When I Was 13 My Boyfriends Father Called Me A Nubian Princess. I Didnt Know Where That Was, All I Knew

when i was 13 my boyfriends father called me a nubian princess. i didn’t know where that was, all i knew was that he called me this because i was black. it made me uncomfortable but i smiled anyway.

when i was 13 i was molested by a boy i liked and his friend who were younger than me. i smiled through because i wanted the boy to like me.

when i was 15 i wore a bandana over my natural hair at school and was called into the office because it didn’t represent the school properly, but my friends wore them over their straight hair.

when i was 16 a girl in my class told me there was no way i could be a ni**er or get offended because that was only reserved for dark skinned men.

when i was 17 my boyfriends mother complimented how well spoken i was for someone like me.

when i was 19 i was raped by someone i thought was a friend, and i still can barely remember.

when i was 20 i fell asleep at my boyfriends and while he went to get beer his best friend assaulted me.

at every age i was told how beautiful i was “for a black girl”, how surprising it was that i was so pretty. how absolutely mind boggling it was for me to prefer something other than rap music.

i was never bullied.

i was well-liked.

i had a lot of friends.

i had a lot of male attention.

i had an amazing high school experience.

-but i still had these things happens. no matter how good my experience was i still had bad things happen. we really need to start striving towards a place of understanding and acceptance before we place judgement on each other. it’s extremely crucial to pause and reflect before we start handing out judgement and resorting to harmful actions. everyone has a story much like mine, so instead of hate let’s come together and learning empathy and respect because that is what creates a safer space for everyone.

remember behind every username is a real person, an individual with hopes, dreams, fears struggles just like you. let’s start choosing compassion. let’s stop calling each other names and making accusations…because this divide that keeps happening isn’t doing anyone any good.

again…behind every username is a real person.