*slams All My Money On Counter*

*slams all my money on counter*

Dumb short story idea: A married woman comes to realize she feels no attraction to her husband. She goes to see counsellors about it and is told things like "Oh you just need to spice things up in the bedroom" and "have you tried taking a vacation to rekindle the romance?" But none of it works.

Then, with nothing else to try, she sits down with her husband and explains what she's feeling and he goes "Honey, I think you're gay."

"Wait, really?"

"Yeah, did you not have sex ed in school?"

"No."

Smash cut to credits over footage of the woman getting remarried to her girlfriend, her ex husband is the Maid of Honor, gown and all.

Kitchen, on top of the fridge. Only my aspirin lives in my bathroom cabinet

recently saw ppl discuss whether they put their medicines in a kitchen cabinet or a bathroom cabinet and i was shocked by the fact that many ppl said kitchen cabinet. so now i need you to reblog this and say where you keep yours

SqurrelFlight!

i drew LeafPool i have to draw Surrelflight lol

God knows I am

(part 3)

MA’AM, THIS IDEA IS A WORK.

Bad idea for a Romantic Comedy The Chief of Police is married to a Mob Boss, and they have to keep “just failing” to catch each other. When one of them hits the other in a shootout, it’s followed with “Oh I’m never going to hear the end of this…”

“So how was your day at work?” “YOU FUCKING SHOT ME! THAT WAS MY DAY AT WORK!”