Jesslou21 - Random Witchiness - Tumblr Blog

Lookf at these buges…

I think everyone needs to see them

rare vent art from a few months ago

one thing about me is i frickin love long ass youtube videos about the most random and niche topics imaginable. defunctland's investigation into who created the disney channel theme song? oh i was seated. a two hour breakdown on the lore of the entire tekken video game franchise? sign me up. a vlog about a cross-country roadtrip dining at every single rainforest cafe in the united states? i'm there.

Stages of having a short (gay) haircut! 

me, as i force a dollar bill into the self-checkout machine: thats right…..good boy……vore president washington

Fun family story: when my aunt was marrying her wife everyone was really excited but also dreading it because my aunt is known for her insanely long speeches so everyone knew her vows would be like 9 hours long so when it came time for her to say her vows she had a shit ton of cue cards in her hands and even her wife started groaning and my aunt took a deep inhale and then unravelled all the cue cards which were taped together and they all just read ‘HOT DAMN’ in giant letters and those were my aunts vows.

@neil-gaiman did that actually happen to you? Pretty funny nevertheless

heey im a lil sad would anyone distract me with whatever

peeling those sour rainbow gummy strips into long thin strings and putting them into cheap energy drink to create something im calling battery acid spaghetti will update once ive finished it

Please don’t tag any expecting mothers

Important image for all your wizard memeing needs

Scaramouche: Hey, you want a tarot reading?

Heizou: Those are Pokemon cards.

Scaramouche: You got a magikarp.

Heizou: ...

Scaramouche: It means 'fuck you'.

Scaramouche: Kazuha told me that brown is just navy orange, and I have never been more disappointed with something I agree with.

FUCK. honestly just FUCK. We missed a very important day yesterday.

sometimes im like “tone down the Self to fit in” and other times, the voice of God comes to me in a dream and says “I didn’t make you crazy for no reason”

i appreciate the content warnings and understand their importance but i can’t help but giggle a little bit when i click on a fnaf fic and half the chapters have child death warnings in their notes. sir this is the Child Death Game i think i know what i’m signing up for

I will pay good money to actually read an fic about Teyvat writer's author notes

This thread omg

My local movie theater thinks they’re hilarious

ik how reviving looks in a game but imagine irl if you died in battle and then wake up 5 minutes later to your healer mage going "chop chop let's go you're not done here! finish killing that guy" like thanks for unbreaking my bones but jeez

ITS APRIL 13 YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

FETCH ME NEIL