Find Meaning. Distinguish Melancholy From Sadness. Go Out For A Walk. It Doesnt Have To Be A Romantic

“Find meaning. Distinguish melancholy from sadness. Go out for a walk. It doesn’t have to be a romantic walk in the park, spring at its most spectacular moment, flowers and smells and outstanding poetical imagery smoothly transferring you into another world. It doesn’t have to be a walk during which you’ll have multiple life epiphanies and discover meanings no other brain ever managed to encounter. Do not be afraid of spending quality time by yourself. Find meaning or don’t find meaning but “steal” some time and give it freely and exclusively to your own self. Opt for privacy and solitude. That doesn’t make you antisocial or cause you to reject the rest of the world. But you need to breathe. And you need to be.”

— Albert Camus, from Notebooks, 1951-1959

I feel like I spent half of my life in fear, and now, I have few memories of the things that make life worth living.

My mom , my mom, I love that woman

I am that bitch

i'm gonna fucking fight my demons and heal from this shit and someday i'll live in a humble home with my partner and our moms (ofc boundaries will be enforced, we're all grown adults) and our furbabies. my partner and i will have a game room with his black with purple accent pc/gaming setup and mine would be white and pink. we'd both be pursuing our passions, him- food and gaming, me- art and animal welfare. we'd spend the rest of our humble human lives enjoying food, talking about mundane things, singing love songs to each other, gaming, probably watching the moon and stars at night, having movie nights and simple dates and loving each other.

i know nothing is certain and nothing is ever set in stone. things may still change but i wanna stop fucking worrying about things that aren't happening yet and just be here in the present. i want to really LIVE.

STOP THINKING THERE IS A DEADLINE. THERE IS NO DEADLINE. TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND TAKE YOUR TIME.

“When feeling overwhelmed by a faraway goal, repeat the following: I have it within me right now to get me to where I want to be later.”

— Karen Salmansohn