floatybug

i am not here to be perceived

Personal blog/diary • random thoughs go here•they/them• statistically most xenogenders don’t know they’re xenogender but luckily I have the knowledge •pan

785 posts

Nobody Asked Me My Headcanons On Bill's Weird Alien Shape Gender But That's Only Because You Didn't Know

nobody asked me my headcanons on Bill's weird alien shape gender but that's only because you didn't know you wanted to know

Panel one: captioned "Age 2." Drawing of a very small Bill Cipher with tiny chubby limbs, an enormous shiny eye, and youthful innocence. He's saying, "I'm a trangle. An equilatalal tringle. The cutest troingle."
Panel two: captioned "Age 14." Bill Cipher, looking older but still with a slight youthful features (shiny eye, mildly rounded corners, thicker limbs) with his hands on his "hips" glancing off to the side defensively. He's saying, "The doc said I'm psychic because I can bend into the third dimension because I have... WEIRD geometry. So if equilateral and scalene and isosceles are separate sub-genders, is 'psychic' a sub-gender? I feel like being psychic is a gender role. I'll fight you about it."
Panel three: captioned "Age 1,000,000,00..." Bill, now fully adult, wearing a bow tie, glowing, and floating in a blue void, looks deep in thought and a bit perturbed. He's thinking, "I think I feel like I'm. like. Slightly square too. I wouldn't call myself a square, if I had to pick one thing it would be triangle, I'm never NOT a triangle. But there's somethiiiinng squareish here. Like a full plate of triangle with a side dish of square. Simultaneously. I can't tell people this, being a triangle is my whole thing. Kryptos would be sooooo annoying about it if I said I feel slightly quadrilateral. What does it mean. How do you be a square in a triangular way. Or triangular in a square way?? I don't even know what I'm talking about. I should have talked—"
Panel four A: captioned "2500 BCE". Screenshot (now colored) from Gravity Falls of a (presumably Egyptian) pyramid sitting in the sand under the sun. Panel four B: close up on Bill, his eye turned into an exclamation point, hands raised in excitement, shouting "HOLY SH—" Panel four C: Bill, now with his typical brick-line pattern on the bottom half of his body, with his fists raised in the air and his feet kicked out chanting "BRICKS BRICKS BRICKS BRICKS".
Panel five: captioned "2012". Screenshot from Gravity Falls of Bill depicted as a multi-tiered six-armed glowing-eyed black-bricked neon-grout pyramid floating in front of the interdimensional rift, with large text scrawled behind him saying "GENDER EUPHORIA". Second caption: "And then he died."

of course he has gold bricks and pronouns

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gravity falls oh my god that is prrfect

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