
I'm a healer, but...
285 posts
Imtiredimtiredimtiredimtiredimti - Yes. Control. Chilli. I Have It All. - Tumblr Blog

Actually deeply upset that I haven't seen the funniest tweet about this whole thing reposted here yet smh my fucking head.

fan edit i made of squidward meal prepping
started listening to ethics town on episode 2 and you're telling me this suspicious man (who somehow knows the secret shady dealings of the town mayors murder and organ harvesting plan) is called January and he vapes
lad what??? this is a comedy there's no other explanation
also not remembering your town having a beach makes me feel better about not knowing my country has trains
people keep trying to make "ladies and gentlemen" more inclusive.
I think we should go the other way around.
make more and more weird false dichotomies in greetings. "gamers and pianists". "oil painters and swordsmen". "vexillologists and entomologists". "chess masters and diamond artificers". "accountants and gendered individuals".
we need to be dropping shit into formal meetings to make people say "wait what? which one am I?"




If i had a nickel for every time someone thought Phil was Dan’s dad, i’d have 2 nickels which isn’t a lot but its weird that it happened twice
bonus: the tweet about the first incident

in my head the star wars equivalent of tswift is some human woman named tay’lor spiff or something and her stans are losing their minds over theories that she’s secretly a jedi singing about the horrors of war, even though she’s from a neutral system that hasn’t seen so much as a moral panic in 50 years
By Mj.majcha on Instagram.
via indiarosecrawford
Frog Paints a Water Lily Pond 🪷🎨🐸
𝑓ₒᵣ ⲕᵢ𝑛𝑔 ₐ𝑛𝑑 𝑐ₒ𝑡𝑡ₐ𝑔ₑ
Daniel, it appears I have won us another free iPhone 15! Yes, I’ve given them your address and banking information. To aid in the collection of our prize. Daniel— do NOT raise your voice to me, Daniel. You forget yourself. Why must you always belittle my accomplishments? Beloved, we need only pay shipping

the transition im crying
my new job is so good except for this part


I’m obsessed with this man
eating cake and drinking coffee on a train brendan gleeson your days are numbered
can i come over and implant false memories of us being childhood friends?
the wording on this Jack russell vid beamed a permanent mark onto my brain
that dude in the cupboard in Nobody's Home
this image is making me throw up with laughter for some reason

Washington in Hamilton
Despair is easy, hope is hard. And brother, I like to stay hard
thinking abt how i audibly went "omg rowena!!! :DDD" when night nurse was introduced (without seeing her face) i will never escape supernatural
why they have address?
You are one of the most dangerous villain in the world of heroes, also known as The Death. One day you received a letter from Make-A-Wish requesting you to visit a sick child.
Happy ace day y'all
