I Cannot Make You Understand. I Cannot Make Anyone Understand What Is Happening Inside Me. I Cannot Even

“I cannot make you understand. I cannot make anyone understand what is happening inside me. I cannot even explain it to myself.”

— Franz Kafka // The Metamorphosis

me writing a platonic relationship: shit is this coming off as romance??

me writing a romantic relationship: shit is this coming off as platonic??

The hero shows up at the villain’s doorstep one night. They’re shivering, bleeding, scared. There’s also a slightly dazed look in their eyes– they were drugged. They look like they were assaulted. Looking up at the villain, swaying slightly as they’re close to passing out, they mumble “…didn’t know where else to go…” then collapse into the villain’s arms.

Here’s a Slytherin and Hufflepuff scenario you didn’t want to imagine.

In the British tv series Fresh Meat a group of students move in together. Most of them come from low income or middle class families, but one rich guy insists on moving in with them. To try and deter him one of the guys says this

Which is actually so fitting you’d think that was the original idea for the show: what if a Slytherin lived with a group of Hufflepuffs.

He’s a massive horndog who over the cause of the series goes from being mildly homophobic to realizing that the gay sex he got up to in his teens wasn’t just a phase, to realizing that his internalized homophobia was preventing him from accepting that he’s bisexual. Once he understands this he also becomes more open about the fact that he has a crush on literally every single one of his housemates, and his biggest dream becomes to have an orgy with all of them. He’s not going to pressure anyone into anything (they even had an entire episode dedicated to how good he is with consent) but if the opportunity for an orgy presents itself he will definitely point it out.

But he also becomes attached to them on a deep emotional level and even ends up buying the house so he can lower everyone’s rent and give them an incentive to stay with him.

So a Slytherin with a certified Hufflepuff fetish who just really really wants a mixed sex Hufflepuff harem. Now there’s one hell of a premise for a porno set in the Harry Potter universe. Gives a whole new meaning to “Slytherins and Hufflepuffs would get along great”

Anyway, have a gif of the show’s two bisexual characters having their own little dance party.

Me: I’m going to write today, I promise!!!

Also me:

no write only daydream