Speeches For Dr Frankenstein, Margaret Atwood

― Speeches for Dr Frankenstein, Margaret Atwood

[text ID: you dangle on the leash / of your own longing; your /  need grows teeth]

The Fireplace, 1994

She heard him mumble, and there was something that shifted in her.

What was worse? To be lonely alone, or in a crowded room?

Was it reassuring or painful to know that even when surrounded by people who loved him, Rafayel didn’t seem truly happy?

Yet he really did seem content out here in the forest. With his eyes closed, and how he leaned back, it looked as though he were at least fleetingly at peace. Dolasach soon found herself feeling a little more at peace watching him, and admiring the way the light shone and reflected on his golden adornments, and the mesmerizing sheer fabric of his garb… The three moles on his face made obvious, the brush strokes of his body paint, the length of his eyelashes…

But him speaking meant that she could no longer get away with her accidental ogling, and she went on to place the fruit she’d sliced into the bowls, keeping the servings between them even.

“They are quite inconsistent,” she agreed, watching with interest as he tasted the honeydew melon. To her delight, he seemed to like it; to her surprise, he… Held a slice up for her to eat?

Her cheeks once again matching the color of the peaches she’d just sliced, she gently held his wrist then leaned in to eat the piece he was offering her. And once again, she couldn’t bring herself to make eye contact with him as she bit it and pulled back to chew it properly.

Was it just her, or was it a little sweeter than usual?

What a strange juxtaposition when compared to the words Rafayel was saying.

And the fact that it seemed that what agitated him the most was the fact that the humans spoke ill of the Forest Goddess? And believed that the Sea God had hurt her in any way?

She watched him, paying careful attention to both him and the emotion that escaped his control. The way he seemed so clearly upset, to the point of needing to pause to collect himself—

Something stirred in her heart, an indescribable sensation she’d never felt before. Her brows knit together, but in her eyes was a mix of understanding and something—something she couldn’t really name.

Sympathy, maybe. Mixed with concern, mixed with compassion.

She remained silent until it was clear that he was finished, after his prompting. She hasn’t realized that she completely stopped her own task, so she resumed cutting the mangoes into the bowl.

“It’s… Difficult. You’re right in that the humans are inconsistent. The way I understand it, they even fight amongst themselves in order to somehow prove that one perspective is more correct on the other.”

“But… There’s still some truth to what they’re saying. From what I’ve been able to understand, their stories about the God and Goddess are amalgamations of what happened between all of our predecessors, even before Caspian and Eolchaire. However… They’re still tinged with distortion that comes from inaccurate preservation, and the urge to make more interesting stories.”

She sighed, a sort of somber recollection rendering her gaze distant as she stared blankly at the fruit in her hand.

“They’re… Not exactly wrong to say that the Forest Goddess had once neglected her duties, for example. Eolchaire herself admitted in her writings that during certain periods where Caspian would be gone for longer periods of time, she’d grow despondent to the point of forgoing her duties until she sensed him within the forest again.”

“As… For the fires…” She bit her lip and took in a slow, deep breath.

“I don’t believe Caspian ever did anything. But that doesn’t rule out any of the Gods would came before him who didn’t get along with the Goddess of their generation, and I… I can’t verify anything, because only Eolchaire took the time to record her existence to such an extensive degree. Or at least, her writings are the only ones that managed to survived to today.”

She finally looked up at him, her expression now less torn between grief and uncertainty, and now more akin to something closer to the the assertiveness that came with her exercising her role as a Goddess.

“But… I can’t leave all the blame for the human’s disdain for me to just them. I’ve personally put in the work to make sure they revered me enough to respect the forest, but to make sure they feared the monstrous Goddess hiding amongst the trees.”

₊❏❜ ⋮ i'll chase you to the ends of the earth. ⚬𓂂

@dolasach

He is used to it; however, that didn't mean he accepted it.

Rafayel sighed as he let his head rest against his palm, the same thing being drilled into his mind by the endless sea of words spewing the history of Lemuria and the world on the surface repeated like a broken record from the elders. He seemed to be falling asleep and was immediately scolded for not paying attention.

Evidently, something came up that had the elders leave the vicinity for the time being and this served as an opportunity for Rafayel to escape. He had attempted in doing so a few times, but he was sure that this time he would be able to be successful. 

A blue fish swam around him and held his hand out, allowing the fish to swim over his palm. 

"Shall we head to the surface? It's a little boring right now and I'm tired of hearing the elders saying the same thing over and over again." 

The fish continued swimming over his palm before seemingly directing him toward an opening to which he was able to squeeze through. It was then he realized that he was out of the city walls of Whalefall City and was able to swim to the surface.

He thanked the fish before it disappeared back through the city walls and Rafayel didn't have to think twice as he turned away from Whalefall City to swim up to the surface; however, before he allowed himself to fully come out, he swam slowly as the damn words from the elders rang in his head. 

"The world on the surface is dangerous, even if those people worship our Sea God, there is a chance that someone will try to capture him."

"As the previous Lemurians have..." 

"Rafayel, you must never venture out to the surface world. Your people are here, that is all that should concern you." 

And the annoying part of all. "The Sea God will one day meet the Goddess of the Forest, and when that day comes, should he fall in love with her, it will be the beginning of the downfall of Lemuria."

Rafayel always thought it to be those stories to be something a parent would tell to their child to make them listen. And besides, Rafayel had always been, not only a rebellious soul, but one of sheer curiosity. 

Once he peeked out from the water, he spotted a woman by the shore. And he had seen a few other humans before, but something about her was different and he couldn't help but to swim towards the shore, closer to her. Who could she be? For some reason... he needed to know and while he doesn't know why he needs to, he simply just has to try; in a way, it felt as though there were residual feelings, feelings that weren't from him and that in itself baffled him.

So without thinking, his mouth opened to speak.

"Who might you be? You don't seem... human to me, although you do appear to be." He tilted his head briefly before letting out a laugh. "Ah, apologies. This is bold of me, I will admit."

Random PNGs, part 153.

(1. Dried poppy flower, 2. "Clasped Hands of Robert and Elizabeth Barrett Browning" by Harriet Hosmer, 3. Antique mourning brooch, 4. She-wolf figure from 16th century, 5. "Ogling Skull" by Julien-Adolphe Duvocelle, 6. Chalice of thorns, 7. Fungus Beetle, 8. Rapanui "Birdman boulder" from 1750-1875, 9. Bat tray.)