calxwalx - Calx
calxwalx
Calx

Very silly individual :3

66 posts

Calxwalx - Calx - Tumblr Blog

calxwalx
6 months ago

Not the β€œideal flavor” 😭😭😭😭

HAPPY 117 EVERYONE ITS BUNGOVER
HAPPY 117 EVERYONE ITS BUNGOVER
HAPPY 117 EVERYONE ITS BUNGOVER
HAPPY 117 EVERYONE ITS BUNGOVER

HAPPY 117 EVERYONE ITS BUNGOVER ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

calxwalx
6 months ago

YES.

OK correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel like the main 'yin/yang' parallel with Atsushi and Akutagawa is not something like 'this one is bad but secretly has a good side and this one is good but secretly has a bad side'.

I feel like it's more about 'who they are at their core vs who they choose to be'.

At his core Akutagawa is kind and at his core Atsushi is not. But despite this Atsushi tries every day to make the kinder choices and I love him so much for it. He has to work so hard to be good.

He wants to be a bitch SO bad I know he does but he tries his best to help people and be nice (sometimes he fails but that's OK <3)

Atsushi doesn't always WANT to help people, a lot of the time he's selfish and scared, but he does help people anyway. He keeps helping people over and over again. There's still some selfish motivation to it, and his initial motivation for helping people was because the headmaster told him that's all he was worth, but overall he does care about the people he helps and it weighs on him if he fails to save them. And of course, as the series goes on he starts helping people more because he can rather than because he feels like he needs to.

In Akutagawa's case, he's still capable of being kind but his environment led him into being someone who chooses to hurt people. But he's always been a protector at heart. In the start he was bad compared to Atsushi because he was choosing to hurt people and keep the cycle of abuse going. Just like how Atsushi developed in why he saved people, Akutagawa starts to get redeemed when he chooses to not just act on his rage. Not only does he start to spare people, but he speaks more kindly to them (apologising to Higuchi and telling Kyouka he's proud of her). It all culminates into the moment he chooses to help Atsushi and sacrifice himself for him, going back to his core value of being a protector. Even when he's finally revived, he keeps this role in his new position as Aya's Knight.

I kind of see the streaks of white in Akutagawa and the streaks of black in Atsushi not as their 'hidden sides' but as their fundamental selfs. That's who they are at their core, and their main colours (black for Akutagawa and white for Atsushi) are how they're presented to everyone else and how they try to have people see them as.

calxwalx
6 months ago

i want to talk about the moment that both made me fall in love with atsushi nakajima as a character, and which made me realize that I was probably going to get obsessed with BSD.

specifically, it was this moment.

I Want To Talk About The Moment That Both Made Me Fall In Love With Atsushi Nakajima As A Character,

words can not describe how important this moment was to me, and how vital this is to both atsushi as a character and his relationship with dazai as a whole.

as someone who is currently living with my abusive parents, this was something that resonated with me a lot β€” oftentimes, media when attempting to portray abuse (specifically parental abuse) and victims of abuse, does 1 out of 2 things:

1. Tries to justify the abuse and protect the parents β€” having the kids be okay with the treatment they recieved.

2. Has the kids utterly despise their parents with no shred of good feelings.

And whilst, sure, both of these can happen β€” and I'm sure there are victims who actually feel like this β€” it's not the most common response.

Speaking from my own experience β€” I don't know how to feel about my parents. If they died, I wouldn't know what face to make. I hate them more than anyone else, but at the same time, I grew up with them. I hate them, but I also love them. If they died, I don't know how I'd feel about it. And we get to see Atsushi having that exact breakdown β€” the elation over the person you hate dying, versus the grief and frustration and confusion. Abuse isn't simple, and feelings aren't simply β€” your abuser dying isn't something that's clean cut, it comes with a million different conflicting confusing emotions.

I Want To Talk About The Moment That Both Made Me Fall In Love With Atsushi Nakajima As A Character,

And the fact that Atsushi is allowed to have these feelings, is allowed to hate the headmaster, is allowed to grieve without forgiveness, is so important. BSD doesn't try to justify his abuse β€” it's okay to mourn someone that hurt you even if you don't like them. Their death β€” or their intentions β€” don't make forgiveness a necessity.

I Want To Talk About The Moment That Both Made Me Fall In Love With Atsushi Nakajima As A Character,

And even moreso, the fact that he gets explicitly told that regardless of the fact that that abuse was what molded him into the person he is today and has helped him survive, and the fact that the headmaster had good intentions, it was bad and unforgivable, is extremely important.

I Want To Talk About The Moment That Both Made Me Fall In Love With Atsushi Nakajima As A Character,
I Want To Talk About The Moment That Both Made Me Fall In Love With Atsushi Nakajima As A Character,

dazai not forcing atsushi to feel a certain way about his abuser, and encouraging him to mourn without forgiveness and to actually feel, is an incredibly important moment β€” i doubt that i'm only speaking for myself here when i say that when dealing with these subject matters, these are the types of things we'd like to hear.

the fact that dazai is the character telling atsushi this isn't lost on me, either β€” considering that earlier on this chapter, he sent ryuunosuke to tell atsushi about the headmaster, and they had this interaction:

I Want To Talk About The Moment That Both Made Me Fall In Love With Atsushi Nakajima As A Character,

everything about this is so fascinating and well written β€” from atsushi having an extremely realistic breakdown over the death of his abuser, to dazai telling him that he has zero obligation for forgiveness β€” and the implications that he's aware that what he's done to ryuunosuke is wrong regardless of intentions, is fascinating.

to me, atsushi nakajima has always felt human in a way most protagonists don't β€” his trauma impacts him, he has complex messy feelings that can't be easily resolved. it's his choice what to do with his emotions, and all others can do is give advice, and let him figure out how to deal with them.

atsushi nakajima crying over the man who simultaneously raised him and made his life a living hell is accurate in a way that almost hurts.

(slightly unrelated, but i sure was accurate with this prediction from a month ago, huh!)

I Want To Talk About The Moment That Both Made Me Fall In Love With Atsushi Nakajima As A Character,
calxwalx
6 months ago

YES.

description: a comic of wolverine and deadpool are looking at one another. deadpool is smiling like a mudkip. wolverine is trying to poke deadpools mask but he pokes his finger into deadpools mouth. deadpool says "ptooey" and he's weirded out.

hugh jackmans story of poking deadpools mask thinking its thick but its just a sock so he put his finger in ryans mouth.

calxwalx
6 months ago

I REALLY SEE THE VISION AHHHHHHHHHH

Please tell me you see the vision

Please Tell Me You See The Vision
Please Tell Me You See The Vision
calxwalx
6 months ago

I AM SO EXITED FOR THE MOVIE

I Will Go With Hope.
I Will Go With Hope.
I Will Go With Hope.
I Will Go With Hope.
I Will Go With Hope.
I Will Go With Hope.
I Will Go With Hope.
I Will Go With Hope.
I Will Go With Hope.
I Will Go With Hope.

I will go with hope.

Hope will go with you.

The miracle that I achieved with you will surely guide us.

calxwalx
6 months ago

yes

Spin Your GF 'round And 'round
Spin Your GF 'round And 'round

Spin your GF 'round and 'round

calxwalx
6 months ago

Jesus Christ chuuya πŸ˜€

Poor Dazai...

Poor Dazai...

calxwalx
6 months ago

On it will update when I’m done 🫑

I'm not asking, I'm BEGGING to the artists of this fandom to draw Lucy as Chappell Roan, DON'T YOU GUYS SEE THE VISION?

I'm Not Asking, I'm BEGGING To The Artists Of This Fandom To Draw Lucy As Chappell Roan, DON'T YOU GUYS
I'm Not Asking, I'm BEGGING To The Artists Of This Fandom To Draw Lucy As Chappell Roan, DON'T YOU GUYS
I'm Not Asking, I'm BEGGING To The Artists Of This Fandom To Draw Lucy As Chappell Roan, DON'T YOU GUYS
I'm Not Asking, I'm BEGGING To The Artists Of This Fandom To Draw Lucy As Chappell Roan, DON'T YOU GUYS
calxwalx
6 months ago

Thank you ☺️

I wish to any Kunikida enjoyer a pleasant evening

I Wish To Any Kunikida Enjoyer A Pleasant Evening
calxwalx
6 months ago

he is so silly to me as long as you ignore the war crimes ! just look at that face <3

He Is So Silly To Me As Long As You Ignore The War Crimes ! Just Look At That Face
calxwalx
6 months ago

BALLING MY EYES OUT

Maybe You Dislike Them Because They're Everything You Can Not Be.
Maybe You Dislike Them Because They're Everything You Can Not Be.
Maybe You Dislike Them Because They're Everything You Can Not Be.
Maybe You Dislike Them Because They're Everything You Can Not Be.
Maybe You Dislike Them Because They're Everything You Can Not Be.

Maybe you dislike them because they're everything you can not be.

Loyal, devoted, effortlessly loving and happy, trusting...

Maybe you dislike them because loyalty took Odasaku from you.

Loyalty killed him. Be it to the mafia, to the children, to his personal values. The way he still clung to some sense of morality that you, yourself, tossed away. Or rather, never had to begin with.

You always were pretending anyway.

-NixπŸŒ™

calxwalx
6 months ago

Yup. He is very dead.

Glad Fyodor's Finally Dead, Everyone's Alive And We Can Go Back To Solving Cases And Flirting Fighting

Glad Fyodor's finally dead, everyone's alive and we can go back to solving cases and flirting fighting with the PM :D

calxwalx
6 months ago

Aaaaaahhhhhhh

A Little Collection Of Dazai Being Fascinated By Chuuya Fighting
A Little Collection Of Dazai Being Fascinated By Chuuya Fighting
A Little Collection Of Dazai Being Fascinated By Chuuya Fighting
A Little Collection Of Dazai Being Fascinated By Chuuya Fighting
A Little Collection Of Dazai Being Fascinated By Chuuya Fighting
A Little Collection Of Dazai Being Fascinated By Chuuya Fighting

a little collection of Dazai being fascinated by Chuuya fighting

calxwalx
6 months ago

Hi πŸ‘‹, My name is Mohammad, and I’m reaching out in a moment of desperate need. I’m a father of three young children living in Gaza, and we are caught in the midst of a catastrophic war. Our home is no longer a safe haven, and the future here seems increasingly uncertain. πŸ’”

I’ve launched a fundraising campaign with the goal of raising $40,000 to relocate my family to a safer place where my children can grow up in peace and have a chance at a brighter future. πŸ•ŠοΈπŸ‡΅πŸ‡Έ

Unfortunately, my previous fundraising efforts were abruptly halted when my account was terminated without explanation. However, I remain determined to keep fighting for my family’s safety and well-being. 🫢

If you could take a moment to read our story, consider donating, or simply share our campaign with others, it would make an incredible difference. Every act of kindness, no matter how small, brings us one step closer to safety and a new beginning. πŸ™

Thank you for your time, compassion, and support. ❀

https://gofund.me/fd1faea2 πŸ”—

Go help them if you can <3

calxwalx
6 months ago

No.1 cunt server

Bonus:
Bonus:

Bonus:

Bonus:
Bonus:
Bonus:

Thank you for your precious service, beautiful Peanut variants!

calxwalx
6 months ago

Basically me the entire time

Grandfest Was Great

Grandfest was great

calxwalx
6 months ago

Most cunt served in the whole of hsr

Boothill, You Will Always Be Famous(ly Cunty)
Boothill, You Will Always Be Famous(ly Cunty)
Boothill, You Will Always Be Famous(ly Cunty)

Boothill, you will always be famous(ly cunty)

calxwalx
6 months ago

Cannon I was the his hat

Screwubbaboo

screwubbaboo

calxwalx
6 months ago

How dare you do this to me πŸ‘ΉπŸ‘ΉπŸ‘Ή

Maybe In Another Life
Maybe In Another Life

Maybe in another life

calxwalx
6 months ago

Yes.

May I Suggest Girlfailure Fem Dazai

may i suggest girlfailure fem dazai

calxwalx
6 months ago

😭😭😭

That One Mob Psycho Meme, Flags Edition

That one mob psycho meme, flags edition

calxwalx
6 months ago

Thank you πŸ™

Hi, you're lucky enough to come across to some pics of Kunikida today. You're welcome

Hi, You're Lucky Enough To Come Across To Some Pics Of Kunikida Today. You're Welcome
Hi, You're Lucky Enough To Come Across To Some Pics Of Kunikida Today. You're Welcome
Hi, You're Lucky Enough To Come Across To Some Pics Of Kunikida Today. You're Welcome
Hi, You're Lucky Enough To Come Across To Some Pics Of Kunikida Today. You're Welcome
Hi, You're Lucky Enough To Come Across To Some Pics Of Kunikida Today. You're Welcome
Hi, You're Lucky Enough To Come Across To Some Pics Of Kunikida Today. You're Welcome
calxwalx
6 months ago

I love them.

Do You See Them When You Look At The Stars, Tecchou-san?

do you see them when you look at the stars, tecchou-san?