Like I Have Never Seen A Gag Funnier Than This That I Can Recall

like i have never seen a gag funnier than this that i can recall

I wish kinky sex ed wasn't so stigmatized even among left-leaning "sex positive" circles. Everyone's all "uwu I'm a sub I'll do anything you ask" okay mommy wants you to read The New Bottoming Book so you learn how to sub without hurting yourself since your sex ed up to this point is porn and your ex boyfriend Jared who liked to choke you incorrectly

every time i see discourse about pedohysteria amidst a trans genocide i think about that news article from 2016 about the mexican immigrant who voted for trump because trump said he’d get rid of all the “bad hombres” from mexico, only to be deported himself because it turns out what trump was really saying was that he wanted to deport all mexicans, not just “the bad ones”

not just him, but there were many other examples too, like white conservatives who have mexican immigrant friends and family or people in the community important to them who were mexican immigrants, and they voted for trump because they thought trump was just getting rid of “criminals”, and then they regret it when their families and communities get torn apart by deportations of their spouses, their friends, their favourite restaurant owners, etc.

anyways, i hope young queers, trans people esp, understand that when conservatives talk about “pedophiles” and “groomers”, they’re not talking about actual child abusers, they’re talking about all queer people. they’re talking about all trans people. it’s why in florida, they’re categorizing “drag” as a child sex crime, and making sex crimes against children punishable by death. they’re trying to execute every single trans person, and that’s just the rhetoric they’re using

so stop buying into the pedohysteria. it’s easy to think “well, i’m not a pedophile, so i’ll be safe” when you don’t realize that in the eyes of conservatives, every single queer person is a pedophile and deserves death, and contributing to their rhetoric by trying to figure out which trans woman is a pedophile is just accelerating your own march to the gallows

Some tips for spoonies who have sex questions but cant talk about them

If your hips dislocate often, being on top might be better, or reverse cowgirl. I found that position in particular works for me. Thigh grinding and clit stimulation tend to be less energy than actual intercourse if you have a vagina.

If youre into any bondage and have EDS/any tissue disease please dont use duct tape its hell on earth for the skin. Try the fuzzy handcuffs or ribbons, silky fabrics can be just as much fun and less pain than sticky or rough textures

Yes being hypersexual is normal if you have chronic pain or chronic fatigue as its normal human response to get out of pain and into pleasure, it alsp can push an adrenaline rush and give sudden energy.

Yes being sex repulsed is natural if you have chronic pain/fatigue because sex can be exhausting, and more painful. And even if it feels good, it can be really bad afterwards going from pleasure to pain.

Dislocation or pulled muscles are common, heat or a bath afterwards can be really helpful.

Dont forget to pee after sex its like ten times as likely for people with low immune systems to get utis than healthy people.

If youre into anal and are likely to have prolapses please be super careful and start training yourself beforehand, and be slow about it.

If your skin is stretchy or tears easily please because during intercourse and especially nipple play.

If you have devices/tubes on you/in you be sure not to put a whole lot of pressure on them. Stop if somethibg doesnt feel right. If you do bondage make sure your tube doesnt get tied up with you.

Being sex repulsed and hypersexual us really normal especially if youre on medications.

Yes, anti depressants, painkillers and especially anti psychotics can make it nearly impossible to orgasm. Dont feel guilty about it, its just how it is. Lots of foreplay and edging can help but for many it takes getting off the med to get your sex life back/achieve orgasm.

Back spasms can and will happen! For regardless of sex/gender, if you orgasm, your muscles get tight and excited and it can cause spasms in the legs and especially your back! Be careful.

If you have a vagina and have any tissue disease, its usually easily to tear tissue in both the anus and the vagina, make sure you are lube up as much as possible before any insertion. And if tearing still happens make a note of it and talk to your doctor if it doesnt heal.

If you bruise easily, youll get hickeys easily, and if you heal slow those motherfuckers do too.

Its fun when youre flexible, but make sure youre not hyper extending during sex, because that could make you extra likely to have a dislocation.

Yes, jaw dislocations while sucking dick are super common, lock jaw and jaw weakness are too. Dont be ashamed to stop. Its a lot of energy and a lot of work and movement your neck/jaw might not be used to. Ice packs work best after a long day of suckin dick.

Premature ejaculation is also common for a lot of spoonies (especially spoonies with penises) due to the sudden rush of adrenaline/pleassure and extreme sensitivity. Dont be ashamed!

Yes, your meds can make it hard to.maintain na erection, talk to your doctor about what to do, but dont be ashamed, its super common especially on anti depressants.

Its common for people with chronic illnesses to have a hard time staying wet/maintaining an erection during sex as youre basically battling both fatigue and pain, try foreplay and other things outside of penetration before going straight for intercourse.

No ones gonna tell you this but people with inflammatory dieases, your vagina will inflame during penetration, it may hurt, you may not feel it, thats why you should start slow.

If you have unique allergies please please for the love of god make sure you dont have a latex allergy or an allergy ro certain lubricates, condoms can be the worst for those of us with bad immune systems/unique allergies.

Be prepared for wrist and shoulder dislocations during handjobs/fingering.

Theyre not gonna yell you this but fingering and handjob can advance your arthritis/give you early arthritis. Please take breaks when you feel pain.

All i have for now. Will be adding more.

No you cannot fix your entire life at 2am. Go to bed.

if you are anti-ao3, you are pro-censorship

if you believe archive of our own needs to be shut down, you support active censorship

ao3 was created during a time when corporations were trying to actively capitalize on fan content. ao3 was created to circumvent the encroaching censorship in the fanfiction community. and this is not just censorship in the form of limiting mature content: authors were barred from writing for certain fandoms. authors were prohibited from using certain formatting decisions in their writing. authors weren’t able to moderate comments on their own works. authors were not able to properly tag and provide accurate trigger warnings for their works in ways that were easily accessible to readers.

archive of our own provided so much for the fan community, and continues to provide a valuable space for writers and fans alike. it is invaluable. fans deserve spaces free of trivial censorship and free of corporate presence. fans deserve ao3.