Random A** Headcanons

Random a** headcanons

Jame T. Kirk x Ostaran!reader

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again

so damn clingy and gives the best hugs

like the ones that linger to the point where eventually you’re just cuddling in an upright position

will pet your ears hair while you guys are just hanging out in your quarters

will never understand how you can eat so many vegetables

“That’s like eating the garnish, why would you do that???”

Jokingly leaves you things for your nest as though he were worshipping at an altar

“Oh mighty bunny darling, please accept this measly mortal offering of a fluffy blanket and a snack!”

you just grumble halfheartedly and pull him and the offerings into your nest

@finallyforgotten I hope this small offering will temporarily satiate your hunger for Ostaran!reader while I work on getting the inspiration for something more substantial! 🐰

Teacher's Pet part 7

Synopsis: The first time.

A/n: I'm touch starved. And illiterate. Please enjoy! I cried 3 times writing this. Also, to my mutuals, I love you. To my readers, I love you. To Peter Capaldi, Sir??? Please??? One chance! To the 12th doctor, come home the kids miss you...

Oh, her face. The nervous look was delicious. The way she was trying to throw her weight around. The way she was making these cords of rationalization and connections.

His little doe-eyed human. A fawn. Maybe he’d call her that…

The way that she came undone. Of course, he felt her heart rate accelerating. Dangerously close to deafening. Her pupils dilated and sharpened, the little hitch her breathing took.

He felt himself give in to the animal. A byproduct of his exposure to Earthlings. His body adjusted and he felt all too eager to feel like an ape. Act like an ape. Not a species that rose above physical reproduction and it’d many impulses. Missy was right. These Earth girls were dangerous.

This was a very coordinated dance he was playing. Give her a bit of a taste of the real grandeur. Something in both mind and body so intimate.

She wasn’t wrong, as she said he was playing God. Perceptive. Very. He liked that about her, saw things from a side of the map others didn’t, even if she went in an atypical way.

He crowded himself in her brain in such a miniscule way as he closed in on her. Ending the space between them.

But he wasn’t going to leap until she gave him a clear sign of consent. He wasn’t a monster, of course. Just a man. A man with needs at the end of the day.

“Maybe.” She shivered. Getting further under his spell.

“Maybe isn’t good enough.” He pushed on her further. Getting closer.

He saw her give up and in.

There was his cue! He gripped the chair, letting his hands to brush onto hers.

She let her head shake in affirmation.

Game over. He won.

He went in, crushing her lips with a biting kiss. Cutting deeply between her breaths. He removed one hand from his grasp on the chair and tenderly grasped the angle of her face between it. Fully feral, taking what he was owed.

He was watching her eyes and saw the startled look fading. Something that spoke against her dignity and guard. It was real, real and he invoked it in her! A victory! Clear and concise!

He convinced himself to pull himself off of her. Give her the option of comfort.

“Now darling…” He muttered, petting her hair. “I can take you here on this chair. Or the floor.”

Her famous thinking and asymmetrical wit fired back.

“Make it a cliché. Fuck me on the desk.” She heaved. Collecting herself before leading herself there.

“Your wish is my command.”

She already was starting to remove her clothes. Already well-trained. He wouldn’t have to break her in as a companion. Maybe she wouldn’t be fate to a dark tragedy if he took her off to the stars.

He shook himself of those tragic thoughts.

He’d keep her here on Earth. His little safe secret. His to keep, his to cherish. To own. Away from covetous eyes or unforeseen consequences.

Maybe one day he’d introduce Missy to her. Trot her out. Have her behold his wares. His reward.

The possibilities were endless.

Back in the present moment, however. He had a beautiful woman, wet and ready on his desk.

He turned the photo of Susan around and put it face down.

His cock was hardening.

He quickly undid his trousers and produced a condom from his back pocket. He valued her illusions of safety. He doubted that he’d impregnate or infect her. But she’d probably thank him for the consideration.

He grasped the nape of her neck, curling a fistful of her hair in his grasp. Inhaling the scent, perfume, sweat, her pheromones and a trace of tobacco and the outdoors. An ode to her environments. He took and pulled her forward and lain flat against the surfaces.

Popping kisses across her breasts and caressing her throat with his lips and practically lapping up the beginning of a moan coming from her mouth.

His other hand got busy, she had to be ready for him. He could give her that. A bit of pleasure before he properly entered her. A long finger snaked it’s way to her pussy.

He could be different. He was. A trillion times better. No human man could outdo him.

He slowly stroked her clit with his thumb as he parted her folds. Delicate work. Like rewiring the TARDIS or building a device to track and contain shadow creatures from the 12th dimension. Miniscule little circles speeding up on the throbbing little head. Her entire cunt was slick. Made the entry with his middle finger deft into the tight center.

She was very muscular down there. It was a nice, tight vice grip. Would be great to feel with his twitching cock. His balls were aching…

His little fawn was starting to relax her grip on the desk, she leaned back like a very good girl and her legs sprawled open further. Her back arched up and her breathing hitched a bit more again. Her head cocked to the side and she watched him, her hands playing with themselves as they rest on her stomach.

“Show me some courage.” He goaded, slipping another finger inside. “You’ve been wanting this. I’ve seen you. I’ve noticed how you can’t stop watching me. Wanting me. Poor (y/n), can’t focus on her studies because of clever old me.”

He worked her deeper, as she rushed out a caustic, “Fuck you.” She clenched herself around his fingers. “Fuck you for making me want you!” She tried to accuse as she whimpered along.

“There’s a doll.” He said before releasing his grasp on her cunt. He could take that response.

He leaned forward and kissed her as he put on the condom. She grasped his hair and replied wordlessly, ferociously. Her breath tasted of her freshly consumed hot chocolate, old mint and honey tea, a cigarette and some mix of dental products. There was revelation and acceptance in her eyes and screaming loudly from her mind.

He wondered if, with the way she was broadcasting, if anyone sensitive enough to these frequencies in the next solar system over was picking it up.

Laying an arm across her chest and one braced on the desk. It was time.

He slowly thrust into her. A nice, even motion. Working slowly and evenly, he made sure that he was careful to not cause any pain. He’d forgotten a very important aspect of sex with humans, they needed lubrication to keep it nice and more than pleasurable. He hoped what little came on the condom already and how soaked she was would keep things feeling nice for her. He was spoken for.

He leaned down, putting the full weight of his body on her and went a little harder and a little faster. Whispering in her praise about what a good and patient human she was. That she was so smart and clever. A good student. And a new bright star in his personal cosmos.

His little pet fawn rocked her hips up, trying to match his pace in synchronization.

Eventually matching his.

It was a delight! He resisted the urge to go faster, even though time was running out. He didn’t exactly hang a sock on the door. Someone was bound to walk in. But he let himself luxuriate in the experience of his flesh on hers.

(Y/n) put her hands on his shoulders and brought herself up around, bucking up and trying to get herself to go faster. A hazy, lost clouded her face. But her jaw was determined.

What else could he do but oblige? He sped up, grunting. He would finish them both up.

He felt himself fluster and her legs kick up around his body.

An electric shot of pleasure rocked through his body and arched out from him, he could feel a monumental shudder come as he orgasmed. The tips of his fingers felt numb and his hearts beat alight in his chest- echoed by the singular heart in hers. All three pounding as he cupped her and brought her to a sitting position, pulling himself out of her.

He purred, as he pulled the used condom off his shaft. A gentle lob into the bin dealt with that.

“Are you still needy, darling? Want me to Doctor it?” He chuckled internally at his little joke.

“Yes, please, Professor.” She cried out. Clearly not finished. He reminded himself to correct her at another time and inform her of his true Chosen Name. But for now she needed to cum. He could do that for her.

He got on both knees and brushed her swollen, raw eager cunt.

He was like a man on death row, and his last meal was served.

He kissed her inner thighs and wrapped an arm around her thighs. He kissed her folds and gave a little suck and her knees automatically buckled towards his head. Her hands playfully combing through his hair. He continued to kiss and nibble and lick. Deeper and harder. More attention to her clit…

Her moans and grunts turned to suppressed screams. She was thrashing around his desk beautifully.

“Oh, I’m so close!” She confessed after a particularly hard to hold in shout.

He rewarded her with her orgasm.

Static electricity passed between then it seemed. A connecting current. Good, he thought, bonding.

Somehow, they ended up on the floor in front of his desk and she was wrapped in her jacket and his hoodie was laid on top of her legs. His pants were still pulled down to his shoes.

She spoke first.

It was shaky and her stammer was back.

“I don’t want to seem rude…but I don’t want to…not…do this again. And don’t think I did this for…wrong reasons. Please… don’t give me special treatment…because I let you hit…I never wanted this to happen…or had any ulterior motives. I really liked you. From the first class I had with you…I…yeah.” She seemingly couldn’t finish the sentence. She started to bring her hand up to rip off a finger nail.

The Doctor stopped her, bringing her hand down and resting it on her lap, his firmly on top.

“Yeah. Me too. I don’t take lovers anymore. I don’t need a distraction, but you? Wandered into my classroom like a fawn separated from its mother too early. A mystery. And of course you aren’t. I’ve seen your ethics. You may have some push and pull. But you’re still not a cheat. You would have found other ways to get ahead if you were…”

“Yeah.” She stared at the carpet.

“You’ll get special treatment because you’re special.”

“Oh.”

“Why don’t I whatsapp you? We can discuss this further. I have a class to teach soon. And you have your life.”

The two cleaned up, dressed up, swapped numbers and the Doctor kissed her hand gingerly.

He had to think.

“Don’t be lasagne.” He said. Shaking his head at a memory.

“Okay…I won’t.” (Y/n) shot him a puzzled look.

“And please, (y/n) take the hot chocolate.”

She reached down and took it before scurrying out.

Putting the picture of Susan back in place, he smiled at the guitar on the wall…

Lots to plot, more to do.

She might be perfect yet!

second one

serious question, what’s the best time to post a fanfiction for best engagement on a tag??

do most spencer reid x reader followers have a set bedtime of nine o clock after a warm glass of milk and a fic or two

or do we all lay awake until four in the morning, eyes crusted open until we read the whole tag???

lemme know

Teacher's Pet part 17

Synopsis: The Doctor muses on the nature of what he could do, the reader is a willing accomplice to her own life.

A/n: first off, I'd like to thank @queerconfusionthings on the slightly darker tone of this chapter and our long talks about 12, it changed this chapter. You get me in a way precious others do...and to all my readers, yall are best. To my mutuals, I'd die for you. Especially those who don't share my needs here. Love u.

It started to border on experimental. So many untapped valleys and choices he could make now that his pet fawn was solidly by his side, and now bound to leave him, no matter how dire the situation or how many red flags or fears the ghosts of his past could bequeath to her. (Y/N) was firmly in his grasp. Perhaps indefinitely.

There were certain thought experiments that were hypothetical that he was taught at the academy. How to not just bind a weaker species to your mind not just in mind, but in blood. The facets of addiction was the singular universal trait of all sentient life in the cosmos. He admitted that he was becoming as addicted to her as she was to him, and those nasty substances she would take.

He was of half a mind to remove their influence on her body and substitute them for him. As they walked through Kew Gardens, he mused on that. Take the urge that crippled her for drinks and cigarettes to the point of clouding her thoughts at times, bind those starved out brain cells to the idea of him. The swap from nicotine and ethyl alcohol to the Doctor would he fairly easy to do.

Ultimately, after she flashed him a smile and kissed him on the cheek before heading to the loo, he decided against it. For now.

She was getting beyond handsy…almost to the point of him being begged to fuck her in public. Maybe the switch was happening naturally. The addiction to the physical was clearly getting stronger…

Wouldn’t he be so lucky?

He’d have another full-scale rifle in her mind soon to assess the current situation!

Maybe he was more like the Rani than he’d previously assessed…

Wouldn’t that just choke the life from Missy? Her precious parallels dashed in the face if him ending up much more like their estranged friend turned mutual foe.

Whatever the case in this poorly-plotted and infinitely nailed-out love story he was crafting, the Doctor was sure of one thing. His reputation as the universe’s biggest savior, it’s self-inserted martyr needed to stay intact. Missy knew to some extent. Missy could feel and reveled in his own self-corruption at the hands of this mere human.

Missy would, even if she wanted to escape, keep this secret. Their rivalry and comrades and millennia-long bond, despite how fucked up it was, or how many times they’d kill or fight one another was iron-clad.

Honor among thieves or something…

The idea of some sort of vivisection briefly clouded his vision as he saw her exit the toilets. She was beaming. She held her jacket in her hand and her teeth caught in the light.

He decided against that idea.

There were opportunities endlessly flowing out.

“Hey, I’m absolutely starving!” She pulled him by the ties on his hoodie. “Do you want to go to a pub after this? There’s got to be a really good one that does a lovely roast dinner or something.”

Totally clueless, totally obvious to the danger she was in. So fine-tuned to weird shadows and knew when a human man on the street was up to no good. She didn’t know that the real predator was getting the aglets of his hoodie flicked around.

Poor her. Poor little fawn. Fully in the wolf’s maw and her neck was already snapped. Lost in the too-dark woods, separated from her herd. Only the guidance of that would come had made a meal of her. And was toying her corpse out further…

He felt his cock stiffen.

Maybe he would take her tonight. Just until bleeding. See how far her dependence on her would go. Maybe degrade her a bit.

If he could, he would. Wasn’t it his right?

He did own her, after all. Everyone from the team at UNIT to that last scrappy remnant of Torchwood saw her over-the-moon, fully-tethered ache for him…

They all picked up on something far more grasping than mere companion in their relationship. He wasn’t risking her life and breaking her spirit on planets far outside her home solar system. A dark, full-bodied compatriot. An equal lover. Perhaps they would arrive at the conclusion of his idea of settling down on Earth.

Not like their human opinions mattered in the end…

“Yes, of course.” He returned her eager, lavish smile with one of his own.

He slammed these thoughts back in the dark chest that was his mind. For now he’d just play with her hormones and her mind. Just put them at maximum. Continue this charade.

Keep everyone and everyone in the dark…

It was a great rest of the day, a butterfly landed on her arm. She delicately picked it up to rest on her finger and it stayed put as if she was her own form of magic. The little insect crawled around and she led it to rest on his jacket.

“He’s probably picking up the sugar scrub I used last night.” She rationalized.

“Or you’re just preternaturally sweet.” He let out the cheesy line as it flicked itself off his being and flew into the air. She shot him a bemused sideways glance. When she finally got it off her finger and it was firmly on his being she slightly shook her head and rolled her eyes.

Obviously, it didn’t take a liking to him.

It’s instincts were far better tuned.

He took her to the closest pub. It wasn’t doing a roast dinner that night. She was put out, but ordered chips with a gin and tonic and some little sandwich thing.

His Earth girls really loved their chips.

Maybe that was his type? Little, bold Earth girls with loud minds that could devour nothing but chips for all eternity and be perfectly happy doing so.

He could live with that…

She went out for a cigarette and he mentally made contact with Missy.

She ‘picked up’ the mental receiver.

‘How goes London, you filthy old man?’ The words shot into his mind like an icicle from a roof.

‘Fine, just curious, how much attention did you pay to Professor Hedflonhorzthenethar’s lessons on groove-making in lesser species?’

‘Rapt, Doccy. Why?’

‘Send me your memories, I’ll Amazon a tuba to my office.’

Another betrayal of the morals he started this regeneration with…

‘Let me see you do it. I’ll only do it if you do it now and let me look through your eyes!’ It was sharp, it felt like she was beside him shouting it.

He gave her permission to see through his eyes. He sighed and whipped out his phone, ordered a tuba and closed up the connect to his eyes.

The entirety of her memories regarding the lessons pinged into his brain like an email or perhaps a text notification…

His little fawn slid back onto the barstool next to him as Missy closed the line…

‘Don’t break her yet! I want to be her friend! I’m so lonely!’

He could still feel her teasing pout lingering in his brain. Perhaps she left it as a taste of his own medicine.

“The night’s getting cooler.” (Y/N) informed.

“Pity, you’ll need to cover up.”

Her mind was clearly projecting images of her taking him to the toilets and fucking him in the stall. Loudly.

Her mind was wandering, she kept admiring the line of his brow and the way his fingers crossed over as he held the glass of Fanta he was slowly sipping. She needed him in ways that would shock perhaps even Captain Jack Harkness or perhaps that smaller, dark shadow that used to follow him around, John Hart was his name?

A pathetic kicked dog that craved the Captain’s attention…

Just like him and Missy.

He shook his head at that particular parallel.

Probably the advantage of dating someone in her profession. She knew what was avant-garde in sex!

Or at least for a human of her time period that had never been off-planet…

The Doctor let his mind wander into hers. Despite her clear projection, he wanted to see exactly what the damage of the last night was. She was chattering on about a philosophy book she picked up for between clients and for downtime at work. She completed it and wanted to share her critiques of it and her ways she’d probably improve upon the messages. As well as what she liked from it- she wasn’t all kvetching, no appreciation, after all.

In all honesty, he loved the wild tangential spin she loved. He felt some remorse about how deeply he had rummaged in her brain. She still was, in a sense, her own. Just now permanently entangled in his web. Like a rat in a glue trap, but only she didn’t grasp how sticky the glue was…. She was fully mentally tethered. He’d have to be more careful, he didn’t want to lose her, or push these experiences too deep. Losing this spark of ingenuity and tired vivaciousness would be a sin worse than anything else.

He swallowed another sip of his Fanta.

It seemed a bit shaken, but he swept those away. Kept them as salacious afterthought. Bonded the memories from today that were pleasant to her already aching neurotransmitters. Amped up her hormones a tad bit.

Anyone around her, even a stupid human could probably hear her mind now. It was both very intrigued by the subject matter of the book but also so desperately needy for her Doctor. He could feel her aching cunt and body responding from here. Anybody with a pulse could probably get her drift.

He'd probably, if anyone was sensitive enough, have to start beating them off with a stick!

That could be fun, lure her further. Let her know that she was only safe with him…

He ran the possibilities and scanned the bar, seeing if he could play any games.

Sadly not.

He decided against that for the moment.

Especially since something told him that she’d have precious little trouble fighting for herself. Unless he purposefully put her mind in a state of freeze, he doubted that a pub brawl based on her appearance would faze her. She, like most human girls, had been numbed to that sort of violence.

She’d probably have to come in and save him, by the looks of a few of the other patrons here…

He dissolved that idea. He couldn’t risk breaking his promise to her and regenerating on the spot if she was frozen, meant to witness. His superior genetics and all that may come with was no match for a gone-to-seed ex-rugby player nor someone who clearly worked security. As he finished his assessment of the crowd in the pub.

His mind games would have to play out in other ways still…

Just adjust the plans that he had. And take in the information Missy had pinged him.

The illusion of free will still reflected true, right?

His old pal, Plato did some allegory with a cave…sadly he wasn’t paying attention when the man was speaking. Missed the point, invented a self-lubricating spatula for flapjacks.

Oops.

He’d never say he was depriving her of that outright, no too controversial. Too salacious. Guidance, yes. A dual corruption arc? Definitely.

Daddy knows best, rung through his skull. An old line he told Kate about the poison to kill the Zygons…

Paternalistic? Yes.

How could he not be? A human is so young and weak compared to most species out there. Let alone him and his!

After all, he was her teacher. Her educator.

These thoughts, mixed with how strong she was fantasizing about fucking him, and her natural allure…he was shocked that he wasn’t bursting through his trousers, exposing himself to all to see.

He'd fuck her tonight. Not only did she clearly need it, but if he didn’t give in, he would probably act out.

He had fully surrendered himself to current path he was on. Yes.

He’d not destroy her entirely. Take away what enchanted him to her. That would be a sin graver than killing her outright. She had goals and dreams. They had discussed at such at length. He’d let her have those. So long as she’d never stray from his clingy side.

He half-wished he could summon a past version of himself, or perhaps a future without risking too much. Just to confer and pass back ideas.

All he had was Missy.

Or to sneak off and search for the Rani.

And they’d destroy him with zealous help.

No! He was alone in this path. Only solace was Missy and her enjoyment of his fawn and petty need to be good and please reform for her release. He walked his path utterly alone.

The evening wound itself up. The Doctor had to pounce. To claim what little of his fawn lay left unclaimed. Ruin her forever. Claim her indefinitely…

He paid their bill and ventured into the night.

A pep laid in his step, his cock still semi-stiff. He’d destroy her to rebuild her.

Teacher’s Pet.

He’d have his fun next term. Make her into a professor’s aide. Push her servile nature to him into a possibly public place. Show her off, perhaps even.

But for now? He was about ready to explode. His balls ached, and his hearts were full.

All in the name of love, right?

Or obsession…

Either way, still to have someone as alluring with such a firm form like (insert a description of your body, reader…) and a mind as hard in her ideals, but so easy to toy with?

Ecstasy…

Teacher's Pet part 3

Synopsis: The Doctor struggles with morality. The student is struggling. Both are tearing themselves up.

A/n: I'm sorry for the bit of pain. The next one should be a bit more pain, but it will get better soon. Also. These things are fun to bang out. Especially when you listen to dramatic early 2000s nu metal. Thank you all. Your response to this mean the world to me.

Utterly ashamed and indecent, the Doctor remarked to himself once (y/n) fled the office. He felt utterly indecent. Ashamed. He was shocked that even he could hold such an array of thoughts. Not that he didn’t have similar thoughts before. He had been married before. To multiple people, multiple times. He was the reason why the Virgin Queen wasn’t really a Virgin.

But to a student? No, he couldn’t. Even though this was a charade, he still felt bound to at least some of the rules a professor should follow…

And the scenarios his mind was running? Much more akin to something that his dear best enemy, locked in her Vault would have.

He kicked her out for her own good. Her obvious tone shift and body language change had clued him in to the fact that she picked up on it. The girl was very good at making connections, it seemed. Maybe not getting them in a correct or orderly manner. But she was no idiot. Despite what her brain, past educators, and experts had probably told her.

He knew all about various so-called learning disabilities and some honestly just seemed like evolutionary differences to give the species different roles throughout the tribes and flocks.

Once, before Rose. Before he swore to himself that he would run solo forevermore. He held the idea, the hypothesis: to take a random person from a random planet. Mold their life and bend it to his will. Make a perfect companion. One noble enough to save the day, but not stupid and caring enough to get themselves killed in an act of bravery. Like so many if his past ones.

He shuddered, thanking Rose in Pete’s world for saving him from himself…

But this one? He felt oddly returned to this idea. A perfect companion. This time shaped by her own insecurities. Not preconditions he would control. He admitted he was lonely.

Nardole and Missy didn’t really count.

He stopped himself there. Maybe Missy was rubbing off on him. Getting him to pry back into those darker, more primal urges.

He needed a breath of fresh air. A trip off-planet.

Just Missy’s influence, he shook himself as he meandered down to the mess hall to get a bit of scran before a trip to somewhere. Nothing more, nothing less. Relapse in it's most basic indulgences.

He found himself at the Eye of Orion. Just exactly what the Doctor ordered! Peace and solace. Stop what was shaking him up at the source.

Too bad that he was being plagued by thoughts of (y/n).

She was possessing him.

Clever, nervous, just a hint of something else. She came to the meeting with some sparkly gunk crusted to her eye corners and the residuals of make up being slapped on in layers.

The way she quickly diverted the topic when her work was mentioned slightly irked him. She didn’t elaborate, just a missed appointment and a shocked tone.

What did she do?

Another mystery girl to lure him out of his shell. The universe, in all of its infinite wisdom, loved tossing mystery women at him.

They always frustrated him to arousal. A stupid trait he felt he got from his days crushing over Missy when they were young lads. Back when he shielded everyone from the Drums until they drove him to madness and self-corruption.

Corruption…

That stupid past plot of his past self echoed again. It might be fun. She might be fairly easy to tip into it on her own accord.

He decided against it. Ultimately.

Missy’s influence. Damn it!

He leaned back on the patch of grass he was on. Trying to clear his mind. She was just another daft ape. Just a student for him to inspire to help along the way.

But her grins and demeanor wouldn’t leave him.

Her hunched over form, and the clanging of her jewelry and the way she used her hands to speak…

Was doing something to him. Awakening something he tried to kill.

He relaxed for a while more before returning. Nardole, of course, was exasperated that he went away. Especially without telling him beforehand…

He hadn’t felt this frantic since he was locked in the Confession Dial.

Back in his office, he had a queue of students waiting for Office Hours. Mainly droll questions about the mid-term project. (Mandatory by the university.) The other students sat in her seat, where she had spilled crumbs on. He engaged them. And got a kick out of them and their findings and research. There were a good batch of students in his classes this term.

The Doctor found delight in them and the thoughts of (y/n) went to back-burner.

Then Tuesday came. One of the two days the class (y/n) was in was.

He groaned.

Hopefully today whatever was abnormal faded. Maybe she’d not come. Some sort of survival instinct will have kicked in…

Of course. He wasn’t so lucky. He remembered her scribbled maths equations about her monetary investment in university. He doubted that she’d go and waste the nearly eighty pounds a singular class was costing her. It seemed out of character.

He, in bad faith, wished her ill enough to take off.

Too bad the universe rarely responded well to bargaining.

She slunk in in between the masses of people. As if to go incognito, to not draw his attention. She removed her notebook and got a pen out and slouched forward. He scanned the room as he opened up with his exciting build-upon on Thursday’s lecture. A poem from Robert Burns that tangentially related to the themes. She wasn’t making eye contact, instead she was chewing on the chain of one of her many necklaces. This particular one was the chain that held a pendant with a historical symbol. She was scribbling furiously. Her eyes squinted and she seemed to be muttering a tad bit under her breath. He didn’t want to admit how much he wanted to pry in. To hear. To understand. To respond. To feel.

“And fare thee weel, my only luve! And fare thee weel awhile! And I will come again, my luve, Though it were ten thousand mile.” He finished and then went on with a remark.

“Does the universe love us? Does it owe us?And if it does, why?” He opened up to the floor to discussion and debate.

Many responded, except for (y/n), who obviously was holding her tongue and trying to not make eye contact with anyone. Just focused in on writing and listening.

He could carve out a response from her.

“Miss (y/n’s surname)? What do you think, I think Braelynne made a fantastic point. Come, join us.”

(Y/n) spat out the chain and straightened up her posture. She had pen ink on her chin and looked, quite frankly like she’d leak tears.

She sniffled before speaking, a crack in her voice. “I think it’d be narcissistic to assume that the universe owes us anything. But does it love us? Maybe. It loves itself through us. Like, like, like, when we do tasks like help an elderly neighbor carry their groceries in. Or give a few coins to a homeless person. It’s the universe loving itself. Maybe it’s like when you drink something probiotic. To the germs in your gut…aren’t you the entire universe? I don’t know. I do think that thinking you, out of all creation, prioritizing yourself in the center of it….uhhh. Red flag!” She flustered, grabbing her pen and resuming the furious scratching she was making.

That gave the Doctor a world of insight to her brain, inner workings. Maybe she felt like she was owed something but held some remorse over these thoughts. It seemed conflicting in her punctuation and how hard she seemed to force the words out. Wise, beyond wise, but also leaving herself a tad bit shortsighted and a decided lack of grace.

Obviously she didn’t want to speak. Obviously she had plenty to occupy her mind with at that moment.

So he pursued via others, “Is it narcissistic to expect something when, by (y/n)’s standards, we’re bacteria and microbes in a greater gut system?”

Someone replied that it was reductive and put humans on the same levels as non-sentient life. That they had greater purposes. That the microbes’ lives were less vital than a human life. (Y/n) scrunched her nose in disgust at such a statement. Internal dissent.

Ah, he thought, very good. A measure of her morals.

He built on that. He opened up the topic, getting more opinions from the other student. Hoping she’d speak up…

He noticed (y/n) shoving her things into her bag and sniffling again. Maybe he did get what he earlier asked the universe for. Maybe she was sick. Maybe.

Ironic.

She made a beeline for the door, “Sorry. I have…an emergency.” She turned to him at the door. “I’ll get the notes from someone.” She promised. Her chest was beginning to visibly heave.

He nodded and she shot out of the room like a horse out of a gate.

Reblog to give your followers some cheesy garlic bread