Yes I'm A Tumblr Funnyman But Have I Mentioned That I'm Like Really Fuckin Dumb. Also Should I Do A Face

Yes I'm a Tumblr funnyman but have I mentioned that I'm like really fuckin dumb. Also should I do a face reveal to feed my ego?? What do y'all think I look like? Do you think I look like a cave troll? A reddit man? Sorry but I'm actually Remy from Ratatouille. Sorry but I'm actually Ben Shapiro. Sorry but I'm actually Dirk Strider from Homestuck but only after he goes ultimate. Sorry I'm actually Garfield. Sorry but actually a 98 year old man, my name is actually Harrison and I'm in hospice and have had cancer two separate times. Sorry but I'm actually Bibble from that one Barbie movie.

I care about three whole bards:

1) Jaskier, fuckin obviously, I have countless posts about him because y'all are sluts for him and I CANNOT BLAME YOU

2) Gamzee Makara, but only kinda bc deadass Gamzee could snap my thicc ass like a twig and that scares me and I don't like it

3) My fucking DND character, Marchuan, I really like them a lot

ON ANOTHER NOTE I THINK I CAN FEEL THE WORLD ROTATING RN AND I'M A GOOD KID SO I'M NOT HIGH MY BODY IS JUST GOING AAAAAAAAA y'know? Yeah, you know.

I'm not a main character, I'm not even in the movie. I'm the old white man selling crack by the convenience store that they had to ask to move so that they could film.

Hollup let me literally go eat an entire *insert large item of food* I'm so Fucking hungy

I FIXED MY FAVORITE MUG!!!

I just broke vmy favorite mug I'm very emotionally fragile and I'm going to cry.... It was shaped like a lamma and incredibly hard to drink from but it held my markers so well!!!

What do I do? I look at pictures of myself in cosplay and feel gender euphoria :]

Please I just wish to be the edgy pretty boy with extreme emotional baggage and a heart of gold