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I'm cringe but free Gravity Falls brainrot

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CHAPTER 1 SUCKAS

You Make Hell Tolerable

Chapter 1: Hey ma, I can’t call for a while

The car drove slowly around the icy curve, the rails on the side covered in dents and scratches. Some of them were broken off. Getting into a car accident would not be ideal to say the least. Especially right now. Stanley tapped his fingers nervously around the steering wheel, trying his hardest to control his ragged breaths. Just a few hours ago he had been lounging around his motel room– the first motel room he had been able to afford in months– when he had received it. A postcard from Gravity Falls Oregon with the words “Please Come!” scribbled on the back. Without even looking at who the sender was, he had already known who the postcard was from. He had copied off that handwriting for almost 13 years. In a flash he had packed the belongings he felt were important and had driven off into the snowy roads.

“Get yourself together Stan, this is what you've been waiting for,” he glanced over to his passenger seat, knowing that underneath all the food containers and failed lottery tickets laid the picture of two sweaty teenage boys with smiles as they cheered arm in arm. “It’s only your brother. Your twin brother, it’s no big deal. You know he’s just your brother. The one who let you get kicked out of- no. I'm not going down that road, I'm NOT going to hold onto any resentment. I screwed him over. I did this to myself.”

Stan quickly wiped his sweaty palms on his jacket, his pep talk doing nothing to ease his nervousness. He grimaced as he felt the soft texture of the jacket become rough for a second, the bloody stains –both his own and of others– and other various stains from these last few months being the reason his jacket was rough and peeling in places. Not to mention that he hadn't had a chance to wash half of his clothes in a hot minute, he was sure it was becoming a health hazard. Maybe he should make a quick pit stop at a laundromat, he couldn’t have the first time he was seeing his brother in 10 years be with a jacket that was probably growing a new type of mold on it, a bloodied shirt, and pants that were far too stiff for his own liking. Not only was his clothing disgusting physically, but he was sure that the smell he was emitting was any better. Sure he had finally managed to shower before he left the motel but that didn’t really matter if his clothing weren’t in a similar condition. At the red stoplight he quickly pulled out his wallet. 10 dollars. A sigh left his lips as he returned his wallet pack into his glove compartment. Well now he had a couple of choices. Either he could go to the laundromat and just save the rest of his money for gas but that meant he wouldn’t be able to eat unless he went to a grocery store and “borrowed” some food. But even then he wasn’t sure that even with the money he would have left over that it would be enough to even get him halfway to his destination. Sweet Moses, what was he doing? He could barely afford to keep himself alive and now he was driving half way across the country just cause his brother sent him a postcard. After ten years of silence, after getting the curtains shut on him and being kicked out over one stupid mistake he was really going to help Ford? He could barely help himself, how was he supposed to help Ford? He wasn’t smart, he was anything but smart. He was useless. Worthless. He ruined everything he touched, he would just ruin this too. He was going to ruin this. He was- He turned the radio on not wanting to spiral down that dark abyss any longer.

You packed in the morning, I stared out the window

And I, struggled for something to say

You left in the rain without closing the door

I didn’t stand in your way

But I miss you more than I, missed you before

Stanley groaned, what a cheesy song, although it did sound familiar. He turned the radio down trying to recall where he had heard that song before. Passing an old pawn shop the memory of a woman in a red dress and golden hoop earrings humming softly in a small kitchen while she prepared lunch for three little boys resurfaced. Ma had always been the sentimental type who often thought that little moments like those were the ones that mattered. Whether it was listening to music while cooking, or looking outside the pawns window watching as people walked by while waiting for a call. Although, now he understood what she meant. Stanley had started enjoying the small moments, they were the ones where he could finally allow himself to relax and not have to face reality, even if it was for only a few minutes. It was the small moments the ones that had brought him the most comfort in the last 10 years.

Well folks that was the top 50 songs that you can listen to while reminiscing where everything went wrong! This is your host McDazzle and it is January 26 of the year 1982!

Right, it was January. He had to call his mom and Shermie soon. Mostly his mom. Although being on the run meant he shouldn’t leave a trace, he also didn't want to worry his mom.

After Stan had been kicked out he had cried so much, leaving his face blotchy red and puffy for days on end. A horrible mixture of anger, sorrow, and disgust swirled inside him as he waited, as he hoped, that either Ford or his dad came looking for him. After a few days of nothing but the cold silence, he had driven out of New Jersey. Almost two weeks later he decided to call his mom. They were on the phone for 10 minutes before she apologized for letting him get kicked out.

“Maybe it will blow off in a few more days, you know your dad.” her tone was hopeful, optimistic.

But Stan knew his dad. He crossed the line and now he was on his own. He remained silent throughout most of the phone call but assured his mom that he would call often. He kept that promise for the most part, calling at least one a month. At times Shermie would join the conversation, telling Stan everything from what he ate that morning to how his teacher got him and his friend in trouble for passing notes. He enjoyed those calls, they always made him feel lighter and they cleared his mind, even if he couldn’t tell them everything. The months he was stuck in that prison in Colombia had been rough to put it lightly. Actually these last 3 years have been especially rough. Let’s just say Rico made sure he got his part of his pay back. At least the stitches weren’t sloppy.

Finally he passed a billboard, Welcome to Arizona. He made his way to a semi empty parking lot. His car was running low on gas and well, a little siphoning never hurt anyone. Especially if he did want to make it to Oregon without losing all of his money. Looking around he noticed a phone booth outside the small grocery store where he was parked. He quickly rummaged through his car for any spare change. He counted making sure he did in fact have 15 cents and quickly gave one last look around before heading inside the booth. Inside was graffiti varying from drawing of dicks to what appeared to be a muffin? But the one that caught his eye was a small yellow triangle with a tophat. A shiver ran down his spine, it was weird. Something about it rang an alarm in his head, an itch that he couldn't scratch. But why? Ignoring that, and that horrible smell that reminded him of that time he was inside a trunk, he swiftly inserted the coins into the machine and punched the 10 digit number he had memorized since he was 5.

Ring

Ri- CLICK

“That’ll be 99 cents.”

He chuckled, “Wow Ma, not even a discount for your son?”

“Stanley? Oh my god,” she laughed quietly.

“Yup, in the flesh, or I guess in the voice?” He overheard a voice in a background, followed by steps that got louder with every second.

“Oh my god! Hi big bro! How you been old man?”

“Old? I’m only 28 thank you very much,” He snorted before erupting into full laughter, “Geez, I am getting old arent I? Eh but i've been good, how about you squirt? Have you been giving ma shit?”

“Stanley language-”

“Just the normal amount!” The younger pines interrupted, “ But ive been great! You remember that girl I told you about?”

“Uh yeah, the brunette from- what was it, uhhhhh-”

“Yeah! Thats the one! I ASKED HER ON A DATE AND SHE SAID YES!”

“He’s been going out with her for 3 weeks now, they’re practically glued together up to this point.” Stan smiled softly, almost envisioning his mom rolling her eyes before letting her face fall into a small smile with her crow eyes showing ever so slightly. Moses he missed her.

“Proud of you squirt I knew you could do it.”

“Thanks! I was so nervous, you want to hear how I asked her out? Well I had to go buy flowers because well of course she deserves flowers, but when I went to the-”

“Hey, uh, Shermie.” It was his turn to interrupt him this time. “As much as I want to listen to your lovesick ramblings, I gotta head out soon, let me talk to Ma real quick.”

“Booooo LAMEEE.” Shuffling was heard over the phone before settling into a small silence.

“Ma?”

“Yes pumpkin?” Worried laced her voice.

“I, um… Look, I don't think I’ll be able to call for a while. I'm going to be heading out in a few, um I’m…” Should he tell her he’s meeting with Ford? He didn’t like lying to his mom, he never has, but the thought of getting her hopes up for a reunion that could end in heartbreak was too much for him to bear. “Look I'm going to be helping an old pal, I wanted to make sure to tell you before I left because there aren’t really any phones out where we are going. Didn’t want to worry you if it took longer than expected.”

Silence.

She sighed. “You’re lying aren’t you? Stanley I… I’ve been having nightmares, well more like a reoccurring nightmare. It’s you and Ford. It starts off with you two as babies. Everytime I close my eyes you grow up just a bit. And right before I wake up, I close my eyes once more, and when I open them, one of you is missing and the other is a shadow. Stanley, please promise me, you’ll be okay.”

Sorrow laced her voice making Stan’s skin feel like it was being stabbed with tiny frozen needles, his breath caught in throat almost suffocating him. He forced himself to swallow the lump that had formed in his throat.

“I promise ma.”

He had driven for almost a whole day and his body and mind felt exhausted. His mom’s words plagued his mind feeling the anxiety bubble in his stomach, his skin felt numb and cold. Driving became a rather difficult task, and unhappily he pulled over deciding that taking a nap would be rather beneficial.

His dreams consisted of two small boys running towards their mom, both wearing their skin red from the sun and babbling about a forgotten boat that was now theirs.

1 nap later and a quick stop for more gas and another to the laundromat, he was in front of a shack. It looked both brand new and worn down, as if no one had been caring for it. A wooden sign hung outside the door with red painting KEEP OUT. Okay? He hoped he was in the right place, shaking off any remaining nerves as he made his way to the door.

“Okay, moment of truth.” He knocked.

At first there was silence, followed by cursing and frantic shuffling. He straightened himself out. Finally the knob turned.

“WHO IS IT? HAVE YOU COME TO STEAL MY EYES?”

A crossbow was shoved in Stan’s face. He gasped as he leaned away, capturing the aggressor's face. He recognized the features on his face as his own, apart from the bloodshot eyes and overgrown patchy beard, he could still recognize Ford.

“Well, I can always count on you for a warm welcome.”

“Stanley?” Ford lowered his crossbow and adjusted his glasses, studying Stan’s face. His eyes softened slightly as he recognized his twin. But it only lasted for a second. He pulled Stan inside as he flashed a light into his eyes. “Did anyone follow you? Anyone at all? Does anyone know you were coming here?”

“I-UGH HEY, what is this?” Stan pushed Ford stumbling lightly as his vision came back. “Ugh I- you know what it doesn’t matter, no I wasn’t followed.”

Ford relaxed, letting his shoulder hang as he let out a breath. “Sorry! I just had to make sure-uh. It’s nothing.”

Ford clutched his trench coat as he waved Stanley down further into his house. Papers littered almost every surface of the house along with various cups filled with brown liquid that gave the stench of coffee. Machinery was placed around what he presumed was the living room with various numbers and letters displaying on the screen. One of them had a triangular prism, another one appeared to just show an electrical current.

“Look, you're gonna explain what's going on here? You're acting like mom after her tenth cup of coffee.” Stanley exclaimed as he followed Ford up to his desk. He saw him look through some papers collecting a few pages and what appeared to be a hardcover red book.

“Listen there isn’t much time,” Ford turned around walking past Stanley, his voice laced with worry and exhaustion, one Stan himself was too familiar with. “I’ve made huge mistakes, and I don't know who I can trust anymore.

Stans eyebrows furrowed in concern.

“Hey easy there.” He placed what he hoped would be perceived as a reassuring hand on Ford’s shoulder, “Let’s talk this through, okay?”

“I have something to show you, something you won’t believe.”

“Look I've been around the world, okay? Whatever it is, I'll understand.” Well world was an understatement and saying been could be better said as chased but that was a different story for another time. Ford looked sick, exhausted, on the verge of breaking. It was unsettling.

“There is nothing about this that I understand.”

Yes Stanley had never been the smart twin, or just smart period. But this? It looked like it came straight out of one of his old superhero comics. Like one of those where the hero has to stop a doomsday device that the villain of the story was creating to end all of humanity. And this was-it was, well it was something. It looked like a machine, its purpose unknown to Stan. The centerpiece was a huge upside triangle with bright blue symbols marked throughout the circular center it, what appeared to be circular beams receding on the sides. In front of it was a handle with a bright red button. He felt the little alarm in his brain go off once more.

“It’s a trans-universal gateway,” Ford explained, “a punched hole through a weak spot in our dimension. I created it to unlock the mysteries of the universe. But it could just as easily be harnessed for terrible destruction.”

Well guess I wasn’t that far off. Stanley though to himself.

Ford brought the book from earlier up to eye view. “That's why I shut it down and hid my journals, which explain how to operate it. There is only one journals left.” Ford walked up to Stanley, now clutching the journal with both his shaky hands. “And you are the only person I can trust to take it.”

He handed the journal over to Stan, who observed it with thoughtful eyes. The red leather felt rough against his fingers, in the center was a six fingered golden hand with the number 1 written on it with blank ink. It looked worn out. This was Ford’s research. And he was trusting Stanley with it. He still trusted him, even after all this time.

“I have something to ask of you.” Stan looked at him with hopeful eyes, “Remember our plans to sail the world on a boat?”

Oh? OH! This was it, everything Stanley had wanted. A smile broke on his face hope filling his body. Finally after all these years he was getting his brother back, even after messing up and being nothing but a burden he now had the chance to make up for it. He would help Stanford and now he would get to fulfill his dreams of traveling with his brother, his best friend!

“Take this book, get on a boat and sail as far away as you can. To the edge of the earth. Bury it where no one can find it” Ford turned his back and walked away.

His hope was immediately shattered, now replaced with raw anger. Of course. THIS is what he should've expected, THIS was Ford’s style, not a sappy family reunion that Stan had been hoping for. Of course he would only be useful to Ford if it meant getting him as far away as possible. He felt himself explode.

“That's IT?!” You finally want to see me after ten years and it’s to tell me to get as far away from you as possible?”

“Stanley, you don’t understand what I'm up against. What I've been through!”

“No no you don't understand what I've been through. I’ve been to prison in three different countries. I once had to chew my way out of a trunk of a car. You think you've got problems? I’ve got a mullet Stanford!” That last one sounded petty, but he understood the meaning of being too broke, too unable to even afford a haircut. But he doubted his brother would even understand. He was tired, oh so deeply tired, anxious, and devastated. “Meanwhile where have you been, living it up in your fancy house in the woods! Selfishly hoarding your college money because you only care about yourself!”

“I'm selfish? I'M selfish, Stanley? How can you say that after costing me my dream school! I’m giving you the chance to do the first worthwhile thing in your life and you won’t even listen!”

Stan felt his chest tighten, thinking about his worthlessness was one thing, but hearing it come out of the one person who you had always hoped cared even just a tiny bit was just agonizing. He felt that numbness from earlier return to his fingers, his eyes stung with tears that he would not allow to fall, a lump formed inside his throat. Maybe he should’ve listened and gotten out of there when Ford told him to, but of course, everything he does always leads to failure. Fuck it, it was too late to go back now.

“Well listen to this.” He pulled out his lighter “You want me to get rid of this book? Fine, I’ll get rid of it right now.” He held the flame right underneath the book, but two hands came pulling the book away from the flame. Stanley kept his grip tightly on the journal still having the lighter on in his other hand.

“NO! You don’t understand!” Fear flashed over Ford’s face, but it was too late for Stanley to care.

“You said you wanted me to have it so I’ll do what I want with it!. "Stan yanked the book holding it up against the flame once more.

“My research!”

Ford tackled Stan causing both of them to fall. The lighter fell next to Stan while the journal skidded across the floor towards their feet. Stan quickly swiped his lighter, placing it in his pocket. He turned around seeing Ford standing to get to his Journal. Stan pushed his foot out causing Ford to trip and land on his face. Stan stood up and ran grabbing the journal and heading towards the door.

“STANLEY GIVE IT BACK!” He felt himself once again being pushed, this time his back hit the metal door causing them to fall inside.

He landed over a control panel hearing some whirring come to life.

“You want it back? You’re going to have to try harder than that!” Stanley pushed against his brother's face, both falling against the floor once more. “You left me behind, you jerk! It was supposed to be us forever. You ruined my life! “ His voice was raw, croaking as he tried to hold back his tears. He continued to tug at the journal.

“YOU RUINED YOUR OWN LIFE!” Ford’s foot shot out pressing against his chest, he felt as his jacket burned off as hot searing pain made its way onto his right shoulder. Stanley screamed, his mind went blank, black dots spread throughout his vision, and he felt a coldness wash over his body. The smell of burned skin filled the room. Ford's foot finally stopped pressing against his skin.

“Stanley! Oh my gosh I’m so sorry!” Knuckles connected to his face as pain was replaced by adrenaline. Stan got up clutching his shoulder, picking up the journal from where Ford had dropped it. He walked past him looking at the machine that was now swirling with life.

“Some brother you turned out to be. You care more about some dumb mysteries than your family. Ten years of silence, you didn’t care about anyone but yourself. Not until you needed something” He turned back to face his brother, his face contoured in anger. “Was I just a pawn in your game, sixer?”

“Don’t- DON’T CALL ME THAT” Ford pushed his brother once again landing on the floor with the amount of force he used.

Stan felt himself being lifted into the air. His body felt weightless, a force was pulling him back and he screamed.

“FORD- STANFORD WHAT’S GOING ON?”

“STANLEY- oh no no no NO!” Ford tried to stand up only to be caught in the wiring. Hands shook as he attempting to detangle himself he looked up as his twin got closer to the to the portal.

“STANFORD HELP ME! PLEASE, STANFORD HELP ME-” he fell through the portal. In an instant everything turned white. A shock wave caused Ford to land on his back as his brother's cries were drowned out.

Mechanical whirring eased to a stop. Screams were silenced.

Everything was silent.

CHAPTER 1 SUCKAS

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