Dealing With The Worst Case Scenario

dealing with the worst case scenario

your condom breaks

you feel a lump on your breast

your friends are ignoring you

you’re stranded on an island 

you got rejected by a crush

you get into a car accident

you got stung by a bee/wasp

you got fired from your job

you’re in an earthquake

your tattoo gets infected

your house is on fire

you’re lost in the woods

you get arrested abroad

you get robbed

your partner cheated on you

you’re on a ship that’s sinking

you fall into ice

you’re stuck in an elevator

you hit a deer with your car

you have food poisoning

your pet passed away

you fall off of a horse

you or your friend has alcohol poisoning

you have toxic shock syndrome

your house has a gas leak

Headcanon for bros' morning routines?

The Brothers and Their Morning Routine 🌅

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Lucifer

Despite how nice it is to wake up before the others, Lucifer isn't a morning person. But the call of duty doesn't offer him the luxury of sleeping in very often. Between Diavolo and his brothers, there's a lot he needs to prepare for.

Diavolo also likes to call for a chat first thing in the morning, so he naturally wakes up early. He's told the Demon Prince A THOUSAND TIMES to stop calling like that, but Diavolo insists that he likes "hearing his morning voice". It's annoying..

But Lucifer takes his morning prep slowly, brewing a cup of coffee for himself before he does anything else. He'll slowly drink it while reading the RAD newspaper. It's like a little slice of paradise, having the chance to relax.

And once that's finished, he washes up and brushes his teeth, making sure everything about his appearance is perfect before he dares to show himself.

He'll also take a bit of time to look over the work he has to do, maybe even taking a few papers down to the table with him. Now all he had to do was prepare his nerves for whatever shenanigans his brothers subjected him to for the day, and the headache that was bound to come from it.

Mammon

Mammon moves a lot in his sleep, so he's usually all tangled up in his bedsheets if he hasn't kicked them away completely. And there's the rare occurrence where he just falls out of bed-

Kinda sloppy, but who's graceful first thing in the morning? He peels himself out of bed yawning and scratching his stomach while he stumbles off to the bathroom.

He might not be as vain as Asmo, but he cares about his looks, too. A quick shower and a little bit of styling for his hair, and he'll be ready! Oh yeah, he's gotta brush his teeth too. Wait... he forgot to buy toothpaste!

It's probably fine.. He'll just borrow some of Levi's. It's not like he'll know. And some of his mouthwash, too. Maybe his hairbrush, since it's just laying there?

He either takes forever to get ready, or he's done at the speed of light. Either way, he's in a hurry to get down for breakfast because he knows Beel's got an eye for his plate! And he's gotta head out soon anyway. There's money to be made!

Levi

Not much of a morning person himself, but every morning is a blessing when he gets to wake up with his lovely Ruri-chan dakimakura in his arms 💕💕

That aside, he starts his day by giving Henry his breakfast. Only the best for his best friend! Then he'll check a couple of gaming forums for the latest news, and bases the day's schedule around that.

He's not really in a rush to get ready if it's not a school day. He's got plenty of snacks in his room in case Beel eats his breakfast, and he can always order something through DevilDash.

But still, he wants to freshen up a bit so he'll go for a shower, and brushes his teeth. Wait.. was there always so little toothpaste? He swore he just bought a tube last week! Well, whatever.

If he chooses to eat with everyone else (or Lucifer forces him to), he's always in a hurry. He's wasting so much time! The schedule of an otaku isn't one that should be taken lightly! Do you know how much level grinding he could be doing right now?!

Satan

Satan has a tendency to pull all-nighters when he just can't bring himself to put a book down, so he usually looks ROUGH. I'm talking messy hair, bags under his eyes, looking like he just got beat up by his bed.

And he's not a morning person despite usually waking up the earliest, so it's best not to make eye contact until after he's finished getting ready. He's stomping around, irritably making his bed and getting his clothes ready for the day.

But after he's showered and gotten dressed, his mood has significantly improved. And since it's still early, he has time to brew some peppermint tea and read a book by the window.

It's nice to wake up before everyone else, so he can have some peace and quiet before the idiocy begins.

But the quiet also gives him a chance to consider the day's schedule. What new prank could he harass Lucifer with today? He’d been looking into cursing Lucifer's coffee mug, so whatever liquid was poured into it would turn into vinegar. Maybe he should try it out?

Asmo

When he wakes up, he removes his silk eye mask and pulls the scrunchy out of his hair, blinking away the sleep from his eyes. What, you thought he woke up like a Disney princess? That's only when he's got company, love ❤️

Asmo's got the world's longest morning routine. He draws a bath and pours in some oils to help invigorate him and wake him up. Slathers on a green tea and mint face mask, pops on the cucumbers, and lets the water soothe away his worries ~

Until Mammon bangs on his door to shout that "Lucifer says to hurry it up!" So annoying! Don't they know it takes careful preparation to take care of so much perfection??

Still, he doesn't want Beel to eat his breakfast, so he's gotta speed it up. He's used to getting ready in a pinch, even if he's not happy about it

Carefully picks out is outfits for the day while he lets the curlers in his hair do their job, and viola! Now he's ready to grace his family with his lovely presence! If you wanna take pictures, make sure you get his good side. Who's he kidding, EVERY side is his good side!

Beel

He wakes up disappointed sometimes, usually because he was just enjoying a wonderful dream about eating a mountain of delicious food!

....Only to pull the remains of his half-eaten pillow out of his mouth. What a waste... that endless pancake stack was heavenly...But there's no time to mope around. The sooner he gets up, the sooner he can get downstairs for breakfast.

He starts his morning by taking a shower while holding back the urge to eat the bar of soap he's using. Beel specifically makes sure he doesn't choose anything that smells TOO good, or he'll give in and gobble it up.

Brushes his teeth as well as he can so his food will taste twice as good! After that is usually when he goes to wake Belphie up, dragging his twin into the bathroom so he can help him dry his hair once he's done showering.

He can't eat well without Belphie, so he makes sure he's all cleaned up and ready for breakfast before he goes down, carrying his brother if he has to. Ah, and he should probably head out later to buy another pillow.

Belphie

Haha. "Morning" routine. I think you mean "noon or later" routine. That is, when Beel lets him sleep in. Otherwise he's being woken up and carried off to the bathroom, where he's forced to take a shower against his will...

And he takes LONG showers. Mostly because the warm water lulls him right back to sleep... while he's standing up. Isn't that a little dangerous?

Once he's out, he leaves it to Beel to dry his hair while he lazily brushes his teeth. Isn't all this morning care a little excessive? Who's even this energetic first thing in the morning? What a pain...

Doesn't even bother to make his bed. He'll be back in it in a few minutes anyway, so there's no point. He coaxes Beel into carrying him down the stairs (which Lucifer scolds them both for) and tries his best to keep his eyes open for breakfast.

Those pancakes... aren't they TOO fluffy looking? Almost like a pillow.... ah..goodnight...

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