IN EVERY LIFETIME !

IN EVERY LIFETIME !

j. viper x reader smau

synopsis: y/n was shoved into a world where they would have to play the therapist. but when someone adamantly refuses to be helped, even while being friends, the only question that remains is why? the best way to find the reason is to look for it, all while harboring a secret crush on both ends.

genre: smau, slowburn, idiots to lovers (idiots in the sense that neither believes their own feelings are there), angst, crack, fluff.

warnings: a lot of cursing.

note: listen. there are no jamil smaus and i decided to make one myself. also there are many chapters bc it forces me to actually do a slowburn so LMAOOOO yay! tbh though, do not be surprised if i delete some chapters in case it feels like i have nothing to write for that chapter. comment here or in any chapter, send an ask, or dm me to be added to the taglist!

Keep reading

Can we get *ahem* anatomy (dick) headcanons? Like, bad dragon, inhuman vibes because we stan monster fuckers? I'm thirsty for everyone, so do your faves or something haha.

Yes, yes we do stan monster fuckers in this house. My faves you say? Have all the brothers because I'm feeling generous today.

What their anatomy is like [AKA dick HCs]

Characters: Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, Belphegor

Genre: NSFW

Pronouns: GN [You/Your] for the most part. There are some sections that have headcanons that mention female anatomy, but they are marked with [AFAB], so you can avoid it if it makes you uncomfortable. 💕

CW: | Teratophilia | Explicit sexual content | Implied Poly!Reader in some sections |

Notes: This turned into an odd mixture of what their dicks look like and other general NSFW headcanons because I didn’t just want to plaster a link and go ‘this is what it looks like.’ It’s still centred around their anatomy, but there are other HCs mixed in. ☺️

Minors, DNI. NSFW content.

Lucifer

Based off the Demogorgon dildo.

• Lucifer's cock is as gorgeous as it is intimidating. It's a pretty dark red colour that has a highlight of black over it, and with the pronounced curve and lovely texture, you'll get some very pleasant G-spot stimulation.

• The tip of his cock is rather large, so it will take quite a bit of preparation to properly take, but if you thought it would be smooth sailing from there, well you're just naive, huh? If you thought the tip was hard to take, you'll be in for a nasty surprise when you suddenly find yourself having a white-knuckle grip on the sheets when Lucifer bottoms out.

• Because holy fuck, the base of Lucifer's cock is huge, and at 9.5 inches and being amongst the largest of the seven brothers, you're going to be filled to the brim and won't be able to form a single coherent thought.

• And Lucifer can only smirk at your reactions because he knows. He knows that he looks good, he knows that he's big, and he knows that he's bruising you from the inside, and sadistic as he is, he loves watching you struggle to take him.

• Lucifer's cock practically throbs with excitement every time you scream out how much you love his cock, how big he is. It's his sin at work, but he will slow down and edge you until he can get you begging and whimpering those sweet words. He'll make sure you fuel his pride until he resumes fucking into you, and he's a very patient man, so he can do it all night if you want to be difficult.

• Lucifer is very warm. There's no particular reason or explanation as to why he's got this particular quirk with his anatomy, but his cock runs warmer than the rest of his body, and his pre-cum and cum even warmer — somewhat comparable to molten wax. It's actually great for stimulation, and it'll feel all the nicer if you're blindfolded to heighten your senses.

• And you best believe that Lucifer greatly enjoys depriving you of your senses, so he'll be using this part of him to his advantage.

• Another quirk of his is that when he's aroused, he shifts into his demon form. Lucifer doesn't necessarily mean to do it, but his instincts scream at him to do it. It has something to do with being at his most elegant-looking because the prideful demon in him wants him to make sure you'll be seduced. Kind of like his symbolic animal.

• He has quite the strong and imposing scent, so you best believe that other demons will know who fucked you so good that you can barely walk a straight line.

Mammon

Based off the Demon Dick dildo.

• In of itself, the shape of Mammon's cock is pretty standard when it comes to demons — mainly with the elongated, pointed and spade-like tip — but that doesn't make it any less impressive, being a good 8 inches in length with a pretty generous shaft in terms of girth, but all without being too uncomfortably large. His cock isn’t too odd of a colour when compared to his brothers. It follows his tan skin, though the tip is a faint, dark red colour, and his veins are pitch black.

• He’d rather kiss Lucifer’s shoes before admitting this out loud, but Mammon is actually rather insecure about his dick. He’s not overly fond of how seemingly… plain it is. Especially if you’ve been intimate with any of his brothers prior to him, he’ll worry that he won’t be able to live up to your expectations and seem mediocre in comparison. So, please praise and worship him — make Mammon understand that he’s perfect just the way he is.

• After he sees just how good he’s fucking you, how you’re drooling about how good his cock feels, his ego soars. He slides in so wonderfully, and you wrap around him so nicely that it feels like your hole was meant to take his, and only his cock. And as your first man, it drives him absolutely over the edge — of course you're meant for him.

• The thing is, being a higher-ranking demon, Mammon's anatomy does differ in a way that makes a huge difference in the pleasure you'll be receiving with him versus a regular demon. What he has that lessers don't, are tantalizing, scale-like ridges, running from the underside of his tip all the way to the base, as well as smooth yet prominent bumps running down his shaft.

• I can guarantee that Mammon will have no problem pulling orgasm after orgasm from you; the texture of his cock just hits all of the right spots. And honey, it’s a promise that he’ll make a mess out of you. It’s his mission to make sure you’re both covered in a mixture of both his and your cum.

• The ridges on the underside of his cock are very sensitive, so get on your knees for him and tease the scales with your tongue. He’ll come undone so beautifully for you. 💕

• [AFAB] Similarly, he loves getting a pussy job from you. Straddle his lap and let him grip your hips so that he can slowly guide your movements. He lives for the feeling of your slick pussy rubbing against the ridges, and on the flip side, having them glide against your clit will threaten to make you double over in pleasure.

• It won’t take too long for his insecurities to diminish, and you’ll be sure that he’s gonna be bragging about how much you love his cock.

Leviathan

Based on the Orochi dildo.

• Oh, Levi. Sweet, awkward, easily-flustered, shy little Leviathan.

• Yeah, he's fucking hung. He's the perfect example of the shy, nerdy boy who's secretly got a monster cock trope — figuratively and literally.

• Out of the seven brothers, Levi is actually the second largest in terms of girth, beating Lucifer by just a bit. Sitting at a respectable 7 inches, no, he doesn't have the most length, but does he really need it when he has a thick, scaly and heavily textured cock as he does?

• Or two.

• No, you're not hallucinating, (Y/N), Levi has two cocks. Huh? But he only had one a few days ago? You'd be correct, but Levi will let you in on a little secret: he has a second cock sheathed beneath a little slit hidden within the pretty scales lining his pelvic area. He is a sea monster and a demon, after all.

• So, what are you in the mood for? Do you want a smooth ride? Maybe you're feeling a little lazy or worn out from your day and think you only have the energy to handle one cock? No problem. Or maybe you're feeling like an utter monster-fucking whore and want to be stuffed to the brim with two, fat demon cocks? Leviathan's got you.

• It did take a lot of courage for him to show you this part of him; he was pretty awkward about it and was persuaded that it’d scare you off and that you’d break up with this gross, worthless shut-in of an otaku with weird-looking di—

• Please don't tease him about his reptile-like anatomy. He's super insecure about it, but he does — slowly but surely — come to appreciate it more when he realizes just how much of a monster-fucker you are.

• What's not to love? His shaft is covered in smooth scales and lined with mouth-watering bends and curves, and add the thick, textured tip, and you've got one of the most unique monster-cocks you'll take. From the head to the base, he's a really pretty orange that fades into a gold colour.

• When you want to take both of his cocks, Levi is in a bit of a mental limbo. On one hand, can a human even take two at once? Especially if it's in the same hole?? He doesn't want to hurt you! But on the other hand... fuck, that's hot.

• He's come to realize that he has a huge kink for interspecies sex. So, seeing his human stuffed full of serpentine cock brings out the unhinged Grand Admiral of Hell's Navy in him.

• Loves having you suck on one while he jerks off the other. Getting to cum both in your mouth and on your face? Fuck yes. But be warned that Leviathan cums a lot. He has the heaviest loads among his brothers.

• One thing he loathes about his anatomy is that the scales on his cock(s) do shed every other month. You'll know when he's preparing to shed because he's constantly shifting uncomfortably because of how itchy he is, and he refuses to let you see him naked when in this state. The scales are so dull and ugly-looking — to him — and he doesn't want to gross you out.

• Eventually — with a lot of reassurance — he does let you see him while in shed, and yes, the scales are dull-looking, but that doesn't really matter, because you've both come to discover that being surrounded by your warmth helps calm the itch until the old scales are ready to come off.

• So, cockwarming the sea demon becomes a regular when he's in shed. It's a really intimate thing between the two of you, and it's honestly quite sweet, especially knowing that it's a really vulnerable moment for Levi.

Satan

Based off the Austin dildo.

• At first glance, Satan’s cock seems pretty normal. Hell, it almost looks like humanoid anatomy, and if you’ve been intimate with any of his brothers before, this might make you raise a bit of an eyebrow. Like, it’s very nice looking and definitely looks like it’ll fit so nicely inside of you. After all, it is a good 8.5 inches with just the right amount of girth to feel amazing without causing any initial discomfort.

• Sure, he’s got some very nice ripples at the underside of his tip, but that was about the only non-human thing you could make out. Even in terms of colour, it’s the same colour as his skin tone.

• He fits inside of you so perfectly, so there’s really no reason to complain. Besides, are you really going to bitch to Satan that his cock isn’t ‘demonic’ enough for you? Just lay back, spread your legs and let him bottom out so that he can—

• Oh… oh he has a fucking knot.

• Surprise! Among the brothers, Satan is one to have a more animalistic type of anatomy, having the canine-like feature of a knot — a thick one at that. It’s a bit of a challenge to fit; it’ll stretch you quite a bit, and Satan will have to gently ease it into you to avoid too much discomfort.

• But once it’s in, and you’re properly stretched, well… let’s just say that Satan’s demon instincts will be getting the best of him, so prepare for a long night of screaming and climaxing.

• And yes, his knot does swell when he cums, so you’ll be locked in some cockwarming sessions between rounds. These will probably be the more romantic and intimate moments of sex with Satan because otherwise, Satan’s cock was meant to breed and fuck senseless.

• You’ll be walking — crawling — out of his room with bite marks and deep scratches littering your body, and maybe even bruises from areas that he gripped too hard. Whenever his knot swells, his claws and fangs just… come out — it’s an instinct. But don’t worry, Satan is so good, gentle and attentive with aftercare. You won’t hurt at all when he’s done with you. 💕

• Satan’s scent is the strongest amongst the brothers, and it’s a highly territorial scent. He doesn’t do it on purpose, it’s just how his body is during intercourse.

• Even if you’ve fully cleaned yourself, even days after you’ve had sex with him, everybody will be able to smell him on you. Everybody will know that you’ve been fucked by Satan. For a good two to three days, none of the brothers will fuck you because they can still smell the scent of Satan’s cum between your legs, even when you’re clothed, and they know better than to try anything. Seriously: Asmo got growled at, Mammon’s arm was nearly mauled one time, and he nearly jumped Belphegor. Even Lucifer doesn’t try anything until Satan’s smell naturally starts to dim.

• You know it’s intense when Lucifer won’t even bother. That’s enough to make Satan’s ego hit the ceiling.

Asmodeus

Based off the Lenneth dildo.

• One would think that a sex demon like Asmo would be well-endowed, but surprisingly, Asmo is the smallest of all the brothers. He’s sitting at 6.5 inches, and although his girth is above average for a human, by demon standards he’s rather average.

• But don’t worry about that, because that shit doesn’t matter. The Avatar of Lust can do things with his cock, so lacking in size in comparison to his brothers does not hinder his confidence whatsoever. He’s gorgeous, and he knows what he’s doing, so why would he be bothered?

• First, let’s establish just how pretty he is. He has a nice, long and pronounced head, and although his shaft is slim, it curves very nicely and can hit some amazing spots, and he’s very textured. He doesn’t have as many ridges as Mammon does at the underside, but Asmo does have a few of them. They’re less scale-like than Mammon and feel more like flesh. The tip is pink and fades into a very light purple at the base.

• What’s the most interesting about Asmo is that he has a lot of… perks. You see, he has extra glands in his system that allows him to secrete fluids similar to pre-cum of various effects during intercourse

• For example, he can secrete a type of pleasure-enhancing aphrodisiac. Doing so will make sure that all of your sweet spots become even more sensitive. The more of the aphrodisiac he secretes, the more sensitive you’ll become, and it can get to a point where it can be so torturous that the slightest puff of air between your legs will have you pulsing and whimpering.

• [AFAB] He loves leaking little drops of his aphrodisiac onto your clit and watch with a sly grin as you cum over and over from the slightest little movement before even getting to the main event. Whether it’s with slow strokes of his fingertips or tongues — yes, he has multiple — or by lightly tapping you with his cock, you’ll be fucked out before you even know what hit you.

• Other things he can do include increasing his or your fertility, but on the flip side, he can also produce a contraceptive liquid, making it safe for him to cum inside of you should it be a potential issue.

• With another type of aphrodisiac, he can make your sex drive go absolutely insane, meaning that you’ll be able to go for multiple earth-shattering orgasms without feeling your energy drop. In fact, the effects are so potent that you’ll be begging for him to make you cum on his cock over and over because ‘Asmo, it hurts, I need to cum so bad.’ He’ll get you so bothered that you’ll feel like you may die if he doesn’t rail you with that pretty cock of his.

• And in general, Asmo has the best technique of all his brothers, so he doesn’t need a monster-sized cock to have you fucked stupid. His cock just seemingly hits all of the right spots so effortlessly, and he’ll make sure that you’ll come crawling back to him after he’s done with you.

• Asmo can and will ruin everybody else for you. You’ll understand one of the core reasons why his fans love him so much.

Beelzebub

Based off the Hunter dildo.

• Oh boy. It's no secret that Beelzebub is a big guy, and yes, the same goes for his cock. The man doesn't even need to be naked or even hard for you to notice the sizable bulge in his pants. It's as if nothing can properly contain him.

• Being the largest of all the brothers — and can rival Diavolo himself — Beel is packing 10.5 inches of thick, heavy cock. Unless you have very large hands, you'll barely be able to wrap both of your hands around him. He really was crafted by God himself — muscular and absolutely blessed in every way possible.

• He's intimidating, that's for sure. Don't worry too much though, Beel is a gentle giant and will take his time making sure you're comfortable, relaxed and properly ready for him. He won't be mad at you if you can't fit all of him, because he's happy to be inside you, even if it's just the tip.

• Mention how big he is compared to you, and you'll have him flustered, because fuck, you look just so cute and tiny. Compare parts of yourself to his cock: your face, your forearms, your hands, etc — the size difference is actually insane, and he's all for it. As gentle as he is, he can't deny that he's eager to see the small, fragile human get destroyed.

• He loves seeing you suck on the tip of his cock, eagerly and desperately trying to fit more of him in your mouth. Watching you struggle just stirs something in his gut.

• Starting at the tip, Beel's cock is a light bronze but fades into a darker brown from the middle all the way down to the base. He's got it all, really — a nicely pointed and slightly curved tip, plates lining the top, curves in all the right places and breathtaking, large bumps lining his frenulum and base.

• He'll make sure that you cum multiple times before he even thinks of sliding inside of you — with his fingers, his mouth and even various dildos, using one larger than the last with every orgasm you have.

• Beel always uses extra lube, but no matter how much he does for you, the stretch is unavoidable. He'll take his time, and admittedly, Beel basks in the way merely entering you has your tongue lolling out and your eyes rolling back.

• He starts slow, but with his size, even with the slowest of thrusts you feel like your insides are getting pulverized, but fuck, he hits all the right spots so well. He's so large and perfectly textured that there's no area getting neglected.

• But when you're properly adjusted and begging him to go harder, you can pay your respects to your legs, because sweet baby Beel is gone, and demon lord Beelzebub is here.

• He'll make you grip the sheets so hard your knuckles will turn white, and you'll either be screaming or struggling to find your breath from the sheer size of him. No in between

• There's always a bulge in your stomach from his cock, and his palm will always be pressed up right against it.

Belphegor

Based off the Chance dildo.

• Belphegor, along with Satan, has one of the more animalistic-looking dicks amongst the brothers and takes the expression of 'having a horse cock' to dangerously literal levels. The first time you were intimate, Belphie was admittedly worried that his anatomy would turn you off, frighten or gross you out. Even for demon standards, Belphie's anatomy was uncommon, so he couldn't even begin to imagine what you — a human — would think.

• Good thing that you're a monster fucker and absolutely fucking drooled when he shed his clothes, huh? That certainly helped his ego.

• Firstly, let’s establish that his cock, from the tip all the way down to his balls, is pitch black, except for a small group of splotches — similar to his cow-like spots on his shoulder — at the middle that are dark purple

• If his twin is the largest, then on the flip side, Belphegor has the most impressive length amongst the seven demon brothers, being a jaw-dropping 12.5 inches which actually makes him bigger than Beelzebub in terms of length. Just looking at the outline of his bulge trailing down his thigh is telling enough of what you're in for.

• If you catch this demon wearing only sweats and no boxers, well... try not to stare between his legs too much. Or do. Belphie doesn't mind. He'll put on a little show for you if he's feeling generous. Or he'll call you out for being a little whore, especially if his brothers are nearby.

• He may not have the most girth, but Belphegor doesn't even need it to make an incoherent mess out of you. You're in for a lot of depth play, and it will take quite the effort for you to take all of him. And honestly? Seeing you squirm and whimpering how 'it's too deep, Belphie,' as he bottoms out? That just makes him harder.

• The tip of his cock is naturally rather wide, but when aroused, it flares and grows in size, and the shape of it will assure that every single little sweet spot of yours gets abused — every single spot, at every angle, over and over again. It's definitely the hardest part of him to fit inside of you, and you may need extra lube and prep to lessen the initial discomfort, but once it's in, and you're properly adjusted, it's a pretty smooth ride.

• He's veiny from top to bottom, and they are prominent, adding all the more texture that will never fail to have you wonderfully fucked out. Add the bulging ring in the middle of his shaft, and you can only imagine the myriad of sensations he'll be providing. So yeah, girth? Doesn't need it.

• Belphie loves having you ride him — whether you're front facing so that he can play with your chest, or in reverse so that he can smack your ass as you bounce, he doesn't care. While this does stem from his laziness, it's also to let you get comfortable at your own pace; taking a monster-length cock can be uncomfortable, so unless you explicitly state you want him to pound into you, he'll let you take him as you please.

• But be warned, if you do ask Belphegor to do so, be prepared to feel his cock rail the deepest parts of you. He’ll push your legs against your chest and fuck you like a sadistic demon in heat. He'll rearrange your insides with no mercy shown unless you yell out a safe word, and he will knock the wind out of you with every single thrust and pull streams of tears from you. That's a promise.

• [AFAB] Although it's not physically possible for a human, Belphie can and will fuck so deep into you that it'll feel like he's gonna breach and breed your womb.

• Now, who wants to get double-stuffed by the twins? Belphie might just share with Beel.

I hope you liked these!

Also, what do you think of Levi’s section? I know some like him with one, and some like him with two. I know I like reading fics with either option, so I said ‘fuck it, I’m grabbing those two HCs, mashing them up together, and this is their love child.’

I struggled the most to find ideas for Satan and Lucifer, but I think they came out alright?

Who’s your favourite? I know my bias tends to come through for Belphie and Levi, so I don’t think I need to say it haha.

Nightbringer mc

You can not convince me that Solomon doesn't have videos of mc chasing their own tail or scaring themselves when their wings touch something.

Ever since gaining this new form, it's been a struggle. Learning how to use their new extremities and limbs. New parts of their brain have been activated thanks to the new physical form. So when mc's wings subconsciously move or instinctively flap, they get spooked and flinch, and Solomon tries so hard to hold his tongue and not laugh.

Or when mc's tail kept moving all on its own, and it was pissing themselves off. Solomon holds up his phone and records his student going in circles like a dog trying to catch their own tail and getting so frustrated " BECAUSE IT WONT FUCKING STAY STILL!!!"

Antique beaded nightshades part two.

PLEAASEEEE

this the kinda shit I can see going down post Riddle’s overblot if Yuu was petty & felt like holding a grudge

(Incoming babble as a note to self Ig)

Like- I refuse to believe that we( as the player) get out of every situation in this school of magically-gifted assholes WITHOUT some kind of scratch. Especially in the case of an overblot. Like sure “let bygones be bygones” and move on to the next plot relevant- destined chaos. Pretty sure that Riddle threw a rose bush at either Ace or Yuu, but the entire rose garden was getting uprooted. Everything HAD to be flying or getting thrown around

Lunchtime Disagreements

Yuu and Ace get along for some very specific reasons. Unfortunately for Riddle, he is about to find out one of the things they have in common.

(Yuu on the other hand, has had a rough week. They woke up and chose violence. They will not be apologizing.)

A/N: Hi :)

Rule number 271: One must leave the table within 15 minutes of completing their lunch

"Yeah that's not going to happen."

Every Heartslabyul student around their lunch table seems to freeze, anxiously watching red rise to their housewarden's cheeks. Yuu on the other hand settles deeper into their seat, the picture of indolence. Grimm, always down for mischief, hops onto the tabletop, moving the empty Ramshackle lunch trays to the side so he can comfortably turn into a cat loaf in the smack middle of everybody. He shoots a satisfied shit-eating grin up at Riddle Rosehearts, delighting in the frustrated expression on the young man's face.

"Excuse me?"

The Ramshackle prefect finishes off their burger, and then calmly turns to give Riddle Rosehearts their full attention.

"Thanks for the suggestion, but I'm good. Thanks but no." The prefect shoots the housewarden a polite smile before sipping on their carbonated beverage. The redhead blinked, thrown off by the other student's nonchalance of the subject.

"Suggestion... you can't just... the rules-"

"Are completely asinine, let alone inefficient and inapplicable to our current situation." They take another long sip of their drink while the older boy grows steadily redder.

"ASININE?!!"

"Mm-hmm" they hummed, bobbing their head in casual acknowledgment. Calmly setting down their drink, they raised their hand so they could count off for the Heartslybul Housewarden. "One, I am not a Heartslybul student. Therefore, your word is not my law."

Ace was trying very hard to hide his snickers at Riddle's grinding teeth. (He wasn't trying at all honestly but if anybody asks he's going to stick with his story thank you very much.)

"Two, this is not the Heartslybul dorm. There is no polite societal convention that demands I attempt to follow your dorm rules in the neutral territory that is the cafeteria."

Riddle now resembles a tomato, hair blending in with the color of his face. Deuce and Cater exchange nervous glances.

"Three, my next class is alchemy, and according to the time, the Alchemy Lab won't be open for at least 30 more minutes. So instead of staying here and, oh I don't know, getting ahead on my alchemy readings, you want me to leave. And do what, exactly?"

Trey was sweating in his seat. Tentatively, he reached out to the Ramshackle prefect, hoping to make this conversation just stop. "Hey, okay, I think you made your-"

"I'm not finished" they snapped, whipping around to glare at the Vice Warden's outstretched hand. When it dropped back to Trey's side, they turned back to the dorm leader. Riddle was seething, face so red that steam was quite literally going to rise from his face if someone poured water on him. And honestly, at this point, Yuu was kinda pissed too. So when Riddle opened his mouth to take advantage of the pause in their tirade, they stood up and crowded into his space, not willing to let this go until they said their piece.

"Your precious rules are more often than not completely senseless. Name me one benefit, one productive result, one good reason why rule 271 should be followed in every scenario, regardless of circumstance, and I'll take it all back."

They paused, to give Riddle a chance to rebuke them. They didn't pause longer than a second, but let the record show they did pause.

"You can't, can you? Because there are none. There is no good reason for your out-of-pocket rule. That's because it's an insane rule created by an insane woman."

"OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!"

Students wearing rose-red armbands flinched in the courtyard, frantically searching for where their leader could be. It was a fearful response, fueled by the sheer anger they heard in his voice, but they were also curious about exactly what moron was capable of upsetting their mini tyrant so immensely. The Heartslybul students in the courtyard soon figured that since he wasn't in sight, Riddle must be tearing into someone still in the cafeteria. There was collective relief, but those students also sent up a collective prayer for the poor soul on the other side of their housewarden's unique magic.

Meanwhile, inside there's a flash where the freshman prefect was standing, bright light taking its time to dissipate from their silhouette. When it does, the cafeteria is silent, shock settling heavily in the atmosphere. Riddle, who had still been as red as his namesake, rapidly began to pale at the sight before him.

Yuu stretched their neck, with no collar on them to impede the motion. They slouched back into their seat, reaching over to begin petting Grimm behind his ears. The creature's body is forced to relax under the careful touches, his tense posture melting back into a content cat loaf. The prefect themselves are pretty content with the way this argument turned out, although... one last nail in the coffin couldn't hurt his ego any more than they already have.

"I don't have any magic Housewarden Rosehearts. 'Off With Your Head' is useless against me where there is nothing for your spell to contain. So if you want to effectively throw a tantrum next time I'm verbally kicking your ass..." Their eyes locked onto his stormy grey eyes, a small, conspiratorial smirk tugging at the corner of their lips.

"You're gonna need to turn that collar into a muzzle."