High-functioning Anxiety Sounds Like

High-functioning anxiety sounds like…

You’re not good enough. You’re a bad friend. You’re not good at your job. You’re wasting time. You’re a waste of time. Your boyfriend doesn’t love you. You’re so needy. What are you doing with yourself? Why would you say that? What if they hate it? Why can’t you have your shit together? You’re going to get anxious and because you’re going to get anxious, you’re going to mess everything up. You’re a fraud. Just good at faking it. You’re letting everybody down. No one here likes you.

All the while, it appears perfectly calm.

It’s always looking for the next outlet, something to channel the never-ending energy. Writing. Running. List-making. Mindless tasks (whatever keeps you busy). Doing jumping jacks in the kitchen. Dancing in the living room, pretending it’s for fun, when really it’s a choreographed routine of desperation, trying to tire out the thoughts stuck in your head.

Funguise Figurines / Brooches

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Three years ago today. I love this bit of video. Not sure why.

I do not have to make myself smaller in order to be loved.

I do not have to make myself smaller in order to be valued.

I do not have to make myself smaller in order to love myself.

I do not have to make myself smaller for other people’s comfort.

I do not have to make myself smaller.

I think I'd be happier dead, but I'd actually be nothing at all. Nothing sounds nice.