Also I Finished Reading The Vampire L*stat The Day Before Yesterday, Which Was Some Excellent Timing

also i finished reading the vampire l*stat the day before yesterday, which was some excellent timing on my part if i do say so myself.

🪐 — BLACK SAILS : @anquenin for louis ▶ ❝ am I crazy? tell me. i’m asking. ❞

IT'S A RIDICULOUS QUESTION, & the absurdity of it almost makes louis laugh. almost, but not quite. instead there's only a slight twitch of his brow as they wander like mortals through the city, a slight curve of his lips as he stops to look at the other vampire in the orange streetlight glow. ❝ you're asking me ? ❞ his voice is tight, uncertain of everything — including his own sanity.

but astarion seems to want a real answer, looking to him as if for some kind of reassurance that louis doesn't know if he can provide. palpable tension rolls off of astarion, his thoughts a bleakly fatalistic mirror of louis' own. but after a moment, he shrugs, brushing away the other's concern. ❝ look, man, we're all crazy. all of us. it's our way, our kind. we all lose our minds eventually. ❞ & if astarion hadn't figured that out yet, then he should be prepared for it to happen soon. the price of immortality was insanity; louis had seen the truth of that firsthand. & yet, somehow, he felt as if his mind was sharper, more lucid while walking with a relative stranger than it was with his companion of these last 30-some years. louis found himself in no hurry to return to the suite he shared with armand. & knowing what he did of astarion's maker, it seemed the strange pale vampire felt the same. ❝ but i think keeping the right company helps. at least a little. ❞

&. 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

( dialogue  prompts  taken  from the script of  everything  everywhere  all  at  once  (2022),  directed  by  daniel  kwan  and  daniel  scheinert.  feel  free  to  edit  and  change  as  you  seem  fit. )

❛ you look really pretty right now. ❜

❛ stop changing the subject. ❜

❛ every day i fight, i fight for all of us. ❜

❛ what are you doing? what is wrong? ❜

❛ if i have to think about one more thing today, my head will explode. ❜

❛ you may be in grave danger. there is no time to explain.❜

❛ we can make our own way. please, come with me. ❜

❛ don't even talk to me about this because i won't remember.❜

❛ i am not your husband. at least not the one you know. i am another version of him from another life path, another universe. ❜

❛ i’m here because we need your help.❜

❛ sorry, very busy today. no time to help you– ❜

❛ all those years of searching have brought me here. to this universe. to you. ❜

❛ i’m here to tell you every rejection, every disappointment has led you here. to this moment. ❜

❛ i'm not ready to fight yet. ❜

❛ maybe we don't have a choice. ❜

❛ now, you can either come with me and live up to your ultimate potential, or lie here and live with the consequences. ❜

❛ i... want to lie here. ❜

❛ how often do people literally die laughing? ❜

❛ my husband won't even kill a spider. how are you the same person? ❜

❛ we are talking about infinity. if you can imagine it, somewhere out there, it exists. ❜

❛ how did i die? ❜

❛ i've seen you die a thousand ways. in a thousand worlds. in every single one, you were murdered. ❜

❛ what!? who wants me dead? ❜

❛ you’ve been feeling it too, haven’t you? something is off. your clothes never wear as well the next day, your hair never falls in quite the same way, even your coffee tastes... wrong. ❜

❛ maybe we would have been better off if we had never gotten married. ❜

❛ i never said that. ❜

❛ you didn’t have to. it’s the way you look at me. ❜

❛ can’t you see it? how wonderful it would be if you came with me? ❜

❛ i saw my life without you. i wish you could have seen it. it was beautiful. ❜

❛ shhh, you're not thinking straight. ❜

❛ what is worse than death? ❜

❛ i saw your face on a billboard and — this is silly — i wondered if you remembered me... ❜

❛ is it that i can’t be here, or that i’m not allowed to be here? ❜

❛ there is no good, there is no evil. there is only “goovil”. ❜

❛ if you can imagine it, you have fucked it. ❜

❛ do not be so closed minded that you blind yourself from the truth! ❜

❛ don’t make me fight you. i am really really good. ❜

❛ you're capable of anything because you're so bad at everything. ❜

❛ you can't remember anything because your bodies were under the control of other universes. ❜

❛ you were like puppets. and you could do things you normally can't do. you were like, what's that movie... raccaccoonie? ❜

❛ how can you defeat her in every universe, if you can't even kill her in one? ❜

❛ the sacrifices necessary to win this war... i know all too well. ❜

❛ i cannot lose another loved one to the darkness. ❜

❛ i know you have feelings. feelings that make you so sad. that make you just want to give up. that is not your fault. ❜

❛ i'll see you again soon, somewhere out there in all that noise. ❜

❛ just think happy thoughts. ❜

❛ you okay? caught you staring off into space again. ❜

❛ i'm the one you've been looking for. ❜

❛ i’m the one who will defeat you. ❜

❛ you’re finally free, like me. ❜

❛ you don't have to choose anymore. between loving me or hating me. you can do both at the same time. ❜

❛ before, you were asking about "our daughter". it's crazy, but it really got me thinking. what if you had come with me all of those years ago? ❜

❛ all of this time, i wasn't looking for someone who could defeat me. i was looking for someone who could see what i see, feel what i feel... ❜

❛ oh, good, you're here too. ❜

❛ i'm sorry about ruining everything, i– ❜

❛ we're all stupid. small stupid little humans. it's like our whole deal. ❜

❛ everything is going to be okay. ❜

❛ you think i’m weak don’t you? ❜

❛ when we first fell in love all of those years ago, your father would say i was too sweet for my own good. maybe he was right. ❜

❛ please! can we just stop fighting! ❜

❛ you tell me that it's a cruel world and we're all just running around in circles. i know that. i've been on this earth just as many days as you. ❜

❛ the only thing i do know is we have to be kind. be kind. especially, when we don't know what's going on. ❜

❛ i know you go through life with your fists held tight. you see yourself as a fighter. well, i see myself as one too. this is how i fight. ❜

❛ in another life, i would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you. ❜

❛ you know what i say? cold, hysterical, unlovable bitches like us make the world go round. ❜

❛ you aren’t unlovable. there is always something to love. ❜

❛ even in a stupid, stupid universe where we have hot dogs for fingers, we’d all be very good with our feet! ❜

❛ in a universe where we both agree that no one could love you, if we look hard enough, something will prove us wrong. ❜

❛ we are all useless alone. so its good you're not alone. ❜

❛ maybe you win in this universe. but in another, i beat you. or we tie. or we eat crepes. ❜

❛ i don't want to hurt anymore. and for some reason when i'm with you, it hurts both of us. ❜

❛ out of all of the places i could be, why would i want to be here with you? ❜

❛ i still want to be here with you. i will always want to be here with you. ❜

❛ i will cherish these few specks of time. ❜

You overpaid, with crumpled bills and some earrings with blood on them, like they were ripped from the lobes. You had a body about to bloom and the mind of a sophisticate. You didn't smile.

EVEN THE WAY HE MOVES seems strange somehow. the lestat that stands before him is entirely different than the one in louis' memories, the one that had followed him through the streets of paris & lingered around the penthouse in dubai. this version is smaller, paler — but no less beautiful. after breaking from their long embrace, lestat takes an unsteady step backwards, then another, his touch falling from louis' waist to link their hands instead. & for the first time, louis lets himself follow the pull of the unseen tether between them without any resistance.

the inner room where the coffin sits is just as neglected & ruined as the rest of the house, though at least here boards have reinforced the broken windows to keep the day out. the coffin itself matches its surroundings perfectly, its frame cracked & the velvet within ragged & covered in dark stains. lestat trips as he steps inside, clumsy in a way he never was in louis' memories.

& now, nearly a hundred years after waking to his new life, louis murmurs a soft word of thanks & steps carefully into the coffin beside his maker again, just as he had on that first night. ❝ why didn't you get yourself a new one ? this one must let the sun in with all these cracks. ❞ he asks as he settles, lying back into lestat's arms. but he already knows the answer. he could remember at one point flinging this very coffin over the balcony railing in his anger. but lestat was sentimental & quite attached to it, so they'd had it repaired in lieu of buying a new one. louis had thought it silly, at the time. but now he wonders if it's not too late for the same to be done for the two of them. & he cannot pull his eyes away from his maker's face, a hand softly tucking a fallen lock of golden hair behind lestat's ear before coming to rest against his cheek. perhaps in the past louis would have held his tongue, but this time he allows himself to give voice to what forms in his mind when he looks at him. ❝ i missed you. ❞

'NOT TODAY.' Those two words, so innocently thrown out, stuck him like a knife. Tomorrow, then? Or perhaps the night after that. Regardless, Louis planned to leave him once more, and, loath as he was to do so, Lestat would let him just as he had 77 years earlier. He nodded and managed a half-smile. "Good. Good. Far too dangerous for that... good." The fact that there time together would be short only meant that he must memorize every detail so it may be feasted upon for years to come.

The thrashing of the wind and rain was mere background noise against the resonance of Louis' voice. "Of course, mon cher. Always." He took an unsteady step back as if he intended to backwalk his former companion into the adjoining room. It was only after another step was clumsily taken that Lestat allowed his hands to fall from Louis' waist to his hands. He held the hand of his former companion as if it were made of porcelain and carefully led him into a small room, with boarded windows, and empty save for the coffin placed in its center.

Although, it had braved several cross-continental trips and was nearly half a century old the coffin maintained its regal appearance. The wood remained unblemished, with a polished sheen that reflected even in the worst lighting. It's ornate decoration wrapped around the top as sharp and finely finished as the day it was carved. He opened it with a flourish, revealing that even the fabric had neither aged nor stained.

Lestat carefully stepped in, his grip on Louis' hand tightening as his foot hit against the coffins side causing him to lurch forward. He gave an airy laugh, the excitement of it all having him lightheaded. Once settled he reached out for Louis hand once more, "still wish to be on top, beautiful one?"

🪐 — COWBOY CARTER : @immobiliter ( daniel ) for louis ▶ ❝ let me make myself clear. ❞

THIS WASN'T HOW the interview was supposed to go. there had been a plan in place — call the boy ( who was no longer a boy ) out to dubai for a second attempt, & do it right this time. make sure that he told only the story that louis wanted told. that was what he & armand had discussed ; it was why they had together carefully curated which materials daniel would have access to & which he wouldn't. it was one of the conditions of louis doing this at all. but now daniel wasn't following the script, & the timeline had begun to splinter & break wherever he touched it.

❝ you don't make things clear. you never make things clear. in fact, you seem to revel in doing the exact opposite. ❞ his voice was harsh, & even he could hear how petulant it sounded, like a child caught in a lie. but wasn't this what louis had wanted : to remember ? wasn't this why he had needed daniel instead of someone younger, someone new, to write his story ? ❝ i don't know, ok ? so stop asking. why does it matter if it was raining or not ? ❞