* .

🐝  *  ―  𝑭𝑶𝑹𝑻𝒀 𝑹𝑨𝑵𝑫𝑶𝑴 𝑸𝑼𝑬𝑺𝑻𝑰𝑶𝑵𝑺.

❛  are you always so competitive?  ❜ ❛  are you okay? are you hurt?  ❜ ❛  are you sure you can do this on your own?  ❜ ❛  are you thinking what i'm thinking?  ❜ ❛  can you go take care of this, please?  ❜ ❛  can you show me how to fight?  ❜ ❛  can you tell me more about your adventures?  ❜ ❛  do you believe in ghosts?  ❜ ❛  do you ever think about anyone other than yourself?  ❜ ❛  does it really have to be like this?  ❜ ❛  don't you think you've already done enough damage for one day?  ❜ ❛  has no one ever given you a compliment before?  ❜ ❛  have i ever told you how beautiful you look in the glow of the moonlight?  ❜ ❛  have you noticed anything different about me lately?  ❜ ❛  haven't you ever wondered why i never talk about my childhood?  ❜ ❛  how can you just go to sleep like nothing happened?  ❜ ❛  how many more people have to suffer before you realize your madness?  ❜ ❛  is there anything else i can do for you?  ❜ ❛  is this really how you want this to end?  ❜ ❛  isn't it ironic?  ❜ ❛  what are your plans for today?  ❜ ❛  what else do you want me to say?  ❜ ❛  what else have you hidden from me?  ❜ ❛  what happened here? where is all that smoke coming from?  ❜ ❛  what has happened in your life that made you like this?  ❜ ❛  when were you going to tell me?  ❜ ❛  where are we supposed to go from here?  ❜ ❛  who will be able to stop them now?  ❜ ❛  why can't you just act like a normal person?  ❜ ❛  why can't you just leave me alone?  ❜ ❛  why can't you just stay focused?  ❜ ❛  why does everything always have to be so complicated?  ❜ ❛  why should i believe you now when you've told nothing but lies?  ❜ ❛  why won't you just tell me what i did wrong?  ❜ ❛  will it ever stop hurting so much?  ❜ ❛  will you go out on a date with me?  ❜ ❛  will you just shut up and kiss me already?  ❜ ❛  will you please text me when you get home safely?  ❜ ❛  you're completely out of your element here, aren't you?  ❜

.

Just thinking about how Murphy was the only one able calm himself during the eclipse.

THE HALLS OF THE ARK were eerie, haunted by memories of what now felt like a lifetime ago and illuminated in a dreary fluorescence. the past pricked at murphy's nerves, and for a moment, the thought of the lighthouse bunker crossed his mind. he'd die of starvation eventually, sure . . . but could it have been better than this god - forsaken place ?

there's a damp rag in his dry hands, and murphy takes a step toward the window. a soft, relenting scoff rolls off his lips at her remark, and murphy knows the feeling. hell, he'd probably say the same.

i should've gone down fighting, she says. there's a soft silence that hangs between the two for a moment, eyes still on the sight of the earth now engulfed in flames. again. their lives and everything they'd dreamed of . . . fought for.

" why ? " he asks, gaze shifting to the girl warrior beside him. " so you can be dead, too ? " he shakes his head, looking back to the irradiated planet. he agreed, jaha didn't deserve to live . . . not after alie, and certainly not after casting them out. again.

" 've got nothing but time now . . . " he trails. " give it five years and we'll be back. " attention shifts back down to the rag. then to octavia. " you'll get your revenge. " and of that, he had no doubt.

" for now, though, you need to take off that spacesuit. " he tries again. he hadn't been through nearly what the other had, and even his body was aching. " c'mon octavia, you were in the rain. in battle. not like that thing's comfy anyway. "

@hevives asked: i can’t help you if you won’t let me .

" I don't need anyone's help. " Octavia’s utterance, razor - rough in the back of her mouth and thick with exhaustion, almost fell flat against the unrelenting whir of alpha station's abused hydraulics and air scrubbers.  Sounds she'd never thought, in a hundred years, she'd hear again after so long on the ground.

In the aftermath of their struggle up into space, she could hardly shield from Murphy the truth. That she hurt. That, under the thin carapace of her spacesuit, her skin chafed with fresh radiation burns and cuts and deep, aching bruises: all markers of the ill fated conclave, of a lengthy and unforgiving war — of wounds garnered in a battle of honor that Jaha's deceit had dashed in a moment of selfishness, and rendered utterly futile.

No abundance of still - shining stars outside the airlock or clean, repurposed air could pull her from the memory of the sound Roan had made when he'd drowned. Couldn't block out the thought of Indra, down there in the crypt of the first commander, awaiting a certain death she could've saved her from.

Jaha deserved her sword as much as Pike had.

" I never thought we'd be back here, " she breathed, gaze trained on the curve of the Earth down below, instead of on Murphy's. " I could have stopped Jaha. I should have gone down fighting. "

Are you a “can’t write dialogue” writer or a “can’t describe anything” writer

❛  why should i believe you now when you've told nothing but lies?  ❜ from @waldenstationed !

MURPHY HAD BEEN TO HELL , had felt what waits for him on the other side. it was pure desperation & fear that lead him along the path to immortality . . . one that left him worse off than before, leaving a path of betrayal in his wake.

raven was right; if hell was what he wanted to avoid, the answer was morality, not immortality. and now he had to help clean up their mess . . . maintain peace. the road out of hell was long, and murphy was just beginning.

there's a flash of guilt in murphy's eyes and a tension that settles in his jaw. ❛ i didn't know, ❜ he says. he still sees abby when he closes his eyes . . . the guilt a knife in his gut. ignorance didn't matter now, though. the truth of the matter was: he'd gotten her killed. just like his own father.

❛ i'm sorry. ❜ murphy breathes. ❛ believe me or don't . . . but i'm sorry, helo. ❜