Hihihi I Have A Thought !! Jeongin's Reaction When He Found Out That Reader Is A Camgirl

hihihi I have a thought !! Jeongin's reaction when he found out that reader is a camgirl

ᵎ　🍶　⊹ camera shy, y. jeongin

꒰ 🗯️ ꒱ 𝗌𝗅𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝗉𝖾𝗋𝗏 𝗋𝗈𝗈𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗍𝖾!𝗃𝖾𝗈𝗇𝗀𝗂𝗇，𝗌𝗆𝗎𝗍 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖺 𝗌𝗉𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗄𝗅𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝗉𝗅𝗈𝗍，𝖼𝖺𝗆𝗀𝗂𝗋𝗅!𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋，𝖽𝖾𝗀𝗋𝖺𝖽𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇，𝗁𝖾 𝗂𝗌 𝗌𝗅𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍𝗅𝗒 𝗆𝖾𝖺𝗇，𝗋𝗈𝗈𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗍𝖾𝗌 𝗍𝗈 ???，𝗆𝖺𝗌𝗍𝗎𝗋𝖻𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇，𝗎𝗌𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝗍𝗈𝗒𝗌，𝗃𝖾𝗈𝗇𝗀𝗂𝗇 𝗌𝗉𝗂𝖾𝗌 𝗈𝗇 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝖺 𝖻𝗂𝗍，𝗎𝗇𝖾𝖽𝗂𝗍𝖾𝖽．

[ 𝗇𝗈𝗍𝖾 ] 𝗍𝗒𝗌𝗆 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗋𝖾𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 <𝟥 𝗂𝗍 𝗍𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝖺 𝗌𝖾𝖼𝗈𝗇𝖽 𝗍𝗈 𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗉𝗈𝗇𝖽 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝗒𝖺 𝗀𝗈 <𝟥 𝗂 𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖾 𝗂𝗍𝗌 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗂 𝗁𝖺𝖽 𝖿𝗎𝗇 𝗐𝗋𝗂𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗂𝗍 𝖺𝗍 𝟤 𝖺𝗆 𝗅𝗈𝗅 !!

[ 𝟦．𝟤𝗄 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝖽𝗌 ] ✩ [ 𝖽𝗈 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝗋𝖾𝗉𝗈𝗌𝗍 ] ✩ [ 𝗆．𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍 ]

HE’S JUST your roommate. And as your roommate, he wasn't shy to just walk right into your room, ready to ask you about the mess in the kitchen or the curling iron you left in the bathroom the two of you shared. As your roommate he never expected to walk into your bedroom and see you spread wide in front of your desk computer, playing with yourself and talking to the camera.

Jeongin's jaw dropped straight to hell, his eyes practically bulging as he stared. It was impossible to turn away; it was like his gaze was glued to you. The way your fingers pressed into your clit like a button, your lips pressed together hard as you paused to breathe. Jeongin didn't know how to form sober thoughts anymore. He felt drunk and dizzy while staring at you, his mind was slurred and even though he wasn't saying anything, he felt he wasn't making sense.

You hadn't noticed him standing in the doorway, surprisingly. Your eyes were still seductively staring into the screen, gaze falling to every other comment, smirking at some of the more desperate ones.

You spoke slowly, like you wanted everyone there to understand, even Jeongin.

"I'm all wet just for youuu." Your voice fell into a soft whine, sing-song like as you smile. Jeongin doesn't know why but your words go straight to his dick and he braced himself on the wall, fearing he'd lose his balance.

You continued, still somehow unaware of Jeongin's presence. It didn't help that the room was dark apart from the dim light of your desktop and the pale bulb of your bedside lamp. Your head was facing the screen entirely, too focused to even notice his watching figure on the sidelines.

You weren't anything like the Y/N he usually saw. Normally you were quiet and a bit shy, he'd never take you for the type to be so lewd behind the scenes. It was dangerous the duality you secretly held. Your eyes were low and dark under the limited light, lips glossed and shiny, your pretty body cutely dressed in something that Jeongin never knew he needed to see. A pale pink lingerie set, gorgeous around your curve with bows on every line of lace, sewn into the straps and panties cutely. All this and Jeongin's mouth watered like a dog; shamefully, he was already hard,embarrassingly so.

You hissed as you read something, assuming to be someone's comment out loud, "You look so good right now, that set suits you," You smiled sweetly like it was any other compliment, your cheeks dimpled and hot, "Thank you, I picked it out for you."

Jeongin's brain went foggy again. If he could get his feet to work he would've left already, embarrassed yet painfully hard. He wished he could find the strength to turn around and fix himself up— ease the burden of blood rushing to his cock. You were doing something to him he didn't except. He's watching you like god herself had divined right before him; he's thinking like Satan had run his fingers along his skin and tainted his mind. He felt dirty, he felt like perverted loser as he stood frozen watching you.

You bit your lip, sucking in a breath of air softly as your fingers slid down your slid, poking daintily at your hole.

"I actually have a surprise for you guys," You began with a soft smile, eyes a little hazy as you reached over your desk. You pulled out of what seemed to be thin air, a hot pink dildo, the color harsh and bright. Jeongin almost choked at the sight, the color, the length, the idea of you putting that into yourself— it felt like a fever dream to witness, "Isn't it pretty? I bought it yesterday... should I try it on stream?"

Jeongin listened like he was an avid viewer; like he himself had paid the same money those people on the stream had to see you. Once again a wave of shame flushed across him, cheeks reddening but feet remaining concrete on the floor.

"Yeah? Okay," You seemed entirely too happy, leaning back in your chair and giving the viewers once again an amazing view. Your tits pressed together by your arms, your panties on you right ankle, dangling forgotten and free, "It's a bit bigger than I'd normally buy... I wonder if it'll even fit..."

Your eyes raised back to the screen and for a second Jeongin saw that shy girl he knew. Your eyes were widened and your lips damp and parted. It was a gorgeous sight and he felt a sudden urge to walk over there and grab your face, maybe even make you take all of him for those viewers to see. The power you held over him right now was insane and you didn't even know it.

You bit your lip with your eyebrows pressed together, bringing the thick silicone to your pussy, rubbing it along your clit whilst simultaneously collecting your own essence along the shaft.

Jeongin's eyes followed every movement you made; enamored as you held the toy to your hole now, sucking in a breath as you slipped it inside of you slowly, etching deeper and deeper until the majority of it disappeared inside of you.

Jeongin let out an audible groan, somehow you hadn't heard it; your head leaned back and eyes shut, embracing the feeling as your walls snugly held the dildo in place.

"F-fuck," You cried out softly, lifting your head back to the screen, "It feels so good... so much bigger t-than usual."

Jeongin could barely see your screen but he just knew the chat was exploding. Your eyes tried to follow each one but you were already growing woozy from the feeling; Jeongin could see it.

"O-oh," You whimpered as you rolled your hips off the chair, struggling to maintain yourself for the camera. You read a comment, "Wish you were taking my cock right now instead of that overpriced p-plastic," You nodded eagerly, eyes fluttery as another whine fell past your lips, "Me too, wish I had real dick right now... fuck."

Jeongin almost opened his mouth to speak before he caught himself; mouth too dry to even say anything to begin with.

"Can you moan a little louder for us?" You read a comment in a soft whispery voice. You nodded at this and let out your prettiest moan, hand moving the dildo in and out of your pussy in steady motions. Your head lulled backward, beginning to lose focus on the screen, "M' gonna cum fast tonight— fuck, feels s'good."

Jeongin's hand was softly caressing himself through his sweats, the tips of his ears stained a shade of red. His eyes scanned over your entire body; the lace that hugged your tits, the hot pink dildo disappearing then reappearing from your cunt, the squish in your belly and the swollen tint of your lips. He bit his lips, afraid he'd say something stupid if he didn't.

"Fu-fuck— can I? Can I cum?" You asked the stream, the people watching the lewd image before them. You whimpered again, thighs shaking and threatening to close.

You read the chat, grateful for the kindness tonight as the chat flooded with praise and yes's.

In his head, Jeongin was pleading with you to cum, his eyes fixed on your twitching kissy as you began to up your pace. You rapidly pushed the toy into you over and over again; moans getting more frequent and whinier.

You moaned out something incoherent and whiny, your head falling back, exposing your chest hidden beneath the thin veil of lace. Your orgasm came with no warnings, your moans expertly loud and helpless as you fucked yourself through your high.

All the while Jeongin palmed his bulge and wondered how he'd never seen you like this sooner. It had to be the best thing he'd ever seen.

Your high came in intervals, your head falling back and thighs twitching. Jeongin watched you lean your own head back, tilt it his direction and moan, eyes locking on hiss and in your orgasm-filled daze your hand reached out to him, making Jeongin's heart (and dick) lurch.

Your eyes glossy and your chest heaving as you mewled and moaned something that couldn't be understood; all the while your eyes on Jeongin, now aware of his presence and reaching for him with grabby, shaky fingertips.

"I-Innie—" You practically moaned his name as your orgasm fell, ending as you shook helplessly. You continued pushing the dildo into yourself, shame out the window as you continued to hold your gaze. Jeongin couldn't break his eyes away.

"Fuck," He huffed, eyes wide, trying to collect what little dignity he had left, "Sorry— I'll go—"

You shook your head, somehow already knowing exactly what was going on. Your eyes fell to his hand that tried (and failed) to cover his erection, the denim of his pants visibly uncomfortable around his hard cock. You reached again, teary eyes now as you overstimulated yourself with your dildo, still brave enough to stare at him.

His eyes. They were slender and a little nervous yet equally so aroused and dark. The darkness of the room didn't help; making him look especially enticing. While any other night you'd gladly take the chance to have him, especially tonight.

From Jeongin's messy, dyed hair to his expensive facial features. High cheekbones and dangerously pretty eyes, lips soft and pink with the prettiest Cupids bow. Not to mention his beautifully carved body, broad shoulders and chest hidden beneath the thickness of his hoodie. You caught glimpses of his figure all the time, and each time you were drooling in your mind for him.

"Innie... please." The adrenaline of an orgasm gave you the courage to call for him. To plead with him to stay. The chat was exploding with questions, one after the other, donation after donation with notes asking who you were talking to. Your boyfriend? A friend? They were curious, who is this mystery person you're calling out to? Your shaky hands reached for him longingly and the viewers couldn't see but Jeongin didn't hesitate to step toward you, finally being able to pick up his feet.

When Jeongin came on screen all that was visible were his arms and his body, face excluded and cut off screen just at his jaw. The chat was exploding now more than ever, the notification of donations being ignored as the two of you held a longing stare. It was silent, your legs still spread and your mind foggy. Jeongin's vision was blurred but he could make you out so much clearer than before. The dimness no longer shrouded your beauty but highlighted it. Your sweaty chest, your lustful eyes.

He stared and to you it made you sober up a bit, wondering if you'd made the wrong move, but to him be was taking it all in before he grabbed you and bent you over the table. Jeongin cupped your chin, fingers slightly gripping the soft flesh and squishing your lips into a pout.

He didn't care that cameras were rolling, nor that hundreds if not thousands of people were watching the two of you right now. Thinking about it was pointless anyway— all he wanted to do was have his way with you.

"Jeongin..."

You asked quietly, wishing you hadn't said anything now. Afraid of what he was going to say; would he ridicule you? Call you a good for nothing whore and stampede out of the room? Why was he staring into your eyes so deeply? How was he so hot even when you could barely make out his eyes beneath the shroud of dark?

"I'm thinking..." Jeongin stated simply, voice barely audible by viewers.

Your body was shaky and so was your breath, "About... what?" You bit your lip, speech slurred by the way he held your face.

Jeongin's breath fanned your face, warming it even further, sweat beginning to dribble down your temple just from his stare alone.

"All the ways I could fuck you right now."

You practically moaned at the sound of his voice, let alone his words. Such nasty, lewd words that lingered in the air for a minute, a flume of tension rising around the two of you. It was undeniable. You didn't even bother to say more, just staring up at him wide eyed, silently daring him to do it; show you the best he's got. Show everyone watching behind their screens what he could really do.

Jeongin didn't hesitate, bringing you upward, all of his once raging shyness gone. He's got the opportunity and he'd call himself and idiot if he let it pass him by. He flipped you toward the screen, your face inches away as you leaned on your hands, tits threatening to spill from their pink lace homes. You moaned as his hands laced through your hair, digging into your scalp then dragging through the half-made knots. You winced when he wrapped an arm around your waist, adjusting you to his liking, moaning again as he pressed his thick, hot bulge against your backside.

You moaned but it wasn't for the camera this time. You don't know why but Jeongin had this effect on you; something you hoped you'd get to experience again after this.

"Oh— put it in— please, please," You begged outwardly with starry eyes, avoiding your reflection in the monitor and instead staring at his clothed chest, noticing the way his chest rose and fell erratically, "Innie, I can't— want you so bad, p-please!" Your voice was akin to a sob now, breathless as he watched your figure squirm and writhe beneath him.

He swore it altered the chemistry in his brain, ultimately frying it. He saw colors he'd never seen before, he tasted things he'd never tasted before this very moment. All of it was thanks to you.

Those pretty sounds you made eggend him on further, giving him the confidence to speak, "Baby... just look at the camera and hold still."

His voice was nonchalant and demanding but he swore on the inside he was about to combust. His eyes fell to your pretty ass, round cheeks curved up as your back arched; his dick slotted so perfectly between them, the bulge itching to be freed and find it's place in your cute body.

"Take this thing out..." Jeongin pulled the dildo out of you, chuckling at the sight of how much cum fell from the tip, sticky and leaking on your ass and his hands. He tossed it to the side with little care for where it landed; staring back at your cunt again, this time ogling at your cunt peeking through the side of your panties, wetness dripping down your thighs now. He sucked in a breath and a groan, eyes going to the screen as he realized he was on camera again.

"Innie... just fuck me already." You pushed your ass back against him, rubbing mindlessly against his bulge. Jeongin was never one to obey so easily, but this time he swore he'd never untied his sweats faster. He just had to have you right this instant, to fuck you in front of thousands and show them that you have what they'll never get: you.

He himself wasn't even sure if he was dreaming or not. Whether this was real or fake didn't matter to him now— all he cared about was the feeling of your ass pressed against him. God, was it something he could get used to. Just the sight alone left him quaking, pretty and round and daintily covered by the thin veil of pink lace. Leaving nothing to the imagination, only making his cock twitch in his pants.

"You're such a slut," Jeongin's voice was grating like sandpaper on wood, making your stomach flip and your knees shake, "Showing yourself off to the world like this... so wet too, fuck." Jeongin could barely formulate the words as his mind raced; all be could think of was all the things he wanted to do to you.

You whined at his words, clearly wanting to bite back only to receive a tap on your ass. Somewhat of a warning of what his big hands could do if you acted out. You let out a soft shriek that dissipated into a content sigh.

"Using a nasty little toy on yourself isn't gonna do much, sugar..." Jeongin was bending you further into your desk, the bottom half of his face appearing on screen as he whispered in your ear, "Wouldn't you rather have the real thing? Wouldn't you rather have me fill this pretty cunt up for you instead?"

You were quick to respond, nodding your head as you tried to turn your head to face him. He chuckled, nodding as well like a taunt.

"Tell them all then," Jeongin pointed to the screen. The feeling was utter humiliation— or at least it would be if you cared enough. If the bulge of his cock wasn't pressing deliciously against your cunt, applying just enough pressure to your clit. You weakly turned to the screen, mouth wet as saliva pooled in the corner of your lips.

The chat was spamming with questions still. Begging to know who this guy was and why he had shown up suddenly. Why they couldn't make out his face and why he was touching you. They were definitely jealous as he ran a hand up your spine, loving the way you reacted to him and arched your back.

"I-Innie's... he's gonna fuck m'now..." You stared blurry eyed at the screen, listening to the sound of Jeongin shuffling and pulling his dick out from his boxers, slipping his tip up and down your folds. He listened to you continue, "He's— he's gonna fuck me for y-you all." You wiggled your ass slowly with a sly chuckle, pressed your lips together when he suddenly grabbed you. His fingers were rough and his eyes were straight on your ass. His cock leaking against your ass as he adjusted you to his liking.

"Go on." He ordered. The calm yet demeaning sound of his voice making you itch to feel him.

"Can't wait to feel it. Been wanting to since foreverrr," You continued now, "Fuck, want it so—"

Jeongin pushed into you suddenly, making you choke on your words, spit dribbling out the side of your mouth. Evidently shutting you up, he laughed and gave your ass a nice rub. But inside his nonchalant, almost mean demeanor he was losing it.

Never had Jeongin thought he'd be perfectly snug between your thighs inside your gummy walls. Was it something he'd find himself thinking about randomly? All the time. Had he ever thought his fantasies would become a reality? No, not at all. But right now he was reveling in the moment, every breath was like his final, taking it in slow as he tried to think straight. You were squeezing him impossibly good, almost painful like you were choking his poor dick.

Meanwhile, your brain was turning to mush, staring blankly ahead at the screen, eyes too lazy to refocus on the spamming chat. Mostly egging you both on, instructing things to do as if it were their own personal game.

Jeongin wondered how his shy roommate, the girl who was meek and quiet in public, had managed to keep such a dangerously attractive secret for so long. Had you always done this? Was this a new thing? So many questions yet all at once all he needed was to feel you more.

So he gripped your waist, focusing on the pleasure of you, "Fuck, s'better than I imagined."

You nodded softly, already whimpering and moaning between each breath.

Jeongin's eyes were shielded by his hair as he read some of the comments, flabbergasted by some of the shit they were saying. Even more shocked by the amount of money reeling in now. Before his eyes, flashes of donations and notifications beamed over the screen like little surprises.

Jeongin decided in that moment to give the viewers what they want. He bit his lip as he slowly slid out, leaving his leaky red tip in before pushing back in. He was slow and deliberate, all the while his hands ran up and down your waist, reaching and grabbing for any part of you he could.

His eyes came across a specific comment; call her a slut.

Jeongin had no problem doing that, so he lowered a hand to your jaw, gripping your poor, flushed skin and angling your head toward the camera. Your eyes were struggling to stay open and your mouth hung agape. "Fucking slut... desperate to get fucked in front of all these people... nasty aren't you?"

You didn't deny it, instead whimpering at a particularly sharp thrust inside of you. Your nails were digging into the desk, your face felt hot, and your body ached already, "Y-yes."

"What's that?" Jeongin only said it to watch the way you stammered, almost embarrassed to repeat yourself.

"Yes!"

"That's more like it. Speak up, don't hide your sounds, slut."

Jeongin obeyed the comments religiously; even chanting little moans like church hymns. He wasn't gentle, leaving you babbling and drooling. He wasn't even sure you realize you were still displayed on screen for everyone to see. His hands instinctively glided up your body as his eyes scanned the chat once again, looking for inspiration, something to drive you wild with. Satisfy whatever thirst was brewing in the chat.

He kept his moans to himself, slowly losing it each time he listened to your delicious sounds.

Jeongin smirked at another comment; how does it feel?

“See that?” Jeongin pointed your head at the monitor, chuckling when you whispered out a moan, “They’re asking you how it feels. Go on, tell them, slut.” He gave you a particularly harsh thrust, similar to a gentle nudge forward.

Your fingers curled around the edges of the desk, the little table rocking slightly as he slowed his hips down; your body reacting with little pushes back against his hips. Jeongin stared at the screen impatiently, watching as you tried to focus your poor, watery eyes.

“I— I can’t,” You struggled, feeling his strong arm wrapping around your torso, “So deep…”

Jeongin bit his lip, sliding his hand up to grip the back of your neck, pulling you backward. He wasn’t in the mood to be patient anymore; he wanted to fuck you. He was so close and you saying shit like that didn’t help him at all. By the way you were flinching and preening, his name melting off your tongue and heating the air, had his mind slipping. Jeongin gripped your body tightly against his chest, not a care for how the camera was catching you two— you both sweaty and lust filled. Your body reacting with little jerks each time his cock slipped into you completely from sensitivity; prior orgasms giving you the blessing of a fast approaching orgasm.

Jeongin’s hot breath fanned your face, “You close? Tell me, fuck, c’mon.”

You nodded, his fingers grazing up your jaw, “So close… right there, r-right there!” You jaw hung open, little ‘ah’s’ filling the air, whiny and addicting. Jeongin was groaning, lost in the pool of his own pleasure as you squeezed him just right.

“Cum on my cock,” Jeongin groaned breathlessly, rocking you along with his desperate thrusts, “Oh— fuck, s’tight, dammit!”

You came so hard the world went white; blurring your mind and sending you in a spiral of pure bliss. Your body was twitching, going limp in his arms like jelly. His eyes squeezing shut as you did so, curling his toes to keep his orgasm in check.

Before your orgasm was fully done he was pulling out and bending you forward into the desk again, not caring for the things along the table bruising your skin. He pushing you into the wood by the back of your head, slender fingers curling in your hair. He fucked the last of his stamina into his fist, jerking himself off until his dick spurt pretty ropes of pearly cum, thick and steaming along your skin as it landed in gorgeous patterns.

You panted into the desk, eyes focusing on the random corner beside the wall, your mind coming down from a high that left you practically glitching. Jeongin stood up with slumped shoulders, hand dropping his flaccid dick as he panted out little breaths.

Your lips hung wide as realization slowly hit. Usually you’d do a quick goodbye for your viewers, maybe thanking them or doing something small. But this time your body reacted faster than your brain could properly function. You raised your shaky arm to the monitor and simply shut the whole device off, eyes slowly widening, trailing toward the boy behind you.

Your own roommate. Someone you considered a pretty close friend— someone you saw everyday. The boy you complained to and cried to a few times. Now you can add another thing to that list; the boy who made you cum on camera for thousands.

Almost like Jeongin knew what you were thinking he tapped your ass with a little chuckle. His grip finding your waist again, “I didn’t know you were a camgirl.”

The Artist's Garden At Midnight | EP. 3 MEADOWSWEET MIDDAY

— contains adult content, minors do not interact 🔞 —

“Now you’re putting words in my mouth,” you hiss back.

He chuckles. Oh no, you already sense what he’s thinking. “I can also put something else in your mouth to finally shut you up, princess.”

[ abstract ]: Instead of playing the princess in an upcoming movie, it turns out you got scammed and are portraying her in an amusement resort to entertain tourists in Paris. On top of that, you are paired up with the man who you thought you would never see again. Hwang Hyunjin, an ambitious painter who broke your heart half a decade ago (your version of the story). However, you are not entirely innocent in this either when you were the one to rip his own into a thousand pieces first (his version).

[ general ]: hyunjin + fem reader, painter hyunjin, florist reader, kind of second chance au, almost lovers to enemies to lovers, coworkers au, story is set in paris, smut + angst + fluff, hyunjin and reader had a fling/situationship in their last year of highschool (they were legal) and story takes place 5 years later, please refer to series m.list for more info

[ warning ]: explicit sexual scene [ dom/sub dynamics, oral (m receiving), hair pulling, use of names such as pretty, princess, good girl and slut ], mention of cheating, mention of therapy and sleeping with strangers as some form of hurting oneself

[ words ]: 6.2K

[ note ]:As promised, here is another chapter this week! I hope you will like it. I'm insanely happy about all the great feedback so lmk again what you think about this part. I'd appreciate it a lot. Seriously, reading you guys thoughts on the story, characters etc. is even more entertaining than writing :)) Also, make sure to read The Experience Project and Screen Identity: Mismatched Passion, my other two series that are part of the same universe!! It's not necessary to read them to understand this plot but I would appreciate it! Lots of love, Cece 🩷

Your heart is beating out of your chest. You’re sure you didn’t even manage to fall asleep last night with everything that’s going on right now. Perhaps, you’ve underestimated what working over sixty hours a week would do to your body and mind.

However, it can’t be blamed solely on your current stress. After all, there’s another factor that has kept you awake yesterday and leaves you tired now.

Hwang Hyunjin.

Or, to be precise, how ethereal he looked when his face was between your thighs, granting you the best high you’ve ever reached.

He’s so different. More skilled. Even more attractive. And shamelessly annoying. You can’t quite grasp how a conversation can shift so many times within literal minutes. One minute, the two of you are provoking each other and hissing like snakes, the next thing you know is your stomach doing that thing where it feels as if thousand butterflies are visiting. Just from a single look of him.

It’s ridiculous. It’s pathetic. It’s exhausting.

As if you didn’t have enough on your plate, there’s another issue tingling at the back of your head that isn’t as pleasant to think about as your little encounter with Hyunjin in the trailer yesterday.

Your boss. After making you feel like an absolute fool and letting you know that the thing between you has never been anything serious—regarding he’s very much still together with his beautiful wife and not planning to leave her—Philippe actually had the audacity to send you a suggestive text.

You immediately took a screenshot of it and sent it to Ryujin—since she’s the only one who knows—while your best friend instantly told you to obviously not give in.

You didn’t plan on doing so. You might be naive from time to time but that’s even above your level of stupidity.

The only issue is—Philippe is still very much your boss. And you regret putting yourself in a position with such different power relations. 

Still, you grab your bag and rush to work, managing to get some tasks done until the clock strikes ten.

“Mademoiselle Y/L/N.”

Ah, we’re still playing all professional. 

You follow him to his office and take a seat, as you listen to the clicking noise that indicates he’s closing the door.

“Y/N. I’m sorry about the other night.”

One and a half weeks later. He can shove that apology up his ass.

“Pardon?”

Philippe sighs, “I didn’t plan on you meeting my soon-to-be-ex-wife like this.”

“Soon-to-be? Is she aware of that, Philippe?”

“Look… you’ve got it the wrong way. Marianne and I… this isn’t working anymore,” he stammers.

This is ridiculous. At least you don’t feel as stupid anymore when you hear your boss’s bad excuse of an explanation.

“Really? It didn’t seem this way. It was embarrassing, to say the least. As well as my new job offer. I’m not an actress, Philippe, I’m portraying Princess Camille as a cosplayer in a theme park. Did you know that?” you ask, shaking your head.

The chair you’re seated on is slightly moving from the tapping you do with your leg. It’s a habit you probably won’t ever get rid off.

“What? Cédric told me it was for the movie adaptation…”

You don’t know if he’s lying yet again or being serious and if you’re honest you don’t even care anymore.

“It’s… I don’t wanna know. Let’s just leave it like this, okay?”

You’re strong, Y/N. You have practised this enough times with Ryujin.

“W-What do you mean, sweetheart?”

Your stomach does the thing. The thing where you feel nauseous. Yikes. How did you ever fall for that guy?

“Don’t—please don’t call me that. It’s unprofessional. You’re my boss. That’s all,” you stand your ground.

This is going well. You’ve got this.

Philippe scoffs, leaning over his table, until he’s eye to eye with you. “But… what about us? What about our relationship, darling?”

You gulp. You feel a bit uncomfortable when he stares at you like this. But you know that you won’t give in.

So, you smirk, “It wasn’t anything serious, was it?”

He leans back again in his leather chair, crossing his arms in front of his chest. A glance that resembles daggers shot in your direction almost makes you melt, but you know that you’re better than this.

“Right,” is all he says, before he gets up and opens the door for you.

As if your day hasn’t already been a disaster, the next problem strikes your vision. Two very blonde problems that are currently talking to your colleague.

The two women that made fun of you on your first day of work, haven’t been the kindest to you ever since. Probably, because they see a threat in you when trying to make a move on Hyunjin. Gosh, if they only knew what happened in the trailer yesterday.

You’re trying not to get your hopes up high. You’re aware this was a one two-time-thing and there’s no way Hyunjin will drag this further. Fuck, you don’t even know how to look him in the eyes after this.

And then there was this kiss the two of you shared. Sure, it was only pretense but you’ve never felt such softness and comfort when kissing–

Okay, fucking stop it, Y/N. Do you even hear yourself?

It’s getting exhausting, how he’s running through your mind all the time. Doesn’t he ever get tired?

“Hyunjin, there’s no one else who could portray Prince Claude as perfectly as you,” one of them—you believe her name is Gisèle—flirts with him. She’s grazing over his arm with her fingers in an attempt to be close to him. God. You can’t look at this.

“Thank you, Gisèle,” Hyunjin replies, shooting a wink her way.

He can’t be for real, huh?

You turn around, storming to the trailer to grab your water bottle. But on your way—as clumsy as you are—you almost trip over your dress and fall to the ground.

Luckily, Cédric manages to hold you, before he says, “Be careful. Yesterday’s end of your shift was perfect with the kiss by the way. But I need you to stay focused, okay? This is business.”

Yeah. Business. Dressing up as a fictional character for families going to a movie theme park. You’re basically a business woman by now. You can feel it.

“Thanks. I will stay focused, Cédric, don’t worry.”

Once you’re back, Hyunjin has got another woman—your colleague Nathalie—attached to his free side. This is so stupid. You can’t look at him anymore.

What you’re not aware of is the fact that he’s not interested in them in the slightest. Hyunjin has never liked women who throw themselves at him, who disregard what personal space it. But he knows they’re not here for anything serious so he might as well use the situation to get your attention, right?

When he catches you steal another glimpse of the way his coworkers are getting closer to him, he gently pushes them away from him and walks towards you. Hyunjin uses long strides to approach you. Tsk. He really thinks he’s the main character, huh?

“Yeah? What is it?” you ask, your arms crossed in front of your chest. You’re totally fine. Everything is normal.

He chuckles, “You’re done staring? Or do you wanna join?”

Hyunjin tilts his head and wears a faux-pout on his ridiculously beautiful face. God. How much you hate those plump lips of his. And how they made you come yesterday. How they felt pressed against your own, when he aligned them for the sweetest kiss–

“I’m not staring,” you intervene. “Don’t think I’m in love with you just because of last evening.”

He’s so full of himself, you can’t believe it. 

“Oh, I didn’t think so. But it’s interesting to know that your mind immediately jumps to that idea, pretty,” he teases, clicking his tongue. Hyunjin takes a few more steps towards you and you forget the whole world around you.

You give him the same pretentious grin back, when you speak, “Well, I know, a wannabe-fuckboy like you can’t grasp that, but some of us are still romantics. Believe it or not.”

You’re not even lying. You’re actually a hopeless romantic. Which is the reason you’re not as experienced when it comes to sexual encounters like the man in front of you probably is. There’s a reason for it—you need a connection with a person in order to be close with them. They don’t necessarily have to be your partner, but you’d never be able to have a one-night-stand. You figured that out years ago.

“Oh, so you think I’m the worst, huh?” he asks back.

You’ve forgotten about your surroundings by now and it’s the same for Hyunjin. It feels as if he’s just here with you and no one else.

“Now you’re putting words in my mouth,” you hiss back.

He chuckles. Oh no, you already sense what he’s thinking. “I can also put something else in your mouth to finally shut you up, princess.”

You gulp. And let out an awkward chuckle. “I think… I think Cédric called me.”

You stumble back, almost tripping over your dress again as you desperately try to escape Hyunjin. Although you know it’s too late for that. He’s already under your skin, on his way to conquer your stupid heart.

“He didn’t. He’s talking to Gisèle and Nathalie,” Hyunjin says, “better be ready. Our shift starts in five.”

Hyunjin stands up, when he notices his best friend entering the little café. Damn, it’s been only two weeks since they’ve seen each other but it feels like years and yesterday at once.

Felix almost sprints towards him, greeting him with the tightest hug and the brightest smile that could outshine the sun—despite all the trouble he’s been through this past month—before the two of them sit back down on the sofa.

Hyunjin has already ordered two drinks for them and a variety of petit four.  “Man, I’m so glad to see you again,” his best friend says, after they’ve been chatting for a couple of minutes.

It’s great to have the most important person close to him in his life. Even if the reason that Felix spontaneously moved to Paris too isn’t a good one. But they will figure things out like they always do.

“I missed you so much, Lix,” Hyunjin says with a wide smile. “How are you?”

“Well, regarding the circumstances and all… it’s alright,” the younger one says, grabbing one of the sweet pastries.

“I’m so sorry he broke up,” Hyunjin continues. “I called you right away when you texted me but you didn’t pick up.”

He really thought Changbin and his best friend are end game, as people call it. They’ve always been so cute together, basically relationship goals, so it surprised him a lot to hear that Changbin ended things. He feels utmost pity for his best friend, but he will be here to go through heartbreak with him. Felix is not alone.

“Yeah. I kinda considered throwing my phone in the Han river. Until I realised I could also impulsively come to Paris and drop the device in the Seine,” Felix jokes.

Oh, God. His emotional distress must be very extreme if he uses sarcasm to that level to deal with it. Hyunjin reaches for his best friend’s hand and squeezes it.

“You’ve got the best timing,” the older one reassures him. “I just got an apartment for the two of us! It’s a bit outside of the centre, but you’ll like it. We can go there right after.”

He’s glad he found one with two bedrooms—no living room but a huge kitchen—in an outer arrondissement. They can start all over together again. Life will be good. He’s positive.

“That’s great. You know, I think I just need a fresh start and all,” Felix admit.

“I get you. That’s the reason I came here too,” his best friend says with a wink.

Felix allows a small smile to fill his face. “Has it worked so far? Have you been feeling better since changing continents?”

“Absolutely,” Hyunjin immediately says. Because it’s true. Since he went to Paris for the first time almost two years ago, he realised this is the place where he belongs to. It was inevitable.

However, his best friend knows him better than he knows himself. It’s always been like this. Felix can read whenever Hyunjin isn’t telling him everything. He’s not a liar, but still the older one tends to leave out details to his loved one.

“What are you hiding?” Felix asks, clicking his tongue.

Hyunjin looks at him with furrowed eyebrows. “Why should I be hiding something? You think I’m a liar?”

“No, that’s not what I said. But you’re my best friend. So, I know when something is going on in your head,” Felix reminds him.

Hyunjin’s tongue grazes over his upper teeth. “Alright, you caught me there.”

Felix sends him a reassuring expression, silently telling him that he's there for him too, whenever he needs it. “You wanna tell me?”

Hyunjin contemplates postponing that conversation to another time. But perhaps it’s better to get it off his chest sooner or later. In addition, Felix will figure it out anyway once the older one starts talking about his job.

“She’s here,” Hyunjin says.

“Who? Her?”

“Yes. Y/N. I knew she had moved here after graduating but I didn’t expect to run into her on my second night. At some random pub,” he explains.

Felix’s eyes widen, as his mouth falls agape. “Oh, dear. You’re life’s a movie, huh?”

“Yeah, feels like a thriller. Or satire. Whatever,” Hyunjin half-jokingly adds, shrugging his shoulder.

“So, you talked?”

“Yeah. Talking. A little more than that. Until her best friend who’s a bit too touchy with her for my liking called and cockblocked the whole thing,” Hyunjin confesses. 

His heart is beating out of his chest and he can feel his voice shaking. There’s no reason to be anxious around Felix. But perhaps he’s anxious towards himself, although he believes that doesn’t make any sense.

“Are they together?” Felix immediately jumps to that conclusion too.

“I asked her and she said no. But, bro, I don’t know. My whole head is a mess.” And my heart. “As if this isn’t enough trouble, she works at the theme park with me. Playing Princess Camille of all characters.”

Felix feels pain for his best friend. That’s a lot for someone who’s never gotten over the initial heartbreak that was caused by you.

“Hm, you showed me a picture of her. I remember. I see the similarities though,” he adds.

“You’re not helping, Lix,” Hyunjin scoffs.

“Sorry,” his best friend says. “Have you talked to your therapist?”

“I mailed her. But she hasn’t replied yet. However, I broke the agreement I had with her,” he admits then.

“Oh, no. Jinnie. You worked so hard…”

A year ago when Hyunjin started therapy in Seoul, he came to the conclusion that his lifestyle of attending parties and jumping from one stranger’s bed into the next one was some form of self harm, so his therapist suggested celibacy—at least regarding meaningless encounters—for some time. Soon, he realised that he’s doing better, putting much more emotions and work in his paintings instead and has been using it as a tool so far.

“I relapsed. I just—I couldn’t. She looked so beautiful that night. And… and we did it again after our boss made us stay locked inside the trailer where we have our break in,” Hyunjin continues.

“Your boss did– nevermind. How do you feel about it?”

“I’m confused. I feel like the dumb eighteen year old Hyunjin again that fell in love with his best friend’s girlfriend,” he admits.

“You told me they were still together when she slept with you yeah?”

If it was only sex. Hyunjin lost his virginity to you. Which will probably forever make him cling to you for whatever messed up mental issue.

“Seojun said so.”

“Dude… you remember all the shit he did to Minho’s little sister? After she told us?”

“Yeah. He’s sick in the head,” Hyunjin replies, feeling goosebumps all over his skin when he thinks back to ever being friends with this asshole.

“What if… what if he lied,” Felix suggests.

“I mean… it’s very likely. But—then she would have still made a move on her ex’s best friend at that time,” Hyunijn explains.

Felix tilts his head, reminiscing about other options. “Maybe for revenge?”

“I get it, Lix. I’m not saying I’m any better and wouldn’t do it. But why did she have to pull me into this mess?”

“You’re right. It’s still fucked up,” his best friend says.

“Yes. And not a good base for any type of relationship,” Hyunjin adds.

“Relationship?”

“Yeah…” he says with a small voice.

“So… it’s that serious?”

“It’s always been serious from my side. I don’t think I can be with this woman without loving her with all my heart.”

Wow. Felix is shocked. He’s not trying to downtalk his best friend in his head but this is new. The thing is, they both met in college. After you destroyed Hyunjin’s heart and he became the man he was throughout his university career. 

But deep down under all these layers of commitment issues, self harm and not knowing where to belong, there’s always been slumbering the real Hyunjin. Someone, who doesn’t go around breaking someone’s heart but lost the chance to get his own healed.

Perhaps, it’s not too late after all.

“God, that past year turned you into a total romantic,” Felix giggles. “I’d say I like it, but after going through a heartbreak myself–“

“Fuck, Lix. I’m so sorry. I didn’t even had in mind that–“

“It’s fine, Jinnie. Really. You can always talk to me.” The younger one reaches for his hand now, a simple gesture to reassure him. “So, how are you gonna handle this?”

Oh, he’s more supportive than Hyunjin expected. That’s good. He’ll see what his therapist said but he already knows what the answer is. They talked several times about a made up situation in which Hyunjin meets a person that’s good for him. Sure, no one ever thought he would meet you again. But his agreement about celibacy doesn’t count when you’re involved in his life again, right?

“I’ll see. I considered just going with the flow. The sexual tension between us is… I’ve never met someone like her. Or maybe it’s also because I haven’t had sex in a year,” he chuckles.

“What if she wants something casual?”

His heart breaks at the thought of it. And Hyunjin might already be too deep in this mess to stop himself.

“My heart tells me that it’s alright as well. But my head knows that it will destroy me in the long run.”

But maybe he is ready to make mistakes and deal with the consequences of. As long as he can have you. Finally.

Hyunjin is pretty much impressed by the new apartment that he’s going to share with his longtime best friend. It might be a little out of the city and the area could be a bit uncomfortable at night, but he gets a lot for the price they pay.

After checking out his surroundings, he realises that he's been here before. He needs some time to count two and two together until it clicks—you must be living somewhere here too. If he’s correct, it might even be the same street. At least that’s what he vaguely remembers from that night he drove you home after almost fucking you in a shady pub’s bathroom. He can’t recall the exact building that you live in though.

Hyunjin takes the elevator up the fifth floor, bags of groceries in his hands that he wants to bring home before Felix comes back from his first day of work as a model. He’s proud that his best friend had received the offer of continuing his job from back in Seoul here in Paris since his agency offers work here too.

He’s completely caught in his daydreams, thinking about how he will continue decorating the place further—he bought some plants and curtains from a flea market—when a man enters the elevator too. He doesn’t greet him but Hyunjin immediately knows who he is.

“What are you doing here? Visiting your favourite colleague, hm?”

Hyunjin scoffs, “What do you mean?”

“Y/N and I live here,” Seungmin explains.

He doesn’t like the guy. Hyunjin knows that a man and a woman can be friends, but that Seungmin guy seems super suspicious to him.

“Oh, I wasn’t aware. I just moved here, too.” Hyunjin’s eyes flicker to the screen with the numbers, watching for them to run faster. “So, you live on the same floor as her?”

Seungmin scratches the back of his head, “Same apartment, actually.”

Fucking hell. So you’re living with that guy? He really wants to trust you. He really does. But it’s not easy to believe that Seungmin and you don’t have anything going on.

“Ah, okay.” Hyunjin’s two syllables speak louder than a thousand words.

“You remember me, do you?”

“From Monday when you brought her lunch? Yeah, I do,” the older one adds.

“No, from high school. Kim Seungmin. We were in the same year,” your roommate says.

“Ah, right. The rich kid,” Hyunjin replies and he curses himself for just speaking without thinking. An issue he’s had his whole life.

“And you were the nerd. You look different today,” Seungmin adds.

“Yeah, I mean it’s been five years,” Hyunjin explains, being a bit confused. Although, when he thinks about it—Seungmin still looks the same except for the fact that he wears his hair shorter now, so you can see his forehead.

“That was a compliment, actually,” your best friend admits. He’s always had issues with social interactions.

“Oh, then—thank you.”

Awkward silence fills the room.

“So, you’re all new here?”

“Yup. Just moved here, like I said,” Hyunjin replies.

“Great. Well then, if you need anything, please hesitate to ask me,” Seungmin says, when the elevator opens and he walks towards his apartment.

“Please—what?”

“Have a day,” he adds.

“What’s with him?” Hyunjin whispers to himself before he’s in front of his own flat, searching for the keys.

Doubts are creeping up in Hyunjin’s stomach if there might be something going on between your roommate and you. Perhaps, it’s all been a lie what you told him about your relationship with Seungmin.

What your coworker doesn’t know is that your best friend is just protective and, maybe, a little socially awkward. Smalltalk isn’t his thing and when he thinks back to all the nights he held your hand in highschool when you were crying yourself to sleep from heartbreak, he doesn’t want it to happen yet so soon again.

And with none other than Hyunjin himself living in the same apartment building as you now. As well as considering your impulsive nature. Fuck, he’s just scared you’ll run right into misery again.

Sure, he could have been a bit friendlier. But then again, he’s not the biggest fan of your colleague. He hung out with Seojun back in the days which should be considered a red flag. However, even putting that aside—you showed your best friend your crush’s Instagram profile and told him about the escapades you heard of. So, Seungmin knows he’s no good for you. He’s just being a good friend, right?

It’s finally the end of the week. You’re glad you’ll have the weekend off this time. Philippe has been oddly quiet these past days but you don’t question it. You probably hurt his male ego—and his below average dick—when breaking up with this pathological liar.

This Friday will be a night to relax, watch some dumb shows with Seungmin while ordering takeout. What a great plan.

With some snacks in your tote bag and on your way back home, you enter the elevator of your apartment building, not paying much attention to the person that’s already inside when you say, “Hi—oh, you already pressed the top floor– Hyunjin? What are you doing here?”

Why the hell is he inside the elevator of your apartment building? Did he remember that you live–

“Hey. J-Just moved here,” Hyunjin explains, pressing his lips together. He looks confused. A but absent. He’s been acting strange since Tuesday and you wonder if it has anything to do with Gisèle and Nathalie. 

God. Stop being jealous, Y/N.

“Are you okay?” you ask him, when you see nervousness swirling around in his eyes. Those beautiful, big brown eyes. You could get lost in them.

“I’m fine,” is all he says, avoiding eye contact at all cost.

“You’re extraordinarily quiet today. Are you sure you don’t need anything?”

“I’m alright,” he says, shaking his head.

Weird. You wonder what’s going on or if you did or said anything that made him behave this way.

“I can get the package for you as well,” Seungmin offers.

You ordered something online and for some reason it got delivered the only hour you left the house this Saturday. It’s always like this. Why do those apps announce the package will be there within a certain timeframe and then they show up sooner or later than that?

Unfortunately, your roommate was working—whatever that means in the business world of the Kim’s—so he wasn’t at home either. This resulted in the package getting delivered to one of your neighbours instead. Now the little sheet you received reads “Hwang/Lee”.

You wonder who Hyunjin is living with. It would be the plot twist of the century if he’s actually got a partner at home and you wouldn’t be surprised. The family name Lee doesn’t ring a specific bell from highschool though, so you can’t quite connect the dots.

“No, it’s okay, Minnie. I know how much you hate stuff like that,” you tell him. Because you know your best friend.

“Which neighbour has it?” Seungmin gets up and walks towards you, as he reaches for the paper and reads the names out loud. Fuck. “Lee and Hwang? So, it’s at Hyunjin’s place—ah, that’s why you wanna pick that up.”

“Shut up. He has been behaving a bit weird. I just wanna check in,” you try to justify your motivation to visit the apartment of your new neighbour.

Seungmin grins. “Yeah, sure. Check in. Find out if he’s doing fine and if not so, you’ll help him?”

You know exactly what he’s referring at. And it makes your mouth fall agape. You’re not used to such accusations coming out of your best friend.

“What has gotten into you these days, Minnie? You seriously need to get laid,” you tease him.

“Okay. Enough. Go and pick up your package. I’m gonna make dinner in the meantime.”

You ring the doorbell, as your heart beats louder than that sound, threatening to burst out of your chest.

“Hey, Hwang,” you greet your colleague when he opens the door.

A little startled at first, he plays it cool, “Y/L/N. Are you here to greet your new neighbour?”

“Absolutely not,” you laugh. “Shouldn’t you be the one to introduce himself to the neighbourhood?”

“Don’t even think about it. I think I’m widely known around here,” he replies with a wink.

You scoff, “Is that a good thing?”

“I saw Seungmin the other day. How can you live with a guy like that?” he asks, shaking his head.

“None of your business,” you hiss back.

“Anyway. You’re here for your package, right?” Hyunjin brings you back to your focus.

“Hm. I am,” you say, showing him the delivery note.

“You wanna come in for a second?” he suddenly asks.

You raise one eyebrow. “Why?”

“God, what’s with all the questions,” Hyunjin sighs, throwing his head back. “I made fresh juice. You want some?”

“Oh, sure,” you immediately let out. “Orange or apple?”

“Both.” You follow him inside the house and take off your shoes. Hyunjin grabs a glass and fills it with both the juices before he hands it to you. “Here you are. You can sit down on the couch, I’ll grab your delivery.”

“Thanks,” you say, reaching for the beverage and dropping down on the sofa.

Hyunjin places down package, as he joins you, sitting next to you.

There’s a hint of this nervousness on his face again that you can’t quite interpret.

“I’ll get straight to it. Can I ask you something?” he suddenly starts.

You look at him confused, taking a sip from the juice. “Uhm, sure.”

“I– I don’t want this to sound weird. Although it probably will. But I’ve had an idea in mind… Cédric talked to me again the other day and said our dynamic still feels off and we should work on it further,” he continues.

“Alright,” you say, nodding. “What are you suggesting?”

“Do you remember what helped the other day? When those two teenage girls asked for a kiss between the two of us?” he begins.

“You want me to get trapped inside a trailer with you again? I mean, I’m not claustrophobic but if I’m honest, I don’t need that a second time.”

Oh, Y/N. You’re so oblivious.

“I suggest we both fuck. That’s the idea,” he says, clicking his tongue.

“You’re proposing what?”

“We both would profit from it. Call it an enemies with benefits situation or whatever,” Hyunjin explains.

He’s a mystery to you. You don’t get him sometimes.

“I don’t get you, Hwang. Two weeks ago you told me ‘no kissing, no touching, blabla’ and now you’re suggesting the opposite,” you state.

“I know. I’m sorry about the confusion. But I think it’ll help us two,” he adds.

“In which way?”

“Like I said, for work. How Cédric asked,” he repeats.

“That can’t be all, Hwang. We can also try to become friends,” you say, rolling your eyes.

“I’m pretty sure we both know best that you and I can’t be friends, hm?”

Something inside your heart breaks although you know what he means. And you agree. But you wished it wasn’t like this. A mistake you made half a decade ago will forever haunt you.

“What are other profits?”

“We both have sex, duh. Get some relief. Get rid of some stress,” Hyunjin continues.

You smirk. “Do you need to get laid, Hwang?”

“Wha– what do you mean?”

“I didn’t want to say it the other day, but the way you’ve been devouring me like a starving man the previous two times I’m sure it must have been sometime since you’ve got some, hm?”

How have you realised? Does he come off that pathetic?

“That’s so not true,” he tries to help himself.

“You’re the worst liar,” you chuckle.

“I can’t say that about you,” Hyunjin says, scooting closer so he’s eye to eye with you.

“Fuck you, Hwang.”

He clicks his tongue. “I’d rather fuck you, if I’m honest.”

Is this the dumbest idea you’ve heard in a while? Yes.

Might you still give in because you yourself crave intimacy with said man in front of you too? Maybe.

“Okay, under two conditions,” you propose.

“Yeah?”

“You stop talking badly about Seungmin,” you tell him.

Hyunjin rolls his eyes. “Fine.”

“And we’ll keep this a secret,” you add.

“Yeah, of course. No one can know about this,” he agrees.

“Not even our friends,” you emphasise.

“Exactly.”

The room suddenly grows silent, none of you ready to make the first move, until you grow some confidence, “So, are you gonna do something or…”

“I don’t know how to start this,” he admits.

“You were the one to suggest it, Hyunjin,” you scoff.

“I know. But now I’m getting shy,” he confesses and you can see a pink layer decorating his cheeks.

“Aww, is the old Hyunjin back?” You pout. “Let me do this, yeah? I can’t believe I’m saying this, but you deserve some pleasure too after last time.”

“I can’t believe how beautiful you looked when you came all over my tongue and fingers,” he compliments you. But this time there’s no smirk or grin on his face, he keeps a serious expression which just confuses your heart a little more.

You gulp. But continue. You get up from the couch and immediately get down on your knees between his legs. Hyunjin looks at you wide eyed, not having expected you to be that straightforward but he’s always liked this about you.

Your hands are placed on his muscular thighs, stroking the flesh through his sweatpants. Grey sweatpants. You’re already fucked. You graze them up and down, before you reach for the hem of the fabric and slowly pull it down.

Hyunjin catches his lower lip between his teeth, watching every move you make. Once his pants are completely down, you start placing sweet little kisses on his thighs, while your hand wanders north. You plan to not waste any time, cupping his erection through the material of his boxers, as you feel him grow inside them. He immediately goes hard and you’re not surprised.

After all, he basically confessed that he needs to get laid. But Hyunjin knows that it wouldn’t be like this with any other woman. His body doesn’t need to get some relief, his body needs you in specific.

You keep touching him through his underwear, until he reaches under your chin and tilts your head to make you look up at him.

“You sure you want this, baby?” he suddenly asks with big eyes.

You nod, “I'm sure, yes.”

“Then what are you waiting for, hm? Put that mouth to good use, pretty.”

You nod and grin, before you yank down his boxers too, watching his cock spring free. Your hand immediately wraps around his length, starting to stroke him. Hyunjin lets out a moan, throwing his head back.

Shit. You forgot how big he is. When you slept with Hyunjin for the first time, you had some trouble making him fit inside your cunt. And you already sense the same issue with your mouth.

You spit on the tip of his dick, smearing the liquid all over his shaft, as you keep stroking him. Slowly, you align your lips with his cock head, before you slide down, taking him as many centimetres as you manage, while the rest gets pleasured with your hand.

Your head starts bobbing up and down, finding a good rhythm that he seems to like. At least you figure so, when his hand lands on your hair, softly stroking it, as he encourages you, “Just like that, baby. Can’t believe you’re such a good slut for me.”

The name is new, but you can’t hide the fact that you like it. Caused by the immense dislike you have for the man whose dick is currently stuffing your mouth, you kind of enjoy the slightest hints of degrading, you can’t deny that.

Gagging and slurping sounds are echoing through the room, as Hyunjin pushes you further down on his cock, pulling your hair a little in the process. You can feel that he’s still careful, not wanting to hurt you, while his inner animal wants to have all of you.

“Fuck, princess. You look so pretty choking on my cock.”

He’s close. Already. And you don’t even question it. Your underwear is sticking to your pussy by now, but you don’t care about the neglect. This time, you’re getting under his skin and you like the control you’re having right now.

You keep pleasuring him with your mouth and hand, drooling all over his dick, before Hyunjin starts letting out a chain of whimpers. A little while later, his hot ropes of release are shooting to the back of your throat, painting it white, while he keeps moaning and groaning through his living room.

Once he’s coming down again, he slips his dick out of your mouth and watches your tongue clean the rest of him. Hyunjin pulls down his underwear and boxers again, as he stuffs his softening dick inside.

Fucking hell. Now he’s even more confused than before. But this picture of you on your knees will make him remember this special moment like a tattoo at the back of his mind.

He watches you get up and lean towards him, as you press a soft kiss on his cheek.

“So, can I get my package, Hwang?

Once you head back to your apartment and check the mailbox, you find a little letter with your name on it inside. You open the envelope and reach for the sheet of paper inside, before analysing it.

There’s a small drawing inside of a couple that’s sitting on a bench in a botanical garden. The plants have descriptions on them, all related to some symbolism of love. It’s truly beautiful even if it’s only made with different kinds of pencils, as far as you can tell.

When you flip the paper around, there’s a message written on it.

"I’d love to grow old with you just like our favourite flowers. But I know that this dream will never come true so I carry it inside my heart instead." Come to my vernissage on Friday — Samuel Sulfur

© leeknowsallyoursecrets 2024 — copying, stealing or translating my work is prohibited

---

I promise I will write soon 😭 Just a little more until this class is done 🫠 Lowkey my creativity has gone down as of late. Like it’s so hard to put words down. But it’s alright :D I’ll take it one day at a time

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ONE PROPOSITION.

Seungmin x reader. (s,f)

Synopsis: Not only you frown on love, you don't date nice guys and Seungmin is both a nice guy and don't want less than love. A proposition is offered to you to see if he can change your mind. (10,2k words)

Author's note: a fluffy smut for a change. Enjoy! :)

Love is patient, love is kind.

Pfft... more like love is slowly losing your mind.

Love makes it okay for people to dumb themselves down for someone else or do silly things in public and everyone would deem it romantic.

You don't do love anymore because it's nothing but a sack of vile and utter nonsense.

What you do is short-lived infatuation, physical attraction, one-night lovers then you're free to move on to the next one without any sort of attachment.

To put it simply, love gives you the stomachache. Love is just... yuck!

Also, it's easier that way, maybe you'll do love when you're old and bored or maybe...

"Let's go on a date!"

You don't expect this from the smartest student in class, Kim Seungmin.

You let out a dry laugh then pick up your bag from your chair, "sure, pick me up at 8?" You respond with a nonchalant shrug.

He doesn't seem to get the joke because he isn't laughing or responding to your words, he's just staring at you with his brown eyes.

Your laugh dies down instantly when you notice the serious face he puts on, "you're being serious?"

"I am," he shortly replies.

You scoff in a perplexed way then hoist your bag strap higher on your shoulder and start walking toward the exit, it's best to get out of this awkward scene.

When you think you're already losing him, you see him walking next to you and ask, "What do you think?"

"Think of what?"

"Going on a date with me?" He asks again.

You laugh again because it's the nicest response you can give to him, he's alright and he probably asked it for a social experiment or something.

"But why?"

He matches his pace to catch up with your half-jogging since you're going to be late for your part-time job at the bookstore.

"Because I like you," he simply answers like it's so obvious.

But you are so oblivious to it, you don't even know he's capable of having this kind of feeling. You always think of him as someone who knows nothing but being the smartest person in the room. You laugh again because you don't know how to properly respond to someone who admits that he likes you out of a blue.

"Seungmin, I can't play along. I'm going to be late for work," you tell him while keeps walking in the direction of the bus stop near campus.

"I can drive you there," he offers, taking the car keys out of his jacket and jiggling them in front of you.

You calculate it in your head, even after you make it to the bus stop, you still have to wait for the bus then there's probably traffic, taking his offer can save you from being late to work.

The only information you have on him is so little that you have no idea he's been driving his car to campus every day. It's neat in there, unlike any other guy's car you've been in that's littered with trash or their stuff. His car smells nice and he drives steadily with one hand on the steering wheel.

"You haven't done that assignment for Professor Park's class, don't you?" He suddenly asks.

Your eyes widen in shock because no one knows except that he was there when you were being scolded by Professor Park in his office.

"How did you know?"

It takes him a few seconds to finally give you an answer, "we met outside his office but I guess you were too upset to notice."

You weren't just upset, you cursed at Professor Park right after closing the door of his office then kicked the potted plant nearby, sending the soil scattered on the floor. You were furious but Seungmin was just being nice by saying you were just 'too upset'.

"I don't see why you still like me after seeing that," you say with an awkward laugh.

"I just do," he says ever so casually like he just didn't admit to having a feeling for you.

Aren't you glad you're not like any other girl? Imagine hearing that and your heart starts to flutter.

"That's why I ask you on a date," he says again.

You take a moment to look at him, observing him and trying to see if he has any ulterior motives. Who knows? It's usually the quiet ones that are unpredictable.

He turns his head at you and stops you from scanning him further, "Let's go on a date!"

You have no problem with him, he's alright. Kim Seungmin is nice and smart, but that's also the problem, you don't date nice guys.

"No," you flatly reject him.

He doesn't seem to mind being rejected, he rather seems like he already expected this answer from you.

"May I know why?" He calmly asks.

And you like how curious he sounded, he probably thinks this whole thing is a mathematical problem that he can't solve and will keep on trying until he does.

"I don't date guys like you," you answer.

"Guys like me?"

"Nice guys," you give him a clearer answer.

"Ah!" He exclaims and calmly makes a turn to the parking lot of the bookstore you're working in.

You take it that he gave up already on his quest to date you but as you unbuckle the safety belt, he stops you from getting out of the car.

"I have a proposition for you," he says.

And you never heard any man saying that to you, a proposition? What does he think it is? A business deal?

"I'll help you work on your assignment for Professor Park," he offers.

You know there's something to that, "but…?"

He smiles at your word and it's the first time that you've ever seen on him, it surprised you that he has another expression apart from the serious and focused ones you always see on him

"But once the assignment is approved, I get to take you on a date," he finishes.

It's confusing already with him suddenly confessing that he fancies you, him of all people. Why would the smartest guy on campus like the most average student who only likes to fool around with guys?

But you must admit that he makes a good proposition, it's very tempting.

"Just a date? One date?" You ask.

He nods, "one date."

One date is not harmful, right? A nice guy like him is most likely to take you out on a dinner and perhaps a walk in the park after, a kiss or two at the end of the night. You can do that without having to involve any feelings whatsoever.

There's this tugging feeling though, maybe it's coming from your experiences with bad guys that always make you suspicious about everything they do.

Also, what if Seungmin is just playing with you?

"Can I answer this later? I'm late for work," you say.

"What time do you clock out?" He asks.

You act nonchalantly to not give him the impression that you will take his proposition that easily, "8 but I have to do some stuff beforehand. Maybe close to 9, I don't know."

He nods but not saying anything to you.

"Thanks for the ride, bye!" You abruptly end the conversation and get out of his car.

You forgot all about it when you have so many tasks waiting for you, there are just too many things to do that half shift of work ended so fast and you take one last lap around the bookstore to return the straying books to their shelves.

You clock out half an hour after eight and push through the back door, you just need to go to the bus stop and a fifteen-minute bus ride later, you'll be back at your small apartment and sleep and...

You hear a car honking at you from across the parking lot, you squint to see the car with the headlights shine right at you.

The car drives and stops right next to you, it's Seungmin.

"Come on, I'll drive you home," he says from his rolled-down window.

You lean down just enough to see him inside and lean closer to him, "Why are you still here?" You ask with pure shock.

"I'm waiting for your answer," he answers in the same deadpan manner.

So, Seungmin is serious about his proposition.

-

You work on the assignment together after you get off work and Seungmin would already there, waiting in his car for you.

He doesn't mind spending hours in your shoebox of an apartment, squeezing yourselves into the worn-out couch while he patiently guides you as you work on your laptop. He never overstayed and leaves before midnight, despite none of you having a curfew and being of age to do anything.

When you're not working, you do the assignment at a cafe close to your apartment building.

"Do you always do that?"

"Huh?" You turn your head at him.

"Touching your nose," he points at your hand touching one of your ears.

You didn't even know you were scratching your nose until he pointed it out and you have to consciously put your hand down, "it's a habit, I guess."

He sheepishly smiles at you before looking down at the book he's reading, "that's cute."

And you can say the same about him.

Seungmin likes to wait by his car for your last class to end and his face would light up when he sees you.

"How are you?" He would ask, it's a simple question but you like his smile more when he asks that, a smile that somehow resembles a puppy's.

One night, when you had to work overtime at work, he came into the bookstore and brought you food because he knew you'll be skipping dinner.

Seungmin is nice and he's smart, he's great but love is just... yuck.

-

You are back on your worn-out couch to work on the assignment for the last time.

Seungmin is intently checking your assignment while you quietly do the same to him. These past few days you have spent with him, make you notice things you haven't seen in him before. He used to wear his hair down, but tonight, he pushes his hair back which makes him look more attractive.

And when he's focusing hard like this, his stare is fierce and his jaws are clenched, he looks even more attractive because he's so unaware of it.

He wears a fitted shirt which only accentuates his slim figure and square shoulders.

"Do you play sports?" You blurt out because you're never the type to hold back when you're curious about something and most men like being asked about their physique.

"Baseball," he shorty replies without straying his eyes from the laptop screen.

"Let me guess, pitcher?"

He nods.

That explains the broad shoulders and your eyes lower to see his hands holding the laptops, he has nice hands and long fingers with evident veins on the back of his hands.

It's the first time you realize you have always been sitting in this proximity with him on your worn-out couch in your small apartment.

Tonight, the proximity feels exceptionally palpable and you start to notice the nice smell of his perfume.

Seungmin shifts on his seat to put the laptop down on the table.

"It's good," he says then takes a sip of his canned soda.

"Yeah?" You ask but your eyes watching his Adam's apple bob in his neck as he swallows his drink.

He nods.

"Do you think Professor Park will approve?" You ask but your eyes are looking at nowhere but his lips.

"Yes," he confidently says.

You swallow air and lean in close, a hand holds him by the shoulder as you press a kiss on his lips.

The kiss is fizzy and sweet like the orange soda that he just drank. His lips are soft and warm but you notice that he stiffens against your lips.

You hurriedly let go of the kiss, poor guy isn't ready when you hastily decided to kiss him.

"I'm sorry," you say. As much as you hate saying sorry for everything you do that you're not exactly sorry for, the words have to be said.

He stays quiet for a moment then lifts his hand to reach for your hair, putting it all away and putting it behind your ear.

"Can I kiss you back?" He asks.

You eagerly nod.

He slowly brings his face close to you and your eyes are closing out of reflex, you feel his soft kiss on your cheek. When you think he will stop there, he drags his lips to kiss you on each eyelid and your breath quickens as he continues sliding his lips down your cheek to your lips.

There, he kisses you again.

With his tongue, he cleverly parted your mouth open to deepen the kiss and you gasp as you let him taste you more.

Sensing that he wants this as much as you do, you get on his lap and he immediately sits back on the couch.

He curves his hand under your arm and splayed his hand on your back.

There's no way that Seungmin has never dated before, the way he twirls his tongue and brushes his lips over yours, it's impossible if he's this good at kissing and never dated anyone before.

And he knows his hand placement, he’s touching you in the places that usually make you uncomfortable but still, you like how he holds you in place and keeps you safe.

He's officially good at kissing and you wonder if he's good at other things too.

Keeping his mouth busy, your fingers working open the buttons of his shirt one by one but you ditch the plan altogether and decide to glide your hand down his front until you meet the waistband of his jeans.

He catches your hand before you can proceed and breaks the kiss, "not now," he mutters.

"Why not?" You ask and lean in to kiss him again.

He stops you there and smiles, "I haven't taken you on a date yet."

"Well, we can skip the date and just do it, you know?" You've never been shameless about being upfront about it. You know what they want and you know you have the same interest so what's the point of beating around the bush?

"That's not a part of the proposition," he says and he glances at the clock on your laptop screen, "and it's almost midnight, I have to go."

You scoff and reluctantly get off his lap, "this is why I don't date nice guys," you say with a heavy sigh.

Seungmin gathers his things and put everything back into his bag, he cracks a smile seeing your dissatisfied expression, "don't worry about the assignment, I'm sure it'll be approved," he says.

"Okay," you say with a shrug, feeling a tad bitter for being rejected by him.

He lowly chuckles seeing you pouting at the far end of the couch, "I'm going. See you at campus!" He says, waving his hand at you by the doorway before leaving.

Seungmin is nice and smart, he's great, he's a good kisser and has nice square shoulders but love is just... yuck.

-

You let out a long sigh of relief once you got out of Professor Park's office, your assignment is approved and you feel like the thing that's been weighing down your chest disappeared into thin air.

Seungmin waits by his car and you come up to him to deliver the good news.

"He approved!" You say with a giddy smile.

"Told you, you don't have to worry so much," he says with such coy.

"Thank you," you sincerely say to him with a smile.

He smiles back and unlocks the car, "Get in! I'll drive you to work!"

Okay, you have to give him that, he looks so cool looking calm and confident like that.

"So, you've done your part in the proposition... when can I do mine?" You ask, trying to make it sound casual but it's unusual for you to get nervous talking about it to him.

He gets quiet and you can't help but think what if he has a second thought about the proposition after spending these past few days with you?

"I'll call you to tell you when," he says.

And his answer only makes you even more nervous because what if he really is just playing a social experiment on you? What if he doesn't like you anymore? What if, what if, what if.

"You're going to be late!" He says with a hand gently squeezing your forearm.

You didn't realize that you have arrived at the parking lot of the bookstore, "Yeah," you stutter and quickly gather your bag.

You push the car door open but not getting out yet, "you don't have to pick me up after work," you tell him.

"Yes, I was about to tell you I can't pick you up. I have something to do tonight," he adds.

"Thanks for the ride!" You say before getting out of the car.

It's kind of boring when you get back to your apartment and have nothing to do when it's usually you and Seungmin working on an assignment together. It's clear that you don't miss the assignment, you miss having Seungmin around and listening to his weird ideas out of his smart mouth.

But you have to be the nice girl and wait for the nice guy to call for the date.

How long would it take though?

You start to think that you're getting karma from making all those men wait for your call and you've been dreading a phone call for a week now.

You still meet him on campus but it looks like he's busy with something or he's just straight up wanting to give you hell.

Kim Seungmin is not a nice guy after all.

If this how's he is going to do it then why don't you shift your attention elsewhere but to the cute guy you met in the library.

You don't know why you like cute guys nowadays, but he has dimples on his cheeks so you guess that's why.

"I'm in my second year," he says.

"Oh?" So that means he's younger than you and not that you have problems with age it's just taken you by surprise, also, that explains why he's so cute.

Your phone rings in the middle of the conversation, you ignore it by shoving it inside your bag but it keeps on ringing.

"I'm sorry but I have to take this," you say to your cute date with an apologetic smile.

"Sure yeah," he replies.

You pick it up without seeing the contact name, "hello?"

"Hey, it's me," he says from the other end of the line.

And you recognize the voice, it's Seungmin.

"Yes?" You try to mimic his nonchalant way of talking.

"Just letting you know that the date is tonight," he says.

"Tonight?" You ask in surprise and almost make your date choke on his coffee.

"Yeah," he confirms.

You clear your voice and clear your throat before speaking, "but that's so sudden," you meekly say.

"So... you can't go?" He asks.

Isn't this what you've been waiting for? Doing your part on the proposition?

"No, let's do it tonight," you calmly answer.

"Okay then, I'll pick you up at 7," he says and hangs up.

You put your phone away and look at it, can't believe that he ends the phone call like that after making you wait for a whole week.

Then you see that it's fifteen past four in the afternoon which means you only have less than 3 hours to get ready. You get up from your chair and take your bag.

"Where are you going?"

For a second, you are forgetting your cute date and shoot him a smile, "I have to go somewhere," you say.

But he just looks at you wide-eyed and confused.

Maybe it's time that you stop fooling around and this cute guy deserves someone better than you. You look at him and smile, "you're really cute and nice, I had a fun time but I really have to go," you admit with a grimace.

No matter how much you hate apologizing but you do owe him an apology for abruptly leaving him on a date.

"I'm sorry," you sincerely say.

"That's okay," he responds with a dimpled smile.

The next thing that gets in the way is the outfits, you have zero ideas about where Seungmin may take you tonight. What would a nice guy do on a date? Where would he take you?

Probably candlelight dinner somewhere romantic, that's pretty much the standard of a nice guy. You decide on a simple black dress because it's always the safest choice. It's not too short, it's appropriate, and it's giving a nice girl look with all of your hair down.

A few spritzes of perfume and off you go.

Seungmin's car is already waiting not far from the entrance of your apartment building, you walk there and get inside without waiting for him to let you in first.

"Have you been waiting long?" You ask, hurriedly looking for the seatbelt to put on.

He looks at you rather wide-eyed, a bit confused.

It makes you suddenly feel so insecure about yourself, "Is there something wrong?"

He gets quiet for a few seconds before shaking his head, "You look nice!" He says.

That reminds you to look at his outfits and he wears something casual, a black shirt with blue jeans and a dark jacket.

Great, you're overdressed!

"Thanks," you meekly say.

You clear your throat while Seungmin turns the key in the ignition, "where are we going?" You ask and try to sound coy about it.

"We're going to see your favorite band!" He replies.

Turns out, Seungmin did his research very thoroughly and found out that your favorite band is busking at the park tonight.

They're still setting up band equipment when you arrived, you choose to sit on the steps facing the stage but you're struggling to cover your legs since you're wearing a dress.

Seungmin is considerate as he always does. He takes off his jacket and put it on your lap, "Here!"

"Chivalry is not dead after all!" You beam and fix his jacket to cover your legs.

The steps start to fill with more people as the time for the show is getting nearer, "How do you know my favorite band?"

Seungmin was rolling the sleeves of his shirt when you ask, "I see your records collection at your apartment," he simply answers like it doesn't take a math formula to know it.

"But I have a lot!" You point out.

"But I see that you have a lot of records of them," he replies.

"But that could also mean I only like the album covers," you hypothetically remark.

He jerks his head with a scrunched face, "that's impossible! You own one of their rare records!"

That caught you off guard, you didn't think that he would do such detailed research to your liking, you're low-key impressed by him.

"You know there's a much simpler way to know everything that I like," you tell him.

"Yeah?"

You nod and look at him, "you can ask the person yourself," you say with a sly smile.

He sheepishly smiles and places his hand on his knee, "Can I ask you something then?"

"Sure!”

"Do you like me now?"

He caught you off guard again but this time you burst out laughing as a reaction, "We're hardly an hour into our date here."

"So?" He asks with a shrug.

It's that hint of nonchalant attitude that makes him stand out from the other guys you met and mingled with, possibly the most interesting nice guy you've ever met and you're aware of how they contradict each other.

"Ask me again at the end of the date," you say with a sneaky smile.

At the end of the show, Seungmin helps you get up from the steps and you put his jacket on since the night is getting cool.

"Where are we going now?" You always hated being so nosy but Seungmin has been keeping you on your toes by not telling you what his plans for the date are. So far, all of your guesses are missed.

"I thought you were hungry," he says.

"I am!"

He holds your hand and leads you to the other side of the park, "I'm hungry too so I'm thinking we should get somewhere to eat."

You start guessing in your head again, maybe this once your guess will land on the mark, that he would take you somewhere romantic like you expected in your head.

He takes you on a stroll and not hesitates to keep holding your hand wherever you go, somehow you don't feel uncomfortable at all.

There are so many couples taking a stroll in the park so you're grateful that you're not alone among all of these lovey-dovey couples.

"The exit out of the park is this way," you tell him as he keeps going straight.

"There are a lot of food trucks by the river," he says while keeps pulling you with him.

You snort behind him since the park is crowded with people taking pictures of the cherry blossom in bloom.

He looks over his shoulder and sees you laughing, "What's so funny?"

"Nothing," you snort again, once again failing on your guess.

Seungmin is truly something.

"What do you want?" He asks as you stop at a food truck to order food.

"I want the cheeseburger but I also kind of want the bacon one," you answer, torn between the two.

"Then we'll order both," he concludes and orders it.

Sitting on the empty bench facing the river with your food in the space between you and him, you can't lie that you're getting hungry just from the sight of it.

"You want to try mine?" He offers.

You don't take the burger from him but take a bite out of it while he holds it, munching it with a grin on your face.

He lets out another smile, one that you like to see on him, the puppy one.

He doesn't wait to take a bite right after you and a dollop of ketchup gets on the corner of his mouth.

"You did that on purpose, don't you?" You say with squinted eyes.

"Huh? What?"

You take a napkin and wipe it clean for him, "there!" You hand the napkin to him after and continue eating your food.

"Did you do that on purpose too?" He suddenly asks.

You look up at him, "what?" You trace your mouth if you got anything on your mouth.

"You do this," he points out at how you always scratch your nose.

"I did?" You ask with eyes widened.

He nods.

Before you can explain, you unconsciously scratch your nose and stop when you're aware of what are you doing.

"I told you it's a habit," you persist and fight the urge to do it again.

"And I told you that it's cute," he says then shoves a few fries into his mouth.

You make another trip to the selections of food trucks and bought ice cream as dessert while taking a stroll back to the parking lot. The night is so warm the ice cream melts in your hand.

You throw the rest of the cone into the garbage bin before getting into the car, Seungmin pulls open the glove box in front of you and takes out a pack of wet wipes.

He pulls two at once and helps you clean your hands with them, he meticulously wipes the spaces between your fingers too. You smile looking at how he cares that much about your hygiene.

"I feel like a surgeon about to go into the operation room," you joke.

But he is unfazed by all of your fun takes on his treatments on you, "I guess we're going home?" he says.

You check the time on your phone screen, "but it's barely 10 pm," you say.

"Then... do you want to go somewhere else?" He asks.

You laugh because once you gave up guessing what he's going to do next, he runs out of plans for the date.

"Are you saying this is the end of the date?" You ask with disbelief.

He innocently nods.

You sit back and keep laughing, he did everything to get on a date with you but the date itself is... you wouldn't say lame, he’s just didn't prepare it well.

"Let's just go somewhere," you say before your laughs start to annoy him.

"Your place?"

"No!" You refuse rather too quickly.

If you went to your place then he would get to use the 'it's midnight time to go home' excuse on you.

"Let's go to your place," you say without looking at him, afraid that he would read your intentions.

He looks at you for a few seconds and you bravely look back at him, using all the force you have in you to remain calm.

"Okay!" He agrees then starts the car engine.

Seungmin lives quite far from the university while you live not very far, it's a mystery how he manages to always get there before you. Or it could be because you're just lazy.

His apartment building has an elevator that works and he lives on the eighth floor, can only imagine what kind of view he gets from his apartment.

"Come in!" He says as he pushes the apartment door open to let you in.

He doesn't have that much furniture in his place, everything is neatly placed and well organized. The door to his bedroom is slightly ajar, you can only take a little peek at what it looks like but you see his bed is made.

"Please, sit down!" He gestures to the long sofa that is unlike the worn-out couch you have at your place.

You sit in the middle and he hands you a blanket from the armrest of the sofa.

"Want to drink something?" He asks.

"Yes, please?"

"Water, juice or soda?"

"I'd like a glass of wine actually," you say in an attempt to tease him.

He turns around and heads to the kitchen, opening the cabinet to pull out a bottle of wine which surprises you that he really has one.

"I only have red wine, is that alright?"

"More than alright!" You reply with a smile.

You wait for him while taking off his jacket, gently placing it on the empty stool next to the sofa then unfolding the blanket to cover your legs with it.

Seungmin returns with the bottle of wine in one hand and two glasses in the other, you take them from him so he can open the bottle.

He carefully pours wine into both glasses and takes one from your hand, clinking your glass together to finally take a sip.

"Can I ask you the question again now?" he asks, putting his wine glass down on the table.

You finish your glass to make him wait for your answer, "but it's not the end of the date yet," you disagree with him.

You put down your glass and turn to face him on the sofa, "and you have to pass the basic interview first!"

"The basic interview?"

You shush him and think of a question to ask him, "first question: since when do you like me?"

He turns his head at you with an intrigued expression on his face, "ever since we took the same class together," he answers.

You trace back to the time you first met him in economy class and it was back to almost a year ago, you didn't know he's been liking you ever since.

"Second question: why do you like me?"

He takes his time to answer and turns at you to deliver it, "because you are smart but I'm obviously smarter," he begins.

"I'll take that as a compliment," you let out a snide comment at him.

"You're very honest in an almost rude way," he adds.

"I'll... also take that as a compliment," you comment.

"I said almost," he reminds you.

You roll your eyes at him in response.

"And you're very genuine, there's nothing fake about you," he concludes.

You raise an eyebrow at him, "maybe I do but you just don't know," you poke fun at him.

"I would have seen it if you had any," he says.

You chuckle at how confident he is of himself and move on to the next question, "What do you like about me then?"

"Everything!"

You groan at the typical answer, "how cliché!"

"You want me to name a specific part of you that I like?"

You nod.

"But I don't have any specific part of you that I like, I like every part of you that makes you, you," he explains and you hate to admit it but he did sound so cool when he said it.

Certainly not an answer you had in mind that you don't know how to properly react to that.

"I like you as a whole," he says with his doe eyes staring right at you.

You're not supposed to feel this way, right? But you feel the blood rushing to your cheeks as they start heating. You start to laugh because it's the only proper way you know to react to his words.

"Are you blushing?" He points out.

"No!" You deny his question rather too quickly again.

He chuckles at you and takes the bottle of wine to refill your glass.

"You know you don't have to say all that," you tell him.

"But you're asking," he coyly replies.

"I mean," you take the bottle of wine from him and put it away, taking his hand then taking the front of his shirt, "Just kiss me already!"

You pull him by the shirt you crumple in your hand and bring his face close to you, locking your lips with his, closer and closer until the gap is closing.

This is long overdue, you have zero patience left and Seungmin is a damn good kisser, you can't stop now, you're not letting it go.

You push him back against the sofa then gets on his lap, straddling him with your hands caging him in between, smirking as you're about to sink your mouth into his again.

Seungmin unexpectedly returns the kisses with such enthusiasm with his hands begin to touch you, tracing the curve of your body clothed in skin tight dress.

You keep kissing him, forcing his head to tilt upward, earning you access to deepen the kiss.

He lets out little whimpers every time you tugged his lips between your teeth like a little puppy.

He's probably running out of breath that he gently pushes you away, making a space between your faces yet he stays with his head resting back on the sofa.

His eyes easily find yours and stare at them, then put all of your hair away to take a better look at you.

His hands then trace the frame of your face, eyes, nose, and lips. He touches them so tenderly as if he’s touching flower petals.

It's the way his eyes light up when he looks into your eyes again that gets you, he brushes your hair to the side and softly smiles, then mutters, "you're really pretty."

You don't know how he did that but you believe that he's being genuine, Seungmin has been nothing but honest about what he says and does.

Then you feel something in your stomach, a feeling that was once familiar and only made you sick before. Your heart is beating faster and you start to think he could hear it so you kiss him again.

Seungmin slowly slumps down on his seat and the next thing you know both of your bodies are tangled on the sofa with his body weighing on top of you.

In the heat of the moment, he suddenly breaks the kiss and props his hand next to you.

"Why? What's wrong?" You ask because of how abruptly he stopped kissing you.

"It's getting late," he says.

You glance at the clock on the wall and the time shows it's 10 past midnight, you glare at him in disbelief, "don't tell me that you're going to send me home?" You wildly guess because it seems like the nice guy in him kicks in.

He lowly chuckles at you, "I'm saying we should take it to the bedroom," he says with a sly smile.

That means the nice guy in him is off for the night and that's exactly what you want, you want him bad.

He gets up first and holds out his hand at you which you eagerly take, walking behind him as he leads you to his room.

He turns around once you step into the room and says, "I have to check if you have something on you."

You tip your head to the side in confusion, "Huh?"

He lets go of you to put his hands on your shoulders, "do you carry anything dangerous with you?" He asks, patting the side of your body as if you're going through a security check.

You softly chuckle at him and hum while thinking of an answer, "not that I know of," you cheekily answer.

His hands stop at your waist then he slowly pushes you to the wall, "I have to do a full body check then," he utters to you with his body pins against yours.

He's so hot gleeful and sly like this, you're trapped in his gaze as he looks down on you and put your hands up, pins them above your head.

He presses his forehead on yours to softly kiss the tip of your nose and oh... these butterflies used to make you sick.

He drops your hands onto his shoulders and holds you close, burying his mouth in your neck, drinking in your scent.

Catching him off guard, you turn him around and have him pinned against the wall with your body, "what about you?" You ask with your finger hooks on the opening of his shirt.

"Do you have anything dangerous on you, sir?" You ask again with a loopy grin.

He slumps down just enough to be on the same eye level as you and throws his hands up, surrendering himself to you.

Your hands begin to pat around his body, feeling the firmness of his body against his shirt to eventually meet his stiff member inside its confine.

"Now, that's dangerous!" You lowly murmur to his ear.

Without warning, he wraps his hands around you to unzip your dress.

He doesn't wait to part it open and take it off you, until the piece of clothing pooling around your ankle. He keeps taking steps forward forcing you to walk backward until the back of your legs hit the bed frame.

Slowly, you sit on the edge of the bed and hold his hands before laying down, pulling him with you, sending him toppled on top of you.

With the room staying dimly lit with the only source of light coming from the bedside lamp, Seungmin's jaws appear firmer, prominent and he's just so fucking attractive.

There's no need to confirm how wet you are down there just from having his body on you.

His long fingers trace your jaw before lowering his mouth on you again, so slowly as if he's kissing something so fragile.

With the proximity, your hands work to open his shirt while he keeps your mouth busy with slow, deep kisses.

You impatiently rip his shirt open the second you succeed in opening the last button and Seungmin helps by taking it off of him, then throws it aside. You won't waste another second touching his body with your hands. He's not muscular but his body is firm and lean, and his skin is warm like the morning sun.

The hunger for him grows bigger as your hands go lower to unbutton his jeans open and Seungmin abruptly stops kissing you.

Your mouth is agape, panting and your eyes snap open to find his staring into you. You slightly got panicked thinking that you must've done something he's uncomfortable with, "Wha—"

He buries his head in your neck again even before you can finish your question, kissing you there, tasting your skin with his tongue. You gasp when he softly bites your ear shell and he drags his mouth down your chest.

A shiver goes down your spine as he gently kisses your sternum and leaves a wet mark on the skin, funny that it feels like he just sets your body on fire.

He continues his trail of kisses and not stopping even though his mouth is getting closer to where you wanted him the most.

You mewl the moment his mouth lands on your clothed core, his breath feels heavy and hot between your legs.

He looks at you as his hands start pulling your underwear down your legs and off of you, kissing your inner thighs after.

With his big hands rubbing up and down your thighs, his mouth once again closing into your heating core, he hasn't touched it but you feel the tingle already.

It feels soft and warm that you let out a delightful sigh, his mouth on your delicate flesh and you're taking in all these delights with your eyes closed.

Everything he does with his mouth is so subtle and smooth yet he presses on the right spots rather intensely.

You have nothing to say but let him take you higher and drown you in pleasure.

Then he suddenly stops and lifts his head to look at you, "you're so quiet," he says.

You look down at him, at his head hanging between your legs with disheveled hair.

"You don't like it? Want me to stop?" He asks again.

You look him in the eyes and ask, "Did I tell you to stop?"

You prop an elbow and your other hand reaches for his head, "do you hear me telling you to stop?"

He stays still for a few seconds then places his mouth on you to continue the deed.

"That's what I'm saying," you say as he twirls his tongue on your clit ever so slowly like licking an ice cream and it slowly melts under his tongue.

Your hand tangles in his hair and tug at it every time the pleasure feels too intense, another way to tell him that your silence doesn't mean that you're not enjoying it. It's the opposite, it's too good that you can't find anything to say but enjoy every second of it.

Your moans grow louder as your breath quickens, and the knot inside you comes to the point that you can't hold it in anymore.

Seungmin seems to sense that you're coming close to your high and continues what brings you the most pleasure using his mouth.

Your back is arching as you seek more even though you're on the verge of exploding and when you finally do, you try so hard not to clamp Seungmin's head between your legs.

You pull him by the shoulder to hover above you, "A nice guy who knows how to eat me out, huh?"

With your hand on his neck, you pull him close to kiss him.

"I think that's my new ideal type," you add with your lips grazing his as you speak.

He gets flustered by your words then kisses you again while you use the opportunity to taste yourself on him.

And maybe he senses how needy you are for him that he puts a space between your bodies, slowly pulling away from the kiss.

"Just a second," he says and crawls over to the side, taking something out from a drawer.

You take the time to take off your bra and put it away, sitting on the bed while waiting for Seungmin.

"I can help you with that," you say with a sly grin since he takes quite a long time to put on a condom.

"Are you that impatient?" He asks without looking at you.

You laugh at his remark and find him crawling back at you, crashing his body on top of yours, kissing you ferociously that when he finally lets go, you gasp for air.

He then shifts his focus to enter you, wetting the tip with your essence to slowly push it in.

You spread your legs wider the deeper he goes and draw his body closer, he feels so good inside that you feel like going to climax one more time despite you just had it a few minutes ago.

In the midst of it, he looks at you for any signs of discomfort on you.

"I can take you well," you assure him with a grin.

He lowly chuckles and kisses you again, probably to shut you up from making another playful remark at him.

Seungmin thrusts deep and slow, everything about it so sensual, his hair that falls around his face and the way his jaws clench and unclench.

You usually never cared much about who wants to please or get pleased, tonight exceptionally, you want to do the former. Holding him by the shoulders, you turn him over and have him under you, you take a moment just to look at him, at how gorgeous he looks underneath you.

You place your hands on his chest and start slowly rolling your hips, letting him feel how good it feels being inside you.

Feeling mischievous, you intentionally clench around him and watch how his face contorted in pleasure.

"You like that?" You ask him.

He sighs before answering you, "I'll let you know later," he pokes fun.

You glare and clench around him again, your teeth faintly biting your lower lip.

He groans with his hands gripping each side of your waist, overwhelmed by the pleasure.

Seungmin doesn't want to play along anymore, so he gets up and wraps his hands around you, holding you still without stopping you from moving on top of him.

You manage to break your hands away from his confine and put them around his neck, bringing your mouth close to his ear you say, "cum for me like a nice guy you are," you say with a giggle.

He looks up at you with eyes wide and dark with lust, then without warning, he lowers you down to the space between his legs on the bed.

He has you trapped under and between his arms, he intensely stares into your eyes like there's something so intriguing happening in them.

A hand wraps around your neck to angle your head for a deep kiss, he starts thrusting into you again so slowly but each thrust sends him deeper into you.

He hits you right on the spot repeatedly but you want to play it fair, you want him to cum first before you do.

It seems like he's not going to last long as his movements are getting sloppy, his breathing is ragged and heavy. You clung to him, wrapping your legs around his waist, and let him ram into you, chasing his high.

"That feels so good," you breathlessly mutter into his ear, not letting the pleasure goes unnoticed this time around.

"Seungmin oh..." you mutter with a broken moan.

That seems to work since he starts to pick up the pace, tirelessly moving in and out of you. He rakes your hands from around his shoulders, intertwining his hands with yours and pinning them on each side of you

For a second, you dare to stare back and feel the warmth of his brown eyes.

And this is the closest you've ever seen of him.

"Seungmin..." you unconsciously call for him like you need the assurance that you didn't dream all of this.

He tenderly kisses you in response to your call, summoning the butterflies to start flying around in your stomach.

And these butterflies used to make you sick but now these butterflies make you fly away.

Seungmin lets out a raw groan and stifles a thrust as he finally hits his high. Little did you know that you were cumming as well a moment after him.

He kisses your open mouth for a sloppy kiss then buries his head in the crook of your neck, panting so close to your ear.

Your arms are wrapped around him as you also try to rearrange your breathing.

"So, do you like me now?" Seungmin suddenly asks.

You're too tired to even lift your hand but you can't help but laugh at his question, how he is still able to ask you that question in a moment like this.

You turn your head to the side to look at him, "ask me again when you're not inside me."

-

You wake up the next day to the smell of coffee wafting through the bedroom door left ajar, you're still too drowsy to put on something so you wrap yourself with a blanket and drag it with you.

Seungmin is brewing coffee in the kitchen, pouring hot water with utmost concentration like he was doing surgery rather than brewing a pot of coffee.

"Morning!" You greet with a sleepy smile and sit on the empty stool facing the kitchen island.

He looks up and there's a faint, wry smile on his face at the sight of you wrapped in his blanket.

"Coffee?" He offers.

"Yes, please!"

He turns around and opens the top cabinet to get a mug, places it in front of you then pours the hot steaming coffee. Even just the smell of it awakens you almost instantly and you inhale more of it before taking a small sip.

"Are you working today?" He asks.

You nod since you're too busy sipping your coffee to provide a verbal answer.

Seungmin pours himself a cup of coffee too and wraps his hands around it, "what time does your shift start?"

You clear your throat and answer, "later in the afternoon. I'm working full shift on the weekend."

He carefully sips his coffee, "want me to drive you there?"

"Just drive me home. I can get to work myself," you kindly refuse his offer and sip your coffee again.

He nods and puts down his mug on the countertop, he looks so calm like last night left no impression on him whatsoever.

Is it normal that you feel a little disappointed with that?

"I need to shower," you blurt out and hastily take a sip of your coffee.

"New toothbrush on the second drawer and clean towels on the top rack," he informs.

"What about you?" You ask while holding the mug close to your lips.

"Huh?"

"Don't you need to shower too?"

"I've already showered," he says.

You scoff and sip your coffee for one last time, "of course you are!"

Once you put down your mug, you stop clutching the blanket and let it drop onto the floor. You ignore the goosebumps raised on your skin from being exposed to the cool morning air.

You boldly look at him but he stays unfazed, sipping his coffee while looking back at you.

You scoff in disbelief and get up from the stool, standing in front of him only in your underwear.

"It's your loss!" You say to him before leaving for the bathroom with your attempt to lure him has come to a failure.

There's a knock on the door as you're putting on your dress from last night, "Come in!"

Seungmin comes in through the door and sees you struggling to zip up your dress, "let me help you," he says, coming to stand behind you.

You put all of your hair to the side and let him help you, "thanks!"

Seungmin then sits on the end of the bed, "Come here! I'll help you dry your hair," he pats the space next to him.

Instead of sitting there, you sit on his lap and put your hand around his shoulder.

He sighs and reaches for the towel in your hand, putting them around your head to gently dry your hair with it. His eyes are looking somewhere else, he looks into your eyes then at your lips, and back to your eyes again.

"Don't look at me like that if you're not going kiss me," you say with your fingers lazily scratching the hair on the back of his head.

He pauses and looks at you, "who says I'm not going to kiss you?"

He lowers his hand to the nape of your neck and holds you there as he presses a kiss on your lips, slowly at first but the moment he puts his other hand on your waist, he kisses you harder, deeper.

His slick tongue invades your mouth to taste you more while your hand fisted the collar of his shirt.

If only you didn't need to breathe, you wouldn't have to gently push him away and break the kiss. He smiles when he looks at you and continues drying your hair with the towel like nothing has happened.

Seungmin lends you one of his hoodies for you to put on over your dress, he helps by putting it on you like you don’t know how to put it on yourself.

A grin rises on his face when your head pops through the opening of the hoodie, he is quick to fix your hair for you and put it behind your ear.

Something about it makes your heart pitter-patter, it's so unlike you to melt just from a simple gesture but you get the urge to peck his lips and so you did.

He stops the car by the entrance of your apartment building since you insist that you will get to work yourself.

"Want me to pick you up after work?"

You hate to ask him something and bother him with it but the idea of seeing him again makes it a little hard to resist, "I would love that," you beam.

He nods, "alright then!"

You unbuckle the safety belt and grab your bag, ready to leave.

"I'll see you later then," you say and reach for the lock of the car door.

He grabs you by the sleeve of your hoodie, "so, do you like me now?"

You stop on your track and burst into a laugh, he still won't stop asking you the question even though it's obvious what the answer is. You just know that he's merely curious and not faking it either.

You pull him by the front of his shirt and give him a long peck on the lips as an answer. He didn't expect that, that when you let go, his mouth hangs open.

"Bye!" You say, flashing him a smile before getting out of the car.

-

You're not supposed to feel this way, right?

Listening to love songs and they start to make sense. Nice weather makes you feel sentimental. You're mad when he keeps calling you on the phone but hates it when he doesn't. He looks at you all mushy and follows you like a puppy, strangely, you enjoy it.

Everything about it is so cute and you wonder how you didn't get sick in the stomach from all of that.

You get off work and Seungmin is waiting in his car, you break into a run like you can't wait to meet him again, at least you know that's a fact.

"How's work?" He asks the moment you sit on the passenger's side.

"Alright, I guess," you answer.

"Hungry?"

"Famished," you reply with a frown.

He takes something from the backseat of his car, and to your surprise, it's a bouquet of flowers. You can't help but smile, then burst out laughing when you realized that something like this would make you groan in disgust.

In reality, receiving flowers like this is kind of nice and they smell wonderful too.

"What is this?" You fake an annoyed pout at him, "I can't eat this!"

He chuckles and takes something else from the backseat of the car, a bag of food, and put it on your lap.

Your smile grows wider and you impatiently rummage inside to take out the food he bought for you.

"Eat well!" He says and turns the car engine on.

Every day for the past two weeks after the date is spent like this, apart from meeting you at the campus, he picks you up from work and stays over at your place after.

You both huddle on your small worn-out couch which will ultimately lead to a make-out session and time flies fast when you're spending it with someone you really like.

He slowly lets go of the kiss and pecks you on the lips. You take this as a cue that its midnight and he's going to leave soon, you heavily sigh before speaking.

"It's midnight and the nice guy has to go home?" You sneer at him with your hands fixing the collars of his shirt.

He hovers above you and brushes your hair to the side, you like it whenever he do that, you feel somehow admired and taken care of.

"It's midnight..." he pauses to peck your lips, "so it's time for bed."

Your ears perked up like hearing something so exciting, "huh?"

"We should go to bed and you must be tired too, right?"

You hesitate to ask but you need to know if he plans on spending the night with you, "Are you staying?"

"Or you prefer this nice guy to leave?" He asks back, getting back at you for all of your snarky comments about him.

You change into comfortable clothes, smirking when you catch Seungmin has been watching you through the reflection of the bathroom mirror.

You take a stand next to him and brush your teeth together facing the sink, you lend him the biggest t-shirt you have in your closet for him to wear to bed.

It feels nice when you finally lay down on the bed after a long day, it feels exceptionally nice that Seungmin is lying next to you.

Never in a million years, did you like having someone invading your private space like this but in the nicest way possible.

He kisses your forehead and says, "Goodnight!"

You turn to face him on the bed and pout, "We're just going to sleep and do nothing?"

He lowly chuckles with eyes closed, "yes."

You exhale a long breath while looking up at the ceiling, "this is so lame," you grumble.

"I am lame," Seungmin casually says.

"Very, very lame," you say but nuzzle your head into his neck.

As tired as you are, you can't fall asleep because your heart keeps beating fast like you just ran a mile instead of lying on the bed for the past hour.

You watch him sleep with his arm around you and you get to hold him close, smelling his musky scent that you like so much, and stare at his face as much as you want.

Love is some hocus pocus shit, got you completely bewitched.

Then you got reminded of something, you carefully get off the bed without waking Seungmin in the process and tiptoe to the kitchen.

The flower bouquet Seungmin gave to you is still lying on the kitchen counter, you hurriedly fill a pitcher with water and put the flowers in it.

They're so pretty, you touch the delicate petals and admire them, smell the floral scent that relaxes you.

You have a glass of water before returning to the bedroom, standing by the doorway to watch Seungmin sleeping so soundly in your bed and he's wearing your clothes, looking like he belongs there in the first place.

"Stop watching me sleep, creep!" He mutters without opening his eyes.

You giggle for being caught red-handed, rush to him to lie on top of him. He groans when you put all of your weight on him then pulls the duvet and put it over you.

"You know you're more attractive when you're quiet and still," you joke.

He puts your hands around you and holds you tight for a second, he manages to land a kiss on your head with his eyes closed.

"So.... do you like me now?" He asks.

Is that even a question? Here's an answer then.

Seungmin is smart, he's nice, and thoughtful. He can be mean but he's honest. He has a weird sense of humor. He not only has a puppy smile, but he acts like one too. He has nice square shoulders, is a good kisser, and knows how to eat you out. Seungmin is great and likes you so much but love is just...

Fuck! You think this is it. This is love.

-

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Once I go home, I’ll be able to see my ATE albums 🤧🤧🤧

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everyone adores you (i hate that i do too) - kim seungmin

includes: seungmin x reader, friends to enemies to strangers to friends to lovers?? (kinda academic rivals vibe) college au, soft dom! seungie, everyone knows they r in love except them, kinda slow burn? idk, fluff, angst, quick vanilla smut scene at the end, unprotected sex, possessive seungmin, creampie oopsie woopsie, felix is lowk seungmin's downfall lmao

a/n: the people have chosen, thank u for those who voted on the poll!! i know this is so ridiculously late but ive been in a writer's funk lately and ive just been so unmotivated #rant anyway i hope you guys like this one:') chan x hybrid felix x reader up next?? :00

wc: 12k YAPPING ofc my longest fic is of my husband #seungminlover #myMan

"there's nothing i can do for you, mr. kim. you failed to submit the third reflection essay. i have been considerate with your other late submissions..." the middle aged professor sighs, bringing a hand to his forehead and massaging his temples in frustration.

seungmin's hands wrap tighter around the strap of his bag, nylon almost burning against his palm due to the friction. "mr. park," he almost whines, leaning forward in his chair.

seungmin's desperate. he needs to pass this class, a prerequisite to all of his majors. he'll be damned if he takes his classes later than everyone else. "please, there must be something i can do. anything for extra credit. i really really need to pass this class." his voice slightly breaks, so close to tears. he can feel the red hot embarrassment that washes over him at the thought of having to explain why he cant enlist in the same classes as his friends.

he's never gonna hear the end of it when he tells his parents, always hard on his ass about biting off more than he can chew and he's always shrugged them off. how is everything so different now? in highschool he was juggling acads, being president of the student council, being in choir, dance, band, and the debate team. and now? four classes and a stupid glee club and hes falling behind.

his worst fear.

the older man swallows thickly, obviously uncomfortable at his student's sudden show of vulnerability. "mr. kim, i really want to help you. but im afraid there's no extra work i can give you to help you raise your grade.

seungmin shakes his head, slumping deep in his seat.

"normally i'd offer that you could check some papers and-"

"i'll do it!" seungmin yells, almost jumping out of his seat.

"but another student has already offered to be my teaching assistant for this term for extra credit as well.... unless you could convince them to split the workload... id consider raising your grade."

"sir, anything! who do i have to convince?" seungmin lets out a sigh of relief. and he thought all hope was lost.

"miss y/l/n. do you know her?"

fuck. all hope is lost.

you huff as you push open the heavy metal doors to your apartment building, canvas bag filled to the brim with papers you're supposed to check. the weight is heavy on your shoulder, strap digging uncomfortably into your skin. the sting lingers as you waddle over to your apartment locker, dropping the bag as you dig into your coat pocket for your keys.

"oh, y/n! im glad i caught you." you turn around to see a kind face smiling at you from the foot of the stairs, long blonde hair tied somewhat neatly to keep strands away from his neck. stubborn clumps of hair fall over his forehead, sticking to the skin in a thin sheen of sweat.

"hyunjin?" you squeal, leaving all your bags right there on the floor as you run towards your childhood friend. your arms wrap around his neck as he laughs, arms coming up to wrap around your waist. you nearly knock him off his feet from the force that you throw yourself at him, but he cant blame you. it has been way too long.

"but... what are you doing here? i thought you were still in paris?" you chuckle, breathless as you pull apart from him.

"non!," he teases, but his smile quickly shifts. "due to some, ah- unfortunate circumstances, i had to return home a little earlier than i had planned," he shrugs, grabbing your arm and hooking it with his.

"oh cut the bullshit, hwang." you laugh, pulling him towards your locker. "tell me what happened," you groan, bending down to pick up your bag. hyunjin, ever the gentleman, quickly reacts from beside you, taking it away from you before slinging it over his own shoulder. "tell me what really happened, hm? it's me." you huff, punching him lightly on the shoulder.

he smiles sadly at you, shaking his head. he knows he cant lie to you. "how about we catch up over a cup of coffee, huh? my, ive been looking all over campus for you and when we finally meet after three years you dont even invite me in?" he pouts at you.

you roll your eyes at his dramatics. nice to know he hasnt changed that about himself. dare you say paris has only fed his dramatic flare? "let's go have some coffee somewhere else then, my apartment's kinda messy right now. oh! have you told felix you're back? you guys are... okay now, right?" you're careful to watch his expression at the mention of his past lover.

"no, he doesnt know im home. it kinda defeats the whole purpose of the surprise, you know?" he retorts, watching you with a fond smile as you shove your phone and keys back into your pockets. "and yes. felix and i are alright, thank you for asking."

"well, i'm sure he'd love to see you again. i know where he's working. maybe we could drop by for some drinks?"

hyunjin hums thoughtfully at that, chuckling a bit once you push open the damned metal door. "i guess it wouldnt hurt to say hello? besides. we have been... talking again."

"oh is that so?" you feign disinterest, eyes trained on the leaves that crunch under your feet.

he hums once more, squinting when he looks up, the sun beaming against his face. how he's missed its' warmth. paris was often gloomy. "we discussed possibly trying again." he says calmly, sighing with content.

you falter, "that might be good. ive always known you guys still loved each other! besides, you guys were young and stupid."

"that we were." hyunjin laughs. "well how about you and... ah- he who must not be named?"

you tense a little at that, opting to play it off with a shrug. "havent seen him around much, actually."

"well that's odd. you three were the only ones from our highschool to pass SNU and you guys dont keep in touch?"

"well i dont keep in touch with people from highschool much." you bite back.

"well how about me and felix?" he challenges.

"yea. just you two."

"arent you two in the same major?"

"we have different schedules. never aligns."

"but yuna and lia said-"

"i just dont see seungmin much, alright? that's that!" you groan, shoving your hands into your pockets.

"oh my dear y/n, nothing has changed! have you tried to patch things up with him? after all we were, hm what did you say, ah- young and stupid?"

"well he certainly was." you mumble, and hyunjin bursts out laughing. he throws an arm over your shoulder, pulling you closer against his side. "god, i've missed you."

felix absolutely adores his job. he gets to help bake in the kitchens in the morning, and then he gets to make such fun little drinks while listening to music he chooses. he loves his coworkers, and his schedule is flexible, what with the manager knowing how most of his staff are all college students. the one thing he hates though? dealing with rude customers.

"i apologize, sir. our drinks are served in plastic cups as most of our customers dont finish their drink here, it's easier to take out in case you need to leave in a hurry." felix can feel the sweat start to form at his hairline, trickling slowly down his forehead as his cheeks twitch in a forced smile.

"well if i knew you served it in plastic cups, i never would have ordered!" the middle-aged man in front of him yells, eyebrows raised. students in the cafe have started to look over, trying hard to be discreet. some look annoyed, others clearly show how they feel sorry for felix.

felix tries his best to keep his smile, but he can feel anger and annoyance rise in him like hot water boiling deep in his gut.

"what the fuck is the difference??" he wants to scream, grab the stupid plastic cup from his stupid chubby fingers and throw it right in his stupid ugly face.

"im sorry sir, is there some kind of problem here?" a calm voice calls from behind the man, who turns around in surprise.

seungmin stands with his hands in his pockets, a small smile on his lips. he's dressed in nothing fancy, a university hoodie and some sweatpants. he's only supposed to catch up with felix as he busies himself around the cafe after all. his hair is tucked neatly in his cap, the perfect image of your average college student.

felix swears he's an angel sent from the heavens.

"this is none of your business, kid." the man snorts disgustingly, waving a chubby finger in seungmin's face.

"well, actually this is a public space and you're holding up the line. so yea, it kinda is my business. besides, you're on university grounds, i have every right to be here as a student." seungmin says coolly, taking a step towards the counter so he's able to somewhat position himself in between felix and this gross ugly man.

"listen, i'm a paying customer, so-"

"and the staff has the right to refuse service to anyone unless on the basis of race, religion, or ethnicity- isn't that right, felix?"

and its like suddenly felix has found his voice. he stands a little taller, leaning forward to get closer to the man's face. "that's right."

"and you're not refusing to serve this man because hes white or anything, right?" seungmin eggs him on, throwing the man a somewhat bored look.

"no. its because hes an asshole."

"hey-" the man steps forward, hands raised.

"well you heard him!" seungmin cuts the man off before he can continue, fully stepping in front of felix now. "if you dont leave within the next ten seconds, i'm calling security. they take peace and order on school grounds very seriously, you know?"

the man huffs, turning around and slamming the door behind him so hard that the little bell that jingles near the doorframe rattles wildly seconds after he's left.

"i dont know how you deal with assholes like that, felix. id probably lose my mind." seungmin sighs, throwing his friend a tight lipped smile.

"you kinda get used to it. but i've just been so tired this finals week that i dont even have the energy to stand up for myself anymore." felix shakes his head while he wipes the counter down.

seungmin nods understandingly, lunging for the man's untouched drink before felix can throw it. "this is paid, isn't it?"

"well, yes but-"

"alright, felix look. i have a problem." seungmin slides easily into one of the stools by the counter, taking a deep sip of the man's mystery drink.

felix nods in understanding, rearranging trays and cleaning up as much as he can.

"well actually, it's more of a favor? i dont know."

felix only hums, used to seungmin's rambling by now. seungmin's just like that, needs to talk to himself aloud a little before getting straight to the point.

"im actually screwed and there's no one else i can talk to because well, there's no more shame between us, yea? we've seen each other naked and ive seen you at your lowest low and youve been there for me and-"

"wow, this is pretty serious, huh?" felix jokes, pulling up a stool so he can sit in front of his friend.

"i think i'm gonna fail a class." seungmin spits out, holding his breath immediately after as he gauges his friend's reaction.

felix's smile slowly disappears. his mouth opens and closes like a fish as he tries to figure out what to say, in a state of total shock. this goes on for about five minutes before seungmin finally whines, head dropping to his hands.

"will you say something i can actually understand, felix?"

"i'm sorry i just- i dont understand. you're.... failing? you? kim seungmin? the kim seungmin?"

"wow you really know how to comfort a guy, huh?"

"i'm sorry!" felix jumps up to pull seungmin in for a half-hug, awkwardly wrapping his arms around seungmin's chest over the counter. "i just... how? why? what subject? are you sure?"

"yes, im sure. i missed a stupid submission. a major subject. look, thats not the worst part-"

"omigod you're dying. thats the only explanation-"

"no!" seungmin whines, pushing his friend off him. "the professor said he could give me extra credit-"

"but thats good news!"

"-if im able to convince... someone.... to split the task given to them with me."

"o...kay? just turn on your puppydog charm and you're good to go."

seungmin shakes his head, as if he's about to deliver such solemn news to felix that he has to pause for dramatic effect. felix rolls his eyes.

"it's... well the person is y/n."

felix stares at his friend with wide eyes, unblinking. then he tilts his head back and lets out the most obnoxious laugh, losing his breath as his neck turns a deep shade of red, the tint spreading across his cheeks all the way to the tips of his ears.

"you're joking! oh this is just too- oh, i cant breathe, ITS KARMA!" he suddenly yells, fighting for his life to breathe in as much air as possible, wiping the tears from his eyes.

seungmin winces, but deep down he knows this reaction is deserved.

his relationship with you is... a little complicated.

you met seungmin in your freshman year of highschool. you'd just moved to seoul, the New Girl. as batch rep, he was tasked with showing you around on your first day, teaching you the ropes and making you feel welcomed.

"well yea, thats basically it!" seungmin finishes, pace slowing down as he directs you to the bench just opposite the school clinic. "do you have any questions for me?" he asks with a slight tilt of his head.

your eyes stay trained on the floor, as they have been the past 30 minutes that this strange boy has toured you around the school. you shake your head. seungmin doesnt fully understand it yet, but somewhere deep down, he feels bad for you. you seem like the shy type, and he knows how hard it is to adjust and make new friends. god knows how he would have survived middle school if it weren't for his friends.

"hey, what do you say you come meet my friends tomorrow during lunch break?" he suddenly asks. for the first time since his homeroom teacher introduced you, you look up at him.

he's taken aback by how pretty your eyes are.

"oh, really?" you ask timidly, voice small.

"i- i mean yea! we're in the same homeroom anyway, right? plus i think it'll help you adjust a little better if you had people you could talk to and hang out with." seungmin shrugs.

"yea. i'd really like that. thank you, seungmin." your voice is so low its almost like you're mumbling.

before you know it, you're spending your lunch breaks laughing along with felix as he embarrasses all of seungmin's friends one by one, wincing away from changbin as he threatens to lunge across the table to shut the younger boy up, hyunjin clinging dramatically onto his boyfriend's side instead of defending him.

you're spending your weekends at seungmin's house as chan makes you all listen to his new demo, han turning red in the face when his verse comes on. you're walking to school with jeongin- arms full of convenience store goodies as you make fun of your grumpy old maths teacher, leeknow following quietly behind you both, scolding you when you get too close to the road.

before you know it, you've found yourself a group of friends who makes highschool just that much bearable.

seungmin's completely enamored by you, coming to learn that you're at the top of every class that you have (except the ones you have with him, of course). you're just as ambitious as he is, joining the debate team and the mock un club, quickly joining the officers despite being a new student.

he's somewhat threatened by you, though he'd never admit it to himself, or to anyone else for that matter. you score higher than him in statistics, and he cant help the ugly feeling that settles in his chest when you show your paper to him, a bright blue 100 circled at the top.

he tries not to let it get to him, changing his mindset into seeing it as a healthy competition, a way for him to challenge himself even more in to doing better than you. it feeds his competitive side, staying longer than you in the library, sleeping later than you, reading more books.

this one sided competition makes him feel conflicted. he's out for your blood, and yet you're the same sweet, shy girl he's always been close to. you spend most of your time with seungmin, studying with him at his house, sleeping over when you've realized its way past ten in the evening, sneaking out of his house for a quick convenience store run.

"min, i'm hungry! lets go down to the store." you'd whine, voice slightly muffled against his soft sheets, tucked nice and warm under his blankets.

"go home, you've finished all the food here." he'd tease, not even bothering to look away from his homework.

"cant. you'd miss me after an hour." you'd retort, reaching blindly behind you for a plushie to throw at the back of his head.

"suppose that's true. can't help but be used to your presence when you're here nearly every day," he'd feign annoyance, exhaling loudly through his nose.

you'd pout at him when he'd finally turn in his chair to look over at you, already so at home, snuggling even deeper into his bed.

you really do have such pretty eyes.

"fine. grab your coat." and he'd try hard to fight his smile at the sound of your delighted squeals.

you found a way to break through his walls, chip away at the cement and reduce it to a fine dust which you've blown away. but he stands unguarded all the same, not even bothering to put up a fight when you wrestle your way into his heart.

he'd like to keep you there, he thinks.

sometimes he'd lie to himself and say that he tried. by your senior year, he managed to ruin the one good thing in his life.

how stupid was he?

amazing, really. how he was able to throw away three years of friendship for fifteen minutes of fame.

"how could you do this to me?" you hiss, dropping your backpack onto the floor of seungmin's bedroom. his back is faced towards you, gently shutting his door before he leans his forehead on it. he takes a deep breath, gathering enough courage to face you.

"y/n, i-"

"you embarrassed me in front of everyone. you told them everything, things i told you in confidence because i fucking trusted you. how could you do this to me, seungmin? how could you fucking do this to me?" your tears are hot, angry against your cheeks as you pace around his room. your voice grows louder with every word, reaching a scream when you stand in front of him.

"i wasn't thinking, y/n. i-"

"and for what? to make me look bad?" you laugh hollowly, hands flying to your hair in disbelief. "to make me look like some poor, fucking loser who's so mentally unstable she can't possibly become president of student council? was that your angle?"

there's a lump in seungmin's throat and no matter how hard he swallows, it just wont go down. he opens his mouth to speak, to defend himself, but his mouth has gone dry and his tongue tastes like sand.

"what the fuck is wrong with you? i thought we were friends? i thought we were best friends, seungmin? how could you air out all my shit like that? for a couple of votes? do you know how pathetic you are? is that how bad you want to be president? you're willing to throw me under the bus to make yourself look good?" you can taste the salty tears pooling in your mouth, snot slowly dripping down and creating a sticky mess on your face.

but you're too angry to care.

your chest hurts, like someone's kicked you to the ground and continuously stomped right in between your ribcage in an attempt to squash your heart. your head hurts from dehydration, and your neck is starting to feel sticky from the sweat that's pooled at the collar of your uniform.

"was this your master plan? you found out i was running against you so you sucked up to me, kept me close so you could get all the dirt? you fucking traitor, i cant believe i actually trusted you." your throat has gone raw from all the yelling, can feel the way your voice starts to come out hoarse.

"y/n, please. i'm so sorry i dont know what i was thinking. i just... when they asked me why they should vote for me my mind blanked and i-" he tries to get everything out as fast as he can, terrified you'll cut him off and start yelling again. but he can't continue because, holy shit, even he doesn't know why the fuck he did what he did.

"and you what? made me look fucking stupid so you rambled on for fifteen minutes about how much of a horrible person i am. god, if thats what you thought of me you shouldve let me know, seungmin! i couldve walked out of your life if i made you that miserable." you're starting to heave, all the air in the room suddenly disappearing.

"no, dont say that y/n. you're the best thing about me, you're my best fr-"

seungmin feels dizzy when your palm lands on his right cheek.

you cant stop sobbing, hands clutching at your chest as you shake your head. "fuck you," you whisper.

seungmin is stunned, frozen in the middle of his room with his mouth slightly open. he says nothing, does nothing as he watches you bend down weakly to grab your bag, sobbing through the motions of slinging it over your shoulders.

but then the panic starts to kick in when you push past him, your fingers reaching for his doorknob. his instincts kick in and hes wrapping his hand around your wrist.

"please don't go, please let's talk about this." his voice cracks. when did he start crying?"

you pause, and for a moment seungmin can feel the weight on his shoulder lift, all hope is not lost.

"its good to know where your priorities lie, seungmin. now i know you'll do anything to get ahead. even if that means hurting me." you tried to sound strong, but your voice comes out broken, a whimper.

"dont speak to me ever again."

you pull your hand away from him.

the weight on his shoulders is suddenly crushing.

and when he gave his acceptance speech in front of the entire student body, he frantically searched for your face. his heart dropped when his eyes locked with yours. eyes that once looked at him with so much warmth, care, and love- stared soullessly back at him.

he knew he fucked up the best thing in his life.

by the time you reach felix's cafe, hyunjin's whining had started to get on your nerves.

"i didn't ask you to carry it," you remind him, reaching for the strap.

he turns his body away from you, clutching your tote tighter against his side. "as if i'd let you carry this!"

yes, he was a gentleman. but a dramatic ass one.

"id honestly rather carry my bag than have to listen to you whine about how heavy it is."

"but it is so heavy! what the fuck did you put in here, rocks?"

you only roll your eyes, pushing open the glass door to the establishment. the tiny bell above the doorframe rings, announcing your arrival to the blonde boy behind the counter.

"oh my god, its soobin." you whisper under your breath, elbowing hyunjin in the ribs. he only looks at you puzzled, an eyebrow raised.

"he's so cute, ohmygod." you roll your eyes, quickly checking your blurry reflection on the glass door.

"not my type," hyunjin shrugs. you ignore him, walking straight to the counter.

"oh, hey soob!" you greet him, quickly shushing hyunjin when he starts to mock your airy tone. "is felix here?" you smile sweetly, trying to tame your hair from the mess caused by the strong winds outside.

"oh yea, he's over there in the booth by the window. he's not alone though," he says, wiping down the counter after spilling a few shaves of ice.

"oh, who's he with?" you ask, already making your way down the counter.

"dunno, the dude looks kinda stressed, to be honest." he shrugs, turning away from you when the bell lets him know he's got another customer to serve.

he's with a guy? he's not on a date is he? no- he wouldve told you. besides, he wouldnt have led hyunjin on either.

hyunjin follows behind you as you make your way towards the booth, heaving dramatically as he swings your tote bag off his shoulders. he crouches behind you, snickering to himself as you both slowly walk to the table, strands of felix's hair peeking out from the opposite bench.

"surprise!" hyunjin jumps from behind you, smile swiftly morphing into a face of shock, his mouth forming a small 'o'.

"holy shit, hyune! what are you doing here?"

your heart drops to the pit of your stomach. that voice-

"s-seungmin, i didnt know you were with felix."

you freeze, jaw dropped as seungmin stands. he clearly hasn't seen you yet, back facing you as he pulls hyunjin in for a hug, squeezing him tightly.

"i thought you were in paris?" felix squeals, sliding out of the booth and joining the three for a big bear hug. he's the one who finally notices you a few feet away, his smile dropping.

"y/n." he breathes, eyes wide.

when seungmin turns around, its almost as if in its slow motion.

he looks almost exactly the same, his hair a little longer, shaggier. his eyes look more tired, little bags under his eyes give away the sleepless nights he's become familiar with. his cheeks slowly turn a light pink, dusting across his nose all the way to the tip of his ears. he's dressed the way you remember him, loose comfy clothes.

he looks good, you think. you shake the thought away.

"oh, y/n." seungmin's voice is small as he locks eyes with you.

fuck, your eyes.

his first time seeing you in three years and he hates how you manage to steal his breath away. you've changed your hair, cut it a little shorter and dyed it lighter. you've pierced your ears, little sunflower earrings peaking from beneath your hair. you look so much more mature, your style has definitely changed.

but your eyes, they shine just as bright as he remembers. good to know his memory hasnt failed him yet.

"i didn't know you were coming, y/n." felix shoots you an apologetic glance, lips pursed and eyes wide.

"but i always come visit you on thursdays." you say flatly.

"yea but-"

"awh look! it's been a while since we've all seen each other, huh?" hyunjin cuts in, trying desperately to ease the tension. seungmin stays standing still, gawking stupidly at you. you try your best to pretend like you cant feel his gaze.

"yea, some of us made that decision on purpose." you mutter under your breath, but you don't miss the way seungmin's eye twitch.

felix smiles, lacing his hand with hyunjin's. "it's really been too long," he whispers, as if only meant for his lover.

"i'd really love if we could all spend some time together." hyunjin's eyes find yours, wide and pleading. "please?"

you offer him a tight lipped smile.

its already so awkward, the way felix and hyunjin slide naturally into the booth, beginning to chatter away. it leaves you and seungmin standing, stubbornly avoiding eye contact.

"do you- do you want to sit near the window, or?" seungmin's voice is small, eyes glued to the floor.

you shrug.

he nods, climbing in anyway. you take a deep breath before you move, reluctantly climbing onto the booth after him. you leave a considerable amount of space between the two of you, and seungmin can't help but roll his eyes.

it's been nearly three years, he thinks. how are you still holding a grudge against him? he clears his throat, about to start some small talk, but something stops him. maybe its the way you deliberately angle your body away from him, or the way you pull your phone out to scroll aimlessly, almost as if you were anticipating his move.

"so, how was paris?" seungmin asks hyunjin instead, shifting his body away from you. fine, be like that. at least hes not immature enough to make things awkward on purpose.

"oh, it was so romantic!" hyunjin exclaims, throwing his arm over felix's shoulder and resting it on the back of their booth. "it was a little depressing, actually. being in such a beautiful place all alone."

"well yea, but it was worth it right? who wouldve thought your one true love was right here all along." you tease, wiggling your eyebrows up and down.

"yea so is yours!" hyunjin teases you back. you only stick your tongue out.

beside you, seungmin tenses. surely, hyunjin isnt implying that he could be your true love, could he? the thought makes chest ache, an odd yearning to move closer to you, to let his fingers "accidentally" brush against yours-

"oh, soobin!" felix giggles, catching on.

seungmin's always hated that guy. from the moment he met soobin thirty minutes ago, he knew something was off. you can't date soobin, he wouldnt know how to take care of you. with his stupid blonde hair, his stupid bunny smile, his stupidly large eyes.

he bets soobin doesnt even know what your favorite type of ramen is, what your go-to snacks are, what your favorite flavor of ice cream is. important things that a lover should know.

things he knows.

oh, where'd that thought come from?

"shut up, you guys!" you hiss, checking to see if soobin is within earshot. you frown at felix, swatting across the table at his chest.

"what do you mean? you guys would look so cute together." hyunjin argues, quickly turning to catch a glimpse of soobin. you hide your face in your hands, profusely shaking your head as you sink deeper into the booth.

seungmin cant help the feeling of jealousy that bubbles deep in his gut. hes half scared hes going to projectile vomit all over the table when you straighten yourself out, sneaking a peek at the blonde boy who busies himself with creating a customer's drink.

"im probably not his type." you mumble.

"you're not." seungmin's shocked at the word that's slipped, hand quickly coming up to cover his mouth in shock.

all eyes are on him, and he can see the way you look at him, with your empty eyes staring right at his face. he hates it when you look at him like that, misses the way your eyes used to shine just for him.

"actually you know what, im getting kinda tired, i think im gonna go home instead." you blurt out, already reaching for your bag.

hyunjin's hand finds yours on the table, and he squeezes gently. "really?"

you swiftly pull your hand away. "yes. really."

"you know what, it doesnt matter. i actually made a reservation for us lixie. wasn't planning on staying long anyways. just wanted to surprise you." hyunjin sings sweetly, brushing away a stand of hair that had fallen on felix's cheek.

"yea, i think i'm gonna head home too." seungmin clears his throat.

just then, the sound of thunder roars outside, clouds a dark grey as they hang low.

fuck. just when you decided not to bring an umbrella.

"yea, i think we better get going. dont wanna get caught in the rain." felix sighs, gathering his stuff and offering hyunjin his hand.

"dont you have spare umbrellas here, lix? maybe we could borrow them. you know, just in case." as if on cue, the rain starts to come down heavily, droplets splattering against the window.

"yea, but there's only two." felix mutters, quickly slipping behind the counter to grab two black umbrellas leaning against the wall. "hyunjin and i can share, and maybe you and y/n-"

"i'm fine." you say stubbornly, arms crossed in front of your chest.

you'd rather die than spend two seconds alone with kim seungmin.

"oh dont say that, you'll get drenched and catch a cold." hyunjin sighs, grabbing one of the umbrellas from felix's hand and offering it to you.

"i'd actually prefer that, thanks." you snap, swatting his hand away.

hyunjin opens his mouth to berate you, but seungmin quickly steps in, reaching for the umbrella. "i'll handle this guys, you go enjoy your dinner."

you fume at that. 'oh he'll handle it? who the fuck does this guy think he is?'

you roll your eyes, pushing past your friends and heading for the door. you stand under the roof, crossing your arms in front of your chest as a cold chill blows past you. hyunjin and felix soon exit as well, wrapped tightly in their coats, hands entwined.

hyunjin steps towards you, pulling you in for a hug despite your protests. "be nice," he whispers, before planting a kiss on your cheek. you make a move to wipe it away, but hesitate when you see hyunjin pout.

"have a nice date." you mumble, watching as the pair huddles close under the umbrella, making their way to felix's car.

you hear the door open, and you hold your breath.

"let me walk you home." seungmin offers, his tone stern. this only ticks you off, wanting nothing more than to defy him despite his offer being in your best interest. your apartment is a good walk away, and the papers in your tote bag risk the chance of getting wet.

"i mean you- you live near my building, right?" he pleads, clicking his umbrella open. he waits patiently for you to respond, standing awkwardly by the sidewalk as you fight with your pride.

you nod, and thats all seungmin needs. he's by your side in an instant, holding the umbrella nearer to your side to ensure that not even an inch of you gets wet from the rain. his left side is already completely soaked, cringing at the feel of his cold hoodie sticking to his skin, but he ignores it. you set a fast pace, and his heart hurts at the though that it's probably because you can't stand to spend more time with him than you need to.

he notices you wince from the weight of your bag, taking a deep breath as you readjust the strap from falling off your shoulder.

"let me carry it," he's being bold, already reaching for the damn thing before you can say anything.

"i dont need any more favors." you snap, the first words you've directly said to him in nearly three years. he's glad you've at least acknowledged his existence now, but your words are sharp.

he lets it go, humming to let you know that he heard you. your pace quickens just a bit, eager to get home, out of the rain, and away from seungmin. your tote swings from the movement, getting caught on a nearby bush and very nearly pulling you back.

you lose your balance and slip, falling flat on your butt on the wet pavement. you try to brake your fall, scratching your palms in the process.

"oh my god, are you okay?" seungmin rushes down, still holding the umbrella over your head. he offers his hand to help you up, but you swat it away.

"i'm fine, alright? god, stop hovering!" you yell, pushing down on your scratched palms to help yourself up. you wince at the pain, brushing off tiny pebbles and bits of gravel from your open wound.

"y/n, you're bleeding." seungmin gawks, hand reaching out to touch yours. you quickly yank it out of his reach, almost as if you were hiding your palm from him.

"yea, thanks for the info." you mumble, trying your best to wipe away the mud that's splattered all over your jeans. seungmin moves quickly while you're preoccupied, crouching down to grab at your tote bag. he ignores your whines of protest, slinging it over his shoulder.

you let out a groan when he refuses to hand it back to you. "fine, whatever. suffer." you grumble, crossing your arms before walking away. seungmin quickly catches up to you, shielding you from the rain.

the walk home is painfully quiet. you're hyperaware of every movement he makes, every time he inhales, the way he clears his throat, as if he's about to say something before he changes his mind. all these emotions swirl angirly inside of you, most of them you cant even begin to comprehend.

because for some reason, you miss him. and it hits you like a truck when the sleeve of his hoodie grazes your elbow, the soft cloth reaching for you. it takes everything in you not to break down and grab for him, to hold him close and strangle him, to wrap your arms around him and hug him so tight he loses breath and dies of suffocation.

he smells the same, like the seungmin you remember who used to walk you home after band practice. the seungmin who held your hand in secret as you walked through the haunted house that one halloween. the seungmin who'd sing to you, alone in his room with his guitar on his lap.

your seungmin.

how could this stranger beside you be your seungmin?

how is it possible that the very same person who knows your deepest darkest secrets, your most embarrassing moments, your dreams and fears- is someone who doesn't know you at all?

seungmin stands stiff beside you as you reach the lobby of your apartment, shaking the little droplets of rain off the umbrella. he opens the door for you, urging you to enter before him.

"i'll have my bag back now, thanks." you say in monotone, eyes not even meeting his.

"let me carry it up." a bold request.

"i'm fine now, you know? im not some damsel in distress in need of saving." you mumble, standing your ground.

seungmin ignores you, already walking towards the elevator. he leaves it on hold, waiting a few seconds before you enter as well, grumbling under your breath.

once you reach your floor, you lead the way to your room, with seungmin trailing slowly behind you. he's shivering a little from the cold, the wet of his jacket only making the draft on the floor feel like ice against his skin. you notice, the little devil on your shoulder pleased at his suffering.

but there's another side of you that softens when you notice the way his teeth chatter, a shudder going down his whole body. god, you're gonna regret even opening your mouth-

"you can come in to warm up a little." you mumble, reaching into your coat pocket to fetch your keys.

seungmin merely blinks at you, unsure if he heard you correctly, or if his imagination was so strong that he managed to picture you saying the thing he so desperately wanted to hear.

but then you walk in, and you leave your door open. for him.

"oh, thanks." seungmin mutters awkwardly, reaching for the cup of tea you offer him. the warmth spreads from his fingertips to his palms, and he's genuinely grateful for the heat it provides. you only hum, grabbing your tote bag from the floor and setting it on the couch.

you pour yourself a cup, sitting directly opposite of the strange boy in your apartment. you blow away some of the steam that rises from the cup, eyes trained on the way the liquid ripples from the force of your breath.

seungmin opens his mouth to speak, but he cant seem to find the words to say what he wants to say. i'm sorry? no thats too lame. i miss you? fuck no, way too forward. how about-

"you're shivering." you point out, staring directly into seungmin's eyes.

his breath hitches. you're looking at him.

actually looking at him.

"oh, i- i didn't even notice." he lies. despite the fact that you turned your heater on, he's fucking freezing. his hoodie is heavy with rain and damp against his skin, sending shivers all the way up his arm and down his spine.

suddenly you stand, retreating into your room without a word. seungmin's confused, unsure if that's his cue that he's overstayed his welcome. but then you come back into the kitchen after a few seconds, holding a large blue hoodie in your arms.

his heart clenches when you unfurl it, revealing the old hoodie he'd given you a month before your graduation. he didnt even know you got it in the mail when he sent it. you werent even talking to him at that point. does that mean you'd gotten his letter too?

"well, i didnt wanna get rid of it, you know? would be a waste." you mumble. you toss it over to him, the cloth landing on his lap with a soft thud. he looks stupidly down at it, brain malfunctioning.

"you should change out of your sweater. you're wet. dripping all over my floor." you grumble, snatching seungmin's empty cup and setting it down on the counter behind him.

"you kept it?" seungmin whispers.

"like i said. didnt want it-"

"you kept it." seungmin turns to look at you.

his deep brown eyes are hopeful, crease in his brows giving away the myriad of emotions swirling deep in his stomach.

you stay silent, back turned towards him. you can feel the tears that pool behind your eyelids, threatening to fall as you hold yourself over the sink, turning your head completely away from seungmin. you hear the sound of fabric rustling, and your cheeks warm at the thought of him undressing in the middle of your kitchen.

the sound of wood scratching against your kitchen tiles is loud, the abruptness of seungmin standing up nearly sending the chair backwards.

"smells like you." he whispers. he cant trust his voice.

he takes a step towards you, your back still towards him.

"i think its time for you to go." you hiccup, a steady stream of tears flowing down your cheeks.

"look at me." seungmin begs, taking another step.

"you should go now, seungmin."

"look me in the eye when you tell me. then i will."

he's getting bold, standing right behind you, his chest pressing the back of your head. you whirl around, ready to yell at him, to scream at him, to slap him, to furl your hands into fists and beat against his chest.

but he's quicker, wrapping both his arms around your shoulders and pressing you close to him, tucking your head under his chin. he holds you like this for so long you figure its been hours. you stain the front of his chest with your tears, hands weakly wrapping around him, fingers curling into the fabric.

he still feels like seungmin.

your seungmin.

"you kept it. you got my letter too, didn't you sweetheart?" he whispers, as if afraid raising his voice would ruin the spell.

you sob violently against his chest, holding him tighter against you.

"i meant every single word," he squeezes you tightly, "i'm so sorry."

"you're an asshole, kim seungmin." you sob, shaking your head.

"i know, i know. i'm so sorry." he shushes you, smoothing down your hair, planting a soft kiss on the top of your head.

"do you know how much it hurts?" you sob, pulling away from him. "i see you almost everyday. you have the face of someone who knows every single thing about me, but you're a complete stranger to me." you sob into your hands, pouring your heart out to him.

"i know," he sniffles, wiping away the snot under your nose with his free hand.

"no, you dont. stop fucking saying that." you pull your face away from him, pushing his hand down. "you were my best friend and you- now its like i dont know you and-" you're hiccuping, heaving, out of breath as you break down.

"i'm sorry, sweetheart, okay? i'm so so sorry. i was so stupid,"

"well yea!" you yell, falling into him when he opens his arms up to you.

he chuckles dryly at that, holding you tightly against him, as if terrified you'd change your mind and kick him out of your home. and he cant bear to see it, the way you look up at him with tears in your eyes, bloodshot red and full of resentment. he wants to fix it so bad, misses the way you'd hold softness in your eyes reserved especially for him.

"i'll make it right," he promises, nuzzling his cheek against the top of your head. "i'll prove it to you, okay? i promise."

you sniffle, shaking your head. "i- i dont know,"

"hey, look at me." seungmin pulls you away from him, bending slightly so you're eye to eye. "i promise, i'll do everything i can to gain back your trust. i just miss you so much, y/n. i- i really fucked up and to this day it remains my greatest regret."

you stay quiet, eyes flickering between either of his. "even more than when you shaved your head that one summer?" you joke weakly.

seungmin can feel his heart pounding at the sight of your small smile. he thinks he sees your eyes twinkle. "yes, sweetheart. even more than that. i just... please. give me another chance. give me a chance to make it right with you, y/n."

you take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. seungmin's steadily crying, wiping the tears away with the back of his hand as he looks at you, expectantly. you stay quiet for so long seungmin can hear the blood rushing all the way to his head, going dizzy with anticipation and fear.

"you'll have to buy me lots of gummies, you know?" you mumble, looking up at him.

fuck. he'd buy you all the gummies in the world if it meant you'd keep looking at him with those eyes.

the words on your screen have started to blur altogether, vision hazy as you mindlessly scroll through the hundreds of pages of readings and notes youve been reviewing for the past...... god, was there even a time you weren't studying? even the music playing through your headphones have lost its appeal, sounding more and more like radio static.

you jolt out of your trance at the sound of books slamming against the surface of your table, which shakes under the weight. you quickly pull your headphones off and look up at the intruder, who smiles sheepishly at you.

"sorry, did i wake you?" seungmin asks, pulling up a chair beside you.

"no, you saved me." you groan, stretching your whole body until your limbs start to vibrate.

seungmin only laughs, sinking deep into his chair. he takes his cap off and runs his fingers through his hair. he scoots a little closer to you, then bends the other way to retrieve a little brown paper bag.

"i brought you breakfast." he says, rolling his eyes at the way you pout at him.

"seungmin, you didnt!" you gasp, receiving the tall cup of iced coffee with eager hands.

"i did this for myself, actually." he claims, pulling out some warm bread to share with you. "dont want you grumpy all morning. what time did you come in? you look like shit. no offense."

you shrug, taking a long sip of the cold drink.

"wait, weren't you wearing that last night when i left? y/n.. dont- oh my god, dont tell me you spent the whole night here?"

you stare blankly back at him. "our final exam is in three days."

"do you plan on staying awake until then?" seungmin bites sarcastically, and you kick his chair.

"i have to atleast get a 97 on his exam or else i wont finish his class with high honors." you whine, running your fingers through your hair in frustration.

you're so much like him, seungmin thinks. he, too, is familiar with sacrificing his happiness for a perfect grade. except now he has to work just as hard as you just to pass. the thought leaves a bitter taste in his mouth.

"you have to get some sleep or you wont finish his class at all." he threatens, staring down at you.

you only frown, but you dont need that much convincing, as you're already closing your laptop shut, scooting your chair just that much closer to seungmin's so your arm grazes his.

"wake me up in thirty minutes." you grumble, linking your arm with his and resting your head on his shoulder. he raises it a little to grant you comfort, unbothered by the fact that his arm will inevitably start to tense and ache.

"sweet dreams," he hums, discreetly kissing the top of your head as he pretends to look at the empty chair next to you.

ten minutes pass, and you're already snoring. your fair falls in a mess in front of your face, and seungmin has to hold back from sweeping your hair away in fear that he'd accidentally wake you up. he cant help but feel his chest swell at the feeling of you leaning on him, he feels like a highschooler high with giddiness, trying hard not to vibrate in his seat.

screw the readings, he can barely keep you out of his head. this past month has been an absolute dream to him, spending every waking moment by your side. treating you to almost every single meal, keeping you company as you run your errands, crashing at yours to study and just goof around.

this is how he remembers you- full of life, playful, just a little mischievous. so positively alluring that seungmin feels himself falling in love with you. it hit him like a brick that night you passed out with papers strewn across your bed, your limbs tangling with his. he didnt sleep a wink that night, too busy studying your face. you looked so peaceful, he remembers, burying your face in the crook of his neck and holding him tightly in your sleep.

he looks down at you now, cant stop the smile from spreading across his face. he'll let you sleep for a little longer, he decides. he doesnt care if you get upset with him (you will), you deserve the rest. seungmin's about to finally clear his head of you and actually get some studying done when he locks eyes with a tall blonde from across the room.

god, of all the people.

"oh, hey! seungmin, right? felix's friend?" soobin says in a low voice as he approaches the table.

"yea, soobin right?" stupid fucking name.

"yea. hey- is that y/n?" he nods towards your sleeping figure.

ew. stop looking at her. "oh, yea. she passed out."

"damn, she's really studious, huh? ran into her late last night when she was here all alone." soobin sighs, frowning at you.

seungmin wants to puke at the thought of you spending time alone with soobin. he wants to ask him so many questions like- how long did you talk to her for? what did you guys talk about? how much can i pay you to leave her alone?

"yea, shes hardworking. i admire her for that." seungmin smiles fondly.

"oh... wait- are.. are you guys, like, a thing? or something?" soobin takes a step back and seungmin's breath hitches in his throat.

"cuz if you guys are, i can totally back off, you know?"

seungmin stays silent, weighing his options. he could lie and say you guys were dating, but if you found out, you'd probably hate him and ignore him for the rest of his life and he'd rather die than let that happen. on the other hand, if he tells the truth, soobin would obviously try to pursure you. and he knows you have a little crush on him too.

seungmin bites his lower lip, then shakes his head. "nah, we're just friends." seungmin can feel some bile rise in his throat. not for long, he thinks cockily.

"oh, cool cool. uhm, if you could do me a favor, man? just... i dunno ask her to go to the cafe again this week? maybe i'll work up the courage to ask her out or something." soobin chuckles, cheeks turning a deep red.

seungmin can only nod. finally soobin offers him a small smile and leaves. there's a heavy feeling in seungmin's stomach, almost as if he'd been punched in the gut. he cant even begin to imagine you dating someone else, in fear that he'd just break down right then and there.

its kinda pathetic, really. you're not even his yet and he's already thinking of all the ways he can get soobin to leave you alone. he wants to print a large sign that says "do not approach, angry guard dog will bite" over your head, just to keep everyone else away from you.

god, since when was he this possessive?

he spends the next forty minutes thinking of ways to get you to be his. and when you finally stir awake, the first thing that seungmin says is-

"we should stop going to felix's cafe."

obviously, you dont listen.

you go to felix's cafe anyways, except you're always alone. seungmin doesn't need to know where you go every thursday afternoon while he's in class, anyways. he never told you why he wanted you to stop coming here, but you have a hunch. a tall, blonde, stupidly handsome hunch.

"y/n!" soobin greets you warmly, leaning over the counter to get a better look at your face.

"hey, soob." your cheeks warm.

you know that nothing is going on between you and seungmin, but you can't help but feel guilty doing exactly the opposite of what he asked of you. but something's shifted the past few days you've been spending with seungmin, almost as if you're seeing each other in this new light. you push this thought to the back of your head like you always do, telling soobin your order and waiting for felix at your booth.

by the time soobin brings the food to you, your phone rings.

fuck. its seungmin.

"hello?"

"hey, my classes ended a little early today. where are you?"

"oh, uhm im-"

oh my god lie faster.

"yea?" you can hear him huffing, obviously walking around campus, probably looking for you.

"at the library." you spit, looking outside the window, frozen with paranoia. lying to him feels so so wrong.

"its wednesday, y/n. library's closed."

oh my fucking god, lie better.

"i went to meet felix." you finally admit, shrinking into your seat.

you hear seungmin sigh. "is he out already?"

"no," you mumble.

"so you're alone?"

you hum.

"im on my way."

he hangs up, and you let out a sigh.

finally, felix barges out from the kitchens and quickly clocks out, throwing his apron over his head and hanging it on the hook by the door. he smiles when he sees you, nearly leaping over the counter to get to you.

"hello, my dear y/n." felix hums, kissing you quickly on the cheek and settling on the booth opposite from you.

"hello, my dear lixie." you hum, pushing a plate of waffles in front of him. "for you, your usual."

felix groans with hunger, fixing his plate with a heavy load of syrup and a huge dollop of butter. "so, how are things? any important new updates this week?"

you shrug, taking a sip of your iced coffee. "nothing new, really..... except, i guess...."

felix hums, urging you to continue.

you let out a deep breath, shaking your head. "i think... i think something's going on between seungmin and i."

you bite the inside of your cheek at felix's reaction, mouth agape as he stares blankly at you. it takes him a moment to process before he finally swallows the food in his mouth and he lets out an evil giggle. "oh, this is... oh, hyunjin owes me so much money!"

"you prick!" you gasp, swatting at felix's arm. "you guys bet on us?"

"well, i mean, come on! it was sooo obvious, i mean, it was only a matter of time, you know?" felix shrugs, cutting up another piece of his waffle.

"no, i do not know!" you squeal, piercing the piece with your fork and stuffing it into your mouth, ignoring your friend's whines of protest. "you guys thought seungmin and i would end up together?"

"well yea, everyone with eyes thought so! come on, y/n. he's looked at you like a lovesick puppy since highschool." felix rolls his eyes. "you guys were always together, and he knew you better than all of us combined. not to mention how lifeless you both were the two years you werent talking. i mean seriously, it was like hanging out with a couple of zombies."

your cheeks warm. "but- im still not even sure of how he feels about me."

"wow. love does make you oblivious as fuck, or whatever they say." felix shakes his head, chugging down his vanilla milkshake before he suddenly remembers something.

"does that mean you're gonna let him help you grade the papers for extra credit?"

you freeze. "what?"

"yea, seungmin said he needs to convince you or else he'd fail, or something. you guys talked about it already, or?"

your breath falters, and your brows furrow. "seungmin's failing a class?"

felix swallows. he cant shake off the feeling that he said something he shouldnt have. but he could never keep a secret from you.

"well- yes. his prof said he needed to convince you to help him get extra credit."

"wait, when was this?" you ask, voice stern.

oh, felix is soooo in deep shit. "uhm, like the day you guys started talking again."

your heart drops to your ass. surely, thats not the whole reason why he was so desperate to talk to you again, right? but you cant shake away the feeling, remembering back to highschool when he'd done almost the exact same thing.

but he promised. he promised it'd be different this time, right?

"seungmin told you that he needed to convince me to let him grade some papers?" you clarify.

"yea."

"and what did you say?"

"i uhm- i told him to like, turn on his charm or something along those lines."

you scoff in disbelief.

felix is going to hell. "but, that was my advice before i knew it was you! i just... i know seungmin needed some help and he'd do anything to get a good grade so i figured he was extra desperate because he was borderline failing and i was just so shocked and-"

"felix, just stop talking." you mumble, leaning back against the booth.

felix only nods, wringing his hands in nervousness. he opens his mouth to speak, but you shoot him a glare. he falls silent again, nervously gnawing on his bottom lip.

your mind's racing, going 100 miles an hour as you go through every moment youve had with seungmin this past month. obviously, this favor is not the only reason he tried hard to convince you to talk to him again, right?

but theres a small voice inside of you, the one who remembers the harsh pain seungmin caused that's screaming, telling you to cut him off, shut him out before he can hurt you all over again.

by the time seungmin pulls open the glass door, you've made up your mind.

"he-"

"this is the last time i let you break my heart, kim seungmin." you say firmly, brushing past him.

seungmin can only stand, frozen. his heart drops to his stomach, head going fuzzy as his gaze lands on felix. he opens his mouth to say something, but he cant find the words.

"what did you say?" seungmin asks.

"im sorry, i didnt know, i thought-"

seungmin's rushing out, throwing the door wide open as he runs out into the street. he can feel his heart pumping as he pushes through crowds of people, racing towards you. he can hear his blood rushing, catching sight of your yellow sundress as you're pushing open your apartment building. seungmin's never been a runner, hell, he nearly failed PE in highschool when he was forced to run laps a whole semester. but right now? he feels like the fucking flash.

he yells for you, ignoring the stitch in his side as he manages to somewhat catch up to you. by the time he throws open the heavy metal door to your apartment complex, the elevator doors are closing, your eyes locking with his.

"fuck." seungmin heaves, bending down to rest his hands on his knees. he needs to reach you before you lock him out of your room. he knows how stubborn you can be, you could probably ignore his pleas and incessant knocking for days if you had to.

seungmin gags, shaking his limbs before he bolts up the stairs, taking two steps at a time, pushing his legs to work faster. the backpack on his shoulders is heavy but he could care less. he cant risk losing you again.

sweat flows freely from his forehead by the time he reaches your floor, and by some miracle, he catches you walking down the hall.

"y/n!" he heaves, sliding his bag off his shoulders and leaving it right there in the hall. "please-"

"go away, seungmin." your voice cracks, digging for your keys in your bag.

he shakes his head, jogging up to you before you can close the door in his face. he sticks his shoe in the closing gap, groaning when it gets stuck between your door and the frame.

"what the fuck?" you yell, backing up as seungmin forces his way into your apartment, closing the door behind him.

"no you- you have to hear me out." he's panting, vision going blurry. jesus christ, he was out of shape.

"you want to talk about it?" you challenge, shrugging your coat off and throwing it on the floor.

"yes." he heaves, leaning against the wall.

"okay, lets talk about it. is it true that you wanted to convince me to help you get extra credit?" your hands are crossed in front of you. seungmin's admittedly a little scared.

"yes, but-"

"but what? i wasnt supposed to find out?"

"no! that was before-"

"before what?" you take a step closer, crowding him in.

"before i realized i was in love with you!" seungmin yells, hiding his face in his hands.

you're silent, expression stoic. "you're sick." you whisper, unsure of yourself. your heart is racing, and you take a step back. "dont... dont say that."

"but its the truth!" seungmin's desperate know, tears welling in his eyes. it wasnt supposed to happen like this. he was supposed to take you out, confess his feelings for you properly, but now its all ruined and rushed and- oh, when he gets his hands on lee felix-

"the truth?" you scoff, shaking your head at him. "how am i supposed to believe you? with everything that... that's happened?"

"you're going to have to trust me." seungmin steps forward, hesitant. he can see the doubt in your eyes and it makes him sick. he'd run up 10 flights of stairs if it meant you'd never look at him like that again.

"trust me when i say that i was a fucking fool in highschool for hurting you, and i spend every day thinking about how if i could, i would go back in time to change everything." he takes another step forward, backing you against the door to your bedroom.

"that i wasted two and a half years of my life by not spending them with you, knowing that you were so near me, that i could easily walk up to you but i was too embarrassed, too scared you'd shut me out." seungmin's baring his soul out, but its too late to stop.

"that i thought about you every single day, thought about what could have been if i wasnt so stupid. that ive spent the last few months doing everything i can to prove to you that i would never ever hurt you like that ever again. but with you im just so stupid, i feel like im always doing the wrong things because youre all up in my head taking up all the space and i fucking love that i cant think about anything but you."

you can only stare up at him. you can see the way his gaze flickers away from you, too nervous to maintain eye contact. he reaches out to you, fingers hesitantly brushing against the back of your hand. testing. you pull away from his touch to wipe away the tear that's managed to slip away, clearing your throat. he tilts his head, hands settling firmly on your waist.

"i love you, y/n. please, you have to believe me."

he's waiting for you to say something, anything. he's never poured his heart out like that before, the silence eating away at him as he slowly spirals, overthinking every word he's said.

but then you relax in his hold, pressing your chest subtly against his. and he knows there's hope.

"are you really failing a class?" you whisper, and seungmin can only laugh.

"that's your concern?" he leans down, dragging the tip of his nose against your cheek. he inhales deeply, nuzzling against you.

"well, yes." you gently push him away by the shoulder, looking up at him. "i cant have my boyfriend failing any of his classes."

seungmin smiles, absolutely melting when you wrap your arms around his neck. "oh yea? does that mean you'll let me in on the extra credit?"

"you are on thin, thin ice, seungmin." you warn, reaching up to finally press your lips against his. seungmin absolutely melts, letting out a low groan at your taste. one hand on your waist, seungmin leans into you, reaching behind you to open your bedroom door. you gasp when you lose balance, recovering quickly when seungmin walks you backwards, never once pulling away from you until the back of your knees hit your bed.

you let out a squeal when you fall back, seungmin expertly finding his way in between your legs. "tell me you want me," seungmin commands in between kisses, hands roaming up and down your sides.

"i do. i want you." you breathe, pushing off seungmin's jacket.

"yea?" seungmin hums, pulling back to bunch up your dress until it sits just below your ribcage. he leans back, simply staring down at you with stars in his eyes.

"stop staring at me." you mumble shyly, turning your head to the side.

"dont want to," seungmin hums, quickly throwing his shirt off into a random corner of your room. "ill look at my girl as long as i like." he leans down, capturing your lips with his.

"your girl, hmm?" you hum, smiling as he kisses his way up your stomach, fingers gripping onto the hem of your dress. your breath hitches when his fingers brush against your under boob. he smiles against your skin, looking up at you.

"aren't- arent you going to take my dress off?" you whisper into the air, and seungmin stops his teasing kisses against your hip.

"well, i was going to but then.." he kisses over the fabric, planting a wet kiss in between your breasts before latching onto your neck for a playful bite. "then i thought about how i want to fuck you in it and then take you out to dinner after."

your cheeks grow red, lightly slapping his arm at his vulgarity. "doesnt that sound better, baby?" seungmin hums, playing with the hem of your underwear.

your breath goes shaky as seungmin continues to toy with you, pads of his fingers lightly pressing against your clit from over your underwear, providing the littlest bit of friction, but enough to drive you crazy.

"seungmin, please-"

"please, what?" he teases, hips pressing into your thigh. you can feel him through his sweats, hard and aching against you. he begins to grind against you, gentle enough to tease you and get him off at the same time.

"need you to touch me." you huff, frustrated.

"i am, baby." seungmin chuckles, pads of his fingers pressing against you firmly, trailing down until he teases your entrance, soiling the fabric of your underwear with how wet you are.

"you know what i mean," you whine.

seungmin only hums, lowering his sweats just enough to free his cock. he pulls your underwear to the side, exposing your cunt to the cold air of the room, making you shiver.

"you're so wet, baby. bet i could slide right in, huh?" seungmin teases you with his tip, tapping it firmly against your clit and trailing down to coat himself in you.

"god, just put it in, minnie." you sigh, grabbing at his shoulders.

"minnie?" seungmin smirks, nosing against your jaw. "i like that."

he finally presses in, slowly making sure you feel every inch of him. you wince a bit at the pain, and seungmin notices with a coo. he pulls your hands away from his shoulders to hold against your bed, fingers intertwining with yours.

"i'm sorry, does it hurt?" he coos, slowly pulling out to thrust back in.

"a little, its okay. kiss me."

seungmin obeys, leaning down to kiss you sweetly as he starts at an even pace. he's slow with it, stroking so deep you can feel him in your throat. it feels intimate this way, with his hands in yours, his chest pressed firmly against you. he pants into your mouth, kissing you when you start to moan too loudly.

"tell me you love me." seungmin sighs, resting his forehead against yours.

you nod, "i love you. love you minnie."

seungmin lets out a groan at that, pulling one hand away to sneak in between your bodies, tips of his fingers finding your clit. he starts to move them in circles, your high fast approaching.

"i'm gonna cum," you whine, squeezing his hand.

"cum with me, baby. please," he begs, holding you so tight against him you feel the air knocked out of you with every thrust. you cum with a whine of his name, fingers digging into the back of his hand. his hips stutter before he presses as deep as he can into you, groaning loudly as he mouths at your neck.

you're both sweaty and sticky, but seungmin pays no mind as he collapses completely on top of you, wrapping his limbs around you. he looks up at you when his breathing starts to even, a cheeky grin on his face.

"what," you laugh, pushing him away by the shoulder when he leans in to kiss you.

he loves the sound of your happiness, basking in it as he shifts closer to pull you into his side. you happily comply, ignoring the mess in between your legs in favor of cuddling up to your lover.

"i really do love you." seungmin reassures, and you roll your eyes.

"i love you too. really." you hum, kissing his shoulder. "now clean me up, and dont even think about falling asleep."

seungmin groans, rolling off your bed to reach for a towel to wet. "but we have plenty of time before dinner. we can nap!"

"no, i will nap." seungmin frowns, walking into your bathroom and turning the faucet on.

"and what do you expect me to do?" seungmin says once he returns to the room, eyebrows raised.

"you, will check all the papers left in my bag." seungmin only laughs, leaning down to wipe in between your thighs, careful to get every drop.

"then can we get dinner?" he asks, pout on his lips.

"yes. your treat."

"well, duh."

as you close your eyes and start to drift off to sleep, seungmin only watches, hunched over on your bedroom floor, hundreds of papers scattered in front of him. he prays he'll be able to get it together and pry his eyes away from you to actually get some work done.

he seriously doubts it.

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