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Apparently I badly want to go on my “stop making fun of plague doctors, they were ahead of their time and doing the best they could with the primitive equipment they had available” rant.

I love seeing a meme and being like oh, tumblrs going to love this one

I love a character raised to be a weapon as much as the next guy. But what really gets me is a character raised to be a shield. Who can’t fathom being needed—or even being wanted— beyond keeping others safe. Who believe they are alive only to insure someone doesn’t die. no matter the cost. Characters who self-sacrifice not because they think they deserve it, but because no one else does deserve it, and it’s their job to protect.

Characters who’ve been told that’s why your important. Your worth something because this other person/ thing is important, and you are here solely to keep them safe.

Bonus points if it’s not a legitimate job they’ve been given. Maybe at one point it was, but now that they are free from it, they haven’t given up that mentality. No one is forcing or asking them to do this, but they need to. They need to in order to be deserving.

Wait, beneath the sea floor?

OUGHGH??

OIUOHGHHVOIH!!!!!

how’s everyone doin tonight i just broke tumblr

Recycled tumblr humor

rating the white star's battles based on how embarrassing they were for him personally

because he deserves it.

his first appearance in the mogoru empire: 1/10 — by far his least embarrassing battle. he manages to come off as extremely powerful and menacing final boss. cryptic remarks about choi han and cale's situation make him look mysterious. our heroes put their everything into this battle and just barely manage to come out of it alive. cale faints for weeks afterward.

battle at the castle of light: 7/10 — starts out pretty well for him when he traps our heroes in the castle, but goes downhill from there. he just gets tricked so easily. cale and co. have a blast pretending to be weak to throw him off, ambushing him, and then chasing him off with rocks. embarrassingly, all of this is facilitated by the fact that the white star does not, in fact, know all the entrances to his home village.

battle at the north: 6/10 — the white star just keeps getting scammed. when will he learn? gets some points for his excellent showing against witira and the whale king. loses all of them because archie was allowed to talk.

battle at the dubori territory: 4/10 — the white star actually had a pretty good showing here. managed to trip cale with his illusionist. dealt pretty well with choi han and eruhaben, even if they managed to get out of danger. did some heavy damage to the territory itself. he did lose an arm (both metaphorical and physical one), so there's that.

battle of the underground city: 5/10 — immediately realizes the city is fake and that the whole thing is a trap, thus disrupting cale's plans. however, any points he might have gotten are immediately made void by the fact that he starts constructing an elaborate history between cale and himself to justify his previous losses. his ego can't take it anymore. he's retreating to the AU land.

the battle at the stan territory: 6/10 — this should have been a win for him. he's prepared for everything. the battle is going on at four fronts, and cale henituse can't react in time. unfortunately for him, his plans are shit and cale can, in fact, react in time. actually, he can react so fast that he manages to mitigate the situation in all four battles and reinforce the stan territory. the white star is, once again, forced to flee, but not before informing everyone around about his weird AU land belief, thus making cale's reputation soar. embarrassing.

the battle to steal cale's body: 7/10 — the white star is forced to contend with alberu, who brought a gun to a knife fight. it does not go well for him. also, they really shouldn't have underestimated mary.

the battle at puzzle city: 20/10 — there are literally no good points here. his disguise is seen through pretty easily. he gets trapped by the mana disturbance tools. cale hits him with a mental attack so devastating that his ego can't take it, and he gets himself sealed. the bitch-slap happens, and it's glorious. at least he gets sealed into a golden plaque, so at least he gets some dignity there.

the battle in the sealed temple: 10/10 — he gets killed by a stick. the only thing mitigating the embarrassment factor here is that cale had to stab himself in the heart first, and that adds a certain oomph the white star himself has never been able to accomplish.

+ special mention

the battle in the wrath test: 15/10 — he gets beaten by a rock. like. it's literally a pebble. sure, it's a magical pebble, but still. a pebble.

WHAT IS THE FUCKING POINT

Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint: Chapter 551:

"Even if Kim Dokja came back to us alive through the story we have crafted, do you truly believe that he will be the real Kim Dokja?"

The remaining one percent of Kim Dokja they couldn't remember.

That Kim Dokja none of them could remember, where would he be left behind in this universe, then?

+++

Oh my god I can finally talk about this theory (iykyk)

Let's say HSY and KimCo managed to grab every fragment of Kim Dokja's stories that they could possibly have access to from the people who knew him.

But there's one huge hole here: No one knew pre-scenarios Kim Dokja at all. Ages 15-mid 20's Kim Dokja is a huge missing piece.

He had no friends. He refused to talk about himself when he visited his mother in prison. Arguably, Han Sooyoung is the one who knew him the most ages 15 to before he got hired at Minosoft. But even then she only got to know what he'd share through DM's at that age.

Anyone who knew him at this age died early on in ORV. His relatives who "took care of him" had an offscreen death (confirmed by lee Sookyoung). His high school bullies were killed too.

But the weirder part is.

Kim Dokja doesn't remember this part of himself either.

There are multiple instances in the novel where he makes a point to express surprise and confusion over his lost memories specifically around this age range.

There's a Kim Dokja none of them remember in the universe, and it's a pretty dang significant part of him.

Tldr; If a Kim Dokja came back by us reading ORV, I don't think he would be a 100% KDJ at all. YJK and HSY knew this. They tried anyways.

Every year I find myself defending the poor folks at the Crazy Bonez Halloween brand from all the internet haters who genuinely think they're dumb enough to "accidentally" make wrong skeletons. Maybe this kills the fun of the hyperbolic outrage for some, but it's really not the result of faceless clueless capitalism; most of the inaccurate Halloween skeletons, from the more outrageous Bone Octopuses to the subtler "birds with bone feathers" and "dogs with bone ears" are completely conscious artistic choices by one small team. I've talked to some of them! The idea that someone made a Bone Octopus Halloween Decoration out of actual ignorance is such a bizarre assumption to make, though. Yes, almost all adults do in fact know that cat skulls wouldn't have ears on them, and all adults definitely know that pumpkins don't have bones.

Many that you actually see on the market, however, are bootlegs or imitations of their designs. The real thing will usually say Crazy Bonez or Seasons on it, though Spirit Halloween is also a legit partner and gets some exclusive models every year. There are two new 2023 releases I'm super excited to review. Some of you already know what they are!

Pour one out for my town’s first stone carvers circa 1648, who didn't know what the fuck a griffin was, but did their best when reproducing this dude's coat of arms with only his silverware as a guide.

I think it's funny that in French the word for "unicorn" is "licorne" because:

The word "unicorne" was first reanalyzed as "une icorne"

The definite article was then added, making it "l'icorne"

The new definite form was reanalyzed once again, resulting in "une licorne"

No, Google Docs, there is a distinct difference between "cussing" and "cursing."

today i put pizza in a bowl again

I was telling my dad about that last week and he defended your choice but only if there’s no plates left

Please tell me it’s not in strips again I’ll cry

reading some cale quotes for fic purposes and i can't believe how much you can forget when you blitz through 1000+ chapters in less than two months.

like, cale curses so much. so much. i guess i didn't really internalize it since it was spread out over the whole novel, but he has such a dirty mouth and literally every time he mentions his enemies, he's cursing up a storm.

"i don't care if he's lived a thousand years or not, that shithead is a fucking bastard from now on." cale henituse, on the greatest threat of the whole part one of the novel. he's so eloquent.

i forgot how snarky his internal voice is. actually, maybe not forgot. just, kind of got used to it? until i stopped registering the absolutely sick burns he keeps dishing out on the regular.

it takes him until chapter 270 to realize that he should have just let choi han beat him up. that seems like a lot, but we've still barely reached the eastern continent. adin is still alive. cale doesn't even know who the white star is. the trouble hasn't even started.

also, at one point he actually admits to being raon, on and hong's parent??? out loud??? i can't believe i missed that, the whole dodori thing distracted me.

"raon. I’m someone who cannot forget. don't be like me." i didn't actually forget this one, but it feels like a gut punch every time i read it again.

Can we talk about how in zombie shows/movies/books they always find a veterinarian and not a surgeon? Are veterinarians deemed more likely to survive the apocalypse?

Can we talk about how in zombie shows/movies/books they always find a veterinarian and not a surgeon? Are veterinarians deemed more likely to survive the apocalypse?

whatever man. check this out 👇🏽

trying to decide if i'd rather be a tortoise or a turtle. on the one hand I prefer dry land, on the other hand turtles can breathe out of their cloacae so. it's tricky

the worst part of reading tcf and not actually knowing korean is that every time i read the sentence 'cale speaks informally' i know there is a cultural context there that i don't understand and i'm kind of desperate to know just how rude cale is, on the regular.