
He'll find his way to get back to you.
(took him too long, darling. will he make it in time?)
---
In the end, Sejin did take him to the hospital. Jungkook, unsurprisingly, came with him. The younger clung onto him all the way to Yonsei, tears staining his dark shirt.
"I don't want to lose any of you, hyung." Jungkook cries, face buried in Jin's chest. "But I don't want to lose her, too."
"I know," Jin says, voice hoarse. "You won't lose me. I don't want to lose her, too." He buries his in Jungkook's soft locks, trying to keep the tears that had been threatening to spill since he sat in the back of the car.
"We'll make it right this time, Gguk-ah."
---
Jin doesn't know what to expect when the car stops in front of Yonsei Medical Center. He had a plan up until they stopped, the car running idly in the background. Now, he doesn't think he's ready to see you, too afraid of what he'll come across.
He knows he's getting ahead of himself, but he can't help but think that he might be too late, that he had already lost your heart.
No.
He takes a deep breath and steels himself.
He can do this. He can do this for you.
"You ready?" he asks Jungkook. Jin wipes at the stray remaining tears on Jungkook's face and runs his hands through the now-long hair just so he can keep his hands busy and stop them from shaking.
"I don't know, hyung." Jungkook's wide eyes are still glassy. "I'm scared."
Jin smiles gently. "Don't be. Hyung's here." He takes Jungkook's hand on his own. "We have to be strong for her if we want to do it right. Okay?"
"Okay, hyung." Jungkook nods with a small hopeful smile. "Okay."
For all the bravado that he conjured up while in the car, in the elevator, and in the hallways to the sterile room of the ICU, Jin still isn't prepared for what greets him when they take you inside your room.
They had to wait for you to be taken to your room from the operating room. The whole time they were waiting, Jin can't stop his leg from jiggling and Jungkook was no better, pacing around the room while lost in his thoughts.
Then the door opened.
He stands and gasps in sync with Jungkook's own, and he has to stop himself from falling to the floor.
When they said that you collapsed, he was thinking that maybe you were just overworked. That, and that the therapy's side effects just added to it. You'll be fine, you'll be okay.
This... this is far from what he expected. This is definitely not fine, and this is way worse.
You are hooked on different machines and it scares him to death. Your skin is pale and frail with bluish spots and rashes all over your face and skin, and your lips are almost blue. Your hands and fingers have spots of violet, green and grayish tints.
You look like death.
Jungkook breaks into sobs, calling your name as Jin stands there frozen. He only snaps out of it when one of the nurses stops Jungkook from running to your side and grasping your hand.
"We have specific instructions from her doctor not to allow skin contact with the patient, not until we know who her soulmate is," the nurse says as she wheels your bed to place, putting a hand to stop Jungkook from getting closer to the bed.
"That's us," Jungkook says as Jin steps behind him. "We're her soulmates."
If Jungkook thinks that this will make the nurse relent, he's sorely mistaken.
The nurse shakes her head resolutely. "All the more reason you are both not allowed to have skin-to-skin contact with the patient."
"What?" Jin blurts out.
"I'm not at liberty to discuss information about Miss [Last Name]'s condition," the nurse points out. "We advise waiting for Doctor Choi. He'll be here in a few minutes."
Jin is itching to just fuck it and take your hand, but he knows it would not be wise until they speak to the doctor.
Doctor Choi can't arrive fast enough.
Jin pulls Jungkook down to sit beside him as they see the nurses fuss over you. He has no choice but to resist the urge to touch and hover over you as his chest pulls him to do. He doesn't want to risk hurting or harming you further, so he sits on the couch and puts his hand on Jungkook's knee instead.
"What's taking them so long, hyung?" Jungkook's knee is jiggling, and Jin pats him gently. Jin looks calm outwardly, but his shaking hands betray him. "Why is her doctor not here yet?"
"I don't know, Gguk-ah, but we have to be patient."
Jungkook looks at him with furrowed brows. "How can you be so calm about this?" His eyes sparkle with unshed tears.
Jin laces his hand with Jungkook's, still shaking. It then dawns on Jungkook that Jin is anything but calm.
"I'm not." Jin takes a deep breath, otherwise, the tears he tries so hard to suppress will start pouring. "I'm not, but I have to."
He looks at where you're lying on the bed.
"We have to, Gguk. She needs us right now. We need to set things right, and we can't do that if we fall apart right now. Okay?"
It's then that the door to your suite opens. Jin and Jungkook both stand at the sound and in strides whom Jin recognizes as Doctor Im from his visits to you, and another doctor whom he presumes as Doctor Choi.
"Oh. Mr. Kim. Mr. Jeon," Jin and Jungkook bow slightly at the acknowledgment, "I didn't expect to see you two here."
That sends a pang to Jin's chest, but he ignores it. He knows they deserve the unintended jab.
"Should I expect the others to arrive soon?" the doctor asks.
Should they?
"We're honestly not sure, Doc." Manager Sejin, as usual, saves the day. "Kim Sejin." Sejin holds his hand out to shake the doctors' hands.
"Im Jiho, Animaelogy specialist." Doctor Im shakes his hand and points to the doctor beside him. "This is Doctor Choi Daeseong, head surgeon for Yonsei Medical." The other doctor shakes Sejin's hand.
"Due to the nature of Miss [Last Name]'s case, we would have to request the rest of the security detail present to leave the room for a while. You three can stay, but that's as far as we can allow for this discussion."
Sejin nods. "That will be no problem." He nods at the two men standing by the door, who immediately bow and take their leave. The nurses slowly file out of the room as well.
The two doctors walk toward your prone figure, and Jin and Jungkook follow suit. Doctor Im makes a short check of your vitals, while Doctor Choi checks you with gentle hands and looks at your charts. Once done, the two doctors turn toward the three remaining men in the room.
"Is there someone we can talk to from Miss [Name]'s team about her overall condition and routines these past few weeks or months?" Doctor Im asks.
"We can ask Joy Song from her team, as well as Jenny Ri. They're her closest assistants, so they can provide information. I last saw them trying to contact [Name]'s lawyers." Sejin supplies.
Doctor Im nods. "I see." He takes a quick look towards you before turning back to them. "I'm afraid [Name] isn't doing too good right now.
Jungkook finds Jin's still shaking hands, lower lip trapped between his bunny teeth.
"It's a good thing that her team was able to rush her in right away. If not, the situation would have been graver than it is now."
Jin's heart stops.
"G-grave?" he asks, voice trembling. "What do you mean 'grave'?"
It's Doctor Choi who speaks this time.
"When Miss [Last Name] was brought in for the emergency surgery, we had to do an emergency septal myectomy." Doctor Choi holds up a film of a scan, presumably [Name]'s.
"This is Miss [Last Name]'s echocardiogram." He points at a white portion in the middle of the scan, and Jin's head swims. "Miss [Last Name]'s septum is drastically thicker than that of a person with a healthy heart, so it prevented healthy blood flow to the chambers of her heart. Added to the treatments she was undergoing, it caused abnormal and uneven blood flow to her heart and the rest of her body, and caused complications that were...life-threatening."
Doctor Im looks at the other doctor. "It appears that [Name] has been hiding her symptoms since our last meeting, possibly way longer, so it was left untreated."
"What happened, Doc?" Sejin asks as he looks between the two doctors. "Is she going to be okay?"
The doctors share a grim look, one that Jin notices.
"What is it?" he asks, eyes darting between the two.
"Her heart nearly gave out from the heavy stress her body was in, Mr. Kim. Her blood wasn't being properly pumped and filtered, and her immune system was heavily compromised, so she suffered from bilateral pneumonia, which also affected her bloodstream.
Doctor Im takes off his glasses and sighs heavily. "She had septic shock caused by sepsis."
"She almost didn't make it." Doctor Choi says. Jin gasps in sync with Jungkook, the latter almost collapsing to the floor. "She went into cardiac arrest on the table, but we were able to bring her back."
(jin thinks his heart can't get any more bruised than it already is. your poor heart is battered literally and metaphorically. how can he possibly fix it for you?)
(he should've never listened when they asked him to stay away from you. he should've fought for you and with you, that way you're not alone.)
"But she's going to be okay, isn't she?" Sejin asks what the other two can't, what they're too afraid to ask.
Doctor Choi pauses before he shakes his head with pursed lips. "I'm afraid we can't really tell right now. We put her in an induced coma while we try to let her body recover, and we administered treatments, which will continue within the next few days. We can only hope for the best."
"Hope for the best?!" Jungkook cries his first words since the two doctors entered the suite, and looks up at them with tears now steadily running down his cheeks. "So we do nothing?!"
"Unfortunately, so." Jungkook finally loses it and collapses onto the floor on his knees, staring into nothing. "We have done everything we could for now, and we'd have to run some more tests in a few days. But right now, we can only monitor her. An induced coma is the best bet we have to let her body rest and the for treatments to take effect."
Induced coma.
Induced coma.
Jin's head is swimming with those two words as he walks closer to your prone figure and reaches out to mindlessly grasp your hand, but a hand stops his wrist.
"I'm afraid we have to advise you not to touch or make any skin-to-skin contact with Miss [Last Name] right now, most especially since you're her soulmate."
"What?" Jin asks dumbly.
"One of the side effects of the therapy is skin burns when the person comes in contact skin-to-skin with their soulmate, so skin-to-skin contact is highly discouraged."
Jin feels like his whole being wants to shatter. He can't love you, and he can't touch you? Was this how you felt all this time?
Before he can even make any further moves, the door to your suite opens, and in bursts Jackson, panting heavily.
Jin can't even find it in himself to be mad. After all, Jackson was there when you needed someone the most. No matter how it hurts him that there's another person who holds your hand, he can't do anything about it. They weren't there for you, he wasn't there for you. The least they can do is let you find someone else to hold when you need to.
Jackson crosses the room at record speed straight to you, grasping your hand delicately with a pained gasp. His manager is tailing behind and closes the door gently.
Jackson lets go of your hand gently and turns to the doctors. "Is she gonna be okay?"
"Im Jiho, Miss [Last Name]'s animaelogy physician." Jackson grasps the doctor's hand, as well as Doctor Choi's hand in a firm handshake. "This is Doctor Choi Daeseong, head surgeon for Yonsei."
"Jackson Wang." He smiles politely. "Is she gonna be okay?" He repeats.
"I assume Miss [Last Name] has made you aware of her treatments since she informed me she made you her next of kin?" Doctor Im asks.
Jackson's face darkens. "Yes, she did."
Doctor Im nods his head. "I'm afraid Miss [Last Name] is not doing so well right now. We would need to keep her in a coma for a while as we observe her and let the treatments take effect."
Jackson's eyebrows furrow. "Isn't that dangerous? How long would that take?"
"We'd need to assess first within the next few days. Right now, we cannot provide or guarantee until when she will need to be, but we'll do our best, Mr. Wang. I can assure you that."
Jackson nods but turns to Jin, his gaze hardening. "This is your fault." He looks at Jungkook, then back to Jin. "Why are you two here? Who gave you the right to be here?"
"We're her soulmates," Jungkook says coldly, to which Jackson snorts. Jungkook gets up from the floor swiftly. "We have every right to be here."
"Do you, Jungkook? After you all left her, do you really think you still have the right to be here? And for what? To make sure she's dead?"
Jungkook takes an angry step closer to Jackson, his face painted with rage. "What did you fucking say, you asshole?!" Sejin, the doctors, and Jackson's manager step between them. "Say that again, you motherfucker. I fucking dare you."
"Isn't that what you came here for, to make sure she stays away for good? Isn't that what you wanted?" Jackson is red in the face as the security detail rushes to the room.
"I'm still her soulmate, know your fucking place!" Jungkook shouts back, Jin holding him back by his chest. "In the eyes of the law, we have every right to be here."
"You gave up those rights when you rejected her, so you can shove that law up your ass and fuck off." Jackson's manager holds him back by wrapping his arms around Jackson's shoulders.
Jungkook can vaguely hear the doctors speaking to Sejin, but he pays them no mind. "I'm not leaving her here alone, so you can go get fucked."
"Jungkook." Sejin holds him by his shoulders. "I think it's best if we come back another day."
"I'm not leaving her again!" Jungkook cries.
"We're all emotional, and it will not help [Name] if one of you ends up in the ER." Jungkook looks at your peaceful figure, unaware of the disorder around you, and it hurts him. He feels his hands yearn to touch you but he can't, he doesn't want to hurt you. "Come on, I'll take you and Seokjin home."
Jungkook's expression crumples as he looks at Sejin. "But—"
"We'll come back, I promise." Jungkook's breathing is heavy, but Sejin's expression is steadfast. "I promise."
Jungkook has no choice but to concede. He turns back to Jackson. "You can't keep me away from her forever. I'll come back for her."
Jackson opens his mouth to retort that you don't need them, but his manager stops him.
"I'll come back for her, and no one can stop me. Unless it comes from her mouth that she doesn't want me here, I will be here." Jungkook chances one more look at you before he shrugs off the arms around him and stalks out of the room. Jin, who had been quiet all throughout the ordeal takes one good look at you before following suit, not even sparing Jackson a glance.
No one can keep them away from you. They'll stop at nothing just to do what they should've done before—give you all the love you deserve. Until you tell them that you don't want them in your life, they'll spend forever to try and make it up to you.
And make it up to you, they will.
---
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More Posts from Animegeek256
CHOCOLATE FLAVORED CAKE pt 2 — ateez



PAIRING: ot8 ateez x gn!reader GENRE: fluff, slice of life
WORD COUNT: 0.8k (852)
WARNINGS: none
📝: i got sm requests for pt 2 so here u go😭
library pt1
you walk through the grassy fields in search for you sister haeun and your - or you should say her - eight other friends. you in fact did not want to see any of them, especially after they stood you up on your birthday. but haeun promised you that she had your favorite snack and that was all it took to convince you to actually go and see what she had planned for you.
after haeun announced to everybody that they’d forgotten your birthday, all nine of them were determined to make it up to you by planning a celebration where they’d actually be there! wooyoung and seonghwa suggested that they plan a picnic. yunho, on the other hand, wanted to plan something for just the two of you, however, he still agreed with their plan.
after what felt like decades you finally see the group sitting on a large blanket, beside a beautiful pond. your steps immediately slowed down the anxiety level in you growing rapidly. mingi was the first to see you, waving his hand excitedly signaling you to hurry up. because of this everybody else immediately acknowledged your presence.
“hi,” you greet, standing up in front of them awkwardly. “hi, (name)!” san smiled brightly showing his cute dimples and patted a vacant space next to him, indicating that he wanted you to sit beside him. and you do just that and you feel everyone’s eyes on you making it even more awkward, if that was even possible. yeosang who was sitting on your right, hands you a plate full of all your favorite foods.
the atmosphere was oddly quiet, it was like you were meeting them for the first time. after they grew distant from you weeks prior, you found yourself silent, like they were strangers to you. “c’mon, eat up!” san takes your fork and stuffs food into your mouth almost choking you and you don’t fail to notice wooyoung’s giggle.
you slowly relaxed around them and shared your food with both yeosang and san. but you felt a pair of eyes on you so you look up to make eye contact with yunho. when he realizes that he’d been caught staring he averts his gaze and continues talking with mingi. weird . . . “guys, let’s go walk to the dock now. the sun is setting!” haeun suggests.
yeosang helps you get up from the blanket and walks with you to the dock. “last one to get there has to buy us all ice cream!” wooyoung yells and runs past the rest of you, but nobody follows. “so.. who’s buying the ice cream?” san asked awkwardly as he jogged up following wooyoung. the remaining seven of you get to the dock just in time to see the sunset.
“it’s so pretty,” haeun comments as everyone stands on the dock in awe. evening came and so did the cold breeze. of course, you didn’t bring along a jacket with you and you were wearing a short-sleeved shirt but yunho immediately solves that issue. he lays his jacket across your shoulders, providing ample warmth to stop shivering. and even better - it smelled of his perfume. “thank you,” you mutter but yunho only hums in reply.

you don’t know how you were convinced to stay out after 11 at night, but here you are at a karaoke bar with your friends. you sit on the bench next to yunho and haeun, while jongho and hongjoong sing along to Only. needless to say you were beginning to get drowsy and it seems you were not the only one. yeosang was practically out cold on wooyoung’s lap and even he was fighting sleep.
“are you sleepy?” yunho asks, although he seemed to be fighting slumber as well. you nod in response laying your head on his shoulder and getting cozy in his jacket that you still had yet to return. “guys, i’m gonna take (name) home.” they were too tired to acknowledge him or anyone, so he opted to drive you home.
the drive was oddly awkward, even though you had just spent your whole evening together. you refuse to look at him from the passenger seat because you know that if you did the awkward atmosphere would become even worse. he stops at a red light, taking a small but noticeable glance at you. “(name)?” he finally breaks the silence. you look up at him, “yes?” he reaches into the backseat of the car, pulls out a neatly wrapped box and places it in your lap. “open it when you get home.”
you nod softly and return your gaze to the front, yunho turns into your driveway and you unbuckle your seatbelt. you bid yunho your goodbyes and a good night before you enter your house. before you even undress, you open the gift yunho had given you not too long ago.
it was a stuffed panda, with came with an even smaller box with a friendship bracelet. yunho also wrote a note, which read:
“happy (late) birthday (name)!! again, i’m sorry for forgetting. i hope you enjoy the plushie and the bracelet. -jy ♡”
Hongjoong: Chords and Keys


“Hongjoong,” you quietly knock against the recording room’s door designated for ATEEZ.
“Come in,” calls a voice from inside.
You smile as you carefully creak the door ajar and peek inside. You’re hiding a warmed tea you’d just brewed for your new crush, a usual routine you’d committed to in hopes of helping de-stress his voice between recordings. It hadn’t been too long since you and Hongjoong had started talking, but it was so obvious you were both pretty into each other.
“Thank you so much,” he says as he graciously accepts the mug from your hands. “You’re always the best.”
“Anytime,” you smile, your eyes tracing the papers and equipment scattered about in front of him. “What’s new with you?”
“I’m putting together a couple songs, just experimenting to see what sounds good and what doesn’t.”
“Your songs always end up sounding amazing, Joong.”
The tired boy smiles and lets out a sigh. He puts his head down for a moment on the keyboard, heaving a loud “I’m just so tired!” under his arms.
You walk over to stand behind him, offering a small neck massage as you peered over his lyrics.
He lifts his head and, to your surprise, takes your hands from his shoulders and pulls you forward.
Oof! Your face is now practically right next to his, your hands outstretched in front of you as he gently wraps your arms around his shoulders.
“Stay there,” he whispers, turning his attention to the MIDI keyboard in front of him, “let me play something for you.”
You find yourself now comfortably hugging him from behind as he begins with a simple chord progression, humming out a tune and singing a few lyrics between breaths here and there. The progression and slow singing soon develop into a beautiful song, his eyes closed as he sings every word, each line dedicated to you.
He then plays a pre-recorded track that he’d composed earlier as an interlude and keyboard solo that would be the finishing touch to this song.
“This song,” he said, placing one hand over yours as the peaceful soundtrack plays in the background, “I got inspiration for it from DPR’s song Kiss Me. I hope you liked it, because I couldn’t stop thinking of you.”
He grabs your hands and intertwines his fingers around yours, bringing your palms closer to his chest. He turns his face to yours, his lips grazing ever so gently against your cheek.
Is this really about to happen? Is all you can think in your head as you feel the soft lips of your crush against your skin.
You begin to gently turn to face him, closing your eyes as you invite your own lips to hug his.
The sweet and tender moment grew as each new kiss lasted longer and firmer than the last. You could feel him smiling as he placed kisses against your lips, the corners of your lips, your bottom lip, everywhere.
A couple minutes pass before his phone pings from the desk as a notification ensues, forcing Hongjoong’s focus back to reality.
“I’m sorry,” he says, looking down at the keyboard as the time on the desk clock flashed 11:47pm. “I didn’t mean to get carried away—”
You laugh and finish his sentence by planting a kiss on his cheek, hugging him tighter from behind as you took in every detail of the precious moment.
“How much longer do you have to work tonight?” You ask, looking over his papers.
“I could call it a night,” he responds.
You notice the darkened circles under his eyes, realizing he must’ve been exhausted.
“Hey,” you say, “I have an idea.”
“What’s that?”
“What if you sleepover at my place tonight? I have lots of extra clothes for guests, too.”
He smiles, pulling you in closer for another heap of kisses, his soft giggles answering your questions for the warm, peaceful night with your new boyfriend that would now surely ensue.


Cold War - JHS (PWP)

Pairing: Idol!Hoseok X Fem!reader
Theme: SMUT, PWP, NSFW (MDNI), some angst, established relationship au.
Summary: In which Hoseok fucks you for all the time he has lost due to his own mistakes.
Word count: 2196 (pure smut lol)
Warnings: explicit sex, rough sex, domish Hoseok, orgasm denial, cream pie, Hoseok ties her hands down y'all.
A/N: based on a request from the prompt list. The prompts are written in italics.
****************
There's a cold war that has been going on between you and Hoseok.
It was last week when he nonchalantly forgot that he promised you a piece of quality time and went out to meet his celebrity friends. When you tried to talk to him, he snapped. He shouted at you saying that you give him absolutely no space and privacy, that he has been feeling trapped with you in this house. It stung you hard when he said those words.
It was the first time in your two years of relationship when you saw Hoseok this much furious. And a person as lively as him, wouldn't say anything out of anger only. It made you wonder for how long he must have been feeling "trapped" to finally call you out like this.
It did hurt you like no other. You love him so much that you are ready to leave him for his good. And if he's really not happy with you then it's better for you to stay away.
So, you decided to give him all the space he deserves and wants. As a result, you barely show him your face, you've shifted to the guest bedroom leaving the shared bedroom all to him, you eat before he comes home, and leave for work early before he manages to wake up from sleep. He made no advances to talk to you even if you two live in the same house, so you concluded that he is fine and he finds it better and much less burdening without your presence in his life.
Nevertheless, you miss him and you want him to miss you too, to finally come to you. And if it doesn't go as you want then you will take the cue and leave him, even if it kills you inside and sucks the soul out of your body. It's better to get hurt than being an unwanted presence in someone's life.
However, what you don't know is that Hoseok is going crazy. Waking up to an empty bed without you beside him, coming back to home without you jumping on his arms, eating dinner alone, not being able to hold you close, inhaling your natural pheromones, venting out to you about his day, having a heart-to-heart conversation, melting his tiredness in your embrace, kissing you, groping you and fucking you till night cracks into dawn, everything has been taking a toll on him. He hasn't even seen your face properly since the night of the fight. He knows you are angry but at the same time it's the first time you have stayed angry with him for so long. And he simply doesn't know what to do about it.
But he knows what is the first step to take, which is apologizing to you for his behaviour. He promises he will melt your heart tonight. He will make sure at least you start to converse with him even if you stay cold towards him.
When Hoseok reaches home, he finds you in the kitchen. You have your earphones on. So, you don't notice him coming towards you.
You have been eating out since the fight in order to avoid your boyfriend. But your stomach started acting up against you. So you decided to cook at home instead. You are pouring chopped veggies into the boiling stew when you feel a hand on your right shoulder. You are not surprised, neither are you jumpy enough to hurt yourself. You know it's your boyfriend, his touch is tattooed in the back of your brain. You turn your face to meet his eyes. Giving him a small smile, you return to what you were doing.
"Hey," says Hoseok. But you don't hear him due to the high volume of your earphones.
Hoseok plucks an earphone out of your right ear and you turn your face to look at him again.
"You wanna say something?" You ask him flatly. Your tone is so flat, so devoid of emotions that it breaks Hoseok's heart. The lack of usual 'hey baby' or 'hey hobi' drops his heart to his stomach. But he knows it's his fault. So, he gives you his biggest possible smile as he backhugs you, burying his face on the crook of your neck.
He catches you off guard with his behaviour. It's not what you expected even though deep down this is exactly what you wanted all along. Your heart flutters at his cuteness but you are determined to make him play hard this time around.
"Baby, I'm so sorry for the way I behaved that night. I- I really didn't mean to say that stuff. I was just- frustrated." Hoseok mutters in your neck.
"It's okay. You don't have to apologize, rather thanks for being honest and showing me my place in your life." You reply immediately. You have practiced what to say in a time like this.
Hoseok detaches his face from your neck within an instant and turns you around all while making sure both of you are away from the stove.
"No, Y/N. I know I am the wrong one here but - trust me. You really are important. I can't imagine my life without you in it, baby. Only I know how I have been living these days, since you totally stopped talking to me." His eyes are glassy, you notice but stay reluctant.
"It's what you wanted, Hoseok. You wanted space, I am giving you so. There's absolutely no reason for you to suffer. You should be happy instead. And also, if you want me out of your life, tell me now and you'll see me gone before you wake up in the morning." You reply as calmly as possible.
"Y/N! How many times did I tell you not to talk about breaking up?" He shouts at you, yet again. But this time for a completely different reason. You see vulnerability in his eyes, the fear of losing you is there as well.
You know talking about break ups triggers Hoseok, and you are evil enough to use that now but there's no better way to give him a taste of his own medicine.
"But I feel like you want it. It feels like you want me gone." You reply, voice cracking a bit. No matter how much you tried to keep this hard exterior, the thought of losing Hoseok breaks you into half.
"No! Fucking no! Y/N"
"Show me that you mean it, Hoseok."
And within a heartbeat, you feel his lips crashing into yours. The kiss is urgent, passionate but harsh at the same time. Hoseok grabs the back of your head to push you towards himself even more. You don't kiss him back until grabs your ass and smacks it harsh enough to make you yelp.
You then kiss him back as your hands reach to play with his dark and silky hair. Hoseok leaves your neck and places both of his hands right behind your ass and pulls you up on him. You wrap your legs around his torso as he carries you towards your shared bedroom.
He drops you not-so-gently on the bed and starts looking for sometime in the drawer. Upon finding a piece of silk, what you recognise as your scarf, he marches towards you. His hands work fast as he strips you off and leaves you bare for his eyes. You don't utter a single word, you stay there as if none of it is mattering to you.
He then takes the scarf, pins both of your hands above your head and ties those with the scarf. That's when you open your mouth.
"What are you trying to do?"
"Trying to ruin you for every other guy. So that you can't even think of ending things with me." Hoseok says as he finishes tying you up. He then strips himself off. His cock stands half erected, you eye him shamelessly.
"I’m not letting you go until you’ve either drenched the sheets, or passed out.” Hoseok says briefly before he almost pounds on you and attacks your lips vigorously.
His hands run down through your sides and find your cunt. One of his hands grabs one of your tits as the other one runs up and down your slit. You start leaking right away.
His mouth leaves your lips as he places small kisses on your jawbone, your chin and then he bites down on your neck. You moan out loud.
His teeth worry the skin of your neck all while his fingers draw small circles on your clit. You suck in a deep breath, you know it's gonna be a long time tonight.
Hoseok's kisses trail down to your collarbone as two of his digits probs on your entrance. You hate to admit it but you are already getting weak. His mouth takes one of your nipples in as he bites down on it. You muffle a moan.
"Let me hear you, baby. Let me know how good I am making you feel." Hoseok says. His words slurs as his tongue plays with one of your hardened buds.
Without a warning he puts two of his digits inside your cunt. He doesn't waste time as he puts his fingers knuckle deep.
His muscle memory takes his fingers to that one place that gets you all weak. He presses down on your g-spot and you arch your back as a response. Your moans know no bound at this moment. You feel yourself getting close but you don't say anything, you don't wanna give him the privilege of denying your orgasm.
But Hoseok being Hoseok, knows your body too well, as a result he removes his fingers right when your walls starts to clench the fuck out of his fingers.
"You are cumming only once today and we are going to cum together." He grits through his teeth as he pumps his rock-hard cock. Ready to bottom you out.
He teases your slit by rubbing the tip of his cock on your clit. You hiss. This man really has the audacity of teasing you after denying your orgasm once already.
"Don't tease, Hoseok!" You warn him.
He smiles, as if it's no big deal but he complies with your warning.
He uses both of his hands to spread you open. Placing both of his hands on both of your thighs, he takes a look at your leaking core.
"You have deprived me of this pretty pussy for an entire week. All the week-worth fucking will be done today." Hoseok grunts as he takes his cock and puts that in, in one go.
"Ah! Hoseok!" You moan out loud. Your moans seem to encourage him to go fast from the very start so he starts rutting into you like an animal. You weren't ready for the pace. Your mouth opens but nothing comes out other than some gibberish. The bed starts to squeak violently, so much so that you think it might break.
His pace was too much already and now he started stimulating your clit with rough eight figures drawn by his thumb. You start to see stars. You are gonna cum within seconds if he keeps doing what he is doing.
"H- Hoseok, plea- please.. I can't take it! Go sl-slow" you manage to say somehow although you are drooling, crying and making a mess of yourself. Your tied hands takes your pain mixed pleasure to a different level as you can't even grab the sheets or scratch Hoseok to divert your mind.
Hoseok doesn't budge. Either he doesn't hear to you or he doesn't pay you any mind willingly. So you open your mouth again.
“I-I can’t take anymore, please.”
“You can take it, and you’ll do it graciously, one more complaint and I’ll edge you all month.” Your boyfriend growls. You open your mouth to say something but Hoseok shuts you up by placing his fingers on your tongue.
"Suck" he orders, you obey.
However, you feel yourself getting close once again and Hoseok too probably feels it. His thrusts lose rhythm and become rigid. You, too, start to clench around his shaft.
"Cum, baby. Cum on my cock." Hoseok breathes out. You cum immediately as he follows closely behind. He fills you up with his white, hot seed as you almost lose your consciousness.
His body falls on top of yours. You feel his cum all over your mound, thigh, and slit as his softening dick rubs against your body.
His chest presses onto yours as you both try to catch your breath. He unties your hand, throws the scraf away. He cups your cheek with one hand and stare into your eyes intently.
"I know having sex is not the right way to prove myself but… I promise, Y/N, I'll make it up for you. Just- just don't leave me. Please." Hoseok mutters right beside your ear. You know he is vulnerable right now and he isn't lying, not in a time like this. This intimacy isn't something you could lie beneath.
You smile at him and reply, "I won't."
His smile finally reaches to his ears for the first time in a week as he kisses your forehead as if to seal the deal.
****************
Taglist:
@phenomenalgirl9 @soraviie @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @sukunabitch
Yunho: Dessert Date Noted


Tiramisu, the folded note between your fingers had a handwritten address and instructions for you to meet at a particular dessert shop this evening.
The funny thing was, you had no idea who it was from.
You approach an elegant dessert shop, figuring this must be your set destination.
My only guess is I’ve been asked out on a blind date, you thought.
The only real reason you decided to come was because your curiosity got the best of you, and you really wanted to know who was responsible for having heart eyes on you at work.
The place is beautiful at night, the ceilings are decorated with ambient lighting, jazz music plays from the speakers all around, and it smells heavenly.
Perhaps this was a good move, after all.
You look around for a moment, but find that no one else is here alone. There’s an elderly couple at one end of the shop sharing a small slice of cheesecake, and a mother feeding her toddler in the other.
The note said they’d be here already… did I get the wrong place?
As you sit on a nearby table for two, you pull out the note to confirm the address. Yes, I believe I’m in the right place.
Suddenly, a low voice calls your name from behind you, almost startling you in your seat. You turn around to meet face to face with one of the artists your team worked for.
Jeong Yunho!?
“This has got to be a mistake,” you mumble, looking down at the note and shoving it deep within your pocket. There’s no way Yunho of ATEEZ sent me this.
“I didn’t mean to startle you,” he says smiling, “I’m just surprised to see you here.”
“Oh, of course. Thank you for the invitation,” you smile warmly.
“Invitation?”
“Yeah,” you awkwardly glance at his hand, noticing a note. It almost looked exactly like yours. You decide to pull the note from your own pocket and show him.
“I’m assuming you’re the one who placed this on my desk at work, since you’re the only person here that I know?”
“Oh,” is all he says, as he glances down at the note in his hand. “Well this is odd, because I found this note in my dressing room.”
He motions the note toward you and to your surprise, it’s the exact same handwriting and instructions written on yours.
Is this some kind of prank?
“I’m sorry, Yunho, but have we been—”
“Set up?” He finishes your thought, smiling at a mere realization that he might’ve suspected one of his members almost immediately behind this.
Of course we were, he thinks to himself, recalling how he’d mentioned to Wooyoung that your few interactions together had made Yunho dub you his work-crush.
“Well, since we’re already here, let me treat you to any dessert for the night,” he says softly, offering you his hand to take.


The evening progressed fairly smoothly. Yunho offered to treat you to tiramisu, one of his favorite dessert trays. The night was filled with fun conversations, embarrassingly ugly laughs, and many opportunities for you and Yunho to get closer to one another. Time had practically flown so quickly before you’d realized it was almost time for the shop to close.
“Yunho,” you say as you begin collecting your coat, “I can’t say I regret coming tonight. You’re really fun to be with.”
“I’ll be sure to let the matchmaker know,” he smirked.
“Wait, you know this secret matchmaker!?” You turn wide-eyed at the boy, lightly punching his arm.
“I could take a guess,” he giggles, looking down at the note and wanting to pinch himself for not recognizing the most obvious handwriting earlier.
“Well, I hope this matchmaker decides to bring us together again,” you smile warmly.
“You’d want to go on a second date?” The corners of his lips are practically quivering in delight.
“I’m just saying I’d hope so,” you say, looking back at the now-empty dessert plate on the table. “And I wouldn’t mind coming back here. I liked having a dessert date.”
“I’ll be sure,” he says, offering you his hand, “that the next note that pops up on your desk comes directly from me.” You firmly place your hand in his as he leans over and plants a soft, loving kiss against your forehead, leading you both out the shop and off to walk under the otherwise delicately-lit moonlight.
Knocked | ksj | (m)

❀ Pairing: Streamer!Seokjin x f. reader
❀ Summary: Living with people is difficult, but all things considered, your new roommate isn’t terrible. He cooks, he cleans, and if you had to be honest - incredibly attractive. But his habit of streaming until the early hours of the morning while yelling and making other questionable noises has pushed you to the limit. You’ve finally decided to risk your sanity and put it all on the line with a reckless bet in hopes of getting some peace and quiet at night.
❀ Word Count: 10,673
❀ Genre: Roommates to lovers, smut, humor
❀ Rating: 18+ Minors are strictly prohibited from engaging and reading this content. It contains explicit content and any minors discovered reading or engaging with this work will be blocked immediately.
❀ Warnings: Cheesy humor, Jin is an annoying gamer, a lot of game talk, stupid bets, explicit language, references to an ungendered ex partner, a very cheesy plot i like cheese, jin crossing a boundary but he apologizes okay!!! sexually explicit content including oral (m. receiving) vaginal fingering, nipple play, a lot of body fluids like a loooot of spit and drool, protected vaginal sex, fast sex because they’re both overwhelmed and honestly this is vanilla but they are CUTE!!!!
❀ Published: January 19, 2023
❀ A/N: SHE IS HERE AND SHE ISN’T BEAUTIFUL OR EDITED BUT SHE IS FINISHED AND CHEESY AND THIS JIN IS REALLY CUTE OKAY. My inner gamer went fucking nuts in this I am so sorry I really like playing Apex Legends and I got too deep into the game lore so hopefully people can appreciate that. These two were just thirsty for each other and both busted nuts quickly okay it has happened to me jgdhgijhd thats tmi okay HAPPY READING.
❀ Disclaimer: All members of BTS are faces and name claims for this story. This is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgment or representation of real-life people. Any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real-life scenarios.
Masterlist | Ask | Room for Rent Collab |
A crash and a yell startle you in the kitchen, the spatula in your hand clattering into the egg pan as Seokjin lets out an unintelligible string of cursing and yelling. Closing your eyes and taking a deep breath, you try and center yourself in patience. It’s not uncommon in your apartment for two to hear him suddenly break out into yelling, and it surely won’t be the last.
Kim Seokjin isn’t the worst roommate. Not by a longshot, when you consider the horror stories you’ve read in Reddit threads and seen on TikTok. He’s clean, he has an aesthetic eye for decoration, he’s an amazing cook, he pays his portion of bills on time, and he doesn’t steal food. Nor does he hog any of the common spaces in the house.
The negative? Seokjin is constantly gaming, which wouldn’t be a bad thing if he gamed quietly. Namjoon hadn’t warned you that Seokjin was a large-scale streamer before you moved in, focused on first-person shooter content and paid tournaments.
It had taken about three hours into moving in when he screamed for you to realize that there was no fixing that bit.
Meal finished and plated, you move to the dining room, sitting cross-legged in the chair and turning on the TV louder than necessary to tune out Seokjin’s hollering. You’ve come up with plenty of ways to tune him out, and listening to everything else on extreme volume is the easiest.
Your neighbors must hate you.
Halfway through your meal and eyes glued to RuPaul’s Drag Race, Seokjin comes trailing out of his room, drawing your attention. It isn’t a hard thing to do. For a grown man who is chronically wired to his PC, he is beautiful. The kind of beauty that is used in dramas and romantic comedies kind of beautiful.
Dark, soft hair that is usually left shaggy and air-dried from the shower but you know looks dashing styled back for parties, equally dark eyes that shimmer with delight when he tells a horrible joke that he thinks is particularly amusing, full lips that would earn the envy of Aphrodite herself - Seokjin is painfully, artfully perfect.
Except for the constant gaming.
“Wow, didn’t offer to make me breakfast?” he asks. It’s more of a jest than anything, popping the fridge open in search of a caffeinated beverage. “How little do I mean to you?”
“Check the microwave, nerd.”
He looks surprised, meandering to the appliance in question and opening the door to see a plate of breakfast for dinner inside. “Wow,” he sighs dreamily. “You really are my favorite roommate.”
“I’m your only roommate.”
“Well, you’re better than Namjoon.”
“Mmm. That isn’t a hard feat, I don’t chronically break pieces of furniture.”
Humming his agreement, Seokjin shoves eggs into his mouth, munching happily. “When are you going to finally play some games with me, huh?”
“Mmmm never.”
“You think I don’t know you have a little setup in there?”
“I like Animal Crossing. You like Apex.”
“Come on, I can teach you Apex.”
It’s a conversation you’ve had a million times. Gaming is the single thing that the two of you have in common. When you first discovered that Seokjin worked in the digital sphere and was a content creator for popular games online, you were a bit worried. It wouldn’t have been the first time you had been fetishized for so much as liking a game.
Thankfully, Seokjin was alright. He didn’t make it weird, and after a casual comparison of the things you liked to play, he decided that the interests weren’t common enough to be a huge pain in the ass about it.
He did really want to play at least once, with you though.
“I know how to play Apex,” you mumble, eyes flickering back to the TV. Your last situationship revolved around playing the stupid first-person shooter together. “I don’t like it.”
As in, you were absolutely never playing that game again after being worn out from it and having it associated with someone who kind of sucked anyway.
“How can you not like Apex?” Seokjin mutters, more to himself than anything else.
Thankfully he drops the subject, distracted by your show. He shuffles to the couch, where you join him eventually, both of you tucked into the cushions as you watch the show. For the most part, Seokjin is quiet, only peppering you with questions during the commercial breaks. You’re happy to answer.
It’s comfortable, your little life with him. You’ve almost lived together for a year, and despite the annoying gaming thing and his habitual bad jokes, you like living with Seokjin. You like having him as a friend, even.
Things are good.
-
Things are not good. You clench your jaw as you re-read the email, feeling the tension creep into your shoulders. You can already feel the headache that has not yet happened but is predestined.
If people would just read their emails before sending a snarky request with your boss CC’d-
Mark: Come by my office, please.
Sighing, you push out from the desk and head toward your boss's office. Your stomach flips uneasily, unsettled as you walked by the windowed offices of the executive staff. It isn’t that you’re afraid of your boss, but you certainly have been having a bad enough day without having to explain that if Alicia in accounting had just read your email she wouldn’t be confused.
At the appointed office, you tap lightly on the door frame. “Hi, still a good time?”
It’s obviously a good time, but for some reason, you feel the need to break the tension by clarifying. Your boss is a wide-set man who ushers you in with a wave. “Catch the door for me, please.”
The door shuts with a click and it feels like impending doom.
Sitting quickly in a chair, you wait with a racing heartbeat as Mark finishes writing an email. The silence is awkward so you distract yourself by looking at the pictures of him and his family on his shelves as if you haven’t seen them a dozen times, and looking at his nameplate and literally any other object in his office to keep from feeling uncomfortable.
The horrible 70s rock that plays softly in the background only makes it worse.
With a final click on his mouse, he turns to you and says, “Sorry about that, trying to get through all these damn sales contracts.”
“Sounds exhausting.” You have no idea if it is - sales isn’t your area of expertise. “I know they’ve been busy.”
“Tons of new clients, which is always great but the paperwork is a killer.”
“Makes sense.”
“What is Alice in accounts losing her mind about? I saw that you’re missing invoices for radio stations and it’s way past the cycle?”
“As explained in my email to Alice, the station in question filed for bankruptcy and has a halt on all their funds. This was something I communicated two months ago with accounting and legal. I believe you may have been on it as well, though perhaps I left you off.” You didn’t leave him off. You don’t leave him off any emails. “Those invoices are all going to be a mess until that’s sorted.”
“Look,” he sighs. “We all have a shit ton going on right now. One email letting us know that payment would be an issue isn’t going to cut it. You can’t assume that we see the emails. Was it flagged as high-importance?”
“Yes.”
And I mentioned it in three meetings and a sticky note, you think.
“See, it’s just not foolproof. It’s your job to overcommunicate these things. You can't rely on accounting or me to remember these things for you.”
You give him one slow blink. Then another.
“Understood,” you answer, throat tightening. “I will make sure to overcommunicate from now on, I apologize for the confusion.”
“Thanks,” he says, a dismissal. “Door closed on the way out, I have a stupid call to jump on.”
Door closed behind you, you wonder how anyone gets anything fucking done around this place. Because of course doing all of the things logical and reasonable to communicate a change in accounting isn’t reasonable. Going above and beyond and being responsible for other people not reading their email is now your job to compensate for.
Steam blowing from your ears, you march back toward your desk in a blind rage, fists open and closing. You don’t see it coming when Yoongi smacks into you, eyes glued to his phone and fresh iced-americano now coloring your blue shirt a nice shade of mud.
“Holy fuck I am so sorry,” Yoongi swears. “Shit - fuck - sorry.”
Cold leeches through you like a knife. You rush to the bathroom, Yoongi’s cursing and apologies drifting behind you. The press of paper towels lifts a little of the yellow from your shirt, but it doesn’t fix the sticky-cold cling of fabric to your chest and the unmistakable stain down the front of your outfit.
“Fucking perfect.”
-
Blessedly Seokjin isn’t home when you arrive stained in dry coffee, smelling like Starbucks, and sagging with a delightful mix of rage, wrath, and irritation. Like an angry little storm cloud, you move around the apartment, snapping cabinets closed extra hard and yanking your blouse off with a little more violence than usual.
A hot shower makes most of the tension bleed away, but not all of it vanishes. Wrapped in a towel and turned into a prune, you reach for the clothes on the counter and realized in your haste to peel yourself out of Yoongi’s coffee, you didn’t bring any with you.
It doesn’t matter anyway. Seokjin isn’t home, so you yank the door open and march toward your room, running smack into your second person of the day with a startled yelp and thankfully, a very tight grip on your towel.
“Why are you all wet?” Seokjin shrieks, wiping his shirt as though he could get rid of the you-shaped wet stain. “And naked!”
“I’m in a towel! Why are you here?”
“I live here!”
“I meant right now! You weren’t home!”
“Well, I do come home, usually! And I yelled I was home when I got here so you would hear me!”
“Well, I was in the shower!”
“Obviously!”
For a moment, the two of you stand there. You’re dripping a puddle onto the tile and the cold air has goosebumps breaking out all over your body. You shiver as Seokjin’s eyes flicker down for a split second before he’s looking at the ceiling and gesturing. “Well - go find clothes!”
“I will! Jeez!”
You storm into your room, slamming the door and pressing your back against it. Your towel is gripped tight in your fist, heart hammering. You’re both adults and while being in a towel in front of Seokjin isn’t embarrassing or scandalous, it was unexpected and new.
As you get dressed quickly, you can’t help but think of the way his cheeks tinged pink and the nervous way he shifted. It was… cute.
With clothes on, Seokjin seems a lot less nervous around you. He’s still a little stiff, you notice. You bump into him as the two of you navigate the kitchen together and he ducks his head, the tops of his ears red. You file the information away for another time, feeling your cheeks warm when you go to reach for a pair of tongs but he already has them held out to you.
It isn’t uncommon behavior. He’s known you long enough to know your habits around the kitchen, and you’ve cooked enough meals together to recognize the patterns in which the two of you move around the kitchen.
Music plays in the background, Seokjin humming along. Occasionally, he sings the words, voice low and soft over the notes.
“You have a nice voice,” you note as you flip the oven off. He’s always had a nice voice, but you’ve never said anything before. He raises his brows as you grab oven mitts. “You do,” you insist with a grin. “I promise I’m not lying.”
“A great voice to go with a great face right?”
“Ew, here we go.”
He moves out of your way as you open the oven, leaning on the counter and crossing his arms over his broad chest. “Maybe I should sing on stream. Do you think they would like that? People already think I’m the most handsome streamer.”
“Sure, maybe do some sort of caroling or something for the holidays.”
He pauses. “That’s actually not a terrible idea. What if I just called my friends who were streaming on Discord and started caroling to them? I could make it a charity thing and select streams based on donations.”
Placing the hot pan on the top of the stove, you glance at him sidelong. “Do you do charity streams a lot?”
“All the time. Most of the long streams I do are for charities.”
“So it’s not all just… earning cash?”
“No, I get plenty of that.”
“So why do you need a roommate?”
Seokjin leans over you, to pluck a fry off of the pan. He doesn’t move away immediately, eyes dropping down to yours as he sticks the french fry in his mouth. The warmth of his chest radiates through your shoulder where you touch and suddenly, you feel a buzz at his nearness.
It’s impossible not to drop your eyes down to his mouth as he chews. For a moment, you’re dazed by his pillow lips - they really are a marvel to look at. Then he’s smirking and murmuring, “For the cooking. Did you get these out of a frozen bag? Ugh.”
Spell broken you swat at him and he laughs, leaning away again. “I don’t like to be alone,” Seokjin admits. “Having a roommate is nice. Granted, I was supposed to be living with Namjoon until he and Jungkook decided to be in love and all that. Now I have you filling out the rest of his lease.”
“So you can afford to live alone in this city and don’t?”
“Hey, I also save a ton of money. I will want to buy a house one day. Consider yourself as a part of my savings tactic.”
“Uh-huh.”
Rooming with Seokjin had been of convenience. Finding affordable living in the city was nearly impossible - especially on your salary - and when Namjoon had announced after only two months of living with Seokjin that he and his boyfriend were getting their own place, it had timed up perfectly. You had been vaguely familiar with Seokjin at the time, and you desperately needed cheaper rent.
You’d never really asked why Seokjin had a roommate at all. He had a work-from-home job at a software company doing something that went far beyond your understanding, and he made a ton from streaming.
Seokjin plops down on the couch instead of the dining room table, a plate full of chicken nuggets and fries balanced on his knee as he pats the seat next to him without looking. You definitely went the easy route for dinner after your terrible day, and Seokjin seems to pick up on the fact that tonight is an eat-from-the-comfort-of-the-couch kind of vibe.
“Ugh,” Seokjin sighs as he watches Shangela get eliminated from the top four on All-Stars 3. “That is heartbreaking. She worked really hard.”
Seokjin has never really voiced being a fan of the show, but you have a sneaking suspicion he watches it because you are, and it’s something to bond over. Maybe you should play a round of Apex with him.
Instead, you say, “Yeah, she deserved it.” You pause. “Thanks for watching with me, tonight. I had a rough day.”
“Hmm. I can tell.” He leans and squeezes your bicep absently. “I’m here for ya.”
Though you say nothing, your insides do a little bit of a flip.
-
Glancing at the clock on the stove, you frown. Pausing your show, you pull up your phone, paging over to Twitch to pull up Seokjin’s stream. He’s been doing one of those stream-a-thon things again, and you haven’t seen him come out to eat since the morning. It’s well into the evening now.
Seokjin’s stream pulls up and you see him in the corner of his screen, the familiar lighting in his room glowing in the background. His room is surreptitiously clean, free of any garbage and clutter. His bed is always made any time you see it, and the beautiful tiles of pulsing lights above it make a nice ambiance for his stream.
Currently, he is focused, leaning a little too far toward his screen as he talks to his teammates. Taehyung and Jungkook, by the sound of it. There’s no evidence suggesting he has left his room today, which urges you to get up and head to the kitchen, closing out the stream.
In silence, you put together a small meal. A wrap, a small back of chips, and some damn water will do him some good. Pulling up his stream again, you wait until his match finishes and he’s leaning back, talking to chat.
A little nervous, you walk with food in hand to his bedroom door where you can hear his soft voice. You knock lightly and he calls you in. Carefully, you stick your head in and see him turn. You’re out of shot from his stream, but he’s confused nonetheless. You never interrupt.
Sliding the plate into view, Seokjin’s face lights up. He rolls away from the computer and comes over, his headset on his head still as he gushes, “Holy fuck thank you. You are literally the best. A goddess. A queen. Royalty. Angel among humans. I’m starving.”
“Yeah, it’s like seven at night idiot.”
“Yeah, whatever. Thank you.” He bites into the wrap eagerly, taking a few minutes to chew and swallow. He pauses and glances you up and down before smiling. “Really, thank you. That was incredibly thoughtful of you.”
“Uh-huh.” You glance at his screen. “Have a good rest of your stream.”
-
Jin: Left lunch for you in the fridge. I made extra this morning.
You look at the text and furrow your brow, toothbrush still popped into the side of your cheek. You continue absently scrubbing as you walk to the fridge and pull it open. Sure enough, there’s a glass dish with a sticky note on it and a smiley face.
Plucking the note off the top, you read it. Thanks for taking care of me. Now I’ll take care of you.
With a smile bright enough to light up the entire city, you go about getting dressed for work.
-
The smile doesn’t last long. Work drags on unsteady, tired feet, and once again, you are stuck in a slew of responsibilities that shouldn’t be yours, reading emails that are reiterating things already discussed, and joining meetings that should be emailed.
By the time lunch comes and goes, you realize that you haven’t yet eaten. Tucked in the small cubicle, you nibble on Seokjin’s homemade meal, eyes glued to the neverending scroll of budget tracking and invoices.
A raging headache lurks behind your eyes and though your lunch is superb - as it often is with Seokjin’s cooking - you can’t help but feel your frustration mount by the time your next meeting rolls around.
Meeting after meeting interrupts your afternoon, and when you finish your last one long past the time to go home, your nerves are fried and a high-strung feeling follows you all the way to your car as you scroll through all of the emails you have yet to get to.
Because of all the fucking meetings.
The trip home is silent. Your fingers ache with the grip on the steering wheel of your car and when you park in the lot of the apartment complex, you sit there for a moment, car off, world muted by the car doors.
Head pressed against the steering wheel, you take a few steady breaths. It feels like you might cry, which isn’t typical after a work day. But you’re frustrated and tired, and that goddamn headache is still looming in the back of your eye sockets.
Upstairs and in your apartment, you breeze past Seokjin who is in the kitchen. You mumble something about a migraine and he barely gets a moment to say anything before you’re in your room, door pressed shut. You lay in your bed without even taking your work close off, wrapping yourself in your blanket and closing your eyes.
The next thing you know, there’s something warm pressed against your brow. You frown and groan, rolling over and feeling several joints in your body pop. Your eyes flutter open and you see Seokjin leaning over you, making you flinch slightly.
“Sorry,” he laughs. “But it’s really late and you should eat. I know you have a headache so I brought you meds and a cold towel. And ramen. I make the best ramen.”
“Jungkook makes the best ramen,” you correct, sighing and leaning up a little. Your movements are stiff, tangled in a blazer and dress pants. “Ugh, I slept like this?”
“Jungkook does not make the best ramen. I will take that away.”
“Fine, fine.” You take the medicine from the nightstand and chase it with the water glass offered. “Thanks.” You look at all the things he brought you and your insides begin to melt. He lingers near the doorway, eyes soft, expression warm. “Thank you for thinking of me. I… wow.”
He shrugs, suddenly shy. “No big deal. Now eat the best ramen in the world or I’m going to have a fit.”
With that, Seokjin leaves you to eat your ramen in peace. The first taste is amazing, already warming you up. You realized you’re ravenous, pulling noodles into your mouth hungrily. Absently, you think that it is the best fucking ramen in the world.
-
“What’s with you?” Seokjin asks as you drag your feet slowly in the grocery store. Rarely do you shop together, but today is an exception. “You look like a zombie.”
You nearly shoot daggers at him. “I lost my headphones,” you snap. “Which means I have to hear your gaming all night.”
“Oh come on, I’m not that loud.”
“Watch one of your streams back, I’m sure you’ll disagree.”
He sighs, turning the cart as you walk down the spice aisle. “Sorry, I’m preparing for this huge Apex tournament. Jungkook and I have been practicing duos a lot and it’s been a bit frustrating. Everyone has fucking aim assist these days, I swear that console players are doing to ruin-”
“Jin.” He pauses his rant. “I’m just asking you to keep it down a little. I no longer have the means to ignore you… moaning weirdly during a game.”
“What?”
“You haven’t noticed? You kind of moan and yell. It’s… ask your stream about it.”
He stops walking, staring at you as you walk ahead. “I don’t do that.” You snicker and he makes a frustrated noise. “I don’t!”
Five minutes pass with Seokjin sulking about your comment. It’s when you’re in the milk aisle that he says, “So you’ve just been imagining me moaning on the other side of the wall, huh?”
“W-what?”
“Admit it. You’ve been thinking about me moooaaaning you’re having dirty thooooughts.” He sing-songs this to you, poking at your sides as you open the fridge to get milk.
“I am not.”
“It’s totally cool. I get it, handsome bachelor right on the other side of the wall, you’re bound to get curious and - oof.”
“Put this in the cart,” you deadpan, having hit him in the stomach with the gallon of milk. He takes it from you and obliges, though there is a shit-eating grin on his face.
Seokjin isn’t right, but he isn’t explicitly wrong. When you first moved in, you had been shy and wondered about the attractive boy who lived just on the other side of the wall. Once you had fallen into familiarity, though, there had not been anything there.
Except recently.
The last few weeks have felt like the two of you have reached a new level of shared living space. You had done things together before, but now you find yourself making all your meals with Seokjin, bringing him snacks during stream, waking up to him making you breakfast or having prepared you lunch.
And now you’re doing groceries together, which was something uncommon enough to make you wonder.
You think back to the gentle way he made you dinner and brought you medicine when you had a headache, the way that your insides had turned cotton candy at the action and house these days, your eyes lingered on him just a little bit more.
But no. Seokjin was your roommate, and you learned in your last situationship that you don’t shit where you eat. Which is why you moved out of the old apartment and in with Seokjin in the first place.
The rest of your shopping experience goes with mild teasing. You’re still a little bit on edge, but not enough to be truly mad, especially when he offers to cook dinner.
Once again, you find yourself nestled on the couch watching TV before he finally relents and announces he’s going to practice duos with Jungkook. He assures you that he’ll keep it down this time - he isn’t streaming, so you sure hope so - and vanishes for the rest of the evening.
When you get ready for bed, it is mostly silent on his of the wall. No yelling, but you can hear the soft lull of his voice. Oddly enough, it’s soothing, and you end up falling asleep with the barest sound of his hum through the walls.
-
Most nights, you can sleep through Seokjin’s yelling at the sudden sound of his knee hitting his gaming desk as he jumps up, a string of expletives laced with other unintelligible expressions of shock, horror, and frustration. Most nights, you can tuck your headphones in, and blissfully fall asleep to the sound of rain, hearing his insanity only once in a while.
Except now you’ve lost your headphones, you don’t have enough money to splurge on a new pair, and Seokjin has been practicing for a tournament for some extremely long stream he has coming up.
So now, you go nights without sleep. Nights where you drift off to dreamland after a long shift at the bar or studying for your dissertation. Nights like this, where you teeter on the edge between awake and asleep, and you’re startled straight out of your bed from a shout.
Heart pounding, you grip the edge of your bed, trying to get your bearings as Seokjin’s shouting echoes through the shared wall. You feel sick with the sudden rush of adrenaline and fear, closing your eyes for a moment as the room spins.
Gritting your teeth and ripping your blankets from you, you march to his room, stumbling as you try to get your bearings from waking up so suddenly. Your stomach does a nasty flip, churning at the unplanned activity as you pound your fist on his door.
“Open up, motherfucker!” You screech, hand slamming on the door without pause. “I swear, Seokjin, sometimes I just want to-“
The door rips open and you nearly knock him right in his chest. His very bare, very broad chest, lit up by the purple RBG lights on his headphones and strip lighting around his room to improve the ambiance of his setup.
“Holy shit, woman! What?”
You blink, momentarily dazed at what you came here for, distracted entirely by the firm curves of his pectorals, skin smooth and gold. Was Seokjin always this in shape or is it a figment spurred by the rush of adrenaline?
Finding your words is hard, your brain is scrambled and near ready to make dial-up noises at the site of your roommate’s bare skin. “We just talked about this,” you manage to spit out. “And you’re literally going to start screaming the same fucking day we talk about keeping it down?”
“I mean I’m sorry but damn. You don’t have to break the door down.”
“Then stop screaming!”
“You’re the one screaming!”
“Because I’m trying to fucking sleep! I have dealt with you yelling, cheering, slamming the desk and hollering and doing your little moan-scream for almost a year without saying anything!” You yell back, fists clenched and rage boiling. “I’m so fucking over it!”
“Then why have you never mentioned it before? You know, like an adult!”
Your mouth hangs open at the clap back. “Be for real. I am not the problem here.”
“Well if I’m the problem, why haven’t you communicated that? You’ve been here eight months and it took me asking you at the grocery store to fess up that I was bothering you.”
“I mean. Yeah, but-”
“So don’t yell at me that I didn’t read your mind and I had no idea I was bothering you. Or get headphones.”
“How about you start gaming at normal hours? Have you ever thought of that?”
He rolls his eyes. “You mean my working hours?”
“I mean between the hours before 11 at night, Jin!”
“Make me!”
“Fine!” You snap, rage pushing you over. “Shall we make a wager?”
This catches him by surprise. He blinds a few times, tilting his head. “What are you proposing?”
Crossing your arms, you nod to the computer. “You want me to play Apex so bad? Fine, we’ll make it a competition.”
“There’s no 1 v 1 in Apex.”
“Duos. Whoever gets the most kills wins. No shields higher than blue, no turning on each other. Just strictly kill count. If win, you don’t get to game past 11 pm anymore.”
“And if I win?”
“What do you want?”
“What can I have?” He pauses, looking you up and down. Something feels different as he does this. His gaze heavier. Darker. He licks his lips, your attention is drawn to the way the blue lights glittering on his wall turn the spit-slicked surface blue. “How about any favor at any time that I ask? Are we also trying to win as a duo?”
“Sure. No holds barred on how we get kills.”
Again, he examines you, trying to puzzle something out. Wordlessly, he walks to his computer and grabs his headset. The door is open to his room, showing that he just has his basic setup turned on, with no intention of streaming. “Jungkook I’ll hit you up tomorrow. I have to kick my roommate's ass.” Jungkook says something on the other side and Seokjin clears his throat. “Yeah, no. Bye.”
He returns, phone in hand. Your phone pings in your room. “Add me on Discord, I guess.”
Wordlessly, you spin and head to your room.
There are still things Seokjin doesn’t know about you. Like how you played his favorite game for a year straight, trying to impress your last roommate-turned-fuck-buddy with your skills. While it partially worked in your favor, their failure to commit to you gave you a sour taste about the game.
It’s been a while since you’ve played. Slower games are more your style, and you haven’t turned on your PC in a while, but as it starts, lights inside of the glass case glittering, you feel a shiver of excitement.
Your setup is not nearly as advanced as your roommate's, who has three screens, a massive desk and hi-tech camera, a microphone, and a massive custom-built unit that could probably power a tank. Yours is pre-built but sturdy, and you have a single screen with a modest keyboard and headset to match.
Glancing at the Discord user, you roll your eyes at what Seokjin’s written: WorldWideHandsomeJin.
“Weirdo,” you mutter.
You add him anyway, getting comfortable in your chair and hitting the call button. He answers immediately, his voice making the hair at the back of your neck tingle as he says, “So are you going to be my Discord kitten?”
“Ew, don’t ever say that again,” you mutter. Navigating your desktop, you start to update the game. “Give me fifteen. I have to update.”
“Really? Newbie.”
“Sorry I don’t play this game every second of my life. I haven’t played since I moved out of the last place.”
He hums, voice vibrating in your very nice headset. You turn him down a little bit, feeling just a little drunk from the rich timbre of his voice. “That was a… weird situation, huh?”
“A bit.”
“They play Apex that much too?”
“Not as much as you do.” He hums again. “Who do you main?”
“Loba.”
“Fine,” you answer as the program opens. “I’m playing Wraith.”
The game menu blares in your ears, making you squeak and reset all of your old settings. It feels weird to log on, pointedly ignoring the familiar username as you navigate your friends list to add Seokjin. He pops up and selects duos for you.
Your eyes nearly bug out of your head when you see his rank. “Diamond? Holy fuck do you touch grass?”
“Says you! You played enough that you hit Diamond in your first season too, nerd. It shows your historical stats. I didn’t know you had it in you.”
“Whatever. Ready up.”
Neither of you says anything as the system prepares to put you in a game. You look at his stats, raising your brows as you flip through. He’s historically hit the highest rank in the game, making you wonder why he’s dropped recently. He also has a ridiculous skin on his character, making you wonder how long he’s been playing.
Apex Legends is a first-person shooter game with a battle royale format. Similar to Fortnite, teams load into the game and pick up weapons and other materials to fight other teams the ring of combat gets smaller and smaller. With Seokjin’s selection of Loba guarantees that you’ll be able to stock weapons and ammo. With your selection of Wraith, you can get in and out of situations quickly and you’ll know when an enemy team focuses on you.
As the map loads, you can’t help but feel the tremor in your hand. Your leg bounces up and down as you wait, watching the dropship come into focus. You give Seokjin the power to drop your duo anywhere on the complex map. You almost expect him to launch immediately, but you’re impressed to see that he has enough patience to drop you a moderate distance on the map.
Which means fewer weapons, fewer shields, and fewer teams to kill. You frown as you navigate your character to land near utility boxes full of weapons. Does he think you need to take it slow? Or maybe he’s worried about giving you too many people to kill easily.
“Team to the north,” you comm, opening up boxes and selecting weapons, shields, and med packs. “What do you shoot?”
“Energy. Preferably the volt.”
“Volt here. Let me know if you see a flatline or sentinel.”
“You snipe with Wraith?”
“When she says someone’s aiming at me, yeah?”
He hums but does not comment the two of you use the map to navigate. You fall into a rhythm, using the controls feels sort of familiar. As you work your way toward the next ring, Seokjin startles you when he starts firing shots at a time looting that you miss. You flinch and whirl, but he’s already eliminated the pair.
“Two zero.”
“Whatever,” you growl, ignoring his smug voice.
Shooter, move your character in game commands. You dodge behind a box as an enemy team rattles off shots. Your heart pounds as you use a sniper to look in the direction of the shots, seeing the duo up on a tower. Lining up the scope, you click and hit a player.
“Knocked,” you call automatically. The second teammate makes a bad call and tries to get their knocked pair up. You line up the shot and click twice. “Knocked. Out.” You move your mouse and finish the other teammate. “Out.”
“Yeah, yeah, good comms whatever. We’re even.”
You grin. “Just trying to communicate to my teammate.”
He snorts. “Sure.”
For a few moments, the two of you navigate to a safe zone. When you see two teams clash, you don’t even think. Normally you’d wait for one team to finish off the other, but you’re in a competition with Seokjin, too. Suddenly, winning means more than just peace and silence.
“Knocked,” you call, sniping another player. “Out. Out. Knocked.”
“You motherfucker,” Jin hisses. “You’re supposed to - out - tell me when we’re going to push a team.”
“Hey, that was my kill!”
“You only knocked him!”
“Whatever. And I pushed them because I want to win.”
“I didn’t realize you were so good at this.” The two of you start looting the load out of the eliminated players. “You kept saying I don’t like Apex and here you are, really good at it.”
“Honestly, I used to like it.” Together, you traverse the map until you enter the next ring. Seokjin pauses to use Loba’s pop shop ability, a cache of weapons and materials in the local area showing up in front of you. As you sort through them, you continue, “But I used to play with my old roommate and I used to do it to impress them. As it turns out, being good at a video game does not a relationship make.”
“Hmm. Well if it makes you feel any better, I like you even without the Apex.”
“I meant I was trying to get them to like me romantically.”
“I know what you meant.”
You pause. Seokjin does not explain his statement, humming lightly as he picks up ammo and leaves the little shop running. He skips down the hill with his character, his happy little tune deep in your ear.
Nerves get the best of you in the next firefight with a team. You get knocked and screech into the headset, thinking that your chance to win is over. Seokjin, thankfully, takes pity on you and heals you after your near-death experience. But now he’s in the lead, and there are only five teams left.
I know what you meant.
The words sit heavy on you. While you are attracted to Seokjin you know it’s a bad idea. Roommates being anything more than roommates often brings other issues. You’d learned firsthand how poorly not defining a relationship could go. That was on you as an adult too but… you didn’t want something in between.
And you have no inclination of what he meant.
Seokjin wasn’t a very flirty person. Teasing you came easily enough, and he was always nice. He had been a little extra nice recently since you’d been spending more time together, but there wasn’t anything that would suggest he saw you as more than a roommate.
Two more people downed, and you were tied. The two of you were more into the game and less into the bet. Your interrupted sleep was long forgotten, and you leaned forward as you devised a plan, locking down a high tower where you could see enemy teams coming to escape the shrinking ring.
“Glad you got that stupid sentinel,” Seokjin mutters. “Who snipes with Wraith.”
“Shut up,” you shoot back, though you don’t really mean it. “Your second gun is a fucking wingman.”
“Because it’s like a one tap to the head!” An incoming team distracts him from arguing with you. “Over by that dino cage.”
“Got it,” you comm back. The second you shoot, you draw fire. “Oh my god do they have a Kraber?”
“Yeah, but they fucked the shot. You got this.”
Taking a breath - a little dramatic, you realize as you scope them - you take the shot. You tap one, but they have red armor. You curse, pissed you installed a fucking armor limitation, and duck behind the wall as the other team misses the shot with their kraber again.
“Best gun in the game and they can’t hit shots!” Seokjin laughs. “Imagine! Their buddy must be fuming.”
You scope again and tap the person again. “Knocked. Do we stand our ground or try and take them?” Another shot misses. “Can you keep a scope on that person you cracked and I can push? Other team is probably trying to wait it out.”
“If they see you?”
“Then you’re fucked but they’re not going to engage between two snipers. Maybe? I don’t know. Just do your thing.”
And you do your thing as Seokjin runs off toward the enemy team. They no longer have shots on their gun - which makes you roll your eyes, it’s the best gun on the map - and keep focused. Either they think you’re moving or they make a bad call - the healthy teammate tries to pick up their knocked ally and you take the shot.
“They’re both cracked.”
“Got it- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH OTHER TEAM.”
His screech makes you slam your knee into the underside of your desk. No wonder he does this all the time, you think, realizing that the disrupting noise is a lot easier to make than you originally thought. “Let them take the kill then!”
“Fuck that I want to win!”
“Ew is this about the bet still? Now I want to win the game!”
“That’s what I’m talking about! Ye of little fAIIIIIITH!”
It’s hard not to giggle as he breaks off into yelling, entering a firefight while you try to provide cover and miss your shots. “Stop fucking portaling where I want to shoot!”
“Stop missing!”
“Knocked motherfucker!”
“Got it!”
Seokjin finishes the two teammates as the knocked enemies on the other team expire. Both of you scream over your headsets. You shoot to your feet as the victory screen flashes. You don’t even wait - you bolt toward the door, your wired-in headset ripping off your head and nearly yanking you back as you go.
The door is already open as he yells loudly, jumping up and down and grabbing you by the forearms, jumping around in circles with you. It’s stupid but it’s fun, and you can’t help but feel elated as he shakes you wildly, screaming, “Yaaaaaaaaaaaaah!”
His hands are warm on your biceps, gentle and squeezing you excitedly. And then between one breath and the next, he’s pulling you toward him, pressing his lips to yours.
A shock goes through you. You freeze for a moment, completely taken aback and unsure how to react. Seokjin realizes what he’s done and immediately backs away, running a hand through his hair and tugging at the strands as he says, “Shit - I am so sorry. That was wow - that was a line crossed without your consent and I’m so sorry.”
Heat floods you from head to toe. Your heart slams against your chest and you stare at him as he fumbles over an apology, his face red as you feel. Your mind can’t catch up as the warmth spreads from your face to the rest of you.
“I’m genuinely so sorry, I just got really excited and-”
“What did you mean earlier,” you cut him off. “When you were all I know what you meant. Look I… really don’t want to make this living situation weird.”
“Totally understand, I’m so sorry.”
You chew on your lip, looking at him. He looks earnest, eyes round and expression pleading. Your lips tingle where he kissed you, so quickly that you’ve already forgotten. Part of you wants to tell him to kiss you again. It was nice. And the flip in your stomach was… good.
But the part of you speaking now says, “I had fun gaming with you. Apology accepted. I am super tired though, so I’m going to go to bed okay?”
“Yeah. Listen, I am so sorry. That won’t happen again and I just - that was not cool of me at all.”
“It’s okay.”
“It wasn’t.”
You offer a smile, still nervous, fingers twitching. “I know you didn’t like, mean anything by it.”
He frowns. “Well I did but that’s my issue.”
Your heart is a stone skipping on the smooth surface of a pond. “What does that mean?”
“Look,” he sighs. “I don’t want to make things weird, alright? I harbor a bit of a crush on you and that was honestly absolutely not okay for me to just-” He gesticulates wildly with his hands. “It was an inconsiderate thing for me to do.”
A crush. Your breathing hitches and you rub sweaty palms against your pants, nodding. “It’s - we’re okay. We’re fine.”
Seokjin nods, nibbling on his bottom lip as he stares at you, red-faced and nervous. The silence turns awkward, your mind blanks and buzzes as you try to digest his words.
Crush crush crush crush.
“I’m gonna go to bed,” you announce abruptly, needing to escape the room to breathe for a moment. He nods, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly as you rush out. “Night!”
Behind locked doors in your room, you cover your face, feeling the way your cheeks are flushed. You do some deep breathing, trying to regulate your heart rate as your brain spins its tires on Seokjin’s words- confession.
He confused. That he has a crush.
For a few moments, you just lean over and pant, trying to think how you feel. Your stomach is a bundle of nervousness and your hands are a little shaky. But you’re not upset. In fact, you smile a bit, thinking of the way that Seokjin had turned shy and the way his lips had felt soft for that split second of a chance.
Straightening, you stare at the wall between your bedrooms. Seokjin is right there. Has been right there. And has admitted to liking you and is sweet and kind and fun to hang out with and-
It might be a bad decision. You’ve been down this road before. It ended up with you nursing feelings and deciding that feelings with roommates was a bad idea. But your last roommate didn’t have feelings for you like that. They liked the sex, but that was where the attraction ended.
So maybe -
You knock loudly on Seokjin’s door. There’s some shuffling on the other side and he opens it, brows furrowed and a little breathless. Before he can ask what you’re doing, you’re pushing past him and asking, “When you say you have a crush on me what do you mean? In the physical, only attracted to your appearance kind of way, or like the would date kind of way?”
“Well I am physically attracted to you,” he answers slowly, turning to look at you. “But I also like you. You’re funny and incredibly kind, and you’re easy to live with. I like the way that you make your hashbrowns a little extra crispy and crunchy, and I like that you think of me when you do things.”
“So you like me?”
“Yes, I think I… included that?”
You lick your lips, taking a shaky breath. “So you don’t want to just fuck me no strings attached?”
He blanches. “No. I don’t. Look I know I made you uncomfortable-”
“Kiss me.”
“What now?”
“Kiss me!”
There is a fleeting smile Seokjin gives you that later, you’ll think on with a fluttering heart and breathless laugh. But now, all you can think about is the gentle touch of his hands as they cradle your face and the delicate way his lips press against yours, pillow soft and sweet.
Seokjin smells like his body wash, the sage and juniper intoxicating as you wrap your arms around his neck. His skin is warm as you press your palms against his skin, his pulse throbbing underneath your thumb.
The kiss is chaste, just a firm press of lips and a surprised noise shared between the two of you. Tentatively, you pull away, eyelashes fluttering as you look up at him. Seokjin’s eyes are swimming pools of darkness framed by long lashes. He’s so beautiful, but up close he’s deadly, flecks of gold glittering in his irises.
“I just,” you whisper. “I don’t want it to be weird but I also… want.”
You don’t have to explain. Seokjin’s grin is easy, nodding. He gets it. He gets you. So he leans down again and pulls you in by the waist, fingers curling in the hem of your t-shirt as he tugs you toward him. The motion makes you gasp and he takes the chance to turn the kiss from sweet to carnal, tongue sweeping into your mouth.
Seokjin kisses you slowly, tongue curious and gentle. Your head spins as you kiss him and you can barely breathe, so full of him and thoughts of him and the taste of him that you grip him tight, desperate not to fall over.
The irritation from him waking you up is long forgotten as he tugs you closer. Your hips press against his, mouths sliding, a mix of gentle smacks, spit, and gasps for air. A buzz tingles through you as you nudge Seokjin toward his bed and he responds immediately, backing up and pulling you with him.
When the back of his legs hit the bed, he falls backward. The two of you become a tangled pile of limbs and kisses and giggles, but you find your place as you slot your knees on either side of his narrow waist, palms flat against his chest and the steady beating of his heart.
There are stars in his eyes when he looks up at you. For a second, you just look at one another, his hands rubbing up and down your thighs and his eyes locked on your face. His lips and face are rouge, hair messy. You grin and lean down, pressing your lips against him again.
Kissing Seokjin is invigorating. You can’t help but let little noises slip from your mouth. His fingers press into your thighs, dimpling the flesh as he groans, hips twitching upward for friction. The bulge through his sweatpants makes you squeak and you break the kiss, wiggling your hips down to press against his clothed cock.
“Ugh,” he moans, eyes fluttering shut and head pressing back into his mattress. “Don’t do that. I’m so fucking hard.”
“Do you want some help with that?”
His gaze softens and his thumbs slide back and forth on your thighs, caressing gently. “I want whatever you want. Nothing, everything, something. Whatever you’re comfortable with.”
“Well right now… I really want to suck you off.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Uh huh.”
Without breaking eye contact, you drop and slide your hand from where it presses against his chest downward. His abs twitch under your hand as you dance along his over-warm skin. His breathing has turned faint and breathy, body nearly trembling as you brush your fingers along the trail of hair leading into his sweatpants.
Watching him is hypnotizing. Seokjin’s lips part slightly as you slide your hand underneath the elastic, brows shooting up when you brush the sticky tip of his cock.
“No underwear?”
“They’re - nggg - restricting.”
His shaft is long and smooth, your fingers brushing along the underside, tracing a vein. You’re impressed by the sheer size of his dick, wondering if you’re going to manage to not choke, but the sound he lets you when you wrap your fingers around him and grip him tight erases the apprehension.
“You sound so good like that,” you breathe, giving a loose-fisted stroke toward the crown, beaded with precum. “Also you have a sizeable dick.”
“Sizeable, huh?” You brush your thumb over the tip, nail gliding over his leaking slit and he lets out a loud moan, making you grin. “Take it out and see how fucking sizeable it is, hmm?”
It’s hard to take him seriously with how ridiculous he sounds, but you slide down the bed, gently getting onto your knees. Using both hands, you tug at his sweatpants, looking up at him through fluttered lashes.
And… suddenly it’s not a joke anymore. Your mouth waters a bit at the side, his tip swollen and needy. His thick, and you know how good it would feel to just sink down on top of his length, filling up the throb that aches between your legs.
Pressing your palms firmly into his thighs, you lift yourself up, dipping low to run your tongue along the thick vein that runs up the bottom of his shaft. He lets out a sinful growl, hands fisting the sheet and gasping as you watch him struggle.
At the tip, you slid a hand up, gripping him firmly as you suckle the dark, swollen flesh into your mouth. His precum is salty on your tongue and you hum, eyes fixed on the rapid rise and fall of his chest and the blush blossoming from his neck to his pecs.
Seokjin is beautiful under the assault of your mouth.
Suckling gently, you watch his reaction as your tongue lazily circles around the sensitive tip of his cock. His hips wiggle back and forth but he never bucks up into your mouth, never thrusts deeper than you’re willing to go.
“Please,” he whispers and it comes out as an almost whine. “More.”
You give him more, gently sinking your mouth down on him. It’s a stretch but you manage, careful to mind your breathing as you bob gently, hollowing your cheeks for added suction. Expletive-laced moans drip from his mouth, his eyes squeeze shut as you continue to suck gently.
Drool runs out the sides of your mouth. You let it, the stickiness of your spit and his presume slicking down his cock helps you take more of him in his mouth. When his tip brushes the back of your throat, he nearly growls, fully writhing underneath you now.
Seeing him like this is addicting, worked up and sweating, and falling apart. What you can’t fit in your mouth you grip with your hand, mouth, and fingers stroking together in time to work him up. Your mouth buzzes around him in a self-satisfied hum.
Seokjin can’t help himself. His hands leave the sheets, one hand going to the back of your head, fingers pressed firmly. He doesn’t push or pull, his grip just firm and begging. The sound as you let him thrust a little is sinful and wet, the cough-choke of your throat accompanied by stilted curses.
Suddenly, he pulls you up. Cum-mixed spit dribbles down your chin, mouth feeling stretched and swollen as you look up at him. His sweats are around his ankles, abs and thighs flexing as he leans forward, urging you upward.
Your mouths meet in a heated smack of cum and spit and moans and teeth. Your mind is spinning as he cups your face fiercely, pulling you to your feet and up onto his naked waist. His hands pull at your shirt and you yank it fiercely, breaking your messy kiss just to toss it.
Seokjin’s hands are warm and starving for you and vicious as he pulls your bralette off, adding it to the messy pile in his room. Steady hands cup your breasts, his eyes glittering as he makes a noise. “Fuck,” he mutters. “Come here.”
You fall forward but his hands steady you, lifting his head to catch a nipple with his mouth. It sets you alight, electricity snapping to life from the motion. You moan, head thrown back, eyes rolling as he nipples lightly on your nipple.
“Fuck,” you squeak. The heat between your legs hurts, your cunting throbbing for him. “That feels so good.”
He hums, letting go of the hardened peak with a gentle scrape of his teeth, moving his mouth to lavish your other breast. His thumb brushes back and forth over the glossy peak, keeping it stimulated.
You tremble in his grip, seated in his lap as he places luscious sucks across your chest.
“You’re beautiful.” Seokjin’s words are mumbled in damp kisses against your collarbone. “You’re smart and sweet and generous and stunning.”
“You’re beautiful,” you answer. It feels stupid to say, but it’s the only thing you can come up with. Everything feels fuzzy and you’re drowning in the praise. “Why is your discord WorldWideHandsomJin?”
“Shut up.” He rolls the two of you over, a whirlwind of limbs and giggles. “Cause I wanted it to be, and it’s true.”
“It is,” you agreed, gasping as he slides his hand into your pajama shorts. His fingers brush over your damp panties, and he huffs a laugh when he feels how sticky wet you are. “More.”
He hums and applies more pressure, but it doesn’t relieve the ache. “No,” you whine, clawing his chest. “Please.”
“Because you said please.”
With a swift hand, he pulls your shorts and underwear down. You don’t have time to shiver at the cool air of his room hitting your pussy, his fingers brushing up and down. “God,” he groans, dropping his head against the side of your neck. “You’re soaked, baby.”
Pleasure sparks as he thumbs your clit in gentle circles. You feel arousal flood the pit of your stomach, cunt aching and leaking as he slides a finger up and down, applying pressure to your hole before gently sliding into your cunt.
It’s not enough. You get breathy all the same, the feel of his finger stroking your front wall making the world around you melt. Your limbs feel heavy and you shut your eyes, feeling the way he strokes your g-spot over and over again.
“Another,” you gasp, hips bucking upward. “Please, more.”
“Yeah?” he asks. “Greedy pussy needs more?”
His filth makes your mouth pop open. He complies, though, sliding in another finger and fucking into you properly. He lets you roll your hips upward, trying to ride his hand as you chase the feeling in your stomach.
It feels like you can’t get enough air, heat trapped between your bodies, static sticking to your skin. Seokjin feels like heaven and fucking hell, skin sticky where your bodies touch, thrumming with energy.
And it’s so much - almost too much. You want him closer, want to be fuller, want the snap of his hips. You dig your fingers into his biceps, mouth brushing against his, words mumbled between pressed lips, “Please.”
With a slick sound, he pulls his fingers from you. Immediately you miss the feeling, but you’re rewarded as he brings shine-slicked fingers up to his lips, sucking them into his mouth. He leers around his fingers, eyes dark.
“Yum,” he whispers, bending down and licking into your mouth, letting you taste yourself on his lips.
For a quick moment, he fumbles in his nightstand, pulling out a condom and breaking the foil with a soft crinkle. He’s painted a soft blue in the lights of his room, the changing colors making him a mirage of neons and soft colors, a haunting and stunning creature all at once.
Seokjin shuffles you carefully up the bed, peppering your skin with kisses as he goes. Reverent hands stretch your legs wide open for him as he slots himself against you, giving shallow thrusts so that his cock slides against your messy fold. You whine, needed more stimulation, needing to feel full to relieve the ache.
Grabbing the base of his cock, he strokes upwards again, letting his cockhead catch on your trembling hole. A stream of expletives falls from your lips as your head falls backward, your entire frame vibrating as he slowly slides in. You’re so wet that it helps, but the thick girth of him burns all the way until he is fully sheathed and your walls are fluttering around him.
“Shit, you’re fucking squeezing me.”
“Cause your cock is fucking big!”
“Am I supposed to apologize?”
“No, but please fuck me.”
You need the slide of his shaft against your walls, need to feel the way he hits so deep it’s like he’s in your fucking stomach. Seokjin starts a slow but purposeful pace, pulling all the way out before pushing back in, sliding his hands under your as to lift you slightly. The angle allows him to fuck your spot as he thrusts in, your limbs going slack as the feeling of an orgasm winds from just a few strokes.
Seokjin fucks you with purpose, stroking a little faster. Sweat beads on his chest, hair clinging to his forehead as he bites his bottom lip, stomach flexing. You watch him through half-lidded eyes, your fingers wrapped around his wrist where he holds you, practically pulling you onto his cock as he fucks you open.
It’s mind-numbing, everything else fading away as his room swirls in colors, punctuated by the snap of his hips against your wet ass and your high-pitched moans.
You wish you could be more of a participant, but the way he makes you feel has the room spinning. He fucks you down into the mattress, the slide of your skin against his sheets added friction. Your head hits a pillow, knocking it sideways, your hand trying to find a grip on anything. It finds the wall and you press against it, feeling the squeeze of your breath in your lungs and the coil in your stomach.
“That's it,” Seokjin urges, one hand leaving your ass to slip between your legs. He circles your clit and your eyes roll back in your head, the roaring feeling of your orgasm coming closer and closer. “Fuck your feel so fucking good - you look so fucking good just taking my cock like this.” He is the vision you think. Brow furrowed, lip tucked between his teeth, all tan, flushed skin and twitching muscles. You can't remember the last time you were fucked into mindlessness, no chance of cognitive thinking at your fingertips. The filth that leaves his mouth only sends you spiraling further, admiration-laced curses punctuated with moans.
You can only moan back in response, most of the sound stuck in your throat. You think you’re babbling now, mouth agape, eyes squeezed so shut that colors explode across your vision. He fucks you hard but at a medium pace, each thrust supported with his full weight, hitting so deep that you can’t breathe.
When you cum, it’s like a freight train hits you, the world going absolute white noise and numb. You lose yourself in the feeling, everywhere and nowhere all at once. You’re aware of the way your pussy pulses around his cock and through the buzz in your ears, you hear him curse, gasping your name as he cums just as hard.
You have no idea how long it takes for you to come back down. You barely feel your limbs, the tingle in them like when your foot falls asleep but far more pleasant. You roll your head over to find Seokjin breathing deeply, skin glowing with sweat. His eyes flutter open as you stare at him and he grins, tired but genuine. Your stomach leaps.
“I swear,” he mumbles. “Next time I will last way longer than that. But fuck.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever cum that hard,” you admit, voice hoarse. “I think that is why they call it le petite mort. Holy shit.”
He laughs and he pulls you in. With the shift of your limbs, you feel how sticky and wet your legs are, thighs pressed together in the mess. You make a face at the feeling, no longer finding it attractive now that you’re not actively fucking, but he kisses you and you immediately forget about it.
“By the way,” he mutters, voice deep. “I won the bet so you owe me a favor.”
You grit your teeth, realizing that he did win by a single kill. “Fine. What’s your favor?”
“Not much, just want to take you out somewhere nice. Buy you a beautiful dinner. Learn all of your embarrassing stories from middle school and if you had an emo phase.”
“Did you have an emo phase?”
“You’ll only find out if we go on a date.”
You smile. Your mouth hurts from the kissing and the stretch of his dick, but it doesn’t matter. You brush the sweaty hair from his face, his eyes fixed on your reaction. “Of course, I’ll go on a date with you.”
“Hmm. Good. Now come on, I wanna fuck you in the shower.”
“That I can agree with.”