TW: Suicidal Ideation.

TW: suicidal ideation.

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“You shouldn’t need to worry,” you had assured them, holding back the cracks in your voice as a remorseful grin splayed across your lips unwillingly, “I… I’m not essential. Even if I did do it, I’m sure you’d be fine. You’d just realise you never needed me after all.”

I’m sorry to say, but the humour only left a bitter taste in your F/O’s mouth— never because of you, but something in their core boils at the thought. A thousand dreams and futures play in their mind, yet they never find a possibility in which they wouldn’t be devastated at what you had referenced. Living a full life with your time together cut so short? Because you had been fighting yourself for so long and they failed to notice?? Because they failed to help and show you how much they love you???

No, just the thought feels wrong.

They wouldn’t stand for it.

This flashes through their mind in a nanosecond. They won’t treat you like you’re made of glass, yet it’s obvious from the way your F/O wraps their arms around you and lets you rest with them as they gaze sadly at their beloved that you’re their most treasured jewel. They won’t be scared off by the breakdowns or vents or numb days; you’ve chosen them out of trillions of others and still loved them so beautifully. How would their thoughts ever linger on leaving you, especially when they have the chance to show how deep their devotion runs?

Your F/O wouldn’t think twice about holding you on the bad days and reminding you of your limits, wouldn’t hesitate to be your pillar of strength when the world tries to slip hatred under your door, would never despise you for seeking help when you need rest after your lifelong fight. You survived for so long, and your rest is long overdue. You never asked for these scars, but your F/O is determined to embrace and care for each and every one of them.

After all, you’re their hero.

imagine your f/o letting you cry into their shirt, their arms strong and safe around you as they gently brush hair from your face and whisper soft little shh, shh, it's okay. i got yous ♡ imagine them soothingly rubbing your back and cradling you against them for as long as you need

Villain f/os...so so good...they take over the world for you then kiss kiss you goodnight. Tell them somebody hurt you and theyll immediately comfort you and then chase whoever hurt you. Have them be a strong leader or one of the most feared, who kisses you at night and wont let you go while sleeping because clingy and protective...villain f/o's...

"I don't wanna fucking be here anymore. I DON'T WANNA FUCKING BE HERE ANYMORE."

It's all too much. You're drowning, and you can't even give enough of a damn to swim up for air. "What's there even to like about me anyway? Why the hell do they even stay with me?" You can't stop thinking they'd be better off without you. You can't shake the feeling it might be true. It seems so easy. They'll get over it. It'll be so-

Your trance is broken by a soft voice calling your name. Before you can even think of a lie to tell, your crying gets worse. You want to die. You want to die and you keep screaming that over and over. You wouldn't be suprised if they ran, so why are they still here? Why are they comforting you? Why are they being so sweet? Why are they making their life so much harder for your sake? You know they'd disagree with that, but you can't think of any other way to describe this. You know how bad it hurts them to see you in pain.

You cry yourself to sleep eventually, and they place you into bed. They know they can't change your mind overnight. All they can do is keep a very close eye on you and give you tiny reasons to give tomorrow a chance. They want to stay by your side always, they're just gonna need a little help making sure that happens. For now, they hold you tight so you won't disappear.

imagine cooking with your f/o. you're perched on the kitchen counter, a cookbook open in your lap while they're bustling around chopping vegetables and measuring out spices at your instruction ("oh god, did i say 1/2 cup?? i meant 1/4" "eh, it'll probably be fine"). imagine they give you little tastes from the pot when they stir it, insisting you have to try just a tiny bit because i don't know if i put enough salt in, is that good? does it need more? but really their heart squeezes in their chest every time you give a pleased little mm, perfect and look at them with that proud sparkle in your eyes.

imagine they put on music and the kitchen is filled with the warm, savory scent of food and your f/o's singing as they dance from place to place, checking a timer here, turning a stovetop down there, popping leftover bits from the cutting board into their mouth. you remind them before they can burn whatever's in the oven; they throw a "what would i do without you?" over their shoulder, laughing. it's safe here, a golden bubble of warmth for just the two of you to rest in. they nudge you to put just a little more in your bowl— you had a long day, surely you're hungry? they want their love to be well fed ♡ definitely not because they're itching to watch you eat their cooking and see you sated and happy and half falling asleep on their shoulder, no sir

advice: imagine you info dumping to your f/o. do it. imagine them smiling as they listen to you ramble and the questions they'd ask to get you to keep going. imagine them telling you that they love when you go on like this because they just love your passion. even if its something they don't *really* understand or have any stake in. you're just so enthusiastic! how can they not love you when you do that?