Friends

Friends

I feel like I’ve been stabbed

I thought they were my friends

Like Oli said: “True friends stab you in the front”

But are they actually true friends?

I sometimes wonder if that was just my perception

It hurts to see them now turn their backs on me

While I clutch my wound, the warm stickiness dripping through my fingers

They didn’t even notice

And I know I will probably crawl back to them

Even though I have been hurt time and time again

Being in love with someone who doesn't exist is definitely worse. If it's just the case that they don't know you exist there is still the teeniest tiniest of possibilities that that might change. But if it's a fictional character that chance is zero. And it hurts to know that you will absolutely never meet them and that they will never fall in love with you like you fell in love with them.

idk what’s worse.. being in love with someone who will never know you exist or someone who doesn’t even exist

I’m the broken Pringle on the bottom of the tube

Middle of the night

Sitting alone in my room

Getting drunk on orange juice

The snake

They always warn you of the snake.

Their words: “Be careful my child, it’ll bite you. Don’t you see the pure evil in its eyes?”

Like all children we of course disobeyed their orders and we set out to search for the snake.

At first I didn’t trust it. That changed when it started whispering in my ear.

The danger of being around it made the adrenaline rush through my veins.

But it never hurt me. It became my companion, my friend.

It might’ve hurt you but I never noticed. And one day you didn’t join me on our visits anymore. And I had the snake all to myself.

The smoothness and coldness of its curves calmed me down and warmed my heart.

The snake slowly and secretly slithered its way into my heart.

And now I can’t spend a day without thinking of its green scales.

It will slither its way into your heart too.

Inspired by Riverdale

Just a casual affair ~ Aramis x reader

Picture not mine

Word count: 1,021

Warnings: none as far as I can see

A/N: I hope you like it, it’s the first fanfiction I have written in a long time

The birds were chirping and the sun shone through the slightly open curtains dancing on the fabrics of the bed. It must‘ve already been noon. I stretched myself watching the man standing in the corner of my room.

Aramis was busy pulling on his trousers and tying them. His beautiful face was covered by his hair. Oh, how I wished I could run my hands through those luscious brown locks before he left.

Grabbing the lightly coloured sheets I pulled them closer to cover my bare body.

“Aramis.” As I mentioned his name he looked up, his brown eyes were like molten chocolate looking intently at me. Moving so that I could see him better I continued: “I know I’m probably not in the position where I should say this.”

The musketeer frowned trying to figure out what I was on about.

Pulling the cream coloured fabric around myself I stood up walking towards him. “But … but”, I took a deep breath steadying myself before carrying on with a firm voice, “I can’t do this anymore. You coming over on some evenings, staying the night and then just leaving in the morning without really saying anything. This has to stop.”

He opened his mouth, his wonderful, experienced mouth that had kissed me so many nights, trying to say something. “No! I have to get this done and over with! So just leave and never come back again”, I plead, “find yourself another girl, but not me.”

After getting out that last sentence I shoved the man I loved so dearly out of my room and into the hallway of the house that belonged to the lady that I was working for. I immediately closed the door behind him, sliding down the back of the door until I sat on the floor clutching my knees to my body.

Tears started rolling down my cheeks dropping onto my bare arms. I didn’t want to let him go. Seeing him leave the room hurt so badly. Being in love with him, seeing him (even as shortly and seldom as I did), seeing his smile, the twinkle in his eyes when he talked to his comrades or about fighting, was the best time I had – it made my heart beat unsteady and do somersaults, it made me smile unconsciously.

But this decision was better for me. If I carried on this relationship like this it would only end up hurting me even more. I knew he wasn’t in it with his heart. To him I was just another girl. Just another girl to add to the list of girls he had a liaison with. I wasn’t important to him and I decided he would finally not be important to me either. I would finally move on and forget about all of this.

Having the strength and courage again I stood up and got ready for the day.  

~time skip~

The next day the handsome musketeer stood in front of the door to the house where (Y/n) worked. Aramis was about to knock, hoping to be able to speak to the (h/c) haired maid, when suddenly the door was opened and (Y/n) stood there holding a bucket of dirty water in her hands. She was shocked to see him there.

“(Y/n), we need to talk!” The girl moved past him without paying him any attention. Aramis turned around following her. After she dumped the contents of the bucket, the musketeer gently laid his hand on her arm turning her around.

“(Y/n)”, he said softly looking at her with soft eyes. Forcefully his hand was pushed from her arm. Following her back to the house he continued: “I can’t just go without ...”

When the pair reached the front door (Y/n) abruptly turned around. “I told you to stay away! I can’t be around you! I have to protect myself and my heart from you and your doings before it’s too late”, she ranted angrily and slammed the door shut right in his face. The hurt was evident on Aramis’ face.

~time skip~

It was a few days after my last confrontation with Aramis. The sun was shining and the birds were singing. Life had gone on and I had things to do. Going to the market was one of my favourite tasks. The market place was always bustling with people and there was always something to see. I loved looking at the colourful stands.

At the moment I was looking at the beautiful fabrics of the one merchant -  a smile on my face- luxurious fabrics I would never own, but I still loved marvelling at the amazing pieces of textile, dragging my fingers over the smooth and silky fibres.

Suddenly a hand grabbed my wrist and pulled me into a nearby alley. Turning around I saw a familiar moustached face – Aramis. He had me pressed against the stone wall holding me by my shoulders.

“I asked you to keep your distance!”

Leaning down slightly to be on the same height, he chuckled, that familiar twinkle I loved in his eyes and stopped me from talking. “You really are stubborn”, he said with a smile in his voice, “I’ve been trying to tell you something important the whole time but you just keep interrupting me.” I looked up at him confused as he was talking.

“I wasn’t content with our relationship either. I too have been wanting to take it further, I was just too scared you didn’t and that when... if I did something about it our relationship would end”, he ended his tale looking down at me curiously, trying to figure out what I thought.

“What?”, I said puzzled trying to understand what he had just told me. Aramis slowly leaned in, pressing his soft lips against mine. My eyelids fluttered closed. Shortly after we broke apart.

Leaning his forehead against mine, a little breathless, he whispered: “(Y/n), I love you.” Smiling I pulled him towards me, taking his amazing hat in my hands. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him into another kiss, running my fingers through those gorgeous locks.