Has Anyone Done This With Them Yet

has anyone done this with them yet

based on Tendou's few lines in the Dumpster Battle Movie we can deduce that he has a habit of, maybe as a joke, "talking to camera" or pretending to break the fourth wall, maybe just to entertain himself.

I imagine this is a bit of an annoyance for the team, who don't find it funny.

I also imagine they were all properly irritated when Ushijima started inexplicably playing along and they simply cannot figure out why he's also doing it.

---

Tendou, over his shoulder, to the "camera": did you see that? these people are ridiculous, gonna go crazy if I'm stuck with them any longer.

Ushijima, also glancing over to Tendou's camera: ignore him. he is just being dramatic.

Tendou, still to the camera: don't you dare ignore me! I'm your leading man! Youre reliable narrator!

The rest of the locker room, silent:

Semi: the depths of which i despise these two

Leon: relax they're just doing a bit

Semi: i don't know if they are, Leon

Goshiki: well I think it's funny!

Shirabu: you don't think it's funny, you're just a kissass

Yamagata, whipping his head around trying to spot the camera:

Tendou, giving a wink to the camera: Well, whether you ignore me or not, I have to get to practice. Catch you later~

Semi: stop pretending to break the fourth wall!

Ushijima, waving goodbye to the camera before following Tendou:

Semi: s t o p

Yamagata, still looking for the camera:

I have this idea so clear in my head of an SakuAtsu / UshiTen fic in which Tendou and Atsumu accidentally stumble into a friends-with-benefits relationship after Ushijima and Sakusa announce their relationship.

It’s done following an Adlers-MSBY game and Atsumu puts on a happy face but leaves at the first opportunity to drown his sorrows in liquor in a bar where he doesn’t have to be surrounded by his congratulatory teammates and well wishes to the new couple.

Two drinks in, the stranger next to him swivels in his chair to face him with a commiseratory expression and says he recognizes a broken hearted stranger and let him buy him a drink.

Atsumu tries to wave off the guy, wanting to wallow alone, but the guy doesn’t seem care and buys him a drink anyway.

The man introduces himself as Satori, a name that tickles Atsumu memory but he ignores it. He has the glazed eyes of someone who has already had a fair share of liquor and rocks in his chair as he waxes poetic about how he flew out all the way from Paris to finally confess his feelings to his best friend from high school, only to show up at the bar his friend was celebrating at to find him celebrating his new relationship. He slipped out without a word, not wanting to ruin the mood with his broken heart.

It’s around their third shared drink that Atsumu reciprocates the gesture. Because hell, he’s drunk and heartbroken and this man is also drunk and heartbroken and maybe he just wants someone to listen. So he talks about Sakusa. His stupid hair and his stupid hand sanitizer and his stupidly flexible body and his stupidly handsome face and his stupid gloating smile when he wins and the stupid way he’s a germaphobe but still brings him medicine when he’s sick and all the things that made Atsumu fall stupidly in love with him, and now he’s stuck heartbroken bc the guy he’s in love with is now dating his high school crush and they’re probably gonna get married and have a stupidly beautiful wedding and live happily ever after.

And Satori listens to him and pats his back consolingly and suddenly Atsumu is kissing him because, fuck it, they’re both drunk and lonely and Sakusa is probably back at Ushijima’s place so why shouldn’t he have a little fun?

There’s hands and teeth and tongues, and the two of them somehow make it back to Atsumu’s room at the MYSB dorms and the rest of the night is a bit of a blur.

When Atsumu wakes up the next morning with a pounding hangover, to a surprised yelp from his door.

“Tendou-san! What are you doing in Atsumu’s room?”

Standing at the door with a bottle of aspirin and a bottle of water, is Hinata, slack-jawed and looking between Satori and Atsumu, and suddenly, the synapses in his brain that had been bogged down by liquor last night, start firing.

The redhead looks between Hinata and Atsumu. His expression in clear confusion, trying to figure out how Hinata is here, but Atsumu is already well aware who the red head standing in his boxers is.

Satori. Tendou Satori.

Tendou Satori who was the middle blocker and famous Guess Monster of Shiratorizawa.

Tendou Satori who is Ushijima Wakatoshi’s best friend who lives in Paris.

Sakusa is going to kill him.

Thus begins a comedy of errors in which Tendou and Atsumu try and disguise the fact that they’ve slept together from their respective unrequited loves, all the while Ushijima and Sakusa’s relationship grows tense as they both find growing discomfort in Atsumu and Tendou’s perceived closeness.

those goddamn growth spurts 🌱💢

LOOK AT HOW THE HAIKYUU COVER ART HAS CHANGED OVER THE YEARS IM GONNA BE SICK THEYVE GROWN RIGHT BEFORE MY VERY EYES

I'm here now