Rebornfell Page 21, In Which Sans Is Absolutely Done With Having His Face Squished In A Metal Armpit.

Rebornfell page 21, in which Sans is absolutely done with having his face squished in a metal armpit.

THANK YOU FOR PUTTING UP WITH THE DELAY October/November was super busy with other projects (namely the horrorswap story, cake making, and pet sitting) but I hope this page was worth the wait! Chances are this will be the last page of 2017 as I have secret Santa and holiday stuff to focus on, but I want to thank everyone for reading! This project has gone on slightly over a year now thanks to your support! So long as people out there still enjoy the series I’ll keep working on it!

Previous page- HERE!

Next page- HERE!

Read from the start HERE!

Wish to help support me further? You can buy me a coffee cocoa here!

A question... Why is Undyne an angel? I am curious...

Alright, well, in Reborntale wether or not a monster becomes and angel or demon depends on their mental state at death. How they feel about others, how they feel about themselves. Undyne is a protector- a role that in my opinion she has to be even stronger in the underfell universe because the underground contains more dangers. She has her work cut out for her as captain of the royal guard keeping innocent monsters safe. She fights to keep everyone else safe to the bitter end, trying her best to hang on to stop the human in a genocide run even as her fragile monster body fails her. Undyne also believes not only in her own abilities, but in the abilities of those close to her- she might be a bit agressive in how she shows her support but her intentions are in the right place and for monsters intent is everything. 

Hope this answers your question!

Secret Santa gift for @agraulisvanillae!

Have some fanart of Pandora’s family from The Hero with Crimson Eyes! Hope you enjoy small child Pandora enjoying family story time!

vv Design yourself here vv

https://bebinator.com/

*tightly hugs you both*

Seriously though, just, all of this. I struggle with these kinds of feelings a lot too, honestly I still don’t think to highly of my own abilities but the fact that other people enjoy my work helps greatly. Honestly any positive reaction is a pleasant surprise.

Growing up was very stressful for me. It wasn’t that I had a bad upbringing, but rather that dealing with my various mental health issues has just been difficult. Heck, I didn’t start getting treatment for my depression and anxiety until this year! They didn’t just suddenly appear I have struggled with both since I was a kid. Years of being told I wasn’t trying hard enough, that I was lazy, when really I was trying as hard as I could.

Being told you’re not even trying when giving it your all... then getting better results and praise when you barely try at all... makes it feel like any effort at all just isn’t worth it. It was like the more I tried to make something that I thought was good, the less people liked it. School was hell, especially middle school. I was made fun of for not being athletic and due to my communication issues and the fact I struggled to get homework done, well my classmates pretty much thought I was stupid and the teachers shoved me into the classes with all the “problem” students who disrupt class which in turn made actually learning anything in class more difficult. Then, the stuff I was good at? Drawing, coming up with stories, people made fun of that too.

I genuinely felt like I wasn’t good at anything. Sometimes I still feel like that. That no matter how hard I try it will never be good enough.

If I had talked to someone back then about these feelings I could have gotten help sooner, but I never thought my problems were severe enough to warrant asking for help. I was just “oversensitive” and “had to learn how to deal with it”, I had trouble voicing my problems and the fact that most crying fits just got dismissed by those around me didn’t help. I would break down and wind up huddled against a wall in tears on a near daily basis when I was in school. Nobody ever said anything to my parents. The other kids learned to just ignore me and the near daily mental breakdowns earned me the reputation of being a manipulative faker. Nobody around me took my emotions seriously, therefore they must not be important, so... I got into the habit of just, letting my feelings take a back seat to what I thought needed to be done and happen.

I never told my mom that I hated the after school program because I knew the reason I was there was because both my parents were still at work, I put their work hours above my mental health and needs. I thought I was stronger for it at the time.

I think I trailed off topic there. But, yeah, I still think of myself as a pretty ordinary and unremarkable person. Sometimes less than that, but it’s getting better. Having supportive friends to talk to is a huge part of that, and with a lot of them being fellow creatives it also allows for the sharing of ideas and advice and tips, which is a lot more fun that daydreaming ideas alone. (I did that a lot growing up, it’s really nice to have people to share them with who are actually interested!)

The Art of Self-Depreciating

I feel the need to explain a little something about self-depreciating commentary, and while I can’t speak for the others, I think creative people tend to have this… condition.

As you see, I call it an art. Again, I cannot speak on the behalf of others, but for me, it’s become a habit if not a way of life. I feel that unless you happen to have a particular personality, maybe get in with the right group of friends at the right time, happen to have a style that’s widely accepted from the get-go, your first experiences showing your talents have more negative than positive effects.

Not only were my writing interests (sci-fi and fantasy, mostly), a bit odd at the time, but the fact that I did have trouble expressing myself verbally and my reading and writing was too advanced at the time to express myself there either, I learned really quickly that in order to emotionally survive, it was best to downplay my abilities. Couple that with an older sibling who needed all attention on them, and allowing a lot of attention to be given to the younger (who was the only boy in a household of girls), being shuffled into the background and trying to be the one who was always okay, well, you get a recipe for someone who used self-depreciating as a way of life.

Modesty also has a hand in it. I took childhood stories, fables, and fairy tales maybe a little too seriously. I believed in their lessons, and hell, I still do. Anyone who boasted too much, was too proud of themselves, something horrible always happened to them. I kinda wished some adult back then would have told me that there’s no reason to hide or downplay my abilities and that there was a difference between celebrating your talents and being a braggart. I needed that My Little Pony episode with Trixy back then XD

So, much like other quirks of people who suffered from past experiences (a lot of victims of abuse are always apologizing, for example), self-depreciating just became a habit, a gut reaction, a way of life, a way to survive. That’s my personal take on it, and perhaps others can look into themselves and figure out why they do it, too. To those of you out there, our amazing friends and followers who don’t see why these lovely, talented people are so hard on themselves, please be patient with us. There is usually a reason behind it, and usually we are still trying to heal, so please keep being awesome to us - you don’t have to go overboard, but the assurance that our talents are meaningful helps, and hopefully, one day, we will begin to believe it ourselves.

Decided to try a little experiment today, working with a single color in different tones and levels of saturation while designing a character. Sad blue was the first, then @agraulisvanillae suggested they needed a friend maybe something with dryad like features so- now there’s two! Two genie friends doing their best to make the most of their imprisonment by mortals.

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