This Time I Drew This At My House

this time i drew this at my house

the Oni Yamaoka

I hate him as an enemy

But i love him as a Character, his story and motivations i found interesting

OMG I DIDN'T FINISH IT FUCK IT'S 2 AM

i didn't get problems with the skin color this round so... ta-daa!

4am, everyone sleeping

i got up to go to the bathroom and just when i got to the door i heard walking outside, as i was about to open it the walking stoped outside my door, I'm standing there, hand in the doorknob

i don't want to open it

I advice not reading if you don't like writen depictions of gore or severe body trauma and instestines.

If you do, you may go on...

Someone had captured me, had me prisoner, tortured me.

My stomach still hurts just from remembering it.

With a knife they opened my mouth, that wasn't a big deal for it did not hurt, but then with the same knife they opened my stomach, a huge deep horizontal line, that one really did hurt, but my main worry was my guts falling out, bursting out of my stomach as if it where springs we where talking about. Luckily they didn't.

While i suffered on the cold operation table i failed to see that my captor had gone away and someone else (also bloody and with cuts) hurried me to escape with them.

Just then did i notice that i was captive at my own house, just gloomy and bloody like my now mangled body.

I had a weird feeling in my stomach, like a pull towards the ground, so i went to the nearest mirror to see what was wrong, turns out that, unbeknown to me a "strand" of gut managed to slowly creep out of my sliced stomach and was almost touching the cold floor, i knew i couldn't run like that.

I had to put it back.

i can't even begin to explain the utterly gross feeling of grabing with both hands the slick, slimy surface of the own bloody gut and having to put it back inside your body, i didn't feel any pain though, just that dull numbness like having anesthesia but still being aware of your body.

I grabed it and as i started to place it back inside my body i could feel it moving around trying to find the space where it belonged.

.That's when i woke up.

I dreamt i had someone who loved me

Someone who loved me so purely, so sweetly and so just how i like it, that i loved him back

I'm mad at myself for not remembering his face, the only reminiscence i have is that he had curly locks, just the way i like it, i wish i could say what color they where, i just know it was a dark color, but, inside the "dark color" scheme, his hair could of been red, brown, dirty blonde or black, i guess I'll never know the true identity of my perfect boy.

It's a faint memory already, we where traveling, in a cruise maybe, when i try to reconnect to it i get the feeling of water, a vast ocean beneath us, and we where so happily in love, engulfed in one another's warmth, enraptured in the other's embrace and the feel of the wind.

I don't know where we departed, i just know that that future or alternate universe me was so happy and so in love with the person in her arms

that i wanted to be like her.

i want to be a strong woman™

but i don't want to eat healthy™ and workout™