I'm Speechless......shit. Yeah, That's It. I Run Out Of Words On How To Describe What I'm Feeling Right

I'm speechless......shit. Yeah, that's it. I run out of words on how to describe what i'm feeling right now.

Addicting Taste Chapter 5

Synopsis: Enishi Yukishiro was on a mission to execute his piece de la resistance. A plan to avenge his beloved sister. Until you showed up. Will you be a part of his downfall or will you try to save him?

Pairing: Enishi Yukishiro x reader

Genre: strangers to lovers, sunshine and sunshine protector, comedic relief, slow burn, a lot of fluff, smut (in premiere)

Word count: 8.9k+

A/N: This chapter was a ride. Parts of it were sitting in my drafts for the past few weeks and I'm happy that it's finally out. Breaking Up With Jesus by Reve is to blame for the way I wrote the smut. Hope the spice is to your liking ;)

Powered by Mackenyu’s outstanding portrayal of Enishi’s character in Rurouni Kenshin: The Final, I hereby present you a story ripped from the figments of my mind. I hope you’ll love the story as much as I do. Enjoy lovelies, Paula.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

Dumplings. Oh, how delicious and soft they all look. Dozens upon dozens laid out ahead, waiting for you to dig in. You reached out for one and another one, and kept going until all you could feel on your tongue was their sweet taste. This was heaven.

As you were sitting on the ground chewing away multiple dumplings at once something caught your eyes. On the right, sitting on top of a pillar, sat a dumpling bigger than the palm of your hand. It looked so plump and you bet your last coin that it tasted delicious. Getting up from the ground you went over to try and grab it but each time you jumped after it the pillar rose higher.

“I’m gonna have you and you will taste amazing," you say struggling to reach for the dumpling.

Putting more force into it you jumped and you got the dumpling off the pillar, floating back down to the ground. This was it. The moment you’ve been waiting for. You lifted the delicacy to your mouth and placed your lips on it to taste it when…

The sound of what appeared to be a pot and a pan hit together woke you up from your dream. You rolled in bed trying to cover your ears with the duvet to stop any more of the noise coming in.

“WHO THE FUCK-“

“It’s time for training,” said a rather enthusiastic Enishi, putting the pots away moving to stand in front of your bed. You opened your eyes to look at him, staring daggers at him violently. No one had the privilege to wake you from your precious dreams. Not even the heavens above.

“Get. the. fuck. out. of. my. room.”

“Someone’s cranky," he said, signature smirk sitting proudly on his face.

Well of course you were cranky. You couldn't sleep after the whole encounter in his office. You made a pact with the devil without thinking it through and it came to bite you in the ass. When you got back to your room you sat on your bed trying to think of a plan of attack and you came up with nothing. You practiced a few basic moves you normally used to get them under control, staying up until the early hours of dawn. So it was no surprise that you were currently annoyed at him for waking you up so early in an idiotic way at that.

“Enishi, I swear to god—“

You didn’t get to finish because he leaned down and took your pillow from under your head in one swift move. The movement made your head fuzzy, letting it fall flat on the bed. He got up just as quickly and ran out of the room with your pillow under his arm.

“I’M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU,” you said as you got up and ran out after him.

You ran around the mansion hallways, closing in on the kitchen area. Stopping on opposite sides of the kitchen island you tried to block off his escape routes. Taking one quick left to fool you into reaching for him only to switch to the right, he successfully avoided your arms. Puffing out your chest in annoyance you took off after him again, following him to his office this time. He stopped in the middle of the room with nowhere to run, shifting to hold your pillow high so you wouldn't be able to reach it. You looked like a cat as you tried your hardest to jump after it.

Focusing too hard on getting back your precious pillow you jumped too high and lost your balance as you came back down. Before you could fall to the floor, strong arms wrapped around you, keeping you steady. Looking up, you saw Enishi’s face mere inches away from yours.

“You’ve got no space awareness at all do you?” he asked, a grin taking over his face. You really weren't in the mood for his antics today.

“Go fuck yourself," you say as you pushed him away. You made your way to the door and stopped when he called your name.

“You forgot your pillow—“ you cut him off whacking him over the head with it, storming back to your room. You had to get ready for the fight of your life.

—————————————————————————

This was it. The moment you would find out if the past weeks of training paid off or not. Nerves were taking over with every step you took. It wasn't too late to turn back and lock yourself in the comfort of your room. But you needed this. You needed to see if there was a chance for you to become the best without bringing her back.

Pushing open the doors to the terrace you stopped on the doorstep. Enishi was already there, stretching his arms, blue kimono resting on the back of a chair. Your hands got stuck on the doors as you thought it through again. You weren't ready, getting cold feet in the worst way possible.

Ah fuck. I can't do this.

Before you could turn around in defeat, a pair of eyes fixed on you. He picked up on your nerves from a mile away and flashed you a soft smile in hopes it would help. He knew this was a lot in such a short time, but he believed in you. He wanted you to get better and if you didn't do well today it wasn't that much of a big deal. You could always try again tomorrow.

His smile felt encouraging, giving you some hope that you could do something productive today. Taking a few deep breaths to slow down your accelerating heartbeat, you stepped away from the threshold of the cooking area, making your way to the middle of the garden. Reaching a few feet away from him you stretched your limbs, mind darting over the moves you practiced. Once you were done you straightened your back and took your place.

I didn't train so hard for nothing. I can do this. Let's beat his ass.

Enishi sensed an energy shift around you. You were ready to go, hands standing on the defensive, body angled for attack. He thought you changed so much in the last few weeks. When he met you that night at the precinct, you looked determined to skewer anyone who crossed you in the slightest. But there was this part of you that was afraid. Getting to know about your past made him understand why. You needed to get out of your head which is why he trained you this way. It only took a small push from his part to make you come out of your shell and he felt proud of what you accomplished so far.

He was proud of you.

Getting into a fighting stance of his own he watched as you started circling him. Your eyes narrowed in on him, preparing to read his moves. Just like he taught you.

"I won't go easy on you."

"I don't expect you to," you said and with that you launched yourself at him.

Lean muscles seared with force as your fist collided with his palm, slightly throwing him off balance. So your strength did get better. Latching his palm on your wrist he pulled you to him, pushing you down to the floor with his other hand. You landed on your hands and quickly hauled yourself back up.

"Your aim improved, but it's still not the best," he said as he charged at you. You ducked just in time, sneaking behind him to land a kick to his side. He reacted fast and turned, catching your leg just before it could hit him. He yanked on it getting you closer to him. You gripped his sturdy shoulders to balance yourself on your other leg.

"Hitting from the back is low, even for you," he said, fingers stroking your leg trying to throw you off balance. Little fucker.

"I wasn't planning on being civil today."

Pulling yourself up using his shoulders, you pushed off the ground and threw your other leg around his torso hanging to him like a koala. Twisting your body around his middle, you used all your force and tugged on your legs to pull him down as your hands reached for the ground. Your move caught him off guard and he almost hit the ground beside you if it wasn't for his annoying amount of balance. He turned his fall into a spin in the air landing in kneeling position, smirking at you. You threw your head back in frustration.

He's reading me too well. I have to change the strategy.

This time you let him come at you. His punches rained from all sides, moving relentlessly to land a blow on you, but you were just too fast for him. You noticed that he put a lot of strength into minimal movement and you used that to your advantage. Your small form proved to be a huge help as you darted around his robust body. He was getting frustrated with your tactic and you were enjoying every bit of it.

"Stop defending and attack!"

"Someone's getting impatient," you smirked. He was getting tired of swinging and that was exactly what you wanted.

He was going a little easy on you but his patience wore thin. He gave you the benefit of the doubt as he thought you were unprepared to take on him but you proved him wrong, pushing his buttons in the process.

Fast punches came your way and you caught every single one of them. The adrenaline that coursed through your body gave you inhuman strength as you pushed him backwards, making him stumble. You matched his pace and turned his own moves on him.

While your ego was filling up, his was slowly cracking. He came at you again, arms tightly clamping down on yours, throwing you off balance. You tried your hardest to get out of his hold but his grip wouldn't budge in the slightest. Locking them even tighter, he swung your arms and sent you flying to the other side of the garden. You landed on your shoulder, pain shooting down your arm. You got too cocky and it backfired on you.

Groaning to yourself, you got back up and rolled your shoulder backwards, wincing at the discomfort. You weren't going to back down, not when when you got this far.

Your marched back to him, slow steps turning into a full sprint. Jumping high enough, you brought your leg down into a kick, which he ducked. You dipped every time he tried to lay his hands on you, delivering a few quick punches to his abdomen that he failed to avoid.

You caught him by surprise as you ducked and swiped your leg behind his to throw him off his feet. Finally, he landed on his back accepting defeat, but not without latching a hand on your arm, tugging you down with him. Your body fell on top of his, arms securely wrapping around you. The feeling of his chest pressed flush to yours made your stomach flutter. You tried to steady your breathing that only picked up the more you gazed into his eyes.

"You did it," he exhaled. A smile took over his features as he looked at you.

"I did it," you said with a giggle as you laid your hand came to rest on top of his chest. His hand that was resting on your lower back trailed up to lightly grip your shoulder, causing you to wince. You suddenly remembered you were in pain. Worry flashed in his eyes as he checked you over, sitting you up.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," you tried to convince him but the frown on your face told him otherwise.

"Let me have a look."

"I said I'm fine- OUCH!" you cried as he touched your shoulder again and you flinched away in pain.

"Stop being so stubborn." He leaned over and took your arm in his, turning it around slowly to avoid causing you more pain. "It looks dislocated."

"What do you mean dislocated?" The adrenaline in your body started to wear off and the throbbing in your shoulder intensified, making you unable to hide it anymore.

"I can put it back, but it's going to hurt. Ready?" Your eyes snapped at him.

"You mean now? Hell no-" he pushed your shoulder back into place using your rambling as a distraction. You cried in pain holding onto it, forehead falling to rest on his shoulder.

"I hate you," you groaned, mumbling into his chest.

"I know you do," he chuckled, rubbing away at your shoulder to try and help with the pain.

"Is this a good moment to tell you we're going on your first mission?" You lifted your head, face beaming with excitement.

"You're joking."

"I'm dead serious. I think you're ready," he said as he got up and gave you a helping hand, gently pulling you to your feet. "I know you probably have a lot of questions, but I think it's best you go get some rest first."

“Okay. I'll swing by later," you said walking towards the kitchen.

"Put some ice on it," he shouted from behind you and you shot him a thumbs up with your good arm.

—————————————————————————

You tried to take a quick nap. Keyword: tried. No matter how hard you tried to sleep you couldn’t contain your excitement. It felt surreal that you were back in business so soon. My first mission here.

Deciding that it was no use to spend more time in bed, you got up and walked to the vanity table. You pulled out your pistols from the top drawer and ran your fingers on the golden rose crests that decorated the frame. They needed a little dusting off and tinkering, but they looked ready for some action. It’s been a while since I put these bad boys to good use.

The golden light filtering in through the window told you the sun was setting. You figured now was as good of a time to go over the plan with Enishi. You made your way to his office, stretching your shoulders to get rid of the previous strain from your combat session.

You thought back to the fight. As much as you improved, you felt like he did manage you a little, at least in some parts. Even if he did, he wouldn't admit it out loud if he wanted to keep his balls in the same place they are now. Anyhow, you were glad you got the opportunity to kick him off his high horse a tiny bit. He could be all "I am the god of martial arts" sometimes, but he knew when to tone it down.

You remembered the proud look on his face as he pulled you to the ground with him was enough to add ten years to your lifespan. There was something about it that made you feel confident in yourself and maybe that was what he wanted to accomplish. He seemed to have this empowering complex, always talking you out of your head when you needed it the most. It was like he knew what made you lock up and what made you open in such a short time and it kind of terrified you. He met the broken version of you all those years ago and now he knows the real you to a certain degree.

But you met him too. The present, real him. The Enishi that doesn't stray away from his goals, who does everything in his power to help people. You didn't want to admit it but he grew on you, latching onto you like a string of hearts. They are plants that need moderate care, often wallowing in sadness when they don't get enough sunlight or water. But looking at them makes you feel hope and warmth. As cold as the veins in their leaves appear to be, the green surrounding them embraces it in the shape of a heart. As weak as its stems look, they try their hardest to hold the hearts up so people can admire them and feel at peace. Enishi is like that too. You connected like the strings of the plant and you didn't want to untangle yourself from him just yet.

Your train of thought was cut short as you came to a halt in front of his office. Knocking on the door he beckoned you in. He was sat at his desk looking over maps and plans. The sleeves of his kimono were rolled up to his elbows, allowing you to see his arms, veins popping and twisting the more he moved his hand around. He looked deep in thought as his eyes were casted down on on the papers in his hands.

"How's your shoulder?" he asked without looking up from his work.

"Better. Thank you." You moved to stand next to him. "So... what's the plan for the mission?"

"There's a mafia playing at a casino in the city tomorrow night. They're called the Dao," he said as he pointed to a few wanted posters laying on the desk. "They're carrying the shipment we... failed to steal a few weeks ago," he continued.

Wait. The shipment I saw them loading off the docks that night?

"The plan is to go in and keep them distracted while the others load the goods onto our carriages. Once they're done we can leave quietly like we weren't even there in the first place." You nodded at all the information you were receiving, but you were failing to see what your role was supposed to be in this plan.

"So what do you want me to do?"

"You'll be inside with me. We're going to buy our way in to the usual poker game they host privately and play them a little."

"That's great actually."

"And why is that?" he prodded, eyebrow lifting in confusion at your sudden excitement.

"I'm great at poker," you confidently stated. He nearly laughed at you if it wasn't for the way you narrowed your eyes at him in a death stare.

"I guess we'll have to see if you are tomorrow."

—————————————————————————

Tomorrow couldn't come fast enough, finding you in a bit of a situation. You had no idea what to wear. The duffel bag you carried was basically your only wardrobe and your outfit choices were limited. Another issue was that you were going to a casino, which called for a little class and finesse.

After wafting through every outfit combination that was sprawled on your bed, you set on a shirt with a corset on top and a skirt matching your red corset. There was just a problem though. You needed help lacing up your corset. In the process of rethinking your outfit for the hundredth time, a soft knock echoed on the door.

“Come in.”

“I came to see if you’re ready,” he said, eyes going wide when he saw you. Your hair was made in an updo, long strands of hair cascading down your shoulders. The cotton shirt showed off your collar bones, while the velvet corset pushed your chest upwards, showing the tiniest sliver of cleavage but not too over-the top. It matched the ruby skirt that fell just a few inches above your knees. He thought you looked breathtaking.

“You have perfect timing. Could you help me lace up this thing?”

“I.. Yeah, sure," he breathed out.

He walked to your spot in front of the mirror and stopped behind you. Fixing your gaze through the mirror, you watched as he picked up the corset strings wrapping them around his slender fingers. He pulled on them until the corset looked tight enough on you but you motioned him to pull it tighter. He laced the rest of the strings up in a bow and smoothed a hand on the crisscross pattern, icy hand coming in contact with your warm back as you dragged in a shaky breath.

“You’re going like this?”

“I don’t really have anything else to wear.”

“Make sure you put a coat on.”

“But it’s a casino. I’m supposed to show off these goodies," you gestured to your chest as he tried his hardest to avert his eyes to somewhere else.

“Coat on or you’re staying here," he said and walked away, leaving you dumbfounded. What has gotten into him now?

The truth was that he thought you were showing a little too much. Once he was out of your room, he leaned on the wall besides the door and released a breath. You looked absolutely beautiful. But that was a sight he wanted to reserve for himself. You weren’t his. But he was damned if he would let anyone else see you like this tonight.

—————————————————————————

The carriage halted and Enishi stepped out first, holding a hand to you. He wore a white shirt under a blue qipao, intricate patterns reflecting in the dim light of the night. You took his hand and he helped you down from the carriage, fingers lingering on yours for a few moments before he let go.

"Is everyone in their places?" he asked Wu, who was driving your carriage. He nodded and left, hiding the carriage in the woods nearby.

"Ready?"

"As I'll ever be."

The casino was on the outskirts of Shanghai, which made escaping a possible mafia war easier. The outside of the building looked like a normal warehouse, but the inside was far from it. Carpeted floors in red and gold greeted you as you walked in, paving the way to the main area filled with sitting booths. A reception bar sat at the far end of the entrance, buzzing with customers. To the right was a corridor that was guarded by armed men. That must be the way to the poker rooms.

You made your way to the bar ordering a drink for you and Enishi, scouting the premises. How are we supposed to get in there without getting broken in half like a toothpick?

Your question was answered as a woman approached Enishi and beckoned him to follow her to the corner. Her blonde hair fell behind her back as she leaned her hand up on the wall, putting all her goodies on sight for him. He replicated her flirty gazes as he trailed a hand up her exposed arm.

Her black corset was laced tightly around her body, pushing her bulky breasts together. You looked down at your own, a little disappointed that you lacked in that area. The high slit on her purple skirt showed off her legs. She wore the tallest heels you've ever seen.

She looked so much more feminine than you and it made your confidence falter slightly. You didn't really care about looks before so why did it affect you so much right now?

You felt really self-conscious ever since you met Enishi. The loose clothes you used to lounge around in changed to tighter fitting clothes. They were better for training, that's what you told yourself. You fixed the bird's nest in your hair more frequently, braiding or putting it up in sophisticated styles. It made training easier, you told yourself again and again.

"Any chance you could get us in there?" you heard him ask the woman as she twirled her hair around her fingers.

"Depends on what you're willing to do for it," she said leaning further on the wall, flaunting her cleavage at him. Can she choke or something?

It wasn't strange that she found him attractive. Enishi was eye candy, holding himself like the gods sculpted him. Who wouldn't want to get a chance to explore the defined physique under his clothes?

He pulled out a handful of money bonded together and handed it to her discreetly. She took the money with a disappointed huff and went on her way to the men on guard. She whispered something to one of them and motioned you to follow her. Leading you down the long corridor she stopped showing you a door with the number 7 crested in golden. Well that was so hard.

After she left, Enishi turned to you seeing you look rather displeased.

"What?"

"Nothing." You leaned a hand on the wall and copied blondie's earlier position, hand on your hip as you batted your eyelashes at him. "Depends on what you're willing to do for it," you say mimicking her annoying voice. He couldn't help the chuckle that escaped him.

"Why are you laughing?"

"It looks like someone is jealous."

"Who? ME?! No. Not me. She can have you for all I care."

"Is that so?"

You nodded determined to show him you weren't affected in any way by the flirty exchange that took place earlier. Sparing you one more look he turned towards the door.

"Let's get this show rolling."

——————————————

The smell of opium hit you like a train, smoke hanging briskly in the confined air of the room. In the middle at a round table sat three men playing poker. You recognised them from the posters on Enishi's desk. The one in the middle was the boss of the Daos, the other two were his henchmen. Armed men sat behind them and around the room, busying themselves with their drinks.

There were no cards on the table yet which meant they just started the game. The dealer was a woman dressed just like the one you encountered at the bar. She looked scared as she mixed the cards, probably because she was here against her will. All heads turned to you as you walked in and sat down in the empty seat at the table.

"This is a private game," said a gruff voice from your right, belonging to the boss.

"This seat is empty, isn't it?" you asked, taking your coat off.

"What does a girl like you know about poker?" the one on your left asked after looking at you, licking his lips of the narcotics he smoked.

"You'd be surprised. Deal me in," you said confidently, hand held out for Enishi to hand you some money. He hesitated at first, but after seeing the determination on your face he sighed and dropped five thick stacks in your hand.

You shot the woman dealing the cards a look. She looked at the boss for approval and he nodded. A curious glint in his eyes told you he was curious about you and how far you could go. He had nothing to lose, especially with the amount of money sitting by your hands.

You quickly figured that the boss was the strongest player. His only flaw was that he bet everything knowing that his men would never go against him. He deemed you a weak player in the first dealings, but that was only because you were holding back on raising your bets on purpose, playing the weak damsel act to buy you some time.

Once you got your fourth card, you dealt all your money in, raising the bet double the amount. You smirked looking at the four cards in your hand, red hearts smiling back at you. A ten of hearts, a jack, a king and an ace. All you needed was a queen and you could play your hand in a royal flush, the highest card combination in the game.

"What's got you so happy, sweetheart?" asked the boss, confused at the smile pulling at your mouth.

"You'll see," you mumbled to yourself as you got your fifth card, completing your hand.

The dealer called the hands and the man on your right went first, placing his cards on the table. He had a lucky three of a kind as he turned to smirk at you. The other man in front of you showed his, grinning as he got a better hand than the other one, a strong full house thrown on the table. These guys were strong players despite having to yield in to their boss.

The boss took a long drag of smoke and smiled creepily at you. He placed down his cards, a straight flush of spades sitting idly on the table. He started reaching for the money in the middle before you cut him off with a look.

Enishi sat behind you, mouth slightly agape, until he took a look at your cards. "You're joking," you heard him mumble before you placed down your cards, a sheer of gasps erupting around the room.

"A ROYAL FLUSH?!" yelled the boss, the men sitting around the table just as surprised. You chuckled and turned to Enishi, a proud smirk taking over his features. You went all in and won against one of the most ruthless mafias in the country. He felt a little embarrassed for second guessing you without seeing you play.

You were about to reach for the earnings on the table as a man stumbled in the room.

"The shipment! It's gone," he said as he approached the boss. The earlier shock on his face was replaced by anger as he stood up to strangle the man, lifting him off the ground.

Enishi tapped on your shoulder, eyes motioning you towards the door. You had to get out of here now, whilst all the attention was on the man being choked. You made quick work of putting your coat on and got up quietly, reaching for the money in the middle of the table, before Enishi stopped you shaking his head. But I won them fair and square, you said with a look. We have to get out of here now, he pressed.

"How did this happen?" yelled the boss shaking the life out of the man. He pointed a trembling finger at you just as you were about to walk out of the door.

"Hold it right there," said the boss cocking his gun at you.

"This was an amazing game," you said with a hand on the door handle. "By the way, YOU SUCK," you yelled as Enishi pulled you down the corridor.

"Did you really have to?"

"The look on his face was priceless," you giggled. You came to a halt in the main area as everyone turned to look at you. The shouts of the boss were heard down the hall as the whole gang closed in on you.

"Don't let them get away."

There were about twenty armed men circling around you and there was only two of you, the only one actually armed being you. You reached for the pistols in the garter under your skirt, sitting back to back with Enishi.

We are so royally fucked.

—————————————

Guns were fired your way and you dodged them, shooting your pistols relentlessly. You managed to reduce the gang members to a half, while Enishi took to breaking limbs left and right.

You were shooting your gun at a taller guy when the clicks on your pistols locked and you realised you were out of ammo. He went to tackle you but you ducked before he could lay hands on you, going for a sweep, knocking his feet from under him. Another one got hold of your coat and you spun around taking it off your shoulders, using your arms to twist it in the man's hold. You pulled on it making him fall forward and you kicked him, projecting him into the bar island. Your coat ripped down the middle from the force. My only coat, gone. You served me well.

The guy got up from the floor and started throwing the glasses sitting on top of the bar at you. You barely dodged a cocktail glass aimed at your head, catching it mid-air. You sniffed the clear liquid recognising it to be vodka and you downed it in one go, throwing the glass behind you.

"That would've been a waste of good liquor." He sneered as he charged at you and you ran behind the bar taking hold of a beer bottle. When he got close you smashed it on his head rendering him unconscious.

Fire was opened again, this time towards you and you sunk to the floor taking cover behind the bar. Enishi joined you from the other side, reeling in next to you.

"What now?"

"We wait until they run out of bullets."

As if on cue the gunfire halted and you got up from your spots taking on the remaining members. Enishi slid over the bar landing a kick to someone's face mid-air. You took hold of a broom and used it like the bo staff you trained with.

Swaying the wooden stick around you cleared the path for him. Two goons jumped at you, trying to take your weapon. You were busy holding one of them off trying to shake his hands off the broom and failed to notice the chair heading straight to you.

"Miyu, watch out!" You turned just before it smashed into your back and dodged out of the way, letting the chair fall straight into the guy you were fighting off, both of them knocking into each other.

Enishi was fighting another pair. One of them pulled out a knife and tried to stab him. You intercepted the sneaky attack and caught his hand, kicking the knife away before yanking him towards your fist. He punched the other one and they both fell to the floor in sync.

You looked around at the mess you caused, trying to get your breath under control. The boss was nowhere to be found and you assumed he scurried off somewhere with the tail between his legs.

Spotting it among the pile of bodies, you went and picked up the shreds of your coat from the floor, smoothing a hand over it. Enishi took off his qipao and put it on your shoulders heading to the exit, without saying anything.

—————————————————————————

He didn’t speak a word on the way back. The only gestures he made were to direct Wu to take you back to the mansion. He didn't even look at you when you asked him about the mission. All he did was sit in complete silence, eyes closed in meditation, jaw clenched in irritation.

You went over everything that happened back at the casino. The blonde flirting with him, the poker game, the fight. Nothing stood out enough to be a problem and you certainly didn't do anything wrong, besides taunting and stealing off a mafia boss. Regardless, his silence was driving you crazy to say the least.

Why do I even care? I went and did my job and we finally got the weapons. What could possibly make him this mad?

You were snapped out of your thoughts as the carriage came to a halt in front of the mansion. Enishi quickly got off without sparing you a look, leaving the door open for you to get out yourself.

Wow. Fucking diva.

You stepped down from the carriage with the help of Wu and took off after him. You were determined to find out what made him this mad. His steps were fast like he wanted to get away from you but you weren't going to give him the satisfaction. You weren’t going to let him push you away again. He opened the door to his room and before he could close it shut you sneaked in.

He stopped in the middle of the dimly lit room, shoulders rolled in annoyance. You took in his room from your place by the door. His room seemed to be a mirror of yours, the only difference being that his was as dark as room décor could get. The cool light of the night washed the room in an even darker shade, currently reflecting its owners mood.

“Why are you here?”

“I want to know why you’re mad at me.”

“I’m not mad at you.”

“Cut the bullshit, Enishi. You haven’t said one word on the way back. Did I do something wrong?”

With a sigh he turned around to face you. His eyes were visible to you even in the heavy darkness. They seemed to drink you in with greed, debating on whether he should say something or keep the thoughts raging in his head quiet. He settled on the former, the adrenaline of the fight still pumping through his veins. If he didn't say anything now he knew he would regret it forever.

“You didn’t respect the plan,” he said taking a step towards you. “We were supposed to go in and get out,” another step, “not provoke a fight,” he stopped in front of you.

“Fuck the plan! We had them right in the palm of our hand. We got what we wanted, right? What else matters?”

“You! You matter,” he growled as he closed the distance between you, pinning you to the door. “You… drive me up the fucking wall,” he said as he settled both of his arms on either side of you.

“What?” you mumbled under your breath.

“I can’t take it anymore,” he exhaled and the next thing he did caught you by surprise. Warm lips landed on yours, moving with burning desire against your clueless ones. Your eyes widened in surprise and you froze, leaning a hand on the wall behind to keep you steady.

“I’ve been wanting to do this for so long,” he said as he pulled apart just enough for you to get a breath in, before he leaned in again, this time with much more hunger.

It was like your body caught on fire. You didn’t know what you were supposed to do so for the time being you settled on kissing him back. His hands moved from beside you to card through your hair, the other moving to sit at the base of your neck, pushing your face impossibly closer to his. His breaths were running wild across your skin as he moved down to your neck. Every kiss leaving his mouth was tightly sawn into your skin making your breaths heavier.

You craved and were afraid of his touch at the same time. Enishi could be both gentle and rough and you had no idea which one was sitting before you right now. Your mind was in constant tug of war between restraint and giving in to him. He didn’t let you wallow in your thoughts too much as a butterfly kiss to your collar bone brought you back to earth. He stopped and looked at you to make sure this was something you wanted too. Tracing your eyes to his, you saw the previous hunger in his eyes turned into sincere want. That was the only confirmation you needed to know as to which Enishi was with you right now, wasting no time in capturing his lips, a little rougher than he did.

Your mouths fought for dominance, none of you wanting to give in and submit to the other. The way his fingers worked to undo the corset he tied up for you just a few hours ago turned you on and you couldn’t wait anymore.

“Rip it off,” you whined.

“After I struggled so hard to tie it up—“

“Enishi, I don’t give two flying fucks. Rip it to fucking shreds.”

“Someone’s getting impatient,” he chuckled. Seeing you so worked up amused him. He didn’t want to make you wait any longer so he untangled his fingers from the strings and in one brisk move he pulled apart your corset, breaking it in two together with the white shirt underneath. The poor pieces of fabric fell to the floor, revealing your chest.

He revelled at the sight before him. You were exactly what he imagined in lewd fantasies at night, when his head was webbed with only thoughts of you. What set him on fire the most was that he knew you thought of him in that way too. Your eyes gave you away way too many times for him to not take notice of it. He just hid his a lot deeper so you wouldn't notice it. He failed to keep the thoughts away each time his hand found yours, or your waist, or your face.

You consumed him and you didn't even know it.

Tracing his hand down your arm made tingles dance all over your body. You couldn’t take his teasing anymore, not when you were this bare in front of him. If he's not going to move, I’ll do it myself.

With maddening frustration, you launched at his lips, capturing them wildly like they were the very essence of life. He responded to your attack with pleasure rolling off his vocal chords grunting into your mouth. Taking the opportunity, you pressed your hands on his clothed chest and ripped away at his shirt too, soft cotton turning into a mere rag as you pulled at it. Enishi was taken aback by your rawness and broke the kiss just enough to take another breath to be able to fight your mouth for his share of dominance.

He pulled you closer to get the skirt off of you just as you worked on his pants. You didn’t even notice you were already leaned back on his bed, spread wide for him to see all of you. Thoughts of every fantasy he had of you were spinning around in his head and he struggled to pick just one.

“Draw a picture it will last longer,” you say sitting up on your elbows.

“I’m gonna fuck this attitude out of you.”

“I’d like to see you try.”

The whole thing turned into another competition you both couldn’t get enough of. He wasn’t going to back down and neither were you. Most girls got shy whenever they saw this hunk of a man stand above them, ready to turn them to whimpering wrecks. But you weren’t most girls and you planned on showing him that.

He was spending too much time observing you and you were growing desperate. Deciding to take the reins, you sat up to mirror his kneeling position on the bed and laid your hands on his chest, pushing him backwards until he fell on his back. Straddling his lap, you leaned down to take in his gasps of surprise in a chaste kiss. A kiss so slow that it made his insides burn with lust.

“Miyu, stop fucking around,” he groaned between kisses.

“That’s what you were doing a minute ago,” you say smirking through the kiss. He responded by raking his hand through your scalp and gently pulling at it, drawing a moan from you.

“I love seeing you this needy for me," he said, biting down on your lip. "I haven’t even done anything to you yet and here you are, ready to pounce on me if I don’t give it to you.”

You were begging. All for someone who’s never touched you to do just that. Because you knew he would do it exactly the way you wanted.

Enishi was chaos. He was like a drug to you, a damn good one at that. Once you got a tang of it you kept wanting more. The more time you spent with him the wilder your delusions got and you realised you were addicted to his taste.

You continued the makeout session, rolling around in the bed, tongues fighting for power. You sat on his lap, skillfully pushing into him without a breath. Every time you came up for air he pulled your head back down to him. He was just as addicted to you.

“My turn,” he smirked taking your lips in his. His hands trailed down your shoulders to your chest and he held your breasts, softly squeezing them. It turned you on beyond repair and you couldn’t help the whines escaping your throat.

“What do you want me to do?” he whispered, lips stopping a few inches away, teasingly grazing yours.

“Anything,” you replied, moving your head up to catch them, failing as he moved away from you. You dropped your head on his pillows, feeling lightheaded from the anticipation. He could do whatever he wanted to you as long as he did something.

“I need words, Miyu.” The way he spoke your name made goosebumps raise on your arms. His voice alone managed to undo you.

“I want you to ruin me. Take me to God or to Satan for all I care.”

He didn’t waste any more time and took to trailing the most teasing kisses down your body, from the dip in your neck down to your navel. He savored every part of you like a priest chastising the Sunday mass. He preached your body like a prayer, prepared to sink you in the depths of his hell. He only knew sin and he was going to taint you in his darkness tonight.

His kisses got slower the closer he got to your throbbing core, the part that was aching for him the most. You couldn’t believe he was performing your wildest dreams. You made the mistake of rubbing your legs together to create some friction, wanting him to touch you already, only to have him pull your knees apart spreading you back out. He caressed your thighs, fingers running from the base of your knees all the way to your hips, missing your core by just a few inches. The waiting was driving you mad, turning you into a whining mess.

“Enishi, stop messing around.”

“I haven’t even started darling.”

Securing a hand around your torso, he dipped down to kiss your thighs the same way his hands caressed your legs. His kisses stopped just before your opening and he blew on it, making you shudder under his hold. With one more look at your face, he dove into you. He worked his skilled tongue inside your walls as you wrote your moans in his pillows, gripping the sheets tightly. The hand on your torso rubbed circles on your stomach adding to the ecstasy you were feeling. You surrendered your body to him, letting him worship you the only way he knew.

His strokes turned haste as you neared your release. You came fast and he devoured your juices like it was the nectar of the gods, leaving no drop go to waste. You were seeing stars, sweat sticking to your skin as the heat became too unbearable. The only light in the room came from the moon and as dim as it was it was blinding you, senses overwhelmed by the man at your feet. He came up to capture your lips, letting you taste yourself the way he tasted you. He wanted you to know how good you were and how much he wanted to savour you.

“Enishi…," you gripped his head and kissed him arduously. "Fuck me," you begged and that was enough to finally get him going.

“You don’t have to tell me twice.” With a swift kiss he slid inside you, length stretching you out sore.

He pounded into you at the speed of light. You closed your eyes to get rid of the stars you were seeing, but he made you to look at him. He wanted watch as he broke you apart and put you back together.

“Be a good girl. You can take it.”

His praises made your body quiver as he annihilated your insides. He was a god in bed, toned body shining in the moonlight as he took you to heaven. But he was also a devil, his thrusts branding his name inside of you like a mark. The more he delved in the better the pleasure he gave you. He knew exactly how to make you feel just right and you felt a surge of energy taking over as you flipped your bodies.

"My turn," you said, wanting to make him beg for you like you begged for him. Calloused hands worked their way up your sides as you took his lips once more, sitting on top of his lap. Your hands were messing around in his hair, grabbing at it every time he bit your lip.

You chased the dips in his neck with sloppy kisses, hands digging into your sides. Your hands massaged and pulled at his hair, moans rolling off his tongues like music. Your touch felt divine, awakening his cold body like the first sunlight of spring. He wanted you to be the queen of his hell, to fall in and out of grace together.

"I need you," he grunted. He got so turned on by this savage part of you and he didn't want to admit it, but it made him so weak. He craved all of you, even if he had to swim in your ocean endlessly just to find every piece of you.

"Your wish is my command," you said, sinking down on him with a grunt, feeling him stretch you out again. Once you felt comfortable you started rolling your hips, a string of curses leaving his mouth.

You were taking your sweet time and he felt you going agonizingly slow. His hands gripped your hips to move you faster and faster until your rhythm grew frantic, leaning to support yourself by his shoulders. Your head was spinning as you felt yourself come close to your release for the second time tonight.

"Enishi," you whispered breathlessly.

"What do you need?" he asked, fingers grazing your ear softly.

"You," you say seizing his lips. Your pace picked up as your moans combined in each other's mouth. He was twitching inside you, sign he was close too.

He would do anything if he could have you on top like this all the time. He would let his pride go to shit if he could feel you like this again. To see your hair stick to your face, locks tangled over your shoulders. To have your hands grip him like he was your lifeline. To see your eyes lost in the abyss that is him as you come undone together, bodies intertwined drunk on a high, on top of his bed.

—————————————————————————

Warmth. That's what you were feeling right now. Muscular arms held you securely, gaze focused solely on you. One of his hands was stroked your hair in a gentle rhythm, head laid on his shoulder as you stared at the ceiling. A piece of your hair fell over your face and his hand moved to place it behind your ear, his husky voice breaking the comfortable silence.

"Why are your ears so small?" he asked poking fun at you, only to get kicked in the shins by your leg. "Okay, I deserved that."

You turned around and his eyes caught a glimpse of something behind your ear. A tattoo. His fingers smoothed over the skin, making out the word yume. And there he thought you couldn't surprise him more than you already did tonight. He reached for your hair to move it out of the way to get a better view at the inkwork. His eyes turned curious as he ran his hand over the mark.

"Yume," he whispers, just enough for you to sense the question on his tongue.

"It means dream. I got it done before I left Japan," you sighed.

"Why yume?"

"I didn't have any dreams for myself. I still don't. All I wanted was to find my parents and that felt like a good enough dream at the time," you said, eyes slightly tearing up at the memory of your parents.

"But as I got older it became something that drove me. I suddenly wanted to find a dream for myself just so I can give this life meaning."

Silence hung in the air again as he mulled over the information. He wanted to know more about what happened to your parents but this definitely wasn't the time to ask. You were too vulnerable right now and he didn't want to pry into your head more than you did it to yourself.

You got up from the bed, his shirt sitting snugly around you. Stretching your sore body, you headed towards his bathroom. You noticed that blue was a recurring aesthetic in the place. The finish on the sink was just like yours, the only difference being that it was dressed in dark motives. He bathroom had a shower in the corner, surrounded by black granite tiles and a glass wall.

"Any other tattoos I should know about?" You turned around to him. He had his arms behind his head, biceps flexing the more he leaned back. The duvet covered his lower part, chest fully exposed to you. You bit your lip as you looked at him.

"If you join me for a shower I might just tell you," you giggled, leaning against the frame of the bathroom door.

"You can say that again," he said as he got up from his bed and ran to you, picking you up in his arms.

"PUT ME DOWN YOU'RE SWEATY!"

"SO ARE YOU BUT YOU DONT HEAR ME YELLING ABOUT IT."

"You're so annoying," you said, linking your arms around his neck so you wouldn't fall.

"That's not what you were moaning a few hours ago, babe," he said walking towards the shower with you in his arms.

"Eww, don't call me babe."

"Sure... babe," he smirked.

"Oh, dear lord."

—————————————————————————

Thank you for reading! As always, comments, notes and reblogs are welcome :)

Spending time with his baby!

He's such a green flag.

---

Rereading this because it's so good.

death before decaf

opla!zoro; 10,414 words; coffee shop/college!au, vague enemies to lovers, fencer!zoro, sports medicine!major reader, slightly ooc zoro (he's a bit more talkative), fluff and flirting, bff!robin, zoro makes the first move, zoro calling reader "princess", mutual pining, both reader and zoro are dumbasses, making out in locker rooms

summary: sanji and nami bet on how long it'll take you and zoro to finally crack over your caffeine-related discourse; or -- that one coffee!shop zoro au that literally no one asked for.

a/n: i keep on saying "this is the longest fic i've written to date" but this really is the longest fic i've written to date. and no, this will not be the only time zoro calls reader "princess" in one of my fics. trust.

one.

“How long did you say?”

“Two weeks, max.”

“Nah… you think?”

“Probably closer to a week. Week and a half.”

Sanji stubs out his cigarette on the bottom of his shoe before tossing the smoking nub into the bin, casting Nami a disbelieving look.

“They’ve been going on like this for like three months… and you think they’re gonna crack in the next week and a half? Nah, fam — I call bullshit.”

Nami shrugs, smirking, “Your funeral.”

Sanji scoffs as Nami pushes through the swinging double doors into the main body of the cafe, hitching a smile onto her face as she greets the customers already lined up in front of the counter.

“Yeah, whatever,” he mutters to himself, dusting his hands off on his apron before pushing in after her, putting on his best customer-service smile.

“Mornin’ folks! Welcome to the Straw Hats Cafe, where the coffee’s hot but the people are hotter — what can I get started for you, sweetheart?” he grins as he shoots you a wink and you flash him your best Colgate smile.

“Can I get a decaf latte with —”

“Oat milk, two pumps of caramel, and whipped cream on top? Oh — and a sprinkle of cinnamon cause you can’t have a fall latte without cinnamon, right?” Sanji finishes for you.

You nod, your cheeks flushed a bright, wind-kissed pink from the cold outside.

Behind you, a green-haired boy in a tight-fitting tee and no jacket scoffs under his breath, shaking his head.

“Yep! You know me so well,” you say, giggling and making a point to speak just a bit louder.

“Course I do, darlin’. It’s what I get paid for,” Sanji jots down your order and pushes it to the side where Nami’s already halfway done with making your drink.

“Ah, if it isn’t my favorite mosshead jock — lemme guess, double espresso, no sugar, no nothin’, right?” Sanji punches in the order just as Zoro makes his way up to the counter, his eyes narrowed.

“Yeah.”

Sanji grins, hiking an eyebrow, “Talkative as always, I see. Alright — that’d be —”

Zoro wordlessly slides a full punch card onto the counter and Sanji pauses.

“Ah — pardon me, I do believe that’s your free drink! You sure you wanna use it on an espresso? Maybe… you wanna try one of our seasonal specials? The maple spice latte’s one of our best —”

Zoro scoffs again, “I’m good. I like my coffee real, thanks.”

Down passed the pastries, you roll your eyes, making an exaggerated face as Nami hands you your drink with a grin.

“Y’know, if you guys just made out I feel like it would fix a lot of this unresolved tension,” she says, even as you nearly choke on your drink.

You’re still coughing when Zoro joins you by the finished drinks counter.

“I’d rather lose an eye than make out with someone who drinks decaf.”

Nami sighs, shooting you a meaningful look as she slides the double espresso toward Zoro.

You wipe your lips with a napkin before leveling him with a glare.

“Well I’d rather gouge my own eyes out than make out with someone who never grew out of his middle school emo-phase.”

“At least I don’t try to use sugar to fill the gaping hole in your life where a real personality should be.”

“At least I don’t make that gaping hole my entire personality.”

“Princess.”

“Edgelord.”

You turn resolutely away from Zoro and smile back at Nami and Sanji, both stealing glances at the pair of you even as they continue to handle the Monday morning rush.

“Thank you guys — I’m gonna be late for class.

Zoro tsks, taking a sip of his espresso.

“I’m gonna be late for practice.”

You huff, pivoting away from him towards the door, purposefully letting it swing shut behind you; Zoro swears as it almost makes him spill his coffee.

Back in the coffee shop, Sanji finishes another order just as Nami washes off her hands to take over at the cashier.

“One and a half weeks?” Sanji asks as he rolls up his sleeves and grabs a few metal cups for steamed milk.

“Yep,” Nami replies, shooting another look out the glass door where they can both still see your’s and Zoro’s silhouettes as you head towards the university campus, “Just about.”

“Alright then, you’re on.”

Nami’s smirk only grows, “Like I said — your funeral.”

two.

You’re fuming all the way to your first morning class — Bio-Organic Chemistry — that you don’t notice your friend Robin until she’s standing right next to you.

“Are you mad at your fencer-boy again?”

You roll your eyes, huffing out a breath, “He’s not my fencer-boy, and no. I’m not mad.”

Robin grins, “Your tone says different.”

You cast her a reproachful look, “I just… bumped into him at the coffee shop again.”

“Ah,” Robin says, her voice saturated with understanding.

You groan, “He just… pisses me off so much! Like, why’s he care how much sugar I put in my drinks or if I drink decaf? He’s just a muscle-head loser who thinks drinking espresso shots makes him somehow more manly or something. Ugh.”

Robin’s grin is amused when you turn to chance her a glance.

“Then… why do you care how he takes his coffee?” Her question is light, but you’ve known her for long enough to know when she’s teasing.

“I didn’t! At least… not until he made fun of my drink first. I mean, who does that anymore? We’re in college! Like, grow up!”

“Mm,” Robin hums, schooling her expression into one of careful consideration and marked compassion, “and of course, you’re just engaging in his… childish antics because he started it first, right?”

You sigh, cupping your very sugary latte between your palms as you both duck into the main lecture building, teaming with students shedding scarves and jackets, shaking off the late autumn chill.

“I know, I know it’s stupid but… he just… pisses me off so much!”

Robin chuckles, her smile distinctly sphinx-like as you press your lips into a pout.

“Well, we can talk about it after morning lecture, hm?”

You sigh and nod, waving her off as she heads down the hallway towards her Ancient Worlds class and you head upstairs for the sciences.

You spend the whole lecture in a mood and by the time you’re excused, your temples have started to throb.

But true to her word, you find Robin waiting for you at the bottom of the stairs, a thick leather-bound book clutched to her chest. You give her a questioning look.

“Just some light reading,” she says. You roll your eyes.

“Just say you’re a gigantic nerd and go.”

At this Robin laughs, falling into step next to you as you both start to make your way towards the dining commons.

“Have I ever denied that I was?”

You let out a noncommittal grunt.

Luckily, the commons isn‘t as crowded as it usually is and you both quickly find a seat.

“So,” Robin says as she slides into the seat next to you, propping up her chin on the heel of her hand. There’s a low, lilting tone to her voice that tells you there’s no getting out of it this time.

You sigh again, pursing your lips, staring down at your açaí bowl.

“So what?”

“Tell me about him.”

You scoff, “Not really much to tell — he’s… one of the fencers on the national team. So obviously, he’s got his own head shoved so far up his ass he can probably watch his own lunch dige—“

“So he’s quite good at fencing then.” Robin keeps her voice neutral, taking a contemplative bite of a banana.

“I guess — I mean we’re the top feeder school for the Olympic team, aren’t we?” You jab your spoon into the yogurt, nearly splattering Robin’s new book. She gently tucks it into her bag and motions for you to continue.

“I dunno, there’s not much to tell after that… he’s an arrogant jock who judges people by how they take their coffee,” and at this, you shove a large spoonful of yogurt and açaí into your mouth, glaring at nothing in particular.

“Doesn’t your practical applications class look after the fencing team?”

Again, you grunt, sinking a bit further into your seat at the thought.

“Yeah, I’ve been dreading that all morning, and the class isn’t till Wednesday.”

Robin’s smile is almost too academic as she carefully finishes her banana and gets started on an egg salad sandwich.

“It can’t be that bad, can it?”

You sniff, swallowing another huge mouthful of yogurt.

“It can,” you say, grimacing, “You should see the number of times I’ve had to hold back from dislocating his shoulder on purpose.”

Robin laughs her tinkling, all-knowing laugh, “Every day, I wake up glad to be on your whitelist.”

Your lips twitch into a reluctant grin.

“I’d be nicer too if I were as tall and pretty as you are. But since I’m not one of god’s strongest soldiers, I’ve gotta find other ways of defending myself, y’know?”

“I’m not sure what you do can be called ‘self-defense’ in a court of law but…” she smiles, “You shouldn’t sell yourself short either.”

You cast her a deadpan look, “But I am short. It’s like where 90% of my rage and spite come from.”

Robin grins, “You know that’s not what I meant.”

You make a rather childish face, but a comfortable warmth spreads from the center of your chest out towards all your extremities at Robin’s words. She cocks her head and continues.

“Plus… I’ve a creeping suspicion that your fencer-boy would agree that you’re prettier than you think.”

You freeze mid-swallow on your last spoonful of yogurt, eyes wide.

“Wait — what?”

Robin sighs, looking at you as if studying a particularly interesting monolith carved with all her favorite dead languages. You sit back, crossing your arms, feeling raw beneath her inquisitive gaze.

“You can’t still think that this little… feud you two have is purely based on a difference in coffee preference, can you?”

You realize you’re chewing on your bottom lip and force yourself to stop.

“I — I don’t know how it can be anything else though…” but even to your own ears, you sound distinctly unconvinced. Robin cocks her head.

“Think about it — when we were all little kids and running around on playground, which girls would get their pigtails pulled the most?”

Your frown deepens, “But we’re not kids anymore and this isn’t a play —“

“Yes, I know. Just humor me for a moment.”

You squirm in your seat, your heart thudding erratically in your rib cage, making you feel strangely breathless.

“It was… always the girls that the boys had a crush on,” you answer, your voice growing smaller with each word as the realization seeps into your skin like sunlight. And suddenly, it's too hot. The thought that Zoro might be doing this because he likes you isn’t something that’s crossed your mind. Or rather, it isn’t a thought you’d allowed to cross your mind.

“You know, boys aren’t technically considered ‘men’ until they’re in their mid-thirties,” Robin says, conversational and satisfied to have driven the point home to you. She leans back even as you reach up to press your face into the palms of your hands.

“But…” you try to grasp for some thread of logic that might be able to refute Robin’s claim but come up empty. She’s always been too smart for her own good. And yours.

When you finally lift your head again, it’s to find Robin still watching you, an oddly indulgent smile on her lips.

“C’mon,” she says, gathering her things, “don’t want you to be late for your next lecture.”

She has the audacity to wink as you hurriedly grab your stuff as well.

“Shut up,” you say, bumping her lightly with your elbow as you walk passed her, cheeks darkening with every step. Your next lecture, you both know, is the Nutrition of Sports — which is one of the few actual classes that you and Zoro actually share.

“Have fun in class!” Robin calls as you split ways outside the dining commons. You consider flipping her off but decide against it and opt to stick out your tongue at her instead.

Robin shakes her head, laughing quietly to herself. Really, she thinks, this is just starting to get interesting.

three.

You walk into Nutrition of Sports fully prepared to see Zoro slouched in his usual seat at the back of the class — except, he’s not there. You blink; he’s always been there, always early despite what others might assume of his punctuality. And yet.

“Lookin’ for me, Princess?”

You jump as you hear Zoro’s voice behind you, dangerously close to your ear. Jerking around, you find him smirking, arms crossed as he stares at you.

“N-no.”

“Tch.” He saunters into the room, his arm barely grazing yours as he drops into his seat, leaning back with a sort of damnable, feline grace, doing nothing to hide a huge, lethargic yawn. When he makes a show of stretching his arms over his head, you pause as you notice the way he winces, favoring his left side over his right.

You narrow your eyes.

“You’d be a shit poker player,” he says, grinning as he turns his eyes back towards you, catching you staring before you flush a deep purple and stomp towards your own seat, just one row ahead of him.

You noisily start setting up your supplies — an endless parade of jelly pens and perfectly coordinated sticky notes in aesthetically pleasing colors — pretending like you hadn’t heard him.

Thankfully, the professor hurries in soon after as the rest of the students file in.

Halfway through the lecture, you’re stifling the third yawn of the hour as you feel a small, crumpled something hit the back of your neck. You jerk around to find Zoro ducking behind his arms even as you spot the small wad of paper that he’d obviously just tossed at you.

You bend down to pick it up, only to find a note scribbled in slanted, uneven handwriting —

Sugar crash? Ha. Serves you right.

You nearly whip around but the professor clicks another slide and drones on. You huff, flipping the paper over to scribble on the back —

What happened to your arm?

You surreptitiously toss the note back to him and grin to yourself as you hear him sputtering behind you. The professor glances towards you. You flash him a winning smile as you continue to jot down notes; behind you, you hear the distinct sounds of Zoro scrambling to appear as if he’s paying attention.

The rest of the lecture goes by uninterrupted, though by the end, you swear that your hackles are raised from the way Zoro’s been staring at the back of your neck the entire time.

“What?” you ask, whipping around to face him.

Zoro, for his part, has the decency to look sheepish as he clears his throat and sighs, leaning back.

“There’s nothing wrong with my arm,” he says as he looks away, a slight darkness dusting the high of his cheeks. It’s not the first time you notice the bone-chiseled features of his face — like some gorgeous, careless god, rendered by the loving hands of a besotted Renaissance artist and preserved for the world to see — the way a constellation of freckles scatter across the bridge of his nose, the way his jaw is sharp enough to sting the imagination.

“Right. Fine. Sorry I asked.” You shove your notes and pens back into your bag, rolling your eyes as you shoulder your tote, “And… you’d be a shit poker player too.”

And with that, you turn and leave the room without a single backward glance.

You’re gone so quick that you don’t see the way Zoro stares after you, his own eyes narrowed into slits. You don’t see the way he frowns as one of his teammates nudges him with an elbow, reminding him that afternoon practice starts in 15 minutes.

four.

Tuesday night finds you slumped over a stack of books on the 3rd floor of the library, your entire body feeling odd and boneless. Hundreds of tiny flashcards are scattered across the top of the desk, each filled with a system you have to memorize before your test on Friday for your O-Chem course, when suddenly, a white paper cup appears in your field of vision, plopping onto the tiny slip of table still available between all your study materials.

“Hm?” you jerk up, blinking blearily up at a vaguely familiar green-haired figure even as he crosses his arms and sighs.

“There. Some real coffee. Looked like you need it,” Zoro says, glancing away the moment your eyes come into focus.

You stare at him for a solid ten seconds before looking back down at the cheap, watered-down cup of unsweetened coffee on the table before you.

Ew, you want to say, but somehow, “Thanks,” is what comes out of your mouth.

You reach for the cup, wincing slightly as you jerk your fingers back from the scalding exterior of the thin paper cup.

Zoro immediately leans down, snatching the cup from the table to blow on the surface. You watch him with wide, wondering eyes. It takes him a second to catch himself before he blushes a deep shade of maroon and clears his throat, quickly setting the cup back down on your desk, tucking both his hands into his pockets, looking anywhere but directly at you.

“It’s — careful — I mean — it’s from the vending machine downstairs so it’s not as fancy as the stuff we get from the coffee shop —”

Maybe it’s because you’re truly too tired, or maybe because Robin’s been right since day one but — you reach for the cup, carefully cradling it between your palms as you take a tentative sip and grimace at the watery, bitter aftertaste.

“Gross,” you say, though without any malice, glancing up at him. Zoro scoffs, dragging out an empty seat across from you, turning it around to straddle the chair, propping both his arms on the back as he looks at you. Your eyes once more catch on the way he’s gentler with his right side.

“What’s wrong with your arm?” you ask again, taking another tentative sip of the truly awful coffee.

Zoro grimaces, “None of your business.”

You sigh, the will to snark back rather feeble as you consider the mountain of vocab you have to memorize before your Friday test.

“Right, sure — keep your secrets,” you drone as you set the paper cup down and nudge it further away from you, “be mysterious for the next —” you check your watch, “eighteen hours before Practical Applications when you’ll have to explain to Coach Mihawk why you've been lying about an obvious injury three weeks before your next —”

“Fuck — okay.”

You pause, looking up from collecting your flash cards.

Zoro digs his fingers into his right shoulder.

“I — I think I pulled it at the tournament last week.”

Your eyebrows shoot up, “Your tournament was on Thursday.”

Zoro shifts uncomfortably, “And?”

“And it’s now Tuesday.”

Zoro doesn’t answer this time, but you have to actively fight down the urge to throw the no-longer-scalding-but-still-very-hot-coffee at his face. You tell yourself that the only thing stopping you is professionalism and sportsmanship instead of an unwillingness to damage his Michaelangelo-sculpted features.

“It’s been five days!”

Zoro’s expression flatlines, “Contrary to popular belief, I do know how to count.”

You bite back a frustrated scream as you push away from your chair and round the table to stand behind him, not giving him enough time to be bewildered before you press a palm to his right shoulder, already focused on finding the tender spots.

“Tell me where it hurts.”

You run an expert palm over the width of his shoulders, focusing on his right, fingers digging into various muscle groups until he winces.

“Ow.”

You grin as you find a tender patch to the right of his spine, almost beneath his shoulder blade.

“You strained your Rhomboid.”

“Gesundheit.”

You roll your eyes and reach over his back for the cup of coffee. You feel his breath hitch as your front presses full against his back.

“Hold still,” you say, pressing the side of the warm cup to the sore muscle.

Zoro makes a choked moaning noise that he tries to bite off, but not soon enough. It sizzles down your spine to curl at the base of your belly, spreading heat through your body in a way you have no urge to examine at this current point in time.

You hold it there for a minute, and then two, till the coffee’s gone lukewarm.

“Here,” you say, tugging the cup away to offer it to him.

He stares at the cup before glancing up at you.

“Caffeine helps with muscle soreness and pain — it’s probably why you’re so addicted to espresso all the time,” you offer by way of an explanation, even as he opens his mouth to ask. He closes his mouth and takes the coffee, downing half of it in a single gulp.

Then, he sets it down on the table before digging a crumpled packet of sugar out of his pants pocket.

“It’s… probably not as sweet as you usually like it but…” he presses it into the palm of your hand, looking anywhere but at your face, “should help the bitterness.”

And then he’s gone, slouching off towards the elevator bank, leaving you gaping after him with the packet of sugar in your hand, your rapidly cooling coffee, and a mountain of revisions you’ve got no hope of finishing tonight.

five.

Wednesday finds you practically sprinting as you reach your Practical Applications course, clutching at your chest as you burst through the gym doors, gasping for breath. Professor Kureha quirks an inquiring eyebrow at you while Mihawk, the fencing instructor, slates you a sharp, rueful glare.

“— as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted,” his bright hawk-yellow eyes flash back over the fencing team, “regionals are quickly approaching and we need you in top form. So — warm-ups stretches, everyone. Pair up and get to it. Zoro, up here with me.”

You duck your head and hurry towards your normal spot along the bleachers, slowing as you notice what looks like a cup of coffee from the Straw Hats Cafe occupying the place where you normally sit. You pick up the cup — it’s still hot to the touch.

On the coffee slip is a single word — Princess.

And though it’s in Sanji’s familiar coffee shop scrawl, only one person has ever called you that.

Heat crests up your chest, prickling at your cheeks. You don’t have to taste it to know that it’s your order — your favorite order. Briefly, you wonder if Sanji made Zoro recite the entire thing before agreeing to put it down, or if he’d spared Zoro the pain of having to say the word ‘decaf’ unironically.

And then you wonder if Nami teased him at all, waiting for his own drink on top of yours.

“Chop chop,” Professor Kureha says, grinning too wide as she wanders over, peering at you over her John Lennon shades, “you heard old Hawk-eyes — time to pair up.”

You hurriedly drop your bag and take a quick sip of our drink, letting out a soft groan of appreciation as the caramel-cinnamon goodness seeps into your blood vessels. Some nameless freshman hopeful from the fencing team is your partner for stretches and you patiently walk him through all the major motions, pushing on his back and laughing kindly when he can’t quite reach his toes.

You feel the faint tingle on the back of your neck that tells you someone’s staring, and you privately think that you don’t need three guesses to figure out who it is. But you don’t give Zoro the satisfaction of looking over till you help the blushing freshman finish all his stretches, giving him an encouraging pat on the shoulder, reaching up on tip-toe to ruffle his hair even though he’s got a solid four inches over you.

When finally, you glance over towards where Mihawk is putting Zoro through his paces, it’s to find him flickering through the motions — flashes of silver, lithe, fluid — and you find your breath held captive in your chest by the sight.

You’ve always known Zoro to be a graceful fencer, but grace has nothing on the way he flows from one move to the next, each muscle drawn like a bow-string, each intake of breath timed and perfect. His arms and legs move in tandem and there’s a bewitching rhythm to the way his body breaks and bends. It is beauty and strength, dance and magic — power and promise and the sword-tip’s whish of premonition.

When he finishes, you suck in a breath you hadn’t been aware you were holding.

You watch as Mihawk murmurs something to Zoro, who winces, looking chastened before Mihawk waves him away and Zoro sets down his epee, making his way over to you.

You open your mouth, about to make some snarky remark but Zoro reaches over his back with one hand and tugs his shirt off in a single, unbroken motion. You gulp, your voice failing you as your eyes settle on the strong ripple of his muscles as he tosses his shirt aside.

Zoro smirks, “Keep starin’ and I’m gonna have to start charging.”

You rip your eyes away, fire licking up the length of your torso as you reach into your bag for a roll of sports tape.

Zoro slumps down in the seat in front of you as you take stock of his sweat-slicked torso, your eyes still catching on the patch of swollen muscle beneath his shoulder blade. You reach forward and run a thumb along it, careful of the way he hisses.

“A hot-patch is only going to do so much,” you say, frowning as you drop the sports tape to focus on massaging the tender bit of skin.

Zoro groans, his eyes falling half shut as you slowly work at the various knots in his shoulders. Your fingers are slow and deliberate, applying just the right amount of pressure. And more than once, Zoro has to bite back what he’s sure would’ve been an indecent moan before it rolls out of his mouth at the way your soft palms press into the planes of his back, the tenseness of his shoulders.

“Keep moaning like that, I’m gonna have to start charging,” you say, much too close to his ear.

Zoro jerks, even as you pull back, laughing. The sound makes his skin prickle up with goosebumps and he doesn’t want to think about the myriad reasons why.

“I bought you coffee, twice,” he grumbles, cheeks pink, his mind still buzzing from the warmth of your palms.

You hum, your fingers flickering over his skin, pulling away for a second before he feels something wonderful and cool pressing against his sore, aching muscles.

“You’re right… you did buy me coffee twice. Even though the first time was horrible vending machine coffee and I used most of it as a heating pad for your injury.”

Zoro grunts, letting you manhandle him as you gently twist his right arm into an array of different stretches to test his range of mobility.

“Still counts.”

You put down his right arm to test his left. Zoro chooses not to think about the way his body tingles where your hands touch him, and especially not where you’re standing too close, your chest occasionally brushing against his shoulder. He chooses actively not to think about the way he can smell the soft, coconut milk fragrance of your lotion as you lean over him, rambling about doing the proper warm-up and cool-down exercises.

He grins as you reach over mid-sentence to finish your drink and you pause, watching him with narrowed eyes.

“What?”

He shrugs, “Nothin’… just that… seems like you liked your drink.”

Your eyes slingshot from his face to the nearly empty cup in your hands.

“I always like my —”

They widen when you realize that Zoro had in fact ordered a double shot of espresso in your usual drink instead of your normal decaf. And, that you’d been too distracted by him to notice.

“I — it — wh —”

Zoro languidly rises from his seat, grinning, “Thanks for the treatment, Princess. I owe you one — lemme buy you a coffee sometime, yeah?”

You stare after him as he makes his way across the room, back to the rest of the team for proper bouts. You force down another blush as you shove the now-empty coffee cup into the nearest trash can, your heart skidding to the rhythmic squeak of feet shuffling against the floors, the bell-like ting of epee blades, the murmur of the watching crowd.

six.

Thursday morning finds you ill-rested and grumpy as you join Robin in the quad, heading for the Straw Hats Cafe during free period.

“Trouble sleeping?” Robin asks, looking you over with mild concern.

You grunt, adjusting your bag, “Had coffee too late in the day.”

At this, Robin frowns, “But you only drink decaf.”

You grunt again, not looking at her, “Yeah, well.”

Robin blinks for a second before a knowing smile splits her lips, “Ah… so. Fencer-boy’s made his move.”

You round on her, fists clenched, “He has not! He just — he just bought me coffee!”

Robin remains infuriatingly unfazed as she stares at you, “Yes. And to most, that would constitute as ‘making a move’. And here I thought you were a fan of romance novels.”

You turn away from her, huffing even as your cheeks fill with color, “I — I am.”

“So?” she asks.

“So?” you echo, cursing yourself for sounding like a petulant child.

“So…” she continues, patient as always, “he bought you coffee.”

You crinkle your nose, your stomach a roiling mess as the pair of you make your way across the quad and duck into the cafe to Sanji’s bright, welcoming voice, your eyes scanning the queue even though you know that Zoro’s got morning practice. This does not go unnoticed by Robin, though she mercifully elects to not question you about it.

“Yes, he bought me coffee. But instead of decaf, he made it a double-shot.” You try very hard to make this sound like a personal affront, but Robin only dips her head.

“Ah,” she says again, and you feel the urge to run out of the building even as the pair of you shuffle towards the front of the line.

“Hi there, oh! I’ve got a special message for you,” Nami says as you get to the registers, her voice silken with glee as she reaches behind the counter to tug out what looks like a receipt. You glance down at the paper, confused, but she only winks as she moves to ask what Robin would like.

You inch to the side, distracted by this strange turn, your eyes dropping to the slip of paper, upon which is scribbled — Good luck on test tomorrow. Evening bout. Gym.

You stare at the cryptic message for a full minute before Robin ushers you toward the counter where Sanji is pumping out drinks, making girls blush as he winks at them each in turn.

“Ah, if it isn’t my favorite Decaf Princess — though… seems like your tastes are a-changin’ these days,” Sanji says, grinning wide as you get to the counter, pushing a steaming cup towards you. You frown at the drink — cinnamon sprinkled atop a perfectly placed dollop of whipped cream, underneath which you’re sure is your favorite drink order. You look back up at Sanji.

“A certain mosshead jock put in an advanced order for you — said to give you an extra shot of espresso for the test you’ve got tomorrow.”

You sputter as Robin laughs beside you, thanking Sanji for her own Long Black.

“You know, you could just be normal and call it an Americano,” you say as the pair of you make your way out of the cafe. Robin grins, sipping at her drink.

“I could… but where’s the fun in that?” she slates you a glance, “More importantly, are you going?”

“To what?” you ask, not meaning to sound so defensive, but you can’t help it, and even as Robin sighs, you know that it’s useless.

“To the bout,” she says, unruffled.

You hunch into your upturned collar and your thick, layered scarf, cradling your drink, the sweet scent of syrup and cinnamon wafting up to tickle your nose. You blush at the thought of Zoro’s voice, full of morning gravel, shy as he lists out all the extremities you like in your coffee order.

“Maybe. I mean… why not, right?”

Robin nods, humming as she takes another long drink, “Mhm — why not indeed.”

You nudge her; she nudges you back. You both laugh as a church bell rings out from across the quad, sending a flock of birds scattering through the misty, morning air.

seven.

Friday evening finds you pushing through the wide gym doors, pressing your hands over the skirt you’d painstakingly picked out, chewing on your bottom lip.

You silently curse at Robin for pulling out last minute, begging off to some Ancient Languages focus group.

“I bet it’s not even real…” you mutter to yourself as you slip into the front row of the bleachers, looking for an empty seat. You somehow manage to look up just as Zoro is about to go on, his mask under one arm, his blade in the other.

You raise your hand in a half wave before catching yourself and shoving it back down, scowling as Zoro’s lips pull into a lopsided grin. You drop into a seat just as Zoro tugs his helmet on and stretches his arms. You tense as you see the slight wince he twitches away as he tests the weight of his blade.

But you needn’t have worried — the bout is quick and decisive, Zoro scoring one point after another, his blade flashing through the air, bright as fish scales. And before you know it, the buzzer sounds, marking his victory. You leap to your feet, cheering with the rest of the crowd as Zoro tugs off his mask and pumps his fists.

You catch his eye and for a moment, the wild rumble of the screaming crowd fades to a dull, thumping baseline. He jerks his head towards the lockers and you nod, swallowing hard as you duck through the still-cheering crowd towards the back of the gym.

When you get there, it’s to find him methodically polishing his blade, his mask set to the side, his thick jacket pulled down to pool around his waist, the rest of his protective wear scattered in heaps on the ground around him. You have half a mind to scold him for being so careless with what you know is expensive gear but you can’t keep yourself from staring at the wide planes of back, curving up to his shoulders, the thick cords of muscle that flex up either side of his neck.

He looks up as you shuffle in, your skirt suddenly feeling a bit too short, too risque for the near-winter weather outside.

You clear your throat and cast your eyes about the empty lockers. You don’t miss the way his gaze skates up your bare legs, pausing at the place where your skirt brushes the top of your thighs.

“Uhm — how’s your shoulder?” your voice sounds too high, echoing strangely along the white-tiled walls.

Zoro licks his lips and puts down his blade, rolling his right shoulder.

“Better but… still not great. Mihawk’s making me to do PT.”

You nod, letting out a soft laugh, “I’m glad. You’d never do it otherwise.”

He scoffs, “You know what that means though, right?” There’s a raw, rolling tension beneath his words, a sort of thickened expectation as he stares at you with dark, meaningful eyes.

You purse your lips, your stomach tightening.

“I —”

Zoro gets to his feet, and you barely register the soft clatter of his blade as it rolls to the side on the bench. He closes the space between you in three quick steps and you find yourself marveling at his speed — wondering vaguely if this is how all his opponents feel when he slips forward, the tip of his blade digging into their shoulder or stomach or the bend of their hip.

“Means we’re stuck with each other. At least till you fix me for regionals in two weeks.”

Your back meets the icy chill of the locker doors and the words are out of your mouth before you can stop them —

“Bold of you to assume that you’re fixable in two weeks.”

Zoro quirks an eyebrow, even as you resist the urge to clap your hands to your mouth, cursing inwardly at whatever the hell made you say that out loud. Your heart thuds an insistent drumbeat inside your chest as Zoro leans casually against the lockers next to you. Like this, you can feel the heat of his skin, the rhythm of his long breaths as he looks you over with sharp, curious eyes.

You think you can taste the sweet, tepid weight of his breath. It smells faintly of coffee and mint and synthetically flavored protein bars.

“Then…” he drawls, propping an arm against the locker door right next to your face, his eyes flickering from your lips up to your eyes and back down again. Your gaze is unabashedly caught on the shape of his mouth, but when you finally force yourself to look up at his eyes, it’s to find them warm and amused.

“How long do you think it’ll take?”

You gulp, “To fix your shoulder?”

Zoro shrugs, “That and… whatever else you think needs to be fixed.”

You purse your lips, an entire kaleidoscope of butterflies erupting in your stomach at his words.

“Who knows? Might take three weeks… might take — forever —” your words cut off as he leans in to graze his lips against yours. And you’re momentarily caught between delight and bewilderment that you’re right — they do taste of coffee and mint and salt — but that they also taste of a dull, throbbing hunger as he leans in to kiss you proper. And then, the blooming realization that you’re just as desperate as he is, pushing in, fingers scrabbling against the skin of his chest as his skim along the sides of your ribs, the dip of your waist.

He kisses you so deep and so long that you’re actually gasping when he finally pulls away to suck a stinging hickey into the smooth of your collarbone, his fingers digging grooves into your thighs as he hoists you up to press you against the cold, hard metal of the lockers.

You let out a clipped moan at the same time he does, and his right arm twitches, though he makes no move to let you go.

Distantly, your mind registers the fact that he’s still technically injured, but the part of you that’s hungry and clawing at the base of your stomach with a fierce, immutable need refuses to listen to reason. It takes more effort than it logically should’ve done to extricate yourself from his grasp, to push him away despite his disgruntled sigh as he stumbles back and stares at you with dark, dangerous eyes.

“What —”

“Fuck —” you hiss, even as you let your head fall back against the lockers, the dull thunk pulling a wolfish grin to his lips.

“Yeah, well —”

“Wait — no —”

Zoro cocks his head, “No?”

You reach forward to tug him back, to kiss him as deeply and desperately as you dare, but you pull away before he can properly sink into the kiss and you pin him with a look.

“We — your shoulder —”

“Fuck my shoulder —”

You shake your head, almost delusional with the heat and want and the insanity of it all, “No! We can’t! We — we’ve gotta take care of it first!”

Zoro rolls his eyes, “It’ll get better if we just leave it alone —”

You shake your head again, laughing as he presses back in, slower this time, grazing his knuckles along the skin of your jaw, tilting you back towards him.

“It won’t,” you say, softly, letting him run a thumb along your lips, “but… if you let me take care of it. It will heal faster…” you trail off, letting the implications simmer beneath the surface of all your unsaid words, and it only takes a second for Zoro to consider before he lowers you to the floor and starts haphazardly gathering up his things.

You drag a hand across your lips, watching him.

“So…” you feel yourself blush as you muster up the words but Zoro scoffs, already impatient as he shoves his stuff into one of the larger lockers and slams the door.

“Mine. It’s closer.”

eight.

His, is — in fact — much closer than you’d thought. Only two blocks from the campus, and in one of the most expensive dorm buildings. You wonder how much he must be paying for it before you realize that he's on a sports scholarship, but you can’t even bring yourself to be bitter as he lets you into his spacious dorm, the giant living room scattered with game consoles and opened cereal boxes, leading to a short hallway that opens into his bedroom.

It’s cleaner than you’d imagined, with a set of light green linens drawn neatly over a full-sized bed, and two sets of pillows.

“Sorry for the mess,” he says, sweeping some energy bar wrappers into the trash from his desk as he tosses down his duffle bag.

You shake your head, looking around, your eyes catching on the thick volumes of fencing books, the endless stacks of sports magazines, the huge set of free weights on a rack in the corner by the closet.

“Uh… do you want a drink?” he asks, suddenly awkward as he scratches at the back of his head.

You turn towards him with a grin, “No. But I do want you to take off your shirt.”

Zoro blinks before he smiles and moves towards the bed, tugging off his shirt and tossing it to the side. You fight the urge to roll your eyes as he leans back on the bed, his perfectly tanned stomach flexing beneath the slanted desk-light as he watches you through lazily hooded eyes.

“On your stomach,” you say, your voice light and surgical as you open your own bag and tug out a tub of medicated massage cream.

Zoro stares for a second before the smile slips off his face to be replaced by a dull, knowing scowl. Still, he doesn’t argue as he flips onto his stomach and sighs, pillowing his cheek on his arms as he pouts at the wall.

“Like I told you — we need to take care of your shoulder first. Regionals are in two weeks. We can’t have you performing like you did tonight.”

Zoro attempts a glare over his shoulder as you carefully maneuver over his back and straddle his hips, warming your palms with the massage cream before setting to work.

“I still won.”

His voice is tight and petulant. You nod, sighing as you work your thumbs into the dip beneath his shoulder blade where you know he’s still sore. He hisses, jerking away from you. You pin him in place with your free arm and continue to roll your thumb across the bundle of muscle.

Two minutes in, you press a bit harder and he lets out a pitched whine that makes you pause in your ministrations.

“F-fuck —” he buries his face in his pillow, thumping a fist against his bed as you laugh and continue the massage, though taking care to be a bit more careful around his injury.

Nearly twenty minutes later, you climb off the bed and wipe your hands. Zoro groans, shifting to watch you with half-lidded eyes and color-stained cheeks.

“I know,” you say, holding up your hands, “that really hurt but you feel much better now, right?”

Zoro grins, sleepy as he blinks slowly up at you, “Yeah. Whatever.”

And then, a long moment later —

“Hey,” he says, his voice soft, flipping onto his side and shifting on the bed as if to make room for you, “stay.”

You freeze, almost unwilling to believe your own ears as you finish putting away your supplies. You glance at him with tight lips and hopeful eyes.

There’s a tiny grin threatening the corners of his lips as he sighs, making a show of yawning and stretching.

“It’s late… and I don’t really feel like walking you back.”

You fold your arms, “I could just call campus security to escort me.”

Zoro stills for a second but a moment later, he casts his eyes up at the ceiling, “Yeah… you could…”

You make no move to leave.

“But you still owe me coffee in the morning,” he says.

You frown, “Wait, what? How’s that?”

He glances at you, “I’ve bought you coffee twice.”

“Yeah, but I just gave you a free 30-minute medical massage treatment for your shoulder.”

“You would’ve had to do it anyway on Wednesday in Practical Applications.”

You narrow your eyes, “Professor Kureha might not have assigned me to you.”

At this, Zoro scoffs, “Yeah right. You’re the best, and so am I.”

“S-she might not have!” you say, though there’s no real conviction in your voice. You both know that he’s right.

“Yeah. Whatever.” He turns away from you, making as if to go to sleep.

You glare at his back, dropping your bag with a loud thump.

“If anything, you owe me coffee now. That massage was worth at least two coffees, if not more.” You plop down on the edge of his bed, scowling at the opposite wall.

Zoro is quiet for a beat too long and you chance a glance at him, only to find him peering you with a strangely indulgent look in his eyes. You blush, tearing your eyes away.

“How’s breakfast?” he asks, his voice once again going soft. Your skin prickles with heat.

“What about breakfast?”

“Coffee and breakfast. That enough to pay for the massage?”

You can’t help the smile that threatens to break across your lips as you glance back at him and catch his eyes.

“I…. guess.”

Zoro chuckles, the sound so low in his throat that it makes you shiver. Quick as anything, he reaches over to pull you down towards him, easily looping an arm around your middle and flipping you both so that you’re pinned beneath him. You barely have time to gasp before you find his lips on yours once more, slow and sweet and shockingly steady.

You kiss him back, letting him push you gently into the crumpled linens of his bed. His fingers are light as he slowly works your skirt down your legs, reaching behind your torso to loosen your bra and tug your shirt from you in a single, smooth motion.

You shiver beneath him and he pulls back to stare. You search his eyes, feeling suddenly uncertain.

“God, you’re gorgeous…”

Heat crests into your cheeks as you try to look away. But he tugs you back with his thumb and steals another kiss.

“It’s late…” he says, pulling away to press your foreheads.

You nod, chewing on your bottom lip. “Yeah, I know…”

“Let’s sleep in tomorrow.”

You laugh, shifting as he curls his body around you, tugging you easily against his chest and pulling the covers over you both. A moment later, the lights click off and you’re both thrown into darkness. You let yourself relax into his arms, wondering just how you’re going to explain this to Robin tomorrow.

“Don’t think too hard about it,” Zoro’s voice murmurs into the nape of your neck.

You grin, nodding as you press further back into him and he grazes a soft kiss along your skin.

“That kinda thinking needs breakfast and coffee first,” you say, to which Zoro chuckles, nodding as he lets you hook your ankles between his, your bodies settling against each other, warm and perfect, the curves and bends meeting like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle finally, finally finding each other at last.

You don’t have long enough to ponder on the light, musk-salt-sweet of his skin or the way you can feel his heartbeat as it threads along your spine or the way that somehow, the shape of him doesn’t feel foreign against the shape of you, before you’re already falling asleep. And to him, he doesn’t have time to ponder the lovely silk of your hair, just as soft as he’d always imagined, or the way your waist feels perfect beneath his hands, or how he’s somehow he’s always known the rhythm of your breaths before he too is falling into the warm embrace of a dark, sweet, restful sleep as well.

nine.

Saturday morning finds you both tangled in each other, the winter sun bright and cold as it slates through the slits of Zoro’s bedroom window. He wakes up first, shifting to stretch until he feels the weight of you beside him. And then suddenly, he's somehow achingly awake and aware of his body against yours, of your paced breaths and his own rapidly increasing heartbeat. For one bewildering moment, he can’t quite remember what brought him here, and then the scenes from the night before — the bout, the lockers, the kiss — the way you’d tasted, how utterly irresistible you’d been, blushing in the dim light of his room, your skillful fingers digging into his tender, swollen flesh — his own rash promise of breakfast and coffee — it all comes rushing back. Zoro lets out a long breath and leans in to brush his lips along your forehead.

You let out a light groan as you shift in his arms, and when you turn, it’s to find him watching you.

“Oh… hey.”

Your voice is quiet, almost shy as you bury your face in the crook of his neck, and he finds himself more endeared than he has words to say.

He clears his throat.

“Morning. Uh… sleep well?”

You laugh, the warmth of your expelled breath ghosting across his clavicle in a way that makes him shiver.

“Mhm… pretty well… and you?”

Zoro clears his throat, “Yeah. Guess it wasn’t… bad.”

He resists the urge to roll away, if only because your cheek is still pillowed on his arm, and he can’t bring himself to pull away from you just yet. So instead, he drops his nose into your hair and takes in the milky scent of your coconut lotion. Tiny, pin-pricks of desire shoot through him, teasing goosebumps into the skin of his back and arms, but he forces himself to lie still as you snuggle against his chest with a contented sigh.

“So… breakfast and coffee?”

Zoro grunts, “Hn. I did promise.”

You smile, letting yourself sink into the thick and syrup of his sleep-deepened voice, his moss-green hair even more tousled than it normally is as he adjusts his head on his pillow.

“Hey,” you say, breathless as you look up at him beneath the sweep of your lashes, your eyes so big and dark and wide Zoro wonders if they might swallow him whole.

“Hey,” he answers, just as breathless, uncertainty creeping up the center of his chest as he stares down at you, lying in the glistening, mercurial light, the bend of your shoulder kissed by the morning sun, the shape of you limned in silver and gold.

You lean up to kiss him before he has the chance to second-guess himself, and though he was the more bold, self-assured one last night, you press in against him this morning, the languid sweep of your tongue along his lips making him groan, helpless, against you. He tastes the satisfied grin at the corner of your mouth as he opens his own, his mind frizzing into gorgeous, white static as you spend what feels like hours exploring the sweet depths of each other's mouths — all tongue and teeth and kiss-swollen lips.

When finally you pull apart, he is more breathless than he’d planned for, his body too warm for his liking, an urgent, pulsing something burning at the base of his stomach as he fights the urge to shove you back and sink his teeth into your skin, to hear you hiss, to make you gasp, to leave the indent of his fingers along the soft flesh of your hips and thighs, to mark you as his in every way he knows how.

But instead, he places a lingering kiss on your cheek and sits up, slowly stretching his arms.

“Careful…” you warn, pushing yourself up as well, watching him, “how’s it feel?”

Zoro tests his right side, drawing his arm up and then to the side, and then pulling it across his torso.

“Whoa… so much better.”

You smile, satisfied.

Zoro chuckles, “Guess I really do owe you breakfast. C’mon.”

He slips out of bed, tugging open a drawer to toss you a thick sweater and a pair of sweatpants. For himself, he only tugs on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, even as you frown, squinting at him from where you’re nearly swimming in his clothes.

“You’ll freeze.”

Zoro smirks as he looks you over, reaching over to pull the hood over your mussed tangle of hair, “Nah, I’m fine.”

You pout, jerking open the drawer to pull out a sweater and tossing it at him.

“You have to keep your right side warm so your muscles don’t just seize up again.”

Zoro stares at the sweater in his hand, looking reluctant before you press your lips into an exaggerated pout.

“C’mon… I worked so hard on getting it better last night… please?”

Zoro groans, rolling his eyes as he tugs on the sweater.

“Yeah, yeah — fine. Let’s go.”

He doesn’t wait for you, nor does he extend his hand. But the pair of you walk elbow to elbow, hip against hip down the bright dorm room hallway, into the chilly Saturday morning air.

“Geez, if you’re gonna yell at me to keep warm —” Zoro reaches over to tug on the drawstrings of your sweater, frowning as he notices how much skin he can still see beneath the opening of the hoodie.

You blush, tugging at it as the pair of you make your way across the empty campus quad.

Halfway across the frost-kissed lawn, he wordlessly reaches out to catch your hand in his, tucking your entwined fingers into the depths of his pocket. You bite back a stupid, dopey grin as you duck your head, quickening your pace to keep up, your footsteps crunching in the dew-bitten grass, the freshly raked gravel.

ten.

There’s already a decent line at the Straw Hats Cafe, but when the pair of you walk in hand in hand, both Sanji and Nami pause for a second longer than usual. Sanji’s eyebrows jerk up his forehead while Nami’s lips curl into a much too satisfied grin as she turns back to the humming espresso machines.

You savor in the smell of freshly ground coffee, absently tracing your thumb over the back of Zoro’s hand.

When you both reach the front, Sanji looks between you expectantly.

“Well, well, well — I’d like to say I’m surprised but —” he shrugs, grinning cheekily, “Well then I’d be lying, wouldn’t I?”

Zoro clicks his tongue but you shoot him a sheepish smile, pursing your lips.

“So… the usual then?” Sanji asks, his fingers poised over the register.

“Yep,” Zoro says, curt as ever, though there’s a distinct blush on his cheeks that not even he can write off as anything else.

You nod as well, “Oh, but… I think I’ll try a non-decaf latte this time. Just one shot of espresso though, please and thank you.”

Sanji blinks at you for a second before letting out a startled laugh and nodding, punching in your order.

“Coming right up, sweet cheeks. Right then, that’d be 8.75 for the latte and 5.50 for the double espresso.”

Zoro reaches into his wallet and pulls out a 20, slipping it across the counter. Down the bar, Nami is humming, looking cheerier than you’ve ever seen her this early in the morning as she goes about making your drinks.

Sanji sighs as he shakes his head, handing Zoro his change.

Zoro narrows his eyes but Sanji cuts him off.

“Take it from me, fam. You don’t wanna know.”

You and Zoro share a puzzled look as you both shuffle down to the pick-up counter, where Nami is sliding your finished drinks toward you with a bright, knowing glint to her eyes. Zoro clears his throat and reaches over for a packet of sugar, nonchalantly tipping it into his drink before picking it up to take a sip.

You try not to gape as you grab your own drink, flashing Nami a quick smile before turning to follow Zoro.

He picks a table as far away from the counter as possible, tucked into a corner, nearly invisible to the rest of the shop. When you sit down, he frowns at your chair for a second before reaching out to tug you across the floor till your chair is next to his. He goes back to his drink without a single word.

It’s all you can do to blush and stare at your steaming cup.

“I thought we were getting coffee and breakfast,” you say after a brief moment of silence.

Zoro grunts, “We are. Coffee first.”

You nod, somewhat mollified as you take another sip of your drink. The warmth trickles down your chest to rest somewhere in the center of your stomach, spreading heat throughout your body in waves.

“We could just get a chocolate croissant,” you say, giving Zoro a sidelong look.

Zoro frowns, tapping his finger against the side of his cup, “Dessert isn’t breakfast.”

You scoff, “Says who?”

Zoro’s expression flatlines, “Says me. And I’m payin’ for it.”

You purse your lips, wondering if you should argue more before deciding against it. A few seconds later, Zoro sighs, casting his eyes about the cafe interior.

“We can have a croissant after real breakfast.”

You giggle into your drink, swallowing down the glee fluttering in your stomach, threatening to spill out of your still kiss-chapped lips.

“Kay, whatever you say.”

Zoro rolls his eyes and folds his arms, but his elbow presses against yours and he doesn’t make to move away.

Across the cafe, Nami leans to watch the pair of you, Sanji at her side, looking both stunned and somewhat pained.

“C’mon man, it’s not even been a week!”

Nami grins, rinsing out a few cups and placing them mouth down to dry before pivoting on her heels and holding out an expectant palm. Sanji sighs as Nami’s eyes glitter with mirth and a hard-won glee.

“Right. I think you owe me fifty bucks.”

Sanji narrows his eyes, glancing back at where you and Zoro are tucked into the corner of the cafe.

“Double or nothing on when they’ll have their first fight. I say… not till next week.”

Nami’s eyebrows twitch up. She looks back at where the pair of you are now bickering over where to have breakfast. A smirk teases at her lips.

She puts down her hand, “Alright then… but like I said — it’s your funeral, Sanji.”

Over in the corner, there’s the dull scrape of chair legs as you push yourself away from the table to fold your arms.

“— Belgian waffles are absolutely an acceptable meal for breakfast!”

Zoro rolls his eyes, though there’s still an amused spark behind his eyes.

“Breakfast without eggs ain’t real breakfast. And doesn’t count if it’s smothered in syrup either.”

You make an indignant noise, frowning even as Zoro tugs you back to press a napkin to your upper lip, where there’s a faint line of whipped cream residue.

Sanji backpedals immediately, “Uh — right so, I feel like we need to define what really constitutes a ‘fight’, yeah?”

Nami tuts, shaking her head, “Nope! A bet’s a bet. Now pay up.”

feedback always welcome :) reqs are closed.

---

The tension!!!!

Addicting Taste Chapter 7

Synopsis: Enishi Yukishiro was on a mission to execute his piece de la resistance. A plan to avenge his beloved sister. Until you showed up. Will you be a part of his downfall or will you try to save him?

Pairing: Enishi Yukishiro x reader

Genre: strangers to lovers, sunshine and sunshine protector, comedic relief, angst, slow burn, some fluff

Word count: 11.4k+

A/N: This chapter is probably the bane of my existence. All I'm going to say is that it's one of my favorites and I am so proud of it. I hope Enishi figures his feelings out sooner or later. Hope you like it. Enjoy lovelies, Paula.

Now Playing: run for the hills by Tate McRae

Previous

Anger, fear and pain.

That was all you could feel as you laid on the floor in front of your bed. They had a boxing match in your head, throwing different thoughts into the middle of the ring to see which one had the most impact and could come up on top to win.

The anger argued that you had every right to go back in the basement and rip the man's head off. To pull out his guts with your bare hands as he would watch in horror. But that was Barairo talking. That wasn't you. She yelled at you to let her out the minute you laid your hands on his collar to show him just as psychopathic you could get. You tried to keep her away as much as you could but the second your eyes laid on your mom's necklace around his neck you wanted to throw the door to her prison cell open wide and let her devour everything in her sight.

And you almost did. If it wasn't for Enishi's hand latching around your hand to ground you and bring back to earth. Your eyes found his, pleading for destruction only to get refused by a wary shake of his head. You suddenly felt self-conscious as you registered that all the eyes in the room were directed at you with a mix of confusion and pity, the feeling you hated the most in the world because that was the only thing present in people's eyes every time they looked at you. Whether it was begging for food on the street or fighting in the rings, it was always there, reminding you that you had no safe place to call yours in the world anymore. That everything you knew was gone and you only had yourself to blame.

The fear insisted that it was all because you couldn't do more to prevent any of this happening. Your parents disappearing. The massacre written in the walls of the place you called home. Not being able to finish the job when you had the chance at your feet. All because you were scared and weak. You couldn't fight for them just like you couldn't fight for yourself back there on the hill when Enishi had to step in and save you. Or back at the casino where you almost got injured fatally because you couldn't pay attention to the world around you.

You tried to put on your bravest front when you trained with him, masking all of that fear even when you felt insecure about your lack of skills. You tried your hardest in training, but whenever you went one step forwards, you would fall four steps behind when it came to the real thing. It was the fear that made you run away, trying to hide yourself away in hopes no one could find you. Even if it meant hiding yourself in the depths of your soul.

In the end, the pain was the only one that could win the fight. It was the only thing you felt as you laid on the cold wooden floors staring at the ceiling day and night, clasping your mother's necklace close to your chest. Time stopped for you in that basement. The hands on the clock ceased their ticking as you drowned the sound out with your cries or your fits of rage directed at things in the room. that would end up all over the floor. The jungle of thoughts in your head was making you lose yourself and the only thing keeping you from spiralling was the hope that you would hear something about your mom.

I need you, mom. I don't know what to do without you. Please come back to me. Please tell me what to do to find you.

You couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, couldn't train. You couldn't function at all. These thoughts seemed to be the only ones keeping you sane enough in the confines of your room.

The only times you did leave your room was to knock on Enishi's office door to ask if he had any new information about your mother, be it any small speck of a lead on her whereabouts, her state or if your father was alive too. But the answer was the same each time.

He won't talk.

Enishi hated the way you looked more broken each time you came by. He tried to get you out of your room. He would bring you food and leave it outside of your door at lunch only to find it still there by dinner. He tried to get you to train but you refused to even hear it. The light in your eyes dimmed the more you stayed locked in your room and he was running out of ideas to get the you he knew back.

He tried to make that son of a bitch talk but he just wouldn't budge, no matter what torture techniques he tried with him. He wanted to have something to give you whenever you came around to keep you with him longer but every time he tried changing the subject you would run away back to your room.

-----------

After two days of moping around in your room you finally decided to start training again. You needed to get better if you wanted to find your parents any time soon and strengthening your skills was the starting point.

Enishi saw your determination as you pulled him out of his office to train with you at random hours of the day or night. But he also saw that you were pushing yourself way too much. You wanted to get better but he wouldn't sit there and watch you hurt yourself like that willingly. So, whenever he refused training with you it was for the sake that you would take a break yourself. But you kept going. Whether it was raining or it was too cold to be outside you were there practicing with the sword until you got it right.

Last night it was raining heavily, the garden grounds turning to sloshy mud. But the storm inside of your heart was louder and more menacing than any rain mother nature could bring. Your clothes were soaked and stuck to you uncomfortably, hair wet like you just took a bath. With a solid grip on your sword you practiced thrusting until that one attack came out perfectly. You did it over and over, until the mud around you made it harder to continue.

-------

Waking up this morning was pure agony. You got a few hours of sleep from exhausting yourself enough to feel like you could fall asleep peacefully. It felt like the room was caving in on you and all you wanted to do was beg whatever force put you on this earth to take you back and leave you there if it meant that the throbbing in your body could stop, even for a little while. But you had to get up and go back to training because Enishi finally agreed to train with you again. It took a lot of convincing to get back to it together so you couldn't kick it away just because you didn't feel 100%.

The duvet around you was doing little to keep the warmth in as the room felt way too cold for your liking. You got out of bed with a groan, all of your muscles aching as you trudged to the bathroom with slow steps. Stopping in front of the mirror you took a look at yourself. If this was a zombie movie you would have gotten the lead role. The dark circles around your eyes looked like a raccoon's, a dark contrast to the paleness of your face. It scared you to look at yourself and the hollowness that consumed the light in your eyes.

You shook your head and turned on the tap, slapping some cold water on your face to make yourself look more alive. Your cheeks were weirdly warm under your cold palms but you brushed it off to be due to the sudden temperature change in the weather. With a bit of a struggle you managed to change out of your clothes and stepped outside of your messy room, making a mental note to clean it up after training.

You thought of stopping by the kitchen to put something in your system but you decided against it as you didn't really have an appetite. You drank some water but the liquid seemed to do more damage than aid your dry throat. Placing down the half drank glass of water in the sink you headed towards the garden. Opening the doors, you felt your lungs struggling to breathe in the chilly air.

Enishi was already there swinging around his sword to warm up. Sensing your presence behind him he turned around to you and scanned you quickly. He hasn't seen you in days and he could tell that something felt off about you today. Your shoulders were slumped over like you were in pain. Your eyes looked sunken in, worse than they were the last time he saw you. Not to mention that your normally rosy cheeks looked awfully pale for you to be anywhere near okay. Even your steps seemed slower. They weren't like your usual anxiety soaked steps whenever you came to train, but they were different. He wanted to ask you if you were doing okay but you beat him to it and changed the subject.

“Let’s-“ you started talking but your scratchy voice stopped you. Clearing your throat you tried that again trying to sound more convincing so you wouldn't raise any suspicions about your state.

“Let’s get this over with,” you said as you put on a fake smile. He took one more look at you and shook his head, moving to his place. He thought you would tell him if something was wrong but seeing as you were so hellbent on training he didn't prod any further.

He knew you practiced one move the most these days. A slash across the diagonal, good in any close combat. He wanted to see how you would use it against an opponent so you started sparring. He came at you slow at first to ease you back into training with another person. But the more you sparred he saw you were back to dodging his moves instead of attacking him. It confused him that you kept stepping back every time he came closer.

“You’re supposed to attack,” he said as a matter of fact.

“I know. I’m just trying to figure out a scheme of attack,” you lied.

You could barely keep yourself upright, legs feeling like lead every time you took a step. Dodging his hits took less energy than attacking him, but it still made you sweat more than you normally do during training. A fever was taking a hold of you and that was bad news. You didn’t know how much longer you could hide your predicament before he would take notice and bench you for an undetermined period and you didn't want that. But the sparring got to a point where it was way too intense, the cold air around you changing to an unbearable heatwave. Enishi continued to charge at you and you barely caught most of his hits. You felt like you were going to pass out if you didn't take a break.

One misplaced balance of your sword and Enishi was quick to notice something was wrong from the way you faltered when he swung from a closer distance. You took longer to lift the blade and tired out too easily when blocking his own. So he stepped back from you and put down his sword. You stopped and looked at him confused, hoping your body didn't give away too much about how shitty you were feeling. Straightening your back to look more stable than you felt inside at the moment, you tried to get your rapid breaths under control.

“Why are we stopping?” you panted.

Getting air in was a pain as less and less usable air travelled inside of your chest.

“You don’t feel well do you?” he asked, fixing you with his eyes in case you decided to lie to his face.

“I’m fine,” you said through gritted teeth. “I just want to get this move perfectly.”

He tilted his head at you looking for any signs you were lying and was surprised that he couldn't find any because it did seem like you were. He got pretty good at reading you in the month you already spent together and knew when to call it quits in annoying you or when you were overthinking. But right now it was hard to figure out what was going on in that head of yours. Your body looked ready to give out but your eyes were piercing through him telling him you were just too focused. He seemed to buy your doughnuts for now but he still looked a little worried.

“Are you sure you don’t want to take a break?”

“I’m sure.”

You looked too determined and he failed to see through that.

You resumed training, more forceful attacks coming your way. Enishi got too lost in thought to see that he was delivering blows a little too hard, like always. It was one of the things you liked about him the most: how focused he was on training. He would get really engrossed in it even if was just practice and usually you would be able to sense his attacks. But right now your senses were in overload.

You tried to hit back but the most you mustered was a slash that almost accidentally cut into his arm if it wasn't for his quick thinking to duck out of the way. He moved around you looking for your uncovered areas and you tried your hardest to spot him, breaths coming out heavier as you whirled around. Your swords clashed again and you almost had him when all of a sudden he went for a side cut from your left with his sword. You barely defended the hit by pushing your blade to catch his, the quickness of the move sending your vision spinning.

The exhaustion, the heat and the sweat clinging to your body overwhelmed you. You tried to push his sword once more before you leaned your weight on your sword for support, dark spots appearing in your clouded vision. You didn't even notice you were careening to the right until your blade screeched as it slid down the length of his all the way down to the hilt. Before you could hit the ground you heard the blades clang to the floor as strong arms secured around you to keep you upright. Your ears felt like they were stuffed with cotton unable to register that Enishi was frantically calling your name. A cold hand touching your cheek offered some relief from the warmth boiling your body. Your head fell on his shoulder and you looked up at him, eyes focusing enough to see the worry on his face. You could see his lips moving but none of the words made any sense until they finally made their way to your ears.

“I knew something was off,” he said looking down at you with a glint of guilt in his eyes.

“I’m fine,” you grunted regretting even speaking as it turned the mild headache you had into a drilling migraine. Your hand moved to hold your head as the pain only got worse.

"You're anything but fine right now."

The tone in his voice told you he was angry with you, probably for lying to his face that you were fine when you definitely weren't. And for continuing to train when he always told you that training without being in the mindset or the health for it was bad for you. But you refused to listen and look where that got you now.

"You're so fucking stubborn."

In a swift move, Enishi hooked one arm under your legs and secured the other around your back lifting you up to carry you back inside. He figured that staying outside in the cold would do you more worse than good. You wanted to protest but you didn't want to argue with him about your idiotic life choices right now, so you snuggled your head closer to the crook of his neck. that provided you some warmth as your body was now racked by chills. You felt like dozing off from the comfort of your temporary pillow until you felt the vibrations of his voice against your temple.

“Hey, stay awake. We’ve got to get your fever down a little before you sleep.”

You tried your hardest to keep your eyes open but the way he carried you lulled you to sleep and made you a little nauseous at the same time.

“Miyu, open your eyes,” he said sternly, picking up his pace.

“It makes me dizzy,” you croaked out annoyed at him.

“Then keep talking to me. Say anything, just don’t shut down just yet,” he asked you, concern too present in his voice for you not to notice it.

Why was he so worried? It wasn't like you would drop dead if you closed your eyes for a minute.

You tried to think of what to say that would be more than just rambling random words and you came empty-handed. That was until you looked up at him and you saw those crystal balls glistening in the dark hallway. His eyes.

“I like your eyes,” you said and he seemed to get a little taken aback by your confession as his steps slowed down.

Truthfully, it was something you didn’t want to tell him just yet. It was like your own little secret. You weren't one to fancy prolonged eye-contact with anyone or look people in the eye when they spoke. But you found yourself looking for his almost all the time. You admired the way they twinkled with every emotion he was feeling. Most of the time they blazed with anger at the world, consuming everything in their wake. But there were a few times where they twinkled with joy, whenever he talked about his sister or when he was spending time with you. There was something oddly comforting about them and they always put you at ease. Swallowing your pride for once you admitted to this secret out loud.

“What do you like about my eyes?” he asked, uncertainty behind his question.

If only you knew. I could write books and it still wouldn't be enough to describe what they make me feel.

“They’re dark and so full of pain. But they hold so much warmth in them. You don’t want to admit it but you’re not just a big bad mafia boss killing people for a living. You’re more than that, to me at least,” you said the last part in a mumble hoping he wouldn't hear it but he did, tensing slightly and halting his steps.

He looked down at your shivering form tucked safely in his arms. He had so much to say to you but he settled for a quick kiss on your burning forehead for the time being. It was the smallest peck, so soft you could have missed it if you didn't have your eyes open. It was his way of acknowledging the things you said and that you will talk more about it when it was time. But for now taking care of you was a priority.

In your dazed state you noticed he went past your room and he saw the confusion on your face.

"You're staying in my room for a while so I can make sure you're going to get better," he said as he pushed the doors to his room open, the warmth of his room surrounding your body. You whined in protest when he headed for the bathroom knowing exactly what he was thinking. You felt anything but ready for a shower right now.

He stepped inside and placed you on the floor an arm still around you in case you slid down to the floor. He turned on the water and let it get warm as he turned his attention back to you. You were gripping his tank top in a frenzy trying to hold yourself up against the bouts of nausea. He kept a hand around you to let you know he wasn't going anywhere and that you were safe in case anything happened.

"I know you don't want to take one right now," he said as he moved some hair away from your face. "But if you sleep this sweaty, you're just going to get worse."

You shook your head in his chest childishly but you knew there was no way to get out of it now. He wouldn't leave it alone until he saw you healthy enough to annoy again and you just had to accept his perusing.

"Just hold onto me and I'll do the rest, okay?"

Giving in to his pleas as he rubbed your back comfortingly, you nodded weakly. You hated how easily he got under your skin and knew everything that made you click in such a short time. Back rubbing was one of the things you loved and he always did it when he needed you to accept something that was for your own good.

He helped you undress discarding your sweat clad clothes to the floor. Once he took his own off too he helped you step into the shower. The warm water hit your body and the comfort made your knees weak. You remembered you haven't had a shower since your last one that was with him too, after your bathtub adventure before the mission. He still didn't replace the broken water tap and you had a feeling it was because he wanted you to shower in his room willingly without him whisking you away for other adventures. It was sneaky but you gave him credit for it being a smooth move to get closer to you.

He stepped in with you and checked to see if you were okay or ready to drop still.

"Let me know if it gets too much and I'll get you to bed, okay?"

You nodded and wrapped your arms around his torso with the little energy you had left. Your head laid flat to his chest where you could hear his heartbeat that seemed to be accelerating beyond a normal speed. He must have been panicking a little and you felt bad for putting him through all this trouble. You wanted to push him away and tell him to let you deal with the mess you caused yourself. He didn't need to take care of you like this, especially after you shut him out. You didn't think of his feelings at all and it made you feel even more guilty than you already did for everything else going wrong in your life.

But there he was, holding you close to him so gentle like you were made out of glass. He washed your hair, massaging your scalp softly to get rid of all the dirt that gathered there from your days spent training outside. It felt like he got rid of some of the dirt in your soul too. As cold as he was, he was the also the warmth you needed. You knew he cared even if he didn't show it a lot.

He tried to hurry, moving to wash the rest of your body as you looked ready to lay down on the floor of the shower cabin and just sleep there like it was a premium bed. He kept asking you things to keep you awake and talking even if all he received from you was a blabbering mess of mumbles.

Once you were cleaner than you have been before in your life, he turned off the water and wrapped you in a bathrobe. Leading you to the counter near the sink, he placed you on top of it while he dashed to his room to bring you some clothes. The warmth of the shower water was replaced by the cold marble surface that made your shivers return even worse than before, coming with a new wave of nausea. He started dressing you and you put your head on his shoulder, managing to only pull a blouse on you before he noticed the way you gripped his own that he threw on harshly before he came to you.

"What's wrong?"

You had your eyes shut tight trying to swallow whatever tried crawling up your sore throat.

"Miyu, look at me."

"I feel like I'm going to throw up-" you didn't even get to finish as the bile rose in your throat. You hopped off the counter and leaned over the toilet bowl emptying whatever your stomach gathered up. Enishi knelt down beside you a hand grabbing the hair out of your face while the other rubbed your back.

"What are you even throwing up? You haven't eaten anything in the past few days."

"My hopes and dreams."

He would have laughed at that if it wasn't for your head hanging above the toilet bowl. It amazed him how you still tried to ease the seriousness of the situation in your state.

When you were done you wiped your mouth on a spare towel and threw it in the corner, falling back into his chest. The shivers intensified as your whole body was now consumed by cold from all sides, the only source of warmth being the man beside you. He pulled you up from the floor, careful not to make you more woozy and took you to bed.

He placed you down on the mattress and tried to dry a bit of your hair and then let you lay down. You grabbed one of the blankets he put on the bed, wrapping your body like a burrito, while he covered you with the duvet. He had more blankets prepared in case you needed them and you made a mental note to thank him for the extra thought. The extra thoughts coming from him lately warmed you up inside because they were like little notes telling you he was there and ready to help with anything and you couldn't tell where all this care was coming from in the first place.

He got in bed next to you sitting against the headboard and you cuddled into his side, seeking his warmth. Your body couldn't produce enough heat even after the hottest shower you ever took and the fact that you were wrapped tightly in bundles. He shifted closer to you and carded a hand through your hair, which soothed your migraine.

"Do you need me to get you anything?"

You shook your head and grabbed onto his other hand pulling it on top of your stomach. He laced his fingers with yours. All you wanted was to have him next to you right now.

"I just need you here."

The last few days were hell to bear alone and it took ruining your health to notice that accepting help wasn't all that bad. Enishi was ready to help you no matter what you needed and you didn't know how to thank him. The way he cared for you was something akin to the care your parents gave you. As scary as it was to let yourself feel it you couldn't help but welcome it. Maybe a part of your chills didn't come from the cold but from the way he was acting towards you.

Emotions swirled around your head and everything suddenly felt too overwhelming. The muscles aching, the migraine, the pain that was numb for now but promised to return soon. You tried to hold the tears at bay but you couldn't. So you let them out unable to keep things bottled in anymore.

"Hey, what's wrong?" he asked as he cupped your face.

You tried to say something but all that came out was air through choked sobs.

"Miyu, what hurts? Talk to me."

"Everything," you cried out as you hid your face in his side.

You wanted to tell him every thing that hurt from the biggest to the smallest thing but you couldn't do more than tighten your grip around him. He moved to hug you, pulling you on top of his chest.

"I'm here. I've got you now," he whispered as he rubbed your back. "You're going to be okay."

--------

His heart stopped when he saw your eyes roll to the back of your head back there. He tried to keep the worry away but he couldn't help panicking a little when the familiarity of the scene hit him way too hard. A fraction of a vivid memory took him back to the day he lost his sister, a day he couldn't forget no matter how hard he tried.

The snow blanket that was forming around the woods made him smile. It wasn't long until he got back to the house and he could play in the snow with Tomoe. The recent times he went over to her place ended up in arguments and unwanted words thrown at each other all because he didn't want to accept that man for her. He was walking trouble in his eyes and Tomoe could yell at him all she wanted but it wouldn't change the disdain he felt for him. He hoped they could make up this time around and just forget about everything else.

Last time it snowed this much they made the biggest snowman. They placed him in front of the house and called him the guardian, decorating his face in an angry manner. His mouth was an intimidating sneer made from a few stones that matched the small twig eyebrows above his eyes. Tomoe forgot to pick up carrots but she used a sweet potato for his nose. It looked absolutely horrendous but it was their source of entertainment until the cold winter passed and the snowman melted with the coming of spring.

He went into town and picked up more sweet potatoes so she could boil some too. He almost made it to the house but stopped once he heard grunts nearby, followed by his sister's voice so he followed the sound, pushing away frozen tree branches until he reached the scene. His heart stopped at the sight.

Tomoe was holding tightly onto a man to protect him from the man he called trouble. The one she fell for, pushing her only family in the process. He slashed his sword across her back without a glint of regret in his eyes, crimson blood staining the white snow as she fell to the floor. He had the audacity to cradle her close to his body as he watched the light drain from her eyes.

He wanted to run to her and be the one holding her instead. He deserved to be the last one she saw before her eyes were consumed by darkness. But the fear kept him glued to the tree a few feet away, unable to move or do anything else but cry and blame himself that he couldn't do more.

He hoped he would never experience that feeling again but here he was, cradling you to his body like the world tried its hardest to take you away. Your cold scared him not because you looked the worst he'd ever seen you but because of how much pain you went through to get you in this state. He wasn't a fool. He knew this was the result of you closing yourself away from him and everyone else to process everything. You were living his worst nightmares all on your own and it made him want to burn the world. He knew he couldn't take your pain away and feel it for you even if he wished to.

He wanted you to talk to him. Tell him everything that hurt and ask him to fix it for you. Tell him that you needed him to hold the sky off your shoulders for a minute and he would hold it for as long as he could. But he couldn't push you. He knew better that help was best when it was accepted rather than forced. He just hoped you would ask for it and lean on him like you let him lean on you that rainy night in the garden. If you didn't find him in time he might have lost it completely and there would be no coming back from that.

He checked your temperature hourly, hand laid across your forehead hopeful that you would get better. Whenever it went up you would toss and turn around in your sleep, waking up abruptly to search for him in the dark. He tried to reassure you that everything was okay and that you had nothing to worry about as he went back to being your human pillow. Every time it happened you found his hand and held it close to your chest in a death grip until your hold would loosen telling him you fell back asleep.

The day turned into night and he didn't move an inch from his spot beside you. He just wanted to watch over you and keep you safe and warm, occasionally dozing off with you in his arms.

-------

You woke up to the smell of food. Sighing contently you opened your eyes and sat up slowly just as Enishi entered the room, a bowl and a mug of tea balanced carefully in his hold. He smiled seeing you awake.

"How did you sleep?" he asked as he placed everything on the nightstand to sit next to you.

"A little better. Is that for me?"

"Yes. It's porridge and some tea."

Porridge was the bane of your existence. As much as you knew it was what your body needed to get better you hated it with a burning passion. Your mother made it whenever you got sick and you always tried to convince the maids into eating it for you on the promise that you will stop being a trouble for them for at most a month. But they would always rat you out to your parents and you would get scolded for it.

"I want real food," you mumbled disappointedly. You puffed your cheeks and made puppy eyes at him to let you off this time but by the stern look on his face he wasn't buying your doughnuts anymore.

"You're getting real food when we're sure you can keep it down. For now it's this," he placed the bowl in your hands and waited for you to try it.

You took a spoonful and put it in your mouth only to grimace at the taste. This was anything but porridge.

"What the hell is this?"

"Hey, now. I know I'm not the greatest cook but you have to eat that whole bowl if you want real food."

He knew he botched the recipe but as bad as it tasted you needed the nutrients. You didn't eat anything in days and giving you a whole meal wasn't a good choice. He really didn't want to watch a rerun of your hopes and dreams spilling out through your guts again.

You sighed and ate a few more spoons until your stomach said it was enough and you handed him the bowl. He gave you the tea and you took a sip smiling at the taste as it was your favorite. At least he knew how to sweeten you. You placed it back on the nightstand and leaned back in bed.

"I have some stuff to work on in my office. If you need anything please call me. As big or small as it may seem."

He was coddling way you too much and it wasn't in his nature. You felt bad for keeping him away from his work. But he reassured you time and time again that it was okay to lean on him. Even if what went through your head wasn't a big deal. It came from a place of understanding and as much as he tried to hide it you could tell he went through the same thing.

You tried sleeping but every position you changed to seemed more uncomfortable than the previous. Each time you did fall asleep the thoughts that left you in pain for days on end would creep back into your mind and you would wake up looking for him. Deciding that enough was enough you decided to pay him a visit. Wrapping one of his chunkier kimonos around you, you stepped out of the comfort of the bed and went to his office. He sighed when he saw you come in like a lost puppy looking for its owner.

"You're supposed to be in bed."

"I was getting bored in there," you said as you walked to his couch and plopped yourself on it getting comfortable.

"Well, you're not going to find much fun here either."

You didn't really need any entertainment. You just didn't want to be alone and if you just sat there with him whilst he worked it was enough for you.

After a while, you dozed off on the couch to the sound of him scribbling away on paper. He heard your light snores and looked up from his maps to see you fast asleep, head nuzzled into the plush of the couch backrest with your knees pulled up to your chest. He smiled and shook his head at you walking to to your spot, He only now noticed that you were wrapped tightly in his kimono. It was a dark blue one he really liked because it was comfortable to wear. He thought you suited warmer colours until now when he saw you in blue. The material was big enough to be a blanket on your small form, falling over you so effortlessly. As if his aura rubbed off on you in a way that welcomed it rather than pushing it away like the other people he tried getting close to before. He knelt beside the couch and pulled it up to cover your exposed shoulder.

"You're so stubborn," he whispered.

He slid his arms behind your back and your legs and lifted you up to take you back to the warmth of his bed.

--------

The days passed by in a blur. You spent most of the time sleeping or annoying Enishi because he wouldn't let you do anything else. He benched you from cooking or training and it drove you insane.

It took about a week until he let you train again in a way that wasn't straining for you. Little by little you got your strength back and it showed in your sparring sessions. You could handle yourself better and it was all thanks to him and his incessant nagging telling you to rest and take it easy. As annoying as it was you had to accept his way of nursing you back to health.

You had a lot of time to think about everything, thoughts ranging from finding your mother to figuring out Enishi. His presence affected you in a multitude of ways lately. You contemplated his actions, his touches, his words. Every gesture he made towards you that you couldn't understand the reason of. It went beyond the sex drive you felt mutually and the thoughtless words said in the act.

It all started the night of the casino mission. You tried shaking off his words, convincing yourself it was just the lust talking for him and that it was the same in your case. But when you told him 'I need you' you said it with your whole being. And it seemed to change everything.

You started questioning if he felt the same things you did. If the hands carding through your hair or the late night conversations in the dark meant anything to him, because they meant everything to you. If they did, he was making a great job at hiding that because you spent the whole week analysing every single thing that happened to the both of you until you wanted to literally take a bite out of the wall.

As blind to the obvious as you were sometimes, you thought you could pinpoint where his feelings stood, but you often got side-tracked by the butterflies forming in your stomach while you watched him cook for you or tell you new facts about the swords you were training with. He did everything to turn you away from thinking too much and it felt like an avoidance tactic. You needed to talk about a lot of things sooner or later and you hoped it would be the first.

The next mission was nearing up and you shoved all of these thoughts under the rug for the time being. You needed to focus because it involved your mother. The man in the basement finally chirped after going days without basic necessities like food and sunlight. He gave Enishi a lead on your mother's whereabouts, restoring a little hope in your broken soul.

She was apparently working as a maid for a mafia he had ties with. They were throwing a ball to celebrate the birthday of their leader and she was going to be there. You took the information with a grain of salt because it seemed like it was too good to be true. You thought of the possibility that he just tried to lead you further away from finding her. But Enishi made everyone dig around and they found that the ball was truthfully being held tonight.

Enishi told you to stay put, insisting that it was only him who would go with the rest of the gang. You tried to convince him to let you come but he refused to hear it. So, like any kid getting told not to do something, you went and did the exact opposite, just getting dressed to kill.

You finished strapping your pistols to your thighs under the dress and looked in the mirror, smiling softly at the person starring back at you. She was so different from the person who came here a little over a month ago. She was so scared of herself, unable to let go of her past. But now she looked so confident in her own skin and so much more powerful. She was so much healthier too and back to herself that it made you proud. You blew a kiss to yourself in the mirror and winked at how pretty you looked. Confidence looked hella good on you.

Enishi told you about the mission a few days ago and you thought of every possible way to not let him leave in that carriage without you. It took a little prodding and the promise of a month full of desserts for the whole gang but you managed to coax Wu into keeping Enishi here as long as you needed to get ready.

Enishi was pacing around, mid-argument with his second in command as to why he wasn't moving the carriages. Wu just shook his head and kept his mouth sealed shut as part of your deal. Enishi stopped yelling once he heard the click of an all too familiar pair of heels and cursed himself for being so blind. He should have seen it coming from the way you gave in so easily and stopped trying to convince him to let you come.

Turning around to scold you his breath got stuck in his throat. You looked breathtaking. Your hair was down to the side, locks falling in wavy curls over your shoulders. You were wearing the red qipao dress he bought for you at the market even if you hated his guts for buying it for you. But the dress seemed to have some major adjustments that altered it a lot from the original.

The constricting part at the top was turned into an off-the-shoulder neckline and the small slit on the side run up higher almost to your hip. The bottom was full of flares from the same material in a darker burgundy. The sleeves were now made into gloves that ran all the way up to your elbows, fabric at the end looking like scraps from the corset you wore the night of the casino mission. Your mother's necklace sat around your neck, red stone bringing out your eyes.

"Close your mouth, dearest. A fly might fly in."

You were satisfied by his reaction that if fuelled your confidence beyond the normal levels.

"Is that what I think it is? Miyu?"

You followed his eyes and noticed he was staring at the very familiar golden material running around the bottom that you used to amplify the dragon embellished on the slit by adding a few pieces of material to the red flares.

"You said I could borrow anything from your closet," you scoffed.

"I said borrow, not cut up to pieces."

"Oh, come on. It looks less like a wedding dress now, doesn't it?"

You batted your eyelashes at him and he huffed an annoyed sigh. Letting Wu help you into the carriage you got comfortable and smiled back at him. You knew you were in deep shit for countless reasons, but the biggest being that you cut up the really expensive golden kimono in his wardrobe. It was gathering dust in there anyways. At least you put it to good use.

"Shall we go?"

As angry as he was at you he was glad to see that mischief smile back on your face. He was going to let you off. For now.

"You will be the death of me one day, Miyu Hikari," he grunted before he sauntered in the carriage next to you.

He let his eyes linger on you for a few more moments. He couldn't help but admire the alterations to the dress and how skillfully they were done. It was clear as daylight you were a Hikari. You had craftsmanship running in your blood as much as you didn't want to admit it.

"When did you even modify the dress?"

"I think you forgot that you had me on house arrest for like a week," you said playing with one of the ruffles on your dress.

"It wasn't house arrest."

"It was."

"It wasn't."

"Twas," you sung.

"Twasn't," he followed suit.

The both of you erupted into a fit of giggles. It was your turn to let your eyes wander over his outfit, unable to get enough of it from just one look.

"You know, you don't look too bad yourself."

"I let Wu style me. Don't know if that was a mistake or not considering he wears furs like he's the madame of the house."

"He did a good job."

Wu had an eye for fashion and you had to give him that because when you stepped out of the mansion you thought you were hallucinating. You only saw a broad back clad in what looked like a western suit. You recalled him saying he would never be caught dead in something like that. Thank god you didn't miss the show.

The wind was knocked out of you when he turned around and you got a full view of the outfit. He wore a full tailored black suit. The vest sat on top of a white shirt, hugging his body like it was made on order. It was the sluttiest thing a man could wear. A silver chain ran from the vest to the blazer, matching the silver earring in his ear. Thoughts that weren't exactly pristine passed through your mind and it took a huge amount of rationality to not act them out.

The thing that shocked you the most was that he wore a fucking tie. You knew he hated that tie by the way he fidgeted with it to loosen it around his neck. He most likely contemplated arson from the way he looked at Wu. But he definitely looked the mafia boss part now and it made your knees weak.

"Why didn't you stay back like I told you?"

"I think it's fair to say you already know I don't listen to orders. And this is about my mom," you fidgeted with the piece of fabric in your hand. "I've spent so many years searching for any trace of them and I can't just sit back when we might know where at least one of my parents is."

He put his hand over yours and pulled it to his leg, rubbing comforting circles on your knuckles to ease your nervousness. He was doing it again. Getting you out of your mind to focus back to the present.

"I know. I just didn't want you to come in case it was a false lead."

"Even if it is we will check it out together."

The carriage came to a halt. You heard excited chatter and music which meant you arrived at the venue for the ball.

"You ready?"

"Always."

-----------

The place was nothing like you've ever seen before. You've seen mansions that looked like castles before, when you used to work the paid assassin gig for the rich and powerful, but none of them came close to this one. The sculpted fountains outside should have been enough of a giveaway that this place was scalded in gold and money that was murdered and stolen for. No human being should be able to have this much wealth especially when it wasn't theirs to keep.

The event was on an invitation basis and you were surprised to see Enishi pull out one with your names on it handing it to the men standing guard at the doors. Once they gave you the okay they opened the doors to let you in and closed them back up. You walked in and realised you were on the first floor of the building. Walking further away from the horde of people around the entrance, you scouted the place. The architecture was really European, column walls lined on every side supporting the building. The artwork on the walls was the same, the running theme of naked people painted angelically to depict romance sneering at you, as if to say you didn't deserve romance too.

You sighed leaning over the stone railing as you scouted out the place. You had a perfect view of the ballroom and all the guests that pooled downstairs. Most of them were couples of all ages, dressed elegantly in such a way that flaunted their wealth. The men smoked expensive cigars while their women had their necks decorated in rubies of all shapes and colours. You couldn't lie that you felt a little out of place.

The minute you walked in with Enishi on your arm chatter ceased and all eyes were on you, well mostly the female ones seeking something to gossip about. They started picking apart your hairstyle, your dress, your face. The fact that the man at your side chose you as a plus one instead of one of them. They called him 'too handsome to be real' while fanning their faces and you would have agreed if it wasn't for the intense urge to poke your tongue out at them. But you had to behave like a lady, so you settled for throwing daggers with your eyes their way.

You didn't know why you suddenly felt so protective of the man at your right. The group eventually scurried off, possibly terrified of your facial expressions, and it was weird that the satisfaction you felt was good enough of a reason to justify your actions. Enishi saw the exchange and struggled to keep his laughter in.

"I suggest you to keep your claws hidden tonight."

You turned to face him, eyes narrowing onto his. What was that supposed to mean?

"Are you suggesting I'm jealous or something?"

"Maybe."

"Last time I checked we weren't a couple or anything," you said wrapping your arms around your chest.

He looked around before he pushed you to a wall behind you, hands firmly gripping yours. Playfulness and seriousness were dancing around in his eyes and you couldn't tell which one peered more into your eyes right now. He stood so close to you that you forgot how to breathe. His eyes darted between your own and your lips, leaning closer to your face. Stopping just a few inches off your lips you felt your patience running thin. All you wanted to do was close the distance between you. He closed his eyes and blew a breath that hit your lips.

"Don't fall for me, Miyu," he whispered loud enough for only you to hear.

I think it's a little too late for that.

You had enough of getting teased so you made a move for his lips. Your lips barely brushed his before he pulled away from you, signature smirk on his face.

"We're on enemy territory so keep an eye out."

With that he turned around and walked off, leaving you there nothing short of confused. You released a breath and leaned on the wall for support, the ghost of his touch still lingering on your arms.

He was back to leading you on and you couldn't tell if it was just an act this time or it was what he actually felt for you. He was cold again but this time it seemed different, like he was forcing it. The minute you both stepped out of the house he would turn into this other person that liked taunting you.

You slept together for so many times and it still seemed to be no strings attached for him. But it made you crave more than that. You couldn't deny that your feelings for him were real but you couldn't tell if they were strong enough to push for them when you knew deep down that this back and forth will never be something more than that. And that kinda felt like an arrow was shot straight through your heart.

Every time you kissed him ran through your mind. You wanted to find at least one that you could hang onto that was sincere. But most of them were fuelled by anger and hunger. You never kissed each other with real feelings and you felt like a fool for thinking it could ever be more than back and forth with him.

You shook the thoughts form your head and walked to catch up to him. If it was up to you you would've left after that stunt he pulled. But you were here for your mom first and foremost. These mind games could wait.

Making your way downstairs into the main room where everyone gathered you looked around for him but he was nowhere in sight, figuring you lost him in the big crowd.

Great. What am I supposed to do now?

The band started playing a slow song and you recognised it to be the one of the tunes for the Viennese waltz. A small smile cracked on your lips at the memory of your father teaching it to you. He would place you on his tiptoes and swing you around the living room while your mother sat and clapped for you as your audience. They taught you all kinds of dances to help you fit in easier with the higher status people.

Didn't think the mafia rolled with this much finesse.

The dancefloor cleared as everyone split into pairs and you found yourself alone in the middle. As much as you would have loved to dance you didn't feel like it. You were about to walk off until an arm pulled you back, making you collide with a sturdy chest. The familiar jasmine smell was enough to make you grunt in annoyance as you turned to the man before you. He held your hand as he stepped away to do a curtsy, moving your other hand to sit on his shoulders as he gripped the other one. You tried prying your hands off but the hold he had on you was way too firm. He wouldn't let you go unless he wanted to and he seemed hellbent on doing so.

"Let me go," you gritted out. A few pairs looked at you struggling and you both flashed your fake smiles telling them kindly to fuck off.

"The music already started so let's just do this."

"I don't want to do anything with you."

You looked away from him getting into your position as you started leading him, stepping forward with your left foot. He tried to take the lead away from you but you were better at this than he was, getting your uncoordinated waltz in rhythm with the music. He noticed the weight you stepped with from side to side and could feel the tension just from holding your waist.

"Why are you suddenly mad at me?"

"Because.."

Because you almost kissed me. Because the way you touch me makes me want to run for the hills. Because you're a coward and can't admit to your feelings. Because I hate you.

"Because what?"

You separated to do a spin and came back to him. His hands landed a little lighter on your waist this time around.

"I don't know I just am."

The swaying pairs around you faded to a blur as your bodies got closer and you spun together to the music, swaying left and right. The fact that he knew how to dance the waltz amazed you a little. He seemed to have a lot of tricks hidden up his sleeve.

There was no denying he liked the female attention. Even while he danced so close to you you could feel the lonely girls by the side of the dancefloor staring holes through the back of your head. You knew exactly how they felt because you couldn't help but swoon at his charms too. That was until you got too annoyed by his staring.

"Can you stop looking at my boobs?"

"It's not my fault they are up in my face."

"Jesus Christ."

Parting away from each other again, you lifted your palms to sit against each other. Your warm fingertips met his cold ones again as you circled each other. It took every ounce of self control in your being not to intertwine your fingers together. You were mad at how quickly you went from hating to appreciating him.

You went for the final waltz section of the dance and prayed for the music to end faster. He took the lead this time and you followed suit.

He kept his eyes on you the whole time trying to figure out what you were thinking in that little head of yours. The tension between you was suffocating. You were back to the normal push and pull, getting too close to keep his hands off of you, but too far to actually touch you. He didn't want to push you away or play pretend but he didn't know what else to do to keep his urges away. Staying away from you was better than being this close to you and not knowing what to do or say.

Getting too lost in his own thoughts he took a wrong step that made you lose your footing. You thought you were going to kiss the floor if it wasn't for his hands catching you. You were bent backwards with one of your hands fisted in the collar of his blazer. One of his arms wrapped around your torso and the other sat at the back of your neck supporting your head. Maybe it was the thrill of danger from all the eyes looking at you that you felt like you couldn't take your eyes off of his. He seemed so close yet so far, easy but so hard to get through.

The music ended and you stepped away from him thanking all gods for the late but welcome help. You needed a drink if you wanted to get through the night so you headed to the bar leaving him on the dancefloor.

---------------

You were on your fourth vodka cocktail when he joined you at the bar. You cursed your high tolerance to alcohol wishing to be tipsier than you felt so you could deal with him in a way that your conscience wouldn't scold you for.

"You should slow down on those."

"I can do whatever the fuck I want."

He didn't know where this attitude came from. He was a little annoyed by it but he brushed it off to be just one of your mood swings.

"Okay, so, what's holding us back from going in?"

"There's about ten armed guards on every floor."

"If that's a problem I think you're forgetting we took down a whole gang in that casino using our wits and wooden chairs."

"The problem is that once they see us coming they will sound the alarm to everyone else and we will be fucked. There's five mafias present and the last thing I want is a gang war."

"That's what you said last time and the Daos kinda went extinct the minute we got involved."

You had a point. But it was still too dangerous to go in through the front. He studied the map of the place countless times and knew there was a hidden staircase with access to all levels. It was typically the maids who had access to it. He looked around and spotted one at the far corner with a tray of finger foods in her hands.

"I will be right back. Behave yourself."

You would've smacked him if it wasn't for the crowd around you. Following him with your eyes through the sea of people you saw him approach a maid. What was he gonna do with a maid?

Your question was answered when you saw him plaster that playboy smirk on his face, leaning down to whisper in her ear. She giggled at whatever he told her and you gripped your glass tightly. The scene made your jaw clench even if you had no reason to feel like that.

Keep it together. We are not a couple. This is all just for show.

After more flirting, he came back and you threw the last contents in your glass down your throat. He dangled a set of keys in front of you and you looked at him confused.

"The maids have access to a hidden staircase at the back of the mansion. It leads to all levels including the top one where she said the rest of the maids are gathered up."

"Those open the doors to this secret magical staircase?"

"Yes."

Maybe you went a little too far with your sarcasm but it was the only way you could keep yourself from snapping at him. He only shook his head at you and lead the way.

You circled the entire mansion through the garden at the back. Whenever people passed by you, Enishi would hold your hand and smile to make it believable that you looked like a couple and that you weren't doing anything you shouldn't be doing. You played along leaning closer to him and smacking his chest as you laughed. It disgusted you, playing pretend like this when you wanted it to be real.

Once you were out of sight you looked for the staircase. You found it under a deep layer of wild vine and unlocked the doors, locking them after you entered. A few lanterns lined up the wall all the way to the top but it was still too dark to see anything. You went up first, lifting your dress up so you wouldn't step on it. The long ruffles covered the front part and you couldn't see where you were stepping. You got halfway up the stairs and placed your foot wrong on a step, stumbling backwards colliding with Enishi's chest for the second time tonight. One of his hands wrapped securely around your waist while the other gripped the railing.

"You should be more careful," he said breathlessly.

"I am-" you started but were cut off by the sound of guards patrolling at the top of the stairs.

Suddenly, you were pressed against the inner wall of the staircase, his body impossibly close to yours. The proximity made your heartbeat accelerated and you shut your eyes to take a few breaths in. The way his head dipped down to your neck gave you a thrilling sense of deja vu, reminding you of the night you hid in an alley from guards patrolling the city. You couldn't deny the attraction between you back then but you looked for every reason to do it now. Your hand laid on his chest and you could feel his rapid heartbeat under your finger tips. You opened your eyes and tilted your head at him.

If your body says it wants me why does your mind keep pushing me away?

His eyes turned from the top of the staircase to you laying on your lips again. He's gone too long without your taste and it was driving him crazy. All he wanted to do was kiss them sweetly until he drew blood. He thought just one taste would quench his thirst so he leaned down to you again. But this time, you didn't let him play with you.

The coast cleared and you pushed him away, making your way towards the top. You beckoned him over and checked the hallway to see it empty. He huffed and made his way to you.

"You take the ones on the left," he said.

"I'll take the ones on the right," you said at the same time.

You couldn't come to terms with anything and it pushed your buttons greatly. Shaking your head, you moved to the ones on the right without saying anything else. Wasting time you didn't have wasn't on your list right now. You needed to find your mom ASAP unless you wanted to piss off some blood-thirsty mafias by snooping around their palace.

Opening door after door you found either a guest room fixed up by a few maids or a storage space where they put cleaning supplies away. The next one you opened was a bathroom occupied by a couple who appeared to be making out or having a contest on who could eat the other's face off first. You couldn't really tell. They stopped their smooching to look at you startled.

"My bad. Uh... enjoy yourselves. Use protection," you yelled and closed the door leaning on it in embarrassment.

Enishi just closed the last door on his side and you looked at him hopeful only to have your hopes crushed when he shook his head.

"Only young maids on this side. What about you?"

"Loads of maids and I think I just cockblocked a couple."

He started laughing and you clamped a hand on his mouth reminding him no one needed to know you were there. You turned your attention back to the hallway. There was one last door to check on your side and you prayed to all gods she would be in there.

You moved to the door placing a shaky hand on the golden doorknob and you froze. You had no way of knowing if she was going to be behind that door or if something else would wait for you. You hoped you didn't come this far for nothing because if you did it would break you. Conscious of time ticking away, you drew in a shaky breath and tried to push through your hesitation and move your hand to open the door. But you couldn't open it.

Enishi saw you struggling. He knew how badly you wanted her to be inside that room. If she wasn't in there you were going to blame yourself for it even if it wasn't your fault. This was exactly why he didn't want you to come in the first place. He knew if there was nothing behind that door that it would break you. You hung with your teeth onto the little hope that the information you got from that asshole was true and he wished it was too.

He placed his hand on top of yours in reassurance and you looked at him. He was back to being his serious self, the Enishi who promised you he would help you get your parents back no matter what. With a deep breath, you both turned the doorknob and pushed the door open. Your breath got stuck in your throat at the sight before you.

"Miyu?"

No fucking way.

---------------------------------------------------------

Thank you for reading! As always, likes, comments and reblogs are welcome :)

---

AAAHHHHH!!!!! WAIT, OH MY GOD!!! WHAT?!

Sir, are you trying to kill me? (Free headlock?)

---

Chaos in Their Bones Ch.8

Ongoing Series

Synopsis: All your life you’d listened to your friend, Usopp spin wild tales about pirates and adventure. Pirates weren’t a thing that came often to Syrup Village, but one straw hat pirate and his crew changed all that the day they arrived. Now, you aren’t so sure if your sleepy little village was always pirate-free or if no one had been paying attention.  

Pairing: Roronoa Zoro x Reader

Genre: friends to lovers, frenemies to lovers, idiots to lovers, slow burn (I hope y’all like aching) eventual smut

Words: 30.8k

A/N:  Whelp. Here she is. The beginning of the climax. A gigantic piece of a chapter that hopefully has everything you all hoped it would be. Just know she is hefty. If there are any errors or anything I will have to die on that hill. So many important things happen this chapter and I can’t wait to see how everyone is feeling once you’ve read this hefty hefty girl. I did take some inspiration from the Salem Witch Trials. You’ve all been warned. And as always: Thank You. For always being so kind and loving my story as much as you all do. I hope you all continue to enjoy it 🖤 Much Love, Jenn

Chapter 1  Chapter 2  Chapter 3  Chapter 4  Chapter 5  Chapter 6 Previous

Warnings: mentions of torture, use of OPLA dialogue, swearing 

Zoro could’ve gone a whole lifetime without ever having to see this clown again. By the way Usopp and Sanji weren’t acting the least bit surprised to see Buggy, it informed him that they must have seen him already. And if Usopp and Sanji met Buggy did that mean you had, as well? When would that have even happened? 

Zoro’s brain struggled to think about how the clown had even shown up at Baratie. It didn’t take him long to realize that he must have come on the back of one of the fishmen that attacked Baratie. On one of the fishmen who’d taken you. Buggy was back to trying to spit the sand off his bottom lip and, for the first time, Zoro thanked whatever high and mighty power was listening that they had one last moment of silence. 

“It doesn’t get any easier looking at him like this.”

“He’s even more of a pain in the ass when he has all of his parts,” Zoro retorted. “Be grateful it’s just the head.”

He was still trying to decide if he shouldn’t just stuff him back in the bag and throw him overboard. Buggy’s…neck was bouncing around the table as if he was looking for something - someone - specific. Zoro could feel a fresh surge of irritation rush through him just before the stupid clown opened his mouth. 

“Why is it such a sausage fest all of the sudden, huh? What happened to the ladies? Did they finally come to their senses and realize what a group of shit-tastic waste of time you all are?”

“Why is he still allowed to talk?” Sanji asked, walking around the other side of the island. 

“Because he is going to tell us where to find Nami and Doc,” Luffy replied. 

He looked so hopeful. Zoro wished he could share the same feeling, but he wouldn’t trust this clown within an inch of his life. But if it meant whatever information he gave led him to where you were, well…

“And my body! Don’t forget about my body.”

“Your body comes at the price of information, Bungy.”

“Oh, for crying out loud! It’s Buggy!”

“No one cares about your name, clown,” Zoro bit out. “We just need the coordinates.”

When the cold blue of Buggy’s eyes scaled over him, Zoro felt a new ripple of irritation run across his skin. He fought not to shake it out of his body as he continued to lean against the island. The ache of his wounds grew with each passing second, and with every expanse his chest made when he took a breath reminded him he wasn’t a hundred percent. 

He thought by the grin that slid over Buggy’s face that the clown was going to comment on his wounds. Throw more salt in an already painful reminder. As it turned out, what Buggy had planned to say was much, much worse. 

“Don’t worry lover boy I’ll get you back to your little sweetie pie. Wouldn’t want you both to miss out on any unnecessary pining! Am I right?!”

His obnoxious laughter filled the galley and it reminded Zoro of nails on a chalkboard. His jaw ticked like a time bomb while he watched the clown look around the cabin at every other face. When he realized no one else was laughing he quickly stopped with a grumble. 

“So, where exactly did Arlong take them?” 

“Arlong’s found himself a little slice of heaven on the Conomi Islands. The perfect base between every adjacent island to it and Marine base stationed close by.”

“Why would anyone, let alone a pirate, want to be close to a Marine base?”

This came from the waiter. Zoro felt his eyes flick over to where Sanji stood. It was the same spot he’d been in the last night he’d seen you. The night he’d told Nami she didn’t have friends - that they weren’t her friends when that was the farthest thing from the truth. Zoro could recall the look of disappointment - the outrage - that flashed behind your eyes as if you were standing there right now beside him. 

Zoro gave a light shake of his head to bring him back to the present. His body turned to mirror the waiter as a fresh wave of pain blossomed in his chest. The wound no doubt seeping fresh blood while he positioned his arms out against the island. He needed to stay focused and not on past memories he couldn’t change. 

“It’s a great plan as long as you pay a Marine captain to turn a blind eye.”

Zoro’s voice still sounded like he’d gargled with glass and tried to speak over the cuts. Lack of use and too much sleep would do that to someone. 

“Ding, ding, ding! Lover boy buzzes in for the win.”

“Stop calling me that,” Zoro snapped. 

His eyes lifted up from the island to bore into Buggy’s moving head. What was more frustrating was his words didn’t seem to worry the clown one bit. 

“Just calling it like I see it champ. Although, I must say, I’ve heard some cold blooded denials in my time - specifically said to me - but never anything as gut wrenching as that.”

“Shut. Up.”

“No wonder Doc ran into Arlong’s big fishy arms-“

“I said shut up!”

What the hell was Buggy even talking about? How could he have possibly even known what was said between the two of you that night? The way it had torn him apart inside to tell you that you weren’t wanted - that he didn’t want you - when it was the farthest thing from the truth. He had his dreams and promises to keep, but what good was any of it if you weren’t here?

Maybe he didn’t deserve you or your forgiveness for what he’d done - what he’d said. Zoro couldn’t lie and say if he went back in time anything would change. Could he be selfish enough to tell you how he felt and ask you to wait? 

Since he’d woken up, besides the haunting news of you leaving had resided inside his thoughts, so did the memory of your body caving in on the Merry’s ramp. You looked so broken - your chest noticeably collapsing with every rapid breath you took. All he wanted to do was comfort you and he’d tried in his own way. Instead, Zoro knew he might have broken you more in a different way. 

That moment was the first time in his life he wanted to forget about honor and shame. To drop everything and run to you because the regret of not telling you the truth about how he felt about you weighed heavier than any shame ever could. His regret ate at him with every waking minute until it burned molten with rage and threatened to turn his words into venom. 

Underneath that was the fear of what if they reached you too late? 

Zoro refused to entertain those thoughts. Whether you could forgive him or not, Zoro knew one thing was certain. He would bring you back home. 

“Okay, okay, Romeo god you know the hair is attached.”

Zoro hadn’t realized he’d rushed forward towards the clown. That he clutched his head with his fingers holding him tight by the blue strands of his hair. Luffy was there. A calm hand on his wrist and speaking to him lightly to let the clown head go. He released him and quickly moved back to the other side of the island. Away from Usopp and definitely away from where that waiter had moved up beside him. 

He needed a drink. 

Zoro was vaguely aware that they were all talking. That Luffy had placed the clown back inside the black bag and was saying something to all of them. It was time to make a plan, but plans were Nami’s thing. 

“That’s your thing, right? Plans?”

Why did he give a shit about her? It was her fault that they were in this mess. The reason you no doubt went with Arlong. Sure, Zoro knew you did it to save Luffy. He always knew you were the type to sacrifice yourself for others without even blinking. It’s what made him absolutely crazy. Underneath all that though, he knew how close you were to Nami. You saw something in her the same way Luffy did. 

As much as you went to save Luffy, Zoro knew you went to save Nami too. 

He finally ripped open a crate and found bottles of his beer untouched and waiting for him. He couldn’t grab one fast enough to uncap it and bring it to his lips. He was still drinking when Luffy came to the edge of the island and looked around at all of them. 

“With Buppy’s help we’ll get the coordinates to the Conomi Islands. That’s our first step.” 

“Okay, but how do we know he isn’t just going to lead us directly into a trap?” Usopp asked. 

“Man has a point.”

Zoro took one last large gulp from the bottle at the sound of the waiter's input. 

“Whether we like it or not, he’s our only chance at finding them. We’re going to have to put a little faith that he wants his body back enough to get us there. We’ll deal with whatever else happens when we get there.”

Zoro found a spot to rest his back against the cabinets. His focus trained on Luffy. He was always so sure of himself. When plans went to shit he didn’t panic. Luffy just went with the flow believing that everything would just work itself out somehow. Zoro wishes he could share in that kind of optimism right now. 

“And what if we just get there and Nami leads us into another trap?”

He didn’t want to be the one to say it, but he wanted to be realistic. It could happen again. She could use you against them. Against him. Without missing a beat, Luffy looked over at him and softly smiled. 

“Nami won’t do that.”

“You don’t know that,” Zoro shot back bitterly.

“Just as much as you don’t know if she will,” Sanji barked back in reply. 

His eyes narrowed in on the waiter with the bottle tapping against his thigh. 

“Last I checked, you were here to make sandwiches. Not give an opinion nobody asked for.” 

A scoff exited from between Sanji’s mouth as he looked away from him. Zoro could see the tick in his jaw. Sanji seemed to be fighting not to reply with a heated reply back to him, and he was proven right when Sanji looked back at him. His shoulders squared up and with icy blue eyes as defiant as Nami’s were that night they shared their last drink. 

“Guys, we don’t have time for this,” Usopp huffed. 

“You’re right. I’ll be a better man and move on. For now.” 

Zoro was most definitely going to kick him overboard the first chance he got. 

“I’m going to take Bungy to the deck and start getting the coordinates. Usopp, if you can join me in a few.”

“You got it, Luffy.”

Luffy grabbed the bag and it quickly erupted in muffled ramblings from the clown inside. Zoro couldn’t catch much, but the mumbling sounded like a lot of bitching about Luffy saying his name wrong. Repeatedly. All three of them remained where they were with no one seeming to want to move. 

Usopp stepped out of the way as Sanji began to remove his coat. His hands rolled up the sleeves of his dress shirt as he moved inside the kitchen as if he’d been there for years. It sent a fresh surge of irritation coursing through Zoro’s body, and he tried to quill it by finishing the beer that was left in the waiting bottles. 

He was reaching into the crate when he heard the waiter speak again. Your name rushing past his lips like the guy had the right to fucking say it. Zoro’s thumb flicked the lid off the beer and the force sent it flying across the room. 

“What did the waiter just say?”

“This waiter,” Sanji snapped back, “just asked what you possibly could’ve said to make her break like that.”

“How about you worry about whether the eggs are too runny.”

“Doc deserves to have someone love her back the way she loves them.”

He hated the way he said your name - your nickname - like you were close friends. As if he’d spent time with you while he was asleep. Maybe he had and that made Zoro’s eyes practically bleed to dark pits. 

“You’ve been here all of five minutes. You don’t know shit about what’s going on-“

“I know enough to say that if you do that again to her Mosshead, I’ll be the one there to pick up the pieces.” 

Sanji’s words sliced through his own to silence whatever Zoro was going to tell him. The man didn’t flinch as Zoro took a threatening step towards him, while he pulled out another pan and grabbed a bag of rice.

“You won’t be going anywhere near her-“

“Hey Zoro, not to but in-“

“You’re butting in.”

Usopp swallowed around his need to flee and stood his ground. Zoro had to give him props for that. He was sure he looked ready to slice them both in half at any minute.

 “But maybe this could all have been avoided if you’d just told Doc how you felt.” 

Zoro looked away from them both. His eyes scanning every inch of the galley as he tried to imagine telling the woman who joined up with Arlong he had feelings for her. That all he wanted to do that night in the galley when you stood in front of him blanketed in moonlight and stars was to kiss you. To lace his hand into that stupid corset shirt Nami let you borrow and keep you locked in a place where you couldn’t run away. Not anymore. Not ever again. What he settled on was, “I’m not good at talking. I hit things.”

“We know,” Usopp and Sanji both blurted out together, equally sounding like different pitches of annoyance. 

“You’re a waiter. You don’t know anything about me, and you sure as shit don’t know anything about Doc.”

“I know a big green-haired idiot who would allow a beautiful and talented woman get away from him when I see one.”

Yeah, Zoro was going to have to do something about this waiter. Every time he mentioned anything about you, it made him want to throw Sanji over the side of the Merry. He’d been wanting to do that since they left Baratie, but he’d been holding back the urge because he’d already knew what Luffy would do. Now though, Zoro felt like he could take whatever scolding Luffy might give him just to have the satisfaction of watching Sanji tread water. 

“I’m willing to bet I also know more about her than you do, at this point. Since, you know, talking is hard and all.”

Sanji sent a shit eating grin in his direction and Zoro hadn’t realized he’d started moving around the island until Usopp appeared next to him. A heavy, “Whoa, okay guys,” practically squeezed out of him with his arms lightly raised as if he was too scared to actually spread them out any farther to keep the two of them apart. 

“Come on, guys. We have bigger things to worry about then squabbling between each other. And if Sanji even knows anything about Doc it’s kind of my fault.”

But Zoro did know you. Maybe not in the way of your life story of your past, but you weren’t your past. Zoro knew of your present and that included the way your lips parted when you were deep in thought. The way you would begin to fidget when you weren’t sure what to do with your hands when you weren’t working on medicines or patients. He knew your favorite place to sit at night was the stern of the ship when the gusts of the wind from the push of the oceans waves sent your hair flying up around you like midnight flames. 

Sure. Zoro didn’t know much about your past, but he knew the fine details of who you were now, and that’s what mattered.

Zoro just looked at him. He wasn’t sure if Usopp expected him to verbally tell him to continue, but Zoro was quickly hitting his word limit for the day. He only responded by lifting his beer to his lips and drinking. 

“I may have brought up the time that Doc was magically dropped off by a siren from the sea.”

Zoro could feel his eyes slowly blinking. The lip of the bottle pulled on his bottom lip as he waited for Usopp to bust into his usual large grin that told him plainly he was joking. The only problem? Usopp was just staring at him waiting for his reaction. 

“I thought it was a sea witch?”

“No, no,” Usopp replied to Sanji, “Doc says sea witch because that’s what the kids called her. She likes it cause it also makes her sound scarier than she is. I say siren because it makes it more exotic and sexy.”

Zoro could tell his face was probably colored in confusion. The only remedy was another drink of beer. 

“When was this ever mentioned?”

The minute he asked, Zoro instantly regretted it. Instead of Usopp answering him, the waiter felt compelled to continue bugging the shit out of him. 

“It was brought up while we were doing all the hard work and you were getting your beauty sleep.”

“The hard work of losing half the crew and almost letting Luffy die? Yeah, you did great.” 

He knew he hit a sore spot. Usually, by now he would see the sharp intake of breath as Sanji prepared himself to respond. This time he focused on measuring out the rice. It was well and good with him. 

The silence suited him just fine. Zoro was tired of the back and forth. It wasn’t making him feel better. It wasn’t fixing the situation that they were all currently in, and it most definitely wasn’t leading him any closer to finding you. Suddenly, he felt like he needed to leave. He wasn’t sure if he was actually tired or if his lack of control of his emotions was starting to take a toll. 

He didn’t need to lose control in front of them. 

Without saying a word, Zoro turned and headed through the galley’s doors. He couldn’t move as fast as he wanted, but it didn’t stop him from making quick work across the deck to the safety of his room. He was vaguely aware that Luffy was calling to him from somewhere. He didn’t have it in him to look up for him - to see what it is his captain needed. 

He made it around the corner of the door and into the short hallway of the crew quarters. His room was close. He just needed to go a few extra feet and he would be in the loving embrace of his hammock and-

His hand stopped short on the doorknob. His forehead leaning against the wood of the door and the rush of his warm breath touching across his face. 

When did he start to hyperventilate? 

No. He didn’t do this. He didn’t react like this so why was he? Glancing over his shoulder, Zoro felt his heart pivot down to his knees. A flurry of emotion moved inside his chest as he struggled to glance past the ghost of you that was staring back at him over your shoulder. 

You thought you were sly. You probably thought he didn’t notice the way you lingered at the door just a few seconds more after you’d told him good night. Zoro was sure the look was meant to be innocent, but the feelings it stirred inside him were far from it. 

How many times had you whispered across the small space between you, “Sweet dreams.” How many times had he wanted to turn around and grab your hand? To pull you to him and trap your body between the wood of his door and his body? Too many times. 

Zoro expected to hear the soft sound of your voice telling him the usual night time routine you’d started. His body even waited before pushing inside his room just in case he’d hear you. Zoro knew it wasn't possible. 

You weren’t here. 

His body fell into his hammock with the Wado Ichimonji clutched in his hand. Zoro was struggling to get comfortable, which usually never happened. He was known for being able to get comfortable practically anywhere, and his hammock was one of his favorite and easiest places for him to usually fall into and sleep. 

Not now. He couldn’t get his thoughts to turn off. To quiet down long enough for your face not to flash behind his eyes every time he closed them. He’d placed the Wado on top of his chest. A hand still clutched to the sheathed blade as he tried to play it cool. His free hand tucked behind his head as he stared up at the ceiling of his cabin. 

“Sweet dreams, Zoro.” 

It was three simple words but the way you’d looked at him as you spoke them…

That look wasn’t simple. It was wrapped in longing and begged for him to stop being a coward and unwrap it. 

Coward. 

That’s what he called you once. What did that make him now? Zoro could feel his heart hammering against his chest demanding he make the decision to get up and move. To cross that threshold of only a couple feet and knock on your door and push you back inside the way you’d done to him the very first time you’d meet. 

Zoro could still remember the shock of your hand shoving against his chest. The way you’d confidentially kicked the door shut behind you. What he recalled the most was his favorite thing now to see on you: the warmth of a blush creeping up your cheeks. The realization of what you’d done, the uncertainty, flickered through your eyes like a shooting star. It was so bright, he thought you would back up; turn tail and run. You’d surprised him by staying. It’d surprised him more when he was glad you did. 

Before he realized it, his feet swung out of the hammock and walked to the door. The Wado still clutched in his hand, but the other was now wrapped around the knob of the door. 

He could do this. He would tell you that he felt the same. He would no longer steal glances at your lips and wonder what they would feel like against his. He would claim them as his own the minute you opened that door. 

But he couldn’t, could he? 

You weren’t here. The ache of something missing in his chest was real.  Zoro had missed his chance, and the reality was he wasn’t sure if he’d ever get a second one. 

Chew came in shortly after Nami left. 

His entire body reeked like a distillery that had swallowed a smaller distillery whole. You wondered if he was attached to every bottle he came in contact with or if it was just impulse that kept one in his hands at all times. On a better day you might have asked him, but currently every time your mouth moved it cracked open fresh new cuts on your busted lips. 

Your right eye was almost completely swollen shut. The only plus side to not being able to see out of both eyes was the fact it had happened gradually. You could still see a sliver of light through it; just enough to see the tip of Chew’s boots as he stopped in front of you. Your good eye opened just in time to see him crouch before you. His large lips taking in the tip of his latest bottle and taking a deep pull of the liquor it held within. 

“You think you can still make medicine looking like that?”

“I don’t know,” you croaked. “If you hit the other side of my face it might make it hard to see.”

“Ha! You’re right about that.”

You hated the way he smiled like it was a joke. The way he carelessly took another sip and the easy way he was able to get up and leave. Although, he wasn’t leaving yet. If he was here it meant Kuroobi would be there soon riding on the curt tails of Arlong. 

Chew moved around you in a tight circle. His eyes scan the bindings of the rope around your arms and wrists as if you somehow magically found a way out. There wasn’t an ounce of you that didn’t wish you could break your bindings like the magician who’d come to the Gecko Islands that year for Kaya’s birthday. Sure, you knew it was all bullshit, but you would’ve given anything in this moment for it to be real. Even just a little. 

Everything hurt. 

In the few moments you had left before Arlong arrived again, you needed to take stock of your current injuries. While your right eye was like a golf ball in size, it wasn’t broken. Nothing on you seemed broken yet but you knew it was becoming a dangerous possibility. One that Arlong seemed to know how to dance around perfectly. 

You weren’t sure what they had planned for you with your upper body tied up in ropes, but you knew it wasn’t good. People, or fishmen, didn’t do this to someone unless they planned something incredibly unpleasant. Lucky for you, you were invited to a private party with you being the lucky plus one. 

Yay you.  

Chew moved to sit on one of the steps just as the double metal doors were shoved open. Arlong made his usual grand entrance and you weren’t sure who exactly it was for. It’s not like you could actually see him coming in with whatever dramatic flourish he was hoping for. 

“I hope you were able to get a good night's rest,” he chortled. “You’re going to need all the strength you have left for what I have planned.”

“And what is that, exactly?”

“Patience. You’ll find out what I have in store for you. All in good time.”

You weren’t sure why seeing Kuroobi stand behind Arlong like a bodyguard bothered you as much as it did. The way the man made sure to stick his fins out farther to make himself seem bigger, more imposing than he already was. You still held a grudge for him using you as a battering ram to open the door. The bruises that scattered themselves along your arms and part of your back told the tale of that encounter very well. 

But who was Kuroobi trying to protect Arlong from? You?

“Of course, maybe you could save us the trouble if you just tell me what you are.”

Confusion colored your vision as you looked between the three of them. You were positive your brow would’ve creased if it could, unfortunately your skin could barely move past the swelling that was your face. 

“Okay. You’ve piqued my curiosity. What the hell are you talking about?” 

Every time Arlong smiled it made your stomach twist. It had to be one of the most unpleasant things you’d been forced to look at. His smiles never came from something lighthearted or joyful. Arlong’s smile came from the depths of the ocean; from where sea monsters buried jolly rogers and their men. It promised violence instead of warmth and currently it was always directed towards you. 

“No, no, see you don’t get to play coy any longer. Not after what you did.”

What did you do? What could you have done that was so bad to make them see you as a threat? Cry? Vomit on their shoes? 

You weren’t Luffy or Sanji when it came to being a fighter. You definitely weren’t scary and a damn good fighter like Zoro. You also didn’t have a knack for making special ammo for a slingshot like Usopp. The only thing you were capable of was turning the helpfulness of plants into medicine and, sometimes, making poisons out of them. Something you’d promised yourself you would never do. So, how were you supposed to take Arlong seriously when they acted like a bunch of scaredy cats? 

Maybe you could use this to your advantage.

“You know what? You’re right, Arlong.” You hoped you sounded braver than you felt. “And if you don’t want to experience what happened again, but worse, I suggest you untie me. Or, you know, spooky things will happen.”

They all looked at you as if you’d gone insane. No one made a sound for a split second before Arlong, Kuroobi, and Chew burst into laughter. 

“Eh, that was good, that was good. For not even a second did I believe a word you just said. But…we have ways of making you talk.”

The last few words growled from behind his teeth as he took a few steps towards you. As if you needed any reminding on what kind of individual you were dealing with. 

“You can beat me all you want. I won’t be able to make anything or do anything for you if I’m too dead to do it”

You prayed you sounded braver than you felt. You weren’t a particular fan of what was currently going on. Although, you weren’t sure anyone would claim torture was a good bonding exercise with your new captain. 

Gods, you really missed Luffy. 

“Oh, I’m not going to kill you. Yet.”

“Well, that is extremely less comforting than I’d hoped,” you mumbled. 

Arlong began to walk towards you but in the presence of your voice he stopped. You forgot how much he loved just hearing himself talk and how the sound of anything else was an act of defiance. 

“I won’t kill you until you can answer one simple question for me.” Arlong paused for dramatic effect. His words sink into the corners of your mind to dig up a fresh wave of curiosity. He waited long enough to know he had you before he finished with a smile, “What are you, girl.”

“Wait. What?”

You could feel your good eye blink rapidly along with every thought that bombarded you in trying to make sense of what he just said. You looked down at your body to make sure that you were still a person. That you had two arms, currently wrapped behind your back, and was still wearing Nami’s spaghetti strap shirt she’d given you. So, it begged the question: what the fuck was Arlong talking about?

“Do you think I’m stupid because I’m a fishmen? That I wouldn’t be able to see a snake trying to work its way onto my property?”

“I’m literally just a human.”

“Just a human can't do the things you did in here yesterday.”

Again, you looked around the room and wondered if at any time someone was going to pop in and say this was a joke. A part of you hoped that was exactly what would happen because the more you stared at Arlong the more you realized the current danger you were in. He must have seen the thought drive itself home because that sickly smile crept back on his face. 

“I. Am. Just. A. Human.”

You tried to drive every word home with a metaphorical hammer. Each one ladden with irritation but underneath that was the blinding dread that something very bad was about to happen. 

Your suspicions were rewarded as Arlong closed the last remaining space between you. His large webbed hand reached out to painfully wrap around your face and yank your head upwards to look at him. You wanted to appear defiant. To pretend that with each passing second that he tightened his hands on your face it didn’t make you want to scream as your jaw felt ready to fracture. 

All your bravery dissipated as his hand closed tight enough around your jaw it sent the inside flesh of your cheeks to slide across your teeth. Instantly, a soft cry of pain filtered through the open gap of your mouth and Arlong smiled. 

“Go ahead and keep lying. The water’s edge will be the only thing filling your lungs for a while. See if the ocean wishes to reclaim you.” 

If Arlong hoped his words would elicit some sort of confession out of panic to save yourself he was wrong. The only thing it did was spark a fresh wave of fear to wash over you. It was a palpable thing. You could feel it worming its way ínside your chest, threatening to make you sick. You didn’t care if the sadistic smile that grew on his face came from that sickness. He enjoyed watching the currant of emotions that rushed through you. Everyone one of them stemming from the terror of being placed anywhere near water. 

You could still recall seven-year-old you willingly following the older kids to the beach. The way a fresh wave of hope brewed in your heart that maybe - just maybe - they were finally going to play with you. 

Coben was the one that started it. First, it was just a joke. Something sharp and cruel that reminded all the other kids in the group you weren’t like the rest. You didn’t belong. 

“I hear the ocean at nights been crying. Crying because one of her children is missing. If you listen now you can hear her saying a name.”

He created a seashell with his hands and began to call your name inside the echoing walls of his palms. You could still remember the way the hope shattered and the panic quickly filled the pieces. The warning of adrenaline coming all too late that Coben and the other kids never intended to let you play any games with them. 

You were the game. 

In seconds they were on you. A centipede of hands grasping at your arms and legs to bring your struggling body to the water. They’d dropped you fast a few feet into the waves - allowing you a millisecond to lift up from the rush of a wave to gasp for air - just before Coben’s hands at your throat shoved you back down. 

There were moments still when the feeling of water rushing into your lungs startled you awake at night. Your hands frantically moving around you to make sure you were safe in bed. That the sheering burn of pain in your chest was a terrible memory. 

You’d almost died that day. You should’ve died if it wasn’t for Usopp. 

You didn’t hear him or see him run up screaming. You just knew one minute Coben’s preteen hands were wrapped around your throat, and the next, you were up ended with Coben as Usopp slammed into him. 

There was no one else to help him. If the group turned on him he would meet the same fate as you, but he didn’t care. 

You were too weak to pull yourself out from the non stop crashing of wave after wave of fresh water. Your mouth vomiting up fresh salt water and bile while your lungs burned at the feeling of air. 

“Get out of here! Before I tell!” 

It wasn’t hard to see Usopp was scared. It was apparent in the saucer size stare of his eyes as they shifted back and forth between everyone. His homemade slingshot pulled back at the ready and loaded with another sharp rock. You’d thought Usopp had shoved Coben off you, but it wasn’t until he’d risen from where he’d collapsed at the ocean’s edge that the blood from an open wound was traveling down the side of his face. 

A fear like ice gripped your heart for those few seconds as Coben seemed to calculate his next move. If they tried to attack Usopp, you would do whatever it took to make sure he made it home to his mom. You didn’t have to worry about any further confrontation. 

“Come on boys. Let’s leave the freaks to themselves.”

Usopp waited until he was sure that they’d all left before he’d dropped his arms. His hands quickly put away his slingshot while he rushed to your side. It was Usopp who saved you. Who pulled you out of the water and held you as you’d sobbed. 

Unlike all of his other memories Usopp turned into stories of his grand adventures and heroics, this was the one story he never retold. 

What Arlong must have thought was that you were afraid it would make you talk or you would magically become something you weren’t. He didn’t know that what you feared more was your lungs being buried alive under fresh saltwater. He didn’t know what you’d feared most was dying all over again. 

“You are fucking crazy.”

Your words came out rushed and on the edge of a sob. You hated yourself for the sheer terror you let out, but it couldn’t be helped. All the resolve you’d built up the past few hours dissolved so easily at the mention of water. Your arms thrashed in their bindings as you moved to stand, but where would you go? You’d forgotten your ankle was still chained in place. 

The minute you moved Arlong was on you. His large hands grabbing at your shoulders and yanking you to stand on your feet. You weren’t sure if it was Kuroobi or Chew who released the shackle from your ankle but it didn’t matter. You couldn’t see past Arlong and his eyes that gleamed with a sadistic glee at whatever he had in store. 

“I’m not crazy. I’m a fishman with a vision, which you seem to lack. Allow me to help you to see your potential.” 

Of course. 

Of course, Arlong would want to use you for whatever it is you could do. Whether it was medicine or not. It didn’t matter what you said to him now. You could see looking into his eyes that he believed whatever he thought he’d seen and no amount of pleading from you would change your fate. 

“Come, little fish. It’s time for your baptism.” 

His sharp laugh cut through the silence of the room. You fruitlessly tried to make another run for it and found your feet being lifted off the ground and a sharp scream of pain sparked inside the room. Kuroobi held the rope that had been fastened between your wrist to use it to lift you up at an ungodly angle. One that forced your arms to go backwards up above your head. If Kuroobi wanted to, he could easily dislocate both shoulders from how they strained at whatever angle he tried to make them go. 

Arlong took the lead. He always did and like good little henchmen, Kuroobi and Chew quickly moved to follow. Kuroobi made sure that while he held you suspended slightly above the ground it was enough to allow your bare feet to drag across the floor. They’d taken your shoes the second time they’d come in. You’d expected them to take the shirt Nami gave you; maybe all of your clothes.

But Arlong said he was merificul and let you keep at least that. 

So, as you all made your way down the stairs and outside into Arlong Park the skin of your toes and top of your foot caught every loose rock and broken glass that laid scattered around from their partying. With each piece of glass that dragged across your foot your teeth grabbed at your bottom lip. All in a weak attempt to keep yourself from crying.

You were vaguely aware of the laughter from his men. They all seemed to find equal joy in your torture. In seeing how their captain brought the silly little humans to their knees and treated them like trash. It was something you could understand. You’d come to help them. To heal them and keep them from dying a slow and agonizing death. 

And yet…they enjoyed seeing your agony. Some of them even spit on the ground Kuroobi dragged you on. You could feel the growing need to cry growing in your chest. You’d done so good by not shedding a single tear for them, and suddenly being dragged around like useless cargo was what threatened to make you break. 

You wanted to go home. 

You wanted to see your Naan again. The desire to have her wrap you in her arms and slightly rock you as her fingers swept through your hair. The way she tucked your head under her chin and soothed you with a quiet humming tune of the nursery rhyme she sang to you since she found you. Naan would tell you to let it out. 

“There isn’t any sense in keeping it all bottled in to let it fester.”

But she also was scared of something. Whenever you got too angry - too sad - she would soothe you down the same way, but her words would change. It was never about letting it out but always about burying it deep down and trying to forget it. 

But how can you forget this, Naan? How could you forgive this?

The desperation that had begun to brew inside you was threatening to spill over. You were tired of being strong when your outcome was so uncertain. When your outcome seemed to only grow bleaker by the minute with no promise of sunshine in sight. 

Kuroobi gave a jolt that sent a fresh wave of pain through your spine and this time a small cry from that pain escaped your lips. It was so sudden you didn’t know a tear had broken free until you felt it skidding silently down your cheek. A name you were sure was Naan’s pressed to the back of your teeth and when you exhaled it released. 

“Zoro.”

His name came out in a shaky breath. A soft sob follows right behind it. It should’ve surprised you that it was his name your heart called for, but it didn’t. As much as you wanted to save yourself, a big part of you wanted him to come and save you too. Because you knew Zoro’s type of saving burned hotter than the flames of hell and consumed everything in its path leaving nothing left. 

“Where are you going with her?”

You knew that voice. You couldn’t see her. Not with your bad eye facing the direction she was coming from, but you knew it was Nami before she finally sprang into view. 

“Nami. Your friend and I are just going down to the water for a little swim.”

You felt sick. 

The panic crashed against your ribs and you didn’t know how to silence it. You didn’t know how to keep from swinging your arms in Kuroobi’s grip to try and see her. Even if it meant another blast of pain was sent to every nerve in your body. 

“She’s no use to us if she’s dead.”

Nami appeared stoic; her face empty and unmoving like her words. Or that’s what she wanted them to believe. For you to believe, but you caught the worry she tried to hide in the ice blue of her eyes. 

“I’m not going to kill her. She has information she seems keen on not sharing. I’m only going to see if she feels like talking once we get down to the ocean.”

Nami’s eyes ticked briefly in your direction. You wanted to ask her how you looked and if it was as bad as you thought. You were pretty positive you weren’t going to be winning any beauty pageants anytime soon. 

Normally, you would’ve tried to hold her gaze in a feigned act of defiance. You needed them to think she made you hate her and that you were a fool for choosing to come with her. You couldn’t hate Nami even if you tried. So, instead you turned your eyes away and looked down at the floor. It allowed her to stay in character too and pretend you were nothing more than a nuisance. 

“Make it quick,” she spit out. “A couple of the guys have been waiting for her so-called, “cure,” and are growing restless.”

At the mention of his dying crew mates, the smile of satisfaction Arlong seemed to wear like a badge frayed at the edges. The sadistic gleam in his obsidian eyes hardened to something that was impossibly more frightening. 

“Don’t worry. I’ll make sure she keeps her hands and that squishy little brain of hers.” Arlong gave Nami one last look before he signaled for Kuroobi to follow him. “Let’s make this quick.”

Kuroobi moved insync with each step Arlong took. A puppet guided by an individual string that compelled him forward with your body strung up like a yule tide duck. You couldn’t see Nami take a step forward, but you felt it. The anxiety on her face made her eyes frantically searching - thinking - of what she could do to save you. 

There was no saving you, however, and you knew this. Softly, you shook your head. Just a small shake. It was so small if you blinked you would miss it, but you knew Nami would notice. Just like she noticed almost everything else. It was all the strength you had in you to let her know to let you go.

Don’t make more of a fuss. 

That’s what you hoped your one good eye was able to plead with her. If she did, Arlong would begin to suspect she cared more about you than she’d originally let on. You couldn’t allow him another chance to wound her further than he already had. 

It was amazing how fast they moved. One minute, you were inside the Arlong Park compound and the next Kuroobi was dragging your feet through the scolding hot dirt roads. You wished this walk was as pleasant as the first. Yeah, the circumstances were the same, kind of. You were a hostage but at least, at the time, you were a hostage who got to enjoy the small things. Like the views. 

The second time around leaving the compound wasn’t how you thought it would go. Sure, the likelihood of it turning out like a novella where a knight in shining armor - or a moody green-haired swordsman - magically showed up to save the day was slime to none. It was a nice thought. As nice as thinking Arlong was magically going to grow a conscience and let you and Nami skip away out the front door. 

While your current predicament wasn’t what you wanted, you still at least got to take in all the striking orange of the tangerines that were scattered for miles. It was when the grove finally came to a stop and the trees turned wild and large that you knew you were close. 

You tried to prepare yourself and to let yourself believe maybe there was a way you could magically get out of this. But you knew your fate was sealed the minute the crash of blue broke over the treelines. All the resolve of bravery you tried to build up in the wonderland in your head came crashing back into reality. 

Suddenly, you were counting each sinking step of Kuroobi’s feet as they moved across the sand. The way the waves grew closer and the seagulls called out your impending doom. It wasn’t until you were mere feet from the wet sand that a sharp cry of, “No!” burst free from between your lips. Not caring about the eruption of pain that came when you tried to wiggle yourself free from Kuroobi’s strong grip. 

“There is no point in trying to get away. You sealed your fate the minute you decided to lie.”

“I haven’t lied to you, you fucking lunatic!”

You knew it wasn’t smart to answer him that way. It probably wouldn’t be smart to do it in any normal circumstance either, but you were past trying to stay pleasant. You had a strong feeling it wouldn’t matter if you kissed his ass and promised to pluck every rainbow out of the sky for him, you would still be where you are now. 

On your knees in wet sand inches away from the entrance to the ocean. 

“I know what I saw!” Arlong’s voice roared as he stalked over to you. A hand grabbing at your hair and using it to anchor you up to look at him. “You can call me crazy all you want but you human’s have always lied to our faces. You made empty promises that rang as hollow as the bullets you placed in our backs.”

“I get it,” you seethed through your teeth. “They were mean to you. Boo hoo! It doesn’t mean that all humans are like that.”

“You are all the same! Every last one of you is full of lies and you!? You are harboring something, girl, and I will find out what it is. Even if it means I have to bleed it out of you.”

“You believe what you want, but I know who I am.”

“Is that so?” 

You hated it when Arlong smiled like this. Like he knew a secret you didn’t and the information was only meant to benefit him and no one else. 

“If you believed that, there wouldn’t be so much fear in your eyes. Allow me to drown out all those unnecessary thoughts for you.”

Arlong moved quickly to grab you by your arms and drag you towards the waters edge. Your feet struggled to stand up to move with him; to bury themselves deep into the sand and attempt to put up some sort of fight. 

It was a losing battle and no matter how much you screamed and tried to turn your body out of his hold, you felt the first shock of cold against your skin. You knew once Arlong was in the water it would only be a matter of seconds for him to take you out. Fishmen were known for being faster than sound once they entered the water. You had no chance of fighting back as Arlong’s moved inside the water. His hand on your arm keeping your head below the water and secured in place so the waves couldn’t take you. 

The water filtered through your nose in seconds. The burning of saltwater in the back of your throat teleported you back to being that same terrified little girl. 

All I wanted was to play…

That time you had your hands and your nails to scratch and claw up at Coben’s face. You weren’t afforded that same luxury this time. You were quickly reminded that your arms and hands were hog tied behind your back. Your shoulders shaking violently to try and break free as your mouth finally opened, your lungs screaming for air, only to be greeted instantly by the suffocating rush of water. 

Arlong found a perfect spot that left you feet away from the edge of the shore. You knew he found the perfect spot because that was when his hand released your arm and was replaced by his large foot. He pushed you down and down until your back touched sand and even further until you could feel the sand digging into the still fresh wound of the brand on your back. 

The flare of pain caused you to scream. Your eyes watching as the last bit of air you had bubbled up to the surface. The only thing left for you to inhale was the saltwater of the ocean, and Mother Ocean was merciless in the way she wrapped her fingers inside their tissue and squeezed. 

You knew it was pointless to try and wiggle yourself loose. It just wasn’t going to happen with his foot keeping you trapped to the ocean floor. Just as fast as Arlong had placed you under he suddenly pulled you back up. When your face broke the surface you tried to take in a greedy breath, but instead your lungs vomited up the water it had consumed. 

“Do you feel ready to spill your guts, girl? Or should I let you marinate longer?”

You tried to talk around your coughing, but your throat was full of burning from your lungs.

“Ah, marinating it is then.”

A strangled shout was all you were able to get out before Arlong launched you back under. This time, however, Arlong leaned over to let his upper body dip under the water's surface. His smiling face following you down to the grave he wished to bury you in just to watch your body thrash uselessly under his foot. His smile growing wider with each hiccup your body involuntarily took in a reflex to get air. 

It felt like the water filled your lungs faster this time and that same weightless feeling you’d felt with Coben’s hands around your throat returned. This time, however, you knew there wouldn’t be a Usopp to come and save you. No one was going to save you and the weight of loneliness that thought had was enough to make you feel a different kind of pain. 

The edges of your vision were beginning to grow black and it was a welcome sight. Maybe death wouldn’t be such a bad thing if it meant this nightmare was over. Maybe in death you could find the peace you’d been denied by the living. A weightlessness began to take over your body and you found your willingness to follow the darkness terrifying, but you were tired. You couldn’t take this anymore. You couldn’t- 

Suddenly, Arlong launched you back out of the water. His large hand held you steady as your throat coughed up every last inch of water.

“Don’t go dying on me now!” He chortled. “We were just getting started.”

You were too weak to tell him where he could shove it. Your eyes were barely able to focus over the spots that filtered over your vision. Maybe that would explain why you thought the little girl hiding among the trees was a hallucination. Hallucination or not, you wanted to tell her to run. This scene was not one meant to be seen by a child, but before you could call out to her Arlong shoved you back under and everything started all over again.

You’d thrown up sometime ago in the sand. 

The only comforting part about it was that it was mostly water. The second comforting thing? Arlong, Kuroobi, and Chew seemed to have left you here. 

Oh, you were sure they would be back. There wasn’t anyway that Arlong was just going to let you go. You were part of his crew, after all. For now, you would enjoy what little moment of reprieve you got as you tried to collect yourself here on this beach. 

The beach where you died more than a handful of times. 

Every time you felt yourself begin to fade - when the darkness was more than happy to wrap its arms around you - was always when Arlong pulled you back. A part of you wondered if he knew. A shark smelling blood in the water and this blood was that of your wish for him just to let death take you. 

Dying had to be easier than this, but you couldn’t die. Not when you were waiting to see him again.

It wasn’t until they’d placed a rock on your chest to weigh you down that you felt something change. Something  dark was clawing its way feverishly to the surface. All the gut wrenching fear that Arlong built with each fresh surge of drowning twisted like a gnarled root to take shape into something sinister. The shape it created felt ravenous - eager to show him his own brand of fear with gnashing teeth and twisted bones. 

You were too far gone in your own despair for you to remember all of Naan’s warnings. The reminders that the darkness was never a giver, but a taker. As you watched a smokey trundle of blood weave its way from your body you knew you no longer cared. You had no room for it when your head felt ready to burst from pressure, your lungs like a fish tank, and sternum cracking with each breath from the weight of the stone. 

That’s when the sickeningly sweet whispers started again and, this time, you listened. The words they spoke grew like venom on your tongue. The whispers told you if you spoke their words out loud, Arlong’s smile would disappear. You could make him know what it felt like to be afraid. 

Arlong must have noticed something in you had changed because all the playful glee he’d shown while he watched your misery evaporated. For a split second, uncertainty flashed across his eyes and it was all you needed to know if you chased it, you could make him give in to fear. 

You never got a chance to see what would happen. If you could make him turn inside out. Just like before, they’d silenced you before you could complete whatever you’d started. Deep down, you were glad. Even though for a brief moment you no longer felt any pain - felt powerful - that wickedness had left a stain on your soul that you couldn’t get clean.

You refused to cry as you tried to get comfortable. You weren’t sure how that was supposed to even be possible, but you had to try. Realistically, you didn’t have the strength to get up and try and make a run for it. Even if you did, what would that mean for Nami? Where would you even go?

No. 

As hopeless as you felt - as everything felt - you weren’t going to run. 

You were trying to shuffle to your other side but gave up when you tipped over to your back. Your throat was raw like the muscle and chords you’d used had been removed, and your lungs felt worse. Truthfully, your whole body felt like shit, and it felt like too much work to try and do anything else than lie there like a sack of potatoes. 

You were about to look back up to the sky when you saw her. 

A dart of lilac hair attached to the same little girl you’d spotted earlier. The one you wished you could yell at to disappear. Tell her that this was no place for a child. You thought you’d imagined her, but as she made her way out from behind the safety of the trees and across the beach, you realized she was very much real. 

She’d only looked over her shoulders - left and right - twice. Both of those times told her that it was safe to make a journey over to you and you wanted to yell at her. To tell her she was being foolish and at any minute Arlong could return. It was horror novel worthy the way she recklessly trekked across the beach to an absolute stranger. No care for the possible danger that could spring up at any minute. The thought of what he would do if he did find her constricted your heart in a new form of terror. It was enough to get you to croak out a few words - pain be damned. 

“G-go…go ba-ck.”

The girl stopped for a brief moment and it was enough to give you hope that she was going to listen. You should’ve known better. When did any kid in the history of ever listen? Your words halted her movement for all of a second before she started forward again. This time her small legs picking up speed as she ran towards you. Once she reached your side she quickly dropped down to her knees. 

A tiny tote was over her shoulder and you watched as she opened it to reach inside and produce a tangerine. She held it up just to show you it was, indeed, a tangerine and went to peeling it open.

“I couldn’t find any clean water.” Gods, her voice sounded so innocent. So small. “But I remembered tangerines are juicy, and my daddy said our island has the juiciest tangerines. Maybe they have the power to make you feel better.”

You watched her work the peel off and stash the remains of it back inside the tote. The evidence of her kindness never reaching the sandy beach to give away that she was ever there in the first place. It was smart. You were torn out of your thoughts when he tiny hand pressed a piece of tangerine against your lips. 

“You should hurry and eat it before they come back. My daddy tells me the tangerines from our grove are special. They can make you strong enough to keep fighting.”

“Is there anything your daddy doesn’t claim these tangerines can do?” 

You mumbled before gently pulling the slice of tangerine into your mouth. Gods, this tasted like heaven. It was a fight to keep from letting out a moan of gratitude as the sweet citrus flavor washed over your tongue. 

All of that was replaced when you noticed your words caused a sudden shift in her demeanor. A wave of sadness consumed her. Her eyes darted down to the tangerine in her hand as she focused on peeling another slice free from its core.

“No. But…I know they don’t heal sick people. If they did, daddy wouldn’t be sick anymore.”

You couldn’t stop staring at her. This little girl with hair as vibrant as a wisteria and startling eyes that were bluer than the ocean. Those same eyes that conveyed her kindness held a deep sadness. One you knew all too well when a child watched someone they love slowly begin to die. 

She peeled another piece off and brought it back to your mouth, patiently waiting for you to open up just enough so she could tip the tangerine inside. 

“You shouldn’t be here,” you spoke after you struggled to swallow the second tangerine. “It isn’t safe for you.”

“I know but….” She stopped mid sentence to take a cautionary look around before she continued. “I heard that fishman say you were a doctor.”

Ah, now you understood why she was willing to brave the wrath of Arlong just to come speak to you. She was willing to risk it all to make sure her father was going to be okay. 

You felt a small smile lift the good side of your face as you replied, “I am indeed a doctor.”

“Do you think you could come and look at my daddy? I can try and find some money to pay you. Please.”

“I would love to come by and see if I could help your dad, sweetie, but I’m currently…tied up.”

The brief flash of excitement that lit up her eyes died out in a smoke of disappointment. The next piece of tangerine she’d peeled sat inside her palm while she seemed to struggle with that new information. 

“Oh.”

Why did you feel like you’d crushed what was left of her hopes and dreams? She wouldn't look up at you now. Her fingers picking at the veins on the tangerine and when she sniffled you felt like you died. 

No, no do not cry! 

Your mind raced in what you could do to help make her feel better. What could you do with your arms tied behind you back and looking like…well, whatever Arlong made you look like. The only thing you could think of was something impossible, but if you could find a way to do it, you would help her father. 

“How about this? Whenever I get out of here I’ll come and find you-“

“In Coco Village?!”

The excited determination was back and it burned hotter than ever. Her small hand shoved the piece inside your mouth and you did your best to try and chew it before you choked. That was the last thing you needed. Death by tangerine. 

“Sure. If that’s where you and your dad are.”

“Oh my gosh mama is going to be so excited! And happy! Daddy’s been sick for a long time.”

She placed another piece inside your mouth and you quickly chewed it up. It was easy to ignore the sting the citrus caused your throat as you worried what would become of her if she stayed. After you finished the third bite, you offered up your name in greeting and were easily rewarded with hers in return. 

“Nazifa.”

You smiled at her softly and prayed it didn’t look scary. You weren’t exactly sure how you looked, but you were willing to bet after your latest adventure with Arlong you looked worse than before. If that was at all possible.

“Nazifa. That is a pretty name. What are you doing all the way out here?”

It appeared agreeing to come see her father significantly lifted the girl’s spirit. She was mimicking a hoping motion with her shoulders as she peeled another piece free and, without thinking, popped it into her own mouth. You couldn’t keep the smile from growing on your face. 

“I was looking for something to help my daddy. He’s been sick a long time.” 

“What were you looking for exactly?”

“Plants, silly!”

You wondered if now was the time to try and teach her the danger of ingesting just any plants but thought against it. Now really wasn’t the time to give a botany lesson lying on a beach looking like a crazy lady. 

“Of course.”

“But then I heard the bad man say you were a doctor and I thought maybe you could help my daddy.”

Nazifa leaned forward and placed another tangerine piece at your lips. You opened your mouth and eagerly ate what was offered. When was the last time you’d eaten? You’d been here with Nami for three days and you were sure you’d been offered nothing. Not that you could eat or drink in your current…predicament. 

“I promise I will help your daddy if I can, Nazifa.”

All the earlier happiness Nazifa showed seemed to erase in a second. The endless expanse of her blue eyes were solely focused on you; searching your face to see if there were any signs of dishonesty.

“You promise?”

Looking at her now you knew this was beyond important to her. This dealt with someone she loved beyond all reason. What little girl would willingly risk being caught to come talk to a hostage just because they heard the word doctor? Kids like Nazifa would. When all hope seemed lost as they watched the person they loved most slowly die in front of them. 

Without giving it much thought you felt yourself replying, “I promise, promise.” 

You meant it. 

This was one of the reasons you’d become a doctor. All those hours training under Naan - tirelessly watching the way she mended wounds and broken spirits. You weren’t sure exactly what her father had, no way to know until you saw him, but that was your goal. In the presence of this little girl, she reminded you why you needed to keep fighting.

You were going to get out of here. You were going to go to Coco Village and see Nazifa’s father and do what you could to heal him, because that’s who you were, and you would be damned if you ever let Arlong take that away from you. 

The sound of his name startled him awake.

Zoro knew it wasn’t just any voice he’d heard. No one else’s voice could make him rise from his hammock faster than you. The imaginary sound of you calling his name, laced with a frightful plea, worked its way inside his body like a haunting. There wasn’t any possible way that he could’ve heard you. There were still miles of sea laid out before him before they ever reached you and Nami. 

So, why did it feel as if a sickness was brewing in his gut? 

He swung his legs out from the hammock and scrubbed a harsh hand over his face. Zoro had gone to his room in the hopes of finding some sanctuary in the form of rest. No matter how many times he closed his eyes, his head was swamped with visions of you. A thousand scenarios played out of what could possibly be happening while you weren’t beside him. Zoro wanted to believe that every scenario didn’t play out in cruel ways that left him ready to split men in two; to remind him why he was given the nickname The Demon. 

But that one word - his name - felt too real. 

Come and find me, Pirate Hunter, Roronoa Zoro.

Zoro knew he would do just that. It wasn’t a matter of whether he wanted to anymore, but of need. He wasn’t sure what he would do the minute he saw you. If he would just grab you, throw you over his shoulder, and carry your ass back to the Merry. His body practically begged to feel your fists beating against the muscles of his back. Your legs would kick aimlessly in hopes he would set you down with you slinging fun comments like asking if he was a caveman. 

It was funny. It used to irritate him when you would call him an asshole, but now? Now he would give anything to hear you say it again. For him to have the chance to make the playfulness in your tune catch and turn into something breathy. 

Yeah. He wasn’t going to be getting any rest anytime soon.

With a sigh of defeat, he reached back into the hammock and pulled the Wado free from where it had been placed next to him. Zoro moved swiftly to his feet and slid the sheath home inside his belt, which felt painfully empty. It was something he was going to have to remedy and fast. That could wait until after he did as he was told and saved you from your own stupidity. 

He made his way out of his room and out towards the bridge of the Merry. Zoro was looking for Luffy and found himself walking up to the stern where an all too familiar annoying voice made his presence known. 

“What was that? Why don’t you say it to my face? Hey! Morning, Champ.”

Not only did Nami and you leave, but you were both replaced by Zoro’s worst fucking nightmares. A waiter and a clown. 

Zoro didn’t mean to round the corner so fast. He wasn’t in the mood to deal with Buggy anymore than Usopp seemed to enjoy his directional company. But here he was: being called out by the clown and Zoro was never one to back down from a fight. 

“I know Luffy made a deal with you to find Arlong, clown, but if this is another one of your tricks-”

“What are you going to do? Bleed on me? Tell me that I don’t mean anything to you, either, to hurt my sensitive feelings? Hey, speaking of not having any feelings, Zoro, buddy, since you don’t seem to want Doc, can I have a go at her? Seems only fair- OW!”

He hadn’t realized he’d lurched forward until his fingers dug into the bandana to the root of the hair below. Zoro made sure all the practiced years of grip training honed in on the clowns skull - a millisecond of a thought away from crushing it in his hand. Buggy must have noticed the threat from the predicament that he found himself in. Sure, Zoro could crush Buggy’s head in but he could also simply toss his ass out over the boat. One problem gone with it just leaving the waiter to deal with after. 

Yeah, Zoro kinda liked those odds.

He made his way back down the steps to the stern of the ship. The pleading of Buggy made his ears ring in annoyance.

“Whoa! Whoa! Wait. Whoa! What? Because I said bleed on me? You can bleed on me if you want. I mean, a deal’s a deal, all right? You want your girl back and the map. I want my body.”

Zoro flung Buggy’s head over the side of the ship and a burst of pleasure rushed through him as he watched his neck frantically begin to shake. He was well aware it was a petty move, but right now, petty felt fucking good. 

“How do we know you’re not leading us to a trap?”

“Zoro, buddy! Honor amongst pirates. Right? Come on. How about I sing a nice sea shanty to pass the time.”

The minute Zoro heard Buggy take a sharp inhale to start doing exactly that he backed away from the railing. He wasn’t in any mood to carry on this particular part of the conversation. 

“🎶Oh, there once was a girl with tangerine hair. Stole my map and left me stranded somewhere.” Zoro made quick work of the steps and to his pleasant surprise watched Usopp move towards the barrel he’d removed him from seconds before. “Truly a crafty and crooked young lass but you can’t deny she had a spectacular–🎶” Usopp pulled the lid off the barrel and Zoro didn’t hesitate to immediately drop Buggy inside. “OW! Right on my nose!”

So far this was the most enjoyable thing to his morning. As fast as Usopp pulled open the lid, with the same speed he closed it completely silencing the clown inside. The silence was instant and it was phenomenal. However, a part of him felt like he had a missed opportunity of true euphoria launching him out to sea. 

“Thank god for you, man,” Usopp huffed out with relief. “If I had to listen to him for another hour or so I was going to lose it.”

Zoro didn’t know how to reply. He just stood there and gave a small nod in welcome as his hands rested on the top of the Wado’s hilt. It wasn’t lost on him that Usopp mentioned it was only another hour. Was it really another hour before he heard someone calling out, “Land hoe!” Bringing him one step closer to finding you. 

He was going to have to inform you this was the worst game of hide and seek he’d ever played. Zoro watched Usopp head back to the helm of the ship. His hands wrapped around the steering wheel as he looked out over the ocean. His eyes were no doubt scanning for the one thing Zoro himself was equally impatiently waiting for. 

Zoro knew he was giving off awkward. He was still just standing there. Not saying a word. He was trying to think of how to ask his question without sounding desperate, but he knew once the question left his lips Usopp would automatically know why he was asking anyway. 

“So, you think we only have an hour left? Two at the most?”

Usopp glanced away from scanning the horizon to regard him before looking away. 

“You mean before we see the Conomi Islands or before we get to her?”

This time Usopp’s eyes landed on him and they didn’t tear themselves away. Not yet. Zoro was beginning to realize that he wasn’t the only person on this ship with a deeply rooted need to make sure you were safe. The years of embedded friendship were exposed all over Usopp’s face. Years that Zoro himself knew he could never replace, but only hoped to make memories of his own that were as fierce as the protective glean that shot through Usopp’s eyes. 

It was Zoro who broke first for once. His eyes moved back to the safety of the expansive blue ocean in front of them. 

“Both.”

His answer felt like a betrayal. He knew they needed to spot the island cresting over the horizon first. That had to be first because it’s not like he could magically teleport himself to you, but he couldn’t stop hating the weight of waiting. 

A heavy sigh tore him out of his thoughts and back over to Usopp. He wasn’t looking back at him anymore. Usopp’s eyes were now looking out where Zoro had run for shelter. Except, it seemed Usopp did it for a completely different reason. 

“Shit.” Whatever he was about to do, Zoro could feel the terror coming off him. “Look, Zoro-”

Those two words told him this was not a conversation he was hoping to be a part of. 

“I’m not sure exactly what it is that is going on with you and Doc but-”

“But?”

Usopp’s head shot over to him and he looked ready to shit himself. It took what little self-control Zoro had not to smirk at the obvious terror his one-word question caused him. It took Usopp a couple of tries to swallow past the lump that’d grown in his throat before he continued.

“I know she likes you and I seen what liking you did to her after you went and fought Mihawk. I don’t want to ever see her like that again, Zoro. Doc is family to me. You understand that? Whatever you intend to do when you see her -  make sure you make it right.”

Make it right. 

That was the one thing Zoro was struggling to figure out how to do exactly. Sure, he had a letter you’d left with strict instructions on how to do just that, but it would be a cold day in hell before he groveled. Roronoa Zoro didn’t grovel. 

He didn’t know how to respond to Usopp and, because of that, instead of trying he turned and headed towards the front of the Merry. If Luffy hadn’t been back here with Usopp, that meant he had to be either in the kitchen or the front. Maybe he’d find him riding on the ram’s head, which was his favorite place on the ship. Zoro could easily check the galley first, but if he could have fewer run-ins with the waiter the better.

The world must have been against him today. 

He could hear Luffy saying he wanted to make sure Nami was okay and a small part of Zoro did too. He hated to admit it, but Nami had become a friend to him in ways he hadn’t expected. Sure, Zoro knew he could chop it up to the times they’d been in danger because there was nothing like building a bond with someone when your backs were pressed together fighting against a common enemy.

And while he did worry about her he was more interested in answers than a sob story. He may have been wrong back at the Baratie when they’d been caught in a guessing game of, “Guess my trauma,” but Zoro hadn’t been wrong about Nami carrying a load large enough to crush her spirit. It was something that must have happened gradually. So gradual, that by the time she realized the baggage she’d placed on her shoulders it only dampened who she truly was. 

Zoro wanted to believe that when he rounded the corner he would find Luffy just talking to himself. It was a dumb hope, but the last person Zoro wanted to see when he rounded the corner was to be greeted with the most unwelcome sight of the waiter giving Luffy first mate advice. 

“A beautiful, talented woman does not choose to ally herself with a pirate like Arlong. Nami clearly needs to be rescued.”

Of course the waiter would say some shit like that. He’d practically swooned over her the minute he’d locked eyes with Nami at Baratie.

“Her tattoo says different.”

Zoro hoped those four words conveyed what he thought of him: an idiot. 

“Yeah, well, tattoos don’t tell the whole story. And like any woman, she’s a mystery to be unraveled.”

The tone of Sanji’s response told Zoro plainly what Sanji thought of him. An idiot. 

“Nami made her choice.”

“You don’t know why.”

“The only thing I want to hear from you are dinner specials. You don’t know Nami.” 

“Sounds like you don’t know her either, Mosshead.”

“I’m sure Nami has her reasons.”

Zoro sniffed hard to keep from hurling his next words at Sanji. His eyes turned towards the open water because if he had to see the look on Sanji’s face one more time he couldn’t trust what he was going to say or do. The guy had been here all of a few days and suddenly he was a Nami expert. 

“And I know Doc has her reasons for choosing to do what she did. I just need to hear from them myself.”

You’d made your choice to save Luffy. Maybe in your mind you thought you were saving Nami too, but Zoro knew better than most that sometimes some people couldn’t be saved. 

“Land hoe!”

All it took was those two words to send Zoro’s adrenaline into overdrive. Land. He turned from the side of the ship to face forward and, sure enough, on the edge of the horizon was the first sight of land. 

The Conomi Islands. 

He was just a few miles away from being closer to you, and Zoro promised himself that this time he wasn’t going to let you go. 

After Nazifa left and Arlong and his merry gang returned, you’d ended up staying a little while longer on that beach than you originally wanted. Just a while longer with your belly filling up with sea water until your nose began to bleed and the sun disappeared behind the wall of mountains. 

It wasn’t a surprise you’d been too exhausted to walk anywhere. That’s how you ended with your dead weight slung over Kuroobi’s shoulder and brought back to Arlong Park. He hadn’t even tried to make you walk. 

Kuroobi dumped you back inside Nami’s room. Your room now. He made sure that before he left he locked the shackle back in place. A reminder that you weren’t going to be leaving this room on your own. You were left soaked, dirty, and blooded on the floor waiting for the next day to come. 

You could handle the bruises and the sores. You could even handle the shackle on your ankle. What you couldn’t handle was the cold. The island was warm enough during the day, but at night the island turned into a different season. The cold stone that layered the room only helped to seal in the dampness making the night feel like an eternity. 

You weren’t able to get any rest and because of that, when Nami came sauntering in you thought you were hallucinating. It wasn’t until she threw a pair of clothes in your direction that you realized you couldn’t be hallucinating an outfit like that. 

“Don’t you own any long sleeves,” you groaned. 

“I could just take them back and leave you to sit in soaked clothes.”

It took your body a moment to peel itself from the spot on the floor. Your hands pushed an aching body up off the floor that felt ready to crack at the slightest movement until you were at least in a sitting position. You regarded Nami before looking at the nice and dry clothes she’d thrown in front of you. 

“You are right. Dry clothes are better than wet ones any day.”

A soft smile curled her lips that helped soften the stance she’d taken on. Her arms were back to being guarded across her chest while her shoulder rested against one of the many pillars that held up the room. There was no way of knowing what she was thinking as she regarded you. Whatever it was, however, you were willing to bet not one bit of it was good. 

The small amount of mirth that smile awarded you in brightening up her face quickly dimmed to a shadow when you stood up. Your hands quickly worked the damp clothes off your body and into the ones she’d brought you. While you weren’t happy about being in another questionable top, you were happily surprised to find that she’d brought you cargo pants. 

“Since you brought me cargo pants all can be forgiven about the shirt.” 

“I seriously question our friendship with your weird love for cargo pants.”

“They are literally fashion’s utility pants.”

“Okay, Doc, no one should say that with a straight face and mean it.”

You wanted to tell her she was just hating on the amount of pockets that could be found on these bad boys. You hadn’t really learned to love them until you’d forgotten your satchel one day when you went forging with Naan. She’d chastised you relentlessly for being so foolish. 

“Your head is always up in the clouds where it shouldn’t be.” 

That was her favorite assumption. Your head was always everywhere but where Naan wanted it to be, which usually meant reality. Naan could complain all she wanted, however, you’d realize the nifty extra pockets scattered around your legs proved to be a great place to stick mushrooms and truffles. 

You’d successfully got them on and turned to let Nami know exactly what you thought of her and her distaste for efficiency, but felt the playful words become an afterthought once you saw her. You were positive she wasn’t going to cry. Not in this place. Whatever Arlong Park was to you, you knew it paled in comparison to her experience. 

While you’d had the pleasure of Arlong’s hospitality for almost a full week, Nami’s was longer. Surely, it had to be more than a few years worth of being subjected to hardening herself against whoever Arlong wanted her to be. You were willing to bet that the couple weeks she’d spent with all of you was the first time Nami got to enjoy finding out who she really was outside of whatever trauma she’d endured. The shackle attached to your ankle was a great reminder it belonged to Nami first. 

“What’s wrong?”

A soft scoff left her as her shoulder pushed away from the pillar. She began to walk the circle of the room while her feet kicked at the dirt floor. 

“Do you really have to ask?”

“Nami-“

“Don’t. Don’t try and tell me that this isn’t my fault.”

You felt your brow knit together at her words. You wanted to go to her but the sound of the chain scraping against the stone floor was a painful reminder you only had so many feet spared to you. Unfortunately, Nami resided over where you couldn’t reach her: her own private island of regret. 

“Nami, how in the hell do you consider any of this your fault?”

“Doc, have you seen yourself? If Luffy, Usopp, or jesus, Zoro saw what you looked like…”

This time you did take a step forward. You moved until you were at the first step and the shackled pulled violently against your momentum. 

“I know I’m not going to win any beauty contests right now,” you informed her, cutting her off. “But it’s like you said, you didn’t make me come, Nami. I came here on my own free will, and if I had to make the choice again I would still do it.”

“How can you say that after what they did to you yesterday?” 

“Yeah, yesterday did suck.” You couldn’t deny that. “It sucked a shit ton. I still wouldn’t change my decision to come to save Luffy. To save you.” 

You knew there was a chance saying that last part was going to drastically change her mood. You watched that very thing happen at lightning speed. One minute Nami appeared ready to repent for every bad thing she, and the world, had ever done and the next, a hardness resonated through her, stiffening her shoulders and rearing back her head like she was ready to spit venom. 

“I never asked you to come here for me and I don’t need saving.”

“Again, this creepy ass chain and shackle thing says otherwise.” In case she wasn’t familiar with what you meant, you made sure to point down to your latest accessory. “I’m your friend, Nami and nothing is ever going to change that.”

Nami shook her head and turned to face the door. You weren’t sure if she was going to look back at you or completely leave the room. The tension in her shoulders gave the impression she was ready to bolt. Another heavy sigh came from her and her arms released from their place across her chest. 

“I’ve been asked to take you out to get the ingredients for you to start making that antidote you promised Arlong. He said it’s about time you deliver.”

Arlong was lucky you needed to find ingredients to make some different tonics for Nazifa’s dad. You weren’t sure what he was sick with or if he could even be healed, but the most you could do is make something to make whatever it was just a little more bearable. 

“Are you going to have to walk me like a dog on a leash?”

If Nami could roll her eyes any harder they would’ve gone completely white. 

“Stop being so dramatic. You get to walk leash free.”

Nami walked down the couple of steps and bent down by your ankle. She produced a row of keys from her pocket and you couldn’t help but let out a “Thank god,” when she stuck the key in the lock and released its hold from your ankle. 

“Is that why you brought me cargo pants?”

Nami looked about as confused as you’d imagine someone would be when they had absolutely no damn clue what you were talking about. 

“Why would that be the reason I brought you ugly ass pants?”

“They are not ugly,” you reprimanded her. “They serve a purpose.”

“Purpose or not they literally do nothing for your ass.”

“Nami, I’m not changing and I don’t have a satchel. Arlong ripped it apart the other day when he destroyed what I’d brought from the Merry.”

Nami held up a finger indicating for you to wait before she flipped open her satchel. In a matter of seconds she produced a much smaller charcoal leather satchel and handed it to you. You cautiously took it while you flipped it over in your hands taking notice of the oddly placed straps and-

“It’s a thigh satchel.”

Nami must have taken note of your apparent confusion and thankfully told you before you embarrassed yourself by trying to put it on over your shoulders. 

“Oh. Cool.” You waited a breath before asking, “Why couldn’t you just get me a regular satchel?”

“I had to find something to offset the tragedy that is that outfit you’re wearing.”

“Oh yeah!” 

You fake laughed and Nami wasted no time in walking towards the exit. If the pep in her step was any indication, Nami was extremely pleased with herself. She wasn’t waiting for you to catch up and it forced you to rush out after her. A grumble of, “You got jokes,” humming past your lips as you took up step beside her. 

You weren’t sure how long Nami and you forged across the island, but you knew, no matter how long it’d been, it was the most free you’d felt in days. The beauty of it? You’d be able to find ingredients for the fish rot and plenty of others to make for Nazifa’s father. You knew that information wasn’t something Nami would run and tell Arlong about but, just on the safe side, you kept it to yourself. 

It felt good to be outside. Away from Arlong and Kuroobi and every other asshole who had made it their personal mission to see you miserable. Since you’d come to the Conomi Islands you didn’t get a chance to enjoy it past your first initial moment walking through the tangerine groves and the cautious gaze of villagers. 

You weren’t taking for granted the easy way your shoulders relaxed in Nami’s company. The way the breeze rolled through the groves and left the heavy handed scent of citrus in the air. You hadn’t noticed it before - how the air seemed to forever be stamped with the scent. Then again, you hadn’t been in the best place to really take it all in either. 

While you’d walked through grove after grove and into the forest beyond, you ran your hands against the coarse bark of the trees. Your fingers digging into the grooves that told the decades of growth that housed thousands of stories. You memorized the formation of vegetation and the different flowers that peaked beneath the sides of bushes or grew wrapped around huts like ivy. You wished you had more time to study some of them. To draw them inside your notebook and make small observations about the patterns of the soil they grew in and their roots. 

Every place you walked there were more mysteries for your brain to unravel, and it all came with their fresh crushing realization you wouldn’t be able to enjoy any of it. It wasn’t until you came to a grove surrounded by willow trees and hydrangeas with hues in lilac and blue-violet that your feet grew rooted to the spot. It wasn’t exactly like Irkhaven but it felt eerily close to it. You expected to turn and find Zoro standing at the entrance of the willows branches. A fresh flower plucked between his fingers and waiting to place it somewhere in your hair. 

The ache of never seeing him again felt worse than death.

It pained you when Nami informed you it was time to head back. It was the first time you considered running. To promise the devil anything he wanted to allow you to stay outside in the safety of the grove for just a little while longer.

When you got back to Arlong Park you were told you needed to start mixing up the medicine asap. Arlong already had a line of fishmen waiting for you to take care of and mend. It wasn’t something you minded, since it gave you access to open flames and mortars. Everything you told him you needed, Arlong made sure was there waiting for you when you and Nami returned. It made it all the easier to make other things along with the antidote for the fish rot. 

While you worked a part of you was overcome with the urge to alter what you made. It would be easy. You’d come across loads of fly agaric grouped together at the base of a tree trunk. Usually, you never would’ve picked up such an ingredient, but ever since you’d opened yourself up to the darkness you couldn’t get rid of the whispers. 

Evil wormed its way inside your mind like arsenic - poisoning every thought into something putrid. Naan warned you - chastised you - to keep away from the whispers and their sweet words. She’d asked you to swear to her you would never let it in. 

You wondered if she would forgive you for not being able to keep your word. 

Now, at times like now, as you ground up ingredients and placed it inside the beaker to boil something dark demanded you add it. Twist the organs of the men until they rot from the inside out. The more you tried to ignore the whispers, the stronger they seemed to get until they practically screamed; rattling around all your thoughts. 

So, when Nami told you that you were going with her to Coco Village you welcomed the distraction. Plus, it meant you would get to help Nazifa and, just maybe, helping her father would be enough to heal yourself. 

“You sure do like picking berries and grass don’t you?” Nami teased. 

Her words cut through your current thoughts as you tried to gently tug the last of the moss from the trunk of the tree.

“This is not just grass. It’s moss, and this specific strain is a great homeopathic to stimulate healing,” you informed her. “Also - where are these berries you speak of because I am starving.” 

Before Nami could turn away you easily caught the rise of her lips as her booted feet kicked at the ground. You wish she wouldn’t have tried to hide her smile. It would’ve been the first nice thing to see all day and the least moodiest look from Nami specifically since you’d left Arlong Park a second time. You weren’t a hundred percent sure what was said between her and Arlong, or why exactly she didn’t seem thrilled to go to this village, but Nami acted like she would rather be set on fire than go.

“Sorry, no berries here. Just an abundance of tangerines, though.” 

“Berries or tangerines: I will gladly eat both.”

Gods, did you mean it. You’d been without food since the few tangerines Nazifa fed you and the bread and water Nami snuck in just after you’d come back from your earlier expedition. You glanced over at your friend and found her deep in thought. You were getting ready to ask her if you could give her a couple berry for her thoughts when she spoke. 

“I’m glad he didn’t take that from you.”

“Take what?”

“Your love for what you do. Foraging and just…helping people.” 

“Arlong won’t win if that’s his goal. These hands were born to be knuckle deep in some earthworm's home.” By the way Nami stared at you, it begged the question: “Too much?”

Nami's response came in her shaking her head causing laughter to spill out with each flick. It was one of the best sounds you’d heard all day. You wish it would’ve stayed longer, but when you came to a wooden fence line, an obvious entrance to a village, all the happiness she’d shown evaporated in seconds.

“We’re here.”

“What exactly are we here to do?” 

Nami sighed out her reply. 

“We’re here to collect the villager’s tribute payment.” 

“Oh. Yeah, this doesn’t sound like it’s going to be a good time.”

“It’s not.”

The both of you barely crested the entrance to the village and were greeted by the sight of what looked like most of the villagers in the square. The constable stood facing everyone with a leather box in his hands open and waiting for the next set of villagers to empty out their life savings inside. 

Yeah. This was definitely not a good time for anyone involved. 

Your eyes scanned the crowd for a hint of a tiny figure somewhere among the downcast adults. You were about to give up when you heard a familiar voice shout your name. You were still looking for Nazifa when her tiny body came barreling into you from the left. Her arms wrapped tightly at your waist in a hug full of gratitude. 

“They let you out! And you came!”

“I made you a promise, didn’t I?”

It felt like you had to pry her arms off to get her to look at you. Her tiny body gave an excited jump before she launched herself back against you. Her arms wrapped around you and this time it felt just a little tighter.  You gave her a brief hug of your own in hopes it would get her to release you. 

“Are you making friends without me?” 

You glanced over at Nami beside you. Her eyes were wide with questions as they glanced from you and darted down to point at Nazifa. You offered her a shrug in reply that earned you a hard stare. 

“She fed me tangerines when Arlong left me out on the beach.”

Nami took a cautious step towards you to fill in what remaining space was left between you. The movement caused Nazifa to tighten her arms closer at your waist and your arms instinctively enclosed around her. The movement wasn’t lost on Nami but she didn’t let it keep her from leaning in to ask, “Doc, what are you doing.” 

“Her dad is sick, Nami.”

“And? What does that have to do with you?”

“I promised I would come and see him. Give them medicine to try and help him, if I could.”

Her eyes softened but not enough for her to back down. You already knew what she would most likely say. She wasn’t going to agree to this or find it smart.

“Doc-“

“Nami, please.”

“I’m not trying to be the bad guy here,” she whispered, her words fierce with pleading for you to understand. “But this is not a good idea.”

“Nami-“

“It’s dangerous, Doc.” Her words stopped whatever argument you wanted to make. How could helping people be wrong? “I need you to understand the risk you are taking in doing this. If Arlong finds out-“

“Who is going to tell him, Nami? You?”

Your words came out meaner - sharper - than you intended, but the irritation that flared through you wasn’t something you could hide. How could she tell you she was glad Arlong didn’t take away your love for helping others and turn around and tell you not to help Nazifa’s father? It felt contradictory. It felt hypocritical. It felt like a warning label being smacked onto your forehead. 

You tried to ignore the way she deflated at your words. The flash of hurt that dulled her eyes just before she locked herself away inside herself. Away from you. 

“No. I wouldn’t, but you are forgetting that people around here are desperate for food. You take away someone’s basic needs and you’ll see how quickly they’ll turn on someone for a few scraps.”

It was logical. It was more than logical and you knew it, but with Nazifa still holding onto you…how could you tell her no? How could you send her home after she’d desperately searched for help and found you? You knew if you sent her away it would do more than just kill her father. Whatever magic Nazifa thought the world held would be gone in that one moment, and you would be damned if you were the villain in her story. 

“I hear you, Nami, I do.”

“You aren’t going to listen to me are you?”

You couldn’t answer her. All you could afford was a sharp nod of no to give her the answer she dreaded. Nami turned away from you and faced the large group of people. You wish you could’ve said something to ease whatever thought she had, but you knew it would be a lie. Nami placed her hands on her hips as she spoke. 

“Whatever you’re going to do, make it fast. I’ll handle this on my own.” 

Your heart sank as you realized maybe what Nami found more disappointing was that she’d expected you to be there for her. Whatever this village was to her and her past she’d expected you to be there with her while she did this. 

You didn’t know what to say so you took Nazifa’s hand and motioned for her to lead you to where you needed to go. The little girl did so without hesitation. She dragged you back towards a close knit row of huts off to your right. You thought she was about to take you completely out of the village when you stopped at the very last house. 

Once inside, you’d found an elderly woman at the bedside of a man you could only guess was Nazifa’s father. The elderly woman tried to rise up from her chair when Nazifa informed her just who you were. 

“It’s the healer, Va.” 

The healer. The doctor. Medicine woman. Witch. All of these you’d heard during your time with Naan. None of them had ever been used to describe who you were until you’d joined Luffy’s crew. 

Luffy who believed in you more than you’d ever believed in yourself. Usopp who talked you up even when you felt like you could never compare. It was at this moment inside of Nazifa’s family’s hut that you had the chance to prove exactly what you were capable of. You weren’t Naan. You didn’t have decades worth of knowledge and experience, but you knew you could be better. Naan never left Syrup village. Her knowledge was limited. Her encounters with those who were sick even more limited. 

You could do better. Be better. 

You took in a deep breath as you moved forward with more confidence than you felt. Your eyes swiftly did a visual assessment of the parlor of his skin, the yellow of his eyes, and the struggling breaths that deepened at his thorax. You set to work pulling out a stethoscope Nami had tucked inside the thick satchel along with the tonics you’d brought and set to work. 

By the time you left the hut and headed back towards where you’d left Nami you felt a strong sense of accomplishment. While you hadn’t exactly been able to find out what it was that was making Nazifa’s father so sick, you’d improved his breathing and eased his suffering enough that he was able to finally sleep. You’d left behind an antibiotic of sorts to help fight any infection that might be in his blood and promised to come back to check on him. 

You were almost back to where you’d left Nami when you heard her. There was no mistaking the anger in her tone; the fear that made each word wobble in uncertainty. 

“Luffy. What are you doing here?”

Luffy??

Luffy was here? If Luffy was here then that meant…

No. No, you couldn’t let yourself hope that he’d been crazy enough to come and get you - to come and save Nami. But you knew, even without the years of knowing someone like the way you knew Usopp, there was no way Luffy would let Arlong keep you. 

Your eyes scanned over the crowd as it began to disperse. You were struggling to find the mint green of her tank top. It had to be the easiest thing to spot it had to be- 

You knew that bandana anywhere. You’d saved up two months of your allowance helping Naan to get him that one for his fifteenth birthday. 

“Usopp?”

You needed to know it was him and that your eyes weren’t playing cruel tricks on you. You were rewarded with his head whipping up - searching - for the owner of the voice. Your voice. When his eyes landed on your figure the result was instant. The both of you broke out into a run that ended with you colliding into one another. The force of his body slamming into yours knocked the wind out of you, but you didn’t care. Not when your arms were able to find a home around his shoulders. It was easy to forget that your ribs were bruised until he squeezed just a little too tight. 

In a flash, you felt like you were seven-years-old again and back on the beach. Usopp’s slingshot spread back to ward off anyone who would try to harm you. The memory made your arms tighten like ivy around him with your face burying deep into his shoulder. 

“Hey, hey, everything is going to be okay, Doc. The Great Captain Usopp has come to rescue you.” 

You didn’t want to peel yourself off him, but his hands were already on your shoulders and gently moving you away from him. He hadn’t seen yet what you looked like. It’s hard to get a clear view of someone when they are sprinting head on towards you. You tried to keep your eyes directed at the toes of your boots, but an all too familiar cook’s voice snapped your head back up. 

“Jesus, Doc, what did they do to you?”

You didn’t give him a response. You couldn’t. Not when you felt a dam of emotion crashing against your chest. If you spoke, you might break. So, you reached up and quickly pulled Sanji into a hug of his own and, without question, he responded in kind. His hands, however, held you more delicately than Usopp. Sanji saw your face. His eyes no doubt took in the extent of the damage to your body and deemed you fragile like fine china. 

You tried to think of what you should say. What you should ask. 

Ask about him. 

That’s what you really wanted to do until your eyes peaked over Sanji’s shoulder. The glimpse of moss-colored hair forced your arms to retract from the hug sooner than you would’ve liked, but your racing heart demanded confirmation that you weren’t being delusional. That Arlong hadn’t drowned every last bit of sanity from your mind. 

It wasn’t until Sanji released you and stepped back that Zoro came into view and, suddenly, your world felt whole again. 

You were hugging the waiter. 

Zoro could handle you hugging Usopp. It was logical. It made sense. But the waiter? Zoro wondered what fresh hell he’d walked into for this to even be a possibility. 

It wasn’t until he watched your arms slowly relax away from his shoulders that he prepared himself for when you would turn and face him. When you would finally realize he was there too and waiting along with everybody else. 

In a million ways this scenario played out in his head. While he’d laid aboard the Merry in his hammock staring up at the ceiling and imagined how you would look seeing him awake. Would time stop like it had in his dream? With your eyes glassy - ready to shatter - and your lips parted with either curse or praise ready for his to take on. Or when he’d stood at the stern of the ship, a piece of the broken bottle he’d shattered in his room pressed tight in his hand, as he looked out over the cerulean waters and played out how you’d both react to seeing each other again. 

Realistically, he wanted to remain stoic and calm. Zoro liked to imagine you, however, bolting towards him with all your chaotic energy bursting at the seams and engulfing him. His body instantly reacting to the charge of your body colliding into his and demanding his reaction. But Zoro himself? He couldn’t see himself being anything less than who he was, but the minute he heard your voice shout Usopp’s name, Zoro could no longer deny the way his heart raced. 

He wanted to hear you call his name with the same excitement and end it with the same breathless sound of disbelief. The jealousy that enveloped his heart and squeezed until he was ready to snarl felt like a dangerous thing when he realized the waiter had moved forward after Usopp let go and you’d wrapped your arms around him. The asshole practically tugged your feet off the ground with how tightly he held you. 

It must have been the sound of his thumb flicking the Wado Ichimonji free from his sheath that reminded everyone that he was there. It reminded the waiter he was there by the way his shoulders tensed: the way his arms dropped like a shrug from your body to step back and stare at Zoro. 

Zoro couldn’t care less. 

He’d been waiting - daydreaming - far too long about all the scenes that could play out. The desperate way his hands ached to reach out and touch you. Zoro knew he wanted you in every single way he could have you, and gods be with whoever got in his way. 

Waiters included. 

He wanted to have you come barreling towards him - to knock the wind out of him from being so excited to see him. It wasn’t until you’d let go of the waiter that Zoro realized you did knock the wind out of his lungs, but not in the way he’d hoped. 

You looked like his but something was wrong. The fire that burned behind your eyes was dulled out until it quietly roared. The smile that brightened up your face now barely moved past the cracks on your lips to shine a painful light on a kaleidoscope of bruises and cuts that decorated your face, neck, and - 

How far did they go? 

Zoro had imagined himself being stoic and unmoving; waiting for you to collide into him. Instead, he felt his body close the final gaps between the two of you in three solid strides with his hands carefully grabbing at your face. He saw the wince just as his palms touched down on your cheeks, and his thumbs gently moved you around so he could get the full extent of what exactly he was seeing.

“Who did this?”

A fire hotter than hell raged in his belly. It roared in his veins and threatened to burst out of him in a blur of cuts and violence. He wanted to kill every son of a bitch who’d laid a hand on you. 

“Zoro-“

It was the first time he’d heard you say his name. He’d imagined it sounding sweeter than the caution that was laced in your tone. 

“I know you’re an idiot but you can’t be that much of an idiot, shit stick,” Buggy snapped from inside the pouch at the waiter's back. You looked around confused and, if it was different circumstances, Zoro would’ve thought it was cute. “Obviously, whatever it is, Arlong did it. Again. Bad. Fish. Get it, yet?”

Zoro could tell it was true. The fear that flashed in your eyes. The sheer hatred that came after that took him by such surprise it knocked back his next words. It was all he needed to know that whatever it was this fishman was doing, it was enough to make your rose colored glasses fade into something horrific.

Zoro wasn’t sure why that thought broke him as much as it did. 

But he could see it wasn’t just Arlong. The more he looked, the more he could see from the tank top you wore a deep bruise that bloomed upwards like a riptide from between your breasts. The shallow breaths you took indicated to him your ribs were either fractured or broken. 

With every new swipe of his eyes across your body a new horror was unleashed and Zoro could barely think straight. His body vibrated violently as he held you, to the point your own hands wrapping securely at his wrists wasn’t to ground you, but him. 

The flash of orange hair in his peripherals told him Nami had finally made it to the group and his eyes lashed out to take hold of where she stood. 

“You let them do this to her?” His voice was the epitome of darkness. The boogeyman in body and voice as he tried to let you go and move towards Nami. 

“I didn’t let them do anything to her.”

Nami deserved more credit. The flash of uncertainty moved like a reflection through her icy expression just enough to know she was nervous. 

“She went to protect you and this is how you repay her?” Zoro sheathed. 

Whether it was to protect Nami or make sure she wasn’t alone it didn’t matter. Zoro knew you left to protect Luffy, but he also knew it was to protect Nami too. Whether it was from Arlong or herself, it didn’t matter. What mattered was the fact you believed you were doing it in the service of helping, and all Zoro could see was the abuse of that trust. The abuse of you. 

He tried to pull away but you moved in front of him. Your hands still holding onto his wrists even as he’d dropped his hands from your face. His hand struggling to find the hilt of the Wado Ichimonji for - for what? 

“Doc made her choice to come. Nobody asked her too, and I don’t need protection. I don’t need any of you.”

Her words only threatened to send him further over the deep end. He watched as you closed your eyes listening to Nami as she directed daggers at every single one of them. Zoro wasn’t sure if it’s because you’d heard the same speech on repeat or if it was something else. Maybe there was something else there they couldn’t see. It all felt possible because when you opened your eyes again to look up at him a tiredness settled into your shoulders and deepened the lines on your face. 

He should’ve asked more questions. Should’ve cared to do so. All Zoro cared about was the way you looked at him. 

Save me, Pirate Hunter…

His eyes roamed over your face and he knew he would do whatever it took to do just that. 

Luffy moved forward to talk to Nami, and Zoro wanted to tell him not to bother. This whole trip felt like a waste to save someone who didn’t seem particularly ready to be saved. Zoro thought you did, but something was gnawing at him. 

Let Luffy handle Nami. He would handle you. 

Zoro was steeling himself to say - what? He wasn’t sure and for a heart stopping minute it didn’t matter. Not when you looked up at him with mischief in your eyes and a smile that ruined his whole world. 

“I am so, so happy to see you’re awake.”

I woke up for you. 

A braver man would’ve said it. A man looking at the woman who had bewitched them both body and soul would say it. Zoro wanted to say it. He needed to get it out but he was torn between words and actions. He allowed himself to give into one of them when a tear slid down your face. His hand moved up to have his finger gently wipe it away. 

“I came to save you.”

A soft laugh pushed past your lips. Zoro wanted to crash his against yours to capture the sound and house it inside him forever. 

“I know.”

And you did. Surely by now there was no way he was being stoic; an unreadable force that stood unmoving against your hurricane. Zoro knew he was swept up and for once he didn’t care. He wasn’t sure what he would have said in return at that moment. All thoughts ceased when Nami’s words cut through the fog and reminded him of where they were. 

“Come on, Doc. We have to head back.”

“You must be out of your fucking mind if you think I’m letting you take her anywhere.”

Zoro’s words were final. He wasn’t leaving any room for discussion. How Nami would think even for a second that Luffy himself would let her take you back was beyond-

“I have to go-“

“Doc, you don’t need to go anywhere.” 

Luffy took a small step forward to remind you that he was there too. They were all there for you, but he made sure that Zoro and you still resided alone in the space Zoro created. 

“Doc. Look at you.” 

Usopp didn’t just sound defeated. The heartbreak was evident in his entire body as he motioned towards you. Usopp mentioned looking but he wasn’t able to do it himself. Every time Zoro caught him trying to stare at you, he watched as Usopp turned away. 

“How can you ask to go back - expect any of us to let you go back - when you look like this?”

If Zoro couldn’t make you see reason then maybe it would be Usopp. You’d tucked your chin against your chest, which made it impossible for him to see your eyes. Zoro didn’t need to see you to know what you were going to say. 

He was sure it was meant for everyone, but your voice was so soft Zoro could barely hear you. He wished he hadn’t. 

“You don’t understand. If I don’t go back he’ll hurt Nami or someone in the village. I can’t just leave.”

All the rage his body had begun to release came flooding back. He wanted to shake you - scream that you were being a fool but Zoro knew it was pointless. He remembered the determination that hardened your eyes in that damn lavender field when you told him caring didn’t make someone weak. Maybe it didn’t make them weak, but it sure as hell made them stupid. 

His nerves were frayed at the end and, like a drowning man, he reached for something to keep him grounded. Zoro was aware that both of his hands were back to clutching onto your face like the waves to the shore. His thumbs absentmindedly running along your checks to soothe either you or him, he wasn’t sure. He didn’t care that the position left no space between either of you. Zoro could care less what anyone thought or how intimate it placed you. What could he do to make you see that going back was suicide? 

Your hands were clutching at his wrists and Zoro allowed himself to believe that it meant you were staying. That the pleading in your eyes was for something else unspoken and not for him to let you go. How could he do that when he’d just found you? He could feel his own plea building at the back of his tongue. 

How was he supposed to let you go when you were going back to danger? When you were going somewhere he couldn’t follow and he couldn’t protect you the way he should. 

“And what about me?” 

Those four words fell without permission from his lips, and Zoro silently hated himself for it. He wanted to be selfish and say them. There wasn’t any denying it. He wanted to keep you rooted next to him forever and kill anything that tried to harm you again. Zoro wanted it so badly he could feel his hands tightening around you, his hand itching to take hold of the Wado and plunge it into every last fishmen who’d been fool enough to touch you, and it took every last ounce of strength he had left to stop. He didn’t want to put you in a place to choose, but the swelling of your right eye and the delicate mapping of purple and green bruises under the surface of your skin demanded he did. 

“Zoro. Please. Please, don’t make me choose.”

You did whisper this time. Your voice was too soft to carry past the small space he’d created with his body. Zoro was aware that what little space that’d been left between the two of you was gone. His body having closed it without him knowing, and his forehead inches away from resting down on yours. 

“I can’t let you go back.”

The words choked their way free from his chest. They weren’t tinged with sadness or melancholy, but colored in every last ounce of self-control he had left. 

This time, he did allow his forehead to dip those last remaining inches to gently press against yours. He hated how his own voice, under all that hellfire, sounded weak. He wanted to be strong, but a sickness of fear was brewing in his gut. The unknown weighed down on him until it threatened to crush him into the dirt. 

“What do you want me to say? What is it you need me to say to keep you here? What if I tell you, right now, I’m sorry-“

“Zoro,” there it was - the crack in your voice. “Zoro, I am begging you not to do this now.”

“Why not? What if this is the last time I get to see you before you run off and play the sacrificial lamb.” 

“You act like I wouldn’t sacrifice myself for you too!”

Your words dimmed the tide of his rising anger. It wasn’t real. He knew his growing rage steamed from the terror growing in his chest that he would let you go and this would be the last time he’d ever get to hold you. Feel his hands on your face and your eyes looking up at him like you wanted nothing else but him. 

Zoro prayed you could see how much he wanted you - how stupid he was to deny the fondness he held for you in his chest. He believed that you both had nothing but time stretched out before you, and he was learning painfully fast that life didn’t play by romanticized thoughts. 

He should’ve told you sooner…

“And you act like I wouldn’t give mine just to make sure you were safe. I woke up and found you gone with a stupid letter telling me to apologize.”

“It doesn’t seem like you’re doing much of any kind of apologizing, by the way.” 

There you were. That light smile on your lips that tilted them just enough. It wasn’t a full one, not the one he'd groan to love, but it was enough. The spark of mirth in your eyes that rose like a shooting star and fell just as quickly. 

“That comes after she admits that she needs to stay next to me where I can keep her safe.” 

He already knew what you were going to say before you looked away from him forcing him to release his hands from your face. He knew your answer as if you were both tethered together, because only though it had been a few weeks, Zoro knew you enough that you would never let someone take your place. 

When you looked back at him, Zoro felt his world spin as he tried to quiet the rushing tide of blood to his heart. He needed to keep his composure for you, but knew he was failing miserably. He felt so helpless and it only grew worse when the first tear slid down your cheek. 

“He will hurt Nami. The village. The children. One life for the life of many is a small price to pay.” 

“And what if I say it’s a big price for me? Why can’t you see that? I’m not great with words. I don’t say the right things -“ he spoke your name and Zoro watched the way it affected you. He would say it over and over again like he was worshiping at your altar if it would make you stay. “A piece of me will die if anything to you. Do you understand that?” 

And there it was. The truth Zoro had wanted to stay away from. Seven years ago, he found out what it felt like to lose someone he loved. 

Kuina. 

Seven years and the pain of her loss stuck with him like a fresh wound. The promise they’d made the only memory he could carry forward for her along with her sword. What could he keep with him if you died? A shattered bottle and words of regret to gather dust on his conscience.

“Doc, we need to go. Now.”

Zoro couldn’t stop himself from tearing his eyes away to look at Nami who was currently looking at all of them like she hated every last one of them. The rage that Zoro had suppressed was stoked back to life at Nami’s words. It was a welcome familiar feeling compared to his chest feeling like it would cave in at any minute. The harsh way she spoke to you like you weren’t her crew mate - a friend. Like you weren’t risking your life for her the same way Luffy was. 

“She’s not going back with you,” Zoro snapped. His own jaw set tight as that rage boiled hot under his blood. “You can go back on your own and deal with your own consciences.”

“Excuse me?”

Nami didn’t back down under the weight of his gaze; the way his eyes dug daggers into her. 

“You heard me.”

“Oh, I heard you, but she’s about as much a part of this crew as I am. Which is none. She’s branded an Arlong Pirate, just the same as me. Doc. Let’s. Go.”

Branded? Where? 

You went to step back and Zoro’s hand lashed out to grab at your forearm to yank you back. You were about to crash into his chest, his other arm ready to lock around your waist, when you surprised him with your own fit of strength and pulled yourself free, causing youself to stumble back. 

“Enough, Zoro!” You hissed. “I’m going back and it’s final. I’m not going to let someone else pay for my choices.”

His body threatened to lurch forward again. To grab you and throw you over his shoulder if thats what it took to get you to come back to the ship with him. Before he could even make his move, you gave him one last look before you turned on your heel and jogged over to Nami leaving him where you’d both stood alone. He watched as Nami cast them all one last look of defiance before she said something to you - something that made you both move faster out of the village. 

A nervous laugh cut through the tension the silence created, and Zoro didn’t have to look over to know it was Usopp. He was currently adjusting his bandana as he watched until your retreating forms completely disappeared from view.

“That went about as bad as it possibly could have gone,” Usopp laughed, his voice filled with unease. 

“We should have stopped Doc,” Sanji huffed. “Did you see how she looked?”

“We all saw how she looked,” Zoro snapped. 

Sanji’s eyes narrowed in on him and Zoro was ready to welcome the fight. Anything to release the storm of emotion that was building inside of him. 

“Yeah, you saw it, and yet, you let her go. Some big man you are.”

Zoro felt his feet shift in the sand with his hand on the hilt of the Wado, ready to unsheathe the blade, when Luffy thoughtlessly moved between them. His eyes still turned towards the gates of the village you’d left through. 

“I bet Doc knows something more than she can say.”

“How can you be so sure, Luffy?” Usopp asked. 

It didn’t surprise Zoro to see a small smile creep at the edges of his mouth in an attempt to lighten the load of his thoughts. He was trying to put them all at ease, which felt like a mountain of a task with the memory your battered body left on their souls. 

“Because I know, Doc. She leads with her heart, and I’m going to trust her on this. Come on. We are going to do some digging of our own. Hey, scar guy!”

With one final glance at the gate all four of them moved towards the gentleman standing at the edge of his house. His eyes filled with distrust as he watched them move towards him. Zoro could care less about finding out more information about Nami and her reasons, but if it helped him get closer to wherever you were he would gladly follow Luffy’s lead. As long as it leads him back to you. 

Nami and you walked in silence. You didn’t know what to say and, by the way she was gripping the tribute box, neither did she. You weren’t sure what had been said between Luffy and Nami. What she said to the rest of the crew. You knew whatever it was it hadn’t been the truth, and saying it had broken another piece of who she was - what she wanted. 

You wanted to comfort her. Say some pretty words that may, or may not, heal her world like the magic inside the books of fairytales. You wanted to have magic the way fairy godmother’s seemed to have where all the girls’ dreams came true, and all the bad things in their life made sense.

Sometimes, bad things happen to those least deserving. It didn’t have a rhyme or reason. The world just wasn’t built on make believe no matter how many times when you were little you hoped it was. Yes. You wanted to say something profound and meaningful, but another part of you wanted to turn around and run back to him. 

Zoro was awake. He was awake and okay, well, about as okay as one could be when you’re still healing a large gash across your chest. 

I came to save you. 

You wish you could memorize those words - the way he looked at you - forever in the pages of your notebook. Maybe one of these days you would commit the image to the page, buried between recipes and diagrams of plants and the body. Your own secret page bookmarked with a snowdrop. 

Zoro didn’t say it. Not outright that what you felt that night in the galley wasn’t just you. Somewhere along the lines of annoyance, the two of you had unexpectedly fallen for one another. For so long, you thought it was just you. That you were crazy and the shared looks as you both said goodnight were just your imagination. He had always been intense. The way he looked at you and the weight of his gaze that always felt like a challenge. You never realized before but, while that same intensity hardened the darkness in his eyes, Zoro softened just a little when he looked at you. 

You witnessed it today when his hands took hold of your face and became rooted there to hold you. His body pressed itself against yours in a way you weren’t even sure Zoro had been aware of. It all happened so fast. An embarrassment burned against your cheeks as you remembered his reaction came from seeing you. 

How awful did you look? 

You didn’t know - couldn’t know. Mirrors weren’t really a luxury afforded to you at the moment. Not that you really wanted to know how you looked. You were so deep in thought you hadn’t realized Nami came to a stop a few feet back. The sound of her calling your name bringing you back to the present. 

“Earth to Doc! Where are you going?”

“Sorry, I was just-“ Nami waited for you to answer and you would have if you didn’t finally notice she was holding a shovel. “Never mind, it doesn’t matter. Hey, why are you holding a shovel?”

This is Grade A detective work you were doing. For further emphasis, in case Nami didn’t quit get what you meant, you added in a little pointing to drive the question home. 

“The village was short on their payment. I can’t go back to Arlong with what they have.”

“Yes. Okay. I’m not following. Why do you still have a shovel?”

The eye roll Nami gave was heard by the gods. She didn’t answer you right away. She took off her satchel and set it down beside a tree and walked over towards the opposite side of a grave site. The shovel struck down hard into the earth and brought up dirt all before she answered you. 

“If we go back without the full amount, Arlong will send someone to that village and have them killed. Since no one paid the tribute fee that means all of them will be killed. Do you get it now?”

You felt sick. Your own feet carried you over to the opposite side of Nami. You needed to see her face when you asked her, “Why is it called a tribute payment?”

You felt like you knew why it was a tribute. You just hoped maybe, for once, Nami could prove you wrong and the situation wasn’t as bad as it seemed. Nami rolled her tongue across the inside of her cheek as she regarded you. A sinking feeling was growing as you realized she didn’t want to say it either. 

“It’s a tribute to Arlong for letting them live. They can’t pay, and they lose their usefulness.”

“Okay. So, again I ask, why are we here? What’s with the shovel?”

“I have money, okay! I have money buried here to pay for every last villager so that way Arlong doesn’t attack them.”

Nami’s chest was rising and falling like she’d just run a marathon. Or finally spoke her truth. How long had Nami paid for every villager to keep them alive? How long had she continued to be the figure of their hatred without them ever knowing exactly what it was she sacrificed for them?

“Nami-“

She swiftly held up her hand to stop you from continuing. 

“Don’t, Doc. It’s fine.”

“It’s not fine, Nami! What else have you been doing? I knew it. I knew there was no way in hell you would work for that asshole without a reason.”

“And what do you think it is going to prove?”

“That you are a good fucking person, Nami! A good person who deserves so much more than this.”

You were both screaming at each other. The two of you are a mirror of the self-control that was slowly dwindling between the rapid rise and fall of your chests. You took a cautious step towards her and for a moment you thought she was going to hit you with the shovel to keep you away. 

“Nami, Luffy is here. He came here for us. If you tell him what is going on-“

“He doesn’t need to know. I have the money to pay for the villagers and to buy back the village. Once that’s done, I’m done with Arlong.”

I’m free. Those were the unspoken words that clung to the air between you. You wanted to ask her if she really believed that, because you didn’t. You’d only known Arlong for a week but it was enough to tell you he wasn’t going to let anyone go. 

“You don’t have to do it alone. Not anymore. Please, let me go back and tell Luffy.”

“No. After what I said to them…”

She couldn’t finish. You didn’t know what all was said, but you knew Luffy was still here. That underneath all the denial Nami threw his way, Luffy had been able to see it was just a defense mechanism. You weren’t sure if magic was real in the world, but if it was real, somehow Luffy possessed a form of it. He had the ability to see people for who they truly were. To see the dreams of others, and believe in them even when they didn’t believe in themselves. 

Nami was always the one who never mentioned a dream she held close. In the nights when promises, hopes, and dreams were mentioned Nami never shared hers. Everyone assumed she just didn’t have one - that the world jaded her enough to completely steal it away. Only Luffy knew deep down she had one and wasn’t willing to give up on her until she realized it too. 

“You know, no matter what you’ve said to him, Luffy isn’t going to hold it against you. You don’t have to do this alone, Nami. Not when you have a family who loves you.”

Your words jerked her head up and she looked ready to bolt. To argue with you and tell you that she didn’t have a family - you weren’t a family, but family didn’t need to be by blood. Blood didn’t make someone love you. It was the choice to do so, and even if Nami fought you until she was blue in the face you would still choose to call her family. 

You took a step towards her and stopped just mere inches from her. Your hands carefully reached out to grab her shoulders to help her understand you weren’t going anywhere. 

“I’ll only tell Luffy if that’s what you want, Nami, but I promise you the rest of them feel the same way. They wouldn’t have come here for you if they didn’t.”

“Zoro came here for you,” she noted. 

“That’s besides the point.”

Nami looked at you and for once she did it without her usual mask of indifference. The only thing you saw in her eyes was a mixture of fear and relief and you weren’t sure which one it was that was winning. 

“This isn’t your fight. Why would you do this? I don’t understand.”

“I told you. We're family. I know you aren’t leaving until you finish this, and I’m not leaving without you.”

Nami’s worry became all the more evident as her teeth began to gnaw at her bottom lip. She was struggling to decide what action to take. Your offer would remain even if she told you right now it wasn’t going to happen. You meant it when you told her that you weren’t leaving this hellhole without her. 

You were about to say something else - maybe less heartfelt and more cringy - but Nami saved you by blowing out a breath. You dropped your hands away from her and waited as patiently as you could for her answer. 

“Okay.”

“Yes!”

You couldn’t keep yourself from doing a victory jump. You wish Usopp was there. You both could’ve been jumping and screaming together. 

“If you are going to do that I’ll take it back.”

“Too late! You already said okay.” 

“I swear to god if you start dancing I’m leaving.” Nami really knew how to kill the mood. “Look, we still need to bring the tribute payment back. I’ll dig this up, deliver it, and remind Arlong of our deal. You try and find Luffy and meet me at the edge of the tangerine grove by the park.”

“That was one hell of a fast plan.”

Nami shrugged before she grabbed the shovel and started digging. 

“Plans are what I do. Now get going. It’s already getting dark.”

You glanced up at the sky and found its usual blue hue burning into a warm orange with the smoke of darkness following closely behind. Nami knew that you were running out of time. Whether this plan of hers worked or not, if neither of you returned back to Arlong Park, you knew he would come looking for you both. 

“Promise me you won’t do anything major until I’m back.”

“Are you seriously asking me that?”

“Nami-“

“Because you’re the one usually making rash decisions-“

“Nami, promise me.”

You didn’t care if fear laced inside your voice and forced it to shatter. You weren’t worried about being brave because you were scared as hell. You’d be a fool to be any different. There were so many unknowns stretched out before you both. Connecting paths that wound their way to places neither of you had touched. 

With one last look back at Nami, she finally gave you a nod before she whispered, “I promise,” before you bolted back towards Coco Village. You could hear her screaming after you that you hadn’t promised back. You were well aware you hadn’t and honestly, you never intended too. 

Why did it seem like you were always running? When you first meet Luffy, Nami, and Zoro you ran out of Kaya’s house trying to save Luffy from the poison he’d ingested meant for Kaya. You’d run back to find Zoro climbing out of a well which, come to think of it, you never asked him why he was down there in the first place. Then followed Zoro in the wrong direction to stumble upon Luffy who sent all three of you sprinting back towards the house. You’d thought after that day you were done with running. 

The universe must have found it hilarious that you were sprinting back towards Coco Village. Your muscles burning as you force yourself to move faster down grove after grove. The chances of Luffy and them still standing in the spot you’d left them wasn’t realistic. Would it have been convenient? Hell yes. Realistic? Absolutely not. 

You came to a sliding stop through the village gates. It was hard not to take notice of the villagers giving you dirty looks for your haphazard entrance. Usually, you would’ve felt more apologetic but you didn’t have time for pleasantries. 

You made your way around the giant tree that was centered in the middle of the village. The last place you’d seen them had been on the East side of the huts. They’d walked in to see Nami collecting the tribute payment while you’d been off with Nazifa. Now there wasn’t any trace that they’d even been there. 

Your mind was racing trying to figure out where they might have gone. You weren’t a bloodhound. Without any indication or note or flare in the sky it felt like a wild goose chase in finding them. Your hands went up to scrub in irritation at your face, and when you brought them back down from your face Nazifa was just there in front of you. A scream tore from your throat that caused you both to jump. Every villager out that night sent you both death glares that forced you to hold up your hands in apology. 

“Nazifa, you scared me.”

“You came back so soon. I thought you said you’d be back in a few days.”

“My friends. The one in the straw hat: do you by chance know where they went?”

When she shook her tiny head no you tried not to deflate. This wasn’t the time to get sad or down. Nami was still waiting for you to get bac-

“No I don’t. Mr. Genzo might.”

“Mr. Genzo?”

Nazifa turned and pointed to the constable who stood back out on the deck of his office. You thanked Nazifa for the info and walked towards him. It was easy to see the minute his eyes caught sight of you, mistrust clouded his features. It wasn’t just that he didn’t know you. He’d seen you with Nami. 

You tried to plaster on a friendly smile and felt your busted lip crack under the strain. It was a great reminder that under different circumstances you might have been able to win him over with your warmth. In your current state, however, you looked less inviting, and more like a walking punching bag. 

“Hello.” You followed up your opening statement with an awkward wave. “I was wondering if you might be able to help me. A few of my friends were here earlier.”

“The Pirate Hunter in the straw hat.”

You felt yourself slowly blink at him as your brain tried to process what he’d just said. 

“Pirate…Hunter?”

“Yeah. It’s what the green-haired guy with the sword said. They said they were here for Arlong’s bounty.” 

It was smart. You were willing to bet Zoro had mentioned it to save Luffy from telling Mr. Genzo he was a pirate. It probably wouldn’t have won over any favors from him or the villagers if he’d mentioned his intentions of being The Pirate King. 

“Yes. Those guys. Do you know where they might have gone?”

“They asked about Nojiko. If you’re looking for them, I sent them down to her house. It’s at the edge of the tangerine grove.”

Fucking great. You tried to smile past the pain of realizing that meant you were once again going to have to run. You turned sharply on your heel and started running down the direction that Genzo mentioned. 

It felt like you could’ve been running back towards Nami. The endless sea of tangerines that you’d fallen in love with earlier suddenly felt overwhelming. The citrus in the air only grew heavier the further you went inside the pasture. It was the only thing that let you know you weren’t headed back to Arlong Park, where the smell of citrus was replaced with fish. 

Your muscles were beginning to burn and your breathing labored the further you went. You were deadly close to giving up - slowing down to a crawl when you remembered Nami was no doubt back at Arlong Park. The money she’d stolen to save the people in her village was handed over to the very monster who imprisoned you both. Tormented you both. 

What would she tell him when she walked in and you weren’t by her side? How much time could one of her well-constructed lies give you before Arlong’s distrust sent his people out searching for you? You couldn’t afford to slow down no matter how much your muscles threatened to collapse. You refused to give him the chance to hurt Nami or anyone else. 

With that thought still searing through your brain you came crashing through the end of the grove. The dirt path widening to show a worn down lane placed to walk between the three huts that were scattered. Your eyes scanned down to the very last hut where the light of candles burned. 

“Last hut at the end,” you hummed to yourself. 

You tried to start running the last few feet but your legs refused to move. Your legs almost crumbled at the suggestion so you settled for a brisk walk. You were almost to the house when your eyes caught his figure. He was sitting out on a rock. The Wado clasped tightly in his hand and held the length of his body. If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve thought he was napping like he usually did, but the closer you got to the hut the easier it was for you to see the tightness that resonated throughout his body. 

Gods, you’d forgotten how good he looked in that damn cloud button up. The different hues of blue made his current ashen tone more apparent and made you long for the healthy glow the sun had deepened into his skin. The only thing you hadn’t forgotten is the look on his face as you’d left him standing inside the village. His pleas haunting you with each step you took; your muscles aching to turn around and collide back into him. 

You knew it had taken everything for Zoro to speak so openly - so honest - with you the way he did. It was everything you’d wanted to hear that night in the galley. It seemed you were both doomed to be speaking at the wrong place at the wrong time. 

You were only a few inches away from him now when his head turned in your direction. The minute his eyes opened and Zoro saw it was you he was up and moving. His hand quickly slid the Wado Ichimonji back into the holster at his hip. It felt wrong seeing him with only one. Your mind seemed keen to remind you exactly why Zoro only had one sword left. 

Flashes of Mihawk slicing through his swords in a clash of metal made your body jerk. Your heart clamored in horror in your chest: you didn’t want to remember the next part. Your memories didn’t care about your feelings, and as Zoro moved towards you, a flash of discomfort so brief ran through him it caused his hand to involuntarily touch his chest. It was all your nightmares needed to revisit one of the worst moments of your life. 

By the time Zoro was within reaching distance, your hands shot out to grab at his face the way he’d held on to yours. It felt so damn good to be able to feel his skin underneath your palms. The soft tickle of his breath touching on your skin to let you know Zoro was alive. He was real and whole and he was yours. If only for this moment, because he didn’t push you away. 

A cautious hand reached down to lay claim at your waist and every nerve within your body came alive at his touch. How was it possible to experience something so simple as a touch and it felt this electric? It couldn’t be normal to feel at peace and trapped inside a hurricane all at once, but that was exactly what it felt like standing in Zoro’s presence. 

“Doc, what are you doing here?”

Yes, what were you even doing anymore? You’d come for a reason and it wasn’t just to stand here gawking up at him and-

“Nami.”

“Nami?”

Zoro repeated her name back to you. The confusion only creased his brow further as his eyes scanned over your face. That was all it took for you to release the hold that you had on him. Your feet trying to backpedal away from him, to find safety in the shadows, but you’d forgotten one minor detail. His hand was still rooted to your body and when you moved to step back, Zoro easily followed. 

“Zoro, please.”

Gods, whatever you do, do not cry. If you started, you weren’t sure you would ever stop. 

“Doc, what’s wrong?”

He just didn’t know how to read people. Zoro was too busy trying to gently get you to look back at him. Gently because he wasn’t blind. He no doubt saw every bruise and cut and gods know what else that littered across the expanse of your skin. You weren’t sure why that knowledge made you hate it even more. 

“I know I look terrible.”

You tried again in vain to move away. Zoro refused to budge in his hold and when you tried to look away his hand gently caught your cheek. With the same softness you weren’t aware he even possessed, Zoro tilted your chin up until your eyes finally locked with his. 

“I’ve never seen anyone look more beautiful.” 

It was at this moment you realized you were dangerously close to breaking down. The only thing that kept you from doing it was the wince you earned when you thoughtlessly placed your hand on his chest. 

“Oh gods, Zoro I’m so sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”

“It’s fine.”

“It’s not fine. When was the last time you had it properly cleaned? Changed the dressing? Have you been taking the antibiotic I left you?”

This was familiar and safe. The emotions that threatened to capsize you moments before were a thing of the past as you regarded him with a doctor’s keen eye. At the mention of the antibiotic you noticed a shift in his gaze and you immediately knew your answer. 

“Funny you should ask about the antibiotic-“

“Zoro,” you used his name as a warning. 

“I broke the glass it was in.”

Your response to this admission? You smacked him in his shoulder and you could’ve sworn you saw the telltale sign of a smirk. 

“Why the hell would you go and do that?”

“Maybe because the woman who made it for me decided to disappear while I was unconscious.”

“You wouldn’t have been unconscious if you hadn’t fought the world’s strongest swordsman.”

“It’s the world’s greatest swordsman,” he corrected through his teeth. 

“Whatever! Potato tomato!”

You didn’t want to tell him you were already looking at the world’s greatest swordsman, if your opinion mattered at all. But you didn’t want to take away the taste of humble pie Mihawk had bestowed to Zoro with a side of life lesson. 

“Where is Luffy? I need to talk to him about Nami.”

At the mention of her name, Zoro’s mood noticeably soured. You were tempted to smack him a second time, but tried to remember that Nami didn’t make it easy to think she needed help. Especially if she was telling you to fuck off left and right. 

“Luffy went out for a walk.”

“A walk?”

“Jesus, woman,” Zoro seethed. 

He literally looked up at the sky as if someone was supposed to answer him or something. You couldn’t stop yourself from mimicking him and asking him after your eyes drifted back down, “You find any answers up there?”

It was a wonder that this was the same man who had, hours before, looked at you like he loved you. 

“Luffy went on a walk. He’ll be back eventually if you want to wait.”

“I don’t have that kind of time, but you’re his first mate! I can just tell you.”

It was brilliant. What wasn’t brilliant? Smacking Zoro in the chest like he wasn’t trying to heal one of the biggest flesh wounds known to man. This time, you not only earned a wince but got a grunting noise that shouldn’t have sounded as sinful as it did. Even hotter was the grumpy look he gave you.

“I’ll pass if it involves you assaulting me every five seconds.”

A tsk passed through your lips as you regarded him. You were willing to bet he’d been wearing the same dressing since you’d left. With no antibiotic or ointments on the wound there was a strong possibility it could fester. 

“How about I pass along the message for you to give him while I clean your wound. I get to give you important information and you get to have a cleaned wound and a fresh bandage.”

You didn’t give him a chance to say no. You reached out and grabbed his hand and began to pull him towards the steps of the hut. It wasn’t until you were up the stairs and pushing the door open that you hadn’t thought about gently knocking on the door or giving words of introduction. You’d just assumed no one was inside and lucky for you it was. Kind of. 

You scanned the house and took notice of the dishes that were stacked next to the sink. The pot and utensils that were laid out to dry the same way a certain Chef you knew liked to do. When you were far enough inside to be comfortable, you released his hand and turned on him, almost colliding with his chest. You had to swallow down a scream of shock. 

“Okay. Start unbuttoning your shirt and I’ll tell you the message to tell Luffy.”

Zoro just stood there like an unmovable statue. You weren’t sure he was going to stay or turn around and leave until his hands slowly moved to the first button. The rough tips of his calloused fingers moved with ease to start undoing the first button on his shirt. Your throat instantly ran dry. Even worse? Zoro didn’t even look down to see if he was in the right spot. His eyes solely locked on your face and you wondered if he could see the growing blush that was beginning to tint your cheeks. 

“This feels vaguely familiar.”

Zoro’s words were tinged with teasing and this time you did catch the slight tilt of his lip as he smirked down at you. 

“What are you talking about?”

You were genuinely confused. Flustered. You were confused and most definitely flustered as Zoro was on to his third button, and gods was it hot in this particular hut or was it just you?

“A couple weeks ago I was at a mansion in Syrup village with my captain. When I went to leave my room this crazy woman was at my door, and dragged me back inside.”

“Wait a minute! Are you calling me crazy-“

“I’m having a strange sense of Deja vu.” 

While Zoro had been retelling the first time you’d met, his fingers had worked their way down to his naval. Zoro was literal seconds away - two buttons left - from exposing his chest to you. It was ridiculous. Truly, that you would be this affected by him and he still technically hadn’t exposed anything. 

You’ve treated dozens of men while back on the island. Some of them had ended up shirtless and one gentleman had even ended with his trousers around his knees while you’d tweezed out porcupine quills from his…well. From an area. This should’ve been like those times. Where you were in control. You were a professional. 

But those other men weren’t Roronoa Zoro, and nothing on this earth could have prepared you for the moment he finished with that last button. 

The shirt draped around him and left a two-inch line of his chest exposed. Under different circumstances it might have shown skin underneath, but currently a stark white bandage was your one saving grace from keeping you from completely losing your mind. A stark white bandage that was noticeably tinged with blood. 

It was all you needed to get your shit together. Yes, Zoro was an attractive man. An infuriating attractive man but he was still a man and he needed ten-

Was it normal for someone to be this muscular? You’d seen Zoro workout a couple times on the ship. Witnessed first hand the way he’d swing around eight-hundred pounds like it was nothing. The endless sets of sit-ups and push-ups he subjected himself too. It made perfect sense he would be nothing but corded hard muscle. 

You needed to push the shirt back further so you could see the extent of the wound and begin to remove the old bandage. To do that, however, it meant you had to touch him. You didn’t care if Zoro knew why you were blowing out a raspberry before your hands moved under the fabric at his shoulders. The minute your hands touched down on the skin you weren’t sure if you were going to remain calm. It became harder when you started to push back the fabric and it exposed his chest to the room. If it wasn’t for the bloody bandage, you might have completely gone off the deep end. 

“Because I am a professional,” you began, your voice lighter than a whisper, “I’m going to pretend you didn’t just suggest I was acting like a crazy pervert the first time we met.”

The tick at the corner of his mouth was the only warning you got before a smile erupted on his face. A smile that was directed towards you without restraint. It was meant solely just for you, and if it wasn’t for his hands that secured itself to your waist, it would’ve knocked you on your ass. You wanted to tell him he should smile more often but, on second thought, you weren’t sure you would survive it if he did. 

You wanted to ask how his hands were back on your hips. You were just going to change his bandage. It should’ve been so simple, but how could anything like this be simple when he was looking at you like this? Zoro kept stealing glancing down to your lips. 

“You’re bleeding. You should let me change your bandage.”

You came back. 

Zoro had been meditating on that rock waiting for Luffy. He didn’t know where his captain went after their talk on the roof, but he hadn’t been worried. He was worried about you.

His mind swirled with dozens of possibilities. A game plan for how he was going to bust inside Arlong Park and get you out. How he was going to maim and murder every last fishmen that had ever been stupid enough to touch you. 

And then you came barreling out of the tangerine grove and towards him in a fashion only you could do. It took everything in him not to get up at that moment and run to meet you. It took everything in him not to stop you, mid-rant, and silence you by crashing his lips to yours. 

Zoro was so used to being stoic. The picture of calm and unshakable to his core. All of that changed when you stepped inside his orbit, and he knew he would never be the same because of it. Zoro had to know you would always be a part of him and that meant no more denying. 

The banter between you felt damn good when it happened. It felt natural. As natural as training or having the Wado beside him everywhere he went. Zoro needed you the same way. Beside him, with the knowledge you’d be waiting for him back on the Merry when he left.

So, Zoro wasn’t sure what sparked this. It was an everyday thing. You weren’t dressed any differently - or any different than the crazy top he knew Nami was responsible for. You weren’t acting any different. You were your normal self but something inside him stirred. A storm of wants and needs was clouding his judgment and rolled through his thoughts like thunderclouds. 

“You’re bleeding. You should let me change your bandage.”

He wasn’t thinking. 

Zoro could only feel the drive to consume you in every fiber of his being until it controlled him. The flames of that consuming drive only rose higher when your hands delved under his shirt - touched his skin. 

The need. 

It’s all he felt. All he could think about. 

You were self-conscious of the way you looked, but Zoro had meant it when he told you, you were beautiful. The bruises and the cuts would fade and under all that you would remain. Zoro wasn’t worried about the physical. He worried more about what was underneath the surface, and he would make you see - know - that it changed nothing for him. Zoro would remain here with you for as long as you would have him. 

The best way to do this? A kiss.

Zoro had made his mind up the minute he’d woken up without you beside him. He wasn’t going to make the same mistake again. 

His eyes scanned your face as his hand snaked behind your neck to lift you up just enough that when his lips pressed down onto yours it was soft. Chaste. 

It was everything he didn’t want to be. 

Zoro hadn’t kissed many women. They weren’t really ever in his plans and while, yeah he had his urges, he learned to dull it out with the booze. Easier to dull it out when some of the kisses he received were from sloppy drunk women in the booths at bars. It became increasingly apparent that wasn’t the case when it came to you. Zoro found himself having to drink more just to dull simple urges like the one he was doing now.

Zoro didn’t want to dull it out. He didn’t want to fight it anymore. He would make space for you in his dreams, because you’d become a part of that too. 

He pressed his lips against yours again, and this time added more pressure. Your hand moved to mimic his hand that he’d placed on your neck, except you didn’t stop there. Your fingers delved into his hair and Zoro could feel every nerve erupt at your touch. His grip on your neck and hip tightened and brought you flush against him. 

He couldn’t hold back with chaste pecks any longer. He needed to kiss you - really kiss you - before he went mad. His tongue traced the edge of your bottom lip, begging for entrance, and you submitted to him with ease. 

With every small sound you made as his tongue delved between your lips, tasted you, and explored you a response of his own was brewing in his chest. One that was more animalistic than man: a sound that threatened to break every last reserve he had. 

You’d wrapped your arms around his shoulders and used them to pull him closer. A hand lost itself in your hair and when your fingers lightly tugged at the small hair at the base of his scalp, a growl vibrated against your lips causing his fingers to fist your hair. 

He hadn’t meant it. It was a reflex he couldn’t control and yet…

You tore your mouth away and he expected a scream; to be chastised for the randomness of the pain. Instead, he watched as a moan came strangled between heavy breaths filtered through the space. He didn’t give you a second to catch a breath before he secured a hand behind your neck and brought your lips crashing back down on his. His mouth devoured yours with a dangerous hunger that possessed him. 

Zoro wondered what pretty noises you would make for him if he’d place his hand just right on your neck. If you would like that too as he squeezed and pulled as he pushed and stretched you open just for him. What his name would sound like dripping with pleas and panting while his hips pushed up into you. What pretty noises could you make for him then? It didn’t take Zoro long before he realized he was desperate to find out. 

“I’m still sad I missed dinner, but at least I get a show.”

Everything came to a halt at the sound of an all too familiar voice. While Zoro was willing to bet you were rosy cheeks and embarrassment, he felt murderous. The minute his mouth parted from yours his head whipped around Nojiko’s hut looking for the clown in question. It wasn’t hard to spot his smug face in the corner of the room sitting on top of a barrel.

How they’d missed him when they first came in…

“It’s so great to see you again, Doc,” Buggy beamed. “Although, I’m sure I didn't miss you as much as our big strong not-so-silent swordsman here.”

Zoro had turned to face Buggy, but you’d stayed behind him. Your forehead buried into his back as you let out a groaned, “Kill me now.”

Buggy’s annoying laughter filled the small space, and all Zoro wanted to do was kick him into oblivion. 

Stupid fucking clown. 

After the beyond embarrassing moment you’d shared with Zoro inside the hut, you’d moved outside to finish cleaning and rebandaging his wound. You’d done so without any further touching. While you wanted nothing more than to allow Zoro to grab and kiss you like he had, you could still hear Buggy inside making kissy noises. 

You weren’t sure if the embarrassment would ever go away. Zoro on the other hand looked ready to murder him. 

While you rebandaged him, you’d shared what you could about Nami. Where she’d asked everyone to meet later in the night once everything was done. It wasn’t until it was time for you to leave that Zoro grabbed your arm to pull you close to him. 

“I can’t let you leave.”

Underneath all that murderous rage he was dealing with you could see the same thing you’d seen earlier that day. Fear. It must have been a wild new emotion for him, because Zoro was one of the most fearless people you ever met. You didn’t know if you should’ve found it flattering or worrisome he was scared to let you go. 

“It’ll be alright. I’ll be waiting with Nami, and once Luffy gets back you’ll all meet us there.”

“You make it sound easy.”

“It’s cause it’s Nami’s plan.”

“When has anything we’ve ever done gone to plan?”

It was a damn good question. Right now wasn’t the time to dwell on the few that hadn’t completely gone like they were supposed too. You needed him to have a little faith in the plan. 

You allowed him to pull you close by your waist. The immediate feel of him pressed tight against you sent a searing memory of his kiss, his hand tightening in your hair, and the gasp he’d coaxed from you. Gods, you wanted to kiss him again, and by the look Zoro kept giving you, you knew he did too. 

Now wasn’t the time for this. Nami was possibly waiting for you, and you didn’t want her to think you’d bailed. That the rest of your crew wasn’t coming to back her up. Gently, you placed a hand against Zoro’s chest before you looked up at him. 

“Things always work out in the end. Nami is waiting for me - for us - to be there for her. She’s been alone in this battle for too long, but she doesn’t have to be anymore.”

Zoro seemed to swallow down whatever argument he was trying to make. His obsidian eyes taking in your face, weighing his next words before a heavy sigh escaped him. 

“I don’t like this.”

“You’ve mentioned this before. And the time before that-“

“I’m being serious,” he’d used your name. Zoro hardly ever used your name. “How can you ask me to let you go back?”

“Because I need you to trust this isn’t the last time you’ll see me, Zoro.”

The both of you were trapped in a place of unknowing. He wasn’t sure what letting you go for the second time would mean and you, well, realistically you didn’t know what would be waiting for you when you got there. You just had to believe that everything was going to be okay. That all of this wasn’t going to be for nothing. 

Without giving it another thought, you moved up on your tip toes to gently press your lips against his cheek. The kiss causing his hand on your waist to tighten to try and pull you closer, but you fought against it. Your own feet begin to move away from him to start heading back through the tangerine grove. 

“I will save you. I promise and, when I do, you’re going to promise to never leave my side again.”

If darkness could be housed inside a person, you knew it would be in the form of Roronoa Zoro. As you back away, it was easy to see what all the pirates he hunted saw. His presence was menacing - a walking omen of someone’s impending demise. He was pure power embodied. Not even the night herself was willing to touch him. The edges of her darkness that played across his silhouette only outlined him further. Zoro radiated what hell itself feared and yet, he softened just for you. 

Zoro told you that you weren’t leaving his side once this was over. A part of you wanted to fight him on it; to crawl under his skin and make him bristle as you teased him. You knew, however, you’d gladly stand by his side through hell and back if that meant you were with him. 

You looked at him one last time - wanting to commit how he looked to memory - before you turned and started doing your least favorite activity. You didn’t have the luxury of taking your time. There was no telling how much time passed while you’d been tending to Zoro’s wound. You thought you were being productive while trying to explain as much as you could to him on what he needed to relay to Luffy. You were willing to bet that Zoro stopped listening halfway through your explanation. You were also willing to double down on that bet that instead of telling Luffy your much winded version, Zoro was going to condense it down to all of one sentence. If you were lucky he even did that.

Either way, you knew that Luffy would be there. You knew they would all be there to save you both. You were hyperfocused on the possible outcomes that you hadn’t heard it until it was too late. You weren’t sure it would’ve made a difference if you’d heard the footsteps before the impact. One minute, you were almost coming to the clearing at the end of the trees, and the next the air was being knocked from your lungs.

A body shot out from the dark to collide with yours. The two of you rolling around on the forest floor until you came to a stop. A forearm was pressed down against your throat. You wanted to try and buck whoever was straddling you off you, but their weight told you it would’ve been impossible. Besides, while you were trying to catch your breath, the presence of the arm pressing down on your trachea was making it worse. Your hands reached up to claw your nails down their skin in an attempt to get them to let go, just so you could catch your breath, when you felt the scales of a fishmen.

As the realization set in from the corner of your eye you watched Arlong walk from the shadows. A sickly grin already spread wide to show the rows of razor sharp teeth that only his kind could have. 

“Where do you think you are coming from?”

Somewhere in the back of your mind you could hear Zoro and his pessimistic tone warning you about plans. They never seemed to go the way you wanted. You couldn't explain why this time you’d thought it would end differently. It had too, right? So much had gone wrong last week. It only seemed fair.  

The world didn’t play in what was fair and just. 

Chew released his forearm that he’d pressed to your throat. Instantly, your body let out a violent cough that was made worse when he grabbed you by your shirt and hauled you to your feet. You’d barely got a solid breath in before Arlong launched his fist once, twice, into your stomach. You would’ve dropped to your knees if Chew wasn’t keeping you standing. Your arms pinned behind your back to leave your middle open and ready for the next assault Arlong unleashed. 

He clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth and Chew picked you up to follow him. You knew where you were going. Arlong Park was only a couple more meters ahead of you. If you had the strength to dig your feet in, to try and escape, you would have. The foreboding feeling that wrecked your nerves told you there was a chance if you went in you weren’t coming back out. 

Arlong pushed inside the gates and hundreds of his crew were pressed into every inch of the park. They all looked at you with disgust. Some of them spitting like before in your direction as Chew pushed you forward; obediently following Arlong like a good human should. It wasn’t until he’d reached his self-made throne that he took to the stage like a zealot on a soapbox. His gaze roamed out to all the crew that had assembled. The entire thing felt ominous and reminded you of cults and the sacrifices they made under torchlight. It wasn’t hard to know who that sacrifice was. 

“My brothers! We have a traitor in our midst!”

 Please don’t say it’s me, please-

“This human has infiltrated our ranks. Promising a cure for a disease her people gave us. She rewards our kindness by also turning sister Nami against us.”

“What-“

A panic flared through you at the mention of her name. Where was Nami? The fire of panic was quickly doused, however, as Arlong swung back to silence you with the back of his hand. Blood rushed inside your mouth and spilled itself past your lips to drip on the wood below. 

“Silence! You think you can turn Nami against us? Against me?” 

With each word he spoke you could see the fury that this supposed betrayal was doing to him. He was a fishman possessed with rage, and that rage came lunging forward and sinking its teeth into your left shoulder. This time you did have enough air to scream, and scream as he wiggled like a dog trying to pry meat off the bone. You couldn’t fight him off. Chew held your arms trapped behind your back. You couldn’t move back with Arlong’s hands on your arms keeping you in place. All you could do was scream and feel the tear of your flesh and muscle until he let go. 

They both released you allowing you to drop to your knees in a sobbing mess. 

“You think I wouldn’t know what you were up to? This is my island. Everyone and everything on it belongs to me. You think you can save a couple of lousy villagers and I wouldn’t know?”

Nami warned you. She’d told you time and again that it hadn’t been a good idea. You’d thought she was just being ridiculous. You didn’t know how Arlong had found out, but at this point it didn’t matter. The damage was done and your punishment for that betrayal was well into effect. 

His face was decorated in your blood as he spit down at you. His gaze and arms wide as he took in his devoted followers that waited for his next commands. 

“We all know the truth of this world. Fishmen are the rightful rulers of the seas. And the humans know it too. They fear our power, so they bound us with chains. They loathe our presence, so they banned us from their cities.” 

Arlong walked the stage with the presence of a false prophet. He brought up the past and weaved the narrative of those errors, those transgressions, with each false fact. He played on their fear of being enslaved again to drive their fear into something vile and twisted. Something that burned with its own prejudice and demanded penance be paid for with blood and pain. 

“But we broke those chains, huh? Built our own cities. Now the time has come to restore the natural order of this world.”

In unison, all the fishmen shouted. How could they not see that remaking the world with more hate was never the answer? Arlong touched a few of his crew as he circled back to join you on his stage. 

“For centuries, humans have used us, kept us down. And our so-called leaders, they allowed it. Banners of unity and peace they so lovingly wave are, in truth, flags of surrender, willing defeat. I don’t know about you, but I ain’t surrendering.”

“Kill them all!”

Kill who- “No.”

You don’t know why it didn’t hit you until now. The torches they carried. The guns and swords at the ready in some of their hands. They were going out to attack Coco village - to kill the people that resided inside. 

Chew rushed forward and kicked you. His boot collided with your jaw and sent your body crumbling to the floor. 

“We are the embodiment of fishman superiority! And with the Grand Line map, we will reclaim our birthright. Our righteous rage will burn through Coco Village, to the ends of the East Blue, and as we move to the Grand Line and beyond, we will teach each and every human their rightful place, beneath us!”

To drive his point home, Arlong walked over to your fallen figure and placed his foot on your back. He pressed down violently causing you to scream again as he placed more of his weight against your spine. 

“Beneath us!”

“Yeah!”

“Beneath us!”

They shouted. They chanted until a chorus of their hatred rang out across the trees. You wondered if the villagers could hear the sound of their impending doom. If any of them would make it out alive. When he was finished, Arlong removed his foot from you and waited for Kuroobi to join him on the stage. 

“Go and destroy the village. Murder anyone you see. And Kuroobi - bring me back the human child she gave the medicine to.”

An icy shot of dread jolted down your spine. All the abuse they’d given you erased itself from memory as you struggled to get to your feet. Not Nazifa. 

“No! Don’t you touch her!”

Arlong rushed over to strike you and sent you flying back. The taste of chopper rushed fresh into your mouth even before your body landed against a pillar.

“Nami will pay for her treachery, and so will you. I’ll teach you both a thing or two about loyalty.” With a nod of his head, two fishmen rushed forward to grab a hold of you and lifted you up to your feet. “First, let’s get you ready for our little friend’s arrival. She should have you welcome her with arms wide open.”

Arlong’s rotten laughter putrefied the space. His arms open and mocking as you feel the first cold press of the chains being wrapped around your wrists. 

As always, thank you so much for reading! Comments, likes, and reblogs are always appreciated.

Tag list: @zaphira-san @imasimplol @honeymoonheartz @nadlx33333 @ye0nvibezzn @that-girl-named-alex @hahismyname @inkpot-winters @asterizee @haitani-22 @mysicallai @targaryenhoolahoop @moonsficrec

@mizzy-pop@atinymonbebestay@notahappystan@secretdazeobservation@howlerwolfmax@inkthgoat

@violetmatcha@justacornerofmybrain@ninablue@depressed-but-make-it-cute@jamieeboulos@sanemishina@thegreatesttttttttt@katiemrty@sorasolarium@ponyboys-sunsets@flowersgirl02@spilled-coffee-cup@instabull@charleslec-airlines@dixonsbugaboo@amanda08319@moony-artemis@iloveautumn1

@yoheyyosup@ghostyycat7@csmbrainrot@selmasemlan@yeetedandoboi@snixx2088@sourairi@nerdiestmothman21@swthxrry@throwmethroughawindow@heyitz-julia@sabrinadelreyy@illusory-segurity@naomihatake@mrs–imperfect

@shabzy1644@fckwritersblock@glaciuswduo@meri-soni-meri-tamanna@fangeekkk@tfamidoingwithmylife@zaphira-san@kieth-reblogging@alotofrandomfangirling@emelia07@kagatinkita@sarcastic-sourwolf@humblereaper21@frankenstein852

@hopefulrascalstatesmantoad@kaykay0315@geminidas

@carlitosainzz@shuujin@blossomedfloweroflove@inescase@melsunshine@sydneybowbidney@smoochesfromlevi@xash707@ren-ni@katt58@erikathewillow@hhighkey@tofueater78@quixscentsposts@fnlyroe@pinkiemme@yeonieesss@taeriffic@emogirl5550@bangtannie7@chermonroe@kagehinaismysin@boofy1998@lovelessprick@schniti-is-in-the-house@elayne321 @blobfishyy @lynnieereads @planetstars-blog@hydr0citi @zerosmilesahead @yoong1core @asteroidshowers @yunho-leeknow @hiitsmoon@sweetstella @fairygirl18 @shiiiii-okayyyy

*Please let me know if the tags are not working.

---