Hi Hello. So, Consider G1 Rumble Being A Humanfucker. Most Of The Alien's Out In The Galaxy Are The Size

Hi hello. So, consider G1 Rumble being a humanfucker. Most of the alien's out in the galaxy are the size of the average transformer or larger, and humans are one of the few species smaller than Rumble. So he absolutely wants to dive into some human pussy. He loves how soft and squishy they are, and likes grinding his spike in between thick human thighs

Recent studies suggest our galaxy's diameter to be about 100,000 light years, even without its dark matter halo. And it's still hard to get laid here. Shame.

I remember that episode where Rumble parties with humans a bit. So yeah, why not take it a bit further?

It'd be absolutely hilarious if Rumble has zero knowledge of human gender shit and has a hard time figuring out how to get those with an "organic valve". Should he get more squishy ones? No, probably doesn't work like that. Long-haired ones, maybe? No. Ones that smell better? Nah, still no. But if he gets a human with a different set of genitals, he still can find a use for their thighs.

Nice oral is served under the cut. I'm delighted.

Any chance I could get some Scavengers fun times? Spinister getting off by fingering Krok into several overloads or Misfire insisting Fulcrum sit on his face.

WAP on the WAP

Fulcrum pushes Misfire’s face away with a hand over his mouth, feeling energon flood his neck cables as he becomes increasingly flustered by the flier’s words. This, as he expected, doesn’t deter Misfire who continues to babble on even with his mouth firmly covered to Fulcrum’s dismay. The words are muffled but Fulcrum can easily guess what Misfire is spouting from his previous innuendos and lascivious offers.

“I’m not letting you anywhere near my valve!” Fulcrum snaps, keeping Misfire at arm's length.

Misfire’s retort is completely muffled but that doesn’t stop him from going on and on while bobbing his shoulders suggestively. Fulcrum sighs and removes his hand, regretting the action even as he makes it, before crossing his arms to hear Misfire out.

“What’s the hold-up? I just want to get that landing strip slick-”

Fulcrum covers Misfire’s mouth again and pinches the bridge of his nose.

“Do you just… not know subtlety?” Fulcrum huffs.

Misfire pulls off with a laugh, pushing Fulcrum’s arm away easily, “Subtlety and I don’t get along… So, why not? Just don’t wanna?”

Scoffing, Fulcrum shakes his head, “I’m just not going to let that mouth get anywhere near this valve.” Fulcrum points down between his legs.

Propping his arm on Fulcrum’s shoulder, Misfire grins, “Aww, I grossed you out that much?”

“No…” Fulcrum flushes, “I just… don’t like to do that sort of thing.”

MIsfire’s wings droop slightly, “Ah, huh, never met anyone who didn’t like having their valve licked clean but I guess someone out there wasn’t going to be down with that sort of thing.”

Rubbing his helm awkwardly, Fulcrum glances away, “Uh, well… I just don’t like doing that sort of thing for other people and that’s why you’re offering, right? You want me to…”

“What?” Misfire holds his hands out as if to brush the words away, shaking his head, “No, no, I… I like doing it for other mechs, especially if they’re as handsome as you.” Tapping his cheek, Misfire turns a bit bashful which is a rare enough sight to pull back Fulcrum’s attention fully, “I, um, maybe like it a bit too much.”

A strange feeling goes down Fulcrum’s spinal strut, “Oh, uh…”

Misfire’s optics go wide, flaring softly as he presses his hands together, pleading his spark out.

Fulcrum shuts his optics and sighs, “You really aren’t asking that I return the favor?”

“I swear! I just want to get my face messy in those soft folds of yours and make you drip lubricant,” Misfire grins cheekily, chuckling at Fulcrum’s groan.

“Fine!” Fulcrum snags Misfire and starts dragging him off to the nearest berth. “If it’ll get you to finally shut up!”

They get to a room on the W.A.P. with Misfire eagerly following Fulcrum like a loyal dog, giggling excitedly as Fulcrum pushes him onto the berth.

Misfire flares his hand dramatically over his mouth, “Your seat, sir.”

While glaring at the flier, Fulcrum hefts himself onto the berth to sit on Misfire’s chest and pops his panels open much to Misfire’s delight.

“Tha’s a tasty looking-”

Fulcrum grabs Misfire’s helm and shoves his face into his valve, “Just shut up and get to work already.”

Misfire couldn’t look happier with a face full of valve as he grabs Fulrum’s thighs to pull him firmly against his mouth, nuzzling in to lick Fulcrum’s anterior node slowly with his wet glossa swirling around the circumference. It’s embarrassing to Fulcrum how quickly he gets wet just watching Misfire bury himself into Fulcrum’s valve and then he feels Misfire swirl his tongue and he has to grip both of his hands over his mouth to keep himself from making any sound. As lubricant meets his lips, Misfire is none the wiser, lapping away at Fulcrum’s valve lips, his glossa lighting up node clusters with slow, purposeful strokes as he takes his time to enjoy the feeling. He groans into Fulcrum’s valve which earns him a small gush of lubricant that he licks up greedily before moving to suck gently on Fulcrum’s anterior node. His hands grip Fulcrum’s thighs more firmly as he feels him begin to twitch, not letting Fulcrum escape the onslaught of his glossa.

The effect that this is having on Misfire is obvious almost immediately, his spike fully pressurizing as he slips the tip of his glossa into Fulcrum’s entrance, feeling the calipers there starting to clench. He circles the entrance, moaning at the crackling charge that tickles his glossa as he presses it to the soft mesh there dotted with sporadic node clusters and he can feel his spike throb. Fulcrum grabs his spike and squeezes which only urges Misfire on, unable to think as well with Fulcrum’s hand pumping him while he licks mindlessly against Fulcrum’s anterior node. Trying his best to not just overload over Fulcrum’s hand, he moves his glossa back to Fulcrum’s tasty entrance, releasing a buzz of charge from his intake into Fulcrum’s valve, getting him to stiffen up with a shout that has Misfire’s spark melting.

Fulcrum holds onto Misfire for dear life, his digits digging into the flier’s shoulders as he feels Misfire lazily frag him with an eager glossa that hungrily seeks out his nodes only to graze them teasingly. Suddenly, he’s on his back but he doesn’t care with Misfire softly sucking on his anterior node as he nudges it with glossa, keeping a steady flow of charge coursing through his valve that has him completely incoherent. Then, Misfire slides a digit into his entrance and strokes his spike while he keeps that sinful mouth on Fulcrum’s node, easily tipping Fulcrum into overload who grabs Misfire’s helm, pressing Misfire hard against his valve. He humps Misfire’s face, riding out his overload panting and moaning with abandon.

Once spent, Fulcrum lays back with his vents on full blast and immediately regrets looking down where he finds Misfire licking his lips, his face completely drenched in lubricant.

“Good, huh?”

Fulcrum stiffens up and clears his intake, “It was alright. I guess…”

Misfire pushes up a bit and Fulcrum blushes at the sight of Misfire’s still-twitching spike covered in transfluid above a quickly forming puddle, “Well, I certainly had a good time.”

“I… I see…”

Ducking down to kiss Fulcrum’s valve, “Primus, this thing is great.”

Fulcrum pushes at Misfire’s forehelm only to be met with laughter, “Don’t talk about it like that!”

“Oh? Should I shut myself up again?” Misfire smirks.

Freezing, Fulcrum thinks it over but not for as long as he’d have liked to, and nods, yelping softly when Misfire buries himself back into Fulcrum’s valve.

I really like the headcanon (which I didn't come up with myself, picked it up in some fic) that TFP Knock Out worked in the beauty industry, doing buffing and shit. And after the war broke out, he reclassified himself as a doctor, took five-day courses, and started performing medical stuff. He's basically a hairdresser doing surgery.

My loved one's made me start watching "Stargate: Universe" with him. We're both unfamiliar with the rest of the franchise, just here for Robert Carlyle's acting. What can I say?

Between two stories about going to god knows where on an old mysterious ship full of surprizes, they definitely had more fun on the Lost Light. At least they had a bar.

Also, Nicolas Rush's character makes me lament (a bit) Perceptor in MTMTE being stripped of his "still waters run deep" personality and made into just an aloof nerd. I really love complex, morally and ethically ambiguous scientists who don't fall into the "mad scientist" archetype. Which I also love, if done tastefully and not stormed with some boring clichés like evil gloating and world dominance for the sake of world dominance, that sucks.

But that's why I've appreciated the twist with Brainstorm. He had a good point.

(Also, the Rush vs. Young subplot is slowly growing on me. Authors should never be shy of giving their characters some chemistry though rivalry, where deeper lies the understanding, the respect. It can be worth it.)

What they say: "Scarlett brings Scarlett into the [Elita] role."

What I hear: "People have every right to hate celebs trying voice acting and deny them even a chance to prove they're worth something. Lazy ass motherfuckers aren't even trying to pretend they study a character and put even a iota of work to explore how to portray them without pushing their famous persona EVERYWHERE. They shouldn't be encouraged to safely try something new while they don't have to worry about being trapped in poverty and losing their income. We don't expect our paid actors to, ya know, act. Praise poor-spirited, mediocre shit!" As god is my witness, I can't wait to see the movie, but shit they say in promo is kinda sad.

"Pits of Kaon" was actually an afterparty for those who paid extra shanix to see gladiators delivering some other sort of circenses after tearing each others' guts out. For instance, them being restrained, edged, and milked. Those who made a good show on the arena got their bonds loosened enough to allow them to spike a false valve by themselves. And those whose performance sucked (even if they won) got just restrained and forced to watch.

Every known gladiator went through it, at least once. The celibacy requirement in most gladiator's contracts was no joke. Megatron? Oh, was an absolute crowd-pleaser. Why he later turned to revolutionary ideas and terror? Motherfuckers banned "Pits of Kaon".