Derek Overfield

Derek Overfield

Matthew Arnold, Philomela

I crave intimacy as much as I’m afraid of it.

my favorite trope is when someone believes they’re hard to love and someone who loves them like it’s breathing.

you cannot love me back to life. but if you stay, i will love you to the end of yours.

i hurt the ones i love, but i hurt me more. it is a kind of reconciliation. only i do not stick around long enough for them to hear it. i run away when people try to love me. it is not that i do not love them. it is not even that i do not want to be loved. i have just seen enough wreckage in my life to know that i don't want to cause it anymore. i lived in a haunted house until i became a haunted house. i wanted to believe that i could be something beautiful someday. so i cut my hair & painted the walls & smiled & put up pretty pictures. but the only people that live here are ghosts. and i want your heart to keep beating. you cannot love me back to life. but if you stay, i will love you to the end of yours.

endings are never pretty, but they are still mine to hold - parrish h.

“I'm not used to being loved. I wouldn't know what to do.”

— F. Scott Fitzgerald, More Than Just A House