The Importance Of Discernment.

The importance of discernment.

So I’ve gotten a bunch of asks and tweets asking me whether or not we should be worried about the impending explosion of the largest volcano on Earth (which I happen to live very nearby). No, you should not.

This latest round of speculation was sparked by a YouTube video…yes, literally a single...

Hey there, I've been reading The Tao Te Ching, books about Lieh-Tzu and listening to Taoist podcasts for almost a year now. Still trying to navigate Taoism in my own life as a university student. I am unsure how the concept of just being fits in with someone like myself who lacks motivation but also has great ambition? I don't know whether to kick back and let my emotions steer or what... what really is the Tao way to approach things there?

I'd say the first thing is to take a moment and step back, to take a breath and try to look at things with fresh eyes.

What is your ambition for? Do you want to make a great impact, or climb to the top of the social ladder, or be widely known across the world, or something entirely different? Defining our goals clearly is one of the simplest things we can do to find direction in life, but it's often overlooked. It's understandable to not know the EXACT path or destination we want out of life, but the more honest you can be with yourself, the better.

And if your ambition is truly great, with it comes the motivation to pursue it. In my experience, when people say they lack motivation it often actually means that they have motivation, but also have a lot of self-doubt or fear preventing them from embracing that motivation. We must all learn to release those doubts and fears, and remind ourselves that our desire to achieve our goals should always outweigh those obstacles in the way.

Letting our passions guide us is the ideal, especially when those passions keep us moving forward towards that which truly makes us happy. This is different, however, than letting our emotions steer us around, which can just as easily lead to heartbreak and sadness as it can to joy. When we find something we are passionate about, we will march on ever forward, through the hard work and setbacks and negative emotions that come along the way. It won't feel like kicking back, but more like running down a hill towards your great ambition. That is where your motivation will come from, and this is how the Path will guide you.

Fear is your best friend or your worst enemy. It’s like fire. If you can control it, it can cook for you; it can heat your house. If you can’t control it, it will burn everything around you and destroy you. If you can control your fear, it makes you more alert, like a deer coming across the lawn.

Mike Tyson (via mmaquotes)

Daoism in practice.

Could you elaborate more on the topic of defending ourselves (or our journey) to others? Why do we do this? Recently, I left a career and lost a father to cancer. One of the most difficult things has been explaining to friends the path that I am choosing. I have decided to take some time off to explore the things in life that really matter to me. This answer seems to make others uncomfortable. Then I hold back for fear of being judged for my decision. I find myself avoiding certain friends.

Any time I have found myself defensive, it has always come from a place of insecurity. If I have a way I want to be perceived, an acceptance/understanding I want to find from others, or something inside that I’m trying to ignore, then defensiveness arises. 

For example, I had a difficult time finding a job after college. Many places were happy to give internships but then had no intention of hiring further down the line. I switched fields a few times, trying to find something that would click. 

In the meantime, many of my friends were gainfully employed. And just as I couldn’t understand what it was like to be working full-time after college, they couldn’t understand what it was like to be unemployed facing continual rejection. 

I cringed at the typical social questions asking what I do, where I’m going, and so on. 

The funny thing is that those questions are almost entirely insincere. The people asking them have no real interest in your path. They are just seeking an easy way to understand you. “Oh, he’s a banker” or “He’s going back to school” and so on. 

Real life is messy. It doesn’t always come together cleanly. For those who don’t fit into pre-existing schemas, any of those social questions cannot be met with a simple answer. It’s more of a conversation than just a response. But again, most of the people asking aren’t interested in that.

So what do you do? I just stopped explaining and defending myself. Once I realized that people’s thoughts about me were incredibly divorced from the reality of being me, I stopped putting so much weight on what they thought—and vice versa. I don’t put a lot of stock in the thoughts I have about other people.

The only understanding you live with and the only understanding you require is your own. But you must be wholly honest and upfront with yourself on a moment to moment basis. 

And since these “what do you do” and other typical social questions are just bullshit inquiries, I usually just give bullshit answers. “I’m exploring self-consistent field methods for determining wave functions of polyelectronic atoms,” is one way to shift the conversation. 

Try approaching social interaction more like a game of self-expression rather than a battlefield of identity, it is much more peaceful and amusing that way. 

I’d definitely recommend the book The Places That Scare You by Pema Chodron. I also lost my father to cancer and I understand it must be a very difficult experience to go through. But you have a wealth of strength and love inside yourself, which you will naturally uncover when you shift your focus from trying to find it outside. 

I will admit, these sorts of circumstances do tend to make clear who your real friends are.

Namaste my friend much love

I believe all suffering is caused by ignorance. People inflict pain on others in the selfish pursuit of their happiness or satisfaction. Yet true happiness comes from a sense of inner peace and contentment, which in turn must be achieved through the cultivation of altruism, of love and compassion and elimination of ignorance, selfishness and greed. The problems we face today, violent conflicts, destruction of nature, poverty, hunger, and so on, are human-created problems which can be resolved through human effort, understanding and the development of a sense of brotherhood and sisterhood. We need to cultivate a universal responsibility for one another and the planet we share. Although I have found my own Buddhist religion helpful in generating love and compassion, even for those we consider our enemies, I am convinced that everyone can develop a good heart and a sense of universal responsibility with or without religion.

The Dalai Lama, Nobel Peace Prize Acceptance Speech - 1989 (via lazyyogi)

Great words from HH.