Bad Ideas Make The Best Memories.

“Bad ideas make the best memories.”

— Alle Farben

10.

Today marks a year since I met Soregina for the first time. It feels like a lifetime ago. Such a cliché thing to say, but... In a way, I suppose one year for me has always been a lifetime. Two or three, sometimes.

She fell into my life, and from that day onwards, my breaths came a little easier. A whirlwind of charm and joy, with determination to match. I was given a purpose, both literally and figuratively... Something to fight for that seemed worth the struggle. Someone to care about who wouldn't turn around and forget about me when I least expected it. Someone... whom I might be able to help, rather than hurt. She brought out the best in me and made me want to be even better.

And now... Although things didn't quite turn out the way I intended... I get to have her close by; get to see her smile and laugh and roll her eyes and call me rum. Get to be by her side and see her grow, get to take part in her thought processes and help her sort them out. And I get to feel as though sometimes, I might actually be a speck of light who guides her, rather than complete darkness who swallows her whole.

As long as I have her, there is something here for me. In London, in England, in Europe... In life.

Soregina, il mio cuore extra; sorellina, la regina stravagante delle strade. <3

9.

Lately, consciousness has been... slippery. And not just in the sense that I'm sleeping an ungodly amount of hours each day (yesterday I slept, or hovered in the limbo between wake and sleep, for a total of nineteen hours). Trying to stay tethered ironically seems to make more of my past selves eager to surface, and I can't always hold them back. ...I don't know if doing so is always right, either. Mostly, it's happening when I'm alone, or around Sahrami. But sometimes... it happens with Soregina, and that... that worries me.

When I told Sahrami, he gave me a couple of summoning tickets. He can tether me, so... If I ever feel like I'm not in control, and losing it would be risky, I can call him to me. It does make me feel a bit calmer. Even just reaching into my pocket and feeling the tickets there is... comforting.

hullo mr woods!!!!!!! do you live in the wooods ???? i love the woods!!!!!!!!!! do you have a favourite plant :OO do you throw balls????? :OOOOO

Hello! Yes, I do in fact live in the woods.

There are too many plants around here to choose only one as my favourite, really. Wouldn't be fair to the rest of 'em if I only chose one, would it? As for balls, I can't say I throw them very often. I'm more of a stick kinda guy.

Say, you have a fairly complicated name. Must be tricky to say it, yeah? Do you have any other names we could use instead? :)

@chaosofshadow

deeply obsessed with this

I always try to confuse people about my life, but I'm confused too.