*throws John Price At You*
*throws john price at you*
please.....c-can I get more crumbs of Simon pining over a fat!darling please đ„č
i have been rereading crush and it is making me insane on how fond he is of the soft beauty. the body descriptions and the teetering and mish-mash of lust and fluff is making me cry *insert stickman figures*
characters pining over fat beauties is always gourmet I swear đđđ
you're always at the laundromat the first and third thursday of the month, simon's noticed.
he hates that he's noticed, actually, because its testament to the fact that he can't stop looking at, watching, or observing you. it makes him embarrassed, how often he thinks about you. sometimes while on long flights he daydreams about all the times he's watched you bend over to load your clothes into the dryer, your already fat ass getting rounder and wider as you shovel wet towels into a rickety old machine. he's had dreams where he bites at your soft hips and digs his fingers into the rolls in your side, pinning your wide, soft body underneath him. he wants those thick thighs clamped around him and shaking with pleasure that's he's given you. he'd be so good to you if you gave him a chance, he drives himself crazy at night thinking of all the ways he wants to accomplish that.
it would be one thing if it was solely a physical attraction, but no, it can't ever be that simple. you had to go and be kind, didn't you? it almost feels like a personal attack, how unrelentingly nice you are to him. by all rights, you should be doing what everyone else does- either avoiding him or actively ignoring him. he's a big man wearing a balaclava in the middle of summer. you should be nervous around him. you most definitely aren't. you treat him the same way he's seen you treat any stranger- with a respectful distance and a friendly smile. the first time you spoke to him was to offer him a spare quarter when he'd accidentally come up short on change. he's replayed that interaction in his head hundreds of times by now, cursing at himself for just staring for a moment before silently accepting. he should have said something to you, he tells himself as he recalls your small smile as you went back to your book while you waited for your dryer to finish.
the next time he saw you, he made sure to pay back the quarters he'd borrowed. he couldn't stand the thought that you might perceive him as a mooch or something, someone who doesn't repay their debts. you were so sweet, insisting that it's no big deal, that these things happen, and you were just happy to help so he didn't have to deal with sopping wet jeans. he carefully, gently grabbed your wrist and pressed the coins into your palm, closing your fingers around it using his own. it was painfully intimate, as was the soft 'thank you' that you gave in reply.
laundry day is next week. he's not sure what he's going to say or do, but he's got some time to think about it. whatever happens, he can't let a soft, sweet thing like you slip through his fingers. he's spent enough time alone to know that his own thoughts make for terrible company, and that he'd much, much rather be in yours.
-
sleepymoppet liked this · 9 months ago
-
jennajackflash liked this · 10 months ago
-
vindictiveinvancouver liked this · 10 months ago
-
moony2802 liked this · 10 months ago
-
niki-chan15 liked this · 10 months ago
-
kiwi0429 liked this · 10 months ago
-
1000-leaves liked this · 10 months ago
-
horny-for-tf141 reblogged this · 11 months ago
-
thisiswhattheycallafinecareer liked this · 11 months ago
-
321clockworkangels liked this · 1 year ago
-
fortheloveofallthatsholy liked this · 1 year ago
-
random-fandom-smoothie liked this · 1 year ago
-
leonardzapit liked this · 1 year ago
-
noonanaz liked this · 1 year ago
-
azure-faye liked this · 1 year ago
-
witchrave liked this · 1 year ago
-
giyuusbabe liked this · 1 year ago
-
saritanotserena liked this · 1 year ago
-
shookkatofthat liked this · 1 year ago
-
bc17-writes liked this · 1 year ago
-
yaminax liked this · 1 year ago
-
distinguishedsaladphantom liked this · 1 year ago
-
tiger48819 liked this · 1 year ago
-
dvmbassbitch liked this · 1 year ago
-
kurvaalkolike liked this · 1 year ago
-
fleuraimer liked this · 1 year ago
-
pink-ladys-stuff liked this · 1 year ago
-
not-enough-homestuck-upinthis liked this · 1 year ago
-
fanficlover2902 liked this · 1 year ago
-
thewizardarson liked this · 1 year ago
-
zanypatrolsalad liked this · 1 year ago
-
kingcreation liked this · 1 year ago
-
inykirby liked this · 1 year ago
-
venusk2000 liked this · 1 year ago
-
dollygirl808 liked this · 1 year ago
-
underthestarwars liked this · 1 year ago
-
snxwmother liked this · 1 year ago
-
loserbobby1 liked this · 1 year ago
-
pinkchips liked this · 1 year ago
-
lanalafey liked this · 1 year ago
-
lunaisalive09 liked this · 1 year ago
-
dahlialowery liked this · 1 year ago
-
hellshire-harlot liked this · 1 year ago
-
kessi-21 liked this · 1 year ago
-
rsaliz liked this · 1 year ago
-
noicedog liked this · 1 year ago
-
depoble liked this · 1 year ago
More Posts from Bookobsessedram
I consistently forget that Nikolai is an objectively scary guy. This man is an illegal arms dealer, built like a brick house, and withstood torture from Russian Unltranationalists, not to mention he's filthy-fuckin-rich. He consults with war criminals on a regular basis and puts himself in increasingly dangerous situations throughout the series. He is so confident in his ability to outsmart and/or outrun the police that he leaves notes for them at crime scenes and he definitely have some guys on the inside of the Russian police department. He has absolutely no problem with kidnapping people and using them as leverage, not even really caring what happens to them. I'm convinced that Nikolai knows no fear.
landscape with honey
summary: price/reader bear shifter fic. PART 4. (read the whole thing on ao3 here) tags: light daddy kink, breeding kink, very nsfw, she/her pronouns for reader
-
He starts showing up at your house at odd hours.Â
Youâre fixing coffee in the morning, still fuzzy and warm from sleep, only to hear the sounds of hammering outside. Wrapping yourself in just a housecoat, you find John fixing the loose step on your stairs, barely sparing enough time to greet you before returning to the task at hand. When he finishes, he brushes off your attempts to pay him for the job, just loading his tools back in the car and driving off.
You sip your coffee and wonder. Odd.
The next day, you find him raking the leaves in your lawn. Two days later, he shows up at the grocers when youâre picking up produce, and helps you carry all your bags to the car. He also adds a peculiar amount of canned goods to your order and when you fret and try to tell him that you donât need the pickles and sauerkraut and beans and all of that stuff, he just lays a hand flat on your head and drags it down your hair until you go quiet.Â
He pays for the whole order.
Youâve never had to wonder about a manâs actions. Men are largely inscrutable to you, ever-shifting. They say one thing and mean another. They look at you like one might look at an oil painting, entitled something like Virgin Meeting Her Loverâs Eyes From The Top Of The Staircase or Landscape With Virgin. They speak to you as though an answer were entirely antithetical to their purpose in conversing with you.Â
John listens to you with a focus that borders on intimidating, like he wants to hear each word enunciated exactly how you might enunciate it. It has the sharp clarity of respect, of a mutual acknowledgement of humanity. He also comes over to fix your sink without you having to ask. The world of men is still largely confusing to you.Â
John grows surlier as the days grow shorter though. He doesnât snap or snarl at you the way he does sometimes with his recruits (you rarely see him interact with them, but sometimes youâll drop him off his lunch on the days when youâre feeling particularly generous and thatâs when youâll have the rare pleasure of hearing him shout at a trembling twenty-three year old for littering on the trail like a military captain), but itâs a near thing.Â
The worst is when he catches you on a jog one morning on his drive to work. You see his truck with the faded red paint pass you by and you give a short wave that he returns. He passes you by about half a yard before coming to a full stop and reversing. You stare at him as the window rolls down, brows furrowed.
âHi Joââ you start.
âGet in the car,â John growls. You hear the doors unlock.Â
ââŠMy uhâŠmy shiftâs in two hours, John, I canât justââ
âGet in the car.â
âThis is my only time to exercise!â
âIf I have to get out of this car and drag you inside, honey, I will. Donât play with me. Get in.â
You get in the car. Probably wisely. Still dripping sweat and shivering from the coldâyouâre not used to jogging in the winter, or at all for that matter, but it seemed like as good a time as any to startâyou glance over to stare at the side of Johnâs face. His jaw is set, almost as if in anger. His knuckles are white over the steering wheel as he makes a U-turn and drives back into town. The cab of his truck smells like flannel pulled out from the back of a closet, almost musty, but comforting in the way that old clothes can sometimes smell. Thereâs a cigarette ashed out in the dish in front of the centre console.Â
He takes you to the nearest bakery for coffee and a breakfast muffin and stares you down until you eat the whole thing. You feel like you have to scarf it down. Customers bustle into the bakery to order coffee to-go and fresh cookies and scones in waxy paper bags; everyone in town knows each other so you try to avoid the more curious stares when theyâre turned on you.
âThis is weird,â you say, staring down at the crumbs on your plate. âThis is really weird.â
âThis is what you get for exercising before winter,â John says, flagging down the barista for another muffin and a refill on your coffee. âWaste of calories.â The last part is said derisively, almost with a scoff.Â
You frown. âLots of people exercise. Even when it snows.â
âWinter is a time for hibernating. NotâŠsweat,â he says with a grimace, like the very thought is anathema to him.Â
"Hibernating?" you repeat skeptically, scrunching up your nose. "I mean, I spend a lot of time indoors, but I wouldn't say I'm hibernating."
John stares at you until you look away, flushed. "Finish your breakfast."
The barista returns with another blueberry muffin and a fresh cup of coffee. At least John's the one paying. When he finally seems satisfied, he hustles you home and leaves you off at the door with a stern warning.Â
âYou gonna be good for me this time?â he asks, a finger curled under your chin, tilting your head up. One of his hands curls around the doorframe and your heart jumps when you hear the wood creak under his grip. This close, you can see the faintest silver streaks at his temples and the flecks of it in his beard.
âIt was just a light jog,â you mumble, looking away.Â
âNot a light anything,â he warns, ducking closer until you feel like shrinking back, like disappearing into your house. âBake a cake if you have to burn off energy so bad. Iâll be over around seven, alright?âÂ
You mumble something, the words getting lost in themselves. Itâs impossible to think with John in your space like this. Itâs only when he finally pulls away and ambles back to his truck that you rock back on your heels, let go of whatever spell he had you under.Â
The first week of December hits town like a truck.Â
Youâre trudging home alone after your shift when you make the decision to cut through the forest because you missed the last bus and you donât want to spend an hour walking home. The first snow of the season has caught you off guard, clad in boots too autumnal and a sweater too thin for the biting cold. The flakes fall in thick chunks that stick for a brief moment before melting into the skin.
Itâs not the first time youâve travelled through the forest alone. The town is surrounded by pockets of the forest, like it canât help enveloping whatever space is left for it. Oftentimes itâs easier just to cut through the woods rather than travel the long way around. You wouldnât even call this the forest proper, not like the acres of trees sprouting over the mountains just off in the distance.Â
A bush rustles. Your eyes flick over for a second, breath hovering in your chest before you decide that itâs just a squirrel. Nothing ever happens in a town like this. The man from the other day notwithstanding, nothing truly bad ever happens. You keep walking down the partially demarcated path, lit only by the full moon overhead. Itâs so dark that the snow around you is almost blue.Â
The bush rustles again. You stop this time, feet staying planted in the snow long enough for your feet to grow cold. You stare at the dark shoots covered in a layer of snow; it stripes the branches like candy from a time ago, licorice twisted with white bark, and it doesnât move when you look at it. The bushes and trees are dense, impossible to peer through. Even walking through the forest doesnât make you feel immersed in it. You follow a barely marked path, hard to see through the recent snowfall, and stare out into the dark woods with a kind of animal sense. Not sure whether youâre alone, whether somethingâs there with you, and whether itâs sensed you or if youâve sensed it first.Â
You start walking again when your feet go numb. Better to just get home.
It comes behind you again as a slightly louder rustle. Itâs harder to shake off the fear this time, harder to say that itâs just the wind. The snow crunches under more than one set of feet, branches cracking under the weight of something larger than you.Â
You donât want to turn around, but the sound of something chuffing makes your stomach drop. The first thing that emerges when you turn to face it is its massive head, a white frosted muzzle, and the visible hump on its back. The wispy smoke of its breath puffs out when it breathes. Its eyes are dark, hardly reflecting any light at all. Then the rest of it emerges, the saplings bending out of its way as it clambers out of the woods and onto the path, staring you down all the while.
Youâve never seen a bear before. Not this close. Not so close that you know itâs been stalking you, know that it didnât come upon you by accident. Youâre staring down at your own body from somewhere else, fear displacing you. Rending you from your own body. Thereâs no way to guess its weight at a glance, but itâs easily twice the size of you, easily more than that.Â
When it takes a step forward, everything goes dark.Â

You wake up snuggled under the warmth of a thick blanket. Sleep is creamy thick, engulfing you on all sides, only the faintest prickle of awareness letting you know that youâre awake.Â
Itâs unpleasant to leave the cotton miasma of sleep, you think. Your nose scrunches up and you let out a tired huff, trying to will yourself back into it. The harder you try to force yourself back into it though, the farther away it floats.
Still it weighs you down. It takes an age to work up the energy to so much as twitch a finger. Even your eyelids insist on staying shut. Yet, the prickle of consciousness needles at you as if to say hello, wake up, you need to get up. You sigh and try to shimmy up onto your elbows.
A hand shoves you back down. The breath rushes out of you.
âGetâŠback down,â a rough voice grunts from over you and then the full weight of a man settles on top of you, pressing you deep into the mattress.Â
Consciousness snaps back into you, elastic sharp. The weight of him pins you to the bed, makes you sink into the plushness ofâand this is gradually coalescing in your mindâan unfamiliar place. All four corners of your body are trapped under him. The voice is familiar though. Ragged, brutal. A saw taken to the trunk of an old, thick tree, too many interior rings to count. You whisper Johnâs name and he grunts, making you flinch from how the sound reverberates through the side of your head.
Exhaustion is thick though and it leaves you heavy, even when John slowly lifts himself to his elbows from behind you. You feel him drag his body down the length of the bed, beard scratching into your skin with every petal soft kiss dropped along your spine during his descent.
âJohn?â you whisper, only just able to turn your head, not even able to struggle up to your elbows. âJ-John?â
He doesnât answer you. The room is near pitch black, only a window on the other end of the room with the curtain pulled back the smallest amount enough to let the moonlight in. Even the moonlight isnât enough. You know from the shape of the window that this isnât your house, that it must be somewhere else. You can only surmise from Johnâs presence that itâs his, but that thought passes over you like a rock skipping over water.Â
âWherâmâI?â you murmur, eyes fluttering shut when his lips press over the small of your back. Sensitive there.Â
Rough hands with callused fingertips smooth over your ass, pressing into the flesh. His fingers pry your cheeks apart, thumbs dipping into the space between and pressing over your hole, making you burn all over. Youâre too far gone to worry about any hair on your legs or anything about your body other than Johnâs hands undulating over your ass and thighs. You flinch violently when his teeth sink into the meat on the underside of your ass, so tender that even exhausted to the bone your body lashes out.Â
Big hands pry your legs apart. You flinch at the sudden hot breath over your sex, a whine tickling your throat. His face hovers so close to your centre that the tip of his nose presses on the tender skin near your entrance.Â
âWhaâ dâyouâŠthink youâre doinâ...â you ask breathlessly. Your brain tries to order your leg to kick, but it stays flat and limp on the bed.Â
The first touch of Johnâs tongue along your slit makes you melt, the flat of his tongue lapping upward and making your hips tilt up with it. It almost makes your mind go blank again, almost tips you back into the unconscious world because the synapses in your brain stop firing the second you remember that itâs John between your legs licking hungrily at your cunt. John from the grocery store, John from the rangerâs station in the mountainsâthe John youâve been crushing on and coveting for months now, content to just be friends with the gruff, handsome man in the house next to yours. Now sucking one of your nether lips into his mouth and tracing his tongue up the inside, gliding it over the supple flesh.
âYer in the den,â John mumbles into your pussy and itâs like he sears the words into your brain. ââN Iâm takinâ care of you, honey.â
âTheâŠthe denâŠ?â Itâs so hard to keep your thoughts in order. Each flick of his tongue makes you gasp, pussy growing wetter and hips grinding languidly down on his face.
He hums instead of answering.Â
âWhyâmâI so tired?â you slur.Â
His tongue saws over your clit from behind. It tears a broken whimper from you. You feel every textured ridge, the way it flicks around in a circle and then up and down again.Â
âWinter season,â John says, sucking your clit into his mouth until you whine at the top of your lungs. âBearâs sleep in winter.â
âThaâs silly. Mânot a bear,â you moan.Â
âNo,â he agrees, humming into your sex. âJusâ mated to one. Makes you sleepy too, honey.â
âMated?â you repeat back, but itâs lost in the way you moan when he eats your pussy from the back, licking into you with renewed vigour. Hungry like a bear. Grunting like a satisfied man, slurping loud enough to make your face heat up.Â
Words and old memories about bears hardly matter when the handsome man from next door spreads your legs wide, almost to the point of pain, and sinks his tongue into your hole again. You never wouldâve expected John to be vocal, but heâs noisy behind you, groaning into your cunt. He keeps mumbling things under his breath that you canât catch.Â
âJohnââ you gasp, biting your lip when he sucks your clit into his mouth again. âJohnâJohnââ
He only has to give you a single finger to tip you over the edge, feeds it in nice and slow. Your cunt clenches down at the intrusion, teeth nearly breaking through the skin of your lip.Â
When he crawls back over you, anticipation makes you shudder. You hear something faint in the background that grows steadily louder as John rests his elbows on either side of your head, until you realize that itâs your own voice murmuring, âPut it in, put it in, put it inââ
He obliges. A thick, steady plunge that hardly manages more than a handful of inches before youâre crying, and itâs too much, too much, too much. Pleasure not a limpid pool anymore but something cavernous and deep-dwelling, pulling you in or trying to make a home inside of you for it. Johnâs biceps tense with the strain of holding himself back.Â
You balance on the knifeâs edge between pleasure and pain. Thereâs a single thought in your head that it might burn you up from the inside; it runs a jagged hole through you.Â
His nose drags through your hair. âNever expected you. Thought Iâd go another season alone âtill I started smellinâ you around town.â
You hiccup. âYâneverânever paid me any attention âforâ before, ahââ
ââCourse I paid attention toâya, honey,â John says into your ear, grunting when he drives deeper into your pussy, still just a languid grind of his hips, so mind-numbingly slow that your thoughts sizzle out of your head. He keeps dragging his hips back and plunging in, barely pulling away from you, all skin on slick skin. âMade a home for mâself in your house. Made sure we had ânough to eat for the winter.â
âThe winter?â
âWonât be goinâ anywhere for a few months.â He brushes your hair out of the way to kiss down your neck, giving in to the urge to bite just a little. His body stays pressed tight to yours, hardly an inch of space between the two of you. âWasnâ sure at first if itâd be here or in your house soâŠÂ fuck, I had to get ready. Make sure youâd be safe when it hit.â
âDonâ evenâŠknow whaâ that means,â you mumble into the mattress, then squeal and fist the fists when John shoves a hand under you to grope your chest.
âDonât worry about it,â he shushes you. âAll yâhave to do now is lie there ân take my cock, okay, honey? Canâya do that for me? Iâll get some food in you after weâre done, then send ya back to bed.â
Only a whine comes out when you open your mouth. Johnâs arm by your head forces you to breathe in the scent of him, musky and rich. You stare at the hair on his knuckles and his thick fingers gripping the sheets as well, old nicks and scars decorating his hand. You canât stop staring at his fingers and thinking that he had one of those in you before, that heâs felt you from the inside.Â
He never pulls away, never changes positions, just fucks you on your tummy in his bed. Youâve never been in Johnâs bedroom before, but this has to be his roomâeven the pillowcase smells like him, pine needles and cigar smoke. He keeps up a steady pounding into your cunt, rutting like a wild animal. Has to be close. Gets so close to you that you feel smothered, trapped in place. Like if you struggled, he wouldnât let up. You want to test it, see if you could, but the heaviness is still in your limbs, keeping you docile. Convenient. A little convenient thing for him to use, like a doll to get himself off with.
âNever coulda imagined such a pretty girl fâr me,â John groans, getting a grip in your hair to twist your head, tugging you into a kiss. Your whole body sparks to life, so shocked that you canât even kiss him back at first. You wait until he pulls back, staring into his half-lidded eyes through the mess of your hair all tangled up around you. âGave up on thinkinâ there was anyone out there. Thank fuck I found you first, honey. Can start workinâ on all the good stuff now. Get you to give daddy a baby.â
âD-daddy?â you gasp back, almost scandalized.Â
He pants into your shoulder, worked up now. âYeah, honey. Donâ I take care of you? Buy yâr food, fix yâr house? Give you someplace nice ân warm to sleep?â
You feel soaked with sweat, twitchy, on the verge of something dangerous. Vision all fogged up, heart beating so fast that your skin buzzes. Stretched out on a fat cock and pinned in a manâs bed, nowhere to run or hide.Â
âY-yeah,â you stutter when John gets a bit rougher, his breathing getting more staggered, laboured.Â
âThatâs right, girl,â he grunts, âIâm yâr fuckinâ daddy then, arenât I?â
Magma bubbles up from deep inside of you. Rockslides off in the distance beat against the ground. When you cry out, it gets lost in the rubble.Â
You stumble into the living room maybe hours later after using the washroom across the hall. Maybe a day later. Itâs hard to say how many times the sun has risen and fallen behind the mountains. The clock face stares back at you uncomprehendingly.Â
Come drips out of you onto the floor. Thick droplets run down your inner thighs. John is still sleeping in the bed where you left him, snoring like a chainsaw. It mustâve been what woke you up. Thereâs no way of knowing how long itâs been since he first brought you home, since he left a mess in your pussy, which is still puffy and sore from rough use. You walk with halting little steps to try to minimize the ache.Â
You stare bleary-eyed around the room. It feels somehow different than the previous times Johnâs had you over; there are more throws and blankets draped over the couch, candles scattered around the living room with a lighter on the mantle.Â
Thereâs a fire roaring in the fireplace, blanketing the house in a layer of warmth. It makes you sluggish, stumbling forward only a handful of steps before the shaggy rug in front of the fire drags you back down to the floor.Â
âWhatâre you doing out of bed, pretty girl?â someone rumbles from behind you.Â
âHad tâpee,â you say, blinking. You try to rub the sleep out of your eyes unsuccessfully. âWhyâmâI still so tired? Itâs beenâŠI slept so longâŠâ
âCâmon, honey,â John says, coming up behind you and curling his arms around you, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head. âTold you it was gonna be a long winter. Maybe just one more and then somethinâ to eat, okay?â
Itâs easy to sink to the floor, so easy. Especially with the fluffy rug under your feet. Especially with the fireplace toasting you from the outside in, the tinder crackling in the hearth. Everything in the house is dark and warm, only the fire giving you any light at all. Outside the window, the moon is still heavy in the sky.Â
Something about the humidity of the den makes you suddenly so tired, boneless, pliable when he goes to move you, when John curves himself around you in the furs and reaches down to slide a hand between your thighs.Â
He grunts when he finds you wet and wanting, sinking a couple fingers in and palming your clit. He doesnât talk much still, but he says good girl when he cants your hips and slowly stretches you out on his cock. Feeds it into you achingly slow, like molasses. Like nothingâs due for another few months, so why rush it? Heâll take his time so youâre nice and happy and sweet come spring for cubs.
Youâre not sure what that means. The pace is slow and deep, like before but less intentional. Like he just wants to savour the warmth of your body.Â
When he finally comes deep inside you, your body goes limp, collapsing in a heap onto the rug. You expect John to pull out and turn over, maybe pull you onto his chest so you have somewhere to rest. Instead, he sighs all tired and content, and stays in you, still plugged up in your cunt, his spend only just starting to leak out into a pool beneath you.Â
âAre we gonna eat?â you mumble, already half-asleep.
Somewhere behind you, he laughs; itâs soft like a snowfall in winter. âYeah, honey. After a nap, we can eat.â
I CANNOT WAIT IM ACTUALLY SHAKING IN MY BOOTS
I just want to say: to whoever the anon who sent in the soft dom Nikolai request was, I have been thinking about that ask for HOURS and I cannot stop thinking about it and Iâm literally planning out a whole thing for it rn
Inevitable (Ending 1 to Situationship)
Pairings: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x AFAB! Reader
TW: Major Character Death, blood, hurt/ little comfort, a g o n y

Simon closes his eyes in defeat. He had been dancing with death for too long, and it'd finally come to collect it's dues.
This particular mission had been long. He knew it would be. Price had debriefed him on it months beforeâ since it would only be them two. They were the seniors of the task force. They've done a similar mission before, so it seemed only natural that they did it again.
But it didn't mean it hadn't been shit since they arrived.
Almost 9 months out in the freezing cold, MRE's every day, waiting for the chance to finally get their hands on vital information that would save millions.
It was a tiny town in Russia, Oymyakon. Home to about 500 people. Soldiers, mostly. The plan had been to wait for a large portion of the small militia to move citiesâ to another safe house in the nearby city of Khara-Tumul. What prolonged this mission was that while Ghost and Price knew they'd move, they didn't know when. And it had been imperative that the duo get out here not to miss this slim window.
To Simon, this had been a perfect way to not be distracted with the situation back home. With you.
You had been with him for years now, and he always loved going home to you. A warm flat, a home-cooked meal, and the love in your eyes every time he came back from a mission. But then something he hoped wouldn't happen, did. Simon's past chose to catch up with him now. Now, when he finally had something to look forward to in life.
One day, outside his door, was an envelope. He had felt a crushing pressure on his chest. The blood in his veins was cold, and his hands trembled as he picked up the envelope. He squeezed his eyes as he let out a shuddering breathâ praying to whatever higher power that the enemies he has made throughout the years don't know about you. He practically rips open the package and his worst fear is confirmed. Photos of you and Simon out on a date. He even remembers the said date because you had been wearing the sexiest leather booties he'd ever seen. Simon had made you wear them as he fucked you into the mattress that night.
Which meant that Simon had to end it with you. He was about to go on a mission for an unprecedented amount of time and he would not be here to protect you. So a month before leaving, he treated you coldly. Harshly. A way he'd never dream of being with you. He would hear you crying in the bedroom and it was a knife to his heart, but to him, it seemed like it was the only way to keep you safe.
Then, a moment he'll never forget. He said that he didn't feel the same for you as he did before. Thought it best if you both went your separate ways and that it had to be within the next two weeks because he was selling the flat and moving away. That whatever of his you had, to give it to him. Any sleeping shirts, photos, and the bloody ring he promised himself you'd wear to your grave.
He was a witness to how you broke at his words. God. He, at that moment. wished his enemies just took him and be done with it. Relieve him of the agony he caused to himself by hurting you. You wailed, agonizingly loud, fat tears rolling down your cheeks and dripping from your chin to the floor for what seemed like hours.
Til your heartbreak turned to rage. You spit venom at him. That if he had another 'cunt' waiting for him somewhere. That if he ever even loved you. You always were his strong merciless woman with fire in your veins and smoke in your lungs. How hard it was to be him, sitting on the couch and blankly stare at the telly without rising to your jibes. To tell you the truth. That there has been no one before you and there won't be one after you. But he forced himself to ignore you as you shoved all of your belongings in your luggage before throwing him the engagement ring and slamming the door.
Gone.
After this, he lived up to his namesake. He was a ghost from your past life. As if he had never been there in the first place. You moved away, far away, and it was bittersweet for Simon because this way you could disappear, out of the limelight. Breathing. Alive.
And he kept an eye on you, from afar. Just to make sure you were safe.
It worked. Both fortunately and unfortunately. You moved on, it seemed. Not from him, which he is so grateful for, but your life went on in every other aspect. It went uninterrupted up until his deployment.
It was supposed to be a simple but long mission. Wait for them to clear out before cleaning house. But even with all the careful planning, and no fucking mistakes, it went tits up.
Somehow they missed one. One fucking enemy. Simon had been standing behind John and turned around after hearing the crunch of broken glass behind him.
One shot to Simon's shoulder, another to his stomach, and then another to the right side of his chest. Before Simon falls, John shoots the last man dead. He throws himself to his knees next to Simon, gloved hands on top of each other as he presses hard into the bullet hole bleeding the mostâ the one in his ribcage.
"Christ, Ghost. Stay with me, son. We'll get you out of here and patched up in no time, yeah?"
Simon can't hear anything past the rushing of blood in his ears and his own heartbeat, pumping out blood from his wounds with each pulse. Simon's losing too much blood, too fast, and he knows it.
Price is panicking, voice warbling on the radio calling for medevac, but the wait time is 45 minutes. Far too long. And Simon had beat the devil once, long ago. Everyone knows he can't be beaten twice. He opens his mouth and blood bubbles in it as he tries to speak.
"I'm not making it, Captain."
"The hell you're not, Simon, stay with me!"
Simon grabs John's wrist with the little strength he's got left and whispers out, "Captain. John. Please," before digging into the inside of his glove, and pulling out something before clasping it in John's hands and squeezing.
"Please."
John looks at his own hand and nods, eyes glassy with years before he sniffles, clears his throat, and tells Simon of how his daughter had just learned how to argue back when he wouldn't give her any more juice because she's had too much.
Simon is still gripping John's hand as he drops his head back in resignation âbefore he imagines the family he could've had with you. Pretty little girl with curly hair, your eyes, and all of your attitude. In another life, he thinks, he'd find you there too. In any life, he'd love you.
He wheezes an inhale onceâwet, painfulâ and exhales, and then his chest stills. Hand gripping John's goes limp. John lets out an agonizing scream through his teeth before he presses the button on his radio so hard it cracks.
"All stationsâ this is Bravo. We got the intel...One KIA."
---
You're in your bed, toasty and warm, when there's a knock on your door. You sharply raise your head before turning to look at the clock.
8 a.m.
'Who in the hell is at my door at this hour?'
You begrudgingly throw the covers to the side, hand on the swell of your belly before rolling up from your side to sit on the edge of the bed, and step into your slippers. One hand underneath your 3rd trimester bump, you drag your feet towards the front door and open it.
A tall man with mutton chops and a black beanie is standing in front of you. Your face is contorting into confusion when he opens his mouth to say, "You must be Simon's fiancee."
Your heart starts to pound into your ribcage. You have an inkling of what this is about. 'Please god, no.'
"It is with deep regret that I am here to inform you of the untimely death of your fiance, Lieutenant Simon 'Ghost' Riley. He died on active duty, contributing his best to our cause. The reputation gained by your fiance is a fine one, and I hope the knowledge of this affords you pride and comfort during your sorrow. I extend my heartfelt sympathy to you."
Your throat is closing up, choking you as tears well in your eyes. Chest is on fire because you can't breathe and your chin is trembling with the struggle to not weep and fall on your knees. Taking a deep shuddering breath, you clench your teeth. You're livid. Whatever the fuck this is, it isn't good enough for your Simon.
Voice warbly and wet, you hiss, "I could've gotten a casualty letter from the bloody military if I wanted to hear you spew your shit," ending it with a sniffle.
"You're right. May I come in?"
Throwing the door open, you shuffle inside as John steps inside. You're about to sit down when you hear a "Let me.", before the chair you're about to sit on is pulled back. Holding the underside of your belly, you let out a huff as you drop your weight to the seat.
You turn to look at John and you see the clench in his jaw before he opens his mouth to try and speak but he cuts himself off with a clearing of his throat. He takes a second before swallowing and grips the back of one of your dinner table chairs before attempting to speak again.
"Simon was one of my best." Your eyes soften at how frail and shaky his voice sounds.
"He was always at my six. Said it was to be the eyes I didn't have at the back of my head. But I know he always had his facing an open area whenever I was turned around. He died for me. Had he been standing anywhere else other than behind me, he would still be here," and he breaks down, shaky sobs leaving him.
You slowly get up, hand to your lower back before moving to him and giving him an embrace as you wail into his shirtâ mourning the loss of a loved one.
It seems like a long time before John taps your upper back and says, "Come. This cannot be good for the baby. You need some relaxing tea, eh?"
With hiccupping breaths, you pull away to look at him before nodding.
"Come. You're gonna make it for me. I wish to get to know what kind of extraordinary man you must be. Simon would not have given his life for less."
He gives a self-deprecating chuckle before he digs into his pockets, before holding his fist out, dog tags glinting under the light and a small white square between his thumb and index. That square has your address written in shorthand and it had a bloody streak over a part of itâ the streak the shape of a finger, as if ripped out from someone's hand.
"His dog tags. As well as what Simon on his dying breath. He carried this with him, and by the state of how crumpled it is, he had it everywhere with him."
You take the chain, putting it around your neckâ tags resting against your bellyâ before taking the paper. It's a photo of you. You're in a flower sundress, skin glowing under the rays of the sun with a blinding smile and rosy cheeks. You knew this photo. Simon always claimed it was his favorite. That he loved your smile here because He had made you smile like that.
Your tears are slipping from your eyes and dripping onto your pajamas before picking up the dog tags and pressing a kiss onto the cold metal, then letting them drop. Little baby Riley gives a swift kick to where the tags landed on your stomach.