I Getcha I Was Wondering If You Could Do A Comforting Headcannon With Sanzu, Mikey, Hanma, Ran, And Rindou

I getcha ☺️ I was wondering if you could do a comforting headcannon with sanzu, Mikey, Hanma, ran, and Rindou where their s/o has PTSD from SA where they just stare into space sometimes and starts to cry from bottling up from how the medicine doesn’t work all the time and she feels they’re going to hurt her too if it’s not too much to ask..thank you ☺️

This post might have some small triggers, I tried my best to not make it as triggering as possible. I hope you're doing okay and that you will find comfort in this <3

PTSD (Tokyo Revengers)

Genre: Slight Angst?? Headcanons

Pairings: Sanzu, Mikey, Hanma, Ran, Rindou x Fem! S/O

TW: Mentions of SA, Killing, getting over PTSD, Victim Blaming, this blog may also contain triggers for people with PTSD. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

P.S Characters are 18+

SANZU HARUCHIYO

We all know Sanzu can get pretty aggressive especially when he is high but when he met you he turned into the complete opposite.

When you both started dating you kept it from him since you were scared that he might use it against you.

If you would remember the horrible scenario you would keep it away from him and won't say a single thing, because of that he didn't have any single clue to what you were feeling.

Sanzu may be chaotic but your first impression of him was actually good when you both first met. You both met through a coffee shop when he and kakucho were spying on someone and then he treated you to coffee and that's when your love started to bloom.

Sanzu respected your space, you were like Mikey to him, you were his queen. He respected you so much that he wouldn't even dare kiss you without asking you first, but he tried to kiss you one time without asking since he was trying to actually 'do it' with you and set the mood but that's when he found out...

You flinched away from him and you were shaking, yelling at him to not come any closer.

"Hey, hey...Y/N...what's wrong? I'm sorry...I just wanna kiss you..."

You looked up and Sanzu and started crying...No one can ever explain how hurt he was to see you.

You of course explained it to him and even told him who it was, It made his blood boil of course but that was not important. FOR NOW...what's important is to calm you down and talk about it calmly.

After the talk you both had about the incident he would try to not use drugs whenever he is with you and would also ask all the time if he can touch you, he knows how hard it is to have trauma's and not tell anyone how you're feeling...he knows.

He would also try his best to find the culprit and kill them without you knowing and if he ever did find them he would be on his high and make sure that he is to torture them from what he did to you.

To him you didn't deserve that and you deserve more. You were his Queen.

Everytime you're feeling scared or having episodes, he would leave you alone for a moment and then cuddle you after.

"I'm here, Y/N. It wasn't your fault, you deserve more and I'm here to make you feel safe again...I'm here"

MANJIRO SANO (MIKEY)

Mikey is a bit clingy and touchy, yes he may not look like it but he is only with you though.

You two were actually highschool sweethearts, of course that ended up with a lot of break ups because of you know...Him leaving his friends.

Your trauma happened when you two were on a break and had a fight, the friend you thought who was gonna help you with your problem with Mikey ended up...Hurting you.

You and Mikey were on a break for like 6 months until he took you back and he was now the leader of Bonten. You didn't tell him a single word.

When he found out about it he nearly broke a huge meeting table and nearly killed one of his subordinates from stopping him.

You and him were in one of the meetings of Bonten, everything was going great, you were beside Mikey; smiling at him from time to time, until he landed a hand on your thigh, making you flinch and fall to the ground.

Everyone was startled when you fell and started crying, shaking and yelling for help.

Kakucho tried to help you up but then you started hitting him and yelled to not touch him and that's when everyone found out...you were a victim...

Mikey was not the smartest in the room so he had to ask Sanzu and you what was going but since you weren't answering, he asked Sanzu. Sanzu explained him and at that point Mikey's eyes darkened.

"What are you idiots standing there..."

Everyone's attention turned to Mikey, who was shaking from anger. Before you all know it he flipped the meeting table almost hitting Ran; making you flinch and yelp into a corner.

"FIND THEM NOW! and if you don't I'll kill all of you"

He yelled at his subordinates, everyone hurried out to find the culprit; as he stayed there trying to comfort you but you were too scared and he doesn't know what to do, so instead of leaving he stayed infront of you.

You reached out to him and hugged him, he gladly returned it. You were shaking while you hug him and this broke his heart.

"Y/N...I'm here...From now on, I'll protect you...No matter the cost" He hugged you tighter not in a tight suffocating hug but the type of hug that you know it will protect you forever...

HANMA SHUJI

Like Mikey, Hanma can be a bit touchy and clingy and I see Hanma as with someone with high sex drive, like he is always horny.

You and Hanma met normally, he asked for your number, went on dates and that's it. It was kinda shocking how you two haven't kissed yet, well Hanma tried but you would always decline him.

That's how he got the habit of always asking you before kissing you which he doesn't mind and you don't mind as well since it can give you time before explaining him your past experience before dating.

Hanma found out in the worst way possible...

Take note Hanma has high sex drive and you two haven't done it yet because of you declining and always stopping him before he could do anything, this time he had enough.

You heard the door open, walking towards the door you were about to greet your boyfriend but you were suddenly smothered with kisses and touches; your eyes widened and then you suddenly pushed him.

Hanma stared at you and then you ran to the corner, holding your head and begging to not hurt you or do anything anymore...

Hanma is stupid and always fails to read the room, he would always make jokes and wouldn't care whether it was something serious but he knows he can't joke this time, you were showing him genuine fear.

He walked towards you but you just flinched more and started shaking even more, All Hanma can do was stare at you with hurt in his eyes.

After a few seconds you've calmed down and was now noticing where you were, when you raised your head you saw Hanma looking at you sitting on the arm rest of the sofa as he fiddles with his fingers.

You walked up to him and hugged him, he returned it of course but he started crying...He was sorry, he was too rough and he was stupid for not noticing...

You calmed him down and told him it was by accident and it wasn't his fault, after calming him down you explained everything. Hanma was mad but for now he will comfort you and make sure you feel safe again, after that he will ask Kisaki for help to find the culprit and kill them.

"I'm sorry Y/N...I'll be more gentle next time...I'm sorry...you didn't deserve that..."

RAN HAITANI

Ran likes to make sexual, over the top jokes and offensive remarks, like he can't control his mouth.

You were the first girl Ran actually treated right, he always asks for consent and respects your space...you were just different and he always has the urge to ask before touching, kissing you or even before doing the deed.

Throughout your entire relationship he didn't know, afterall you're a great liar; of course he wouldn't know even if he just saw you spacing out and almost crying and would tell him a lame excuse, that's how good of a liar you are.

But we all know that won't last...the lie, I mean...

You and Ran were bot in the sofa, cuddling and scrolling to you guys own phones and that's when he spoke up.

"Why can't victims just speak up??..."

This made you stop and looked at him with a glare, he looked at you with a confused face...

"Are you literally asking me why can't victims just speak up????"

"I mean yeah! the problem would be done as---"

That's when you slapped him, you were crying and shaking...He just stared at you for a few minutes and that's when he stood; as soon as he stood up, your eyes widened and you ran to a corner to hide, yelling at him to not hurt you. Ran was confused but he wasn't stupid...You're hiding something...

He walked towards your hiding spot and kneeled down, he was about to reach out but he stopped when he noticed you sobbing and can't stop shaking.

He wanted to comfort you so even if you it might scare you a bit, he pulled you into a hug and started comforting and rubbing cricles on your back, your shaking lessened and you slowly stopped crying.

Ran continued to plant kisses on your head and rubbing your back, while he was comforting you, you told Ran everything and why you suddenly got mad.

He felt stupid and wanted to punch himself but he wants to comfort you more, you both stayed like that until you both said your sorry's to each other. Ran was still mad of course but not at you nor himself anymore, he was mad to the person who did this to you.

He may not look like he was about to plan murder but trust me...He is...When you go to bed he will make sure to call Rindou and tell him to look for the guy but for now he will stay quiet.

"I'm really sorry, Y/N...wanna go out and buy sweets? you like sweets right? let's cheer you up, My love~"

RINDOU HAITANI

I see Rindou as the type to not care but actually cares, especially if it's you.

Unlike the others he ain't stupid, careless, slobbermouth, or just plain STUPID. So he will know your situation, whether you tell him or not.

He found out about your situation because he caught you.

Rindou was tired that day because of work, you guys were new to the relationship but you two decided to stay at his place since he is already sure about you anyways.

You usually greet him, no matter how late he was at work but this time you didn't. He thought maybe you were already asleep, He removed his shoes, loosened his tie and went straight to your shared bedroom.

He was about to open the door when he heard loud sobs inside the room, he opened lightly and took a peak...It was you crying and slowly reaching for the dresser for some medicine, Rindou was curious but he didn't said a word and started opening the door and acted like he didn't saw anything.

You were startled but played it off and told him you just finished watching something, which he didn't believe you.

The next day, you were in the kitchen while he was in the bedroom. The sight of you crying can't seem to escape his mind, opening the drawer he took a look at your 'PILLS'...He saw multiple orange bottles..

SSRI, Zoloft, Paxil, Anti-depressants...It was there, he quickly closed the drawer and said his goodbye's to you and left for work, he wasn't able to focus at all that day so during the whole day he tried to find out for himself why would you take those vitamins.

That's when he found about the doctor who you were seeing with the help of Sanzu and Kokonoi with their stalking skills and asked him (more like threatened him) to talk about your condition. He found out that you were a victim...

This broke his heart, he might question why you didn't tell him but at the same time he understands.

He would ask Sanzu and his brother to find the guy and would ask them to bring him back to headquarters without you knowing.

After him finding it out, he would always be gentle with his touches when it comes to you, If you ever flinch at his touches he would say sorry which it wasn't his character since he never apologizes.

You finally understood why he was being gentle, when he said those exact words it made you cry and hug him.

"I know everything about you, Y/N...No matter what happened I will love you...It wasn't your fault, you deserve better. I'm here when you want to talk..."

ROMAN HOLIDAY ; THIRD ACT

(n.) — an occasion on which enjoyment or profit is derived from others’ suffering or discomfort.

+ k. hanemiya x f!reader. mafia!au. heavy angst. romance. explicit smut. mature. explicit language. some things i can’t reveal yet. proceed with discretion.

+ @hotaru987 thank you so much for beta-ing <3

+ die for you by the weeknd, roman holiday by halsey, american money by børns, gold rush by taylor swift, desperado by rihanna, dancing with your ghost by sasha sloan, cherry by lana del rey

+ MASTERLIST.

“Table number four.” Chifuyu, the bartender, winked at you while pushing two cognacs over the counter.

“Again, huh?” You jabbed with a lighthearted chuckle, picking the glasses to place on your own tray.

“Well, it’s Saturday,” he added with a shrug, wiping his hands with a paper towel. “Careful not to trip.”

You flippantly rolled your eyes heavenwards, earning a full-throated chuckle from him.

It’s Saturday. Customers from all over Athalen came barreling inside Nirvana like ants to a colony the moment the sun disappeared. Because of the buzz and vibrance, you almost tripped one or two times. You just couldn’t keep up with the havoc.

“Here’s your order, Sir.” You politely inclined your head, hugging the tray closer to your stomach after placing the glasses on the table. “Please, enjoy the night.”

Occupied in exchanging saliva with one of Nirvana’s women, the man ignored you completely. They were groping each other’s flesh: hand on her boob, hand on his crotch. You screwed your eyes while inhaling slowly, pivoting on your heels as quickly as you could to give them privacy.

Out of all the staff, you remained to be the only one fazed by all the ruckus and vulgar show of hedonism. Sybaritism was a norm here in Nirvana, after all.

“Here, drink.” Wide-toothed, Chifuyu offered you a glass of tequila. “You look like you need one.”

Groaning, you emptied the glass with one gulp. Wincing once the rough caress of the alcohol grazed down your throat.

“Thanks,” you croaked, wiping your mouth. Leaning your elbow on the counter while watching the chaos, you pointed out, “This party doesn’t seem to end.”

Before coming to Athalen, you used to believe that Ildico’s clubs were the epitome of nightlife. Funny how Nirvana alone had crushed that belief underfoot.

Chifuyu leaned, dipping his head as an answer. “Yes. Nirvana’s quite known all over town because of boss Diavolo,” he explained. “After all, he’s one of the leading godfathers in Athalen. Besides that, there’s not one soul who’s ever complained about this club’s services.”

Diavolo. Nirvana’s boss. You have yet to see the man, but he certainly sounds as dangerous as his name. Talking about being a mafia godfather, you’d bargained on nothing but authority from him.

“How long have you been working here?” Your attention was glued to the lounge singer at the raised platform.

“Ever since I was fourteen. I’m twenty-six now,” Chifuyu replied.

Oh, he’s older than you by only a year.

“Isn’t fourteen a bit too young for this kinda work?” you prodded. You had no recollection of your life before your twentieth. But you knew that a fourteen-year-old shouldn’t be subjected to this kind of environment yet.

“Doesn’t matter if you wanna survive, does it?” Chifuyu’s eyes were fixated on the platform. They were sharp eyes. Almost cat-like in appearance. “And this is Athalen.”

You blew out a breath. “Yes, that’d explain everything.”

“Yup. If you’re confused about somethin’, just remember that this is the city where everything is possible.”

The both of you shared a minute of silence before Chifuyu slashed the stillness apart.

“How ‘bout you? Heard from Senju that you’re new here. Of all places, why Athalen?”

Without Aunt Celene’s letter, you wouldn’t have imagined yourself journeying towards this kind of town, either. Places such as Athalen posed a grave threat. Even though you were surprisingly fitting in, it remained daunting and somewhat impenetrable.

“I’m looking for someone,” you divulged.

“Someone? Someone important?” Chifuyu pumped. “Maybe I can help you.”

You eagerly whipped your head to him. “I’m looking for a person named Kazutora Hanemiya. Ring any bells?”

“Hm.” Chifuyu straightened with his fingers under his chin. “Kazutora... Hanemiya...” He remained like that for a few seconds, testing the name with his tongue. “Can I see his picture?”

Pictures. You backed away, blinking. “I... I don’t have one.”

“Then, could you describe him to me?”

Haunches slumping on the stool, you went crestfallen. Why hadn’t you realized it before? You had no idea of what Kazutora looked like.

“I... I haven’t seen Kazutora before,” you sheepishly admitted.

Chifuyu hummed. “Not to sound offensive but you moved here to find a person you haven’t met before?” At the nod of your head, he released a pensive sigh. “That’ll be hellish—” Chifuyu raised a finger to excuse himself, picking up the piece of paper the other staff had slapped over the table. He began mixing drinks. “Maybe you can ask a professional for help. The downside’s you gotta spend bucks.”

Your interest heightened with your hope. Closing some gap between you, you quirked your brows up. “Is there any person I can go to for help?”

“Yup.” Chifuyu poured the drinks into the glass. “But I haven’t seen them tonight, though.”

“They work here?”

He gave a small nod. “Yeah, both of them.”

Thrilled, your eyes widened a fraction. “Who are they?”

“Baji and Chryso.”

—

“They’re famous handymen here in Athalen. If you want something done, go and hire them. They’re great dudes though Chryso is a Kyrva and a bit anti-social.”

Chifuyu’s suggestion invaded your mind while you walked the vibrant streets of the Heart. Thick throngs of people still annexed the whole street despite the twelve o’clock bell like the party had just started.

Hugging your jacket closer to your body, you released an exasperated sigh.

Who would’ve thought that you’d work as a waitress? Your father would lose it if he ever knew you served drinks for men in a brothel now. His fermenting face coaxed a giggle out of you. After all, he was respected all over Ildico. To think that his daughter would work in a city he despised so much truly felt like something else. It felt like freedom. Joy.

Your father, Alexis, wasn’t entirely austere. However, ever since waking up from the accident, you had never stepped out of the villa without a few guards trailing behind you with their stoic and unyielding mien. The only times he’d allowed you to be left on your own devices was whenever Emma, Mikey, Shin, and Izana were around.

It’s suffocating being inside that huge and melancholic mansion. If it were you, you would’ve lived on your own instead. But being the sole heiress of your family’s fortune, it remained a tough job to neglect the eighty-year-old legacy your grandfather’s grandfather had built.

Considering that fact, even you were amazed at how you successfully engineered your escape. Going on a lam should have been risible by how high the villa’s security was. You supposed even implemented rules would be nothing but trifling hindrances for someone who yearned for the pieces of themselves.

For your escape to not fall in vain, you have to find Kazutora Hanemiya. To accomplish that, you fathomed out that manpower was all you needed.

But... Baji and Chryso? Those men had been nothing but uncanny when you first met them. Knowing that they were somehow related and working with each other settled a boulder to your chest. Thinking about crossing paths with either of them tickled your stomach with anxiety. But if what Chifuyu claimed was true, that they were truly an adroit jack of all trades, your chances of finding Kazutora Hanemiya would increase dramatically. Wouldn’t it?

Finally, the moderately astir streets of A-9 loomed from the distance. Relief surged through your body at the sight of your apartment building. Yearning nothing but to slump on your creaky bed, you picked up the pace, literally jogging to reach comfort from your abode, at long las—

Your heart jumped inside your ribcage. Hands flying to cover a loud shriek that had already rocked out of your mouth.

Five steps away from you, there was a man unconsciously lying on the ground.

Did he pass out? Or... or dead? The latter intensified the fear blanketing your body. It wouldn’t be far-fetched, given that heinous crimes happen in alleyways as narrowed as this one.

You debated calling for help, but thought it better to examine the man first. Perhaps he’s merely knocked out cold because of inebriation. You wouldn’t want to cause a disturbance for a petty reason such as that.

Knees slightly shaking, you closed the small distance between you. Drawing nearer, your good eye finally adjusted to the dark, allowing you to see the body’s proportion. With the help of the moonlight and the little illumination coming from the main street, you discerned that the man had jet black hair accentuated by blonde strands.

You gasped in sheer horror. He wasn’t who you thought he was, right?

When he groaned, you jolted and nearly ran. His groaning turned into labored gasps. The sound was so excruciating that even your lungs constricted hearing it.

Slightly jumping on your toes to shake the trepidation off your system, you knelt beside him and took his face with your hands.

“Chryso?” You tapped his face. His skin was covered in sweat. He felt cold to the touch, too. “H... hey! Chryso? Chryso?! Come on!” you frustratedly lamented, still wiping his face and tapping his cheeks while he continued to groan and gasp and convulse.

You couldn’t carry him if you tried. There was no way you could. Therefore, you carefully reclined his head back to the ground.

“Please, please! Don’t die!” you stuttered. The wild beating of your heart was audible even in your ears. “I’ll... I’ll be back!”

Not wasting a second breath, you stood up and trotted for the main street.

“Help!” you yelled, frantic and scared. “There’s... there’s a person—!” Your feet brought you to the nearest woman. Holding onto her wrist tightly, you looked at her feverishly. “Help me! I need your help!”

She looked at you weirdly, as if your crazy expression deserved a laugh. “Ask someone else,” she muttered before tugging her wrist away in disdain.

Your bones shook in fury. Heat washed through your body. Violence whispered that you raise your hand and strike the woman. You would’ve done so had you not been jerked away by a strong hand.

You rotated with a hiss. And there were eyes like black pools staring at you with perturbation.

Baji. He was huffing like he’d ran a marathon.

“He... help! Chryso... he’s passed out—” Your words tripped over each other.

Baji’s irises contracted before dashing towards the alley leading to your apartment. As if he’d already concluded that Chryso would be there.

Puzzled by his sudden sprinting, you dashed before him.

“Chryso!” Baji shouted before kneeling beside the torpid man. “Chryso! Goddamn it!”

You stood there, frenziedly wiping your palms together. “Is... is he going to be—”

Baji shot you a look through the darkness. A piercing stare that had the hairs on your nape standing. “Help me carry him,” he grunted.

Your feet moved on their own, flinging Chryso’s arm over your shoulder. More than half of his weight fell on Baji, but he remained heavy.

Under the spotlight of the main street, not one offered any help. Even though it was painstakingly obvious that you were in dire need for aid, they merely stole quick glances at you. Wary and disgust plain on their faces as they took in the sight of the man on your shoulder.

“What’s wrong with these people?” you grumbled, still clinging on Chryso’s side for dear life.

“Because he’s a Kyrva,” Baji grouched.

Curiosity and confusion clashed by his statement. Weren’t Kyrvas treated like humans in this town? Senju claimed so.

After a gruesome and onerous attempt to carry Chryso, you finally reached your apparent destination south of Area 9. On the door, it was plastered that the doctor was out. That much was expected since it’s quarter to one already.

“I don’t think the doctor’s inside,” you ground out the obvious, back aching because of Chryso’s weight.

Baji ignored your sentiments by rapping at the door so hard his knuckles would surely bleed. “Mitsuya! Mitsuya! It’s me, Baji!” He knocked and yelled a few more times, shamelessly waking the whole neighborhood.

“M... maybe we could take Chryso somewhere else? The lights are off and you’ll wake the neighborhood at this point,” you suggested, twisting your bottom lip with your teeth.

“This is the only clinic that accepts Kyrvas,” Baji mentioned forlornly before returning to his aggressive knocking. “Mitsuya! Mitsuya—”

When the door unlatched, the space displayed a man with an average height. His hair was short and trimmed neatly, eyebrows razored in between. He’s looking at Baji as though he wanted to strangle him. Although at Chryso’s unconscious sight, his tired eyes widened.

“What the fuck did he do this time?” The man sighed strenuously, opening the door wider for the three of you to enter. “He’d better not be just drunk or I’m stabbing your eyes with a scalpel, Baji.”

You helped Baji place Chryso to the cold hospital bed. He lied down while groaning painfully and sweating profusely.

“Mitsuya, relax.” Baji suspired, holding his hands up to pacify the man.

Mitsuya donned his lab coat before sanitizing his hands. His response to the matter was swift and natural that you quickly reckoned this situation as a common reoccurrence.

“Sorry you had to carry him all the way here.” He looked at you apologetically while closing the curtains to what looked like his operating space. “What’s your name?”

You told him before adding, “And don’t worry. I live nearby, so it’s really not a bother.” No, it was. You should’ve been snoring by now if you hadn’t seen Chryso.

“You’re new ‘round here, aren’t you? Haven’t seen that face before,” he pointed out, grabbing an elastic from the side table.

Glancing at Baji, who had his arms crossed over his chest while leaning back towards the wall, you cleared your throat. “Yeah. I moved here almost three weeks ago.”

He inclined his head, wrapping Chryso’s elbow with the elastic before taking one clean syringe and a vial. Mitsuya whipped his head to Baji. “Hold him down.”

“I’m letting go if he goes batshit. I don’t need a bruised cheek tomorrow,” Baji groused before sauntering close to cage Chryso’s body.

Why?

Similar to Mitsuya, he acted as if this occurrence was anything but strange. Him, taking Chryso to this clinic. Mitsuya, administering whatever was on the vial to the Kyrva. Being an outsider, you remained reticent while watching them from the sidelines.

Mitsuya chuckled, repeatedly toppling and feeling Chryso’s basilic vein with his fingers. Once the vein finally had swollen underneath, he worked with the vial and the syringe. With the grace of a doctor, he lined the needle and punctured through Chryso’s vein. “Bad for the business, huh?”

Baji opened his mouth to retort, but Chryso’s sudden thrashing halted him from doing so.

And the bed clattered. Chryso groaned, louder than before. He’s convulsing. Thrashing. Groaning. Drool slipped from the sides of his lips as he gritted his teeth and bit down hard. Veins and beads of sweat both snaked his face. Patches of perspiration blotching his black fitted shirt.

“Damn it! How many fucking times do you need—!” Baji hissed, his biceps flexing in his attempt to placate the Kyrva’s animalistic floundering.

You watched, motionless with your mouth hanging open. What is happening to him? What was that medicine? It had ironically just augmented the pain he felt.

Mitsuya observed Chryso frustratedly.

Baji threw his whole weight on Chryso’s body in his attempt to soothe him.

Blinking rapidly, your body heedlessly moved to the edge of the bed. It rattled continuously with Chryso’s thrashing. You gulped, hands flying to hold down his feet. When all of a sudden, his golden eyes met yours.

Was it just the ungodly hours getting to you or did Chryso’s expression softened a fraction at your sight?

“It’s... it’s okay,” you exhaled. Instead of holding his feet down, you found yourself moving beside him.

Baji studied your movements warily.

Holding Chryso’s eyes, you swallowed before reaching out a hand to him. His breathing remained heavy but his flailing had died down an iota. “It’s okay, Chryso,” you murmured, mollifying the man. Your hand found his, clutching tightly.

“Let go. Chryso will—”

Your loud wince trampled on Baji’s warning. Chryso squeezed your hand tight as to crush bones. He’s back on his thrashing and convulsing. Mitsuya ran for the rescue but it proved useless against Chryso’s strength.

“Let go!” Baji yelled.

Your hand burned in his grip. Grinding your teeth in resolution, you endured the pain nonetheless. “It’s okay.” Encasing Chryso’s hand with your spare one, you smiled despite the whimper almost falling from your tongue.

“He’s gonna crush your bones,” Mitsuya chimed. “Let go.”

You considered none of them as you enveloped Chryso’s hand tightly. “Chryso, it’s okay. We’re here. It’s alright,” you murmured softly, repeating the words like a lullaby.

Another minute passed with his threshing and your shushing. His golden eyes snapped at you. Then his grip finally loosened, allowing you to exhale a relief. At long last, his chest slowly heaved normally.

You flashed him a trembling smile, shoulders finally unknotting.

However, Chryso sat with a force that propelled Baji back. And it was just a matter of a second, a little drop of time— before his lips were on yours.

You went absolutely gelid. Mitsuya and Baji’s incredulous curses were a distant sound as Chryso’s lips moved. He deepened the kiss, holding your face closer to him as if he wanted to merge it with his own. Mouth moving ravenously against your still one, his teeth clashed against yours.

When he pulled back, you had the urge to fill your lungs with air. He examined your face. His mouth was red as if seared.

“Chryso! Fuck you!” Baji hissed, pulling Chryso’s body back to the bed. He didn’t budge. Baji, struggling to tug him away, snapped his head to your direction, eyes apologetic. “I’m sorry. That’s... that’s his way to thank you.”

Your fingers flew to your lips, laying a featherlight touch to the now plumped muscle.

Chryso captured Baji’s wrists, peeling them off his body. The latter begrudgingly released him. Despite that, he remained a hand’s reach away.

Chryso studied you with such fondness that burned your eye with unshed tears. His golden eyes were surprisingly tender for a Kyrva. When he brushed your cheek with the back of his forefinger, your throat tightened and you almost sob.

Why?

He leaned closer again, his breath fanning your cheek. An inch away from your mouth, he managed to whisper weakly, “You’ve gotten more beautiful.”

Before he could touch your lips with his again, his eyes drooped and his forehead fell to your shoulder.

—

It’s five-minutes shy of two o’clock.

Again, you found yourself in an unforeseen situation that rendered you off a fistful night’s sleep. Your eye and bones were heavy. Even if you go back home now, sleep for sure won’t come for you. Not when your whole system had been awakened by an unpredicted, insatiable kiss.

“Just ignore him. He’s always like that when having withdrawals,” Baji commented across from you, his voice deep and gravelly from lack of sleep.

You tilted your head up, slightly abashed by how he’d easily read your expression. “Yeah. I... really should,” you responded quietly.

Perhaps your face had given away your thoughts. After all, you were still running a finger along your lips, feeling the tingling traces of Chryso’s kiss.

Mitsuya rose from his mini-kitchen adjacent to his working space, offering you a cup of steaming coffee. You nodded a thanks, holding the cup with your other good hand. The other remained throbbing faintly.

“This is bad.” Mitsuya crossed his arms over his chests, slanting his haunches to the working table. The heavy lassitude on his frame was completely gone. Chryso’s thrashing had left him, as well as you and Baji, with weary bones yet active minds. “He’s deliberately neglecting the Ruby, Baji. And this is withdrawal all over again,” he sighed, flinging his hands exasperatedly.

Over the rim of your cup, you hopped your sight from the disappointed Mitsuya to the sulking Baji.

Would this be the best time to finally excuse yourself?

However, Mitsuya spoke again. “I don’t know what the fuck happened this time, but it seems to me that he hasn’t taken a single Ruby for four straight days. Four straight days, Baji. If this continues, his body will yearn for higher doses. You know what that means, right?”

Ruby? Doses? Was it safe to assume that the Ruby was some sort of a drug? Was Chryso ill? Why did he need to consume such drugs? He said something about it that night you first met, too.

Licking the sides of your lips, you chimed in to their conversation, “Why? What... what would happen?”

“Higher doses means shorter lifespan,” Baji responded quietly.

Your eyebrow cocked up. “Wait... is this Ruby some sort of a drug? Isn’t it a drug’s job to lengthen someone’s lifespan and not the other way around?”

Baji exchanged glances with Mitsuya. He grabbed the back of his neck, tilting his head up to release some tension building up on his body. “It doesn’t work that way when it comes to Kyrvas.”

Before you could suspire your bafflement, Mitsuya provided answers. “Starting from infancy, Kyrvas consume amphetamines called the Ruby.”

Your face morphed in unmitigated terror. “Amphetamines? Infancy? You can’t drug a baby!” Sickened at the fact that these people had the stomach to drug an infant, your voice had gone a pitch higher.

Mitsuya’s eyes softened with regret. Hinting that he’d also found it vile and bizarre to inject amphetamines to newborns. Aside from remorse, in his mien you found determination, too. Determination that conveyed he wouldn’t stop doing it for the Kyrvas.

“Out of the womb, they’ll start yearning for the Ruby. If an infant fails to consume the drug, they’ll die in two days. It’s the only thing keeping Kyrvas functional. Without it, their body will deteriorate inside.” Mitsuya paused for a gulp. “It’s hard, I know. But they need to be drugged all their lives to experience life itself.”

All that in a span of two minutes. You were tongue-tied. How could you even knock off any thoughts? Athalen’s guidebook mentioned none of that. They couldn’t just write such a twisted system to dirty their already muddied reputation, huh?

“But... for an infant...” You trailed off. The reality was like a bone stuck in your throat. You couldn’t swallow it down no matter your efforts.

Unconsciously, your eye journeyed towards Chryso’s location. He’d been resting for thirty-minutes now. The thrashing and the groaning had stopped. Before you left him to rest, his face was peaceful.

Your lips trembled thinking that a man like him had been subjected to this kind of life without much of a fight. It wasn’t just him. Who knew how many young Kyrvas suffered a similar fate? Fate that was forced onto them before leaving their mother’s womb.

“I doubt it’ll make you feel better, but infants are issued the lowest dosage of Ruby,” Mitsuya explained further. “It’s only increasing gradually to support their growth.”

Outside Athalen, infants need milk to support their bodies. Not amphetamines. Certainly not a drug called Ruby.

“How did this happen?” you blurted, head fixated to the Kyrva’s location despite the curtain blocking his image from you. What devilry happened to this town that it ended up like this?

It was Baji’s voice that echoed next. “Blame World War II. The Generals injected higher doses of amphetamines to the soldiers in order to heighten their strengths. Athalen footed the bill for the project. Therefore, when it failed, the city suffered for it.”

That’d explain why Athalen was also called the Fallen City. It was the richest before. Businessmen once flocked Athalen in hopes to widen their trade. Until one day, the city and its economy dwindled and eventually crumbled.

In the end, it wasn’t only the city which suffered. The people involved in their imbecility carried their wrongdoings to this day. The Generals who concocted this wickedness might have been buried six-feet-under already, but their wrongdoings perpetuated to make the Kyrvas’ lives miserable.

Fixated on Chryso’s location, you raised a question. “If it was such a necessity, why does he refuse to drink it?”

The second you snapped your attention to Baji, he went utterly silent. It was evident that he knew why, but didn’t appear cooperative to divulge Chryso’s reasons.

“Chryso believes that it causes him to hallucinate. Which is odd. He’s gonna get real hallucinations, not to mention severe withdrawals, now that he’s not drinking the Ruby. And the worst part of it all, he abstained from it for four days. If not for the Azul, he’d be in so much pain for a long time,” Mitsuya dragged. “I’ll have to increase his dosage.”

Baji had an expression that you couldn’t fathom. Suddenly, he looked at you through his lashes. Quickly as you could, you snapped your attention away from him, heart jumping.

“Increase his dosage,” Baji repeated derisively, but a hint of melancholy laced his tone. “Again, huh?”

You were right, then? This wasn’t the first time Chryso experienced these withdrawals.

“Then... Chryso’s lifespan will...?” You couldn’t pull the words out as they were like needles pricking your throat.

Mitsuya’s eyes were glassy as he fixed them in Chryso’s direction. “Yes. He’s been doing this for more than five years since he came back from Ildico: neglecting the Ruby until he’s on the verge of death.”

Five years? Ildico? Your heart leaped inside your chest.

Your mouth released the question before you could stop it. “What... What happened to Chryso five years ago? Why Ildico? What did he do at Ildico?”

Baji’s jaws were taut as a string, his teeth grinding against each other inside his maw. He’s obviously overwrought.

“I don’t know much about it—” Mitsuya was cut off by Baji’s obnoxious yawning.

At your face, he foolishly grinned. “It’s two thirty. Let’s get ya home. You’ve got a job tomorrow, don’t cha? Silvia hates slackers.”

The image of Silvia suddenly popped inside your mind. You immediately bolted up, setting your cup on your seat. “Y... yeah. You’re right.”

Baji dipped his head in Mitsuya’s direction. “I’ll leave Chryso to ya. Call me if you need anything.” He saluted before nudging his head to the direction of the door.

You followed him but halted at the threshold. “Mitsuya, thank you.” The man nodded with a tired smile. Your eye journeyed to where Chryso was as your throat bobbed. “And… please take care of Chryso.”

“I will,” he reassured.

Your and Baji’s boots hoofed against the cobbled street. An awkward kind of silence wrapped the atmosphere around you like a thick blanket in summer. You tugged at your collar, clearing your throat quietly.

There were at least twenty questions running on your mind. However, the one that fell from your tongue was, “Is Chryso going to be fine?”

Baji puffed from his cig. “Hopefully. That fucker comes back stronger whenever that happens.”

Knotting your fingers together, you peeked at Baji. “Why does he do that, though? He needs the Ruby to survive.”

The streets were empty save for a few night owls smoking in dark alleyways. One stygian alley magnetized your attention, causing you to squint at a certain pathway, only to look elsewhere when you perceived a silhouette of someone crouching while obviously sucking on something.

“If they take it, they die. If they don’t, they die. It doesn’t make a difference,” Baji rasped, clouds of smoke covering his mouth.

He’s right. It didn’t. And that was the saddest part of the drug’s logic. It helps and destroys Kyrvas at the same time.

“Forgive me for asking this, but what happened to him five years ago in Ildico?”

It’s funny now that you have thought about it. What were the circumstances of you having your lives turned upside down five years ago? Did Chryso suffer a cruel fate like you?

“Say,” Baji muttered. His gaze was predatory. “Why are you here in Athalen?”

You stood still in front of your apartment building, vexed to some degree at the hint of accusation in the man’s tone. Nevertheless, you remained as composed as possible. Who knew? It’s worth a try. Perhaps Baji had already encountered the person you were searching for.

“I’m looking for Kazutora Hanemiya,” you divulged.

Baji’s eyes hardened at your face. Tension once again invaded the air around you. By his reaction, your hopes of finding Kazutora Hanemiya skyrocketed. You bit the insides of your cheek in your effort to mollify your raging heartbeat.

“What’s with the face?” you grumbled softly, peering at him. “Do you know him?”

Something switched and he was back on his usual self. The foolish and wide-toothed grin masking away his ominous expression seconds ago. “Kazutora Hanemiya? Hm, don’t think I do. Can you describe him for me?”

Once again, that embarrassment of not knowing a thing about Kazutora cocooned you. You sheepishly rubbed the back of your neck, avoiding his gaze. “I... I don’t know what Kazutora looks like.”

“You’re looking for someone you don’t know jackshit about?” His tone was satirical. And perhaps he had the right to be sarcastic.

Your ignominy deepened until you could feel heat suffusing your cheeks. “Not... none of your business.”

Although Chifuyu’s suggestion about getting help from Chryso and Baji wriggled in your brain, you couldn’t bring yourself to unfold the matter about your amnesia. Not yet. Not today when you were this bone-tired.

Baji chuckled while holding up his hands derisively. “Alright. No need to bite.”

“Whatever,” you groaned, circling on your heels to face the building. “Thanks for walking me home.”

“You’re always welcome.”

There was such warmth in the tone that had you turning sideways to quirk a brow up at him. Nevertheless, you stilled when you perceived something in his face. Gone was the cocky demeanor. What remained was a whirlpool of sadness in those eyes before he pirouetted and walked away.

TAGLIST. @primsonnn @sukirichi [taglist open!]

I was fascinated with your writing, so I came running to make you a request. Could you do a headcanon of Ran Haitani where the reader (Mikey's sister) dies instead of Emma?

I think I know what I'm doing for this! (Wow, thought this would be a short one, but this is NOT short at all.)

Recipe for Disaster: Ran Haitani x Fem!Reader

wc: 1.9k

tw: violence. angst

masterlist

song recommendation (I've changed this song FOUR times and it gets ANGSTIER every time):

Everything started off so cliche.

You were Mikey's older sister - a bastard of the Sano family, but his sister nonetheless. When he met you, he'd been barely twenty-seven, his violet eyes landing on your face with a certain hungry look about them. And you'd rejected him (which Ran didn't expect), preferring instead to trail behind Mikey as he worked on the bones of Bonten and became the head. You helped him think strategy, think about the risks, the implications, the rewards. You were Mikey's right-hand woman and sister; everyone knew that you were untouchable.

It just so happened that you fell into Ran's arms by accident.

Whether it had been good fortune or purely by chance, you needed his help, and he was quick to give it. He supposed the opposing gang member did himself a disservice when he crossed you, groceries in one hand and phone in the other.

"Ran, you already know what the plan is," you'd muttered into the phone, and he smiled, running a hand through his short black and white hair.

"Remind me, sweetheart."

"I'm going to remind you with my fist." Ran barked a laugh, leaning back slightly and closing his violet eyes.

"Oh, you are such a joy to tease," he began, but then heard the clatter of the phone on the pavement. Ran fully expected you to pick it up and apologize, but when he heard you scuffle around and shout angrily, he knew something had gone terribly wrong.

And with quick thinking and the use of his car's Bluetooth, he located you in the alleyway, being held at gunpoint by someone who looked unfamiliar to him.

"You should put that down," Ran called out, and you looked over at him, hands raised in fear. The man turned his eyes to Ran, then pointed the gun at him for good measure.

"Or what? Gonna fight me in that suit, pretty boy?" Ran whipped out his baton, standing with it resting on his shoulder. The man laughed, shaking his head at the tall man. "A fucking baton against a gun? What're you gonna do, beat me to death?"

As blood spattered on your shoes and Ran's face, you backed up, eyes glued to the dying gaze of the assailant. Ran didn't stop when he was dead. No, he beat the man until he was unrecognizable, barely a face in the pavement covered in brains and gore. But soon he finished, satisfied, and stood from the mess, holding a gloved hand out to you.

"Let's go before the cops arrive."

Then, he'd driven you back to the main house in silence, eyes looking over to your blank and dead eyes holding the previously spilled groceries in your lap. Upon arriving at the house, you finally spoke:

"I owe you."

Those three words tied you to Ran forever, and you slowly warmed up to his presence, telling Mikey what he did for you that day and how you owed him your life between puffs of a joint. Mikey rewarded Ran with a rare smile, then turned back to you, wondering how you were holding up before you shook him off and said you were "fine".

And Ran remembers.

He remembered everything from that day, even the bananas at the bottom of your bag meant for banana bread.

How your fingers trembled around the joint, how you would stand in the kitchen, just staring into the fridge for up to ten minutes, how you would strut around the house when others were looking as if nothing happened to you.

But something had, and only Ran could see it when you handed him a slice of bread, eyes dull and lifeless.

"Now, we're even."

_____________________________________________________________

It's a cold, winter night when he finds you sitting across from the fireplace, eyes staring into the flames with a blank look.

"Can't sleep?"

You look up at him with the same blank stare, brows furrowing at the sight of him in something other than a suit. "No, I'm fine," you reply, resting your cheek on your knees. "Just thinking about something."

"So, you can't sleep." Ran sits beside you on the carpet, eyes watching you carefully. "I've seen you come down here a few times. Don't you think that you should see someone you can talk to about it?"

"Why would I do that when I have you?"

The kiss itself isn't what bothers Ran. It's the reason why you kissed him that nags him for days. It's the way you smoothly evaded talking about your near-death experience- the one he rescued you from - and how he let you.

And for some unexplainable reason, that makes him angry. Not at you; you were blameless and innocent in his eyes. But at himself. He takes it out on every single person who crosses him - even going so far as to snap at Rindou over a trivial matter that he can't recall, even to this day.

"Ran." Rindou scrunched his face up, curling his lip up a fraction. "Who are you mad at?"

And finally, the twenty-eight-year-old stormed into your room, demanded to have you, and got his wish all in one evening. Your pagan ritual cast a spell over his mind, and he was no longer angry, not when he was with you.

Ran loved you.

He loved the way you'd make him sit on the ottoman at the foot of the bed and run your hands through his hair. He loved the way you would dance around the house and hum the chorus of a tune he didn't know - which he'd learn so he could hum it with you. He loved the feeling you brought out of him during your lovemaking; the way you'd adorn his hands with rings before he would meet with the other members of Bonten. And he loved the way you'd hold him as if he was the last man on earth, the only one who could save you from yourself and vice-versa.

Ran even said he loved you; the words gracing his tongue in a foreign, yet comforting way. You very nearly cried that night standing beside the dock with arms full of orchids, wrists covered with the expensive bangles he bought to hear you coming from a mile away, and the ring he'd purchased to present you with as a promise to keep loving you until the day he died.

But then...

But then Ran got a call from Rindou in the middle of a deal, which was a no-no. So he ignored it. And the next call. And the next call. Until finally, Mikey rang his phone.

"What?" he snapped, standing beside the penthouse window. "I'm in the middle of--"

"It's y/n. You need to get here as soon as you can."

And if Ran could have broken the window and flown away on wings of thread, feathers, and wax, he would have. His heart flew ahead of him, reaching the hospital long before he arrived at the valet and jumped out of the car, which was still in drive. Ran pushed a frail nurse, a doctor, and even a geriatric patient on his way to see you in the ICU, where you lay in a bed with your eyes closed. Mikey stood to your left, his eyes staring at your blank face with a clouded expression, but he left as soon as Ran entered, sweating through his suit and panting heavily.

"What happened?" Ran breathed, but Mikey flinched, bringing a shaking hand up to his face.

"Um..." How could Mikey tell the man that he'd watched as they pulled his sister's unconscious body from the wreckage of the car? "A car... a truck... I--" Ran pushed past the younger man, gritting his teeth and taking your limp hand in his, willing you to awaken now that he's here.

"I'm here," Ran whispered, pressing kisses to your bruised knuckles. "It's okay."

The sound of the monitors droned on throughout the night, and Ran forgot he was a person when the nurse came by to announce that visitor hours were over. No, he felt like a ghost, a shell of himself. He was in that bed with you, forced to breathe with the ventilator and brain activity monitored by the machines whirring around the room.

"No." That was the only word he muttered when the nurse repeated herself. "No, they're not." Mikey reappeared to slide the woman a wad of cash provided by Kokonoi, and the woman vanished into thin air. The door closed, leaving the two of you in a room, both of you slowly wasting away with the passing hours.

And in the morning, Rindou and Sanzu come, Kokonoi returns, and Mikey is there, hands staying in his pockets.

They whisper about Ran, they whisper about you, but Ran ignores it all until he hears the words of the doctor - though whispered to Mikey- clear as day:

"She's been brain-dead since the accident. It's up to you to take her off life-support." Ran turns his violet eyes to the man in the corner, a fierce glare freezing his gaze while Mikey weighs his options.

"She has no chance of living normally?"

"None. She's being kept alive by these machines. She won't be able to walk, talk, or breathe on her own." Mikey asked that question for Ran, the older man realizes. Mikey asked that question so he could see that there would be no hope for a miraculous revival.

Mikey asked that question so Ran could let you go.

"Take her off. I don't want any sister of mine living like this."

Rindou braces himself for an attack, and Sanzu fingers the gun tucked into his waistband. Even Kokonoi - who can't fight - clenches his fists, determined to hold Ran back from assaulting their leader.

But Ran lets you go.

Ran stands in the back at your funeral, not shedding a single tear as his brother stands beside him, watching your family fall apart over your death. Ran wants to fall apart - he really does - but the hollow void you've left him with swallows his sorrow, shoving it back to the depths of his stomach. He's still a shell of a man, even after your ashes have been interred, and your family has stopped wearing black. No one can touch him, no one can make him feel any better. He's just... empty.

It's only months later that Ran finds his sorrow in the back of the fridge, staring at the bananas that have gone bad. And he loses it, staring at the browning fruit with tears in his eyes as he recalls saving you from death. Why couldn't he do it this time? Why couldn't he just make all of the pain go away? Why couldn't he--

The recipe for banana bread is produced from the various different recipes in the blue binder of yours and Ran sobs pitifully as he mashes them, adds the flour, the eggs, the vanilla, the baking soda, and everything else until he's made a loaf of banana bread, sitting in the kitchen and staring at it while his stomach rejects the mere idea of eating it.

"Now, we're even."

Which makes him angry all over again.

So angry that he throws the whole thing in the trash and leaves the house to find someone to hurt because he's hurting.

And he wants to get even.

Daily convo with your filipino Izana boyfriend

poging pipino izana brainrot but this time hindi talaga sya sadboi, sweetboi lang 🥺✋

hey arba!!

i see you moved accounts for a fresh start, and i love your new blog's aesthetic sm!

if it's possible, can you please write a fem reader s/o who gives baji, inui, and souya a plushie? i think it would be super cute :D

» 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫(𝐬): 𝐤𝐞𝐢𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐣𝐢, 𝐬𝐞𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐮 𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐢, 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐲𝐚 𝐤𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐚

» 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐩𝐥𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞

» 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠(𝐬): 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠

» 𝐚/𝐧: 𝐚𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤 𝐲𝐨𝐮!! 🥺 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭, 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚 𝐜𝐮𝐭𝐞 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐚!! 𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐚𝐲, 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲. 𝐰𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧, 𝐢𝐝𝐤. 𝐢 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐲𝐚’𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐚 𝐛𝐢𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬’. 𝐢 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐨𝐤𝐚𝐲!

impulse-buying a plushie that reminded you of keisuke seemed like a good idea at the time. but now that you’ve made a scene in front of his friends by spontaneously flagging him down and enthusiastically guiding him off to a secluded alleyway, you’re starting to wonder if you’ve made the wrong decision. you’d felt ecstatic and merry when you first lifted it out of the bin and examined it, gushing to your friend about how it was perfect. now, you feel awkward standing there in front of keisuke with the plastic bag hidden behind your back. it’s only a plushie--it isn’t as big of a deal as you’ve made it out to be, nor is it worth all of the exuberance you approached him with. all you can do is stare at the golden embroidery on keisuke’s uniform, feeling the heat of embarrassment rise to your face.

“you okay, doll?” keisuke cranes his neck worriedly, angling his head to meet your eyes. “you look a bit uncomfortable.”

“oh, uh… yeah, i’m fine.” you avert your eyes a second time, earning a frown from the boy in front of you. “sorry for pulling you away like that. but… um, i got you something!” before you can lose the remainder of your confidence, you whisk the bag in front of you, the contents bumping against keisuke’s stomach as the bag dangles from your hand.

“really?” hearing the smile in keisuke’s voice, you raise your head a little. his eyes twinkle with anticipation as he accepts the bag from you. “what is it? can i look now?” without waiting for your permission, he opens the bag and fishes out the plushie you’d bought him. it’s a blue-eyed bat, complete with a set of reflective, silver fangs adorning its sewn mouth. keisuke’s face lights up with delight at the revelation, and his lips curve into a fascinated ‘o’ shape as he flips it over, observing it from all angles. you bite your lip and scrutinize his features, searching for the slightest, most fleeting shadow of distaste or rejection. but when you find nothing of the sort, you exhale a silent sigh of relief.

“it reminded me of you,” you tell him.

he turns his attention back to you long enough to offer you a toothy grin of gratitude. “thanks, babe!”  he squeezes the plushie between his fingers. “i had no clue they were so soft,” he marvels with a hushed murmur of captivation, poking at the embroidered teeth. “whoa, it has fangs! cool!” you can only laugh at the sight of your boyfriend completely spellbound by the large, glossy eyes and the synthetic fur. keisuke always was a simple man, and you knew that. but, you didn’t expect for this simple of a gift to appeal to him in such a way.

“hey, baji! you coming, man?” draken’s voice drawls from around the corner, punctuated by a set of slow, gradually approaching footsteps. “i know you’re with your wifey, but we have to go. there’s a meeting in half an hour, remember?

keisuke turns his head so fast that his ponytail smacks you in the face. “yeah, i know!” he calls back. when he shifts his attention back to you, who’s currently spitting and pulling a disgusted face at the taste of hair in your mouth, you notice that his cheeks are a bit flushed and he’s now got a death grip on the plushie. he leans forward, planting a kiss on your forehead with a chaste softness that betrays the stiffness and conflicted hesitation of his movements. “i have to go, but i’ll meet you back at my place after the meeting. go quickly so that you won’t have to walk in the dark. it’s dangerous at night.” he looks down at the bat in his hands almost regretfully. “i… i don’t know how intense the meeting is going to be, so can you take keisuke jr. with you? i don’t want him to get stepped on.”

“keisuke jr.?” you barely manage to choke back your laughter, lifting an inquisitive brow.

“well, yeah, he’s our son now.” he grins down at the plushie for a moment before relinquishing it to you. “we have to practice for later, don’t we?” 

wait.

“baji!” draken shouts again.

“keep your dick in your pants! i’m coming!” keisuke gripes over his shoulder. with a final kiss to your cheek, he turns on his heel and jogs back to his gang, leaving you with a million questions and a face burning hotter than concrete in the summertime.

seishu’s apartment doors clicks softly behind you as you tiptoe past the threshold, doing your best to be as silent as physically possible as you remove your shoes and keep the gift-wrapped paper bag in your hands from rustling too loudly. kokonoi had informed you that seishu wouldn’t be home at this time, but you know better than to trust any of his information at face value. it’d be better to be as quiet as possible, regardless. after all, your plan was to slip in using the key seishu had lent you a few nights ago, put his birthday present on the couch, and then dip to surprise him at the park where kokonoi had claimed he’d be. regardless, your plan is banking on whether or not his information is accurate…

which is why your soul damn-near leaves your body when you suddenly see seishu silently step from the hallway leading off to his bedroom. “motherf--” you slap a hand over your lips and stumble back, barely managing to stifle a startled shriek. “seishu?” you gasp into your hand. he’s standing there dressed in loose-fitting, wrinkled sweats, lips parted slightly and eyes round with shock at the sight of you sneaking around his apartment like the world’s worst criminal. still, you can see that his eyes are hazy with remnants of slumber and his blonde hair is in a disarray, random strands sticking up from his head at odd angles. you all but stagger over to lean on his couch, clapping a hand over your heart as it thrums rapidly against your palm. “what the hell--” your ears are still burning with the lingering effects of fear, and you glare at him with misguided anger. “what are you doing here?”

koko, what happened?

“well, i’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but this is my apartment.” the corners of his lips tilt upward in a small, borderline sleepy smile. “if anything, what are you doing here? breaking in and sneaking around someone’s apartment is a crime, you know.” he teases.

“i still have the key you gave me.” after your heart rate returns to normal, you straighten up and dig the key from your jacket pocket, placing it on the arm of the couch. “i used it to get in, so technically, i didn’t break in.”

“still, what are you--” his eyes widen when he zeroes in on the gift you’re still clasping to your chest from when you toed off your shoes. all traces of fatigue vanish from his gaze as he approaches you slowly, almost reluctantly. “is that for me?”

truth be told, seishu didn’t expect you to remember his birthday. he’d only told you once, and it was when you were both half-asleep on the floor of your bedroom, poking fun at shitty action comics and snickering while you compared each other to the ugliest monsters in the stories. he never really made a big deal about his birthday, anyway. it was always kokonoi who arranged things and made sure that everyone knew about it, being the flashier and more extravagant of the pair. that being said, seishu didn’t mind if you’d forgotten it. he wouldn’t have blamed you, anyway. still, he couldn’t help but secretly hold on to that tiny sliver of hope that you’d remember. but, when you didn’t text him happy birthday or call him, he’d resigned himself to accepting that you’d forgotten and promptly went back to sleep.

but now, here you are, standing in his apartment, holding a gift specifically for him and looking flustered and defeated at your failed plan to surprise him. you didn’t forget. his heart swells in his chest at the realization. you’re too cute.

“man,” you whine, “i wanted it to be a surprise! koko said you weren’t going to be here, so i was going to leave it and then go meet you at the park where he’d said you’d be. it’s your birthday present.”

“you got me a present?” seishu wonders aloud, eyes flickering to yours. you don’t say anything and merely turn it over to him, letting him squish it between his hands and weigh it in his palms to try to determine what it could be. “can i open it?” he looks to you once more for permission, and when you nod excitedly, he carefully unwraps it.

resting in his palms is a plushie of a light-furred persian cat with startlingly blue eyes. you wait for his reaction, but all he does is stare down at it with an expression you determine to be blank. immediately, you feel your stomach twist, doubt causing your smile to wither. does he not like it? does he not want a plushie? does he suddenly not like cats? is this secretly some kind of insult to him? you’re about to say something when he abruptly lifts his head, his unveiled expression causing you to sigh in relieved surprise. his eyes are glowing with a soft warmth, and his smile is an easy one born from contentment and happiness. it’s more prominent and radiant than his usual one; and the longer you watch his stoic, reserved expression unravel into something akin to youthful joy, the more you want to wrap him up in your arms and never let go. he smooths his fingers over the fur, his smile gradually soothing to match the gentleness in his eyes and the kiss of scarlet against his cheeks.

“thank you, love.” seishu murmurs. he shifts his eyes to you and leans forward, pressing a slow kiss to your forehead. “it’s perfect. it even kind of looks like me. here, look at the eyes…”

“that’s what i was thinking!” you agree. he laughs quietly.

you certainly weren’t anticipating this kind of reaction from him. you’d expected a nod and a quiet word of gratitude, but with the way he was quietly fawning over the stuffed animal and examining it like a child during christmas, it was almost as if--

“i’ve never had one of these before,” seishu confirms your assumptions. “akane did, but i never got to play with them.” he squeezes it once before handing it to you. “here, feel how soft it is. get a squeeze in.”

“i already felt it when i bought it, babe,” you shake your head with a smile. “it’s all yours.”

“thank you for this, (reader),” his smile is earnest. “i guess i’ve really been missing out, huh?”

“well, not anymore.” you assure him. “happy birthday, sei. you deserve it.”

mounting the front steps of the kawata family’s home, you spot the front door creaking open and, in a moment of alarm, shove the plushie in your hands behind your back, only to heave a sigh of relief when you see nahoya step outside. no words are exchanged, and he doesn’t even seem mildly surprised to see you standing there. it’s no wonder; you and souya are together so often that your presence in the kawata household has become almost expected. having identified the newcomer as the wrong twin, you let your hands fall back to your side. with a nod of acknowledgement and a hand propping open the door, nahoya lets you inside before heading the opposite direction.

you locate souya’s room with ease and knock gently on the door, doing your best to keep from startling him. you’d come here on a whim after a shopping spree, having impetuously bought a plushie that reminded you of your boyfriend and wanting to deliver it to him as soon as possible. in hindsight, you probably should have let souya know in advance that you were coming.

still, you hear his voice on the other side of the door. “hello?”

“hey, souya babe, it’s me!” you call back. “sorry i didn’t let you know that i was coming. but, i have something for you!”

“ah! u-uh, come in!” his words are nearly drowned out by the sudden rustling of clothing and a couple heavy thuds beyond the door, implying that he isn’t exactly in a state decent enough for him to feel comfortable with you entering, regardless of his words. so, you wait until the noises of effort cease before you push open the door. you keep the plushie you’d bought for him out of sight, tucked behind your back with your free hand.

souya is sitting attentively at the edge of his bed with his hands braced on his knees. however, his breathing is somewhat labored, his closet door is ajar, his bedsheets are rumpled as if they’d been kicked off in a hurry, and you’re pretty sure that his shirt is on backwards. for a moment, you falter at his suspicious behavior and cast a glance toward his closet, almost accidentally exposing your gift for him in the process.

“sorry…” he mumbles, causing your eyes to flick back to him. “i wasn’t dressed.”

you smile silently to yourself. of course. his words should have reassured you, but your suspicions were shallowly rooted and as fleeting as a wisp of smoke there’s nothing to reassure you of. you know that souya loves you, but he’s so cute that you can’t help but poke fun at him. you lean forward a bit, raising a teasing brow. “careful, souya. it looked pretty suspicious when i came in. almost as if you were with… someone else.” you tip your head with faux inquiry.

“what do you mean..?” souya takes a second to process your implication, but when it finally registers, his eyes widen with alarm and he rockets to his feet. “n-no!” he gasps out. “i promise, that’s not what i was doing!” you merely hum and scan him from head-to-toe with a tight press of your lips, deciding to drag out your joke for just a tad bit longer. he seems to deflate under your distrustful eyes, and your eyes slowly round with horror when you see your boyfriend beginning to tear up. “i… i promise…” pearls of frustration and fear coalesce along his lashes and threaten to wash down his cheeks, obviously blurring his vision when he fumbles for his phone on the nightstand. “here! you can… here, check my phone!” he scrambles to unlock it with trembling hands. “you can look at anything you--”

that’s when you rush forward, engulfing him in your arms and sandwiching his phone in between you. your heart hammers away at your ribcage as you stare at the wall behind him with wide eyes, feeling him sag against you and clutch at your shirt while he hiccups and sniffles into your shoulder. “holy shit, souya…” you whisper. “i was just kidding, babe. i was just kidding.” you pull away far enough to press a kiss to his cheek, speaking softly--earnestly--against his skin. “i’m so sorry. i didn’t know that it would upset you this much.”

“wait, so…” his hands still gripping your shirt, souya leans away to search your face with glistening eyes for any lingering signs of distrust or displeasure. he looks so distraught and confused that you want to kick yourself. you’d never accused him of being unfaithful before, even as a joke. you had no idea that he would get so emotional about it. “you’re not mad?”

“no, baby,” you cradle his face between your palms and trail a line of kisses down the single tear track adorning his cheek. he sniffs, and you smile reassuringly. “i was just kidding. i promise. i don’t think you were being disloyal. i’m so sorry that i upset you.”

“you’re so mean.” he grumbles, planting his face back into your shoulder. “i thought you were mad at me. i thought you were serious about me cheating on you.”

“no, i’m sorry for being mean,” you coo, smoothing your hand over the nape of his neck. “here, i got something for you. i was going to make you wait, but since i was being mean, i’ll give it to you now. is that okay?”

“yeah…” with a begrudging sigh, he releases you, allowing you to turn and pick up the plushie that’d fallen to the floor in your haste to embrace him. “surprise!”

you present to him a white-furred pomeranian plushie with a perpetual yet arguably adorable snarl on its face, both the irises of its beady eyes and pawprints a shade of blue identical to the color of souya’s hair. you watch with relief as souya’s sulky expression soften into one of wonder, the tears in his eyes dissipating to reveal a set of round eyes glowing with enchantment. he takes the plushie into his hands and stares directly into its eyes.

“you got this for me?” he murmurs, borderline fascinated with how similar their trademark expressions are. a light shade of pink dusts his cheeks, tempering his usual sneer and making him appear more and more like the kind-hearted boy he truly is. he averts his eyes and mumbles to himself that you don’t quite catch, clearly flustered and struggling to communicate his gratitude in a way that won’t embarrass him. “thank you for… this… i really like it. it’s nice.”

“i’m glad you like it!” you respond, voice light with merriment and satisfaction. souya doesn’t reply, seemingly bewitched by the plushie as he squeezes and flips it over in his hands. “is it soft?” when he nods sheepishly, you continue hopefully. “do you forgive me?”

“mhm,” he hums, and you fist-pump dramatically. “there’s leftover pasta in the fridge. nahoya made it. do you want some?” he finally looks at you. shy adoration and chaste love swirl amidst his turquoise gaze, glimmering like an opalescent stone lost at the bottom of the river, waiting for the right person to pick it up and cherish it until it can freely shine as brightly as possible. you feel your heart begin to melt all over again.

“yes, please,” you nod energetically. “the walk over made me hungry.”

you both make for the door, only for you to pause when you notice that he’s still holding the plushie. “hey, souya? you can leave that here, you know.”

he shakes his head. “yeah, i know, but...” he declines, “i want to carry it.”

yep, you’re a goner.

NAHOYAS HANDS CANONLY LOOK LIKE THIS FIGHT ME ON IT???