02.06.22

02.06.22

“What is this life if, full of care, / We have no time to stand and stare.” —W. H. Davies

Forgot to post this yesterday. I ate a whole pound of cherries, along with an empanada and a pastel Vasco. Right now, I’m enjoying a rainstorm and sunshine from my bedroom.

14.05.22

“Summer afternoon — summer afternoon; to me those have always been the two most beautiful words in the English language.” —Henry James

A relaxing day spent practicing my Spanish, exploring the city, and eating good food. I got to see some traditional Basque folk dancing downtown as well, though I was without a doubt more focused on the food.

18.06.22

“I have perceiv’d that to be with those I like is enough, / To stop in company with the rest at evening is enough, / To be surrounded by beautiful, curious, breathing, laughing flesh is enough, / To pass among them, or touch any one, or rest my arm ever so lightly round his or her neck for a moment—what is this, then? / I do not ask any more delight—I swim in it, as in a sea.” —Walt Whitman

I’m in France now, and I’m with people I love. Despite being at the apex of irritability, I relax and invite my soul.

fucking hate it when the stuff everybody says "actually works" does actually work.

hate exercising and realizing i've let go of a lot of anxiety and anger because i've overturned my fight-or-flight response.

hate eating right and eating enough and eating 3 times a day and realizing i'm less anxious and i have more energy

hate journaling in my stupid notebook with my stupid bic ballpoint and realizing that i've actually started healing about something once i'm able to externalize it

hate forgiving myself hate complimenting myself more often hate treating myself with kindness hate taking a gratitude inventory hate having patience hate talking to myself gently

hate turning my little face up to the sun and taking deep breaths and looking at nature and grounding myself and realizing that i feel less burdened and more hopeful, more actually-here, that i am able to see the good sides of myself more clearly, that i am able to see not only how far i have to grow - but also how much growth i have already done & how much of my life i truly fill with light and laughter and love

horrible horrible horrible. hate it but i'm gonna do it tho

Titsayy