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17 posts
Dksfml - Hit Hit Hit Sound - Tumblr Blog
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⸻𝐈𝐍 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐒
a-n ! this is mostly for tracking and tag list purposes. these will all take a while because they're all on the longer side and are subject to change!! + i'm a slow writer and often very busy. but it's still fun to show you guys what i'm working on :) taglists for all of these are open!
⸻ CASHMERE COLOGNE. pjs
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PAIRING: bodyguard!jay x reader
GENRE: ⚠︎ smut. mdni. angst, fluff, bodyguard!au, (escaping an) arranged marriage!au
SYNOPSIS: falling for his client is definitely not part of jay's job requirements. quite the opposite actually. especially when said client is soon to be married off to super rich, super talented, super hot park sunghoon.
STATUS: writing
WORDCOUNT: currently 5k, total est. around 30k
warnings + more wips under the cut
WARNINGS: multiple smut scenes, self-doubt, reader is an artist, she’s also shameless, voyeurism, exhibitionism, masturbation (f), spit, things happen in a car, reckless driving, public sex, use of ma’am, edging, orgasm denial, protected and unprotected sex, snowballing ...more to be added
⸻ TOO GOOD TO PUT A PRICE ON IT. yjw, psh
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PAIRING: stepbro!sunghoon x reader x camboy!jungwon
GENRE: ⚠︎ smut. mdni. roomate!au
SYNOPSIS: you would be crazy to turn down free rent in exchange of getting fucked daily by the guy you've been pining after for months, but your step brother happens to want something in return too.
STATUS: outlined
WORDCOUNT: around 10k
WARNINGS: stepcest, live-streamed sex, threesome, yes reader fucks sungwon for rent bitch i would too! ...more to be added
⸻PUSSY JACKPOT! pjs + rest of hyungline
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PAIRING: bf's best friend!jay x reader, bf!jake x reader, stepbrothers!sunghoon and heeseung x reader. jay focused.
GENRE: ⚠︎ smut. mdni.
SYNOPSIS: you spend an extravagant night with jake and his friends at a casino to celebrate his latest promotion. it takes a wild turn when your sweet boyfriend decides to go all in and bet on your even sweeter pussy, knowing how all of his friends, even your stepbrothers, have been dying for a taste. no matter who wins though, you know it's gonna be you hitting the jackpot.
STATUS: outlining
WORDCOUNT: tbd
WARNINGS: infidelity, semi-public sex, stepcest, rest of hyungline get to watch ...more to be added
⸻ BUCKLE BUNNY RODEO. pjs
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PAIRING: pro bull rider!jay x bartender!reader
GENRE: ⚠︎ smut. mdni.
SYNOPSIS: the yearly PBR world finals hits your hometown again, and as always you find yourself dealing with all the losers coming to your bar to drown their sorrows in alcohol. things take an interesting turn when the winner shows up and challenges you to beat the shabby mechanical bull at the center of the overcrowded bar, promising you an even wilder ride upstairs if you're willing to take his offer.
STATUS: outlining
WORDCOUNT: tbd
WARNINGS: alcohol consumption, body shots, temperature play, facesitting, spit, cowboy jay has chest hair argue with the wall!! ...more to be added
↳ PART TWO. sjy, lhs
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SYNOPSIS: it's been a year, and jay's fellow pro bull riders want a ride too, after hearing so much about you from their dearest friend. and who are you to refuse them, when they're talking so sweet and dirty?
WARNINGS: heejake take turns, wet humping, like very wet, thigh fucking, tit fucking, oral (m. rec) ...more to be added
⸻ LAST TRAIN TO LONDON. pjs
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PAIRING: immortal!jay x mortal!reader
GENRE: angst w an hopeful ending, fluff, ⚠︎ smut, soulmate!au, reincarnation!au
SYNOPSIS: in some lives you're a painter, in others you're a musician, a writer. in some you get to grow old, maybe away from jay, maybe right beside him. in some you get to love him until your last breath, even when you're young and stupid. you're all over the world, all over time and all over jay's heart, for he lives and breathes to love you in every lifetime of yours, even if you don't remember. he always looks for you yet it's always fate bringing you back to him, this time it's by making sure you don't miss the last train to london.
STATUS: outlining
WORDCOUNT: tbd
WARNINGS: tbd
⸻ EACH TIME YOU FALL IN LOVE. psh
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PAIRING: sunghoon x reader ( + jay )
GENRE: angst, very minimal fluff, ⚠︎ smut,
SYNOPSIS: the sun shines bright even in the face of death, your most beloved husband cold in his casket despite the warmth of the weather, and sunghoon wishes circumstances were different.
or, you and sunghoon ponder on what could have been.
STATUS: outlined
WORDCOUNT: tbd
WARNINGS: old people😞, multiple character deaths ...more to be added
⸻𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒
⸻ MOTION PICTURE SOUNDTRACK. sjy
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PAIRING: co-star!jake x movie star!reader
GENRE: angst, eventual fluff and ⚠︎ smut, fake dating, rivals to lovers.
SYNOPSIS: jake has to be the most infuriating, cocky, stuck up actor you've had the displeasure to work with so far. and you wish you'd just rejected your role when your pr teams have the fantastic idea to push the limits on those... relationship rumors about you and your horrible coworker that have spread like wildfire everywhere.
STATUS: outlining
WORDCOUNT: total est. 60k
WARNINGS: tbd
⸻ A LITTLE DEATH. yjw
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PAIRING: trained assassin!jungwon x trained assassin!reader
GENRE: ⚠︎ smut, mdni. angst, rivals to lovers!au, rival families!au, found family trope
SYNOPSIS: your time at the academy is up and the choice of the companion for your graduation mission is ripped away from your hands without a notice, gifting (cursing) you instead with three less than ideal ones. or, jungwon feels a little more human every time your touch lingers on his skin
STATUS: writing
WORDCOUNT: current 11k, total est probably some shit like 150k i'm sick
WARNINGS: multiple smut scenes, character death, morally grey characterization, childhood trauma, dysfunctional families ...more to be added
⸻ ENHYPEN AS SEASONS. hyungline + sunwon ↳ where i assign the members to a season and make fics out of it ! all of these contain smut but also tooth rotting levels of fluff jsjejdje i'm sorry this isn't me usually!! what happened!!!
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• SUNGHOON AS WINTER / hockey player!sunghoon
↳ your younger brother brings you along on a snowy new year's eve trip to the mountains with his hockey teammates in hopes of finally getting you and sunghoon to get along.
• JAKE AS SPRING / florist!jake
↳ jake feels it's his duty to smooth out that frown on your face when you first meet him, as the self proclaimed town-happy-pill. he loves his job like nothing else, driving around in his flower delivery truck right along with layla, making everyone's days better. while you can't stand how bright he is all the time, what the hell is his deal anyway?
• HEESEUNG AS SUMMER / beachside barista!heeseung
↳ bleached hair, salt water, warm sun and sand between his toes. waves crashing, the buzz of alcohol and muffled thumping of music, heeseung loves summer every time all the same. this year you just happen to make it so much better, and even when he knows you're only there for this vacation, he hopes you can stay and warm him up for the colder seasons too.
• JAY AS FALL / ex!jay
↳ your friends convince you to try your local coffee shop's new blind date experience, months after your very first heartbreak. you don't expect your ex to be your match. or, mending a relationship turns out to be a lot more trouble than resolving murder mysteries.
! bonuses
• SUNOO AS SPRING BREAK / ex childhood bff!sunoo
↳ truthfully, leaving for a different college after promising you'd go to the same one in hopes of quenching his feelings from blossoming further wasn't sunoo's best move. or, sunoo is itching to finally be back home.
• JUNGWON AS CHRISTMAS / frenemy!jungwon
↳ it's no secret that you and jungwon butt heads constantly, and your friends have gotten quite annoyed by your antics. so what better way to resolve this if not assigning you two to be each other's secret santas? or, everyone is a little kinder once christmas comes around.
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Why couldn't I grow up to be a photographer
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baekhyun undressing himself on master key
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ENHYPEN <ROMANCE : UNTOLD> Behind Photo (film ver.)
𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒚 𝒋𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒘𝒐𝒏 𝒑𝒐𝒓𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒓𝒖𝒍𝒚 𝒊𝒎𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒗𝒆.𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒅𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚 𝒐𝒇 𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒔𝒐 𝒄𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒉𝒂𝒔.
𝑨𝑪𝑻𝑶𝑹 𝒀𝑨𝑵𝑮 𝑱𝑼𝑵𝑮𝑾𝑶𝑵 𝒀𝑨'𝑳𝑳 ♡
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𝑳𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓 𝒐𝒇 4𝒕𝒉 𝑮𝒆𝒏 𝑯𝒐𝒕 𝑰𝒄𝒐𝒏 ,𝒀𝒂𝒏𝒈 𝑱𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒘𝒐𝒏 #정원 ♡
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#엔하이픈 #ENHYPEN
🔮𝒑𝒍𝒔 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 & 𝒓𝒆𝒃𝒍𝒐𝒈 / 𝒅𝒐𝒏𝒕 𝒓𝒆𝒑𝒐𝒔𝒕🔮
i love jay angst so much
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⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ FADING INTO YOU ━ JAY
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contents. jay was ready to spend forever with you, but forever ended before it could even begin. tags. ANGST, no comfort, death, sadness pairing. jay x reader my note. was in an angsty mood today so i whipped this bad boy. i cried while writing it and cried twice more while editing it. enjoy !! library.
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the wedding was supposed to be in two weeks. everything was planned down to the last detail—the flowers, the venue, the vows you and jay had written for each other late at night, curled up on the couch with nothing but the soft glow of the tv to light the room. it was supposed to be the beginning of the rest of your lives, the culmination of years of love and dreams, of promises whispered in the dark.
but life has a cruel way of shattering even the most beautiful of dreams.
you had met jay when you were both just starting to figure out who you were. he was chasing a dream that seemed impossible to most, while you were grounded in the reality of everyday life. still, something about him drew you in, something in the way he looked at the world with eyes full of wonder and determination. he had this way of making you believe that anything was possible, that love was a thing you could hold in your hands and keep forever.
you had been together for years, weathering the storms of long-distance, of fame, of the inevitable changes that life throws at you. but through it all, your love only grew stronger, more unshakable. when he got down on one knee, ring in hand, tears in his eyes, you hadn’t hesitated for a second. saying yes to jay was the easiest thing you’d ever done.
those months leading up to the wedding were a blur of happiness. you’d always imagined that planning a wedding would be stressful, but with jay by your side, it was nothing short of magical. every decision felt like a step closer to forever, every moment a new memory to treasure. you’d catch him looking at you sometimes, a soft smile on his lips, and he’d say, “i can’t believe i get to marry you.” and every time, you’d feel your heart swell with a love so deep it was almost overwhelming.
you were both so ready. so sure.
the day it happened, you had just finished a fitting for your dress. it was perfect, just like you’d imagined, and you couldn’t wait for jay to see you in it. you were driving home, humming along to a song on the radio, your thoughts filled with visions of the life you were about to start. maybe that’s why you didn’t see the car running the red light, or maybe it was just fate. either way, it didn’t matter. all that mattered was that in a split second, everything changed.
jay was at the studio when he got the call. he’d been working on a new song, something he planned to surprise you with on your wedding day. he always loved surprising you, loved seeing the way your eyes lit up when he did something unexpected. but the moment he heard the tremor in the voice on the other end of the line, he knew something was wrong. he barely remembered the drive to the hospital, his mind a haze of fear and denial. this wasn’t happening. it couldn’t be happening. you were supposed to be safe. you were supposed to be coming home.
when he arrived, the look on the doctor’s face told him everything he needed to know. they said you didn’t suffer, that it was quick, that you were gone before you even knew what was happening. but that didn’t make it any easier. nothing could make this easier. nothing could change the fact that the love of his life, the woman he was supposed to marry, the woman he had dreamed of growing old with, was gone.
jay didn’t cry at first. he couldn’t. it was like his body refused to process what was happening. he just sat there, staring at the floor, while the world crumbled around him. his mind kept replaying the last time he saw you, the way you’d smiled at him, kissed him goodbye, told him you’d see him later. you had no idea that would be your last goodbye. neither did he.
the days that followed were a blur. everyone kept telling him how sorry they were, how unfair it was, how you had been too young, too full of life. they told him to take it one day at a time, that time would heal the pain, that you would want him to be happy. but none of it mattered. all he wanted was you. all he could think about was the future you’d never have, the wedding that would never happen, the life you’d planned together that was now just a memory of a dream.
he couldn’t bring himself to go home. not to the apartment you’d shared, the place where every corner held a piece of you, of the life you’d built together. so he stayed at the dorms, throwing himself into work, trying to drown out the pain with exhaustion. but no matter how hard he worked, no matter how many hours he spent in the studio, it was never enough. the grief was always there, a constant weight in his chest, a reminder of what he had lost.
the wedding day came and went. he couldn’t bring himself to cancel it, so his friends did it for him, handling everything while he sat in the room you should have been in, staring at the ring he still couldn’t take off. he spent that day alone, walking through the city, trying to find something—anything—that would make the pain go away. but there was nothing. just the endless, aching emptiness.
people told him that it would get easier, that the pain would fade with time. but as the weeks turned into months, jay realized that wasn’t true. the pain didn’t fade; he just got better at hiding it. he learned to smile when he had to, to laugh when it was expected, to keep up the facade of someone who was okay. but inside, he was broken, shattered into pieces that could never be put back together.
he visited your grave every week, bringing flowers, talking to you like you were still there, like you could still hear him. he’d tell you about his day, about the little things that happened, about how much he missed you. sometimes he’d play the song he had written for you, the one you were supposed to hear on your wedding day, the one he couldn’t bring himself to finish after you were gone. it was the only place he could let the mask slip, the only place he could be honest about how much he was hurting.
“i’m sorry,” he’d whisper, kneeling by your grave, tears streaming down his face. “i’m so sorry, y/n. i should’ve been there. i should’ve… i don’t know. done something. anything.”
but there was nothing he could have done. that was the hardest part. knowing that no matter how much he wished for it, no matter how much he begged, he could never bring you back. he could never change what happened.
one night, he found himself at the café where you used to go all the time. it was late, almost closing time, but he didn’t care. he sat at the table in the corner, the one you always liked, and ordered your favorite drink. the barista gave him a sympathetic look, like she knew who he was, knew what had happened. maybe she did. maybe everyone did. but he didn’t care.
as he sat there, staring at the empty seat across from him, the memories came flooding back. the first time he brought you here, the way you’d laughed when he spilled coffee on his shirt, the countless hours you’d spent talking, dreaming about the future. he could almost see you sitting there, smiling at him, your eyes full of love and warmth.
“i don’t know how to do this without you,” he whispered, his voice breaking. “i don’t know how to live in a world where you’re not here.”
he stayed there until they closed, until the barista gently told him it was time to go. he walked home in the rain, not caring that he was soaked through, not caring about anything. when he got back to the dorms, he went to the room that had once been yours, the room where all your things were still exactly where you’d left them. he hadn’t been able to pack them away. it felt too final, too real.
he sat down on the bed, your scent still lingering on the sheets, and for the first time in weeks, he let himself cry. not the silent tears that he’d grown used to, but the deep, gut-wrenching sobs that tore through him, leaving him gasping for air. he cried for everything he’d lost, for the future that would never be, for the love that had been ripped away from him.
“i love you,” he whispered through the tears, his voice breaking. “i love you so much, y/n. i don’t know how to stop.”
and in the quiet of that room, with nothing but the sound of his own broken heart echoing in his ears, jay finally allowed himself to grieve. he cried for hours, until there were no tears left, until he was empty, drained of everything except the pain.
the next morning, he woke up still clutching your pillow, his face stained with dried tears. the sun was shining through the curtains, but it felt wrong, like the world shouldn’t be allowed to go on without you. but it did. it always did. and so did he, somehow.
he got up, got dressed, and went through the motions of living. but nothing felt real. nothing felt like it mattered. he went back to work, back to the studio, back to the life he had before you, but it was all just a shadow of what it used to be. he was just going through the motions, pretending to be okay because that’s what everyone expected him to do.
but every night, when the world was quiet, when there was no one around to see, he’d lay in bed and think of you. he’d close his eyes and remember the way you looked at him, the way you smiled, the way you laughed. and he’d whisper your name into the darkness, hoping that somehow, somewhere, you could hear him.
“i miss you,” he’d say, his voice barely more than a breath. “i miss you so much.”
and then, with the tears wetting his pillow, he’d fall asleep, only to wake up and do it all over again.
because that was all he could do. that was all that was left.
and maybe, someday, the pain would dull, and the memories would bring more comfort than sorrow. but for now, jay was just a man who had lost the love of his life, trying to figure out how to keep going in a world that felt unbearably empty without you.
but he would keep going. for you. because you would want him to. and because he didn’t know how to stop loving you, even if it hurt to keep doing so.
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permanent taglist. @astratlantis @jongseongfile @vousty
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THE TWIST HAD ME DROPPING MY JAW TO THE FLOOR
I'm still your boy daydreaming ִֶָ☾。
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SYNOPSIS: As graduation draws to a close, Jungwon, who has quietly pined for you for years, remains daydreaming.
PAIRINGS: Whipped bff!jungwon x unaware!reader
GENRE: college!won, fluff, some angst(?)
A/N: listened to “the cutest pair” by Regina Song, but in wonnie’s pov!
Jungwon watched as you anxiously bit your fingernail, fixated on the projector while the professor droned on about the upcoming graduation details.
Amid the collective buzz of nerves and excitement, you were determined to get everything perfect for this special academic moment. Sensing his gaze, Jungwon breath hitched as you turned to glare at him, saying, ''For a summa cum laude, I'd expect you to pay attention, won." With a sigh, you leaned back in your chair, deciding to ignore your own advice and drift into distraction. Jungwon blinked away the image of you that had been stuck in his head for the past hour and straightened his back, finally focusing on the topic at hand.
For years, Jungwon poured all his energy into his studies, making academics his sole focus. In contrast, you seemed to glide effortlessly through your responsibilities, seamlessly balancing your love for baking while maintaining excellent grades. Your natural grace and effortless talent captivated him, turning his admiration into something more profound.
Being president of the student council, Jungwon frequently found himself in need of support, and you were always there— covering missed classes, updating him on quizzes, and even bringing him homemade cookies. Each time he received those sweet treats, he adoringly traced every chocolate chip, imagining you in the kitchen, preparing them just for him. Your small acts of kindness and your effortless charm only deepened his admiration, turning him almost into a fanatic.
To Jungwon, you were the epitome of support and sweetness—the kindest, most lovely person he had ever encountered. Your presence was as delightful as strawberries and as warm as chocolate, and he found himself completely captivated. Any affection you showed him made him blush furiously, a reaction you took as just part of his normal demeanor. His attempts to hold your hand, which you happily reciprocated, left him almost fainting, his heart racing with every touch and glance.
As junior year passed, both of you grew older and more mature, with Jungwon's gestures evolving from shy touches to confidently resting his arm around your shoulders. His boldness extended to occasionally inhaling the comforting scent of your hair... secretly of course. Whenever another guy approached you, Jungwon would wrap his arms around you and flash a sweet, knowing smile. “Hi, lovely. Shall we?” he’d say, his gaze casually drifting to the suitor whose hand would hang awkwardly by his side, holding sad flowers.
With a nonchalant smile, you’d cling to Jungwon, blissfully unaware of the advances you were turning down. To you, his protective presence felt natural, yet for Jungwon, every touch and moment with you was a testament to his deep affection and longing.
Jungwon was convinced that you must have feelings for him—how could you not, given the way you were with him? It seemed almost cruel to be so affectionate and loving if you didn’t truly feel the same. His eyes, always filled with love and adoration, had been that way since he was 16. Now, as he stood at the brink of adulthood, he felt an overwhelming urge to finally ask you the question he’d carried in his heart for so long.
Before the big day, you and Jungwon found yourselves huddled in a café, finalizing details and perfecting his valedictorian speech with your help. As you focused on your own tasks, writing notes to help him with, Jungwon couldn’t help but steal glances at you, his eyes blinking slowly as he tried to conceal his smile. Over the years, he had brushed off the constant teasing from classmates and possibly the whole student body who shipped you two together, fearing that acknowledging it might push you away. But in that moment, watching you immersed in your work, he was overwhelmed by the realization of how deeply he loved you. Jungwon knew with certainty that no one could love you the way he did, "Don’t you think we’d be the cutest pair?” Jungwon asked, his gaze fixed on his screen, too shy to meet your eyes. His words were accompanied by a soft, nervous smile. You giggled at his question, finding his hesitation endearing. “We already are, silly.” you replied warmly.
Hearing your response, Jungwon let out a breath of relief. His eyes slowly lifted from the hair that had fallen across his forehead, his fingers nervously fiddling with the drawstrings of his hoodie. As he looked up, he was met with your radiant, reassuring smile.
You reached across the table and gently took his hand in yours, giving it a tender squeeze. Jungwon’s heart raced as he felt the warmth of your touch, his nerves melting away. The simplicity and sweetness of the gesture made his feelings for you all the more intense. As he gazed into your eyes, he couldn’t help but think how incredibly fortunate he was to have someone as special as you by his side. The world seemed to stand still for a moment, and Jungwon knew, with absolute certainty, that he never wanted to let go.
…
As Jungwon delivered his speech, his gaze move across the sea of students and faculty before finally settling on you. Despite his dislike to public speaking, he spoke with a confidence fueled by his desire to inspire others and make you proud. With each word, he poured his heart into crafting a message that can resonate deeply.
As he reached the end of his speech, he paused for a moment, his voice tinged with emotion. “To hope is to live,” he said, “I still have a dream to reach, and achieving this was already a step towards it.” His hands trembled slightly as he concluded, his shyness evident in his final words of gratitude. “Thank you, everyone.” As the applause filled the room, Jungwon’s eyes sought yours again, hoping that you could see just how much this moment meant to him.
After a few more speeches and the excitement of the ceremony, students began tossing their mortarboards into the air. Jungwon made his way through the crowd, clutching a bouquet he had carefully prepared for you. His heart pounded with each step as he approached, only to find you already wrapped in the arms of Sunghoon, your boyfriend.
Sunghoon was the only man you seemed to notice with his advances, the only one who somehow slipped under Jungwon's radar. How could he have been so blind? Despite the sharp pang in his chest, Jungwon forced a smile as he neared you both, his other hand fidgeting and squeezing around his toga, struggling to mask the ache of his unspoken feelings. He offered Sunghoon a congratulatory nod, who returned it with a warm smile and a heartfelt “Congratulations.” Jungwon’s gaze shifted back to you, and he saw you squealing with excitement, your joy infectious.
When you finally turned to Jungwon, you greeted him with a tight hug. The embrace, meant for him alone, now enveloped him in a bittersweet moment. The scent of your perfume, which he had imagined would be his exclusive reminder of you, was now mixed with the warmth of Sunghoon’s presence. The hug that was supposed to be his alone felt like a cruel twist of fate, making his heart ache even more as he realized that the affection he had longed for was now shared with someone else.
Jungwon, feeling like a coward in the midst of his emotions, stood before you as you beamed with pride. “I’m so proud of you, my boy,” you said, your eyes brimming with happy tears as you cupped his face gently. Jungwon’s own eyes were clouded with sadness, the tears he fought so hard to keep at bay finally spilling over. “I’ll always be your boy, yeah?” he whispered, his voice barely above a tremor.
You laughed softly, your laugh like a bittersweet melody, leaving a tender kiss on his cheek, your affection clear but the meaning unmistakable. “Always, Jungwon,” you replied, your words carrying a platonic warmth that seemed to echo louder in his heart than he could admit.
Jungwon stood there, his heart aching as he realized how deeply his own feelings contrasted with yours. The kiss he had hoped would signify something more was a gentle reminder of the reality he had tried to ignore. The warmth of your embrace and the affection in your voice only served to amplify the distance between your hearts. He sniffled quietly, nodding and biting his lip to hold back the disappointment that threatened to overwhelm him. Even as he forced a smile, though it was a hollow expression trying to be happy for you and your new chapter with Sunghoon.
Jungwon was left with the crushing realization that he was merely a boy daydreaming of a future that would never be his, longing for a love that remained forever out of reach.
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𝐁𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐌𝐀𝐍 - 𝐍𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐌𝐔𝐑𝐀 𝐑𝐈𝐊𝐈
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desc. │ “ɪ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ɪ'ᴍ ᴘʀᴏʙᴀʙʟʏ ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ ᴏꜰꜰ ᴏɴ ᴍʏ ᴏᴡɴ, ᴛʜᴀɴ ʟᴏᴠɪɴ' ᴀ ᴍᴀɴ ᴡʜᴏ ᴅɪᴅɴ'ᴛ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʜᴇ ʜᴀᴅ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʜᴇ ʜᴀᴅ ɪᴛ” — ᴛᴀʏʟᴏʀ ꜱᴡɪꜰᴛ “ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ ᴍᴀɴ”.
warnings. │ ᴘᴏᴘᴜʟᴀʀ ʙᴏʏ!ɴɪ-ᴋɪ x ᴜɴᴘᴏᴘᴜʟᴀʀ!ꜰᴇᴍ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ. ᴀɴɢꜱᴛ, ᴛᴏxɪᴄ ᴛᴇᴇɴᴀɢᴇ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴꜱʜɪᴘ, ɴɪ-ᴋɪ ɪꜱ ᴋɪɴᴅᴀ ʜᴏʀʀɪʙʟᴇ ɪɴ ᴛʜɪꜱ, ɢᴀꜱʟɪɢʜᴛɪɴɢ.
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Your phone was ringing. The name that appeared on screen was one of whom you knew very well. Someone who had at one point made you feel like the most important person in the world.
but now all you felt was an ache deep in your chest. you had felt despair and disgust and just hurt. Riki hurt you, time and time again. You let him slither his way back into your life like a deadly serpent and every single time he would strike you.
he was venomous to you, he took advantage of your kind heart and clear desperation to be loved.
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He was sweet at first, that’s usually how every boy was. The relationship felt a lot like puppy love. He’d pick you up for dates with flowers in hand, ready to open the door to his car and restaurant doors for you. He would text you sweet message throughout the day reminding you of how beautiful you looked with your hair down or how sweet you smelled with your strawberry scented perfume.
It was perfect, but as we all know perfect never lasts. Riki was popular and you? not so much. He would party every weekend with his friends, throwing parties in the basement of their older buddies houses. They would drink cheap liquor and any beer they could get their hands on with fake id’s. it was a crowd you weren’t used to. yet you let Riki drag you along.
The first time you went to a party with Riki it had went okay for the most part. He drank a little more than you were used to but he was affectionate still, sweet even.
You drove him home, spent the night in his room and snuck out before dawn and before his parents would notice. it was kind of perfect. cuddle up with him in his childhood bed in his childhood home giggling about the various posters and teenage boy messiness to his room, you could have sworn you’ve never been more in love then you were in that very moment.
but he had to go and ruin it, just like he always did.
The first time Riki broke your heart was eight months into your relationship. He was having a hard week. Midterms were coming up, his baseball coach was busting his ass about coming to practice late almost every single day and above it all his parents decided to ground him after they found his stash of fake id’s in his dresser.
He wanted a stress reliever. Riki just wanted to forget about the week and have fun with his friends and his girlfriend. He snuck out of his house picking you up and taking you to the party where your perception of love would forever change.
The night was in full swing by 11pm but you just weren’t feeling it. Truthfully you never really are at these things, parties just weren’t your thing. You’d rather be at home cuddle up with riki watching reruns of friends all night. You only endured a few hours of drunken teenagers for Riki. He seemed to enjoy it and you loved seeing him happy.
You sat on a tiny sofa next to Riki, his friends surrounded the two of you passing around a bottle of cheap vodka. You didn’t drink Riki was already drunk so you knew you would end up driving anyway. For some reason Riki felt persistent tonight handing you the bottle everytime he got the chance.
You tried to blame it on his drunkenness. He just didn’t remember that you weren’t a drinker accidentally handing you the bottle because you were right next to him and not because he wanted you to drink it.
“Riki i’m not going to drink it” You had said laughing awkwardly as he handed you the bottle yet again. You passed the bottle over to Sunghoon who took it happily taking a big swing and passing it over again.
“Come on babe” Riki whined nudging your shoulder gently “Lighten up” His words were slurred along with his eyes glassy from all the drinks.
“Maybe that’s enough for you too” You said softly, trying to make your voice low enough for only him to hear.
Riki let out a loud scoff at your suggestion “What are you my fucking mom?” He snapped rolling his eyes, gaining the attention of the group around the two of you. You looked around, a small blush coating your cheeks at the embarrassment.
“Well no but you’re already drunk maybe you should st-“ Your sentence was cut off but a condescending laugh. “I’m not a child y/n don’t fucking act like i am”
“You don’t have to curse at me” Meekly you looked around at the group of drunk teens as they averted their eyes anywhere but the awkward situation happening in front of them.
“You’re such a goody-goody y/n no wonder no one here likes you” Riki was laughing at you. His words piercing you like a knife. “My friends tolerate you because you’re my girlfriend but honestly they don’t like you very much” He tilted his head at you mockingly driving the knife further into your already bleeding heart.
You looked around meeting the eyes of his friends who just shrugged at you not in the least bit worried that their friend had just outed them to you.
You got up in a rush. The air in the small basement feeling congested. As you left you heard laughs coming from the room you had just occupied. You were humiliated. Riki had said such horrible things and hadn’t even bat a single eye as you ran out of the room.
Tears ran down your face as you got into your car mentally praising yourself for driving your vehicle instead of Riki’s. As you pulled out of the driveway you felt even more dread at the fact that Riki hadn’t even tried to chase after you. He didn’t even care that he had humiliated you in front of all his friends. His mind was set on his next drink, the thought tore you in two.
The next day you had woken up to multiple texts and calls from Riki pleading for you to pick up and hear him out. That it was all a mistake, that he had just had a horrible week and drank too much. His friend didn’t actually dislike you, they loved you.
Deep down you knew he was lying but still you answered his calls and let him slither is way in convincing you that really was just having a hard week and got too drunk. You had convinced yourself that this would be the one and only time he would hurt you like that.
you were wrong. That was proven only two months later. Ten months into your relationship was the second time Riki had broken your heart. The last two months haven’t gone as smoothly as the beginning of your relationship. The honeymoon passing by in a broken blur of emotion.
The arguing between the two of you was more often than not. You had felt like you were giving 100% percent into your relationship as Riki just wasn’t. He was late for dates, answered less texts messages, ditched movie night to get drunk with his friends.
It was a cycle you couldn’t seem to shake. every time you would argue sending you driving home with blurry eyes and puffy cheeks and every time Riki would call soon after apologizing. Whispering sweet nothings into the phone reeling you back in like fish hooked on bait.
It was exhausting, and when you finally felt like things could maybe get better Riki had to go and prove you wrong.
He had planned a dinner, him. Not you. He told you to get dressed up, do you hair and makeup. He wanted to take you out. The first red flag should have been when he told he’d meet you there instead of picking up you like he usually did.
The second red flag was when he sent you a text ten minutes after the meeting time claiming he’d be there in five minutes. You sat in a small booth in the corner of a dark restaurant pushing around a sad side salad waiting for someone who was obviously not going to show.
You had sat there for forty-five minutes waiting, typing out unanswered text messages before you decided to finally leave. You paid your small bill and left a hallow version of yourself.
Getting home that night you scrolled through your instagram and was greeted with a picture that landed a straight punch to your gut.
It was picture of Riki he was sat next to Sunghoon, Heeseung and Jay all three with lopsided grins on their faces and drinks in their hands. The caption read “Pre- gaming for the party tonight!! see you there (;”
You heart was in your stomach at the realization that Riki had ditched you for a party. You dialed his number in a hurry sneaking a look at the time as it read 12:56am the party probably in full swing as this point. You were expecting Riki to answer but after a few rings he did.
He wasn’t drunk yet, you could tell by his voice. He was definitely tipsy though and before you could even get a word out he rushed out a “Please don’t bitch at me tonight y/n”
The hurt you had felt only seconds prior had vanished in an instant, a hot simmering anger in its place. “Are you kidding me Riki? You ditched me to go to a party?!” You voice was tight and sharp.
“Something important came up, Jay just broken up with were helping him get over her” He spoke nonchalantly causing your anger to triple.
“You’re playing with me” You said blankly “this is a joke”
“It’s not a joke y/n i needed to be there for my friend” He was agitated with you, you could tell by the way his voice rose just slightly.
“and what about your girlfriend Riki? she needed you too”
“Don’t be dramatic y/n you’re fine” The boy rolled his eyes growing tired of the conversation.
“You ditched me” You said once again at a loss for words at the audacity.
“You said that already” Riki said matter of factly. Each word that he spat out at you was another stab at your already punctured heart.
“honestly y/n i don’t have time for this. you’re being needy and i don’t want deal with it”
“if you hang up we’re done.” You said firmly, trying hard to stand your ground and pray he can’t detect the crumbling of your demeanor. You couldn’t be weak.
“Whatever. i don’t need this” The line went dead. The weight of what just happened crashing into you like a hurricane and you were in its path of destruction. He had hung up ultimately accepting your break up without a single thought.
It stung more than ever before. More than all the petty useless arguments. He didn’t care at all.
The snake hadn’t come for forgiveness as quick as it did last time. No, Riki took a few days before he came crawling back. He came back in the form of a knock on your door and a bouquet of beautiful red roses.
He had begged you, again, to forgive him. Asking for you to come on a ride in his car so he could talk to you. and like the dumb naive girl you were you did. You went with him and he convinced you to take him back with just a few kisses and promises you knew we’re going to be left empty.
The last time Riki broke you heart was one year and three months into your relationship.
Your birthday was a year you’ve always deemed memorable. Having had the privilege of a good home life and loving parents had its perks. You were excited this year more than any to celebrate it with your boyfriend. Riki had teased all week at the possibility of an amazing present.
Your hopes were high eager to spend the day with the boy you loved so deeply. At the start of the day it was great, amazing even. Riki had taken you to lunch at a cute little cafe were he spoiled you with various baked treats. He had taken you to the bookstore to walk around and browse. He did the boyfriend thing carrying all the books you wanted them paid for them.
You spent the day perfectly content with him, all the hardships of the past few months had dissipated. When night had fallen he told you that he was throwing a small get together for you at Sunghoon’s house. You thought it innocent enough. Little did you know this was the ultimate downfall of your relationship.
The party was going fine, you had been greeted by most of riki’s friends happy birthday wishes past around you in heaps. You were having a good time talking to people and even having one cup of beer, albeit you only slowly sipped at it not really liking the taste.
You were perched on the couch in the living room chatting with a girl that you hadn’t remembered the name of when you realized Riki had been gone for quite some time. Curious to where he was you ventured towards the kitchen in search of him.
Your name stopped you in your tracks before you could fully enter the kitchen.
“Cool party dude.” Heeseung’s voice rung over the array of people occupying the kitchen filling their empty cups with more beer. “I’m surprised miss goody-goody is actually enjoying it she’s always too good for these things it’s seems” Your eyebrows knit together in confusion and disgust. bracing yourself to hear how Riki would defend you against the nasty comment his friend had made. but instead he laughed, a short chuckle that had reverberated through your bones and straight your heart.
“I know. I finally got her to loosen up a bit. it’s a shame i’m going to dump her soon maybe she’s finally beginning to be fun” Your body froze in its place, hugging the wall to keep you balance. Riki…was going to break up with you? And he admitted him to his friends right here at your birthday party. You felt sick to your stomach.
“Hey maybe i can get a turn with her” Jake joked with what sounded like a pat on the back to Riki.
“Nah man, you don’t want my sloppy seconds” The boys laughed. unaware that the butt of their amusement was just feet away from them listening.
Before you could stop yourself you had stepped into the crowded kitchen catching the eye of the occupants. A panicked looked crossed over Sunghoon’s face looking over at Riki with wide eyes. “Riki” He said motioning to me.
Riki looked up his eyes catching my glassy ones, his face turning as white as sheet.
“Don’t bother waiting any longer to dump me” You said. Mentally cursing yourself when it came out shakey. “We’re done. for good”
You turned, rushing quickly out of the kitchen and threw the sea of drunk people. Riki was hot on your tail calling your name like a mantra, but you ignored it continuing to barrel through the people and finally out of the door into the cold air of the outside.
“Y/n! wait please!” A hand wrapped around your wrist. You yanked it free turning around in a midst of anger. “Don’t touch me!” Riki’s eyes were wide, a sheen glassed over them.
“Please let me ex-“
You started walking away before he could get the words out but he again followed suit. “I didn’t mean it. i was just trying to impress my friends”
You scoffed “I never want to see you again” You cried tears running down your face. You turned to look at him. “I hope you’re happy” You whispered. “You ruined my birthday but obliterating my heart. congratulations.”
Riki shook his head reaching his hand out to you in attempt at touching you. You stepped back not allowing him too close. “I love you.” He said “I didn’t mean it”
“Just stop” You said before turning around once more and leaving. This time Riki didn’t follow, and for once you were relieved that he didn’t.
and today, your phone was ringing. The name on screen was that of someone you thought you knew. but really you didn’t. Not at all.
You declined the call.
——
@en-log (:
book lovers ; park jongseong
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pairing: booknerd/bf!jay x booknerd!afab!reader word count: 3.2k synopsis: when your book loving boyfriend has you read a specific part of the current book you’re reading out loud to him. warnings: book reading shenanigans, swearing, SMUT, marking, dry humping, praising, hair pulling, fingering, unprotected sex, finger sucking, cum eating, slight choking, lmk if I missed anything, MINORS DNI!! specially dt to: @niki-riki-nishimura-riki 🩵
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Of course, it would be on the top shelf. Why wouldn’t it be?
You tucked your button lip between your teeth, glancing around the bookstore to see if any ladder or step stool was available, and to your dismay, there wasn’t.
And as much as you’d love the climb up these shelves like a fucking gremlin, you hold yourself back and instead stand on your tippy toes to reach as high as the length of your arm would let you. It's not your fault you’re a short queen.
Or that you already have a stack of books in your other arm tucked closely to your body that may or may not be another reason you can’t reach the top shelf.
Who are you kidding, it’s honestly just because you’re short.
You feel with another willpower and praying, your fingers will grab the spin of the book and pull it from the shelf. Once you can get a grip, it’s being pulled from the shelf—but not by you.
With confusion written on your face, you turn to grab the book, slowly placing both feet back firmly on the ground. The one who grabbed it was incredibly handsome. Dark hair and black glasses pushed up his nose, his hair falling over the frames as he looked at the cover of the book, blue button-up long-sleeved that was rolled up to his elbows, and black slacks. He finally looks up at you, a small smile curling up.
“You know, I was caught between if I should continue to watch you struggle—and laugh, or to help you,” you raised a brow at him, damn tall people, “I chose the ladder.”
“Obviously,” you mumble, reaching for the book as he extends it out to you, “But thank you for deciding to help me.”
He smiles more, eyes drifting to your book in the other arm, “Nice book haul you have there,” he points to the books and you all of a sudden forget what you even had in your arms.
You quickly glance down, seeing a few volumes of manga, a new fantasy book your best friend recommended, a popular fiction title, and lastly, the book you were having trouble reaching, “Uh thanks,” you say, looking back up at him, and noticing his own couple books in his arm, “You have good taste as well.”
“Ah! Thanks!” he glances down at the carpeted floor, “Not every day you meet someone with the same book interests as yourself.”
Now it was your turn to smile, “Yeah, really is hard to find nowadays.”
He made eye contact with you and you swore your heart stopped, lips parting slightly. His dark orbs really drew you in. Until he places his index finger on the book he grabbed for you, “Pretty cute covers like these always have the nastiest smut in them.”
Your face heats up. With a grin, he turns and starts to walk away, “You’d know, wouldn’t you!” You shout, loving the way he turns back around and gives you a wink.
“Obviously!” he shouts as he is further away, “We like the same genres.”
You don’t know what came over you, because the next you knew, you were shouting even more, “YN!”
“Jay!” he replies, tilting his head towards the check out, “Let me buy your books, YN.”
A year and a half later, you still get Jay’s heart racing just like when you two first met. He’s hooked on you. Absolutely fucking hooked. You were also completely hooked on him too. Not even hesitating to let him buy your books that day and even agreeing to get coffee with him afterward. Which obviously led to exchanging phone numbers, book recs, and eventually make-out sessions after meeting up a few times. The two of you just fit so well, two pieces of a perfect puzzle. Of course, it was meant to be and of course, you said yes when he asked you to be his girlfriend, how could you not when he showed up to your doorstep with a bag of books from your to-be-read list and a bouquet of your favorite flowers and your favorite coffee two months after meeting.
Jay just couldn’t get enough of you. You are his every waking and sleeping thought. So it only made sense for him to ask you to move into his studio apartment with him nine months into your relationship. It was the second easiest thing he’s ever done, the first being buying your books that first day.
The hardest thing though, was adding your book collection to his. You had to buy a second shelf just so all your books had a home. But Jay didn’t mind one bit. Honestly, it gave him a reason to not buy even more books and to just steal from your stack.
It’s the perfect relationship, truly.
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You are lying comfortably on your stomach in bed, swinging your legs back and forth with your nose in your recent read. It’s a mixture of fantasy and romance with some HEAVY smut scenes. You truly had no idea this book had so much graphic sexual content, but hey! You’re not complaining!
The two main protagonists were starting to get steamy when the front door unlocked. You turn and glance over your shoulder, smiling up at your boyfriend as he walks in the door, “Welcome back home, Seongie.”
Jay gives you his loving smile, “Good to be back, baby,” he glances down to the book in your hands, kicking his shoes off as he closes the door behind him, “Did you make a trip to the bookstore today?”
You nod, turning back to your book, “I even got that new sci-fi book you were talking to Heeseung about the other day. I was fixing to head to the checkout when I noticed it on one of the new release tables. Thought you’d appreciate it.”
And oh god did he appreciate it more than words could express, “Thank you so much, baby,” he whispers, leaning over the bed to press a kiss to your forehead, “What are you reading anyway?” You didn’t stop him nor did you stop reading as he tilted the book to look at the cover, “You’re such a pervert.”
You roll your eyes and swat his hand away, “As if, do I need to remind you of all the smut books on your shelf?”
In any normal relationship, one would get embarrassed to be caught or find their partner reading something smutty, but thankfully your relationship with Jay isn’t normal. Both of you read sexual books all the time. Never once has it bothered either of you. Maybe it’s because your sex life was fucking fantastic and you both felt comfortable and secure with each other and sex that it wasn’t—nor ever will be—a problem.
Jay chuckles and you continue your read, the two protags are finally getting it on and you need to know how it ends.
Obviously, it piqued your boyfriend's interest on how good this sex scene has to be that you continued reading even though he just got home from a very long workday. So he leaned further into the bed, placing one hand on the other side of you and tilting his head against the top of yours.
Fuck.
His pants suddenly grew tighter against him. No wonder your interest was so attached to this book at the moment. He doesn’t blame you one bit.
But now he has a problem, and the idea that just slipped through his brain is too good to pass up.
Jay pulled your hair to the side, kissing from your temple and down to your neck, sucking the skin into his mouth, just like the male protagonist is currently doing in the book. You lean into him, knowing exactly what he is doing and still gripping the book in your hands.
“Jay,” you breathe.
“Read it out loud,” he whispers, flattening his tongue against the now purple mark he’s left on your skin and laying his body against yours. His hard length pressing to your ass, “Read out the steps to me, baby.”
With a shaky voice, you read out what the male protagonist is doing to the female protagonist. Jay’s hands move up and down your body like in the book. Squeezing your sides as he sucks more of your skin between his teeth on your neck. Leaving more and more love marks scattered around your skin.
You’re already dizzy by just his kisses and touch. You’ve only ever dreamed about recreating sexual acts from your books and the fact it’s happening right now, the exact way you’re reading out loud, how could you not be dizzy?
“Keep reading, baby,” he bites the shell of your ear, grinding his hips against your ass, his cock twitching between your perfect cheeks. His head spun knowing you aren’t wearing any panties under your shorts.
Jay, honestly, has been wanting to spice up your sex life for a while now. Not that sex with you wasn’t fantastic already, or even in need of changing. He personally just wants to find more ways to pleasure you. To fulfill your every fantasy. What better way than to create the acts in this book?
“H-he’s wrapping her hair in his fist,” you barely make out, feeling a shift in the bed as your boyfriend pulls your hair back, twisting it around his hand, his lips not leaving your body, “P-pull it.”
Jay hums against your neck, pulling your hair, forcing you to crank your head to the side, exposing your neck even more to him, sinking his teeth back into your skin.
You close your eyes, relishing how good this feels, dropping the book onto the pillow. But the feeling is short-lived once Jay catches wind of this, loosening his grip on your hair and removing his mouth from your neck, “Stop reading, and I stop too.”
“Take my clothes off,” you quickly mumble, picking the book back up and focusing on the words on the page, “He’s removing her clothing…please.”
Jay smirks, his warm fingertips brushing against your skin at your hips, moving up your body. Goosebumps rise on your skin from his touch, “Such a good girl, baby,” he praises you, your shirt now bunched just below your breasts, “What position are they in?”
You bite your tongue, skimming to the top of the page where you first saw it, “Her back is pressed to his chest.”
With a yank of your hair still in his fist, your back was now pressed tightly against his, his cock now gently grinding against your lower back. Jay dropped your hair to place both hands on you, slowly lifting your shirt above your breasts, fingers gently gliding over them, “My next step?”
Your hands tremble as you continue to read the page, giving him step by step on what is happening. Your shirt is now thrown across the room along with Jay’s shirt and pants, leaving him in his boxers and bare chest to your back. Hands cupping your breast and squeezing them in motion of his hips grinding against you.
He did each step you read, leaving now your bare bodies touching, his teeth once again sinking into the skin of your neck just below your ear. One hand squeezed your breast while the other snaked down to your clit, rubbing soft circles. With shaky hands, you turned the page, barely being able to do that simple task as your boyfriend abused your swollen clit, and your nipple now being flicked and pinched between his thumb and index finger.
You honestly just wanted him to fuck you already. Your cunt clenching around nothing and your head going dizzy from the amount of moaning and heavy breathing you’re doing, trying so hard to keep yourself upright.
“Seongie, please,” you beg, “Please.”
Jay shifts his face to the other side of your neck, satisfied with all the red and purple marks on the other side and knowing damn well the male character is very much still marking up his female. Jay secretly has been reading along with you. How could he not? This was hot as fuck to him, “Please, what, baby?” He knows what you want. But you’re not getting it until it happens in the book, “Be a good girl and keep reading. You’ll get what you want, my sweet girl.”
Jay skimmed the next line on the page, “He slowly removes his finger from my clit,” Jay read out loud, “Continue it.”
You swallow, “And slide the middle and ring fingers into my—ahh!” You don’t even get to finish the sentence, feeling your boyfriend’s fingers pushing between your gummy walls and curling them up onto your spot. Pumping them quickly in and out.
To be honest, Jay was also starting to get impatient. His precum covered your lower back and left a string connecting each time he rutted against you. He’s already read far enough ahead on the page to know exactly when he gets to fuck you. And it’s so so close.
“Such a good girl, baby,” he moans into your ear, grinding against you faster in movement with his fingers. You fling your head back on his shoulder. He raised his shoulder to push your head back up, “Keep reading. What do I do to you next?”
With slightly blurry vision, you focus on the words on the page, “Fingering until my pussy is dripping cum down my thighs and your fingers, you picking up your pace.”
“Oh, fuck,” he breathes, pressing your body tightly against him, shoving his digits in and out faster than before. Your whole body is squirming against him. Your moans fill the apartment along with strings of fuck and his name. Continuing his movements of abusing your hole until you once again fling your head back against his shoulder, dropping the book to the store and thighs squeezing his hand as you came unglued.
And sure enough, your cum dripped down both your thighs and covered his hand.
Jay slowly pulled his fingers from your soaked hole, collecting your essence and raising his two fingers to his lips, sticking his tongue out and wrapping it around them. Eyes rolling to the back of his head as he sucks his own fingers, completely losing it at the taste of your cum.
Jay couldn’t wait anymore. The book was long pushed to the back of his mind. Not that he needed to read it anymore anyway, he knew exactly what to do.
And no longer had the patience to wait.
One moment you were pressed against your boyfriend, the next you were face first into the pillows, your hips hiked up and Jay’s legs spreading yours apart. Yessss, this was exactly what you wanted. What you’ve craved for since the moment he started touching you and reading out loud to him.
“Yes, babe,” you moaned into the pillows, turning your head just enough to look at his face, seeing the look of pure lust and want on him. His eyes burn with the desire to tear you apart and leave nothing left once he’s done with you. And oh good fucking god you want him to destroy you, “Fuck me to pieces, oh god Jay please!”
Oh was this music to his ears. Jay pressed his chest to your back, licking at the shell of your ear, his hand stroking himself slowly, “Yeah, YN? Do you want my cock that bad? Want me to split you open?”
You nod fiercely, gripping at the bedsheets. Rough sex with Jay always left you unable to walk after, but with how he is right now, you knew you’d barely be able to survive this time.
Not another second was wasted as he pushed his cock inside you. Both hands gripping your hips, fucking into you at a fast pace. You arch your back and press your ass as much as you could to him, his hip bones surely were going to leave bruises against your cheeks. Not that you cared, you welcomed any marks you received from him during sex.
“Fuck! Jay!” you whine, knuckles turning white from your grip on the sheets.
Jay knew he wasn’t going to last much longer, not from the amount of grinding he did on your back earlier and at his quick pace right now. But he can’t help it. You feel so fucking good and he loves how well his cock slides in and out of your cunt from how wet you are for him. He needed to cum. Now.
With a pull of your hair, your back is pressed to his chest. One hand slightly grips your neck while the other finds your clit again, “I’m fixing to cum, baby,” he breathes into your ear, sending chills down your body, “Can you cum for me again? Can you give me one more?”
You try your best to answer verbally but settle for another nod, taking a deep breath in the best way you can with your airways being slightly constricted but it still has your cunt clenching tightly around his cock, sucking him perfectly.
His tip kisses your cervix with each sloppy thrust and fingers aggressively circling your clit, the knot in your tummy ready to burst for the second time of the night.
“J-Jay,” you manage to push out, “Cu-cum..I’m cumming.”
Jay leans his head against yours, “Fuck me too, oh fuck me too baby girl.”
Your second organism releases at the same time his cum fills you whole. His hips slapped against your ass to a halt, making sure every last drop of cum spilled into your cunt. Jay moans out your name, slightly tightening his fingers around your neck until he comes down from his high and pulls out. With a shift motion, he collects the mixture of both your cum onto his fingers, “Can’t waste this, can we, YN?”
His fingers come into your vision and on instinct, you open your mouth wide and tongue hanging out, ready for the salty and sweet taste of his fingers and both your cum to fill your taste buds. And oh man does it have you reeling once the digits fill your mouth. Your lips close around him, tongue swirling around and between his fingers, sucking up every last drop.
You pout once his fingers are removed, and pout even more when the cold air touches your back from his disappearance.
You barely can drop to your knees and twist around to see the beautiful and sexy naked back half of your boyfriend standing at the bookshelf.
“Jay?” you call for him, swallowing your spit to soothe your now dry mouth, “Are you looking for something?”
He has a smirk on his face as he turns around, a new book in his hand, “This one has the nastiest fuck scene. You down for round two?”
Not even waiting for your answer, you’re being pulled to the edge of the bed, Jay now kneeling in front of you, the open book being shoved into your hands. You glance down to see the first line, the male character starting off eating his wife's pussy.
Jay spreads your shaking legs apart, leaving gentle love bites on your thigh, “Go ahead, YN. Read.”
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@kookify @abysofsteel @aileeeeeeeeeeeee @hee-lvrr @1309zip
@moon0fthenight @jakeflvrz @021894s @sendhelpiloveyeonjun @surrik-i
@heeseungsbm @star-hoon
post arguement — park sunghoon
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pairing: bf!sunghoon x fem!reader
genre: angst (resolved), fluff
synopsis: waking up the next day after an argument, sunghoon is a little shy to ask you to follow up your daily routine together.
• help palestine, click me
sunghoon had always been the quiet type, never one to express too much, but last night’s argument was different.
it left an uncomfortable tension lingering between you two, something neither of you were used to. you tossed and turned in bed, unable to find peace, the memory of harsh words replaying in your mind like a broken record.
the morning light filtered softly through the curtains, casting a warm glow across the room. you had barely slept, your mind restless with unresolved thoughts.
you felt a soft nudge on your arm, and as you blinked your eyes open, there was sunghoon, standing beside the bed, his expression unreadable, a mix of uncertainty and something else you couldn’t quite place.
he hesitated for a moment, as if he was trying to find the right words. “can you… do that thing?” he finally mumbled, his voice barely above a whisper, his gaze flickering away from yours.
it was unlike him to ask for anything, especially after a fight, but you knew what he meant. every morning, without fail, you’d apply his skincare for him, a small act that had somehow become your routine.
you let out a sleepy groan, turning away from him and pulling the covers over your head. “not today, hoon,” you murmured, your voice muffled, teasing him just a little, but deep down, you knew you couldn’t actually refuse him.
he stood there for a moment, the silence stretching out between you two.
“please?” he added, a little softer this time, a rare vulnerability in his voice that made your heart soften. it wasn’t like him to ask twice.
you sighed softly, sitting up and pushing the covers off. “fine,” you said, rolling your eyes playfully as you climbed out of bed.
“but only because you said please.” despite the remnants of last night’s argument hanging in the air, you didn’t have it in you to say no to him. maybe this was his way of making peace, in the only way he knew how.
“thanks,” he mumbled, almost too quiet to hear, but you caught the sincerity in his voice.
you slipped out of bed, your feet padding softly on the cold floor as you headed to the small vanity where you kept the skincare products.
sunghoon followed you, his steps equally soft, almost as if he was afraid to break the fragile silence that had settled between you two.
“you know, you could’ve just done it yourself today,” you teased lightly, grabbing the moisturizer and turning to face him.
he shook his head, sitting down on the edge of the bed.
“it’s not the same,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper, his gaze fixed on the floor. it was rare for him to be this open, and it made you pause for a second.
you motioned for him to sit properly, and he complied, scooting back a bit so he was closer to you.
you took a deep breath, your hands working automatically as you unscrewed the cap of his moisturizer. the familiar scent filled the space between you, and for a moment, it felt like everything was back to normal.
“you’re such a baby, you know that?” you said, your tone playful as you smoothed the cream onto your fingers.
“only for you,” he replied, his lips curving into the smallest of smiles, and you felt your heart skip a beat.
you gently applied the moisturizer to his face, your touch soft and careful, as if you were trying to erase the harshness of the previous night with every gentle swipe.
sunghoon’s eyes closed, his face relaxing under your touch, and you could feel the tension slowly melting away.
neither of you spoke, the silence was heavy but not uncomfortable. it was the kind of silence that spoke volumes, the kind that said everything you both were too afraid to put into words.
you finished with the moisturizer, your fingers lingering on his skin for a moment longer before you pulled away.
but instead of standing back up, you suddenly decided to straddle his lap, settling yourself comfortably as you faced him. his eyes flew open, a hint of surprise in them as you smiled down at him, your hands resting on his shoulders.
“what are you doing?” he asked, his voice a little shaky, clearly flustered by your sudden proximity.
“just making sure you’re not going anywhere,” you teased, leaning in to smooth out the moisturizer on his forehead.
you could feel the warmth of his body beneath you, his breath hitching slightly as your fingers grazed his skin.
sunghoon was trying hard to keep his composure, but you could see the faint blush creeping up his neck, spreading to his cheeks.
“you’re really… close,” he mumbled, his hands hesitantly finding their way to your waist, unsure of where to put them.
“is that a problem?” you asked, your tone teasing as you finished up with his skincare, your hands lingering on his cheeks for a moment longer.
he shook his head, his eyes flickering up to meet yours for just a second before they darted away again. “no… it’s just… different,” he admitted, his voice barely audible, but you caught the shy smile playing on his lips.
you leaned in closer, your face just inches from his, your breath mingling with his as you whispered, “different can be good, you know.”
he didn’t respond, but you could see the way his eyes softened, the way his hands tightened slightly around your waist, holding you just a little closer.
“about last night…” he started, his voice hesitant, his gaze flickering to the side, avoiding yours. “i’m… i didn’t mean to make you upset.”
you felt a small smile tug at your lips, his awkwardness endearing. “i know,” you replied softly, reaching out to take his hand, squeezing it gently.
“i’m sorry too, i shouldn’t have snapped at you.”
he finally looked back at you, a hint of relief in his eyes.
“we’re okay, right?” he asked, his voice quiet, almost as if he was afraid of your answer.
“yeah, we’re okay,” you reassured him, giving his hand another squeeze. “just… try not to be such a grump next time, okay?”
he huffed out a small laugh, the tension finally breaking.
“i’ll try,” he promised, a shy smile playing on his lips.
for a moment, you just sat there, side by side, the morning light wrapping around you like a gentle embrace.
and though the argument wasn’t entirely forgotten, the weight of it had lessened, replaced by the quiet understanding that you’d work through it together, just like you always did.
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• REBLOG if you enjoyed, do not copy or repost.
chapstick challenge
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pairing: lee heeseung x fem!reader
genres: fluff, suggestive
wc: 1163
warnings: making out
summary: the chapstick challenge is just an excuse for you to get heeseung to kiss you. thankfully, he’s more than happy to oblige.
note: i don’t have the motivation to write but i didn’t wanna let the blog die either so here’s another repost :)
masterlist
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“Heeseung!” you popped cheerfully and poked his cheek with your pencil. “Can I ask you something?”
The boy looked at you suspiciously. “What do you want?”
“Do I always have to want something from you?” you asked, your bottom lip jutting out in a pout.
“You’re being weirdly nice and unnecessarily upbeat at 8:30 in the morning so—” he shrugged— “yes.”
“Okay, yeah, I do want something,” you deadpanned, dropping your charade immediately. Heeseung rolled his eyes and you shoved his shoulder playfully in response. “But you have to promise you won’t say no.”
“No.”
“Boo!” you complained. “You’re such a party pooper!”
Refraining the urge to roll his eyes again, Heeseung reminded you, “The last time you made me promise to not say no, we ended up in the goddamn police station.”
“That’s on you for running too slow.”
“You forgot to pick up the bag with the fucking spray paints, Y/N!” he exclaimed incredulously. “They’re expensive!”
“I didn’t mind ditching the bag if it meant our parents remained uninformed about what happened that night!”
Letting out a long sigh of exasperation, Heeseung said, “Just tell me. The free period will be over soon.”
“Okay,” you declared and dragged your chair closer to his desk. Gesturing for him to come closer, you whispered in his ear, “It’s a TikTok challenge.”
The disappointment on Heeseung’s face could not have been more evident. “I thought you had something interesting to tell me. This was so lame.”
“C’mon!” you urged. “I swear it’ll be fun!”
“You know I’m not into TikTok.”
“Are you opposed to the idea of kissing me too?”
“Oh.” His demeanour changed immediately and he leaned towards you with a curious expression on his face. “Tell me more.”
“You’re such a dork,” you teased.
“I’m down for anything that involves kissing you,” he admitted shamelessly and shrugged. “Maybe this will finally persuade you to be my girlfriend. What’s the challenge?”
You snorted. You and Heeseung were definitely more than friends, but you weren’t exactly dating either. He wanted the two of you to be together, but you weren’t inclined to get involved with him—he was moving to another country for college in a few months.
It was already hard for you to come to terms with the fact as a friend. You weren’t sure you’d be able to cope if you began dating him.
Heeseung tried to convince you that you could make a long-distance relationship work, but you knew better than that. It wasn’t realistic—the timezones weren’t compatible at all and you were both way too career oriented to be able to commit to someone who lived on the other side of the world.
So, you just flirted with each other without ever putting a label on whatever you were. A few platonic makeout sessions here and there, a few not-a-real-date dates to make memories, but never girlfriend and boyfriend.
“I apply a bunch of different chapstick flavours and you try to guess them.”
Heeseung grinned mischievously. “Oh, I love what you have in mind.”
“Meet me at our usual spot during lunch break?” you asked, your lips mirroring his contagious smile.
“Can’t wait.”
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“Will we be recording the challenge?”
You raised an eyebrow and looked at Heeseung over your shoulder. Tightening your grip on his hand as you tugged him along faster, you said, “I wasn’t planning to. Do you want to?”
“I don’t know,” he admitted. “I’ll just get self-conscious.”
You laughed. “Are you saying you’re camera shy?”
“I’m saying I would rather focus on the challenge!” he exclaimed, the tips of his ears turning red with embarrassment.
“Relax.” You chucked and let go of his hand. “I’m just messing with you. We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”
Fetching an eye mask from the pocket of your hoodie, you handed it to Heeseung and told him to put it on. He did, and you uncapped the first chapstick.
After putting it on, you grabbed his tie and pulled him closer. His arm immediately wrapped around your waist, his hand finding its way to your jaw and cupping it gently.
Then, his mouth was on yours. You were a little surprised by how easily he was handling you even though he couldn’t see anything. It made you realise just how well he knew you—how much you’d gotten used to being with each other.
Heeseung tilted his head to the side for better access and ran his tongue over your bottom lip, sucking on it to get a better taste of the flavour you had applied.
“Strawberry,” he guessed without bothering to break the kiss.
You hummed. “You’re good at this.”
He smiled against your mouth and kissed the corner of your lip before pulling away. Removing the eye mask, he asked, “At guessing flavours or at making out?”
“Guessing flavours,” you said with a smirk and slung your arms around his neck. “I’m gonna need to conduct more experiments to reach a conclusion on that regard.”
“Oh, yeah?” he teased, running his thumb up and down the curve of your waist. “Go ahead and apply a second flavour then.”
You did, and this time, Heeseung wasn’t sweet nor gentle. He pretty much had you pinned against the wall, your fingers weaving through his hair and tugging at the strands.
The kiss was deeper and messier, as if the boy couldn’t get enough of you. Could never get enough of you.
His tongue forced its way into your mouth and you knew he wasn’t holding back anymore. He nibbled on your bottom lip, sucking and licking till you lost sense of everything else but him.
Out of breath, you broke the kiss, but Heeseung, it seemed, was nowhere near done. He placed his lips on your neck, allowing you to get some much needed oxygen into your system.
“That’s not where the chapstick is,” you whispered. You wanted his mouth back on yours. Now.
“Chocolate,” he muttered, sucking hard on the underside of your jaw. You hissed in both pleasure and pain. “It’s chocolate.”
Panting, he detached his lips from your skin and leaned against the wall next to you. You glanced at him and noticed that his tie had come loose.
Not only that, but part of his shirt had also somehow untucked itself and his hair was sticking in all directions. What you loved the most about his dishevelled appearance, though, were his swollen lips.
“Bingo,” you confirmed, resisting the urge to pull him against you again. “It was chocolate.”
Heeseung smirked. “Do I get a reward for passing the challenge?”
You didn’t answer immediately, instead fixing your uniform and hair. He watched you intently with dark eyes.
On your way out of the alley between the two secluded buildings at the back of your school, you said, “Why don’t you meet me back here after class and find out?”
The mischievous glint in Heeseung’s eyes was all the answer you needed.

omg the mention of camping in your new heejake fic has me thinking of scenarios in a TENT why am i blushing gn
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LOST TIME
PAIRING ➩ heeseung x reader (ex beomgyu x reader mentioned)
SUMMARY ➩ you and your bestfriends, growing up together since you were babies, had a tradition of going camping together every summer. this year you get paired up to share a tent with the boy you’ve been in love with since elementary.
WC ➩ 7.7k
AUTHORS NOTE ➩ honestly this was meant to just be a straight up PWP work due to the request but i got way too into the friendship dynamics and backstory lol.. idk if any other writers relate but sometimes smut just doesn’t feel like it fits in stories but i hope you still like this and maybe ill write something more nsfw later on with this prompt (not proofread and written at like 6am like always lol)
It wasn’t like camping was something you absolutely hated. In fact, for the first 20 years of your life it had been the single thing you looked forward to most throughout the busy year.
At some point it had developed into a promised tradition, an accidental hobby that you and your friend’s coincidentally carried on all throughout your shared childhood and high school.
Your parents had all grown up together too and lived on the same street once they were old enough to start their own families, keeping their tight knit connections and extending it to their partners and children later on in life. You grew up with a community because of this, your neighbors being people you’d spent your entire life around as they were basically family now.
It wasn’t a surprise to any of your parents and their friends families when they all also had kids around the same time, the biggest gap between babies being just over 4 years.
This was how your best friends came to be, as smooth and naturally as gaining a sibling or meeting a soulmate. You grew up surrounded with the same kids, going to the same school and spending holidays together at one of the houses on the shared culdesac.
The camping tradition was started before you even could register what was happening, photos of your parents lined up in bathing suits, holding different sized babies down near the lake shore with bright smiles and sunburns were your only proof that you’d been there as long as you have. As you got older and could enjoy the activities more, it became your favorite thing to do.
Your parents all got older right alongside you and they eventually stopped coming with, knowing you and the other kids would have fun out there while also being safe and smart.
So you continued on like that, all pitching up tents for the weekend and spending your time relaxing on tubes in the river or talking around the campfire, letting off the stress the year had brought you as you finished up high school and entered different colleges.
So it was slightly out of character that you were groaning as you packed your suitcase, complaining to Sunoo on the other side of the phone as he carried out the same action a few houses down.
“It’s just terrible timing.” Your voice was louder than normal as you disappeared into your closet in search of something warm for the colder temperatures at night. “Beomgyu and I are barely even broken up and I’m so behind on class work I could die.”
“Well you know it’s the same time every year Y/N, it’s not like it was sprung on you. Plus Beomgyu broke up with you last fall. I’d say you’re officially over by now.” Sunoo’s voice was barely audible from back in your bedroom but you still sighed and leaned your head onto your dressed with a thud.
He was always brutally honest with you considering he’d known you since you were infants, being the two closest in age out of the rest of you. When you first started school most of the teachers had assumed you were twins, wearing matching clothes and stuck at the hip everywhere you went.
You’d ditched The Shining like fashion now that you were adults but you still were the closest to him out of everybody, having applied to the same college together.
“Plus we haven’t seen the others since the holidays. This is the longest we’ve been apart, aren’t you excited?” His voice was picking up a hopeful tone as he tried to cheer you up and change your mood around.
You sighed softly again and walked back to your bedroom, grabbing your phone from the bed and holding it to your ear so you could hear him better. Leaning forward to look out your window across the small chunk of yard that separated you from your neighbor, you could see him sitting in his chair with a big smile on his face.
“You’ll be sick of them in an hour.” You remarked and knocked on the window, his head picking up to look over at you.
“I’m always sick of them.” He was rolling his eyes and you watched his mouth move in silence as the phone audio lagged behind a few seconds. “That’s the best part.”
You smiled at that and nodded although he wasn’t looking at you anymore, turning back to his bag. You did miss your other friends, almost an impossible amount.
You spent a lot of nights in your dorm room thinking about them and how horrible it was to be apart, replaying the goodbyes you all gave each other at the airport over and over in your mind as you tried to remain hopeful for the next time you could reunite. Nothing could prepare you for how difficult it was to separate for them, your parents all watching you with sad smiles in the background as you cried and hugged each other.
Coming home for Christmas felt like you’d gained a piece of your heart back, spending the entire break inseparable and having more fun than you possibly could with the more casual friends you’d met in school.
Your parents hadn’t nagged you for not being home a lot or felt sad that you all rather be together than with them for Christmas Eve and morning, understanding more than anybody else what it felt like to have such friendships.
“Aren’t you excited to see Heeseung?” Sunoo’s voice cut into your happy daydreams and the smile fell from your face at his teasing tone, stiffening slightly as he glanced at you from his room again, an eyebrow raised in amusement at your reaction.
“I’m excited to see everybody.” You said stiffly and he let out a small laugh at your sudden serious tone, knowing you had caught on to what he was implying. “Sunoo, don’t make it weird.”
“I’m not.” He gasped like it was an offensive thing to suggest, standing and approaching the window so you could see him better as he continued to tease you. “I just think it might be interesting considering this is the first time you’ve seen your childhood lover since being single again.”
“Do not call him that.” You were groaning and flopping back on your bed to which he let out another amused laugh.
You loved all of your friends equally, each one of them bringing a different set of pros to your life and helping to shape your personality as you grew up and molded into the person you were now. They were your family, brothers you never had and they felt the same way about you, resulting in no one ever dating within the group or causing awkward moments that could potentially upset the harmonious balance.
Lee Heeseung was the exception.
Despite Sunoo’s ridiculous phrasing he had never been your lover, not even remotely coming close to it. In fact things were almost more platonic with him than anybody else, never hugging you for too long or jokingly flirting to try and get on your nerves.
You weren’t exactly sure what it was about Heeseung that you liked so much. You’d seen him grow up the same as the other boys and while their changes annoyed you, scrunching your nose at classic boyish humor or lack of hygiene as they all shot up in height and their voices started cracking, Heeseung was the most beautiful person you’d ever met in your entire life.
He’d been born first out of all the babies but he never took advantage of being the eldest, always kind and generous as he drove everybody around and asked for group opinions instead of just doing whatever he wanted out of seniority.
He was funny in a way you didn’t know boys could be funny, not even meaning to make you laugh sometimes and just coincidentally being a beacon of light and humor that left all of you bending over trying to catch your breath at the dinner table. You liked this about him but you liked the small proud smile he’d have after everytime even more.
It certainly didn’t help that he was handsome in an unreal way. He had seemingly barely dipped a toe in the awkward phase you all went through before he was shooting up in height and his features were sharpening, solidifying into somebody who could’ve been intimidating if he wasn’t always smiling and goofing around.
But Heeseung was never your lover and he never would be considering your crush for him, that you had mistakenly spilled to Sunoo at some point during your senior year of high school, was completely dead and gone as far as you were concerned.
You’d even gotten a boyfriend to prove this to yourself, meeting a sophomore on your first day of college and immediately being taken by his style and humor. He reminded you of your friends back home as much as somebody could manage and he helped you adjust to being away from everyone outside of Sunoo. You’d even brought him back home with you last thanksgiving, letting him meet your friends before he abruptly dumped you on your drive back to the airport.
When you’d gotten out of the car with swollen eyes and red cheeks, your friends who had been waiting in the lobby to say the round of goodbyes had immediately crowded around you in worry.
Heeseung was standing back a bit and you tried not to make eye contact with him, humiliated as you murmured to them that Beomgyu had just broken up with you only a few minutes ago.
Jay was furious and attempting to go and confront the boy who was checking your bags in with security but Jungwon was quickly reminding him that you had to spend the next 4 hours sat right beside him on the cramped plane and they didn’t need to make the silence anymore uncomfortable than it already was going to be.
“I can drive you back.” Heeseung’s soft voice was coming from behind the bickering pair and you glanced up at him with wide teary eyes, not liking the pitiful gaze he was peering down at you with.
You felt sick at his suggestion as your heart skipped a few beats, the harsh reminder of how kind and generous he was immediately followed by the realization that no matter how hard your tried or how long of a relationship you had, he’d still make your stomach light up with butterflies. You turned down his offer and said your goodbyes with more tears than usual, promising to see them soon.
Heeseung hadn’t come to Christmas for the first time in your lives and as much fun as you had seeing each other again, the balance was always off whenever one of you weren’t present. He’d claimed he was busy with work and that he’d tried to get time off but he simply couldn’t, a message in the group chat about how he couldn’t wait to go camping being the last time you’d heard from him.
By the time Sunoo spoke again you could see him throwing his backpack over his shoulder and wheeling his suitcase out the door. “This could be the year you know. You should make a move.”
“Don’t be stupid.” You shook your head although he couldn’t see you anymore. “There is no move to be made, we’re bestfriends.”
“That’s because you- Hi Mrs L/N.” You could hear your front door open both through the phone speaker and your own ears. “Are too pussy to do anything about it.”
He whispered the last part so your mom wouldn’t hear and you laughed at the way he stopped mid insult to greet her with an affectionate tone. You hung up the phone and laid flat on your back as you waited for him to climb the stairs to your room.
He was pushing the door open only seconds later and he paused in the doorway when he saw you pathetically sprawled out in your own self pity, sighing softly before climbing on the bed besides your head and petting your hair gently as he kissed his teeth.
“Poor thing. In love with the village idiot.” He was shaking his head and you shoved his hand off of you as he let out a laugh, shielding himself from your attacks. You were sitting up to push him again when three long honks were ringing from outside, catching both of your attention.
You were off the bed and grabbing your bags before you could say another word, a childlike excitement washing over you as you giddily ran down the stairs and gave your mom a rushed kiss goodbye as she complained about the fact Jay had honked and didn’t come in to say hello.
By the time you got outside the other boys were already out of the car, meeting you halfway in laughed filled hugs and you and Sunoo ran to embrace them.
“Oh my god, when did you get so tall?” You were pulling away from Riki in exclamation as you held his arms and shook his frame slightly, scanning him all the way up to his face that was now having to look down at you. “What are they feeding you over there?”
“Straight protein.” Jake was answering before the youngest could, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and he also admired Riki’s growth spurt, although slightly envious considering he hadn’t grown much since high school.
“Protein won’t make you grow idiot.” Sunghoon was leaning against the van with a judging expression as he looked at his friend and roommate, him and Jake going to the same school about an hour away.
You’d stayed in pairs or groups for the most part since moving out. Sunoo and you, Jake and Sunghoon and then Jay, Jungwon and Riki had all moved in together at the best school in the state neighboring yours.
Heeseung was the only one who hadn’t applied alongside any of you despite the belief you all were going to try and stay together as much as possible while still supporting your individual dreams and wants. He had applied to all the same schools as you all did, getting accepted into every single one. Yet when it came down to choosing, he moved the furthest away on his own.
When he had sat you all down in Jungwon’s basement to announce this you remember feeling betrayed. Hurt at him leaving and even more upset that he hadn’t picked the school you were attending considering that was the option he seemed to be leaning towards according to what he told you
You can recall the others cheering in celebration at the fact he’d gotten into an extremely good college despite the sadness that settled in on everyone’s faces when they realized what that meant. You caught his eye at some point during that exchange and he flinched away, not wanting to look at you the same way you did to him at the airport.
Not similarly to the way he was looking at you now, rounding the front of the van as he got out of the passenger seat and made his way to where you were all gathered.
You tensed up for a moment when you first saw him and Riki noticed, following your gaze over his shoulder as he turned around and smiled once he saw what you were looking at, walking over to Heeseung and dragging him towards you with a pat on the back.
“Hey.” He was breathing out as he looked down at you and you took a second to take in his appearance.
It hadn’t been that long since you’d seen him but somehow he looked different, or maybe he just felt different considering how much broader his shoulders were and how much more sure of himself he seemed. You weren’t exactly sure what it was about him that was striking you as new but you were momentarily stunned as you took him in.
Sunoo was nudging you with him elbow suddenly and you realized you’d been completely zoned out checking Heeseung out as you ignored his greeting. “Hi Hee.”
He smiled down at you softly but didn’t say anything else, just standing there for a second before Jay was smacking the hood of the old van and announcing you had to hit the road or else you’d miss the site check in time. You gave him a quick glance before moving to carry your bags into the trunk, stopping when big hands were overlapping yours on the handle.
“Let me do it.” You looked up from under your eyelashes to see Heeseung bending over slightly as he gathered your stuff for you.
You were too stunned to say anything and he smiled again, fuller this time as he turned with your stuff and started to load it up. Sunoo was chuckling from beside you and you whipped your head to the side to shoot him a glare, a silent warning for him to be quiet and not draw attention to the blush on your face or the fact your stomach was lighting up with the same familiar feeling it always did whenever you were around the oldest boy.
The ride was uneventful for the most part, three hours passing as the boys in front of you caught up and told childish jokes, at one point having a competition to see who could catch the most goldfish in their mouth before they were gagging.
Heeseung hadn’t joined in with them from his seat in front of you but you could see his cheeks rising with a smile every time Sunoo squeaked out a laugh or Riki started to tease Jay who was driving. You and Sunghoon were in the back, playing games on his phone as you passed it back and forth and tried to ignore the eyes you could feel looking back at you every once in a while.
You were all just starting to reach your boredom limit and the car was filling with groans of pain as you stretched your legs out onto others and complained about your back pain, when you finally were pulling up to the familiar area.
As you shuffled out of the van, you took a deep breath and squeezed your eyes shut. It was rare to find this type of visual anywhere you were used to, the large trees surrounding the clear lake with small mountains out in the distance.
The air felt clear and light in your lungs and the temperature was perfect, just hot enough that you could go swimming still but also bundle into a sweater to avoid getting an overwhelming amount of bug bites.
You helped unload the trunk with the others, setting up the grills and coolers in a small area a few feet away from the main camp site. It was empty now, a small lot of perfectly mowed grass but you’d seen the process enough times to know with only a little bit of work, it could turn into a comfortable home for you to spend the weekend. Jake helped you moved some of the heavier stuff, giggling when he almost tripped over a branch walking backwards.
“Here comes the worst part.” He was leaning over to whisper to you as you walked back to camp.
Jay was sitting on the picnic table the campsite offered to people who stayed multiple nights, the hat he had been wearing in his hands as Sunoo ripped up little pieces of paper next to him.
Jake was right in the sense that this was the most meticulous part of the weekend but you never completely minded it. Your names would all be written on a piece of paper and put into the hat, then you’d draw two at a time and be given your tent roommate for the trip. Sunghoon and Jake often got paired and he’s complain the entire time, citing him as a blanket hog.
For 90% of the years you’d done this tradition you’d gotten Sunoo, eventually you imagined it had something to do with the fact he was the one who always got to call out the names being pulled.
Nobody ever called him out for it despite the way they’d roll their eyes as he put on a show of surprise, gasping and covering his mouth in shock and you laughed and cheered him on. So you weren’t thinking too much about the mischievous look on his face, figuring he was just planning out how his performance was going to go this time around.
“Okay first up to bat.” Jay was calling out in a serious tone, shuffling the slips around now that they were all accounted for.
“Jake.” Sunoo was announcing as he pulled the first one out, unfolding it and showcasing it slowly to your eager eyes. Jake nudged your side with an excited look on his face, crossing his fingers and squeezing his eyes shut in anticipation. “And…. Sunghoon!”
“Oh no fucking way.” The boy next to you was groaning loudly as he dropped to his knees dramatically, holding his head and trying to block out the sounds of Sunghoon laughing and cheering as he mocked him.
You laughed with him, looking at Sunoo who winked at you and bunched the papers up in his hands. You bent down to wrap your arms under Jake’s arms, tugging him back up to a standing position as he dramatically leaned against you.
Sunghoon was excitedly skipping over to the two of you, face lit up with pleasure at the sound of his friends complaints. He helped you hold up Jake who had gone completely limp as he feigned death. “Hurry up, he’s heavy.”
“Alright next up is…” Sunoo paused dramatically like he was waiting for a drum roll, sighing and muttering how you guys weren’t any fun when nobody humored him. “Jungwon and Sunoo.”
Jungwon let out a cheer and a swift clap, although not moving from where he was lounging in a camping chair beside the picnic table. Sunoo gave you another look, the same mischievous grin on his face that he had before, although now it made your blood run cold as you quickly realized what he was attempting to do.
“Riki and Jay.” You were proven right as the third pair was announced and you stiffened up completely in shock and betrayal, not even paying attention to the two boys and they agreed they were going to get the best and biggest tent since Riki was the tallest.
“Looks like it’s me and you.” To make your situation worse, Heeseung’s low voice was suddenly hitting your ear and you turned to glance at him.
He looked slightly awkward, not nearly as awkward as you were feeling, and you felt a wave a guilt at the fact he had most likely saw your upset reaction. You hoped he just figured it was because you liked to be close with Sunoo, although right now you were considering drowning him in the lake, and didn’t think it had anything to do with him.
“Looks like it.” You gave him a tensed smile knowing it absolutely everything to do with him.
——
The day was so fun you were almost able to forget your unfortunate sleeping situation. Everybody had gone down to the lake the second the tents were properly set up and secured into the ground, greeting familiar campers who lived on site full time during the summers and splashing each other aggressively until somebody was screaming and blowing water out of their nose.
It exhausted you fast and you were back at the camp only a few hours later so you could conserve your energy, watching Jay and thanking him as he grilled enough meat for all of you to eat multiple servings.
Now the sun had set and your first night was coming to an end in the most peaceful way possible, listening to your best friends have low voiced talks around a crackling campfire. You weren’t saying much but you liked to hear them tell stories about their months apart from you and drink in their voices that you had missed so dearly.
“Shit just changes in college.” Riki was mumbling and you watched him with tired eyes, nodding your head as he spoke about how he’s felt slightly out of place now that he was away from home.
“That’s because everybody is either having sex or trying to.” Jake was remarking from beside you and you turned to glare at him.
He was playing with the dangling netted cup holder of your foldable chair and you slapped his hand away at his statement, causing him to chuckle and nudge you with his foot as he shrugged. “Hey, it’s true.”
“Not for everybody.” Sunghoon was shaking his head and giving him the same grossed out look you were. He was sat across from you and he glanced at you from behind the fire with a nod of agreement. “Some of us have better stuff to do than go to parties every weekend and dick off.”
Jake was scoffing in disbelief and you watched Sunghoon shoot him a pointed look like he was telling him to keep quiet, your mouth dropping into a surprised laugh at the fact he had tried to lie and pretend to agree with you.
“Don’t let her fool you, she complains about her virginity every other day.” Sunoo was casually saying as he took a sip of his drink, his head tilting back to finish it and missing the reaction from the group.
It had fallen completely silent and you stiffened up awkwardly in your chair, a wave of embarrassment washing over you at your friends blunt phrasing. He had always been known to tell the truth about anything and everything but he seemed to realize this was too far, even for him, putting his cup down slowly and offering you an apologetic grimace.
“What?” Jake was sitting up in his chair and turning to fully face you, leaning forward and tugging on your sleeve with an urgent look on his face. “You’ve never had sex?”
“Dude you were with Beomgyu for like 3 years.” Jungwon was muttering from a few spots over and you glared in his direction at the mention of your ex boyfriend.
“Eight months.” The voice from the other seat beside you was speaking for the first time in a while and you turned your gaze slowly to see Heeseung stiff in his chair, staring into the fire as he played with his empty cup absentmindedly. You wondered if he even realized he had said something, let alone suddenly announced the exact amount of time you’d been in a relationship.
“Regardless dude, weren’t you guys like super serious?” Riki was adding on and you looked over to him, happy no one else had realized how weird what Heeseung had said was.
Despite how open you all were with each other, it was rare the conversation about sex lives ever extended over to you. As much as you didn’t really mind the idea of talking to them about your experiences, or lack there of, you also weren’t totally oppose to them never asking and you never telling.
You would’ve laughed at the fact they all looked personally offended you hadn’t gotten laid, maybe even joined in on the banter, if it wasn’t for the boy next to you and how embarrassing it was for him to be hearing it all. As much as you wished you thought of Heeseung the same as the other boys, you didn’t and this proved it.
“It’s not a big deal guys… he never tried or anything. I didn’t think much about it.” You were flushed bright red, thankfully hidden underneath the dark night, and shaking your head as you tried to feign casualness.
“Not a big deal?” Jake was laughing in disbelief and leaning forward more so you’d fully understand the sincerity in his words. “He was with YOU for almost a year and never made a move? He’s crazy.”
You were turning to glare at him at his wording and he leaned back a few inches, keeping a hand on your chair.
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” You groaned as you realized this wasn’t something they were going to just let go and move on from, being presented with the most interesting conversation point of the night.
“You’re hot.” He said it like it was something obvious and clear and you faltered in shock, mouth parting and you leaned forward to smack him on the shoulder. He winced and flinched away from you with an upset whine. “I’m just saying dude! We all think it.”
You turned away from him to scan the rest of the circle with wide eyes and furrowed eyebrows, watching the other boys awkwardly avoid your gaze or just outwardly nod their heads in agreement with Jake. (Sunghoon and Jay.)
You weren’t stupid and you knew the boys were attractive, each of them fit and handsome constantly drawing attention all throughout high school, subjecting you to glares from girls in the hallways and boys trying to befriend you in an attempt to get closer to them.
Still, you’d never considered the fact that they thought about you in a similar way. You never thought too deeply into your own appearance at all, both positively and negatively but you figured the idea would never cross their minds considering they strictly treated you as a close friend or even a sibling at times, minus Jake and his meaningless flirting.
For some reason your gaze fell to Heeseung, who was still completely stiff beside you. He hadn’t been looking at you before but now he was and you faltered slightly at the hard expression on his face, eyes low with something you couldn’t make out in the dark.
“Shut up Jake, don’t be so stupid.” You were turning away from him quickly as you muttered the words and they dropped it quickly the second they realized you were actually uncomfortable and not just messing around.
The conversation moved on for now but you imagined they’d bring it back up at some point during the weekend. You felt a bit better now that the attention was mostly off of you, Jake’s hand resting on your arm as he played with your sleeve softly. You figured he must be feeling guilty for making such a big deal out of it so you ignored him, happily accepting the invitation to go to bed when Jungwon was standing with a yawn.
The awkwardness of that conversation had made you complete forgot about your sleeping situation but you were reminded quickly as the other boys stood to also head to bed, Heeseung standing slowly and hovering near you.
He followed behind you closely as you ducked into the tent but neither of you spoke as you zipped it up, sitting down on the sleeping back to shuffle through your bag as you searched for your pajamas.
You felt bad it was so awkward between the two of you. You’d always felt more cautious around him considering your past crush but you never let it show, not wanting him to think you liked him less than the others or worse, realize the truth was the direct opposite. Still there was something clearly different in their air now and it was suffocating you a bit as you waited for him to joke around or say something stupid to break the tension.
“Are you into Jake?” When he finally spoke it threw you off completely, not expecting him to say something like in such a hardened tone.
You froze in your movements inside your bag, looking up at him in confusion. “What?”
He was halfway sat leaning against a few pillows, watching you from the other side of the tent with that same unreadable expression he had by the fire. He didn’t clarify what he said, knowing you had heard him and you watched him for a few seconds in silent bewilderment.
“Why would you ask me that?” You mumbled, shaking your head and looking down at your disorganized clothes pile again. It slightly agitated you that he hadn’t spoken to you for most of the day and yet that was the first question from his mouth.
“Just wondering.” He shrugged like it wasn’t a completely taboo topic to be questioning you about but his face was anything but casual. “Are you into any of them? Would you hook up with one of us?”
“How can you ask me that? Would you ask one of the boys that or is it because I’m the only girl?” You glared at him as you spoke.
“I’d ask them if I cared.” He stated and you scoffed, not fully understanding what he was attempting to imply in his statement.
He wasn’t acting like himself and you felt a bit worried that maybe you had done something to upset him or weirded him out with your awkward demeanor. You didn’t bother to reply again, grabbing your toothbrush with the pajamas you’d chosen and leaving the tent swiftly through the zippered door.
You were speed walking down towards the public bathrooms and showers on the other side of the camp site, flustered from his random interrogation and replaying the day to decide if you’d done anything that could make him think that.
Jake was touchy with everybody, especially you at times since you objected the least but he always had been and it definitely wasn’t a new and shocking thing for him to be touching your arm or hugging onto your side. You contemplated it potentially being due to his comment about you being hot but considering the context in which he said it, you didn’t think that was the reason.
A hand around your arm was snapping you from your thoughts and you let out a small yelp, spinning around to see Heeseung who was panting slightly.
His eyes were wide a bit like he was worried and you saw a flash of guilt pass through then when he saw your flushed face. He squeezed your arm for a second before letting it go and you gave him a questioning stare at the fact he had seemingly rushed out of the tent to follow you into the darkness.
“Let me walk you there.” He blurred out and gestured to the fact he was also holding his pajamas and night hygiene products. “It’s dark, you shouldn’t be out here alone.”
You scoffed slightly at his concern, both of you knowing you weren’t in any danger at the campsite and it was barely a ten minute walk through a lit trail, but nonetheless you nodded at him and continued walking with him now at your side. He didn’t say anything else and neither did you, parting ways silently once you got to the building and he went to the male side.
You took a second to breathe once inside, leaning your elbows on the counter and looking at yourself in the mirror underneath the yellow flickering lights. You brushed your teeth quickly and changed into a comfortable sweater and shorts, wandering back outside to see Heeseung already there and leaning against the wall.
He watched as you walked past him silently, lingering for a second before jogging to catch up with you.
“I’m sorry.” He was muttering and you looked at him for a second before focusing back in front of you so you didn’t trip over the bumpy terrain. “I shouldn’t have asked you that.”
You shrugged softly and you felt his arm bump into yours as you walked side by side, approaching the tent in silence. You didn’t want to talk about it anymore, certainly not wanting to hear the reason he thought you’d be hooking up with Jake of all people.
When you finally were back inside and putting your toothbrush away you tried to ignore the fact he was climbing onto the large sleeping bag waiting for you to join inside it before he could zip it up completely. Your heart was pounding thinking about sleeping next to him and you suddenly felt overly hot despite the cold chill of the night.
You’d slept next to Heeseung before, all accustomed to sharing beds or living room floors during sleepovers, sometimes even all smushing together inside Jungwon’s van when you had a particularly long late night adventure. Yet it felt extremely intimate to be alone together and zipped up inside a sleeping bag.
Still you had no other option and the cold was starting to get to you considering your pajama shorts, so you scooted over onto the staticky fabric and held your breath as he leaned over you to seal it.
He laid back onto his back and you fell into more silence, not quite touching but you could feel his shoulder only a few inches from yours, rising and falling as he took deep breaths. He was shifting a bit to try and get comfortable and directly bumped into you, freezing at the contact but not making any move to scoot further away.
“I really am sorry for asking you that.” He was suddenly speaking but his voice was so quiet you barely heard him at first, a tired rasp lacing his words.
“It’s fine Hee. Not a big deal.” You whispered back, the air feeling strangely delicate. His hand was touching your wrist randomly but you assumed it was an accident, sparing him a glance at his touch and finding him staring at the roof of the tent.
“Pissed me off when he said that.” His voice was still low but it was hardening again like it had earlier and you winced slightly, confused at his mood changes. Heeseung was never the type to get angry and definitely not somebody who would voice it so openly like this. “Is that weird to say?”
“I’m not sure I get what you mean.” You were bending your legs so your feet were flat against the tent floor and your knees were pointed upwards, feeling strangely vulnerable at the conversation topic.
His hand that was barely grazing your wrist was moving now and you stiffened when he completely grasped it, sliding slowly down your arm until he could feel your palm under his finger tips. You sucked in a breath at his strange actions, never really directly touching him before despite how close you all were to each other.
“I don’t think I know what I mean either.” He was letting out a small self deprecating laugh but he squeezed your hand now that they were intertwined. “I just know whenever he touches you it makes me feel crazy.”
Your heart felt heavy at his sudden confession and you were slightly dizzy as you were trying to process what he was saying and what it meant if he was implying what you thought he might be. It seemed like he was trying to tell you that he was jealous of Jake, jealous of him for touching you earlier and for the way he playfully flirted.
“Jake’s harmless.” You whispered back and you’re not sure why that’s what you chose to address instead of asking him why on earth that would upset him.
“I know.” He said it like he was frustrated, like you were missing the point he was trying to make. “It’s not about that, I don’t know forget it.”
He was unraveling his hand from yours but you instinctively caught him in the middle of his arm, panicked at the thought of him pulling away now that you’ve finally made some progress towards… something you still weren’t fully understanding. But you’d never even toed the line with Heeseung before and you weren’t going to take it for granted.
He was finally glancing at you now that you were practically hugging his arm and his face wasn’t hard anymore, instead having a nervous unsure look that you hadn’t really seen on him before.
“Help me understand.” You loosened your grip on his arm but kept it held against you, breathing heavier as you looked at each other.
He watched you for a while but didn’t say anything just yet, you tried not to flinch when he rolled over on his side so he could face you better and it seemed to work considering his free hand was coming up to push some of your hair behind your ear, resting on your cheek for a second before going back to his side like he hadn’t meant to do it.
“Why did you never have sex with Beomgyu?” He was whispering again and his words sounded particularly vulgar although he sounded like he was genuinely curious.
You didn’t answer for a while because you honestly didn’t have one that wouldn’t make you sound like you were desperate and insane. You could halfway lie and tell him it just didn’t feel right but you had a feeling he would be able to see right through you like he always could.
“It didn’t work right?” He started speaking again before you could and you were turning on your side too so you could look at him in confusion, still holding his arm that was resting in the middle of you. When he saw your confused look he explained further. “Using him to get over me, it didn’t work.”
You froze and your mouth fell open, almost worried you were going to cry considering how embarrassed you felt that he had apparently known your biggest secret this entire time. A sick feeling washed over you and he seemed to notice because he shifted closer to you slightly with a worried expression.
You thought back to how Heeseung had acted on the trip you’d brought your ex boyfriend to. He was more distant than usual but you figured he was just busy and stressed since he had been working so hard, this being confirmed when he couldn’t get time off to attend Christmas.
Now a large part of you was wondering if it was something else, if he had lied so he didn’t have to face you after your breakup. If Jake, somebody he knew and trusted, flirting with you had bothered him tonight then there was no way he hadn’t been even slightly upset considering you and Beomgyu were openly affectionate the entire break.
You tried to not blame yourself for the fact he had missed out on movie night that week, citing he wasn’t feeling well and barely sparing a glance to the two of you curled up together under a blanket on the couch. Remembering how he stared at you over dinner when you were introducing the boy with a bright smile on your face, avoiding his heavy gaze all night because it made your heart feel guilty.
It also made you feel incredibly stupid. Not only did he seem to know you were in love with him but he also determined your entire reasoning for rushing into a relationship.
“You knew?” Your hurt was shown clearly in your tone and his eyes saddened a little.
“Of course I knew, I thought we both did.” He shook his head a little like he was finding himself stupid. “Imagine my surprise when you come home with a boyfriend.”
“You left.” You spat out to him, squeezing his arm at the reminder he had willingly moved farther away from you than anybody else. Despite the fact you’d spent multiple nights together talking about the colleges you’d choose and he assured you he wouldn’t go far if he didn’t pick the one you were set on.
“I had to.” He sounded pained and stressed out like it had been weighing on him and your heart clenched considering you knew exactly how he felt.
As frustrated as you were at the situation you imagined it would’ve been hard for him too, having feelings for you the same way you did but never being sure. You definitely did your best to hide it to keep your friendship steady since it was your priority and you tried to think about how hurt you would be if he suddenly brought a girlfriend to your holidays, stomach turning at the thought.
“I am over you.” You said it forcefully as you tried to salvage any bit of friendship that was left but neither of you believed the words you were saying, his eyebrow raising as he watched you with a curious expression.
“Yeah?” He was mumbling and you squeezed his arm instinctively at his deepened tone and the way his voice quirked up in a question. You nodded your head and hummed softly in agreement, standing behind your claim.
He was shifting closer again and your nose bumped against his, causing you to suck in a sharp breath.
You tried not to think about the fact this was the closest you’d ever been to him, tried not to think about how he basically just confessed to you and taken almost two decades worth of weight off your shoulders. You especially tried not to think about the fact his eyes were flicking down to your lips every few seconds.
You didn’t think about anything at all when he was finally kissing you, closing your eyes immediately and leaning into each other like this was something you did often. Despite how constant you’d thought about what it would be like to kiss him one day, you were still surprised by how natural it felt.
It didn’t make you nervous to lean into him, not even when he let out a small huffy groan when he rolled onto his back so you could be laying halfway on top of him.
Something about kissing Heeseung came naturally to you and he seemed to be thinking similarly considering the way he let out a small relieved sigh when you pulled away to breathe, big hands coming up to tangle in your hair and hold your face still above his as he studied your swollen lips and dazed expression.
He gave you a soft smile and your lips quirked up at the sight of it, feeling content and happy despite your stomach lighting up with those familiar butterflies, leaning back down to kiss him again before you wasted any more time.
feelings for you | choi soobin

summary: after catching his roommate and his girlfriend making out, Choi Soobin’s life has been in an awkward standstill where he can’t decide if he should still be upset or move on. never one for confrontation, he still works with his ex girlfriend whose suddenly interested in him again all because he’s shown interest in another girl—his new roommate.
➣genre/au: roommate!soobin x roommate!y/n [she/her. female anatomy]
➣19.3k words
warnings: smut. kinda fluff. soobin is a barista. college grads. oc is soobin’s new roommate. one instant of fake dating. soobin is a whiny drunk. soobin’s cheating ex tries to get him back. soobin and oc friends. cute soobin but he’s a switch. dom soobin in the bedroom. soobin doesn’t like confrontation until the end. oral sèx [f receiving, in the kitchen 🤭] protected sèx. missionary. riding. soobin is subby post-sex. he has an unexplored boob kink. big soobin. jealous soobin but only slightly
When it comes to drama, you want no part of it. You keep your circle small and try not to involve yourself with things that don’t concern you but it’s been hard now that you’ve moved in with your new roommate. Originally, you thought it would be less drama to have a guy you didn’t know as a roommate, aside from the obvious worries Soobin had seemed perfect.
He was quiet and a bit shy but he seemed to have good intentions. You’ve heard him through the thin walls and he laughs when he watches something funny or talks on the phone but he’s not obnoxiously loud. He cleans up after himself and gives you your space so this first week has been good.
You’ve recently started rooming together when you answered his ad in search of a roommate and you’re starting to understand why he was looking for one in the first place.
“So she just dumped you?” You asked, unable to help yourself from being nosy. This is the first time since your first meeting that you’re sharing a conversation with him and it’s about his past relationship—evidently to thank for giving you a room for cheap.
“Basically,” Soobin said with a shrug as he stared at the television where his Nintendo Switch was connected. He was currently playing some Jujutsu Kaisen game that managed to grab your attention when you had come out of your cave for a bowl of cereal.
“That’s crazy,” you mumbled to yourself, turning away from him to wash your dishes in the sink.
Apparently, his last roommate moved out very suddenly considering he slept with Soobin’s girlfriend and things just didn’t work out.
“It’s whatever,” Soobin said, so hyper focused on his game, and saying whatever was on his mind with no attention at all, “Just sucks because I still have to work with her.”
“Wait!” You dropped what you were doing, rushing over to where he was and standing in front of the tv, “So you’re saying you still have to see your cheating ex girlfriend who slept with your roommate at work?”
“Yeah,” Soobin said, making you shake your head in disbelief. Still thinking about his sheer bad luck, you finally left him to his game and retreated to your bedroom to wallow in self pity like usual.
It was all too much to talk about for Soobin. His relationship only lasted about six months but he still can’t believe she slept with his roommate. He thought they all had become good friends but to find out she’s secretly going to his roommate’s bedroom while he’s at work. She would come over and stay while he would leave to work and while he thought she was waiting for him to get home, she’s letting his roommate stick it to her! The audacity, honestly, to do that in his home is ridiculous but thankfully his name was the one on the lease and he got to kick the guy out.
At first it was strange to have a girl move in with him considering he’s only ever roomed with guys and he was supposed to be in his ‘I Hate Woman’ era but you’ve turned out to be better than he expected. Of course it’s only been a few days but you both seem to be hyper aware of the fact that this is something new for the both of you. At least he won’t have to worry about you sleeping with his next girlfriend… or does he?
For another hour or so, Soobin played his game, completely engrossed that not even the pounding on the door for two solid minutes broke him from his trance. It wasn’t until you stormed out of your bedroom once again and headed right to the front door did he realize the person at the door was here for him.
You looked at the guy in front of you, a bit stunned to speak at how attractive he was and for a moment the two of you just stood there looking stupefied. The guy took a step back into the hallway and read the number on the wall which was sure enough his best friend’s apartment.
“What are you doing here?” Soobin asked, suddenly appearing behind you with a hand on the door above your head. Once you acknowledged that this stranger was here for your roommate you quietly made your leave, unaware of the new pair of eyes trailing after you.
“There you go, I didn’t know you had it in you to bounce back so fast,” Yeonjun said, looking to your closed door, “And with a baddie at that!”
“What are you talking about? She’s my new roommate,” Soobin said letting his best friend follow him to his bedroom so the two of them wouldn’t be in the living room and possibly make you uncomfortable. “And what are you doing here?”
“I came to cheer you up, I know its been a rough two weeks and I didn’t want you to think I left you at your lowest,” Yeonjun said, flopping himself down on the beanbag in the corner of Soobin’s room. He reached into his backpack and pulled out a couple bottles of Soju. Soobin released a sigh as he checked the time and read how late it was, “First of all it’s a weekday, second I’m not at my lowest.”
“Right… that’s the Denial stage of grief, don’t worry friend, you don’t have to lie to me, I know you,” Yeonjun said as he got up once again and went to the door, “Remember when you lost Odi? You cried for three weeks straight—“
“That is different! Odi was the real love of my life so don’t compare this to the heartbreak I felt for my beloved child!” Soobin yelled but Yeonjun just brushed him off to leave the kitchen and find glasses—and also hopefully run into you again.
Once he was back in the room, Soobin was sniffing Odi’s old blanket for comfort.
“So are you saying your roommate is up for grabs because she really is hot,” Yeonjun asked, beginning to pour two shot glasses with peach flavored Soju. Soobin shrugged his shoulders, “I don’t know and considering what happened with my last roommate, I’m not really into inner circle mixing with my friends and roommate.”
“Fair enough.”
Fresh out of school, you’ve been lucky enough to find a small job at the lowest ranking possible while still being in the world of fashion. There certainly are better things you could be doing besides running errands for your boss but as a new college grad with no experience, its not like you could expect more in the fashion world. It honestly wasn’t too bad and your boss wasn’t one of those horrendous bosses that paged their employee at all hours of the day and the pay was good enough to keep a roof over your head so there wasn’t much to complain about.
You surprisingly do have quite a bit of freedom and don’t always feel tied to your work so you’re thankful that you have time to visit your friends. Now that none of you are in school its become harder to fit time to see each other in your schedules but today you got lucky to finish a shoot early and you were able to get off sooner than usual.
Seeing Soobin’s friend the other night worked as a reminder to tell you you’re not a loser and actually have friends to visit too and that’s how you found yourself sitting next to your friend while he played Overwatch at a public game room.
Your computer screen had gone back to sleep mode after you got tired of making random SIMs characters and resorted to spinning in the rolling chair next to him. It was alright for a while but when it had been almost a full hour of this, you couldn’t take it anymore, “When you asked to hang out, I thought we would actually be doing something fun.”
“This is fun, what are you talking about?” Beomgyu asked, eyes locked on the screen making you roll your eyes. You’ve been friends since your freshman year of college so his need to pay more attention to his games than you isn’t a surprise but it is annoying—even though your roommate was kind of the same.
When you didn’t say anything, Beomgyu tried harder, “So hows the new living situation?”
“It’s alright, he seems cool and it’s cheap,” You told him, still spinning absentmindedly.
Beomgyu nodded, “Is he a weirdo? Like do I have to worry about you popping up on a missing persons ad?”
“I hope not, but let me share my location with you just in case,” you joked making him chuckle, “But honestly, he seems like a good guy. It was kind of weird at first since it all seemed rushed so i was obviously worried but he explained why and its all good now”
“Spill the tea, why was he in a hurry to find a roommate?” Beomgyu asked, visibly more interested in your story than before, but still gaming.
“His girlfriend slept with his roommate when he was at work,” You said making Beomgyu gasp dramatically.
“Whoa, what a bitch,” he said, “I would’ve fought my roommate.”
“And you would’ve lost too,” you said to him making him kick your chair causing it to roll back a bit. Your laughter began to slowly die down when you felt the vibrations of your ringing cellphone. You checked the caller, surprised to see the man in question’s name on your screen.
“Hello?”
“Have I ever told you you’re the best roommate I’ve ever had?” Immediately you were taken back by the brightness in his voice. He was obviously being dramatic and you could practically hear the favor he’s going to ask.
“Well it’s not like I have a lot of competition, right?” You asked, hearing the line go silent for a moment making you wonder if you shouldn’t have said that.
Soobin rolled his eyes but wasn’t mad, “Right… So can you do me a favor? I have to meet up with some friends right after work but my phone is about to die and I don’t have a charger. Is there any way you can bring one to my work?”
You thought about it for a moment, “Nobody has one you can borrow?”
“Yes, but there’s no way I’m asking her for it,” he said with an annoyed sigh. He’s already asked everyone and they’ve all pointed him to his ex girlfriend, “Please?”
You looked back at Beomgyu who started playing his game again, forgetting you were even beside him and with a shrug Soobin couldn’t see, you said, “I guess, I’ll be there in a bit.”
Soobin’s attempt to thank you was cut short when you hung up abruptly but he was too relieved to care and tucked his phone back into his pocket.
“Want me to ask Jia if you could borrow it?” His coworker asked when Soobin got back to the counter. He shook his head, “I’ve got someone bringing one.”
He couldn’t believe he forgot his charger and didn’t realize it until he was halfway through his shift with only 15% battery. When he went to the break room in search of his charger, he nearly lost his shit when he couldn’t find it.
At first he hoped his work bestie, Taehyun, would have one but he didn’t and the only other person to ask was his ex. Obviously he wasn’t going to ask her and although he could try and run home after his shift, unless he were to find an outlet at the place he was going with his friends, his phone would be dead anyway.
Soobin’s last resort was to see if there was any way you could just bring it to him. He left it on the entrance table and must have forgot it when he was putting his shoes on and ran out. He was pleasantly surprised that you said yes and it was such a huge relief that he wouldn’t have to ask Jia.
When you walked into the coffee shop you were immediately surrounded by warmth and the smell of espresso beans. It was the first time you ever stepped foot into this cafè but it was calm and aesthetically pleasing, somewhere you can talk with friends or do some work. You followed the scent to the front register where a girl with blonde highlights stood with a polite smile on her face.
With wandering eyes toward the menu above her head, you asked, “Is Soobin here?”
You didn’t notice how that smile fell as she looked at you a little closer and before she could even respond, your roommate came out from behind some door holding a bag of hot to-go cups.
Once Soobin saw you, his heart unintentionally leapt in relief and he quickly set the bag down to go to you. A shy smile spread across his lips, very happy you actually came, “You brought it?”
“Yes,” you said, moving to the side of the counter and closer to where he was, beginning to look through your bag for it. Soobin had his hands on the counter waiting patiently as you two stood a few feet away from where his ex was. “But it wasn’t by the door, you left it on the bed.”
You felt a little awkward to go to his room but he left the door open and you could see it on the bed. Now, you could’ve easily just leant him yours so you wouldn’t invade his privacy but you weren’t going to risk him forgetting it.
“I did?” Soobin asked with a somewhat cute tilt of his head, “Oops, I swear I left it by the door, thanks though.”
When you handed it to him, your hands accidentally touched but neither one of you thought much about it, unaware of the people behind the counter watching the interaction.
“Do you want a drink?” Soobin asked, the least he could do is give you a free drink in thanks plus when he came out he saw you eyeing the menu.
“Sure,” you looked at the menu once again before just saying, “Surprise me.”
Soobin nodded with a smile as he got to making it while you looked down at the pastries in the dessert case.
By the time he was done and gave you the drink, you were ready to leave but before you could, he said, “I won’t be home till late.”
He just meant to give you a heads up that way you knew you had the apartment to yourself and didn’t think about how it would sound to the others.
You left with a goodbye and thanks for the drink and he was left behind to deal with his ex for another three hours.
“So who was that?” Taehyun asked, suddenly popping up beside him, catching him off guard and making him scream. Soobin clutched his chest in an attempt to calm his racing heart as he looked at his friend with a dumb expression, “Who?”
Taehyun couldn’t even pretend to be amused and asked again, “The person who you were talking to like ten seconds ago.”
“Oh! That’s Y/n, she’s my new roommate,” Soobin said casually with a shrug of his shoulders.
“That’s it? I thought you had moved on already, I was impressed,” Taehyun said with a chuckle as Soobin rinsed out the froth pitcher, “I think Jia got a little worried there for a second.”
Soobin stopped as he tried to process what his friend was saying, “What do you mean?”
“I’m not gonna lie it kind of looked like the two of you had something going on at first and Jia asked me if I knew her,” Taehyun told him confidently. Jia left on her break without telling either one of them but now they’re comfortably talking without her around.
“It shouldn’t matter to her anyway,” Soobin muttered under his breath as he moved past Taehyun to help the customer in line. Why does it matter to Jia who he talks to and why does she feel the need to ask Taehyun what he knows? She cheated on him. She betrayed his trust so heavily that he doubts she ever truly cared about him so why is she acting interested or concerned?
Does it bother her to see him talking to someone despite everything she’s done?
It was a couple days later when he realized your short visit to his work which should have been in the past, wasn’t.
Like the other night, he was stuck working with Jia and he had been counting every minute that passed until the end of his shift since it started. For hours they worked and talked around each other but never intercepted even when he could feel her eyes on him.
When they closed the cafè and Soobin was ready to run home and escape her presence, she decided to speak up, “Soobin?”
For a second he debated ignoring her so he could walk straight to the bus stop and not worry about seeing her for the rest of the night. It was hard to always act unaffected as if she didn’t completely disintegrate his entire confidence and practically shove new insecurities, he never wanted to show, down his throat.
Taking a deep breath, he turned to her wordlessly, waiting to see what she had to say.
“I…” she bit her lip trying to figure out how to word her thoughts, “I… um, I just wanted to know how you were doing.”
He resisted the urge to scoff as he answered questioning, “I’m good?”
For the past few weeks he’s worked hard to act like he didn't catch Jia and his roommate kissing on his couch so why was she wanting to know now of all times?
As much as he wanted to go home, part of him wanted to see what was up. Jia met his eyes, still taken back to see his harsh gaze which was a huge contrast than the gentle stare she had grown used to in the last six months.
“That’s good,” Jia cleared her throat awkwardly, “Are you, b-by chance seeing anyone?”
The obvious look of disbelief on Soobin’s face had her rushing to explain, “I mean… the person who came to visit you the other night. Is she, yknow, are you seeing her?”
“You mean Y/n?” Soobin asked with a tilt of his head. Why was she asking about you?
Jia stood there silently trying to figure out what to say next. What was her point? What was she trying to find out by asking him that? Had she expected him to still be mourning their relationship? Does she have a right to feel worried that he’s moved on so quickly after what she did?
Before she could even try to word a shitty excuse for why she asked in the first place, Soobin had already stopped paying attention to her when he got a text.
you: ordered too much pizza
you: I’ll die if I eat more
you: pls take some
For some reason your sequence of texts brought a slight smile on his face. He put a thumbs up on the message and looked at Jia, “Night.”
He left her standing there alone as he ran home to his roommate who was slowly beginning to like more and more. He doesn’t even mean it romantically because clearly now’s not the best time for him but he likes you as a roommate and possible friend? You’ve slowly begun to help each other out and you don’t completely avoid shared spaces so you’ve been interacting a little more. He wouldn’t call you a friend just yet but you’re an easy person to live with and he doesn’t have that many people around him so it’s nice talking to you either way.
The two of you text here and there but never about anything important, usually you ask how to fix the hot water and he sends you anime reels he thinks you might enjoy. If he’s up for it, he’ll ask if you want any pastries he’s supposed to throw out.
It’s a very simple arrangement and he much preferred being with you than suffering another second with Jia where he risked asking her every question he had on why he wasn’t good enough.
It’s a very simple arrangement and he much preferred being with you than suffering another second with Jia where he risked asking her every question he had on why he wasn’t good enough.
By the time Soobin got home, you had moved from the dining room to the couch where you engrossed yourself into some animated movie laying on your side. You barely raised your head to acknowledge him but he smiled anyway as he headed to the kitchen, “Thanks for sharing.”
“No problem, I overestimated how much I could eat in one setting,” You mumbled in a tired, raspy tone, “How was work?”
Soobin didn’t bother heating up his slice, or even get a plate, and he took a big bite out of the cold pizza, walked out the kitchen to talk, “It was alright, kinda slow aside from some teens who wouldn’t stop giggling at me.”
“Question, was that girl from the other night your ex or someone else?” You asked sitting up a bit when you noticed he was trying to sit down.
“Yeah that’s her, Jin, she also asked about you tonight,” Soobin said seeing it as a joke, “Taehyun said she seemed jealous when I was talking to you.”
Your brows furrowed with confusion, “Did you tell her I was your roommate?”
He shook his head, taking a moment to chew before saying, “No, I didn’t see why it mattered.”
“True, that’s so weird,” You released a sigh, resting your elbow on the arm rest and leaning your head on your hand, “Wow, no offense but your ex girlfriend is a bitch.”
He couldn’t hide the look of surprise on his face as you said that but he couldn’t disagree—he just would’ve used kinder words. It was kind of funny though and for some reason hearing you say that made him feel better. His other friends who know about it don’t really ask and they don’t explicitly tell him to his face how they felt about his former girlfriend. It just feels nice to have someone listen and be on his side, it made him want to open up more.
“Sorry, I really don’t want to seem mean, I just think its kind of bullshit for her to act jealous because you’re talking to someone. Like, why does she care who I am or how you know me when she cheated on you,” You said, unable to help yourself from speaking your mind, “Even if I was someone you’re talking to, why is she concerned about it? Did she expect you to just always be hung on her despite what she did?”
Soobin had to think about that for a second. That’s the same thing he had originally thought too but he tried to ignore it because it seemed wrong. He thought that maybe he was reading into it too much and Jia wasn’t actually jealous but now that you’re saying it too, he can’t help but wonder. She also talked to him tonight and even at work when they didn’t speak, she was looking at him constantly. She even tried helping him once but he just blew her off to do it on his own. It’s like tonight she was trying to remind him she was still around and that confused him.
“Do you think that’s true though?” He asked. You shrugged trying not to seem too invested but it was too late. Soobin is a good guy and now that you’ve met the girl, you just can’t wrap your mind around what she did. Cheating is already a huge betrayal but to do it with someone Soobin knew and lived with? To do it in the apartment, Soobin paid for? That’s the lowest of the low.
“I honestly do.”
What you said stayed on his mind for days. It didn’t help that Jia was trying to talk to him at work and last night she looked at his instagram story despite the fact they unfollowed each other. He just doesn’t get it. What did she want with him now?
When he came into work today, there was his favorite drink in his locker that he knew was from Jia because Taehyun had told her. Thankfully he wasn’t working with her now but Taehyun had filled him in. Apparently, she came in with drinks and he saw her putting it in Soobin’s locker.
“I don’t get her,” Soobin said with a huff of frustration, “Why does she keep doing these things?”
“Honestly, she probably regrets fucking up and wants to get on your good side again,” Taehyun said as he made a hot matcha latte for a customer that Soobin was ringing up.
“But why?”
“What if she wants to get you back?” Taehyun asked as he finished the drink and handed it to the customer. He turned back to Soobin, realization hitting him like a truck and he gasped, “Oh my god. She probably thinks you’ve moved on already and wants to get you back! That’s really bold of her to think you’d fall for it, right?”
“Right. You don’t think she is though, right? Why would she cheat on me just to try and get back with me?” Soobin asked and his voice was laced with confusion.
“Because she probably thinks it’s going to work and you’ll fall for it. God I knew based off her MBTI that she was going to try something, I could see the determination in her eyes when she saw Y/n.”
Soobin couldn’t help but scoff with a laugh. Why were you the reason Jia suddenly wanted to notice him again? You and Soobin were nothing but roommates, the only time you ever talk is during your daily debriefings when you’re getting midnight snacks. You don’t text and you don’t do anything together so it’s comical that you apparently worried his ex girlfriend enough based off one interaction to try and get him back—he wouldn’t do it, he should add.
“Wait! You know what you should do?” Taehyun dropped a itcher into the sink haphazardly as the idea came to mind, “Imagine if you started dating Y/n and made it known to Jia that you’ve moved on. She’s only putting in effort again because she probably thinks she can get you back. You gotta make her think you’re over her.”
“First of all, I am over her and second, Y/n and I don’t like each other like that,” Soobin said, making Taehyun roll his eyes.
“I don’t mean like actually date, I mean… make Jia think you are that way she can back off and won’t think she has a chance,” Taehyun said.
Soobin froze, looking at his friend in disbelief. Taehyun said it so casually like what he said wasn’t a big deal at all and Soobin just couldn’t believe it. He was completely lost by the whole and after an awkward silence between the two he just shook his head feeling a blush rise in his cheeks as he said, “That is a really bad idea.”
It was an awful idea and too much work. Soobin didn’t need to prove anything to anyone and why would he make Jia believe he was over her when he knew he was? She could try and talk to him all she wants but it won’t make a difference to him, honestly. It is kind of annoying that neither Taehyun or Yeonjun believed he was over Jia and now it seems like Jia doesn’t think so too? Why else would she be making this much effort to talk to him again?
Taehyun’s words were stuck in his head now and it made no sense. Why would he drag you into his problems and why would you want to do it? You probably have things going on in your own life that there's no reason to bother you with his. Sure, you’ve been fun to talk to since you’re not his usual circle of friends but that’s it. You don’t know each other well enough to do that.
“Hey,” when he got home that night, he could tell by the tone of your voice that something was off. You were in the kitchen washing some dishes when he walked in.
“Hey,” Soobin greeted as he began taking his shoes off at the door, “How was your day?”
“It was alright. I almost cried in the bathroom because my boss yelled at me for getting her the wrong milk in her coffee,” you said with a shrug, “And yours?”
“Oh,” Soobin said, blinking slowly trying to figure out if he should ask if you were okay or just say his part. “Um, it was nice, I worked with my friend but he said the craziest thing I had ever heard and it threw me off.”
You dried your hands off with the towel and walked past him, heading to your room but still holding conversation, “What’d he say?”
“He said that I should pretend to date you,” the words completely slipped from his and the second they were said, he felt his body tense up and his face go blank. You stopped at your door, turning to look at his confused state when he suddenly rushed to say, “I mean… She’s been trying to talk lately and I don’t know what she’s doing but it’s like she thinks we can get back together.”
He bit his lip and he just couldn’t stop talking, “So, Taehyun said I needed to make her think I was over her and that I should get your help but I thought it was an awful idea. Like, I don’t need to prove anything to her if anyone else and there’s no way you would ever do something lik—I would never ask you too and I know I should stop talking about it but you asked and for some reason I always just tell you what’s going and I can’t stop, oh my god.”
He covered his face with his hands, unable to see the way a smile played on your lips at his rambling. With a deep sigh you opened your bedroom door, “Goodnight.”
He waved goodbye, still refusing to look at you and stormed to his room in embarrassment. You got in yours and laid in bed where you got on your phone and immediately told your friends.
you: I think my roommate is weird
beomgyu: why
you: idk, just strange
kai: aww, ur twinning w/him (♡ˊ͈ ꒳ ˋ͈)
you: … ( •᷄ࡇ•᷅ )
beomgyu: (⸝⸝⸝◉⸝ 。 ⸝◉⸝⸝⸝)
you: anyway, he was talking about fake dating like this is a wattpad story
kai: do it, his ex is a bitch
Lately, it’s been getting hard for Soobin to look forward to the café. It’s such a huge contrast to the work he does at his internship that going to the cafe sometimes feels relaxing and not like work at all but these past few weeks have been dreadful. It’s very hard to ignore someone who hurt you when you have to work with her. It’s a constant reminder and everyone seems to always point it out. Taehyung was right, she was trying to do something with him again and it’s becoming even more noticeable everytime he goes to work.
“Are you going to Yuna’s party this weekend?” Jia asked him. The shop had been slow so he busied himself with closing duties, hoping he could get done sooner and meet his friend.
“Probably,” Soobin answered absently.
“Oh, maybe I’ll see you there,” Jia said with a nervous laugh, “I gotta be honest, Soobin it’s strange being so distant.”
Soobin scoffed, looking at her in disbelief. What was wrong with her and why did she act like there isn’t a cause for this distance.
Just as he was debating telling her how he felt, the bell above the door chimed and they both got ready to greet them with a customer service smile. His soon turned into a real smile despite his confusion at the surprise, “What are you doing here?”
“I want coffee?” Your tone was questioning but light as you got to the counter, trying not to look at the girl again.
It’s been a bit awkward since Soobin made that weird comment the other night but you’re tired of acting bothered by it. It was harmless and your friends thought it was funny [ and a good idea? ] but you just thought it was bizarre. You think it’s strange and although you wanted to avoid Soobin it’s very hard when you get to know him. He’s kind of cute actually—not looks wise but personality wise.
“Nice,” Soobin said with a nod of his head although he made no move to ring you up or make you a drink. You looked from him down to the register, “Can I order yet?”
“Oh, yes,” he cleared his throat awkwardly and waited for you to say something. Once he rang up your drink, he gave a discount and left to make it while you paid.
Honestly, he thought you were mad at him for what he said. He still has no idea why he brought up what Taehyun said but the way you ignored him let him know it was a mistake at the time. He’s been worried for days that he crossed the line but now you’re here talking to him like everything is normal. It makes him feel better.
You could feel Jia’s eyes on you and this time around it bothered you. Why was she glaring at you like you were the problem? You don’t even know her and it’s very obvious there’s nothing between you and Soobin. Why would it matter to her if there was or wasn’t?
“Are you off already?” Soobin asked handing you your drink over the counter.
You nodded, “Kind of? I still have some stuff to finish up but the WiFi at home is lagging.”
“Just work here then,” Soobin said motioning toward the tables, “Connect to the internet and keep me company.”
“How? You’re working,” you pointed out.
“Nobody’s here,” Soobin said, completely dismissing Jia, “Please?”
Now that he knows you’re not bothered by him it’s been like a confidence boost to try and befriend you again. He just needed the assurance that you weren’t going to ditch him and move out so for you to come and talk to him felt good. He was worried he scared you off.
With a dramatic sigh, you pretended to give in, “Oh, I guess I could do that. I’ll just stay a bit.”
“Or you could stay till I’m off and we can go home together,” Soobin said but the sound of the espresso machine grumbling stole your attention instead. Jia was cleaning it already and had no problem cutting your conversation short with the loudness of it.
She was clearly annoyed with you being here and you just couldn’t understand it. Why was she so mad when she’s the one who ruined her relationship with Soobin? Soobin deserved so much better and it annoys you that she’s the one upset now.
“Maybe, who knows if I want to wait that long,” you said playfully, watching him leave the counter to talk to you. You were the only one in the shop and he didn’t care either way, you’re his saving grace from spending this last hour with Jia trying to talk to him.
“Please? I’ll buy you food on the way,” he said, feeling your eyes on him.
He wore a cream colored crew neck and light washed baggy jeans, a brown apron tied at his waist and even his glasses tonight. You don’t see him in his glasses often so it was a nice surprise, “Alright, you got me. I’ll stay.”
What really made you decide on staying wasn’t his begging or his offer to buy you food but it was actually knowing he probably wanted to avoid any more alone time with his ex. You already pitied the guy’s circumstances and you couldn’t just leave him to suffer while he begged for your help.
So you stayed, you had to remind Soobin every now and then to get back to work when he would lose track of time telling you whatever was on his mind and forget a customer was around. Jia did not acknowledge you at all, not until the very end when she came up to you and with a snarky tone said, “Heads up, we close in ten minutes.”
“Okay,” you flashed her a polite but strained smile, “I’m just waiting for Soobin.”
“I know, but you’ll have to leave when we’re closing,” she said bluntly.
“Really? Thanks for the heads up,” you put your headphones back on and turned your attention to your laptop, making it known you weren’t going to talk to her anymore and with a slight roll of her eyes, she left.
After a minute or so, you closed your laptop and put your things away. You got up from the table as Soobin was coming out with things he was planning on restocking and when he saw you get up, he practically dropped it all to go to you, “What are you doing?”
“I’m just going to wait outside,” you said with a shrug, slinging your backpack over your shoulders.
“Bu—“
“Soobin, can you start cleaning out the espresso machines?” Jia asked with an annoyed tone and with a huff in irritation, he watched you make your leave till he was alone once again.
He didn’t bother talking to her as he finished up his chores and the cafè was filled with an uncomfortable silence the remainder of the time. He’s been cleaning all evening but Jia wants to remind him about the espresso machines just because she sees him talking to you. It’s crazy and Soobin doesn’t know how to speak up.
He has so much he wants to say but then he gets worried he’s being rude or overthinking things that he ends up just staying silent anyway. That’s probably why his relationship with Jia was so rocky from the beginning—and also why he didn't argue when he caught her. He just doesn’t want to be in uncomfortable situations.
You had honestly debated just going home despite Soobin wanting you to stay. It was freezing cold out and you only had a thin sweater that did nothing to keep you warm. You had every right to just go home but he asked you so nicely and Jia was kind of rude when she tried kicking you out and it makes your pettiness want to show through.
When Soobin and Jia finally finished closing, she waited around while she locked the door looking like she had something to say but he wouldn’t even turn to look at her. Instead, he looked around for you, worried you had left already but he found you sitting on the curb, surprising him in the process. Jia didn’t seem to see you there either and it was hard for her to hide the look of displeasure when you got up.
“So what are you feeding me?” You asked, hugging your arms around yourself to fight off the cold wind from the winter air. Soobin didn’t hesitate to take off his jacket, leaving him only in a crewneck and pulling it around you.
“Something warm?” He asked, looking at the tip of your nose which was a deep shade of red. The two of you left without so much as a goodbye and when you were out of earshot he added, “Also, thanks for waiting. I thought you would’ve left and now I feel bad that you had to wait outside. I would’ve said something but you were already leaving and I assumed you got mad and went home.”
“I was going to,” you said honestly as he held the door open to some Korean hotpot tent restaurant, “But I decided against it. Also, I’ve got something to say.”
“Oh yeah?” He asked, sitting down at a table across from you.
“I can tell you struggle a little bit speaking your mind and she talks to you like she still has a say over what you do,” you said to him, “And she was kind of rude? Like, she didn’t say anything mean to me but it’s obvious she doesn’t like me for talking to you and I don’t think that’s fair. So, is there any way we can make her know you don’t want her without you having to tell her harshly?”
It took him a moment to process everything you had said in such a short time and he wondered if you had said anything at all. Maybe he imagined you saying that because it’s been in his mind lately and he couldn’t see what you would gain anything from it so why would you help him?
He should just tell you it’s not something you have to do. If you were to go along with a charade just so that it looks like he’s moved on from his ex. He knows he has, he just can’t be mean. All he can do is ignore her but that doesn’t seem to be stopping Jia from approaching him. No, it still doesn’t mean he has to drag you into something useless.
“Well, there’s a party this weekend that I know she’ll be at.”
Pulling it off was harder than you had originally thought and there’s very specific reasons for this.
One, appearing as anything aside from friends or roommates was hard considering you were still at an awkward stage of friendship. You knew Soobin and how he looked in the mornings but you’ve no clue what his favorite movie is or favorite color or even his zodiac sign. You knew his ex girlfriend was a cheating bitch but you don’t know what his internship is or what his major was in college so when someone at the party asked you things about Soobin… you had no idea what to say.
Two, you’re not sure if the chemistry is there. So far, you don’t think you’re pulling it off. Sure, Soobin has remained at your side since the two of you got here but you think you both look stiff and nervous. Even when someone expects him to introduce you, it feels weird and you’re not sure how close you’re supposed to seem.
“You two suck,” Taehyun said [the first time he had ever spoken to you too], “Put some flavor into this. Hold hands, act cute, give me emotion because I can tell you right now, Jia won’t think she’s got competition.
Soobin rolled his eyes, “Shh, this is harder than we thought it would be— a-nd it’s not about competition.”
“Really? Because Yuna asked me who you brought because Jia was asking her, something about you not wanting to talk to her?” Taehyun said with a chuckle, “It’s like she’s completely forgotten what happened.”
You hadn’t spoken up once this entire time but Soobin was beginning to look visibly uncomfortable talking about his ex in a crowded place. Usually he’s open when you’re at home and you’re the only one listening to him but right now he keeps glancing around anxiously.
“Should we get a drink?” You asked him suddenly, watching him nod his head eagerly in an attempt to leave his friend who said too many things he didn’t want to hear right now.
“Sorry for him, he just says things sometimes and—“
“It’s alright,” you laughed softly, making your way to the kitchen where the countertop was filled with various bottles. Soobin was right behind you, not wanting to lose you in the crowd.
He doesn’t understand you. You’re so nice to him and he doesn’t know what to make of it. You don’t question him or make him talk when he doesn’t want to. You seem to have some understanding of what he wants and he doesn’t even have to tell you anything.
He knows you’re just helping him out so he doesn’t look like a sore loser at a party he knows his ex-girlfriend is at but for the moment, he wants to forget Jia is here. Can he just have one night where his past relationship isn’t brought up by Taehyun or Yeonjun or anybody else? Can he just pretend like the two of you are here as friends just hanging out and not because you somewhat pitied his circumstances?
“You look pretty tonight,” the words slipped before he could stop himself and he immediately turned red in embarrassment, “I mean… yknow…”
“Thanks,” you said casually as you filled a cup of whatever interested you, “I actually put in effort, just for you.”
You didn’t think much about what you said even though you could see the blush in his cheeks. It was a bit surprising actually. At first, you thought Soobin was just some distant gamer you shared an apartment with but little by little you’ve gotten to know him more. He’s still shy like you first assumed but he’s also kind of cute, as a friend you mean. It would be weird to think of him as anything but that considering what he’s gone through lately.
He couldn’t help but smile, trying to hide it by biting his lower lip but his dimple still showed through and for a second he just stood there looking at you. You handed him a drink and as he opened his mouth to say something else, a familiar feminine voice came from behind him.
“Soobin? Is this where you’ve been hiding all night?” Yuna asked as she entered the kitchen with a smile, “I kept hearing everyone say you were here but I couldn’t find you. Hey buddy.”
“Hey Yuna,” Soobin said with a smile. Yuna was one of the few other baristas from work and someone he did enjoy working with. She was bubbly and nice so they got along easily but she’s more friends with Jia than him. He still can’t tell if she knew Jia cheated on him or not and he hasn’t bothered saying anything. She knew something happened to make them break up but neither have gone into it for different reasons. He didn’t want to tell the whole world he was cheated on and Jia didn’t want to seem like the lying cheater she was.
“This is Y/n,” Soobin said suddenly, grabbing your hand and pulling you toward his side, “She’s my uh, um…”
“Friend,” you said, emphasizing on the word that it sounded like it had a double meaning and he couldn’t tell if you did it on purpose. Did you mean friend, like how he’s friends with Yeonjun and Taehyun? Or did you mean, friend, like something more?
While he tried to decipher it, Yuna seemed to pick up on the tone much faster than he did and her smile strained slightly. “Really? That’s, uh, that’s great. Have you seen Jia yet?”
“Who?” You asked Soobin, looking cutely confused, feigning innocence as you touched his arm.
“The girl from work,” Soobin said despite you already knowing. The room began to feel hot as Yuna stared at you and Soobin couldn’t take the heat. He didn’t like the way it seemed like she was trying to pick you apart with her eyes—probably seeing if there was anything she should tell Jiw and he couldn’t take it. It had him taking big sips of his drink to satiate his dry mouth, completely ignoring the heavy taste of alcohol.
“Binnie,” your use of a nickname nearly sent him in a spiral, it was the first time you’ve ever called him as such and there was a possibility it was all for show.
“Yeah?” He cleared his throat awkwardly, ignoring Yuna to turn to you.
“Don’t drink so fast, okay?” Concern was evident in your tone but you didn’t seem displeased. You just worried about having to haul a 6-foot-something drunk man back to your apartment when he wasn’t your boyfriend.
He looked down at his empty cup, realizing he really did chug back the full drink quickly and the thought alone made him dizzy. He’s usually good at knowing his limit but he’s been nervous all night. When you first got here he got a drink that emptied out right after he saw Taehyun for the first time. It was before Taehyun had even approached you two because he was in the middle of some game but it made Soobin nervous. He had to tell his friend ahead of time that he was bringing you but then the thought of Taehyun saying something he should had him anxious and he chugged his drink then too.
Now, Yuna’s here bringing up Jia once again and on top of that you’ve called him a friend but your tone sounded different than usual and you held his arm and called him Binnie—and it all just became too much.
What was wrong with him?
“Soobin?” You said his name a little while after the kitchen encounter and you sounded so distant despite standing right next to him. Just by looking at him, you could tell he was at least tipsy.
His cheeks were flushed, his eyes a bit lazy and he just seemed less stiff than earlier. He’s also leaning into you a bit, no longer caring who saw or what people thought of it but more so for a sense of comfort as his vision blurred with the alcohol in his system. “Hm?”
“You okay?” You asked as he blinked slowly, “You don’t seem as nervous anymore.”
“Oh! Um,” he looked down at you and how close the two of you had grown, making him grin, “I’m fine, I’m with you.”
“Okay… but let me know when you’re ready to call it a night,” you said with a small yawn and he couldn’t help but look to your lips, blinking away the thought as you pressed your lips closed and looked off in the distance.
He shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts a bit but right now everything seemed fuzzy. The night had been fine at first. He hadn’t been nervous at all and was actually a bit excited to get a chance to hang out with you [aside from the night you stopped to get food] and he had been thinking on how it would go all day.
When the two of you got to the party he had met up with Taehyun and he had a good time with him too so the only time he ever felt uncomfortable was when he was reminded of the situation. Talking about Jia didn’t bother him as much as the reminder that everyone knew about it did. On top of that, anytime someone looked at you or asked who you were, he would get nervous. He doesn’t know what’s going on with him.
Just as you were going to ask him one more time if he was okay, you felt a sudden weight pressed against your shoulder as Soobin leaned into your side. He felt heavy against your arm and his head dipped low enough that his face was pressing into yours, “I think I’m ready.”
“Ready?” You ask, feeling your heart race as the warmth of his breath fanned your neck and his hand brushed against yours like he was debating reaching for yours. When you looked at him, it was finally noticeable that whatever he drank tonight had taken effect and he was finally drunk. He’s more quiet than you expected. His cheeks are red with a blush and his lips a bit pouty making him look a little cute.
He nodded his head aggressively, “Let’s go home.”
You didn’t question his decision and took his hand in yours when he swayed in his step and looked around for his friend so they could at least say their goodbyes. Every now and then you would look back to see how he was hanging but he seemed perfectly content having a blank mind and being dragged behind you.
“Soob? You good there, buddy?” Taehyun asked once he saw his friend’s state of drunkenness and placed a soothing hand on his tall friend’s back.
“Yesh,” Soobin said, leaning into your back, “Going home.”
Taehyun looked over at you with concerned eyes, “Are you alright? Sorry, I think he had too much to drink.”
“I’m good, the last bus will pass soon so we’ll just get home that way,” You told him, scanning the people around at the party, eyes catching on the one person you didn’t care to see.
Jia didn’t shy back from your short eye contact and she looked far from happy at the way Soobin was clinging to you—something he never did with her. To be fair, Jia was usually the one out at parties and getting wasted so she didn’t give him many chances to be the drunk one with no worries.
It bothered her to see how comfortable Soobin had gotten with another girl after their break up.
“Alright, i’ll give you my number and just let me know if you two get home safe,” Taehyun said before leaning closer into you, “Also, Soobin really likes being around you. Be safe.”
His friend left after that and for a moment you thought about what he just said, wondering how he meant it and if you were too hard into it.
“Y/n,” Soobin whined against you, “Home, please.”
“Oh my god, okay, let's go,” You said with a small laugh as he followed after you as got to the door.
Soobin was tired, he always got sleepy when he drank too much and when the two of you got on the empty bus, he couldn’t help but rest his head against the window. You didn’t pay much attention to him on the ride home but every now and then he could feel your eyes on him probably wondering how he was holding up. Going up to your apartment was another challenge trying to drag Soobin up the stairs without stumbling up the steps.
“Thanks,” Soobin yawned cutely as he rubbed his tired eyes, waving you goodnight.
You went to your room silently, flashing him a smile as you left and once your door was shut, you immediately began to undress. It had been a long night and all you wanted was to crawl in bed, scroll in your phone and go to sleep. You didn’t drink as much as Soobin did so the alcohol didn’t have the same effect on you but you were still tired. It was nice getting to hang out with him for a while despite the reason or who was around. At some points you were able to forget who was there but when you would catch sight of Jia and think back to Soobin, you just couldn’t understand why she would ever do that to someone.
Now changed into your pajamas, too tired to do anything more, you were halfway crawling on your bed when there was a soft thud on your door and a small whine of your name, “Y/n.”
“Yes, Soobin?” You asked with a sigh and a smile as you heard your roommate on the other side of the door, “I thought you were going to bed.”
“I’m not tired, can I come in?” He asked and you could practically see the pout on his lips. It was about midnight so you should just turn him away but you could hear the shuffling on the other side of the door and before you knew it, you were unlocking your bedroom door and letting him in.
“What’s wrong?” You asked as he hesitated to sit on the edge of your bed.
“Nothing,” he answered honestly, “I just… I wanted to see what you were up to, were you going to bed?”
“I was probably just going to be on my phone a bit,” you laid down on your usual spot reaching for the remote to your television, “What should I watch?”
You didn’t outwardly tell him to lay down next to you but the way you moved your things to your side, it was easy to assume you didn’t mind. Soobin was still hesitant to lay down with his back against your headboard but once you made no sign to kick him out, he let himself relax as you scrolled through Netflix.
“Something scary,” Soobin said, barely paying attention as he looked around your bedroom. This was the first time he had stepped into it since you moved in and it looks completely different than what it did before. He couldn’t explain into words but it looked like a room you would have. It was like an insight to who you are from the pictures on your walls to the clothes by your closet. It was cozy and your bed was so soft he found himself yawning.
“You surprised me tonight,” You told him as you finally settled on a movie about a haunted house, “First because you were surprisingly popul—“
“Why’s that a surprise?” Soobin asked, slightly more alert as he looked at you, “I’m a catch.”
“You are,” you said casually, “I just meant… a lot of people like you.”
He couldn’t help but bite his lips at your words. He didn’t mean to seem overly confident or anything but he knew he was somewhat likable. He tried being nice and friendly to everyone and clearly sometimes that didn’t work in his favor when it came to relationships but he’s always had people around him. Not everyone he would consider a real friend but the ones he have right now or the real deal.
Taehyun and him got along from the moment they met at work. Soobin’s the one who trained Taehyun when he first started and they just got super close from there.
Yeonjun has been his best friend for as long as he can remember and they even fight like an old bickering couple too.
Sometimes they don’t understand him—like when they thought he was still upset over Jia, and he needs a break from them but that’s where you came along. You’re one of his friends now too so does that mean you also like him?
As a friend?
As more?
No, not as more. He was getting ahead of himself.
“Don’t say those things to me, Y/n,” Soobin whined, hiding behind a pillow.
“Why?” You asked with a small laugh as he curled himself up on your bed, looking every bit out of place in your Sanrio bed sheets and his tall frame.
“Because, they’ll get to my head,” he confessed, sitting up a little to regain himself, “So what’s the other reason you were surprised by me?”
You hummed in thought, “You’re surprisingly cute when you’re drunk, and really clingy.”
It was clear that throughout the time it took to get home, Soobin had sobered up enough to have clearer thoughts and you just wanted to be honest. It’s what you believed and you hoped he wouldn’t take it the wrong way and think you were hitting on him. Sure, Soobin is attractive for many reasons and you enjoy hanging out with him but just think about the circumstances. He’s your roommate and he just got out of a relationship with someone who cheated on him.
“I mean,” you cleared your throat awkwardly, acting like you were watching the movie, “I bet you really sold it to Jia that you were seeing someone. There’s no way she’ll try and get you to go out with her again now.”
At the reminder, Soobin seemed to sigh, “Yeah.”
For a second he had thought you were going to say something else. He doesn’t know what he’s feeling at the moment and it worries him but at the same time it’s exciting and he wished he didn’t react this way to you and so soon.
“Do you work tomorrow?” You asked him, letting out a small yawn as you made yourself more comfortable indeed the covers.
“Only in the afternoon,” Soobin said, looking over at you hopefully, “Why? Do you want to do something?”
“I have to work, if I get off early I might stop by,” You said, looking back at him too. You could see the small dimple in his cheek become more prominent as he resisted the urge to smile, nodding his head.
With a small sigh, Soobin checked the time and sat up, “Okay, I’ll let you sleep.”
For some reason he wanted to do or say more but he’s not sure what he would’ve been able to say in the first place. You got up after him so you could close the door on his way out but at the door, you both stopped to look at each other.
“I did have fun tonight,” you told him truthfully.
Soobin stood at the door looking down at you with his lip pulled between his teeth. It was becoming more obvious that he liked being around you. He thought you were pretty and fun to be with and you have yet to make him feel poorly. He’s very aware of the fact that he’s only been single for a little over a month but he can’t deny the sudden race in his heart when you’re around.
It scares him to think he might be feeling something toward you at such an awkward time.
“Goodnight.”
Things slowly began to change between you two and neither one of you knew what to do about that sort of thing. On one hand, Soobin wanted to see if you would like to spend more time together but he also wasn’t sure if he was ready. It has nothing to do with how he felt toward his ex girlfriend and more with how he felt at possibly seeing someone again.
Jia was a major push to his confidence and definitely raised his insecurities and trust issues so he thought he would stay single for a while. Plus, you were his roommate which could pose an entirely different problem and yet none of that has helped him stop thinking about you. It’s been days from the party and he knows hes been slightly more in your bubble than before but its only because he doesn’t know how to read you.
How is he supposed to know how you might feel about him and how should he feel about it?
“You’re overthinking it,” Yeonjun said as he sat across from Soobin and Yeonjun who were in their matching brown aprons as part of the cafe’s unofficial uniform. The cafe was empty aside from a couple college students grossly immersed in their studies to care that the only two workers were currently siting at a table with a friend. Every now and then the three would feel the eyes of some high school girl gawking at them through the shop windows but none dared to enter making the cafe slow with traffic.
“If you like her, why can’t you at least try?” Yeonjun asked him like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“Because she’s my roommate and what if that just messes things up completely?” Soobin asked.
“I mean, Y/n seemed pretty into you at the party,” Taehyun said with a shrug of his shoulders.
Soobin shook his head, “No, she was just being nice. I was drunk and probably embarrassed myself so there’s no way she liked it—well, okay she said it was cute, but do you think she meant it?”
Yeonjun reached across the small table and pinched Soobin’s cheek hard, pouting his lips in a kiss as he gushed over his friend, “Of course she meant it, just look at you. Who can resist this bunny face?”
Just as Soobin was ready to fight Yeonjun off, the familiar bell above the door rang and a loud burst of energy came through the door.
“Kai, I swear to god, if you don’t stop I’m going to bite you,” a guy said as he smacked another guy off and the two cafe workers couldn’t help but snap into attention and get behind the counter.
“Y/n,” Kai said with a forced whiny voice, “Save me.”
“Don’t touch me,” you pushed him off as you looked around the cafè for Soobin.
Just a couple feet away from you, he stood there with his lips parted in surprise before letting his eyes drift off to the two guys behind you. A smile spread across his lips as he left Taehyun and Yeonjun to go to you, “Hi, what are you doing here?”
“We were just at the arcade across the street so I figured why not stop for a drink?” You said with a gentle smile that had him practically giggling.
“Oh, so you didn’t come just to see me?” Soobin teased, a flirty undertone in his voice. He couldn’t help but glance back to the guys, curious who they were.
Since you moved in, you haven’t brought anyone home and he assumed you were single since you offered to go with him to a party—and let him on your bed, but now he’s not sure. What if everything you were doing really was as a friend and he’s just overthinking it all?
“Sadly no, I really need coffee,” you joked as he went to the counter to get you a drink. Taehyun was helping the two guys while you talked to Soobin and he couldn’t wait to be done so he can ask who they were.
“O-oh,” he cleared his throat awkwardly as he began to make it, ringing you up and trying to apply some sort of discount so you wouldn’t have to pay full price. Before he could tell you your total,one of the guys who was with you gave him cash to pay.
Beomgyu placed his hand on your shoulder as he leaned down to whisper, “Is this him?”
You just nodded your head ignoring his growing smile as he thanked Soobin for his change back and ruffled your hair, “Hurry up, I need real food.”
“Are you gonna be home later?” Soobin asked as the guys left through the door, waiting outside but looking in and it was clear they were talking about you. He wanted to say he was just curious for no reason but part of him wanted to know if you would be out with them.
“Probably, not till late though, I think we’re probably gonna go have a drink or two,” you said with a shrug and this was the perfect time for Soobin to ask who they were. Were they just friends? Was one of them something more? Have you been in any relationship?
“Let me know if you want me to pick you up,” Soobin said, “I-I mean, yknow, repay the favor from the other night that I embarrassed myself.”
“You didn’t,” you rolled your eyes looking around. Your friends were waiting and you had your drink so you should’ve left by now but instead you’re looking at his two friends. Taehyun had gone with Yeonjun again and it’s the first time in a while you saw Yeonjun. When you first met him he had gone over to the apartment and you had thought he was attractive. You still do but not in the same context anymore. Taehyun waved at you enthusiastically which you did back and looked back at Soobin, “It was cute, but should I call you tonight then? Or will you be asleep.”
“I’ll hear you come home either way, so come say hi even if it’s late,” Soobin said, making you nod your head.
“Okay, well I have to go before they come and drag me out,” you told him as you pointed to your two friends who were getting annoyed waiting out there.
“Y/n,” he called for you but when you looked back at him, he couldn’t bring himself to ask, “Nevermind, be safe.”
Soobin waved you goodbye and watched you leave with the guy from earlier wrapping his arm around your shoulders.
“God, Bin, you can’t even hide it,” Yeonjun said with a chuckle as Soobin joined them again, “You looked jealous.”
“What?” Soobin looked at him with big doe eyes, looking every bit clueless as he felt, “No, I just—I don’t, um, Y/n’s… did I?”
They both nodded their heads and Taehyun said, “Yes but not too much. We noticed because we’re your best friends but I’m sure none of them could tell. You were all smiley and blush which is major cringecore with Y/n but any time you looked at those guys, you’d glare.”
“I don’t glare,” Soobin muttered under his breath as he stared at the window, “Besides, I don’t know if one of them is dating Y/n so there’s no point in doing anything now.”
“You didn’t bother to ask!?” Yeonjun and Taehyun asked at the same time that it caused Soobin to jump, feeling startled.
“I’m sorry but if I was into someone and I was in their bed and then I see them talking to someone, you better believe I’m going to ask who!” Yeonjun added, making Soobin groan in frustration that he couldn’t just man up and ask.
It’s clear there’s no point in pretending he isn’t catching feelings for you and he has to figure out how to tell you. The only problem is if you reject him, he won’t be sure how to live with you anymore—especially if you were to date someone.
He should’ve just acted curious and asked who they were.
“You guys are so annoying,” you said with a groan as you followed after your two best friends who were fighting down the street.
“Soobin and Y/n, kissing in a tree! K-I-S-S—ow, ow, ow!” Kai cried out as you pulled his ear.
“This is why I don’t tell you guys anything,” you said when they laughed. Kai was doing that creepy evil loud laugh he always does and Beomgyu is just instigating it.
“First of all, you tell us everything,” Beomgyu pointed out, “And what’s the problem? Pretty sure he likes you too.”
“Oh my god, I don’t like Soo—I mean, he’s my roommate, it would be weird,” you said, “Plus, he just got out of a relationship.”
“Yeah like two months ago or something, and she cheated on him,” Kai said before clutching his chest, “You could heal his heart.”
“Corny,” Beomgyu yelled and the two laughed again.
“Whatever, let’s just go eat.”
It took a lot of convincing from his friends for him to actually agree to just go for it. He had been debating it for a while now and each day that passed where he gets to see you first thing in the morning or last thing at night just reminds him he wants to keep seeing you. He’s not sure how much more he could go just acting like a friend.
He likes everything about you and he’s not good at hiding it. Usually, it takes him a while to fall for someone.
When he met Jia its because they were partners in chemistry one semester and she helped him get the job at the cafe so he could make more money aside from his internship. Truth be told, Jia kind of scared him at first because she never hid her interest from him. She was aggressive with it and he didn’t know how to react so he never made a move on her.
She’s the one who had to ask him and even then, he didn’t say yes right away because he hadn’t been sure if it was something he wanted to do. Over time he obviously grew feelings for her but the relationship never felt as easy as his friendship with you did.
So really, the realization of how differently and strongly he felt for you in such a short time was an indicator that he clearly had strong feelings for you.
When he got home after the cafe, he had a strong sense of confidence that was going to be his push to just go for it. He had been talking himself up all day and had decided the worst thing that could happen is you say no. He could live with that… maybe.
“Y/n?” Soobin called out to you as he dropped his things at the door, “You home?”
You were in your room reading some poetry book with music playing quietly and he knocked on your open door. You looked up at him, sliding your headphones down to your neck, “Hey.”
You sat up a little, motioning for him to come inside and he looked around nervously, “Are you busy?”
“No?” You smiled as you looked down at your book, “What’s up?”
Soobin bit his lip in thought as he tried to figure out how to word it before saying, “Do you want to… I don’t know, get food? Maybe go for a walk later?”
“Um, sure?” You said with a racing heart, “What time?”
“Um, an hour? Forty five minutes?” Soobin asked, more eager now knowing you’ll hang out with him, “Thirty?”
“In thirty minutes?” You asked, “Okay.”
“Okay, I’m just gonna change and probably, uh,” Soobin blinked nervously, “Get ready.”
“Okay,” you laughed softly as he nearly stumbled out the door. Once your door was shut, you jumped out of bed and straight to your vanity where you hoped to make yourself look a little better.
This wasn’t a date.
Soobin didn’t ask you out, he just asked you to get food.
How would you feel if he were to ask you on a date? Would he ever do that or does he only see you as a friend? For all you know, he’s sworn off dating completely.
When you left with Soobin at your side, things were normal. You talked about normal things, laughed about normal things and for a while you were able to forget your worries. You were just spending time with someone you enjoy spending time with without thinking every little thing over nonstop.
“So what’s your type?” Soobin asked so suddenly that you nearly choked on your water. Usually he’s not so forward with his questions so it caught you off guard. The two of you were at a small restaurant and it felt oddly like a date when he asked you things like this.
With an awkward clear of your throat, you said, “Um, I’m not sure if I have a type. The people I’ve been with in the past have all been a little different, I think.”
“What about looks?” Soobin asked, fidgeting with the hem of his sweater. He knows he’s an attractive guy but what if he still wasn’t your type?
You laughed softly, “I don’t know, Binnie, I like who I like.”
Soobin couldn’t help but blush, as he finally decided to ask, “What about me?”
You looked at him curiously, trying to decipher what he meant and when he couldn’t meet your gaze, you said, “You?”
“Am I your type?” He asked quietly. The server brought your meals which worked as a distraction to give you time to calm your beating heart and you took a deep breath.
It was hard to say because as of now… yes. You’ve always thought Soobin was attractive and kind and you’ve never actually dated someone like him so to say he’s your type is weird when you’re not sure if you even have one. You like Soobin, you know you do but what would it mean if you answer this question and what does he expect you to say?
“I think so,” you said shyly, looking down at your plate to avoid his gaze. Soobin resisted the urge to smile and ask you more about how you might feel for him.
He tried not to bring so much up while you had your late dinner and when the bill came, it became another topic of discussion.
“Soobin, you paid last time,” you said remembering the time you went to get hotpot last time, “Either I can pay or we can split the bill.”
“I asked you to come out with me,” Soobin said, getting his wallet out, “So I’m going to pay.”
“Binnie,” you said to him, watching him set money for the bill and a little extra for a tip before standing up, ready to leave. The server took the money and bid you both a goodnight.
“Y/n,” he used the same whiny voice you had, “Next time I’ll let you pay, I promise.”
Part of him wanted to reach for your hand as you left the restaurant but instead, he said, “I don’t want to go home yet.”
You have to admit, Soobin is really making your heart flutter in a very confusing way. You thought about taking his hand in yours and leading him toward the park across the street but you decided against it, unsure if it was something he wanted.
The night of the party when you held his hand, he made sure to not let it go even when you were on the bus but maybe it was just because he was drunk and not feeling good?
“So let’s go on a walk then,” you said, taking the reign to hold his hand, trying not to think about it.
Soobin smiled widely as he happily held yours, swinging them a little, “Y/n, I just want to say, you’re one of my best friends.”
He’s not sure he’s ever been able to call someone he’s dating his best friend. His past girlfriends never really cared to get to know him or have the same interests which wasn’t necessarily a problem but you’ve become his friend first and he thinks that’s what helped him develop feelings for you. You liked the same things, you enjoyed each other’s company and you never made him feel weird no matter what he did. He was being honest when he called you his best friend, it’s just that he wanted you to be more too.
“Who’s my competition?” You asked, waiting for him to say Taehyun or Yeonjun but he just shook his head, fixing your hands so your fingers were intertwined.
“You don’t have any,” Soobin shrugged, staring ahead at the path of street lamps, feeling a slight chill in the night air.
After a while the two of you decided to take a seat on a bench nearby, just under a streetlamp that casted down on it like a scene from a movie. You couldn’t help but shiver under the cold yet neither one of you brought up possibly going home—as if that would end the chances of spending time together.
Soobin felt you shivering beside him and without wasting too much time pondering, he scooted closer to you until his side was pressed to yours and provide you with much needed warmth. You looked at him with a teasing a smile, “So what you’re saying is, I’m actually your only best friend. I’m not sure if Taehyung or Yeonjuun would like that.”
He smiled cheekily, “I’m sure they wouldn’t mind, I don’t really keep it a secret that you’re my new favorite person.”
“Oh wow, what an honor. What did I do to deserve that?” You asked with a playful tone, trying to hide the way your face began to heat up.
“I don’t know,” he shrugged, looking over at you with soft, moonlit eyes, “I’m still trying to figure that out too.”
You didn’t say anything for a moment, unsure what to even say and you just looked into each other’s eyes, wondering if you were thinking the same. You were so close now and it was getting very hard to ignore when you couldn’t look away from him. Soobin was hesitant for a long while, debating if he should just go for it.
There were a millón things running through your mind, some about kissing him, or not kissing. Wondering if you should cross the line or give him space. You turned to face him, lips parting, “I—“
It happened rather quickly, the brush of his lips against yours, and you hadn’t fully thought it through when you kissed him back. There was a sudden sense of bliss that caused him to relax into the short kiss, melting into you when your lips moved against his.
His fingers lingered on your thigh, itching to deepen the kiss with a hand in your hair. Just as he was going to reach out, you pulled away abruptly, nearly leaving him to follow and his eyes snapped awake, unaware when he closed them.
“I don’t know if this is a good idea,” You whispered so quietly he could barely hear you. It didn’t stop his heart from dropping with clarity, “Oh”
You were rejecting him, even if you kissed him too.
“Binnie, I just—I like you but,” You bit your lip nervously, ‘I don’t know if this is a good idea.”
“Oh,” he slumped back, giving you more space, “Why? Because we live together?”
“Yeah,” you sounded regretful, “And you haven’t been single for long and I just don’t want to be a, um…”
“You think it’ll be like a rebound?” Soobin asked with a small scoff, “Y/n, I… I wouldn’t do that to you, I want to try with you.”
“But, I don’t know, I just don’t want this to become a real thing, and it ends badly and we can’t talk anymore,” you confessed, “I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s okay,” Soobin said, “I get it.”
He doesn’t.
Silence filled the space between you and neither one of you knew what to do about it. The awkwardness was already beginning to settle and he didn’t want that at all. A sorry smile spread across his lips, “You’re still my favorite person.”
A laugh left your lips, an ounce of worry disappearing but you still felt awful. You liked Soobin, and you were always such a sure person but when it comes to relationships you can be doubtful. You never know their full intentions and although Soobin is a really good guy but you haven’t known each other long and he was just in a relationship not that long ago.
After a while he asked if you should head home and the walk back was a bit quieter.
Honestly, you really did like Soobin. You never thought of him as anything more than a friend but not because you wanted to friendzone him but because you I never thought he saw you as anything but. Maybe you thought you would be the one rejected that you never thought about him romantically. He was attractive and you always knew so but you just seemed different at the time.
You were friendly, you talked nicely to each other and to only been a while since you started hanging around him. You assumed you were the only one feeling this way and its strange to learn that’s not true.
How would you have guessed he had feelings for you? Sure, he was nice from the getgo but it had always been casual. The only time e acted differently was when he was drunk and even then you assumed it was because he was too drunk to remember. Sheen he crawled into your bed after, it are your heart race but nothing happened between you two and it was never mentioned again. You grew to like him but you had no idea he would start liking you too.
It was a flaw in your character design, you think. You have no problem making decisions and being more confident and in control with it came to other things but for some reason when it comes to yourself, you’re doubtful. It’s easy for you to catch on to feelings when it comes to others but yourself.
That’s not to say you’ve never been in a relationship with someone but you’ve always just struggled reading how someone feels about you. Now you feel awful thinking you read Soobin’s intentions wrong but you couldn’t help it. You know what it feels like to be a rebound and its not a feeling you want to go through again.
The other person didn’t make you feel as good as your time with Soobin does and that’s what worried you. You’re also not in a spot to put your living situation at risk again. You had gotten so lucky to find him and f it goes bad between you, where would you go? You’re not as strong as Soobin. He could keep working with Jia and seeing her in public after what she did to him and be fine, but would you be able to live with him after? If he hurt you, or if you hurt him… could you handle it?
Lately, its not that you’ve been purposely avoiding him but ever since the kiss, your paths have barely passed. It seems like you both made an effort to interact at least once before and now that you’re not, its been boring.
When Soobin gets to the cafe, he couldn’t even think about having to work with Jia. She wasn’t in his mind anymore because all he could think about is you. You didn’t fully reject him and that’s what drives him insane.
“Hey Soob,” Taehyung said as he watched his friend walked past him with a somber expression, completely ignoring him.
You like him. You said you liked him, right? So why can’t you just give him a chance?
His mind felt a million miles away as he slipped up on his apron, tying it over his baggy shirt and sweats. Soobin was unaware of the stares his coworkers sent him as he found his job for the day and busied himself with it.
“You’re quieter than usual,” Jia pointed out toward the end of their shift, “Did something happen?”
Her voice was laced with feigned concern and that only bother him more. Why does she bother pretending like she cares about him?
“Nothing that you have to worry about,” Soobin mumbled more to himself than her but she heard him anyway. He wouldn’t tell her about you and how you somewhat rejected him, instead he looked at the time wishing Taehyun could’ve just stayed till close with him and Jia.
“Soobin,” Jia’s voice was soft, coming over to where he was wiping down tables and chairs, “I know you and I aren’t as close as we used to be but… I really do care about you.”
A small scoff left his lips that he wasn’t able to hide as much as before and he turned away, ready to leave her behind so he could be alone.
“Does it have anything to do with that girl?” She asked closer to close when there wasn’t a single customer in sight and the sign had already been flipped.
Soobin couldn’t help but release a sigh in frustration as he looked at her, “Jia, why are you doing this?”
“Doing what?” She asked with furrowed brows.
“Why are you acting like you all of a sudden care? Can’t we just work without talking and then go home?” Soobin asked, clearly annoyed and not in the mood for her.
He’s kept his mouth shut ever since they broke up and he’s never asked her to explain anything or to apologize so why doesn’t she just let it go. He’s been biting his tongue because he didn’t want to seem bitter that she cheated on him but at this point he doesn’t care. He has other things to worry about then listening to his ex girlfriend try and act like everything is okay between them.
“Soobin, I’m sorry,” Jia confessed watching as he walked past her to the front door already holding the key to lock the shop for the night, “I know I probably hurt you and what I did was unforgivable but can you please just give me one more chance. I—I don’t like thinking you hate me.”
“Jia, I don’t hate you,” Soobin told her honestly as they stood outside and he can see the way she got hope in her eyes, making him keep explaining, “And I can work with you because I have to but I’m not going to forgive you.”
It felt strange being so honest after acting unaffected for a while but it was the truth and he needed to get it out, “You cheated on me, don’t you get that?”
“I know bu—“
“No, you clearly don’t know because since you saw me and Y/n get closer all you’ve wanted to do is talk to me. It’s not because you still want me but because you know you fucked up and don’t want me to move on with anyone else,” Soobin said harshly, “Do you realize how frustrating it is to want to be with someone and everyone thinks you’re not over your cheating ex girlfriend?”
Jia looked like she wanted to say something but the words were caught in her throat, so Soobin continued, “You slept with someone I lived with behind my back and in my own home and you think apologizing and asking for one more chance is going to work?”
She was frozen, unsure what to say or if she should say anything at all. Of course he’s right and she was only wishing that things could change but she knows that she fucked up. Being with Soobin had been great, he was sweet and caring and she wanted more so she looked for more in a guy who doesn’t mean a thing to either one of them.
It had always felt like Soobin didn’t love her, like he only dealt with her because they were dating and even then it felt like she pushed him to it. He never got upset with her, even when he caught her cheating, he was just quiet and listened to her apologies over and over again. All he did was ask them both to leave and that was it. When he still went to work at the cafe she hoped it was a sign that he would forgive her if he could still stand being around her but then you came along and she could see the way Soobin’s face began to light up.
From the get-go, she feels like you were able to draw more out from him than she ever was and that really did annoy her. She’s not putting the blame on him for her cheating but why couldn’t he show more with her as he had with you and why is it too late now?
“I’m sorry,” she said quietly, close to tears but it was obvious Soobin didn’t care anymore.
“Have a good night, Jia,” he sighed, leaving her behind as he went to the bus stop.
He likes you, you’re all he’s been able to think about and he can’t stand knowing you doubt his intentions. Soobin has never been the type to use someone for his own gain and even that night of the party he forgot you went with him so he wouldn’t be alone knowing Jia was there. Once he had you with him, he didn’t care who was around. All he cared about was you and he needs you to know that.
When he got home, he was surprised to see you coming out of your bedroom right as he walked through the front door. You looked over at him, nervous and unsure what to say or if you should say anything at all. You weren’t sure if he was still upset with you or if he was ever really upset by what you said.
“Hey,” you said shyly, walking toward the kitchen where you were returning a bowl.
“Hey,” Soobin set his things, debating if he should go to his room or just try with you one more time.
Now that he’s told Jia how he feels about her still trying with him, he feels more confident to tell you exactly what it is he wants with you. He doesn’t want a rebound, he doesn’t care about his last relationship, he cares about getting to know you and kissing you more.
“Were you just at work?” You asked, trying to make some conversation, see if you could read how he might feel with you.
“Yeah,” Soobin joined you in the kitchen, “I had to close with Jia.”
You turned away from the counter, jumping slightly at how close he was behind you suddenly, “And how was that?”
“Well she apologized and asked for a second chance,” Soobin said, looking down at you, so close that his front nearly brushed against yours. You raised a brow in surprise that Jia had the nerve to ask for another chance but you wondered if Soobin was bringing this up because he planned on giving it to her.
“Oh?” You said, unsure what he was planning on saying next.
Soobin bit his lip, not shying away from your stare like he normally would, “So I told her that it was never going to happen because I’ve moved on and I like you and I don’t want you to think I’m using you or still not over my ex because I’m so over her, you don’t understand. The night of the party was one of the first nights I realized how much I like you and it’s taken me a while to admit it because I wanted to be sure.”
You blinked in surprise as he moved even closer, “And I know you kind of rejected me the other night but I also know you like me too so if you just give me one chance, I swear I’ll be the best boy you’ve ever been with and I have no intentions of just being with you as some rebound. You mean so much more to me and I should’ve told you that the other night but Y/n, I really want to be with you and no one else.”
With a small sigh, you leaned onto the counter behind you and nodded, “I want to be with you too, Binnie, but…”
He couldn’t hold back the smile on his face as he reached forward, cupping your face in his hands, “Y/n, just give me a chance.”
“I—okay,” you laughed softly and with that, he was leaning down, pressing his lips to yours gently.
Your eyes fell shut, reaching out to touch him when he moved closer, pushing you against the counter with no room to go anywhere. A small gasp left your lips in surprise and it gave him a chance to deepen the kiss with his tongue.
“Soobin,” you laughed in shock as he pulled back in an attempt to catch his breath, “That was unexpected, different from the last kiss.”
His hands were resting on the counter, trapping you between them, he was leaning downuntil he could leave tender kisses along your neck, “I’m sorry, I… it was sudden and last time you wanted to stop.”
He was panting softly, eyes squeezed shut as he tried to take a deep breath, “Do you want to stop again?”
You looked into his eyes, “Not really.”
That was all he needed to hear before leaning back down for a kiss, this time sliding his hands down to your waist, grounding himself to the reality of this all. Your hands went to his soft black hair, brushed it out of his face and kissed him feverishly.
Soobin’s lips parted against yours, a sigh of relief escaped as he tilted his head to the side. You were a bit surprised by his forwardness once again that when his tongue trailed along your lower lip as if asking for permission, all you could was grant it. Your tongues met smoothly, circling around each other, before pulling back to his lips on your bottom one. Was he such a good kisser last time?
The more he seemed to lean forward and close the nonexistent gap between you, the more you leaned back with need, never once pulling your mouth away from his. With an annoyed huff at your attempt to lean back, he found himself tightening his grip on your waist before pulling you onto the counter making you gasp, “Bi—“
The near call of his nickname made him groan into your mouth, he kissed you with frenzy, like soon you would change your mind and everything would stop.
A small laugh escaped your lips at his eagerness, not shying away from wrapping your legs around his waist as he sat you down on the peninsula countertop. You brought a hand down to the cold marble, trying to steady yourself when he kissed along your jaw, then your neck leaving small red marks where he nipped at.
“Y/n,” Soobin’s voice caught you by surprise, his usual tone was deeper and hoarse with need as he pulled away from kissing you. His hands remained on your waist, his thumbs underneath the thin fabric of your shirt, inching it up just slightly, “One chance.”
“That’s all it’s gonna take,” he mumbled with swollen lips as he looked down at your lap, the material of your leggings not threatening and you could feel his hands slide down till they were at the hem of your leggings.
His gaze was darkened and you were admittedly incredibly turned on by this new side of him. It’s not like you expected him to suddenly take the lead so heavily but you can’t say you hated it. It’s different that what you’re used to from him and it makes you think back to the night of your first kiss. Should you have said yes all along? Would you have ever gotten to see this side of him where he felt the need to express just how much he wants to be with you?
Your eyes locked with his as he slowly began to pull down the material of your pants, lifting your hips slightly as he let them slide down. It’s like he was still waiting for you to tell him stop but with the parting of your legs and the way you guided him down to his knees, it was clear to him you wanted this just as bad.
Soobin started with gentle kisses along your thighs, neither you caring that you were doing this in your kitchen, it only seemed to fuel the heat in his stomach that you were alone. You licked your lips with anticipation, eyes dropping with need at the way he pulled your legs over his shoulders swiftly, looking down at your covered heat with a cute sort of curiosity.
He could see through the thin fabric how turned on you had gotten from the kiss. He can make out the shape of your slit and there was a slight dampness where your entrance would be and it made him feel so much bitter about the growing bulge in his jeans. With eager fingers, he pulled the fabric down, unable to help himself from teasing your heat with his nose tip, “Y/n.”
Your name fell from his lips so prettily that you nearly missed the urgency in it until you were looking at him, looking down at your cunt until finally, he leaned in. A sigh in content escaped you as he placed a soft kiss along your folds, teasing you by avoiding your hardened clit. His hands which held your legs apart were so far up your thighs you could feel the shadow of them against your core and it felt good to be grabbed by him. You never noticed just how big his hands were, or how good he could possibly be with his mouth.
After the light teasing he did with your folds, he licked softly against your clit before pulling it into his mouth, sucking gently making you moan for the first time. Soobin’s eyes immediately went to your face as he swirled his tongue around your clit, lathering it in his drool as he watched your face contort in pleasure making him throb in his jeans uncomfortably.
With one hand on the counter for support, your other hand went to his hair, pulling him closer between your legs and you could feel one of his hands unravel from your thigh and come up to your cunt. You could feel the tip of his middle finger dip into your folds, collecting whatever slick your pussy let out when he sucked on your clit and ever so gently, he pushed a finger in.
“You’re so pretty,” he sighed, attempting to catch his breath as he let his finger do some of the work. He rested his cheek against the softness of your thigh while beginning to thrust his middle finger into your wet pussy, “So fucking pretty, Y/n.”
With a deep groan, he went back to your clit, letting his middle finger hook into your g-spot while he mouthed at your clit, costing it in spit while fucking you with his finger. Your hand in his hair never let up, you used it for support, unable to keep your moans down, “Binnie.”
He felt the way you fluttered around him and it only made him put in more effort to bring you to your edge—and not just on the counter. He was nearly on his knees and his legs were beginning to cramp, his cock was getting heavy in its confinement but he didn’t let up. Instead, he let his mouth glide over your wet cunt leaving open mouth kisses in its wake.
“Oh god,” you whined softly as you felt a second finger push into your heat and a few seconds of this had your thighs threatening to shut, feeling the familiar knot in the pit of your stomach, “Your mouth feels so good.”
“Cum for me then, baby,” the words slipped from his lips without thought but for some reason those were the exact words you needed to hear. He felt your release on his tongue a short moment after he spoke and your folds throbbed with please around him.
“That’s it,” he groaned, watching your juice drop around his fingers, gently pulling them away and letting you relax post orgasm.
You looked at him with a new sense of attraction, why was he so confident in bed? Soobin’s cheeks flushed red as he looked down at the mess you made on the counter but his dick loved the sight of your release dripping down on the counter. It was an easy clean up and it was hot, so fucking hot.
Without much thought put into it, Soobin raised his soaked fingers to his lips, humming softly at the taste of your essence. A bunny-like grin spread across his face as he couldn’t help but laugh, “You know we’re not done, right?”
Despite the last couple moments where he’s initiated intimacy, he didn’t wait for permission. He was letting you know he wasn’t done with you yet and that made it all the better when he pulled you into his arms, not caring that you were half naked and taking you toward his bedroom.
He set you down on his bed gently, looking down at you as he yanked off his shirt exposing a lean body of muscle you hadn’t expected.
Soobin isn’t the type to show off his body, he liked more loose fitting clothes and whenever he’s complimented on his physique he always gets shy. Whenever he leaves his room or he knows you’re home he makes sure to be fully dressed and he’s kept himself a secret from you out of nervousness that you might get uncomfortable. Now that your eyes are on his toned stomach, all he could think about is how he wished you’d seen him sooner—if he knew you would look at him like this.
Seeing him undress before you, taking his jeans off next followed by his briefs left you with your lip pulled between your teeth. You now knew why he looked so sweaty early in the mornings, he went to the gym at dawn while you slept in.
You sat up and pulled your shirt off, careful to undo your bra as you felt the bed dip down with his weight and he crawled toward you, helping you throw your things down before pushing you to lay down.
“Condom?” You ask, making him look at you with a sense of curiosity. He knew what you were asking and he of course would oblige but as he looked down at your naked bodies and the way his hard cock pressed against your head, he couldn’t help but let his mind go astray. He just couldn’t believe this was actually happening.
You let Soobin get up as he leaned over his nightstand, praying to the universe that he had a condom somewhere about. It’s obvious he hasn’t had sex in a good long while but he’s just hoping the universe is on his side and he can find one.
After a moment of searching, his heart raced, moved back between your legs and kissed you hungrily. You took the condom from his hands, ripped the wrapper off and searched down his toned abdomen till you found his stiff member. Although you haven’t gotten a good look at it, it had a weight to it and good girth that you couldn’t help but write with need.
Soobin didn’t hesitate to himself up with your entrance when you got the condom on and as gentler as ever, he pushed in. A low growl left his lips as your walls hugged him tightly and he couldn’t help but let his strength falter, nearly crushing you with his weight at the pleasure.
"Mmm," he groans into your neck, his body pressed against yours as he pulled out slowly, taking a moan to let you feel his big mushroom tip against your ring of nerves. Once he needed more, he pushed back in with a bit more force.
“Soobin,” you moaned, letting your head fall back into to the pillows as his hips began a steady pace of thrusting into you, "Oh… fuck."
He brushed his lips against yours, fucking you with his big cock, basking in the feel of your pussy around him, “So wet, bub.”
His voice had softened even if his thrusts grew rougher, “You feel so good around me.”
Soobin couldn’t help but be close and he was awfully pathetic for it. In his defense, he had just made out with a girl he was crushing on for the past hour. Add on how he ate your pussy in the kitchen [of all places] he felt it was only human of him to be so close to cumming despite barely fucking you.
With a deep grunt, he snuck his hand under your arched back pulling you off the bed and a quiet squeal left your lips. You moved your legs to hug his waist and cling to him when he sat you down on his thighs, cock still deep in your pussy. Soobin’s hands founded their way to the softness of your ass, pinching softly at the way you basically cock warmed him and it took him a moment to raise you up, and pull you back to take him all.
“Please Y/n,” he groaned, grinding your pussy on his dick, “Just say you want to be with me already, fuck. I just want to hear you say it.”
Pure bliss was evident on his face and your usual cute Soobin was replaced by a feral, dark and lustful Soobin you weren’t used to. His hair was sweaty and voice so deep that you couldn’t help but succumb to his advances.
He hugged your body to his and you began to bounce on his lap, kissing his neck and letting your hands trace down his chest feeling his nipples harden, “I want to be with you, Binnie.”
“Fuck,” he groaned, “I’m gonna cum.”
His eyes squeezed shut urging every muscle in his body to hold back from cumming first but he couldn’t. A shiver ran down his body as he felt the knot in his stomach come undone, his cock shooting thick spurts of cum into the condom, trembling underneath you.
“Fuck,” his voice was dry, urging you to keep riding his cock, “Keep going.”
“Bin—“ you moaned, hearing the desperation in his voice and did as you were told. It didn’t take long for you to let go, cumming in his arms as he whispered how good you felt around him.
As gentle as ever, he set you back on the bed, collapsing on top of you in a sweaty mess that had you groaning.
“Sticky,” you mumbled, “I feel sticky.”
Soobin looked down at you and the mess the two of you made of each other, blinking with confusion on how things had escalated so quickly. Did he do that?
“Sorry,” he pouted, “Do you want to get cleaned up?”
“I think so,” you giggled softly as he reluctantly let you sit up, “How about I meet you back here in a minute?”
Soobin couldn’t think of anything to say and with a silent nod, he let you gather your things and leave.
You weren’t trying to ditch him but you needed to freshen up at least a little bit.
He thought about waiting for you in his bed after he cleaned up after himself but after a while he began to overthink it. Would you actually come back? He understands you’re just a wall away but the distance seemed so far now that he couldn’t help but get up and dressed, following you out his bedroom.
In the process of heading to your room, he stopped in the kitchen to clean up the mess as best as he could for the moment. A soft hum left his lips as he did so and when his eyes landed on a thin piece of lace fabric, he blinked curiously.
With a someone innocent look in his eyes, Soobin picked up your underwear, biting down on his bottom lip to stop a mischievous smile from growing before he shoved them in the pocket of his sweats, unsure what he would do with them later on. A giddy smile plastered his face, dimples on display as he walked toward your room, hearing the water run and he laid in your bed.
“Now, I thought I said I would be back in a minute,” you laughed softly when you came out your bathroom and Soobin just cutely snuggled himself deeper between your sheets and pillows.
“It was too long,” Soobin said as he lifted your bed covers, “Come lay down.”
“I gotta clean out th—“
“I already did,” Soobin whined when you tried walking past him on the bed and with a gentle pull on your wrist, he was leading you onto the bed.
“Did you?” You asked, letting him pull you down until you were laying down next to him, feeling him snuggle into you with his face against your breasts.
“Mhm,” he hummed, his interest caught on the softness of your chest—a place he had neglected when he knew damn well he shouldn’t have.
“Binnie,” you warned when you felt nuzzle into your breasts, squirming against your side, “It’s late already.”
“I know, but your bed… it’s so soft,” he clearly didn’t mean the bed and he thought he was just being a sly bunny, “And you said you would be with me now. Don’t kick me out.”
You could already feel his print press against your thigh, a clear sign that he was getting turned on all over and it was obvious he skipped over wearing anything under his sweats.
A gasp left his lips when he felt your hand palm his erection lightly and unexpectedly, saying to him, “Well, I guess my bed hasn’t been broke into yet.”
Soobin’s hand clutched yours tightly, following you so close that he almost stepped on the back of your shoes everytime you walked. The bar was packed with people and it made his anxiety spike up a bit and feeling your hand in his made him feel slightly better.
“Now don’t get too drunk tonight,” Taehyun said with a laugh as he trailed after you two. Soobin just glared at him, letting you take the lead to order the drinks, eyeing the bartender who was a little too nice to you.
“I don’t plan on drinking too much if he’s the bartender all night,” Soobin mumbled under his breath, hearing the way the bartender talked to you compared to the others. You didn’t pay him any mind but Soobin was watching him too closely that it made Taehyun laugh.
“Relax buddy, you already got Y/n and I don’t think she’s going anywhere,” Taehyun said looking around the bar, waving down Yeonjun who had been search for them all night. Even if your attention was on the bartender, you still held Soobin’s hand, beating him to it when he offered to pay.
“You paid the last two times we went out,” you told him, handing everyone their drink but Soobin was whining.
“But I like paying for you, Taehyun and Yeonjun have their own money,” Soobin said, turning to his friends with a scowl, “Don’t spoil them, only me if you do things like this.”
You laughed, feeling his arm circle around your waist, “It’s okay, come on, my friends are around here somewhere.”
“Hurry up before I puke,” Yeonjun groaned, reminding Soobin that he wasn’t alone with you at home and it made him shy, hiding behind you as you lead the way.
“Wow, Y/n, I didn’t know you were so rizz!” A loud voice yelled out from your side before you were being pummeled back a few steps with large arms around you, jumping excitedly.
“Whoa, rizz!” Beomgyu shouted equally as annoying, making you groan. Soobin smiled nervously as he looked back to his friends who looked just as confused as him. He felt awkward seeing you being hugged by two guys but he tried to ignore it knowing they were just your friends.
“Binnie this is Kai and that’s Beomgyu,” you told him before looking at your friends, “Guys this is Soobin, my boyfriend.”
His dimples showed through and he couldn’t help but smile widely as you addressed him. When you joined his side against he was quick to reach for you, more happy now that you’ve called him that.
“Hello,” Beomgyu stood straight and brought a hand to his forehead as if in salute, “This is our first formal meeting.”
Kai nodded as he took your drink in his own hands, “Yeah, we would have said hi to you when we went to the cafe but Y/n wouldn’t let us because she didn’t want you to know she had a big fat mega obtuse crush on you.”
“Oh my god,” you rolled your eyes at him, “It wasn’t like I was obsessed. I was just, yknow, curious.”
Taehyun put a hand on Soobin’s shoulder, “You see? Y/n liked you then too.”
You spent the night either sitting on Soobin’s lap or dancing with him when he asked you to, and when you went home, he jumped in your bed like he’s been doing since the first night.
… THE END, okay I’m out of text boxes but basically sorry it took my so long to finally drop a Soobin fic but hopefully the length of this makes up for it 😭after drafting a story, hating it, drafting a new story, hating it and repeating the cycle for months, I finally got one finish. please interact and lmk what you thinks… it’s kinda a mess but I tried 🤒
currently writing a chansoo fic where chanyeol is this burnout employee and randomly finds this small town and meets farmer kyungsoo, but he didn't know he was deaf. and ofc a promising amount of angst :D
• masterlist
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☆ (personal fave) | ♤ (fluff) | ♡ (mature) | ♧ (angst)
exo ot9 🪐
▪︎ exo hard hours ♡ (link to everything that has been tagged as ehh) ▪︎ exo headcanons ☆ (link to every exo headcanon i may have shared on this blog) ▪︎ exo reacting to you fangirling over 4th gen group ♤ ▪︎ exo love language ♤ ▪︎ exo + couple matching items ♤ ▪︎ exo making you cry ♧ ▪︎ exo kinktober 2023 ♡ ▪︎ mafia!exo reuniting with you ♤♧ ▪︎ exo reacting to a negative pregnancy test ♧ ▪︎ exo reacting to reader being turned on in public ♡ ▪︎ exo reacting to shy reader meeting their parents ♤ ▪︎ exo reacting to reader being close to their mom/sisters ♤ ▪︎ how exo members would like to receive love ♤ ▪︎ what exo would like to hear from their partners ♤ ▪︎ exo as boyfriends ♤
kim minseok 🐱
▪︎ do not touch ♤♡ (dancer!kim minseok x reader) - 100 celebration
kim junmyeon 🐰
▪︎ notifications ☆♤ (kim junmyeon x reader) ▪︎ mirage of flower ♧ (kim junmyeon x reader) - 100 celebration ▪︎ lotto ♡ (mafia!kim junmyeon x f!reader) ▪︎ our leader is now a dad ♤ (kim junmyeon headcanons) ▪︎ new beginnings ♤♧ (kim junmyeon x reader)
zhang yixing 🐏
▪︎ break my heart ♧ (zhang yixing x reader) - 100 celebration ▪︎ oh, you're so funny... ♤ (zhang yixing x reader)
byun baekhyun 🍓
▪︎ sweet lies ♧ (byun baekhyun x reader) ▪︎ all i got ♤ (bodyguard!byun baekhyun x pregnant!reader) ▪︎ red flag ♤ (byun baekhyun x f!reader) ▪︎ beautiful, beautiful dream ♧♤ (byun baekhyun x reader) ▪︎ say you love me ♡♧ (byun baekhyun x reader) - 100 celebration ▪︎ my first kiss was a little like this... ♤ (byun baekhyun x reader) ▪︎ get you alone ☆♡ (sub!byun baekhyun x reader) ▪︎ so i devout myself ♧ (byun baekhyun x reader) ▪︎ the ballad ☆♤ (byun baekhyun x reader) ▪︎ you make me glow ♤♧ (byun baekhyun x reader) ▪︎ [21:03pm] ♧ (byun baekhyun x reader)
kim jongdae 🦖
▪︎ breaking up with chen ♧ (kim jongdae x reader) ▪︎ i don't even mind ☆♤ (kim jongdae x reader) - 100 celebration
park chanyeol 🍒
▪︎ reckless behaviour ☆♡ (park chanyeol x reader) ▪︎ mad? ☆♡ (park chanyeol x f!reader) ▪︎ chanyeol + breeding kink ♡ (park chanyeol x reader) ▪︎ lilith ♤♧ (demon!park chanyeol x reader) - 100 celebration ▪︎ hey, she's mine! ☆♤ (park chanyeol x reader) ▪︎ good enough ♧♤ (park chanyeol x reader) ▪︎ a damn good feeling ♡ (sub!park chanyeol x reader) ▪︎ the ruler ♤ (park chanyeol x reader) ▪︎ just one more minute ♤ (park chanyeol x reader)
do kyungsoo 🐧
▪︎ fine. ♤ (do kyungsoo x reader) ▪︎ first anniversary ♤ (do kyungsoo x reader) ▪︎ the ring ☆♧ (do kyungsoo x reader) - 100 celebration ▪︎ family dinner ♤ (kim jongin x f!reader x do kyungsoo) ▪︎ bickering, fighting, loving ♤ (do kyungsoo x reader) ▪︎ the store is closed ♤ (do kyungsoo x reader) ▪︎ [untitled] ♡ (do kyungsoo x reader) ▪︎ birthday boy ♤ (do kyungsoo x reader)
kim jongin 🐻
▪︎ dating kim jongin would include... ☆♤ (kim jongin x reader) ▪︎ don't even think about other things ♡ (kim jongin x f!reader) ▪︎ hold me close ☆♤ (kim jongin x f!reader) ▪︎ bite me ♤ (kim jongin x vampire!reader) - 100 celebration ▪︎ family dinner ♤ (kim jongin x f!reader x do kyungsoo) ▪︎ an open letter to jongin... (my personal feelings towards kim jongin) ▪︎ i got you, boo ♤ (kim jongin x reader) ▪︎ really? ♤ (kim jongin x reader) ▪︎ picture perfect ♤ (kim jongin x f!reader) ▪︎ do you love me? ♤ (kim jongin x reader) ▪︎ baby fever ♤ (kim jongin x reader) ▪︎ that was an order ♡ (kim jongin x reader)
oh sehun 🐥
▪︎ you got me so crazy ♡♧ (oh sehun x f!reader) ▪︎ btbt ♡ (oh sehun x reader) - 100 celebration ▪︎ comeback ♤ (oh sehun x idol!reader) ▪︎ the one with the first big fight ♤ (oh sehun x reader) ▪︎ lustful eyes ♡ (oh sehun x reader) ▪︎ falling asleep on sehun's chest ☆♤ (oh sehun x reader)
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“Exception” Mini-Masterlist (ongoing)
✿ ━ Pairing Kim Jongin x Reader, Lee Taemin x Reader ✿ ━ Summary When you’re in love with your taken best friend Lee Taemin, it seems you’ll go to any length to sabotage his current relationship in hopes of snaring his affection for yourself, even if that means teaming up with Kim Jongin, a person who is, technically, his worst enemy…
✿ ━ AUs College!AU, Fake Dating!AU, Love Triangle!AU
✿ ━ Genre Romance/Smut, Detective
Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six Chapter Seven Chapter Eight Chapter Nine Chapter Ten Chapter Eleven Chapter Twelve Chapter Thirteen Chapter Fourteen Chapter Fifteen Chapter Sixteen Chapter Seventeen Ending Alternate Ending Link to its Sequel