Im Feeling Grateful For All Of You. Ive Grown So Much As A Writer In The Last Few Years On This Website.

i’m feeling grateful for all of you. i’ve grown so much as a writer in the last few years on this website. interacting with y’all gave me the confidence to begin writing my very own fantasy novel in december 2022 as a love letter to my queer self and my friends who never felt properly represented in books and medias. rping on here gave me a safe space to tell the stories i wish i had seen or read about growing up. and it’s been quite healing. and i’m grateful to every single one of you who followed me on this journey. love y’all <333

couronnez​:

❝ Maybe we should have. ❞

He laughs, a sound that slips so very easily over his lips. It hasn’t, in a long time, he missed it. Just .. living. Being himself and unapologetically so. The food is long forgotten, a minuscule thing on an evening like this, with her sitting vis-à-vis from him. Her presence was mesmerizing. Otherworldly capturing. A moment spent in quiet, with him just taking in her sight, the beauty of her face and then -

❝I have yet to find something I truly like. But … ❞

He leans forward, conspiratorially, his smile widening so easily, it was clear he was no stranger to doing so. Mischief gleams in his eyes. A desire. He wants her to like him. To meet the TRUE Vasily Lanstov. Not the CEO of Lantsov Corporation.

❝ Perhaps, you could show me? ❞

She might, she might not. It doesn’t matter. He is not keen on finding out whether he likes salad or not - as long as it is made by her he will eat it. That’s the whole deal. Flirting and flirting shamelessly but hiding it away with an expertise previously unknown to him.

Then the conversation turns serious again. It’s about her past. Her modeling career. Vasily understands the struggles, the pain. He knows what she must have been through, starving herself to stay thin. To stay photogenic. What nonsense. Vasily thinks he has never seen a prettier woman in his life before.

❝ You shouldn’t. Absolutely not. You’re perfect … ❞

HE DID NOT. He didn’t just say that, did he? Those few words. Vasily holds her glance despite it all. Feverishly. His blue orbs filled with desire. Need. Longing.

❝ Your- … your looks I mean. Impeccable.❞

He smiles, hides it insecurity behind a layer of charm. Suddenly he wishes for nothing more but his wine. To calm his nerves. His heart is racing behind his sternum, his chest aching with the stress of it all but he doesn’t care. Cannot care. Not when he is so mesmerized by the woman sitting across from him.

❝ Anyway … may I ask … what those pills are for? ❞

That laugh. It had startled her. In the right way. It was beautiful, genuine. Nothing she’d had expected from the all famous Vasily Lantsov who’d gotten so drunk years ago he’d spilled his drink on her sister Makhi who was his date at the time. I have yet to find something I truly like, he’d said. She’d thought it was sad at first, sad that he hadn’t yet found something he truly enjoyed. But then he had leaned forward as if to share a secret with her. Perhaps, you could show me? he had said. And she had known he wasn’t just talking about salads. She’d looked down, shyly, as a smile spread across her pink lips. ❛ Perhaps i will. ❜ She had uttered, fiddling with the corner of her napkin before she’d talked about her past. 

Toffee eyes were locked with blue ones. You’re perfect. Those are dangerous words. She slightly shifted on her seat, a nervous laugh escaping her. She didn’t know what to say or how to reply to this. Honestly, she didn’t think she was perfect. And didn’t aspire to be either. Not anymore. She knew he meant it well but something still stirred inside of her. It’s a compliment, the little voice whispered. Just take it and move on. ❛ Thanks. Many say the same about you, Mister Elected Most Eligible Bachelor of Russia. ❜ She ends up saying, hoping the smile and the teasing would dissipate her discomfort. He didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. Get over it!  But she can’t. Lips part again and she’s about to open up about the situation but he suddenly wonders about the pills. ❛ Oh. ❜ She says, picking up the little pill box. She’s relieved. This is something she can talk about without tiptoeing. ❛ Those are Plavix. Well, blood thinners. I take them to prevent heart diseases. I’ve had issues with my heart in the past and had surgery to fix it. ❜ She explains. She is totally open about it. No shame, no discomfort. She’s at ease. ❛ I’m okay now though. Well, i still need to be careful but with the medication i can pretty much live my life as fully as before. ❜ She smiles. A reassuring one. She wants to reassure him. Let him know that she’s alright now and won’t die on him or anything, since she knows a lot of people get scared off whenever she speaks up about it.

It's me, hi ! I'm the problem it's me ! At tea time, everybody agrees. I'll stare directly at the sun but never in the mirror, it must be so exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero.

independent, highly selective and oc & crossover friendly CARDAN GREENBRIAR of Holly Black's The Cruel Prince. canon portrayal with some headcanon divergences. glamoured by chrissie.

MODERN AU SHENANIGANS

Nikolai got pretty wasted with Rasmus ( @iskron​ ) last night and apparently he drunk texted his ex Aleksander  

𝐂 𝐑 𝐎 𝐖 𝐋 𝐄 𝐘 ( an angel that did not so much ꜰ ᴀ ʟ ʟ as

𝐬𝐚𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐯𝐚𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐬 )

heeded by salem

Yes, Mayu whispers inwardly. Yes, it would. They can’t afford distraction while someone’s life literally depends on her. But he doesn’t know that and probably never will. Because they won’t open up. Opening up means being vulnerable, it means letting people see you, really see you, and she doesn’t want to be seen. She chooses to be someone else’s shadow, be the reason they are still breathing because that’s the only way she manages to get through it all. Work, obligations, duty. Anything to keep their mind busy. Take that away and she collapses.

i’d let you break my heart if it meant one kiss.

They almost huff at that but do not withdraw despite the fact Benjamin is clearly getting closer. ❛ I’ve broken plenty of hearts without permission. ❜ She replies, as a matter of fact. It is true after all. They never meant to hurt anyone though. Unrequited feelings happen. That’s life. And she doesn’t get why people go for them. She’s not soft nor sweet. Hell! They’re everything but.

“  would it really be so bad to give it a shot?  ”    benjamin licks his lips,   shuffling a little closer.   eyes of brown locked on the other,   breath hitching in his throat.   he can’t exactly explain the science behind his thought process right now,   perhaps he didn’t even have one.   all he knew is he wanted to kiss them.    “  i’d let you break my heart if it meant one kiss.  ”

muse:    benjamin ‘benny’ harte.   student, part time worker, and artist on the struggle.   pure baby energy. based on:    benny wanna kith your muse.   he down BAD.   a SIMP