I Want To Be Loved Softly.

i want to be loved softly.

a love that wraps around me like a warm blanket on a rainy day. a love that’s warm sunshine on your face. a love that knows you better than yourself.

five recipes for an exciting life (in my opinion)

spending enough time creating things with your hands (baking, drawing, scrapbooking, doodling, crocheting, journaling and so on)

keeping track of things like pretty skies, milestones, happy memories, appointments you're looking forward to

listening to music that genuinely makes you feel happy and energetic

making a habit of reaching out to people in a way that's comfortable to you (i send my dad songs he might like, my friend sends me monthly life updates)

being kind to all your five senses → like investing in a scented candle or essential oil dispenser or body mist, having a soft blanket or socks (or a soft animal to pet), listening to birdsong or the rain, looking at the sky more often, and having your favorite foods enough times

x - x / x - x

Bae Seok Ryu and Song Hyeon Jun

Truthfully, the circumstances just weren’t in their favor, regardless of how much they loved each other and dreamed of a future together. They were faced with a huge obstacle in the form of stomach cancer, for which Hyeon Jun fully committed to being Seok ryu's caretaker, taking a sick leave from work and even putting his whole life on hold for Seok Ryu, because he loved her and wanted to be there by her side. However, Seok ryu's decision to not tell her family and close friends meant leaving Hyeon Jun- who respected her decision and even after they broke up, kept her illness hidden from her family- as her sole caretaker and support system, which was bound to take a toll on him as well sooner or later.

After her treatment ended, they were yet faced with another huge blow in the form of depression -none of which are Seok ryu's fault by the way. But once again Hyeon Jun was left as her sole source of support. Now, I'm not saying that one's partner isn't supposed to be there (I mean, "in sickness and in health", right?), but it's clear that it was too much for him at this point. This reminded me of a cancer research conference I attended years ago, where one of the discussed topics was caretaker burnout and the importance of respite for them, both the sick person and those around them are greatly affected both physically and mentally, and that's what we saw in the episode; Two exhausted people who, despite loving each other, just couldn't bear with how exhausted they were and Hyeon Jun ended up snapping. Does this mean he's a shitty person? No, we saw him be by Seok ryu's side through thick and thin, but at last he was tired and snapped in a moment of desperation. This sadly just means they just weren't what the other needed at the moment anymore, and this is a very realistic portrayal of relationships where there isn't respite nor a proper support system.

I do think he loves her and feels guilty for being so burnt out, but sadly she's ready to move on and that's all that's left for him to do now. Move on.

This sets up a huge challenge for Seung hyo tho, how do you get through her walls when she’s seen first hand what can happen to a relationship when faced with adversities? She said it herself, she’ll be constantly on the lookout for her cancer possibly coming back or even spreading. How can he convince her that he won’t burn out? How can you convince someone who knows firsthand that sometimes love is not enough? Good luck Charlie!

tujhe dekha toh yeh jaana sanam