For Every We're So Back There Are Three Consecutive It's So Overs

for every we're so back there are three consecutive it's so overs

Nobody talk to me unless it is about Tyler Clancy and Josh

You and I Walk a Fragile Line - Farleigh Start x F!Reader - Part 5

a/n: hello!! i have a treat for u guys... so i know i said i don't really write smut but i felt like this story just needed it- this is my first time writing smut and it might lowkey suck. i hope it's good, i tried really hard but DAMN writing smut is not for the weak. props to you writers that do it so much better. anyways this part is kinda long BUTTT very juicy. please enjoy and leave a comment to tell me what you think or if you would like to be added to the taglist! also started posting this series on my ao3, it's the same as my tumblr username!

series masterlist

word count: 4.5k

warnings: language, alcohol, smut, fingering, angst, mentions of weed

You wake up to someone saying your name and shaking you. “Wake up,” You realize it’s Venetia. You blink a few times, your eyes adjusting to the warm golden light of your bedroom. 

“What?” Your voice comes out weak and hoarse. “Oh, thank God. I was worried about you,” She rubs your back and you groan, rolling over and shoving your face into the sheets.

“Where did you disappear to last night? All I remember is you and Farleigh going upstairs—” She stops in the middle of her sentence like she is just processing what she said. “Wait- did you and Farleigh-” 

“No! No, no, no.” You shake your head aggressively. You rack your brain to recall last night’s events. You remember drinking a lot of alcohol, making out with Farleigh, and then throwing up shortly afterwards. 

“Did you drink too much?” Venetia asks, her hand still on your back. “No…” You attempt to lie but you know it’s useless. 

You can’t hide your physical appearance, the sign that you obviously fell asleep drunk last night. You had slept in your dress, makeup was smudged all over your face and on the pillows of your bed, and your hair was tangled, the little butterfly clips that were once in it scattered around your bed. 

“Babes. Sit up, you need to drink some water.” She stands up and goes into your bathroom. You hear the faucet running as you slowly sit up, and your brain feels like it’s rolling around in your head.

“Oww,” You wince at the throbbing headache and adjust yourself, leaning against the headboard. Venetia returns and hands you a glass of water. You take it and hold it with both hands, not trusting your unstable grasp. You take a sip, letting the cool water refresh your dry throat.

“Haven’t seen Farleigh since last night either, come to think of it,” She remarks, watching you take little sips of the water. “Felix took a liking to Sadie. And you know, no one can deny Felix, so… you can guess how that went,” She chuckles to herself.

You pause and look at her. “Like, Sadie as in the one Elspeth was trying to set Farleigh up with?” You ask. Venetia nods. “Yep. Felix just can’t keep himself away from girls.” She tuts and shakes her head.

“Farleigh didn’t like her anyway,” You mutter. “I figured.” She looks at you strangely, like she’s trying to figure you out, or figure something out.

“You two seem a lot closer lately.” She raises an eyebrow. “No.” You immediately reply. She giggles at your quick response. “What? It’s not like it’s a bad thing,” She says.

“It is a bad thing.” You sigh and shake your head. Venetia narrows her eyes at you suspiciously before leaning back, deciding not to press you any further.

“What can I get you? Some painkillers?” She asks. “Yes, please.” You nod gratefully and she climbs off of your bed, heading out of your room.

You stare at the wall, thinking about last night. You didn’t want to think about it, but your mind kept going back to it. Although you were drunk and your brain was hazy, you can still remember it so clearly. The way his big hands felt so perfectly on your hips, the way he kissed your neck, the way you felt while you were underneath him. The way he made you feel. Your stomach flips as you press your thighs together, suddenly feeling warmth creep onto your face.

When Venetia returns, she refills your glass of water and hands you some pills to take. As you tip your head back to swallow the painkillers, you hear her gasp softly.

“Are those hickeys? On your neck?” You freeze and your heart drops. “Shit,” You curse under your breath. You knew there would be marks but you seemed to forget by the time you woke up.

“Oh my God,” Venetia laughs and playfully pushes you. Your face grows even more red and you glance down to avoid her gaze. “I fucking knew it,” She giggles with satisfaction and you let out an annoyed sigh.

“Please don’t go telling everyone. I don’t even know how it all happened,” You pinch the space between your eyes while closing them. “You know I won’t tell. I’m the best secret keeper around,” She nudges you softly.

“Just because we made out does not mean we’re anything,” You explain to her as if you’re trying to justify a crime. But deep down, some part of you wishes that wasn’t true. You want to at least be something to him. “We were just drunk.” Just drunk, you thought.

You manage to clean up your appearance and cover the bruises on your neck with lots of makeup. You walk downstairs to get some breakfast, maybe some toast or something to take it easy on your stomach.

You walk into the dining room and see Farleigh seated at his usual spot. After a brief moment of eye contact, you immediately drop your gaze to the floor and turn to walk to the buffet of fruit and pastries. You grab a plate and begin assembling your meal. You pause when you hear someone standing up from a chair and footsteps behind you.

Quickly, you turn around to see Farleigh walking out of the room. You watch him leave, confused by his sudden exit. You shrug and turn back to your breakfast, carrying your plate over to the table and sitting down.

You are enjoying the nice moment of peace and quiet as you take small bites of your croissant, until Felix walks in and stands on the other side of the table, looking down at you.

“Hey. Can we talk? Please?” He asks, sitting down in the chair across from you. You nod and take a drink of water.

“I’m sorry. I know Farleigh has told you things I have said. I don’t know if he’s making things up or telling the truth, but I’m sorry either way.” He says, twiddling his thumbs nervously.

“I forgive you, but why would you say those things if you didn’t mean them?” You reply, trying to find compassion for him while also trying to understand his mind. “I’m not sure. I just say dumb things sometimes, mate.”

Although this seemed like a half-assed apology and you were reluctant to accept it, you wanted things to go back to normal with Felix, or as normal as they could be, especially since you have to deal with him the rest of the summer. You want to enjoy every summer at Saltburn you have left before you graduate and move on with your life. But your thoughts still linger on why Felix treated you like some stray dog off the street during your argument a few days ago, and if he meant everything he said.

“Okay.” You nod and he grins. “Friends?” He holds out his hand for you to shake across the table. You lean forward and reach out, grabbing his hand and shaking it. “Friends.” You repeat.

Dinner that night feels different. Farleigh is quieter than usual, not interjecting with his little comments or jabs. He doesn’t even glance in your direction, even though you try staring him down multiple times. His eyes are glued to the table, or off to the side somewhere else. He’s been avoiding you all day, icing you out.

“How did you and Sadie get along, Farleigh?” Elspeth suddenly asks. Farleigh shrugs. “Alright,” He says simply. Elspeth tilts her head slightly and looks back down to her plate, a puzzled look on her face.

Venetia clears her throat. “I think Sadie and Felix got along especially well.” Felix coughs suddenly. “Venetia,” He mutters. She smirks, and you laugh quietly.

One evening, you walk downstairs to look for Venetia. It’s been three painful days of Farleigh ignoring and avoiding you. You can’t lie, you miss his company, as much as it pains you to admit it.

You find Farleigh sitting on the couch in the lounge room, reading a book. Now’s your chance. He can’t avoid you now.

You approach the couch and sit down next to him. He stiffens before standing up, placing the book on the arm of the couch, and walking out of the room. What the fuck? 

No, no. You can’t stand him ignoring you. It’s making your blood boil, that familiar feeling returning. Your anger towards him overcomes your senses.

You stand up and race after him, passing through the study, surrounded by tall, dark shelves of dusty old classics. You reach out and grab his wrist, forcing him to turn around. His cold and dark eyes pierce into you, and you can feel the tension already building. 

“Why are you avoiding me?” You ask, your voice coming out harsher than you expected. 

“Avoiding you?” He raises an eyebrow and acts clueless. Of course, he’s playing dumb. “Don’t know what you’re talking about.” He puts on a look of confusion, like he’s trying to figure something out.

“Bullshit. You haven’t talked to me for three days. You left me that night when I was literally throwing up,” Your voice seethes with anger. He tilts his head, only now realizing you are alluding to the other night’s events.

“I was drunk. We both were.”  He says. He steps forward, towering over you. “It didn’t mean anything. Don’t be an idiot,” He lowers his voice and his tone is condescending.

“Don’t do that. I know you felt it, too.” You say, lowering your own voice. You tighten your fingers around his wrist and stare deep into his eyes, searching for something, anything.

He pauses and stares right back at you. For a moment, everything is still. Until he rips his arm from your grasp and steps away.

“Felt what?” He asks, his voice cold. “Fuck you,” You whisper through gritted teeth, feeling angry because you know he’s bluffing.

“Oh yeah? You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” He replies teasingly, tilting his head with a slight smirk, showing his teeth.

You look away, clearly flustered and your face becomes hot. You aren’t sure what to say as you stare down at the floor. Before you know it he’s stepping back up to you and grabbing your wrist, pulling you close to him almost too quickly. You almost trip on your own feet as he effortlessly grabs you.

He leans down, his eyes flickering from your lips back to your own. You take the hint and stand on the tips of your toes to meet his height, tilting your head as your noses brush together. There’s only a millisecond of hesitation before he’s kissing you in the same way he did a few nights ago, like he’s making up for lost time.

His arms wrap around you hurriedly, desperately, as if you were trying to get away from him. Which you definitely weren’t. You place your hands on his chest to ground you as you both stumble backwards before your back hits one of the bookshelves.

You gasp for air and you hear Farleigh breathing heavily after he pulls away, but only for a brief second. His eyes are clouded with lust, his pupils blown wide, the black almost overtaking the beautiful brown rings around them.

His lips are on yours again, his body pinning you to the bookshelf. You reach your arms up to his broad shoulders as you feel his tongue slip into your mouth. Your eyes flutter with delight as you melt into the kiss, feeling his hands travel down to your lower back, and then your hips.

You feel his hand slip under your sundress and grab your thigh, pushing your leg up and to the side, giving some distance between your legs. He nudges his knee right in that spot, softly grinding it against you.

He pulls away to watch your reaction, biting his bottom lip as your eyes widen. Your lips part slightly and a soft moan escapes you. “Farleigh,” You gasp, your breath short as your hands grasp onto his shoulders.

“Hmm?” He mutters, tilting his head down to kiss your neck. Your neck is still sensitive from the bruises he had left last night, but you don’t care. Your mind can only seem to focus on the ache between your legs, your body practically screaming for him.

“Please,” You whisper, although you aren’t sure what you’re begging for. But he seems to know exactly what you want. He moves his knee slightly, still keeping your leg up, and the hand that was hooked under your thigh is now hiking your dress up for easier access. His fingers dance along your inner thigh and eventually, he’s pushing your panties to the side and your breath catches in your throat as you feel his finger dipping into your wet folds without warning.

He seems to groan in response to how soaked you are, and you would normally be embarrassed, but you’re too turned on at the moment to care. Your eyebrows draw upwards and your mouth falls open as his thumb nudges at your clit, tracing agonizingly slow circles. All you can do is whimper in response as he teases you, your knees feeling so weak, like you could fall over at any minute.

Suddenly, one of his long fingers is pushing deep into the heat of your cunt, pulling a short moan out of you as your head falls forward, your forehead resting on his chest. Your walls stretch around his digit and he groans again. “So tight,” He mutters, that alone almost causing your knees to give out. Not long after, he adds a second finger, his thumb still rubbing your clit at a slightly faster pace. You can feel that familiar heat building up in your lower stomach already, causing your heart to race even faster.

You begin to grind against his hand, rolling your hips mindlessly at the tempo he set for the both of you. You swear you hear him moan, his other hand’s grip on your waist tightening to keep you in place. He seems to be enjoying this just as much as you are, his fingers curling and gliding inside of you so delightfully. His fingertips brush up against that heavenly, spongy spot inside of you that you had never been able to reach on your own, causing your jaw to go slack.

“Shit- Right there,” You grip his shoulders even harder, your head lolling back. “Yeah?” He responds, his voice deep and raspy. You nod senselessly, and his fingers continue going deeper, determined to give you that pleasure you were chasing after. It’s almost too much, and your eyes begin to tear up as his fingers glide against that spot, over and over. You feel the white hot pleasure building and building, like a coil threatening to unravel at any moment. “Far-” You manage to choke out as if to warn him.

“Look at me,” Farleigh demands, and you don’t know if you can. Your head is tilted back and your eyes are fluttering, gazing up at the ceiling. “I can’t-” You shake your head as his fingers continue working on you, your chest heaving up and down. You want to feel that euphoric relief but you don’t want the moment to end either, but it feels so good that it almost starts to hurt.

He grabs your chin and tilts your head down so that you are forced to look right at him. Your eyes are glazed over and half-lidded, your lashes wet from your tears. “Such a slut. So easy to please,” He mutters, dragging his thumb down your swollen bottom lip. “I need– Can’t-” You whimper, apparently unable to form coherent sentences as you feel your climax approaching. “Need what, baby?” He asks tauntingly, and with one final stroke on your clit, you’re gone.

Your whole body tightens and stills, the pleasure racking through you. Your eyes roll back and you claw at his shoulders desperately as he helps you ride it out. When your eyes return to him, he has an almost pained expression on his face as he watches you come undone. He moans and lets go of your chin, letting your head fall back onto his chest. You lick the tears that built at the corners of your lips, your body going limp as you breathe heavily due to the aftermath of your intense orgasm. Eventually, he pulls his fingers out of your pussy, letting your dress fall back down over your legs. He takes the smallest step away from you, and you can finally raise your head enough to look up at him. His gaze bores into yours as he puts those two fingers into his mouth, tasting you, swirling his tongue over them. You can’t seem to look away. You’re fascinated by his dedication.

“See you in the morning,” His arms return to his sides and he grins smugly, turning to walk out of the study. You stand there in shock, not sure what to do with yourself. What the hell just happened? Your legs are still shaking as you flatten your dress with trembling hands. 

2 YEARS EARLIER

You glanced at yourself in the mirror, pulling your hair forward to fall over your shoulders. You spun around, observing the outfit that your roommate, Lola, had put together for you. A short, denim skirt with a cropped black top with some band’s name on it. It was simple but cute. 

“You look so good,” Lola stepped up behind you and grinned at your appearance. “I think I did a great job.” She nodded and slapped you on the ass. “You did. It was all you,” You told her, leaning forward to flick a remnant of mascara off your face.

You had gotten all dressed up to go clubbing with Lola. It took loads of convincing, but eventually, you agreed. In about a month or two, you would have to start revising for exams, and you wanted to get good scores. So, this was kind of your last chance to go out, have a good time, stay up late, drink, and party until you forget about your stress.

“Wait, do my extensions look alright? My sister bought them for me. She told me they were trending,” You turned around to examine her hair. She had put a few clip-in pink hair extensions to contrast her dark brown hair. “They look great.” You said. She smiled at you before turning around. “Let’s get going then,” She grabbed her purse and you followed suit, trying not to trip in your chunky platform boots.

Almost everyone you knew from Oxford was at that club. It was the closest one to campus, after all. Felix waved you and Lola over to the bar.

“So, Lola, how’s second term going for you?” Felix asked, sliding her a tall glass of beer. She shrugged, taking the beer and tasting the foam at the top. “Good. Can’t complain,” She grinned. “Same here. Just can’t wait for exams,” He remarked sarcastically.

“Oh, yeah. So excited,” You joined in, and you all chuckled. “Well, I’m going to the loo.” Lola nudged you and you turned to her. “C’mon,” She muttered. “Oh- Okay,” Felix watched you two walk off to the bathroom.

There was a line for the toilets, but instead Lola brought you to the side. “I don’t actually need to go. I just… have a question,” She had some kind of mischievous twinkle in her eyes. “What’s up?” You asked, raising an eyebrow.

“It’s about Felix. Is he single?” You groaned and facepalmed. “Lola. We’ve been over this.” Lola had an intense crush on Felix ever since you introduced them to each other. You told her that it would make things awkward if they dated, considering they were both your best friends, but she never seemed to give up on her dream.

“Well, is he?” She exclaimed, throwing her hands up. “I don’t know. He’s not really one to… settle down. He gets with a different girl, like, every other night.” You shrugged helplessly. Lola bit her lip, considering her options.

“If you are wanting a serious relationship with him, good luck.” You shook your head. Lola raised her eyebrows. “So, what about just a shag?” She asked. You rolled your eyes. “I mean, he probably wouldn’t be opposed to that.” 

“Okay. What should I say?” Lola chewed on her nail nervously. “Uhh, just… Flirt, I guess.” You shrugged. She groaned. “You are absolutely no help.” She pat you on the shoulder before spinning on her heel and walking back out into the club and towards the bar again. “Good luck!” You shouted after her, but you don’t think she heard you. 

Great. Now you were on your own. You sighed and walked out of the bathroom, shoving past groups of girls and loud men. You headed over to the lounge area, where many people sat on the velvet couches, smoking, playing drinking games, or full on making out.

You recognized one of the people in the corner. Farleigh. He was heavily making out with someone, almost grinding on them. It was most likely Sasha, you thought. But no, the other person was too tall to be Sasha. You squinted and walked a bit closer. Joshua?!

Farleigh was making out with Joshua Brown. “The fuck?” You muttered under your breath. You thought Joshua was straight. I mean, he liked girls so much, it never would have crossed your mind that he would be into men.

You wondered if you should tell Sasha about this… situation. You knew she was here tonight, you saw her earlier shaking ass on the dancefloor. And you could have sworn Farleigh was right next to her. Oh well. You wanted an excuse to snitch on Farleigh.

You backed away and walked speedily to the dancefloor, searching for Sasha. “Have you seen Sasha?” You asked a random girl. She shook her head.

You moved through the throng of students and eventually saw her. She was standing towards the edge of the dancefloor, speaking to one of her girl friends, nodding enthusiastically.

“Sasha!” You jogged over to her and paused to catch your breath. She looked you up and down like she was trying to recognize you. “Uhhh..” She trailed off, glancing to her friend. Her friend shook her head, as if to say, ‘I don’t know her either.’

“I know you don’t know me. Well, maybe you do and you just forgot, but-” You paused, realizing you sound stupid. “Anyways. I just wanted to ask if you were aware that Farleigh and Joshua Brown are making out right now…?” 

She stared at you like you just spoke a different language. Then, she finally seemed to process what you said. “What? Really?” Her eyes widened and she looked over to her friend once again. You nodded. “Sorry.” 

“No, you have nothing to be sorry for. Where exactly was this happening?” She asked, and you could tell she was mad. You could feel the rage radiating from her.

“Over by the lounge,” You told her, pointing to the opposite side of the club where you had just come from. She nodded and grabbed her friend’s hand. “Let’s go get this dumb bitch,” Sasha told her.

“Yikes,” You whispered, watching them storm off together. You kind of wanted to see Farleigh get his ass handed to him, so you followed far behind them.

They were still all over each other by the time Sasha and her friend reached them. “Hey, what the fuck?!” Sasha yelled, earning a few glances from some innocent bystanders. Farleigh froze and pushed Joshua off of him. “Shit. Hey, Sasha.” He stood there awkwardly.

Sasha stepped up to him and slapped him across the face. “Are you a fucking idiot? You asshole! Did you think I wouldn’t catch you?” Farleigh’s eyes widened as he stared down at her, completely at a stand still.

“You fucking cheater,” Her voice seethed with anger. “What, have you two already shagged?” She pointed to Joshua. Joshua just stood there, eyes wide and face flushed with embarrassment. “No, we haven’t.” Farleigh replied. “And it’s not cheating. We were just-” 

“Shut the fuck up.” She raised her finger at Farleigh. “Sasha, baby, please.” He opened his arms and she shook her head. “No. You’re probably high. I can smell the fucking weed on you,”

Farleigh’s eyes trailed from Sasha over to you. His eyes narrowed and it’s like he knew immediately that you were the one who snitched on him. You lowered your gaze to the floor and stepped back before turning and walking away.

Later that night, you sat with Joshua in his dorm, consoling him as he cried. Lola had texted you to inform you that she and Felix were going back to his place. You guessed she was successful after all. You held him as his shoulders shook, feeling his tears falling onto your shirt. 

“I feel awful. Sasha didn’t deserve that,” He looked up at you and you nodded. “I know. Listen, they’ll be back together in no time. Trust me.” You pat his head. “And now everyone thinks I’m gay,” He sobbed.

“Well.. are you?” You asked, curiosity getting the best of you. He shrugged. “I’ve just always thought Farleigh was so hot and tonight… well, he gave me some weed and then he kissed me. How could I say no?”

Oh. It made so much sense now. Joshua was always talking about Farleigh, how he was good with both girls and boys, and his skills. You thought maybe he had been jealous, but all along, he just had a crush on him.

“Damn. It’s okay. It may… take some time to figure things out, you know?” You rubbed his back and he sniffled. 

You stayed the night at Joshua’s. It was already too late for you to return back to your own dorm, and you didn’t even have the key to your room. Lola did, and you knew she wasn’t there. He fell asleep with his head on your lap, so you had no choice but to lean back and try to get some sleep, despite the uncomfortable position you were in.

To no surprise, you heard Sasha and Farleigh fucking during the early hours of the morning. You knew their relationship was so fucked that Farleigh cheating wouldn’t change anything. Sasha pretended to be angry, but she loved him too much to break up with him. So instead, they just fucked.

You sat there and stared at the wall, wondering if Farleigh was the problem or if Sasha was. Sasha was psychotic, but Farleigh was the one making out with someone else. Maybe Sasha gave him a pass because he was high. Either way, you figured they were very dysfunctional. But why were you so invested in trying to figure them out, or rather, figure him out? You decided to think about that question in the morning as you drifted off to sleep.

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