Head Cannon Bc I Can - The Assassin's Belief In Spooky Stuff

Head cannon bc I can - The Assassin's belief in spooky stuff

A/N: In 3-month pre-honor of Spooky time (which is the best time) I'm gonna write a drabble about how I think certain assassin's would react to spooky stuff like ghosts, wendigos, vampires, etc. Thought it would be funny.

Ezio Auditore - He grew up religious so probably has that faith over fear mindset despite what he believes later on in life through being an assassin/meeting the garden tool known as juno (who doesn't get her name capitalized bc I don't like her lol). I mean exhibit A: This Florentine man just jumps off of a very high building and nails a superhero landing. The FAITH that this man had in his KNEECAPS to NOT SHATTER over the FEAR of his (very nice) legs snapping in half like pocky sticks. I mean COME.ONNNN. WILL LEGIT PERFORM AN EXORCISM IF HE GETS SPOOKED. He'll speak in Latin reciting Bible verses, he'll bust out the Holy Water and get the rosary, the whole shebang. He thinks that vampires are lowkey cheesy but is flattered when people think that he's one (because of the sexy factor around the bloodsuckers ya know) because they think he's HAWT. Wendigos freak him out because WHY DO THEY MOVE SO FAST?! He also does NOT mess with ouija boards and refuses to even be in the same room as one, cause the man's not trying to have the dang spirits of the borgias come after him again (cesare was annoying enough the first time, okay?). Werewolves? He's indifferent to. He likes dogs, he likes people (MOST of them), so long they don't bite him (too hard *wink wink*) that's all he cares about.

Altair Ibn La'Ahad - Vampires? Meh. They better stay away from him and his love or they'll get a fang omelet. Werewolves? So long as they don't have fleas or parasites, he doesn't see them as a problem. Altair does NOT believe in ghosts, and he is NOT amused when the others try to scare him and make him paranoid of the "other side" ooooo. He thinks it's all bullshlatta haha. However, when he's been smoking hashish...it's a different story. This cannabis product has a THC concentration of 5-15% so man is getting into the kite territory lol. He WILL get paranoid, and he WILL think that ghosts are on the front lawn PARTICULARLY the ghosts of French and English soldiers that he's fought. Will go get his love if she's there and pull her into his lap muttering in Arabic about "Stupid ghosts of the fallen. Not touching my woman." He'll beat Jacob's ass for moving the ouija board around and scaring the others but mostly because he didn't see Jacob, he just saw a big black blob coming at him and swung. He will also once again beat Jacob's ass for trying to scare him while pretending to be a ghost wrapped up in a bedsheet. Just picture him trying to strangle the poor top hat wearing British boy while Desmond and Evie try to talk him down and Altair's love gently tries to pry him off.

Love: (laughing softly as she pulls at his arms) Altair Habibi don't hurt him it was just a prank.

Altair: (yelling in Arabic) He's a ghost! I don't need any more of them in my life!

Desmond: Guys come on don't fight again.

Evie: (trying not to laugh) Uhh Mentor if you could kindly not strangle my dear brother to death, I would be grateful.

Ratonhnhake:ton/Connor Kenway - Being Native American he has been privy to myths and legends of mysterious beasts and malevolent spirits. The one that freaked him out the most as a little boy however was the myth about the wendigo. A myth that one if his tribe's elders had picked up from an Algonquian traveler passing through Boston. An insatiable beast created from humans and the hunger felt by them in desperate times with little to no food. He has heard multiple legends ranging from the spirit possessing those who are without food and influencing them to consume their fellow humans in cannibalistic practices, to the wendigo being a demon that possesses people for unknown reasons. How the beast is allegedly 15 feet tall, can wind walk, is extremely intelligent, and stores it's victims for food storage eating them at its leisure. But imo he's not afraid of them because think about. Connor vs a wendigo? I feel sorry for that wendigo lol. Man has fought bears, cougars, mountain lions, defied gravity, taken on an entire army and held up the middle finger to cannonballs meant to send him to his Maker. Requiescat In Pace to that wendigo haha. Vampires are lame to him he does not see the appeal, but he does find their teeth funny. (He has been exposed to a wide variety of different teeth via animals that he's hunted, but creatures that look human who have teeth like animals is funny to him).

Jacob Frye - Tell.me.WHY I just KNOW that Jacob would so totally take out the ouija board and put it in random places to scare the others lol. This would lead to Evie playing detective and staying up all night to find out what was going on, only to find that her baby brother is trolling everyone. Needless to say, Jacob's ears get boxed. He likes to play around and goof off about ghosts lurking about, but being serious he does not believe in them. Nor does he believe in contact with those who are passed on. He thinks that a place can carry bad things that have happened there, and the aura can be off, he believes the same with people as well. He could sense Starrick's craziness all the way in Crawley... It goes without saying that Jacob DEFINITELY believes in mental illness. He'd probably try to fight a werewolf to test his strength. And a vampire too. Would also probably carry treats for werewolves if he knew any and give it to them in their wolf form lol. Once the fight commences (and his inevitable loss follows) Jacob would ABSOLUTELY try to recruit them into the Rooks. He could use as many members as possible to say nothing of those with supernatural abilities. Would TOTALLY flip his flat cap over a vampire's ability to heal quickly. Like he would pull his signature Frye arm break and the vampire's arm would just *pop!* right back into place. He would lowkey be jealous because if he could do that think about how many fights he could win!

Evie Frye - DEFINITELY think that she would wonder if vampires were out there and she would be SO EXCITED if she met one. She would want to pick their brain about their experiences and hear the stories of however many lifetimes they have lived. In the game she is somewhat interested in the other side and the occult so she might dip her toes into the crystal ball and ouija board territory. She does it maybe once or twice and then quite because she doesn't get results from it (plus Jacob won't stop playing with the planchette piece using it as a monocle). She didn't like the ouija board because the rules of "Don't play alone" both annoyed her and made her weary. She would rather play alone due to the nature of serious questions she would ask about the afterlife (I honestly kinda think that she might try to make contact with her father through the ouija board but would be deterred when she heard that it could possibly be demons instead of her loved one). She's not really superstitious but she does take rules (within reason) seriously (and she tries not to break them if Jacob can behave himself lol). She has contacts everywhere and then some so hearing things through the grapevine she eventually hears the good old "things can get attached to you and follow you around" when messing around with supernatural things. This made her completely drop contacting the other side because this poor woman is already harassed by and followed by Blighters and Templars 24/7 365, okay? She doesn't need any ghosties or demons following her too. She finds the concept of the wendigo fascinating but has no plans to hunt one (unlike Jacob). The idea of werewolves makes her cringe because while she likes dogs the hearsay about werewolves having painful bone breaking transitions from human to wolf, disturbs her and fills her with sympathy for anyone who is one.

Arno Dorian - Ghosts? What ghosts? You mean the ones that haunt him on a daily basis? The ones that haunt him in his dreams? The ghosts of choices he didn't make, mistakes he made and regrets he has? Arno isn't afraid of ghosts. Not at all. Is interested in the anatomy of werewolves but is concerned about if they have parasites and fleas. (It is my own personal cannon that after the events of Unity a stray cat started harassing him like "Hey drunk sad human feed me". Eventually this led to Arno adopting the little furball). He thinks that wendigos are nothing special because they just remind him of customers at the Cafe Theatre hopped up on caffeine, he just stands there and is like "Madame/Monsieur calme-toi. Vous faites une scene." (Calm down. You're making a scene.) Doesn't put much stock in mummies but he is fascinated by the history of Ancient Egypt and their burial practices, he admires how so much care was put into their final goodbyes. People do in fact think that he is a vampire because look at him...I'll wait...enough said. He has the timeless sexiness of a vampire not to mention it just...suits him? He finds it amusing nonetheless and is actually flattered to be considered a "seductive master of the night". Werewolves he would just give them treats from the Cafe in hopes that they wouldn't bite him (Mademoiselle Whiskers - his cannon kitty - love bites him enough lol).

Bayek of Siwa - Somewhat accustomed to ghosts actually seeing as he is well acquainted with the Duat and members of the dead. He does take them there and deliver them to Anubis after all. Not afraid of them but does not want them to invade his personal life especially if they're the ghosts of the members of the order. (Man fought so hard to kill them all and then he might have to deal with them haunting him? No thank you. He's had enough.) CAN and WILL knock a vampires fangs out of their head if one ever tried to bite him because one: RUDE and two: he's not trying to catch immortality. He wants to go to the afterlife one day and I think we all know why. But besides that, he also has almost been bitten on numerous occasions by snakes, hippos, crocodiles, and even hyenas. Senu has NEVER bitten him (I refuse to believe that she even gives him love bites just lots of wing hugs, beak nuzzles, and she sees him as the sweet baby that he is so she cleans him like one lol). He gets a kick out of hollywood mummies and actually likes Boris Karloff in The Mummy, but all of the powers and curses and people being terrified of a dead body wrapped in linen strips gives him a little chuckle. He finds it quite silly to be honest. This man sees werewolves as big dogs and would probably befriend all of them because he seems like EXACTLY the type of man who has THE GIFT (aka the talent to befriend all animals). Man is a certified Egyptian Disney princess that Disney has denied us.

Desmond Miles - Man LOVES 80's horror change my mind but he does. That and 80's music so I'm not convinced that he'll scare easy. Not to mention the kind of life he lives as an assassin being in constant danger and living in paranoia with a lovely sauce of constantly looking over his shoulder (this poor baby I swear). Werewolves are cool to him because he loves dogs. Have a feeling that when Halloween rolls around, he busts out the old classics such as The Wolf Man with Lon Chaney (The Birds, Dracula, Abbott and Costello, etc). Vampires are cheesy but don't you DARE tell me that this man has not attempted to do the Dracula accent because he HAS. He's probably even binged vampire diaries (well what he could before ubisoft pulled a bitch move) and it's possible that he's even dressed up as a vampire too lol. His girlfriend lost her mind when he tried to kiss her with fake fangs in but they fell off making him a one toothed vampire lol. Ghosts aren't scary too him at all I mean...have you seen what he went through with the Bleeding Effect? Ain't no way he's phased by ANY kind of ghost that tries to do a little spooky brew haha to him. He'll just stand there exhausted with a cup of coffee as one tries to scare him and be like: "Great. What else is new?" Depending on which ancestor of his he's bleeding through the Bleeding Effect his reactions are a mixture of his own Desmond reaction and whoever he's bleeding.

OHHHH I’m so happy that you posted pt2 of how the assassins are affectionate bc I adored pt1 and I was so curious of what you would come with with the rest! Keep writing you’re awesome 👌🏽👏🏽

Awww thank you so much!! That put a big smile on my face! I'm SO HAPPY that you liked it!! I'm working on the Templars (Shay & Haytham) and Eagle Bearers next lol and those will be out soon!

A little rant...okay I got carried away so it's kinda long... apologies divine readers

Am I the only one that has noticed a rather....toxic pattern in Assassin's Creed romantic relationships?

In Unity the "relationship" between Arno and Elise is...very one sided when I take a deeper look at it. I'ma be fr here...I hated her character. I didn't revel in her death, but the game certainly felt more enjoyable without her presence and without Arno's lovesick puppy act of following her around.

She didn't stand up for him or even question the accusation of him being framed for her father Francois' murder. No 'Hey I know Arno. I love him. I trust him and I know he did not kill my father' or anything. She LEFT HIM TO ROT IN THE BASTILLE??? QUOI?? I AM CONFUSION. She was mad at him for not going after Germain because he wanted to PROTECT HER because he LOVES HER - when they got the chance to meet and kill him again later. And then THE BIG ONE - she abandoned him under that rubble to take Germain on by herself. All she had to do was take a few extra seconds to free Arno, they could have fought him together, and maybe - JUST MAYBE - she wouldn't have died. And it's not just that either it's the leaving him under that rubble for me. She was supposed to 'love him' and she left him under something that was hurting and trapping him? If it were me, I wouldn't stop until he was free Germain be damned. I will free my baguette boy and then we ferry onward to glory!

It seemed like a lecherous kind of situation where Arno gave and gave, and Elise just took and took. I felt like she hardcore used him because she knew how much he loved her, and she fully used that to her advantage. Maybe she did it on purpose, maybe it was unintentional but either way...it had me shaking my head and waving my red flag like I was in the color guard.

The same thing occurs again in Origins with Bayek and Aya. Bayek seems to love Aya a whole lot more than she loves him, and I even get the vibe that she just stayed with him because she got pregnant. I mean...she rejected his proposal because SHE wanted to go back to Alexandria to follow her dreams, SHE didn't want to be the wife of a Medjay, she was what I believe could be termed an 'absent mother' as Bayek spent more time with Khemu than she appeared to, and then she left Bayek to go off on her own and they wound up separated for a year not too long after their son's death. Bayek had to grieve alone while she seemed to just...refuse to grieve. It was strange. She never wanted to discuss Khemu even though Bayek was emotionally available for her to do so (which I loved about him because most men don't do the 'emotionally available' thing as they think it makes them seem weak). The one time I remember in the game when Bayek said that he wished not to be separated from her again after Khemu's death, she shut him up with sex...and then left again not too long after that. Then she eventually separated (read: pretty much divorced him imo) from him to go do her own thing in Rome. I mean...it certainly benefitted the Brotherhood in the long run...but it seems to me like she ran from her grief, left Bayek behind, shut herself down to all discussion of Bayek and then she even changed her identity. Reference to the Aya - Amunet transformation.

Their relationship was just tragic overall to me and the shutting down a conversation with sex, was a major red flag to me that their relationship was not going to survive the death of their son. I do think that Aya had...a type of love for Bayek. A fondness. A feeling of loyalty and a high-level trust. But I do not think for a second that Aya loved Bayek as much as Bayek loved her. Man would have gone to hell and back for her.

Why is the 'men being absolutely whipped for a woman who doesn't appreciate them' a recurring thing in the Assassin's Creed games?

I know I probably read WAAAYY too much into this but as someone who's bigtime into psychology I just - OOF. These were not some healthy fully functioning relationships. And I did not care for either of them in the long run.

Arno deserved better as did Bayek. I think they're both sweethearts - that each have their own faults and flaws of course because they're human beings - but they deserved more.

A Day at the Critter Shop

for @a-little-buggy the first one to ever make a request

The first thing that Desmond had thought when Connor had been transported to the future was...better left unsaid lest Connor's ears be violated again. The man of course was no stranger to strong language, but to hear such things upon his arrival on top of being disoriented and confused about where he was? Give the guy a break.

When they had realized that Connor had some way, somehow been brought to the future by Desmond's visits to the past, Desmond instantly felt guilty. He couldn't imagine how it felt to be ripped out of your own century and thrown into almost three hundred years in the future. He had of course immediately volunteered to take full responsibility for his ancestor and help him as much as possible. Though the nerd known as Shaun had wanted to pick Connor's brain to build a better psychological profile of him.

Desmond had thrown a package of pop tarts at him and told Connor to RUN.

Within a week the two had found themselves building quite an amicable relationship. They had more in common than they would have thought - having been born over two hundred years apart. The Bleeding Effect helped of course. Being someone and taking on their mannerisms certainly made it easier to understand the actual person.

The two men had a lazy slow afternoon about a week after Connor's arrival, with the colonial era assassin taking the news with some surprise but mostly ease. He had questions of course but he wasn't panicking the way Desmond had been. The. Whole. Entire. Time.

The guilt of the younger man was immense. He felt like it was his fault Connor had been misplaced in literal time. In experiencing the side effects and cons of the Bleeding effect, Desmond had however been able to offer the man some sort of comfort by speaking in his mother tongue to him. The two men were conversing in Kanien'keha:ka when Desmond got an idea. It was a bit wild because it involved taking a man from the 18th century out into the 21st century world, anything could happen and in Desmond's case...it usually did.

"Do you like animals Ratonhnhaké:ton?"

The man's eyebrows peaked up in interest before he answered a piece of toast halfway to his mouth. "I do. I've always felt fondly for nature and the creatures that inhabit it. Comfortable. I was raised to respect the animals in nature, even when it comes time to hunt."

Desmond nodded in understanding. "What about pets? Have you ever had one?"

"No. We usually ate the animals or came across those in the woods that were too wild to be tamed." He paused, "Can you do such a thing? Do people have...pet wolves in this century?"

"They do actually. But it is extremely rare, and they usually just nurse them back to health and then release them back into the wild." He thought about his offer and decided it was now or never. "Would you like to go to a place where they have animals available for adoption?"

His brows furrowed. "It sounds interesting."

"If you trust me, I think you'll really like it. You'll get to see as many animals as you want and you can be friendly with them."

"They won't get scared and run away?"

"No. They're used to humans normally. Some can be skittish, but you just need to be gentle with them. Come on." He grinned grabbing his keys. "I'm taking you to a pet shop."

After making sure that they wouldn't be recognized in public by any freako Templars, they headed out and twenty minutes later reached their destination. The place was huge and there was a glass display at the front of the store, filled to the brim with little puppies in one and kittens in the other. Desmond grinned excitedly, "Hey! They're having an adoption event for a few new arrivals today."

"How does one do this? Do you just go in and claim the one you want?"

Heading in with Connor close behind weary and ever alert of their surroundings, Desmond answered. "Pretty much. Only you have to sign adoption papers and you usually have to pay a fee, and sometimes buy a couple of things from the store to take care of them when you get home."

Connor nodded in understanding as he brought his hands behind his back. "What would I get?"

"Depending on the animal you could toys, collars, beds. You have to have food for them, and you can get dishes to put the food in. Every animal is different so there's different things to get for different ones. My advice? Go with either a cat or a dog."

Connor eyed a pink sparkly rhinestone collar with a look of WTF and Desmond snorted. "That is...abhorrent to the eyes. Why...would one torture an innocent animal with such a thing? It would die of embarrassment. To say nothing of not being able to blend in with their surroundings."

Desmond laughed at Connor's honesty. "Well typically a pet is kept inside your home. Most people don't want their animals getting torn up by other animals that aren't domesticated or people who are missing more than half of their marbles. They think of them as a family member."

Connor had frozen staring down into the glass encased pit and it was then that Desmond instantly knew. Connor was a dog lover confirmed. An adorable little german shepherd had its tiny paws up on the glass yipping its heart out at the tall man, who just stared curiously in response.

"What...does he want? I have no meat for him, and I didn't touch his territory." He narrowed his eyes at the little furball, "If you bite me, fair warning dog I will bite back."

Desmond snickered and came closer smiling down at the little thing. "Hey little guy. Do you like my friend?"

The puppy whined in response and Desmond had to stop himself from letting out an audible 'awww'. "The puppy wants your attention Connor. You should pick him up and hold him."

"I can hold a... what I think is a wolf pup? Its fur is unlike any that I've ever seen..."

"It's a german shepherd. A breed of dog. Not a wolf. Perfectly safe to hold. They wouldn't sell wolves in a pet store, that would count as an 'exotic animal' and you would need a license, and you have to pay fees... it's a headache basically."

Connor continued to stare at the puppy hesitating before leaning over to gently reach in and scoop the puppy up in one of his large hands. He gently brought the animal to his chest and cupped its head with his other hand hoping not to drop it. "Is this good?"

Desmond nodded smiling like a dork at the sight of such a tiny puppy in the large hands of a man who was built like a roman brick wall. "It's great man. You're doing great."

The puppy began to lick Connor's palm and the man smiled. The stretch slightly hurting his face because the muscles were unused to being used, but Connor was actually happy. Or he seemed to be. Desmond couldn't read his mind.

"If you think this little guy is cute wait until you see the other animals in the store."

The puppy by now had propped itself up to lick Connor's cheek making him smile even more and speak softly to the puppy. "You look like a wolf, but you are much nicer you know that? So soft too."

Giving the little creature a pat on the head Connor let him down back into the pit to play with his littermates. Various other puppies were there ranging from little yorkies to sassy sausage dogs and a few golden retrievers.

"Well at least we know that he'll be easy to find again. Come one we still have the cats to look at too."

When they got to the kitten pen Desmond reached in to gently offer his hand to a tiny black kitten with green eyes, which curled up in his hand, tucking their little tail in as they waited patiently for their ride upward. Connor had secured an orange tabby kitten...which was currently biting the h-e-double hockey sticks out of his hands.

Petting the cat, he winced as he watched Connor get mercilessly attacked, by the feisty little thing. "Ow! Does that not hurt man?"

Connor shrugged. "No." He studied the cat as it continued to attack his hand with the same vigor he once went after Charles Lee with when he was younger. "I'm still trying to figure out if it's trying to be intimidating..."

"I think they're playing. Cats do that. Dogs play bite and cats do too. Cats however... tend to hurt more."

Suddenly the cat overestimated its balance in Connor's hand and toppled over the side, hanging on for dear life. The kitten mewled as its tiny little body dangled from Connor's large hand, and Connor just watched with slight amusement.

"See what you this has gotten you? You bit me and now you are stuck. You reap what you sow you naughty...not mountain lion but sharp clawed creature."

Desmond wheezed laughing at Connor's sass toward the kitten for play biting him. "Here try this little one. Boy cats tend to be more aggressive, and I got a girl."

The second the two men traded cats, the orange kitten took to chewing on Desmond's hoodie strings with a fiery wrath, and the black kitten looked up at Connor. The two studied one another for a moment, before the kitten reached its paw out and batted the air like it wanted something.

Connor brought the kitten closer weary after the first encounter but was pleasantly surprised to find that the kitten wanted his braid. He felt the beads in his hair tap gently against his jaw as the kitten played with them with jovial fascination.

And he smiled. Genuinely. For the first time since - well ever entering the 21st century Desmond supposed. Connor wasn't really known for smiling even back in his own time, and Desmond would especially know having been in the Animus experiencing everything that his ancestor had. He couldn't blame him though. Connor hadn't really had anything to smile about for a good portion of his life.

He chose to change the subject. He wanted to help Connor feel comfortable, not make him upset.

"Wanna go see the fish? They're usually pretty cool to look at."

Connor opened his mouth confusion written on his face but shut it and nodded. They headed over to the fish section where there were endless aquariums filled with as many fish as you could imagine. There were small, medium and large fish

The goldfish stared at Connor through the glass before blowing a single bubble at Connor.

Desmond smiled and puffed his cheeks out back at the fish in return. "Aww. He just blew a bubble at us. I think little fishy likes us."

The tall man next to him nodded and crossed his arms, the cat on his shoulder beginning to chew on the end of his hair peeking out from the end of the colored beads. "And I like fish."

He felt hope that maybe they would be taking an unexpected pet home today. A cat or dog he had expected, but a fish was unexpected. "Oh really?"

"Yes." There was a brief pause. "With hoecakes. Or deohako. Or even sofkee. Especially grilled over the fire. These ones are scrawny though... they would hardly make a mouthful for a child."

Desmond stared at him in fascination before laughing and moved him along to another part of the store. Reaching a small section of bunnies munching on cabbage leaves and sleeping in their little huts all huddled together, Connor joined him and scoffed.

"I thought you said that this was a 'pet shop'."

Desmond frowned turning away from the cotton ball with eyes. "It is."

Connor gestured to the bunnies munching peacefully on their snacks. "Then why did they put food in a place where you adopt animals to be your pet?"

The tattooed man's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Huh?"

"We eat those as well. In my time. All the time. They're delicious. I made a pair of fur lined boots for my mother when I was boy with a creature that looked exactly like this one. It was one of my first kills actually."

Desmond smiled nervously and moved along. "Ooookay next animal coming up."

Walking around the store they came across a case with multicolored small snakes. Until one caught Desmond's eye: the Western Hognose snake. "Oh cool!" Reading the handling information he carefully opened the case, so he didn't startle the snake. He slowly stuck his hand in the snakes' path, and it slithered right into his hand, making Desmond make a face at the feeling of its slippery underbelly. He gently lifted the creature out of the case, supporting it with both hands and turned to Connor.

Where he was met with a face of abject horror.

Desmond snickered. "What? He's cute right? Look at those little beady eyes."

"How... are you not being bit or strangled right now?

"You wanna hold him? I'll take Signora whiskers on your shoulder for a second if you do."

The man backed up clutching his small furry companion closer as if for comfort, before he pointed at Desmond completely serious. "If you put that slimy slithering henchman of satan near me I will end you. Descendant of mine of not."

Desmond grinned and leisurely set the small snake down back into its enclosure, where it slithered slowly back underneath its little palm tree. "Okay not a fan of snakes. Got it." He looked around before his eyes lit up at the small creature on the other side of the store. "Let's check these guys out."

Connor reluctantly followed as he grumbled to the kitten. "Only good snake is a dead snake little one. Dead and turned into jerky. Because while dangerous, they are delicious."

They headed over to the next display where various different types of gerbils were moseying about with their own agendas, completely oblivious to the humans ogling them. Connor peered into the glass with curiosity before quaffing in surprise. "What the... what is this - is this a mouse? Why are they selling diseases carriers? These things kill people." He frowned in disdain. "They get into your grain supply too and contaminate it."

"Not these little guys Connor. They're perfectly okay to have as pets." He opened the latch and gently offered his hand to one of the gerbils. It came closer sniffing his hand before hopping on and scampering up his arm, making him laugh. "See? Completely harmless. Just be gentle with them because they're so tiny."

Suddenly the gerbil jumped from Desmond's shoulder to Connor's jacket, clinging to the fabric for dear life, before it attempted to continue its journey. Connor's voice pitched in alarm as the gerbil launched itself onto his forearm, from his jacket, and the man was quick to grab it and stop it in its tracks. "Why can it jump like that?!"

Mouth hanging open in surprise he answered, "That's what...they do...?" Desmond genuinely knew nothing about gerbils. He had always thought they were just a form of domesticated mice. Noticing a plaque in front of the cage he began to read from it absentmindedly as the gerbil ran amuck in Connor's palm, climbing his fingers as he let the animal run between his hands.

"The Mongolian gerbil is one of one hundred ten species of gerbils and have proven to be a popular pet. The tend to thrive in arid and hot types of climates such as deserts and sometimes rain forests. They are commonly found in India, Asia, and Africa and have long hind legs, that allow them to execute a unique type of leaping to get around. They make good pet and get along with other animals. It is not recommended to have a gerbil and a cat in the same house - for obvious reasons. Annnndd they have an average lifespan of two to three years out in the wild, but can live anywhere from four to five years, with proper care if domesticated."

Connor frowned at the gerbil in his hand currently busy with the task of licking its hands and cleaning its little head. "That is sad. They live for so little time. Many people in my tribe live for a very long time, upwards of a hundred years."

"Yeah. Unfortunately, animals just don't live as long as humans do. That's one of the sucky parts about having a pet. You stick around longer than they do." He grinned, "But you have a bunch of centenarians in your tribe? That's cool."

Connor's mouth twisted in thought. "Centenarians are...?"

"People who are one hundred years old and older. You become an ultra-centenarian if you're well over a hundred years old. Like one hundred twelve or something like that."

He nodded in understanding catching the kitten without any thought as she slipped from his shoulder, before bringing her down to his chest. Connor looked sheepishly back to the puppy he had played with earlier as he simultaneously cradled the kitten closer to himself.

Desmond smiled in understanding. He asked anyway though he already knew the answer, his fellow Assassin would give. "You want the dog and the kitten, don't you?"

The elder assassin didn't take his eyes off the dog, two pairs of brown eyes looking deeply into the others. They were looking at each other like they were soul bonded, and Desmond knew that dog would be the latest addition to the family. "We bonded. And dogs are known for their loyalty..."

Desmond paused before a devious grin spread across his face. "We can train it to bite Shaun when he acts like a jerk and goes on his 'I'm smarter than you' rampage."

Connor made a face of consideration. He did think that this Shaun could be quite annoying. Maybe a bite here and there could convince him to be a bit less snappy, and a bit more happy. "While devious... I like your way of thinking." He looked down at the kitten and smiled once more, as she gave a tiny little meow up at him. "She is very sweet too." He scratched her little head behind the ears making her purr loudly. Desmond was surprised to hear such a loud sound come from such a tiny little cat, and it amused him to think that if she meowed it would probably wake Shaun out of a dead sleep and annoy him.

He nodded in understanding. Shaun certainly wouldn't be happy, but Rebecca would be ecstatic about the little guys. Besides with the stressful work they were doing all the time, what could it hurt to have some cute animals running around? They all deserved a break. And Desmond would never admit this out loud... but he wanted a snuggle buddy. "Okay we'll get them and get what they need and then go home. Does that sound good?"

Connor grinned and gave a single nod. "Sounds good."

Twenty minutes, some paperwork, and money later they walked out the new co-parents of two adorable bundles of fur.

"Let's go home so we can get these little guys settled huh?"

Connor nodded content to not say a word as he watched the small dog gnaw on his finger in delight without a care in the world. He looked down at the kitten sleeping peacefully in the blanket against his chest and he smiled.

Both animals completely happy and ready to go to their forever home.

NOTE! 'deohako' meaning 'life supporters' refers to the "three sisters" crops of corn, beans and squash. These were staple foods for the Mohawk people. Alongside 'sofkee' (also known as 'sofgee') was a corn porridge that the Mohawk people often ate as well.

ALSO - Sorry that this is kind of long I got carried away, but I hope it's enjoyable nonetheless!

May I request a blurb of Desmond’s teammates insisting he has a rest for once? (Pre or post Lucy whichever)

Of course! Hope I do it justice.

Desmond was exhausted. Utterly exhausted.

He had just experienced everything Ezio felt when he lost Cristina and the overwhelming pain and guilt and anger coursing through him was too much. Everything hurt. His head, his heart, his eyes from the forceful tears shed by the sole Auditore man, his muscles. Everything.

He knew what he had to do. The recovery of his ancestor's memories was important, and it needed to be done. But that didn't mean that it wasn't hard to go through.

Experiencing Ratonhnhaké:ton's pain when he had to watch his mother die and then watch his village get destroyed. Then having to fight his own father who refused to seek peace between the Brotherhood and the Order. Altaïr's anguish when he lost his youngest son Sef and then his wife Maria. It only went further when Altaïr was consumed by guilt for not being able to save his love, and then again when his daughter in law and granddaughters left for Egypt.

Desmond's head and heart began to hurt again just thinking about everything his ancestors had suffered through. They may have had the lives of Assassin's...but it didn't mean that they deserved to suffer.

He could hear two people in the kitchen. Rebecca and Shaun by the voices and the fact that they were the only other two people in the place. They seemed to be arguing, but Desmond's head hurt too much to try and focus on what it was they were saying.

Rebecca pointed at him her eyes narrowed. "I swear to the Isu's if you say one mean or snarky thing to him, I will slap the British out of you."

Shaun quaffed and rolled his eyes. "Am I really that bad to him?"

She looked at him pointedly without saying a word and Shaun sighed relenting. "Alright. I'll be as nice as I can.

"And don't tell him to rest up for the purpose of getting him fit to get back in the Animus. Actually, try to get him to rest. You keep pushing him the way you do, and he'll actually die, instead of just dying on the inside by being emotionally and psychologically traumatized."

The man in glasses watched as Rebecca grabbed the mug of tea she had just made for Desmond.

"Take this to him." She handed the mug off to him carefully. "Without snark."

He spoke sarcastically. "Yes mum."

Rebecca swatted at him aiming to smack his head, and Shaun barely dodged, hissing when a drop of hot water splashed on his hand.

Desmond was hunched over, his elbows on his knees as he held his head in his hands. His hair was disheveled, and his skin was pale and covered in a sheen of sweat. He had bags under his eyes and dried rings of blood around his nose, from hastily wiped away nosebleeds. It seemed as though he could barely hold himself up, and if he attempted to stand, he would fall over without assistance.

Shaun could see that the man was clearly bone tired from his interactions in the Animus.

He was going to try and be nice. He really was. Lest he be smacked by Rebecca and continue to be a complete arse to the guy who was literally the only reason why they could continue their research.

Shaun's voice was gentle. It didn't sound like him, but he was trying. Far too gentle for the snappy and grouchy man Desmond had gotten to know. "Desmond?"

Desmond looked up slowly squinting as the light hit his sensitive eyes and he was met by the scent of ginger and the sight of a coffee cup.

It was Shaun offering him a cup of tea. He reached up hesitantly wincing as his muscles protested against the action and inhaled the scent. It smelled good. Certainly, better than gunpowder, stale blood, and dirt.

The assassin didn't want to assume anything, but he thought for a moment that the British man had a look of concern on his face. He was probably seeing things. Which wouldn't be a surprise in the least.

He spoke again, once more sounding strange compared to how he normally did. "You need to rest for a while. Recover for the sake of yourself. You've been going too long without proper rest."

Desmond wanted to rebuff his statement and say that he just needed a moment before continuing. But he realized that he did need to rest. He felt like death warmed over itself and something within him told him that if he didn't...he would thoroughly regret it.

Rebecca stood a bit of a ways behind him with her arms crossed observing the both of them. "You need to Des. Seriously. We're not going anywhere. We'll be right here if you need anything."

Shaun nodded in agreement. "It's time to rest mate."

Birthdays

Do any of y'all ever think to yourselves "Birthdays suck. I wish I didn't have one."?

Sometimes I wish I lived in another world preferably Assassin's Creed. I'd be alone but at least I wouldn't be with somebody that makes me feel alone.

Wonder how the assassin's creed characters would react to my birthday. Probably wouldn't care. I don't know it's fun to wonder sometimes though.

Happy freakin' birthday to me...