Jokes That Will Literally Never Not Be Funny To Me:

jokes that will literally never not be funny to me:

saying “speedrun strats” every time you fuck up

saying “first try” when you’ve tried the thing like 15 times, minimum

Hey guys, I'm at the out of bounds pizza stand, y'all want anything?

Can people shut up abt the whole “umm splatoon is abt letting go of the past and how that negatively affects things” NO!!!!! SPLATOON IS NOT JUST ABOUT THE NEGATIVE ASPECTS OF THE PAST. SPLATOON CELEBRATES THE PAST. ITS ABOUT HOW THE PAST AFFECTS THE FUTURE BOTH POSITIVE AND!!!!! NEGATIVE!. Octavio grizz and tartar did let the past drive their actions for the worse! But also splatoon has plenty of wonderful things cause in chain reaction. The squid sisters covered an OLD FOLK LORE SONG, which launched their careers, led octolings out of the domes, caused off the hook to form, whom went on to help agent 8! Or what about humanities hopes and desires being passed down to the inklings from the past!!!!!!! Splatoon is a celebration of all things, past present and future!!!!!! Its an ever changing world that grows!!!! Whatever happy fun playtime forever 😁 okay?

End-of-Splatoon thoughts.

Thinking about how since the very start, Splatoon has had a feature where players can draw and post artwork and spot them as graffiti on walls or billboards. Or how the weapons have always been paint brushes and rollers and ballpoint pens. Since its inception, Splatoon has been dedicated to engaging its players with the act of creation and creative expression, showing them how their art can build communities and (literally) change the world.

Thinking about finding human-made music discs buried underground for thousands of years, and a grand finale music festival. About those human handprints etched into concrete in Alterna. Did those human artists know it would end like this? First a fiery death and then, eventually, a worldwide celebration of music to represent our shared past, present, and future. Did they know that their songs, insignificant in the face of extinction, would one day become the solution that will save the next dominant life-form from the same fate?

Thinking about how eerily similar the Octarian domes are to Alterna. About how close Inklings and Octolings were to repeating the same mistakes as humans. But their doomed fates were undone not by some miracle technology or military power or a rocket, but by music.

Thinking about how humans wiped themselves out with war, and our parting gifts were liquid crystals that somehow paired with the DNA of primeval inklings and somehow infused them with our memories and culture and a Song. And 12,000 years in the future, that same Song will end a war.

Thinking about how art and music and punk culture and rock & roll and friendly competition and petty arguments and water guns aren’t uniquely human concepts, but the fundamental qualities of intelligent life. An inheritable spirit that can cross evolutionary bounds.

Thinking about the theme of Splatoon, that art and music and fun will not die with the human race. That every piece of art we create is a seed we sow for future generations to reap. That our legacy is ingrained into the crust of the earth. That long after we’re gone, the oceans will remember, and they’ll pick up where we left off.

Thinking about how Splatoon says that the essence of humanity –– the thing that will outlive us –– isn't war or prejudice or destruction or greed, it's a song.