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Better || Five

better || five

summary: you’re sick and tired of playing games, so you tell jimin how you really feel. is the friendship with your best friend now ruined?

word count: 2,280 (i’m so sorry)

genre: bestfriend!jimin, college!au, bestfriends to lovers!au - fluff/angst

one || two || three || four || five

“Happy birthday,” Jimin whispered into your ear, pulling you closer to him as the two of you lay in bed, still a little hangover from last night’s party. He kissed the back of your head, secretly resting his face on your hair. “What do you want to do today?”

Groaning, you opened your eyes, trying to adjust to the sunlight, coming from the windows. “I’m studying all day for my midterm that’s on Monday.”

“You cannot be serious, right? Or are you actually the biggest dork ever?” he teased, making you laugh. “It’s Saturday though. You can study tomorrow all day and celebrate today, Dude.”

“This exam is worth over forty percent of my grade, Dude,” you mocked using the same tone he did. “I haven’t even looked at the study guide yet, and I really am trying to pass the class with an A.”

“But it’s your birthday,” he argued.

Ever since living with Taehyung, you and Jimin usually shared a birthday celebration, but coming to college, you had grown out of celebrating your birthday, so Taehyung would just throw a party for Jimin only and then invited your closest friends to a simple, birthday dinner, ordering cheesecake for dessert the next night.

“And I don’t want anything, especially, when we celebrated your birthday last night.”

“Come on, we should do something,” he whined, still wanting to celebrate your birthday. “Besides, didn’t we also agree to go to Joshua’s party tonight?”

“We?” Turning your head, you raised your eyebrows as you looked at him, correcting him. “I’m pretty sure I said no while you drunkenly promised him that you would be there.”

“I can’t go without my partner in crime,” he said. “Come on, if we go, we get to celebrate for free at Joshua’s.”

Before you could say anything, Jimin’s phone started to ring. With his right arm around you, he searched around and moved his left arm all around, trying to find his phone on the bed, but he eventually let go and sat up once he realized his phone was on the nightstand to his right.

“Why didn’t you answer?” You sat up as well, watching Jimin as he turned the sound off on his phone and put it facing down on the nightstand. “Who was it?”

He shrugged, looking away from his phone to look at you. “It was just my alarm.”

“Wait, your alarm sound is the same sound as your ringtone?”

“It’s supposed to help me wake up faster if I think someone is actually calling me,” he explained, making a good, reasonable point. “But it just makes me hate my ringtone now.”

“Weird.”

He rolled his eyes and changed the subject. “How do I change your mind for tonight?”

“If I can recite my whole study guide to you by 7, we can go.”

“Challenge accepted.” And that’s when Jimin rushed out of bed, opened his dresser, tossing a bunch of clothes onto the ground. Eventually, he tossed a pair of grey sweats onto the bed where you were at and started to change right in front of you.

“Dude?”

“Get dressed,” he instructed.

As you got ready, he went to the kitchen and started the stove, putting an black frying pan on the stove top. He waited for a couple minutes before putting bread onto the pan, trying to make some French Toast.

You sat down at the island, eating the breakfast he prepared as he took a seat next to you, putting his laptop between the two of you. He opened your university’s site, putting all your information in.

“Wait, how do you know my password?”

“Your password is still the same from when I first met you,” he explained, typing away to pull up your study guide. “Why is it still ‘Seoul1411?’”

“Should I just tell you my bank account, so you could just remember and I don’t have to?” You joked.

After you finished eating, you looked through your electronic book online, looking at the parts you needed to study as Jimin started writing on vocabulary terms and definitions on flashcards. He monitored your breaks, taking your phone away and making sure you weren’t distracted from anything. He even took the time to cook more meals.

As you studied, you couldn’t help to notice that Jimin stole glances to at his phone, as if he was waiting it to ring. But if that were the case, he always made sure to decline their call before you could see it ring. Though, there was one time you saw it ring. “Who is it?”

He declined the call and put it faced down on the table. “Those spam dealership callers.”

“Why don’t you block them?” He shrugged, changing the subject by asking you a question from your study guide.

By the time the clock hit seven, Jimin could have taken your test for you and pass with flying colors even though the subject was completely different from his major classes. His brain felt fuzzy from all the studying he did, but he knew how much it meant to you to do this. “How are you feeling for your exam?”

“I think I can do well.” He nodded excitedly. “Let’s just not go too crazy tonight, because I still want to study, starting tomorrow morning.”

“And I will help you,” he promised. “Go home and get ready for tonight, and I’ll meet you at Joshua’s.”

______

“You know the designated drivers aren’t supposed to drink anything at all, right? That’s usually how it works,” you said as you watched Taehyung eye the alcohol on Joshua’s island counter. “Or at least so I think.”

“Ha, ha, so funny,” he deadpanned, rolling his eyes. “I’m surprised to see you here and drinking when I heard you just wanted to study the whole day.”

Shortly after Taehyung and Jimin arrived together, they were pulled aside and cornered by Joshua and his friends to play beer pong, but only Jimin went as he won against Taehyung in rock, paper, scissors on who would be the sober one tonight. Your cousin then found you in the kitchen by yourself.

You shrugged. “I guess I’m surprised too.”

“Did you actually study today, or did more happened?” You playfully pushed him your cousin away. “What?”

“We just studied because nothing is going on between us,” you gritted through your teeth. “We’re just friends. Nothing more, nothing less.”

“Look, Cousin, the last time you said that was literally last night, and you drank so much that I got drunk just from looking at you.” He took a quick look in the direction where Jimin was at, laughing with his friends and then preceded to look back at you. “Whatever is going on between the two of you is your business, but you need to tell him your boundaries or establish what you guys are. Otherwise you’re just going to get hurt or disrespected.”

“And I think that’s my cue for another drink.” You started to pour whatever was in front of you into a red cup, thinking about Taehyung’s words. You knew it was true and that he meant well, but his warning hurt more than you thought it would.

By your fifth cup, Jimin made his way towards you. He smiled, holding back his laugh as you looked at him with your drunken eyes. “Sunshine, are you okay?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” You slurred your words.

“Let’s take a walk to sober up.”

_____

It’s like deja vu from yesterday, but this time the both of you are walking around Joshua’s neighbor with Taehyung a few paces behind. He doesn’t the two most important people in his life be drunk and missing if he left the two of you alone on the street.

“Looks like you’re having fun today,” Jimin teased, content with the smile on your face.

“I’m glad we came out today.” It’s been over ten minutes outside, and the cold night definitely woke you out of your state. “I want to dance later.”

“We can do that together.”

Before you could say anything, his phone rang. He took it out of his pocket, and the smile on your face disappeared when you looked at Jimin’s phone screen. All day, you’ve been so blind that you didn’t realize your best friend was lying to you; it wasn’t an automatic machine spamming his phone, it was Jessica. As he stared down at her contact picture, deciding on what to do, you stared at him. In a low voice, you asked, “Why is she calling you?”

Still letting the phone ring, he sighed, refusing to look at you. “We’re in the process of maybe getting back together.”

“What?”

“I need to talk to her and figure all of this out.” Letting go of his hand, all the color in his face left. Jimin tried holding your hand again, but you flinched and took a step back. “Y/N, what’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong?! Are you kidding me?!” You cried, tears streaming down your face. “You’re going back to her!”

Taehyung was right. You should have reemphasize that everything between you was strictly platonic, that there was nothing there, right there and then at the wedding dress shop. This wouldn’t happen if you had done that.

“No, no! That’s not it,” he denied, putting his hands on the side of your arms. The two of you were staring at each other, face to face. “I just need to make things right. I’m going to talk to her now.”

In a small voice, you asked, “And what about me?”

“What do you mean?” He raised his eyebrows, not understanding what you were asking. “What about you?”

You remember the night Tiffany asked you that if there ever came a day where you liked Jimin what would you do. It’s silly to think that you thought you could live with the pain and live next to his side as if nothing was there. You had to know the truth; you couldn’t stay in this seesaw game, not knowing if he truly wanted you. “Do you even care about me?”

“Of course I care about you!” He said with no hesitation. “How could I not care about you, Y/N?”

And deep down, you knew Jimin would do anything for you. If you wanted him to get you a drink from a coffee shop before work, he would get it. If you wanted concert tickets to a sold out show, he’ll find a way to get you those tickets. If he could, he would give you the moon. Of course he fucking cared about you. But what did it exactly mean? How could he treat you like this and then pick someone else to do it with as well?

Now knowing what his lips taste like, you don’t think you could ever share Jimin ever again. “I can’t do this anymore, Jimin.”

He took a gulp. “Do what?”

“You say you don’t want to kiss me, then do. You tell me I mean the world and act like you’re my boyfriend, but then you act like nothing happened between us, like, I am nothing to you,” you said slowly, processing whatever that was coming out of your mouth. “I am nothing to you.”

“Please, baby, I’ll explain everything tomorrow.”

“Don’t call me that!” You think back to Taehyung’s words, how you were being disrespected. “You’re going back to her! It’s clear that I love you, but you used me to try to get over her. You just wanted someone under you.”

“That’s not it! You’re not thinking clearly.” He took his hands off your arms and shook his head. “You’re drunk.”

“I’m not drunk!” You screamed at him, taken back by your own voice. It’s been awhile since you last screamed at your best friend, but it was never like this. “I can’t do this anymore.”

“You can’t do what anymore? Us? Our friendship? You’re giving it all up?”

“I can’t keep my feelings bottled up and be your little secret. One minute you want me and the next you don’t.”

“Of course I want you. You’re my best friend.”

“I can’t be best friends with someone who doesn’t love me back. I can’t. Not anymore.”

“Please don’t do this, Y/N.”

“The thing is, I’m not doing anything,” you sobbed. “Jimin, you’re the only one who makes me happy when I feel like absolute crap. You know how to cheer me up and make me laugh. There isn’t a day I don’t think about you and how you make my life better.”

He doesn’t say anything.

All he had to do was to tell you that he feels the same way, that no one else compares to you, that your existence was the only thing he needed in this world. He knew what you wanted, and he knew you deserved it, yet he gave you an answer; because no answer is an answer.

How ironic that silence is the loudest thing you can hear.

Shaking your head, you took a step back, but end up tripping on your own feet. You expected to hit the ground, but your cousin is there to catch you. “I’m taking her home first and getting you then. We’re not doing this in front of a light pole at 2 in the morning.”

With your arm wrapped around Taehyung, the two of you walked over to his car, parked to the curb. It wasn’t until after opening the passenger door, Jimin finally broke the silence. “You know that I love you, Y/N.”

His heart broke when you look at him with tears flooding your eyes. “Yeah, just not like that.”

Better || Five

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