NEED HELP EDITING?

NEED HELP EDITING?

EDITING AND PROOFREADING SERVICES

ESSAYS,RESEARCH PAPER, THESIS, COVER LETTERS, RESUMES, PERSONAL STATEMENTS, BOOKS, SCRIPTS, SCREENPLAYS

EXPERIENCED  WRITER AND EDITOR 

TWO MASTERS DEGREES

LONDON SCHOOL OF ECONOMICS AND POLITICAL SCIENCE AND UNIVERSITY OF SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA

FOR MORE INFORMATION, CONTACT:

kairoseditingservices@gmail.com 

dealing with the worst case scenario

your condom breaks

you feel a lump on your breast

your friends are ignoring you

you’re stranded on an island 

you got rejected by a crush

you get into a car accident

you got stung by a bee/wasp

you got fired from your job

you’re in an earthquake

your tattoo gets infected

your house is on fire

you’re lost in the woods

you get arrested abroad

you get robbed

your partner cheated on you

you’re on a ship that’s sinking

you fall into ice

you’re stuck in an elevator

you hit a deer with your car

you have food poisoning

your pet passed away

you fall off of a horse

you or your friend has alcohol poisoning

you have toxic shock syndrome

your house has a gas leak

NEED HELP EDITING?

EDITING AND PROOFREADING SERVICES

ESSAYS,RESEARCH PAPER, THESIS, COVER LETTERS, RESUMES, PERSONAL STATEMENTS, BOOKS, SCRIPTS, SCREENPLAYS

EXPERIENCED  WRITER AND EDITOR 

TWO MASTERS DEGREES

LONDON SCHOOL OF ECONOMICS AND POLITICAL SCIENCE AND UNIVERSITY OF SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA

FOR MORE INFORMATION, CONTACT:

kairoseditingservices@gmail.com 

So Tired.

So Tired. Part 1

Warnings: Angst, but Happy Ending is on its way.

Tip: Just imagine that this is Harry’s reaction to your last sentence. (MY   FEELINGS)

Plot: You join Harry on tour but he seems to have other prirorities.

“Don’t say such things. You know I never would, I love you.” He whispered, trying to get close to you and taking your hand. It broke him that you really thought that bad about him.”

“No, you don’t. And it doesn’t matter”

Two weeks. It’s been two weeks since Harry has stopped talking to you. You had no idea why. The last month was stressful for him, you understand it totally. You have been travelling with Harry for his tour around Europe, trying to support him and to spend some time with him before he’s off to Australia. You saw what he must bear. Always giving his best to show his fans what they mean to him. With him leaving soon again, you two decided you both needed this month to spend as much time as possible with each other. YOU thought that touring with him would mean that Harry would clung to your side as always, being his clingy self. Touching you, caressing your shoulder, giving you little pecks from time to time when you were talking to Mitch or Sarah, hugging you from behind and whispering sweet nothings in your ear which always made you chuckle. You were so happy when you stepped onto plane with him for his show in Paris, but now you were devasted. He has shut you out since day one, giving you no chance to interact with him at all. In the morning he was up way before you, already working out in the hotel gym. The first few days you waited for him to return from his morning workout to grab some breakfast together, just to be disappointed by the fact that he already went with his band mates without telling you. You brushed it off back then, not letting it bother you. Harry has been a morning person for years, always being up too early for your liking. But as your day kept going this way, him doing stuff without you, not even caring where you were or with whom, you’ve got confused. As soon as you were at the venue, he was gone again. Whenever you stepped into his dressing room, hearing him laughing with Mitch and Adam he instantly stopped as soon as his eyes met yours, looking at the ground and leaving the room sooner or later. You just couldn’t make up your mind what was wrong with him, being so cold towards you, not even answering you in a proper way when you tried to put up a conversation. Just getting a “no” or a “yes” out of him. Everyone around you started to notice as well that something rubbed him the wrong way, which didn’t improve the situation either. You talked with Clare about it. You got close to her, loving her caring being and her attentive way. You enjoyed her company, though she couldn’t think of a reason for Harry’s strange behaviour. He never mentioned anything towards her. She even tried to broach the subject again, but he just brushed it off, switching the topic as soon as your name was mentioned. And even though this all was embarrassing for you, even humiliating to fight this whole passive aggressive thing Harry had with you in front of the whole tour stuff, the nights were way worse. You felt like a ghost, like he just looked through you, as if you were invisible. As soon as his concert was over, and you were rushed back to the hotel or to the next city, you just hurried behind Harry. Trying to keep up with his long legs sprinting. You felt like a little child, whose mother just dragged it along grocery shopping, always pulling on its hand. But when Harry and you stepped into your hotel room, it was unbearable. With no one around the silence felt even heavier on you shoulder. Every little noise seemed too loud and the tension was thicker than an iceberg. Harry jumped under the shower, while you changed into your night grown. Usually you would go into the bathroom as well, brushing your teeth, changing your clothes and chattering with Harry about his show, but this felt way too intimate these days. Harrys hasn’t seen you naked in weeks, not that you would have seen any of his skin either. You were used to the fact, that Harry slept in just his boxers, cuddling you close to his chest, where you laid your head down. Hearing his soothing heartbeat, while he ran his fingers through your hair and you traced his butterfly tattoo. This was your habit before you fell asleep. He calmed you down. Pressing little kisses on your head and assuring you how much he loved you. These moments were your Harry moments. You didn’t have to share him with anyone. It seemed like it was just the two of you and you slipped off to sleep with ease in his arms. You missed these times. Nowadays he laid down far away, his back facing you, not even touching you with his feet or toes, like he used to do. He once told you that he did that to show you that he was there, even when he needed space. Always making sure to assure you that he’d never leave your side. But this was yesterday, now he didn’t say a word, not even a good night. And so he fell asleep soon and you stayed awake with an aching heart. You could feel it breaking every night, while silent tears rolled out your closed eyes, slowly rocking you to sleep.

Today wasn’t any different, you woke up late at afternoon to an empty bed once more, feeling more than exhausted of this short night as you checked the time on your phone. You decided to get up and get ready to drive to the venue. As you arrived you didn’t even search or ask for Harry, knowing that he was in no mood to meet you anyway. You just sat down in Clare’s dressing room, pulling out your phone again and mindlessly scrolling through Instagram, while waiting for her to come back from soundcheck. You hummed along to the muffled sounds of Harry’s setlist as it suddenly hit you. You scrolled back up, unsure if this photo, you just skipped, really showed Harry. You stared blankly at the screen. No, it really was him. It really was Harry sitting at a nice Café dressed all in black with his white Adidas trainers, his longer curls pinned out of his forehead and sunglasses resting on his nose. It really was Harry sitting at a nice café with a blonde girl dressed in a short flower dress, laughing while touching Harrys arm. You knew her, you knew that Harry knew her, and it ate you alive. She was a so-called friend of him. Why he liked her, you had no idea. But you had an idea why you didn’t. She always was after Harry, wanting him since the day she met him. She was pretty and she used it in every possible way, she was just ruthless. Harry met her in LA a few weeks after you started dating and he told her instantly after her flirtatious attacks, that he indeed had a girlfriend. She just wasn’t bothered by it. She even drunkenly told one of your friends that one day she will get him into her bed and that you are just a phase until he realises that he deserves someone better, someone who fits him. Someone like her. You told Harry how bold she was to say all these nasty things about you to one of your best friends and how mean it was that she wouldn’t respect you in anyway. Harrys just listened and tried to calm you down by finding excuses for his friend’s behaviour and it was the first time you felt really hurt by Harry for not taking your side and not minimizing his friendship and contact with her. Over the time you just accepted her and hoped that she would leave your life sooner or later, you never saw her as a thread though. You trusted Harry and with the way he treated you, you were sure that he would never betray you in such a way. His soul was just too kind. But as you look down onto this picture of your boyfriend, looking so happy at this girl, gleaming at her, your trust was gone. You had no idea for how long you stared at this picture, while creating scenarios in your head which finally put all the pieces together. Maybe Harry was acting this strange because she really got into his pants, maybe she kept her drunken words and was right, that you were just a phase. A phase with which he had no guts to break up and so he just lets her drown in sadness while he is out, having fun with his affair. You felt how tears dwelled up in your eyes. You just couldn’t take it anymore, this was enough. You loved him so much, but you couldn’t keep up with all these things anymore. This really was betrayal, him going out and leaving you alone in the hotel room once again to go out and meet this menace, even if he didn’t cheat on you, this whole thing is wrong. He could have told you like before, but he decided against it. And so, you decided against staying here at the venue for any longer. Without telling anyone, you called a cab bringing you back to your hotel. Big tears were running down your cheeks by the time you went out the door and sat down in the cab.

You woke up by a loud thud of your room door closing. You slowly opened your puffy eyes. You haven’t really stopped crying since you arrived in your hotel room. But you were so exhausted from everything that happened the last few days that you fell asleep instantly as your heavy head touched the comfy and soothing hotel pillow, lulling you to sleep. The whole time you were alone in the hotel room, it was quiet. And to be honest you enjoyed it, it helped you sorting out your thoughts and helped you coming up with a decision. A decision you wanted to share so bad with Harry, you couldn’t keep it inside anymore. It gives you a feeling of sadness but also of relief. At least you didn’t feel numb anymore.

“Hi Harry” you tried to approach the conversation that you really needed to have and couldn’t wait any longer. You weren’t even sad that Harry hadn’t called you to ask why you haven’t been at his concert, you were used to it. It didn’t even bother you anymore that all his bandmates have asked you, being worried about you. Everyone but him. He didn’t even answer, just rested down and shuffled underneath his covers.

“Harry, did you hear me?” you tried once more, slowly sitting up on your side of the bed.

“Yeah, how couldn’t I?” he mumbled under his breath, rubbing his temples like your voice would give him migraine.

“We need to talk. Right now.”

“Y/N, are you serious? I’m tired. Let me sleep and let’s talk tomorrow.” he sighed.

“Well, talking to you seems a little difficult with you running away from me as soon as you open your eyes, right?

“Not now, Y/N” he hissed.

You stand up from your side of the bed, turning your body to him. “No Harry, this is the perfect moment. Because I can’t take it anymore. It’s always about you, but right now, It’s about me. Because I feel like shit, you treat me like shit. And I’m done with it. I’m done with you treating me like I don’t exist. So please tell me what I did, so we can move on from it. Just tell me.” You whisper screamed. Not even daring to raise your voice.

Harry moved around, standing up as well and really facing you since forever. But his stare was cold and there laid a fire within. But it wasn’t a good one, more of a dangerous one, which let you know that he wouldn’t explain himself or even tell you he’s sorry. No, he was ready to fight this down and you as well.

“So you’re really accusing me for being selfish while I’m on tour working from day to night. I’m very sorry that I can’t baby you like a little stupid child. You’re a grown-up woman. You can do things on your own. Stop being so damn clingy and touchy. It’s disgusting.” He hissed through gritted teeth.

You couldn’t believe your ears. Disgusting?! “This has nothing to do with me being clingy, Harry. It’s not normal to leave your girlfriend alone all the time in a hotel room. You brought me along, so we could spend some time together, but all you did was ignoring me.”

“Oh, excuse me, but as far as I can remember you were the one begging me to bring you along. I never wanted you to be here with me. This is my thing. I don’t expect you to drag me around your university as well, right? So why should I?”

“Are you even listening to yourself? You’ve been such an asshole and now you’re blaming me. I can’t believe it. Who are you even.”

You don’t even know what he answered to your statement. All you know is that he started to scream and shouted things at you while his head turned redder and redder. Tears were streaming down your face in nonstop and you were perplexed that you still had tears left. You sat down on your side of the bed, your back facing him, while he turned silent, heaving heavy from all the screaming he did.

“Have you finished?” your voice sliced through the deadly mood. He nodded which you couldn’t see, but he wasn’t able to raise his voice once more. You didn’t even expect an answer from him, you just wanted to tell him what you decided a few hours ago.

“Good, because I’m so tired. I’m so damn tired from this fighting, this day and from you. I’m so exhausted. I can’t sleep anymore. I can’t bear sleeping next to you, I cant bear seeing you. Looking at you made me once so happy, I couldn’t stop smiling. When I had a hard day at Uni, all I needed to do was to look at a picture of you and my mood was lightened. You were my rock.” You chuckled sarcastically, as you remembered the picture you had to see of him earlier today. “And now I feel sick. I see someone wearing your tour merch on the street and I feel so sick and sad, because all I see is your face and how you’ve looked at me recently. Stone cold. So cold. You didn’t even ask why I haven’t been at the venue today. You don’t care anymore and that’s alright, I guess.” You stopped talking and Harrys swore his already hurting throat just went narrower. Of course, he knew that you haven’t been there, but he asked his bandmates and they told him you didn’t feel well and left.

“Why have you left then?” he squeezed out through his tight throat.

“I saw it on Instagram. You’ve met Chelsea today and you looked so happy. So crazily happy and touchy. You didn’t even tell me that she was in town. Not like you were telling me a lot lately. But, you know, you left me this morning alone to meet up with her. With everything that has happened between us, this has hurt the most. I don’t know for how long you have been seeing her. I just want you to know that it’s okay. People fall in and out of love. I don’t even want to know for how long this thing between the two of you has been going on or even if there is a thing between you. You could have told me, but you didn’t have the guts to break it off with me before starting it with her. And that’s the biggest betrayal ever.”

Harry rushed over to you. “Y/N, don’t. Do you really think that I cheated on you? Do you want to tell me that you really think I would hurt you like this? I would never ever cheat on you. Don’t say such things. You know I never would, I love you.” He whispered, trying to get close to you and taking your hand. It broke him that you really thought that bad about him.

“No, you don’t. And it doesn’t matter. I just wanted to tell you that I’m going home. I already booked a flight for tomorrow. You don’t have to be concerned about paying for it. I already did.”

Harry heared you words through ringing ears and as soon as they reached his brain he tried to take your hand, but you flinched away and Harry swore he could feel his heart break.

“We can talk it through, you can’t leave me right now. You just can’t. I do love you and I did not cheat. Do you hear me? We have some problems, I do agree with that and I wasn’t fair with you. But we can make it. We always did, and we always will.” he stuttered while shaking his head no.

You didn’t even look at him as you stood up and closed your eyes while you kissed his cheek and saw his hands falling down lifeless onto his lap.

“Goodbye, Harry.”

A/N: This is only Part 1! I hope you enjoyed it. And leave me a message if you want. Please be kind, I havent proof read it yet. Lots of love and remember to Treat People with Kindness.