Dykeofth3ndless - Dream Of The BITCHless - Tumblr Blog

dead furry detectives 😵‍💫

Signature art for the Dead Boy Detectives crew!

Bonus hanko stamp doodle for Niko:

Charles & Edwin + handing things to each other

BONUS: throwing

charles & edwin + hands♥

Seven years after, I see you again 😚

Painland week day 4: domestic au

Outside Looking In by @dont-offend-the-bees

“So,” said the man. “Didn’t expect you to be out and about, and looking… well. Like you do.” Ronnie raised her eyebrows. “Yes, I…” The lady’s eyes flicked in Ronnie's direction before she cleared her throat. “Thought I’d put my face on for a change. A novelty.” “Well, you look dead fit.” He shot her a mischievous little grin, with a twinkle in his eye far too rascally for a man his age. “Always do, mind.” The lady blushed a little, high on her refined cheekbones. “...Thank you, Charles. You look.” She coughed and bobbed her head. “You look very smart, yourself.” The man – Charles, apparently – beamed, big and bright, and his lady friend’s blush deepened. Ronnie definitely felt like she was intruding, now. But there wasn’t much else she could do about it, save for take her break early and leave the bar unstaffed. And she was far too professional – and nosy – to do any such thing. In which Charles and Edwin's alter egos share a heart-to-heart, and an interested eavesdropper.

Google Docs

Resources for Writing Stories about the Dead Boy Detectives

Resources for Writing Stories about Dead Boy Detectives (tv show) I’m currently procrastinating writing multiple DBDA fics, so I figured i

Having done something similar for Middle-earth, I figured I'd compile useful resources for myself and anyone else who likes to cross-reference canon, etc when writing for Dead Boy Detectives. I hope this is useful!

You know, everyone says that Edwin is a brat, but I have to disagree. Edwin is a bitch, 100% but he's not a brat. You know who is a brat?

CHARLES.

Think about this for a second!

Charles tells the little girl that Edwin’s thing is to “play hard ball” as he’s about to do it, being cheeky and giving away the game. They save Crystal, find out she has some sort of amnesia, and he immediately says she can stay at their office without asking Edwin if it’s okay. And Edwin doesn’t even argue! He’s like, "okay, we don’t usually do that, what the hell, but guess this is a thing right now”.

They bring her back to their office, and he tries to explain that this it’s a bad idea, but notably tries to whisper so as not to wake her up. Even though Edwin doesn't like her and doesn't want her there, he's considerate. Edwin’s entire routine and safe space has been upended by this living girl, so he’s understandably stressed and in a bad mood, but Charles is like, “you’re being bitchy, so I’m gonna go out with Crystal”. They get back and Edwin’s still upset, and then Charles is like, “btw she’s gonna stay” without asking Edwin AGAIN! And AGAIN he doesn’t argue! He immediately asks how long she’s staying for!

Then Crystal reads Becky’s poster and Charles wants to go overseas for a living client, which is all new and Edwin even says that it’s all happening too fast, and they STILL GO! Charles throws Edwin's own worries about Death back at him despite brushing him off earlier, and pulls the guilt trip card of letting Becky die, in front of Crystal, and fucking smiles because he knows he’s won.

And Edwin? He just fucking sighs.

And then once they’re in Port Townsend, Charles sides with Crystal at every turn. He tells Crystal they can find a different way to get the information when the entire point of bringing her was for her powers. He calls Edwin a show-off when he mirror hops, and says it not as an insult, but also without his usual fondness. He says himself that possessing the living "sets off all sorts of alarm bells in the Afterlife", proceeds to do it anyway, then brushes off Edwin’s worries of the consequences. When Crystal yells at them about being scared, he puts her feelings above Edwin’s, who has already been pushed completely out of his comfort zone, and is taking an extra personal risk getting involved with a demon considering he’s on the run from Hell. Even when Crystal’s revealed to have lied about David, and Edwin’s having a complete breakdown, Charles still brings it back around to Crystal.

And this is all just the FIRST EPISODE!!

They are both totally devoted to each other, unquestioningly, but Charles has Edwin literally wrapped around his finger. There's nothing he could ask him to do that he would refuse. He might bitch about it or resist it initially, but he always does what Charles wants in the end.

And Charles seems oblivious and all too aware at the same time. I don't think he has a grasp of how much Edwin would do or how far Edwin would go for him. But he smiles at him and knows he'll cave, and he uses that.

If one of them is a brat, it's fucking Charles.

Rating: T | Word Count: 7312 | Chapters: 1/5 | No archive warnings apply

Wunderkammer, noun. Translated from the German as wonder room and more commonly known in English as a cabinet of curiosities.

HELP WANTED: Maintenance Worker (late hours) Seeking a person of steady disposition and keen intellect. Generous compensation. Room and board available upon request. Not suitable for those possessed of a delicate constitution or nervous temperament. Mechanical aptitude a must, fast runners strongly preferred. Priority will be afforded to candidates with no dependents or other living relatives. Applicants may report to Mr. Edwin Payne, acting head curator and recondite warder of the London Athenaeum. Office hours: 11:30pm – 5:30am, Mondays only.

It’s the weirdest bloody job interview Charles has ever done. Based on the name – seriously, who’s called Edwin these days? – and the stuffy, old-fashioned wording of the advert, Charles was expecting the acting head curator to be a doddery old boy, someone who’s not as handy with a stepladder and a toolbox as he once was. But the lad who opens the door and introduces himself as Edwin Payne can’t be much older than Charles, even if he is dressed like someone’s granddad in a natty little three piece suit. “You’re late,” he says, and makes a disapproving note on his clipboard. “Come in.” Charles steps inside, puzzling over that. Maybe they’ve got him confused with someone else. The advert didn’t include a phone number or any other way to make an appointment, so he’d just waited until after midnight, then, when he was good and sure his parents were asleep, he’d climbed out of his bedroom window and slipped away.

GEORGE REXSTREW as EDWIN PAYNE Dead Boy Detectives (2024) — Season 01, Episode 02

this is the entire show btw

edwin: *says or does something bitchy*

crystal: um?? back me up here charles

charles: me?? charles rowland?? THE wifeguy ever???? fuck that i've been hanging on to every word out of this guy's mouth for the past 30 years and i’m not stopping now. what were you saying, my queen?

[video description and transcript under the cut]

[VD: a scene from Dead Boy Detectives which features three characters: Crystal, Edwin, and Charles. There are white closed captions throughout the video.

Crystal asks a question, and Edwin spins around and struts towards the camera. Yellow text has been edited onto the screen that pops up as he moves. The text reads as follows: “*cunty spin*💅”, “*tuts*😒”, “*pause for the drama*💋”, *struts his whole pussy*👠”, and “THE FUCKING ARMS😭”. The camera then shows Charles and Crystal as Edwin is speaking. Crystal looks at Charles with annoyance at what Edwin is saying, and Charles grins back at her before turning back to grin at Edwin affectionately. Yellow text next to Crystal says “is he fucking serious 🙄”. Next to Charles, yellow text appears saying, “i know isn’t he the best 🥰”, “that’s my wife right there 😍”, “tell us, princess 👑”, and “fuckin love you 😘”. End VD.]

[TRANSCRIPT]:

- [Crystal]: Um, why do I have to babysit?

- [Edwin]: Being a detective is not all invading people’s minds, reading objects, and ta-da, there’s your answer. Sometimes…

AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH MY POOKIE

controversial dead girl detectives take, but i think the translation of charles social dynamics being alive would translate to charlotte who is femme actually (i can and will expand)

So I had a vision of Orbwin in Charles jacket (then waking up wearing it) and it spiraled

I’m normal. 👍

Opening for business!! Need a motivation boost to get writing? Or maybe just want some silly drawings from me? Well now's your chance! All you need to do is write to Netflix or another distrubution company to help #SaveDeadBoyDetectives

Rules/Guidelines:

1. Follow the guidelines outlined here https://savedeadboydetectives.squarespace.com

2. Post your 'sent email' or mailbox drop with the #SaveDeadBoyDetectives and dm me with a link to the post & your request

3. Please be patient with me, I will get to everyone as soon as I can between work & uni <3

payneland spiderman au where masked Charles rescues Edwin, who immediately starts yelling at him for putting himself in danger & Charles is like mate did you recognize me by the sound of my voice🥹?

Edwin using Every Inch of his willpower not to look at Charles ass in spandex is like of course I would recognize you anywhere. you absolute fool.

2 years after they start dating Charles puts it together & laughs so hard he busts a rib

—epic of gilgamesh

payneland spiderman au where masked Charles rescues Edwin who immediately starts yelling at him for putting himself in danger. Charles is like mate did you recognize me by the sound of my voice🥹? Edwin using Every Inch of his willpower not to look at Charles ass in spandex is like of course I would recognize you anywhere. you absolute fool. 2 years after they start dating Charles puts it together & laughs so hard he busts a rib

Drawing my blorbos miserable as I listen to the debate. I wish london was a real place…