Stay~ (Stickvin Oneshot)

Stay~ (Stickvin Oneshot)

*A Yandere Toppat Charles x Henry Stickmin Oneshot*

      "Join the clan Henry~ No government or prison will even touch you, not if I have a say in it. You'll be safe with me, Henry, I promise. Just let me love you Henry, and stay." 

Those were the words that Charles used to convince Henry to be on this airship. He knew Charles could be possessive, but he wasn't expecting him to be THIS possessive. Charles wouldn't let anyone near Henry, and he rarely left Henry alone. When there was a meeting, Charles had Henry in his lap. When Henry went to the restroom, Charles waited just outside the door. Charles had his arm wrapped around Henry most of the time, he barely gave Henry any privacy. It was driving him mad. Henry wasn't sure what to do. He liked Charles, he really did, but he needed space. So Henry ran and hid throughout the airship, hoping to just have a little bit of alone time. He managed to run off while Charles was in the shower, none of the other Toppats got in his way, they usually avoided Henry due to the fact that Charles got very angry when they were "too close" to him, and Charles wasn't afraid to hurt people for being so. He was a fine leader to the other Toppats when he had Henry with him, but when he didn't… he was frightening.. 

     Henry crawled through the vents until he reached the airship's outdoor balcony. He just wanted some alone time. He felt the heavy wind whipping against his thin body as he watched the clouds pass by. Henry took deep breaths, savoring this moment of peace. He thought about Charles. Why did he love him? He had set off so many red flags he might as well just be a red flag made of other red flags sewn together into a gigantic red flag… and yet Henry loved him enough to agree to stay. To be honest, Henry kind of liked Charles when the two of them were alone. Charles was so affectionate, and practically worshipped Henry. He'd give Henry hugs, kisses, massages… he just spoiled Henry. But when other people were around he scared Henry with his possessiveness. This wasn't right… was it? This was dangerous. This was stressful. This wasn't healthy. Not like this. Henry knew he needed to talk to Charles. Maybe he could get through to him. Maybe he could- "Oi, Henry. What're you doing out here? Boss will freak out if he sees you're missing." Henry jumped in surprise at the sudden voice. He turned to face the Toppat. Rupert Price. He was one of the higher ups in the clan, but that fact wouldn't keep him safe from Charles's wrath if he was caught talking to Henry alone. "I know, I'm sorry. I just… needed space. If Charles starts looking for me, just tell him I'm here. He'll find me." Henry replied. He wanted to be able to talk to the other members of the Toppat Clan, but he knew it only threw them into danger. Charles was a yandere, that was just who he was. "Yeah, I will." Rupert took his leave, he didn't want to be added to his boss's list of casualties. 

     Henry leaned over the red, metal, guard rails. It felt cold against the skin on his hands. He gripped the railing so tightly his knuckles had turned white. What was he going to tell Charles? How do you convince a yandere to calm down and be less of a, well, a yandere!? Charles wasn't one to quit. Henry knew that better than anyone else. Henry took deep breaths trying to focus.

----

    "Oh Henry~!" Charles called out to his lover as he stepped out of the shower into their shared bedroom. Then paused when he noticed when the room was empty. Charles froze. Where had Henry gone? His one true love, his treasure, wasn't here. Had he run off? Or had a member of the Toppat Clan decided to attempt to take his precious sweetheart away from him? Not. Happening. Charles quickly changed into his usual clothes. His signature red top hat and headset combo upon his head. Charles walked angrily through the airship in search of Henry. The other clan members backed away from him, not wanting to upset him further and become victims. Rupert peered around a corner only to appear behind Charles. "Oi- Hey boss." Charles whipped his head around so fast it made Rupert jump. His piercing green irises staring intently through Rupert. "Yes? Rupert?" Charles asked (practically snapped), his voice had such an edge to it that it felt as though it would cut people. "Uh.. Henry's out on the balcony. Ya know… since you seem to be… looking for him.." Rupert trailed off nervously, hoping that Charles would calm down. "I see…" Charles said as he walked towards Rupert. The other Toppats only watched awkwardly. Charles suddenly grabbed Rupert's neck, his grip was tight and relentless. "..and why, may I ask, do you know his whereabouts while I do not?" His voice was cold, and erie. " *gasp* I-I saw him out there while I was w-walking by! *cough* I swear!" Rupert struggled to breathe as Charles's grip on his throat tightened slightly. Charles let go of Rupert. He wanted to see his darling Henry. He took a deep breath, trying to regain his composure. "Very well. I'll go check there now. See ya." 

…

Charles speed walked towards the airship's balcony. Why would Henry go there? Away from him? Why would Henry go somewhere where he wasn't by his side? He reached the door that led to the balcony outside. He walked through it. His eyes lit up at the sight before him. There was his priceless treasure, bathed in sunlight and surrounded by the endless sky and clouds around them. Quite frankly, his sweet little Henry was beautiful out here. Like an angel in heaven. Charles just had to gaze at the gorgeous sight before him.

      Henry kept his back towards Charles. Charles smiled as he approached Henry, then wrapped one of his arms around his waist, using his other arm to turn Henry's face towards him and kissed Henry on the lips before moving to kiss Henry's cheeks and neck. "Oh Henry~ my dear, what are you doing out here alone? It's dangerous here, I don't want you wandering too far from me. I'll keep you safe, love." Charles said in a sing-song voice, as he kissed Henry's neck. Charles buried his face into his neck, nipping at the skin. "... Charles…" Henry whined, he had to talk to him, it was his only hope for improvement in their relationship. Henry knew Charles was not only taller than him, but he was much stronger than him as well. If Charles wanted to restrain Henry, he could. He wasn't sure if Charles would do it, but he knew he could. That knowledge scared him. "Hmm?" Charles hummed, just filled with happiness at the sound of Henry's voice. Charles inhaled deeply, taking in Henry's scent. "Charles, we need to talk. Can we go back to our room?" "Of course." Charles moved his arms to lift Henry, carrying him to their room.

… 

      Charles held Henry in his lap, the two of them on their bed. Henry could feel Charles kisses and breaths on the back of his neck. "Charles." Henry's voice was quiet, slightly distressed. "Yes my love?" Charles asked fondly. "I know you love me, and I love you too. Really, I do, but I need-" Henry was interrupted by Charles. "What do you need? I can provide it for you! Any treasures of the world are yours, just ask!"

 "I need space Charles! I love you and all, but it's driving me crazy that I can't have a few minutes to myself without you freaking out and shooting somebody or something!" Henry's eyes stung from the tears forming in them. He took in a small gasp of air before continuing. "I was hoping that when I joined your clan we'd be like partners in crime. Not me being your pet. I want to be alongside you, but still be an individual. Why can't you let me do that?" Henry started to sob. "You say you love me, but you don't seem to really care about how I feel! And it hurts, Charles. It really, really hurts. It makes me reconsider whether or not I still want to stay." Henry started crying. Tears ran down his face, and he trembled. There was silence between them. Charles gripped Henry slightly tighter. Had he really been hurting him without realizing it? Would Henry leave him? He didn't want him to leave! He needed Henry. Every time the two of them were apart, he craved Henry's presence. He yearned to hear Henry's voice. "Henry… I-I… I never meant to hurt you. I just… I don't want anyone or anything taking you away from me, but… I don't want to drive you away either. Please. Stay. I'll try to be better. I want to make you happy. Let me make you happy." Charles begged. He took a deep breath. "I'll try to respect your privacy, and give you more space."

Henry sniffled, then turned around to face Charles. "You really mean, it?" Charles used his thumb to wipe the tears off of Henry's face, then he nodded. "I mean it. I don't want to lose you. Just tell me how I can be better for you." Charles pleaded, he'd do anything for Henry. "Okay, well to start. I'd like to be able to talk to other people without you threatening to kill and/or maim them." Henry began, he wanted to be able to socialize again. "I'll try. But you're still mine." Charles said slightly sternly. "We'll work on that."

This was going to take time. Charles would have a hard time changing his behavior, but he'd do it if it meant Henry would stay. "Please don't leave." Charles pleaded again, burrowing his face into Henry's shoulder. "I won't. But here are other things that we need to change." Henry stated, he loved Charles. If Charles was willing to develop a healthier relationship, then he could truly be happy with Charles and the Toppats.

"I love you, Charlie. Even if you're crazy. Thank you for hearing me out." Henry leaned back into Charles, the act of affection making Charles smile. "I love you too. I'll try my best to make you happy, Hen-Hen." Charles kissed Henry on the cheek before moving to lay down, bringing Henry with him. The two of them cuddled together. Doing their best to communicate their feelings better. With enough time and effort, they'd develop a better relationship. One based more on love and less on obsession.

Yandere Toppat Charles Au

*Headcannons/Info!*

Rupert didn't really like Henry at first. He just saw him as some spoiled, pampered little snowflake who got all of Charles' positive attention while everyone else suffered from their chief's wrath. But after actually interacting with Henry one on one, he realized that Henry was actually under a lot of stress and was very lonely. He's warming up to him.

Henry needs a friend, he's got very little social interaction with people other than Charles.

After the events of "Stay" Charles is trying to be better. He's still a ways to go though.

Henry is underweight, Charles is doing his best to encourage Henry to eat better/more

Henry loves cheese

Rupert and Henry slowly become friends

Dave is friendly towards Henry, he wants to be friends but Charles scares him. A lot.

Galeforce was the cheif before Charles, but he's no longer on the airship as he retired

I like this song, I thought of them.

LIVE MIKO REACTION❗❗

1st (and 2nd) Meeting (Yandere Toppat Charles prequel oneshot)

Yep! I finally wrote more Yandere Toppat Charles. A lot of people have been requesting this. So here it is! Below the cut.

*Prequel oneshot! Let's go!*

Charles observed his computer monitor, watching the museum with the clan's hidden cameras they planted.

"Incredible.." He whispered in awe. The whole museum has fallen into chaos, and it was all thanks to one man. Henry Stickmin.

Yes, he'd been watching Henry for a while, seeing him make a name for himself. Charles wondered sometimes if he really worked alone. He had the skills of a whole task force, but always appeared to have no help. 

Did he plan these things? Or did Henry just make it up as he went along? He couldn't tell.

Oh Henry, so wild, so random. Yet so… impressive.

He had to meet this man. No doubt about it.

…

Henry ran with the diamond, he hid it in one of his hideouts outside the city. He'd have to lay low for a while, but it was worth it.

…

Henry left his hideout to retrieve some necessities, like food. He didn't plan on being out long, but he had a.. Strange encounter, on his way back.

Henry nabbed some fruit that he could stash and was in the process of running back to his hideout, it was night out and he used a lot of confusing alleyways and narrow roads to exit the city. Despite his efforts to avoid detection, someone apparently spotted him. 

"Henry Stickmin, or is it Stickman?" Henry whipped around and pointed his gun (which only had two bullets) at the voice, only to find no one standing there. Suddenly, he felt another body behind him. The stranger wrapped their arms around him, but in a way that felt more… gentle, friendly even. But the fact it was a stranger didn't help the fact that it was still terrifying. A hand quickly found itself grabbing his wrist, making him unable to fire it behind him. 

He felt someone's face right next to his own, they started whispering into his 'ear', "Hey, hey, calm down. I'm not here to cause you any harm. It's the opposite, really." The tone of the man's voice was strange. It was soft, but in a weirdly personal way. Like they knew each other or something. Which they did not. Or at the very least, Henry didn't.

"You broke yourself out of prison, stole the Tunisian Diamond, and even managed to avoid being recaptured… yet you struggle to even find a steady source of food… How sad. You deserve better, Henry.." The man somehow got even closer, Henry could feel his lips brush the side of his head, "... Way better." The stranger whispered, his tone changing a bit. 

Was this guy… flirting, with him?

"My name's Charles. I've seen your work from afar and I just gotta say, I'm impressed."

"Are you a cop or something? Because I'm pretty sure everything you're doing right now is illegal."

Charles laughed. "Good thing I'm not a cop then, huh?" Henry wasn't sure if that made it better or worse. 

"I'm a criminal. Just like you. The main difference is that I am a crime leader..."

 What was this guy? A mobster? Gang leader? When would he get to the point and stop all this weirdly intimate physical contact!?

" … and I think you should join me.."

Henry froze. This guy wanted him? A random solo thief, to join whatever crime syndicate he was in?

"I'll give you time to think about it. C'ya round, Henry." 

Just like that, Charles was gone. Henry only caught a glimpse of a red cloak and what was either headphones or ear muffs. He didn't get a long enough look to tell.

What a strange guy.

…

Henry woke up abruptly as he was practically thrown into a wooden crate. "Oh, I see you are awake at last." A man with a rather poised voice caught his attention. He saw a somewhat dapper looking man, with a brown mustache that he was twirling a bit as he talked.

Wait, was that a government uniform?

 "My my, no need to be so alarmed. We brought you here for a reason. We need your help." The man attempted to soothe Henry's anxiety. "My name is Reginald, and this is my right hand man," The man, now known as 'Reginald' gestured to another man who appeared to be driving the helicopter they all sat in. The second guy was taller than Reginald, Henry could tell, even though he was sitting down, and had a red mustache and hair. He appeared to be quite stern. And it was at this moment that Henry fully realized the situation.

He was in a government helicopter, with a couple soldiers holding guns at the ready, talking to someone who appeared to be in charge (maybe a captain). 

"You were a tricky little minx to catch, but I am sure your skills will make this worth the trouble."

Henry was briefed on the mission: go into the Toppat Clan's airship, find incriminating evidence, and gain his freedom. Seems fair enough.

Once he was on the ship, he found an air vent that eventually spat him onto a platform, one that was across from another platform with a "records" sign. 

"Oi, Henry. Might want to take a look at their records. You could probably find something there." Right's voice called through Henry's earpiece. His tone made it sound more like a command than a suggestion. "I've some things that can help you get across. What do you want to use?"

-Box

-Gun

-Right Hand Man

Henry decided on the box. Sure enough, one was dropped down in front of him. When he tried to open it, he realized it was made of metal. Suddenly, it seemed to unfold itself, sprouting arms and legs.

Ah. It was a small robot.

Suddenly, the small robot stomped up to him and lifted him off the ground with a vice grip. Henry had no time to get his bearings… and no time to prepare for the robot throwing him across the gap full-speed. 

Henry's body slammed into the metal floor, knocking the air out of his lungs. He looked across the gap, where he used to be, to see the robot give him a salute and then fold back into a box. Little pest. Useful, but still a pest.

Henry carried on his way to the records room, the shelves and files were practically endless, then he saw someone reading through a file. He ducked behind a shelf and watched the man. He had black sideburns, and a dark green uniform and Top hat to match. "Hmm. I gotta find a better spot for this, too incriminating to have in the open." He had a slight Brooklyn accent, if Henry assumed correctly.

Henry started to panic when the man stood up, seemingly turning to face the direction Henry happened to be in. 'Do something do something do something!' Henry's brain screamed.

Without thinking Henry grabbed a heavy book off the shelf and threw it full force at the guy. The book landed hard on the guy's foot, Henry could hear a *crack* upon impact. 

The Toppat crumbled to the floor, clutching his ankle and yelling obscenities for the whole world to hear. After some cursing, he seemed to refocus. "Who the FUCK-! Bukowski! Is that you!? I swear to god if that was you I'm gonna throw you off this Damn ship!" 

Henry crawled and sneaked his way around him, arms and legs on the metal floor. He maneuvered his way under the table, hastily grabbing the files the angry man dropped. He began to back up, hoping to leave the room without getting caught.

His hopes were dashed though when the guy turned his head to look at him. They both froze for a second when they made eye contact.

It did not take long for the Toppat to realize who was responsible for crushing his foot with a book. "Oi! Who the hell are you!?" Henry fumbled to his feet, and just ran. He was met with a locked door. Keycard only, Damn.

Henry turned to look at the man who was now getting up with the help of the table. That guy probably had a keycard.

Henry stuffed the file into his jacket, and bolted towards the guy. Using his built up momentum, he delivered a brutal kick to the guy's head, causing it to slam into the table top. While he was stunned, Henry snatched the card, and booked it towards the door. The identification on the card read "Rupert Price". 

Welp. Sorry Rupert, but he needed an escape. 

With his newfound access, he ran through the long metal halls of the ship. He had Right giving him directions to the nearest exit through his earpiece. It certainly helped with navigating the long, confusing, symmetrical halls of the airship.

Alarms started blaring. That Rupert guy must've alerted the clan.

Thinking fast, Henry swiftly dove into a vent, out of sight. He continued to listen to Right's directions.

"Take a left, don't make too much noise. There's a room full of crooks under you. A lot of 'em are armed."

Henry resisted the urge to say "no shit", feeling that it's pretty obvious a bunch of criminals would have weapons. He bit back his smartass remarks, it wasn't the time.

Henry eventually left the confines of the ventilation system, arriving in a room similar to a garage. Seeing as he was alone, he opened the huge metal garage door, ready to leave.

"Alright 'Enry. Get ready to-" the audio was cut off by garbled electronic noises. He couldn't make out what Right was saying, no matter how much he strained to listen. 

Suddenly, he heard someone… clapping?

"Finally, I can speak to you without interruptions," a voice said. A familiar one. Where had Henry heard that voice before?

"I gotta say, I haven't been this excited in a long time. Seeing you, Henry Stickmin, on my airship." 

A figure emerged from the darkness, a black hat with a red band and matching red headphones poking through, and a familiar red cloak.

The same guy from the alleyway! What was his name again? Henry's mind drew a blank, only remembering how weird that encounter was.

"I guess this is a good time to 'properly' introduce myself." The man said, a sly grin on his face. 

He approached Henry and gently grasped his hand, leaning down to plant a gentle kiss on his knuckles. 

"Charles Calvin, leader of the Toppat Clan."

Henry's face flushed a new shade of pink. He froze, muscles tense from intimidation, confusion, and slight flusherment. 

"I'm honored that you stopped by. It's a little unfortunate though. You are a talented thief, I didn't even know you were here at first!" Charles' tone took on a genuine excitement in that moment.

 "Though your 'government buddies' aren't quite as sneaky with that helicopter out there." His tone shifted again, laced with a feeling Henry could only describe as animosity when he mentioned the government.

 Henry swallowed thickly. He had been caught. What was Charles going to do? What would the government do with Henry's failure? 

"You're sweating," Charles said, seeming a bit concerned. He cupped Henry's cheek, gently caressing it with his thumb. Henry wasn't sure what to feel about this. For some reason, Charles seemed comforting and terrifying simultaneously. "What do they have on you Henry? I can't imagine that a habitual thief like yourself would willingly team up with the people hunting him down. Did they threaten you?"

Charles' voice had a protective edge to it.

Henry was at a loss for words. What was he supposed to do? 

On one hand, he barely knew this man, and the guy was a powerful clan leader. 

On the other hand, there was no guarantee that Captain Reginald would keep his promise. The government could be lying to him. They could have just wanted to use him to take down the clan, and then arrest him right after. Kill two birds with one stone.

Henry bit back his nerves, deciding to be honest and see how Charles would react. 

"My freedom." Henry stated, doing his best to make his tone unreadable. 

Charles tilted his head. "Your freedom? What, you do what they want and you don't get sent to prison? Is that really the deal?" 

Henry nodded. "They said they'd pardon me for my crimes."

"... And how do you know that they'll actually go through with it?"

Henry said nothing. He didn't know.

"Doesn't sound like you're any closer to freedom, bud." Charles' sympathetic tone made Henry feel… oddly safe. He wasn't sure why.

Charles cupped Henry's cheek, an oddly intimate and comforting action. "Join the clan Henry. No government, or prison, will even touch you, not if I have a say in it. You'll be safe with me, Henry, I promise. Just let me love you, and stay." 

Henry's eyes widened.

Wow… that was really forward of Charles. "Love" was an interesting word choice. Charles wasn't just asking Henry to join his criminal organization, he basically just asked him out. 

Henry's face lit up with a warm pink glow, before he thought about the reality of the situation. He had a choice to make. Both options had risks. He could either join Charles, or finish his government mission. A crime Lord stranger, or a US captain who had already kidnapped him earlier to get him to do the government's bidding. 

Henry averted his eyes, focusing them on the metal floor beneath them.

This place seemed stable. And the government hasn't taken these guys down. They were strong. If he stayed on their good side, he could be untouchable.

If he went with the government, he could be pardoned for his crimes and have a second chance at a normal life. No criminal record.

Henry closes his eyes.

-Stay

-Go

He looked Charles in the eye. The man patiently waited for his response with a smile. He was bouncing on his heels a bit. He seemed eager. 

Henry held out his hand, "Okay, I'll join you." He was expecting Charles to shake his hand, but instead, Charles threw his arms around Henry in a hug. He lifted Henry off the ground and spun around. 

"Oh Henry! I'm so glad! You won't regret this!" 

Henry squirmed awkwardly. This guy was very cuddly. 

Charles seemed to recompose himself. Henry was relieved when he could feel the floor beneath him again. 

Charles cleared his throat. "Ahem. So, how do you want to deal with… them?" Charles vaguely gestured to the helicopter outside. Henry was thankful they couldn't see him and Charles.

Henry tapped his chin in thought. Then an idea came to him.

"Do you have a spare hat?"

The cargo hold's door opened. The wind and air whipped around Henry violently, he had to squint. Henry held up the decoy he put together, making sure Charles's signature hat and headset stayed on its head. 

Charles waited off to the side, his back pressed against the wall by the door, nodding at Henry.

Suddenly, he could hear Right's voice in his earpiece again.

"Henry! What happened there!? I couldn't reach you."

"It's fine! I just had to turn off my earpiece for a bit. I didn't want to give away my location."

Henry stepped forward, making sure he could be seen from the helicopter, he put handcuffs on the decoy, and held it so that it looked like he arrested Charles. 

"I'll meet you on the ground!" Henry yelled, and turned off his earpiece. He backed up towards Charles, who had a decoy of Henry ready with a parachute strapped to it. 

They quickly tied the decoy together, still making sure that it looked like Henry was holding Charles, they gave the fake Henry the earpiece. Finally, they worked together to throw the decoys off the ship. 

Charles held a remote in his palm, quietly counting to himself so he could time it right.

Henry watched as the helicopter flew downwards to follow their false counterparts. Charles pressed a button on his remote, and the decoys' parachute opened.

They closed the cargo door, and smiled at each other. That should hold them off for a bit.

Charles started laughing. "Oh, I wish I could see their faces when they realize what we did." He wiped a tear from his eye.

Henry chuckled a bit. "I bet it would be funny."

Charles wrapped an arm around Henry. "Hahah… I hope we have a lot more moments like these, Henry." 

Henry smiled softly. "Yeah, me too."

Suddenly, Henry remembered something. 

"Oh! Uh… since we're working together now, I should probably give this back to you." He reached into his coat and pulled out the file he had stolen earlier. 

He handed it to Charles, who upon seeing it, let out another laugh. 

"Oh, you little minx! I didn't even realize you stole this!" Charles seemed genuinely impressed. "You're good.." He said, his tone ever so slightly flirtatious. 

Henry gave a dismissive (and bashful) hand wave. "It was nothing." 

"You're trouble, aren't you?" Charles smirked.

Henry chuckled. "Yeah, and now you have to deal with it."

"Gladly."

Medic, Maverick, Maniac, Murderer: Understanding Pharma

First thing’s first: I love Pharma, dearly.

In all the time I’ve spent evaluating his character, I’ve mainly focused on what can be worked out about who he is as an individual: his core sense of self, psychological drives, subjective worldview, etc.

When all else is stripped away, who is Pharma?

This treatise is the product of obsessing over Pharma, analyzing canon (and extras), and reading as many different perspectives on his character from fans across the fandom. The post is long, so for those of you who balk at the thought of reading a shortfic’s worth of Pharma thoughts, feel free to read the TL;DR (Conclusion) at the end and then decide if the full read is worth your time. Also, a premium reading experience is available in the form of the original Google Doc version.

As you read, keep in mind that this is primarily a mix of psychoanalysis, evidence-based examination, and speculation—not moral, ethical, or sociological commentary. The goal is to examine Pharma’s psychological drives and core values, and each of his appearances in the context of those. All other types of evaluation are up to readers.

Now, take your victim blaming-allergy meds (just in case); remove your black-and-white thinking caps; and leave your personal morality lenses at the door.

Psychological Drives & Core Values

Why does Pharma act the way he does? What gives him a reason to keep living? What are his personal priorities?

At the beginning of the Delphi arc, First Aid establishes Pharma as a “control freak” and someone who “thinks he’s an expert on everything.”

Now, First Aid has a habit of complaining about his bosses, but on both points, there’s canon evidence to back them both.

Expertise and Intellect

Throughout the Delphi and Luna 1 arcs, it’s established that Pharma is a skilled and brilliant doctor.

He once performed a 4-way fuel pump transplant, donating his own fuel pump in the process. (see above panel)

Later, he invented a soundbomb that left an echo laced with a virus and invented an antidote to that virus:

And on Luna 1, he was on the edge of finding a cure for Cybercrosis, based on the fact that Swerve was able to formulate a cure from his notes.

More than being a doctor, Pharma lives for intellectual and scientific achievement as a physician scientist. He feels most alive when he’s able to solve complex medical problems, and when his achievements are recognized by those whose opinion he considers important.

This is Pharma’s 'why.'

And even though he’s arrogant and enjoys praise, it’s not his primary motivation. He doesn’t need it in order to set his mind to whatever he’s interested in, although he’ll seek it from those he values most (i.e. Ratchet).

Pharma sees himself as less of a doctor, and more as a scientific innovator or medical maverick. The practice of medicine is primarily a catalyst for his creativity and intellect; it’s not an end in and of itself like it is for someone like Ratchet or First Aid.

First Aid’s observation of Pharma can be better phrased as, “[Pharma] thinks he’s an expert on everything medical”—because he’s not so driven by achievement and admiration that he’ll grovel at the feet of strangers and get good at something he doesn’t personally find interesting. The only time we see him express a desire for praise is when he’s around Ratchet—someone he holds in high regard for both personal and professional reasons. This makes sense since Ratchet is one of the only people who can give Pharma any kind of competition within what he considers to be his area of expertise.

“Each day we go to our work in the hope of discovering—in the hope that some one, no matter who, may find a solution of one of the pending great problems—and each succeeding day we return to our task with renewed ardor; and even if we are unsuccessful, our work has not been in vain, for in these strivings, in these efforts, we have found hours of untold pleasure, and we have directed our energies to the benefit of mankind.” —Nikola Tesla

Ego

Without question, Pharma has an inflated ego, but having an inflated sense of self doesn’t automatically mean a person is a full-blown narcissist or that they are totally uncaring.

Every personality trait exists on a spectrum. Yes, Pharma is arrogant, but the presence of arrogance doesn’t automatically and completely cancel out all “positive” traits. (For fun, check out studies on Dark Tetrad and Light Triad personality traits.)

People are complex. Arrogance can coexist with genuine kindness, ruthlessness can coexist with deep compassion, etc.

Whether Pharma exhibits genuine kindness is up to each reader’s interpretation of what little canon material exists, but the point is: Pharma’s arrogance doesn’t automatically rule out the possibility of authentic “positive” traits.

Controlling Tendencies

Pharma is comfortable pulling the power card and using it to dump what he sees as uninteresting parts of medical practice on those below him:

“So Fisitron’s writing about the Wreckers’ elbows now, is he?” said Delphi’s Chief Medical Officer. “Come on, First Aid - get to it. You’ve got a Fader in Row 2 downstairs.” He squeezed the air with his finger and thumb. “He’s about this far from shutdown.” —from Bullets by James Roberts

However, there’s nothing in canon indicating he’s power-hungry in a megalomaniacal sense. He’s not Starscream or Megatron; he doesn’t seek political or social power. In fact, he seems perfectly happy hiding away in a lab or medibay by himself so he can direct all his energy to solving issues and achieving the so-called ‘impossible’ within the field of medicine:

The ways in which Pharma exercises power and control are through his expertise, and his administrative/management skills. That’s it.

Self-confidence

Pharma’s arrogance and controlling tendencies don’t seem to be a mask—like he’s trying to compensate for some sense of lack (in those areas). Yes, he fears failure, and yes, he displays some insecurity when Ratchet questions his competence. But at every other point and in every other way, Pharma is unapologetically self-confident. He’s fully self-assured of his intellectual prowess and problem-solving capabilities; he knows what he knows, and he also knows what he doesn’t know.

Pharma’s arrogance and desire for control don’t stem from a hidden lack of confidence or a hunger for power on its own. They stem from the fact that he genuinely sees himself as the best person for the work he does. He trusts himself above anyone else to solve problems that come his way—medical or otherwise (within limits).

Elitism vs. Superiority

I’ve always read Pharma as having an elitist attitude, but not in the social stratification sense:

elitist (adj.) relating to or supporting the view that a society or system should be led by an elite.

There’s no evidence that Pharma believes an elite class of people should hold the most power. Instead, Pharma’s “elitism” is actually an individualistic sense of superiority. It’s centered on him alone, and is tied to his capabilities as a physician scientist and surgeon.

Pharma sees himself as the best of the best and makes sure everyone knows it—sometimes through his words, but mostly by his conduct in the field of medicine. This, paired with Pharma’s natural temperament, doesn’t exactly make him socially popular—inside or outside of medicine:

One could argue that the “personality” Lockdown is referring to was a result of all Pharma had suffered at Delphi and Luna 1, but just as easily, one could argue he was always a bit difficult to get along with, and that his traumatic experiences merely magnified his already-present psychological patterns. Personally, I like the latter interpretation because it’s a flaw that makes Pharma a more interesting character no matter his mental state.

Everyone reacts differently to real and perceived social rejection. Some are so concerned about it that they’ll try anything to belong; others genuinely don’t care, and they continue as usual; and still others cope by shifting their mindset and developing a sense of pride in being an outsider.

There’s no evidence for this in canon, but I believe it’s within reasonable characterization boundaries to headcanon Pharma as being in the second or third category.

With either of those two mindsets, a sense of superiority can develop, or even be an inciting factor. Either someone sees themselves as genuinely superior to the majority and doesn’t mind when this alienates them from people, or they convince themselves they’re superior because the pain of accepting they were rejected for who they are is too much to handle.

Whatever the case, the point is, having an “elitist” attitude isn’t necessarily rooted in a sociological or ideological belief. Sometimes, individuals just see something in themselves that—to them—justifies a sense of personal superiority. A quick glance at Pharma’s canon appearances makes it clear he holds such a view of himself, at least to some degree.

Morality and Compassion

When Pharma first shows up in canon, he’s working at the New Institute. A lot of questionable things took place there on a regular basis—things Pharma would have been aware of, to some degree. However, his presence at the Institute doesn’t automatically mean he agreed with everything happening. Depending on how strongly someone feels about something, some people are content to disagree in silence. Not everyone who seeks employment considers it a priority that the establishment they work for aligns perfectly with their moral values. After all, there are other reasons to take a job: financial benefits, exclusive educational and career opportunities, pure convenience, etc.

I’m not here to say either way whether Pharma’s willingness to turn a blind eye to the events at the New Institute was wrong or right; that’s up to each reader to decide for themselves. However, Pharma’s choice to remain employed at the Institute for some time can say something about him as a character: his priority as a doctor and person is not to take care of everyone he encounters, or to act as some kind of moral or ethical authority.

This isn’t to say Pharma won’t ever stand up for something he regards as right or push back against something he sees as wrong, “off screen.” It’s just that everything in canon points more to a tendency to choose his battles instead of acting immediately on any moral sense the way someone like Optimus or Ratchet might.

This also isn’t to say Pharma doesn’t care about saving lives, but from what little is shown of him before Delphi, it’s hard to say how much he cared. Ratchet confirms later that Pharma was an excellent doctor for most of his life, but all that tells us is he was an excellent doctor; it says nothing about his internal attitude toward his work or patients.

However, inferences can be made based on doctors in our own world:

Being a doctor—especially one in trauma care—is far from easy. It takes a lot out of a person, and there are very few people who last in the profession for a long time. Most medical professionals fall into one of the following categories:

People possessing a strong will that’s coupled with an unwavering passion for taking care of others (the public’s favorite)

People who naturally have, or develop, an ability to switch their empathy off and on at will, or build walls around it—also possessing a strong will (the ideal)

People who naturally have a limited capacity for empathy (the one the public hates to acknowledge)

People with a strong social and professional support system (the necessary, but underutilized and underappreciated factor)

Of course, even if a person has one or more of the above, burnout can and does still happen, but individuals who have at least one have the best chances of surviving and thriving amidst the demands of the majority of medical professions.

As far as is shown in canon, Pharma never had a strong support system—either circumstantially or by choice—so something else was keeping him in medicine.

Pharma shows concern for both Tumbler (Chromedome) and Hubcap:

But even though he obviously cared enough to step in, neither instance makes a strong case for a capacity for empathy beyond the “average” or “norm.” Performing a job well is a lot different from being personally invested in the work.

Based on everything up to this point, and this later comment from Pharma, about Ratchet…

…Pharma has probably never shared the same I-care-about-everything-and-everyone view of the world. Instead, it’s more likely that Pharma holds a more rational view of his work and patients.

One of the first things learned in medicine, especially in trauma medicine, is that you can’t help or save everyone, and to hold yourself to that standard can destroy you quickly if you have a certain temperament or lack healthy boundaries for your empathy.

“There are times when it may seem as though I view sick or injured people not as living, breathing humans with feelings and emotions and people who love them, but simply as cases, as problems to be solved. And that is absolutely true. It's not that I don't have empathy, but the hard fact is that as a doctor, and especially as a trauma surgeon, too much empathy can get in the way of your job and cause you to make decisions based not on sound medical judgment but on your own emotions. Sure, I've seen things that even years later can still make me choke up when I think of them: a little girl shot and killed, a shattered young Marine who shouldn't have died but did. But you can't choke up in the ER or the operating room. To be effective as a trauma surgeon, you have to put a layer of Kevlar around your heart.” —Dr. Peter Rhee, Trauma Red: The Making of a Surgeon in War and in America’s Cities*

Pharma may have learned this difficult truth earlier than Ratchet and developed a practical way of managing his empathy that comes across as “cold.” He may have always had an ability to put up walls around his spark. Or, he may have always had little to no capacity for empathy.

The fact that the morality lock on Tyrest’s portal prevented Pharma from passing through proves he felt guilty for what he’d done, and JRO confirmed this. Therefore, it’s safe to assume Pharma had some level of empathy for his former patients, suffering moral injury when he felt he had no other option but to start killing them.

Still, looking at Pharma’s psychological drives and his behavior throughout canon, it’s clear compassionate care and morality are subordinate to his other values and interests.

*I highly recommend this book, and learning about Dr. Rhee in general. He’s a huge inspiration of mine, and one of my main sources of inspiration when writing Pharma. Level-headed and capable, strong-willed, selectively empathetic, an excellent scientist, etc. He lives for the thrill of practicing medicine both on the floor and as an expert in his field who pushes trauma medicine to new heights through his research. He also takes great pride in his hands. Seriously—the man spent an entire paragraph and a half talking about his “good hands” and how they were one of two reasons he decided to go into trauma surgery. The other reason was that he “liked action and excitement, liked the feeling of being able to walk into a tough situation and take control.” (Sounds familiar…)

Delphi

First thing’s first: we don’t know how much Pharma did or didn’t know about the DJD before agreeing to take the Delphi assignment.

That far into the war, he would have known something about the DJD and their ways of terrorizing traitors and Autobots, but for whatever reason, he took the assignment anyway. Perhaps Prowl assured him the situation on Messatine would be monitored and that the security team would be enough. Perhaps he underestimated the DJD’s capabilities, or scale of territory, and thought he would be able to handle things on his own. Perhaps Prowl gave him no choice. Maybe it was all of these and more.

Whatever the case, according to JRO, Pharma didn’t hate Delphi before the incident with the DJD.

Word of god remains a touchy subject in fandom, but in this case, it’s important because it says two things:

The DJD left the Delphi medical team alone for some time.

Being on the edges of DJD territory didn’t automatically mean isolation and harassment by their hand.

On the second point, First Aid was free to come and go from Messatine as he pleased, seeing as he attended a medical conference at Kimia five years into his assignment at Delphi:

Five years ago [mid-Delphi assignment], the leader of the Wreckers had cornered him at a medical conference at Kimia, the space station that doubled as a weapons research facility. —from Bullets

And five years after that, he was able to not only contact Springer without delay about one of Agent 113’s bullets he’d discovered in an Autobot badge…

He raced upstairs to his computer terminal and typed in a certain frequency code for the second time in his life. A face appeared on the screen and grinned. “It’s me,” said First Aid. “And you're never gonna guess what I’ve got for you..!”

…but he was also able to meet up with Springer to hand off the bullet:

“Your friend has a funny way of making contact,” First Aid had said when he’d got in touch three days earlier, and he was right.

It’s not known if this handoff happened on or off world, but either way, the DJD didn’t interfere.

At some point, Tarn set his sights on Pharma and the Delphi team. Knowing the DJD, one can only imagine what Tarn used to show off his team’s capabilities and convince Pharma the best option was to cooperate.

In striking a deal with Tarn to keep the DJD away from Delphi, Pharma established his territory and ensured his continued security and the safety of his staff. As long as Tarn got his T-cogs, Pharma could continue on in relative peace. He could work his magic on bots that ended up at Delphi, carry out his management duties, and work on whatever projects or research he may have been conducting in his free time.

For whatever reason, after he first came into contact with Tarn, Pharma didn’t call for help. Communications were still operational, as Pharma wouldn’t have suggested contacting High Command about the Duobots if the team was aware of any comm malfunctions:

Also, First Aid later confirms that communications were fine until the Big Bang (soundbomb detonation):

It’s always possible the DJD was monitoring the radio waves, but secure subspace frequencies exist, such as the Datalog Network First Aid used to send the datalog containing the death statistics:

Speaking of which, assuming First Aid sent the datalog with the statistics right when things started to get ‘weird,’ and before the Big Bang shut down comms, it only took—at most—a few days for them to reach Ratchet and Swerve on the Lost Light:

But back to Pharma not calling for help: for all of Prowl’s intel, contingency planning, and fretting over the security of Autobot territories, I find it hard to believe he would have stuck an Autobot medical team on the fringes of DJD territory without giving them some means of securely contacting the outside in case of issues.

But even if Prowl didn’t give Pharma a secure way to contact him or anyone else, and even if Pharma was convinced the DJD was monitoring regular communications, there were other ways he could have reached out for help. After all, the team wasn’t alone on Messatine. Like Pharma said, Prowl continued to send bots to defend the nucleon mines:

The Autobots had been mining nucleon for millions of years at this point, so I doubt the mined nucleon was just sitting in storage on Messatine; shipments of the stuff would have been sent off-world to wherever the Autobots needed it. Why not send a message for Prowl with someone leaving with one of those shipments? A message meant only to be sent over a call when absolutely certain they were out of range of the DJD’s potential monitoring.

Or, why not order in off-world medical supplies and send a message back with the delivery bot(s)?

There are two possible answers to this. One takes into account JRO’s word on the subject; the other is more intricate and speculative on my part, but it leads to the same place. So whatever your stance is on the validity of word of god, there’s an answer for you.

Answer one (word of god)

Simple as that. Pharma was aware of the scope of the DJD’s capabilities and relentlessness, and determined he was trapped prey.

Answer two (no word of god)

There are a few possible reasons Pharma didn’t call for help right away:

He was convinced all his other options would take too long and/or would still lead to him being put under suspicion. After all, being found to have harvested even a single T-cog from an already-dead patient for the DJD could have raised concerns that would lead to Pharma being investigated and/or having a mark put on his record.

He underestimated the severity of Tarn’s addiction, and was certain he could keep up with the T-cog demand without resorting to other means of harvesting, not realizing Tarn’s quota would increase later on.

He was already paranoid as a result of whatever mind games Tarn had set in motion at their first meeting, making Pharma think escape was futile.

Word of god or no word of god, there are clear reasons as to why Pharma ended up trapped. Most likely, it was a mix of all of the above.

Whatever was going on in Pharma’s mind before, he ended up in deeper trouble. Tarn increased his demand for T-cogs, and Pharma couldn’t keep up. By the time this happened, even if he had wanted to call for help, it was too late to do so without implicating himself. He reasoned his only option was to start killing patients to harvest their T-cogs.

Soon, Pharma was so consumed with fretting over whether he’d be able to meet Tarn’s next demand that he didn’t have time or freedom to do anything else except worry and feel guilty. His whole life revolved around Tarn’s addiction; he was no longer in control, and could no longer enjoy whatever it was about Delphi he’d previously enjoyed. Perhaps the facility itself enabled Pharma to research cures and perform scientific miracles of medicine.

Being at the mercy of Tarn—convinced the DJD would find him no matter what—would have been pure psychological torture on its own, but also knowing that any small chance he did have of getting help would end in him losing everything would have added to his suffering. Pharma became desperate to reclaim control over his life and began planning an escape.

Now, JRO has said that Pharma didn’t originally plan to use the rust plague on the DJD…but canon says otherwise:

Of course, Pharma could have been lying to make himself look better in Ratchet’s view, but based on everything he’d been through up to this point with Tarn, it’s more likely he was telling the truth and had tried to eliminate the source of his suffering first. After all, wiping out the DJD would have been the simpler, cleaner option.

When the Duobots refused to detonate the soundbomb near the DJD, Pharma’s objectives shifted. He had to get Delphi shut down in a way that would:

Convince the DJD the shutdown was legitimate.

Pharma knew chances of escaping the DJD at all were slim to none, but he was desperate. Getting Delphi shut down would cut off Tarn’s supply of T-cogs and allow Pharma to escape Tarn’s immediate control, but the shutdown had to be “legitimate” to prevent Tarn from retaliating and hunting him down later. Leaving Tarn even the slightest chance of regaining control was too risky, so Pharma had to make sure his plan was as airtight as possible. 

Cover up the patient murders.

If the truth got out about Pharma killing patients, he’d lose his medical license and most likely be put away for life. Being cut off from the practice of medicine and his intellectually stimulating work as a doctor would mean losing more than a job and a reputation. It would mean losing everything in which he’d anchored his sense of identity and life’s meaning. His refusal to consider any other options wasn’t just about ego and preserving his image as an excellent doctor; it was about preserving any kind of meaningful future he saw for himself.

Pharma needed a plan that would fulfill all of the above. Turning the engineered virus on the medical facility was the most effective and efficient solution. Anything else would have made him suspicious in the view of either Autobot High Command or the DJD, and neither of those would have ended well for him.

Because of his goal to preserve his reputation and future in medicine, he couldn’t even risk revealing anything to First Aid or Ambulon, who would have seen to his ruin. They became nothing more than loose ends that had to be tied up, and based on the fact that Pharma only prepared one vial of the vaccine, his original plan involved him being the only survivor:

He probably would have had no problem making more of the vaccine for anyone else who survived, but he wasn’t counting on it. He wanted a totally clean slate; in letting his staff die with most of his patients, he would be getting rid of any and all evidence and reminders of his failures. He may have cared about First Aid and Ambulon before things got bad, but somewhere along the way, he decided either it wasn’t worth it to go through the trouble of finding a way to save them without raising suspicion, or he didn’t want to risk them putting together the pieces later on.

Of course, when Ratchet showed up, plans changed.

Ratchet

Ratchet is not the kind of person who seeks first to understand or be understanding. He’s inclined to trust what’s in front of him over anything abstract, and tends to look at the results of someone’s actions over trying to find any kind of ‘why’ behind them. Also, unlike Pharma, he operates from a strong moral sense, and reacts quickly and strongly when something or someone goes against that internal moral sense.

Ratchet’s reaction to finding out what Pharma did may seem hasty and harsh, but it makes perfect sense on a human level. There is no such thing as unconditional love; everyone has personal and moral lines (boundaries), and they’re different for each individual. When the most rigid of lines is crossed, that’s it; walls go up and the offender is cut off, no matter how strong the relationship may have been.

Ratchet obviously knew Pharma well enough to think he could try talking some sense into him, but then Pharma revealed that he’d crossed one of Ratchet’s lines: murdering patients. Any willingness Ratchet may have had to try to understand vanished. By the time Pharma started trying to provide a ‘why’ for his actions, Ratchet’s moral judgment had already shut down any chance of understanding what could have possibly led Pharma to kill patients. It didn’t help that Pharma seemed totally unapologetic and outright proud of his plan. For Ratchet, the ‘why’ didn’t matter anymore. What he saw was what he trusted, and what he saw was a friend who’d become his idea of a monster.

Now, Ratchet and Pharma’s relationship is one of the most confusing IDW relationships I’ve had the pleasure and pain of dissecting.

It is notoriously difficult to determine the depth and strength of a relationship from the outside. However, I’ve decided to go ahead and address it anyway because it has the potential to provide insight into Pharma as an individual.

If I were to sum up Pharma and Ratchet’s relationship in a single word, I would use “ambivalent.” The first time I read MTMTE, the thing that stood out to me most about their relationship was the drastic differences between how they each perceived the relationship.

In one sense, there’s the idea of Pharma basically being Ratchet’s crazy stalker ex, which is tossed around in fandom a lot. While I personally dislike seeing it regardless of context (yes, even as a joke), I do see how JRO’s writing choices set things up in a way that makes it easy to superimpose that trope.

In another sense, there’s the idea that Pharma and Ratchet were always close friends, and that what happened at the end of the Delphi story was a betrayal of both sides that came out of nowhere and whose consequences were taken too far.

I disagree with both. Personally, what I see at the end of the Delphi story isn’t an obsessed ex gone mad, a sudden betrayal, or a badly executed backstabbing. What I see is a breakdown of an already-complicated and poorly-maintained relationship: true feelings being revealed, long-repressed bitterness being forced to the surface, carefully-hidden cracks being split wide open.

Most people don’t have an accurate understanding of how much or how little they truly know the people in their lives, often overestimating how well they know a person until something surfaces and blindsides them.

According to JRO, Ratchet was oblivious to Pharma’s romantic interest, and throughout canon, it’s easy to see Pharma was more invested in the relationship than Ratchet ever was.

The question is, did Ratchet ever care about Pharma at all? And if so, to what degree?

Yes, Ratchet calls Pharma “buddy” and “friend,” but the former was sarcastic, and the latter means something different to each person. Also, in light of the circumstances, Ratchet could have just been saying “friend” in response to Pharma saying it—an emotional appeal more than anything.

However, Pharma must have been aware of Ratchet’s lack of relational investment because during the confrontation at Delphi, Pharma’s first reaction wasn’t to appeal to their friendship (ex: “But you know me!”). Instead, he appealed to their shared profession:

Then there’s the exchange of insults: 

This is what I meant earlier by “true feelings being revealed.” Ratchet may have just been trying to match Pharma’s insult, but it’s unlikely it was merely reciprocal because while Ratchet is snarky at times, he’s sincere in that snark. There’s almost always some truth in his verbal jabs no matter how unserious they seem, and he’s never cruel for cruelty’s sake.

So, if Pharma saw Ratchet as an inferior doctor, and Ratchet saw Pharma as an inferior Autobot…it’s reasonable to assume there was always some deep-rooted competition and conflict preventing them from being super close.

Possible suspicion surrounding Pharma’s conduct as an Autobot paired with a tendency to misjudge the nuances of relationships could explain why Ratchet was so quick to decide Pharma was a lost cause. Maybe Pharma’s actions at Delphi confirmed something from the past that Ratchet had brushed off for whatever reason.

In any case, Ratchet seems to have been largely unaffected by the Pharma he found at Delphi. While leaving Messatine, he emphasizes that he’ll miss Pharma’s talent.

Not “who he used to be.”

Not “what we used to have.”

Just…“his talent.”

Later, on Luna 1, Pharma mentions that he and Ratchet were inseparable, but that could mean a few different things:

Best case scenario: Pharma and Ratchet sought each other out on equal terms.

Worst case scenario: Pharma followed Ratchet around.

Somewhere in the middle: the job forced Pharma and Ratchet to work in close proximity most of the time, and while Pharma intentionally ran into Ratchet more often than necessary, Ratchet also sought out Pharma every now and then.

Whatever the case, working with someone every day doesn’t tell you anything about who they are as a person, and the amount of time spent with someone doesn’t automatically correlate to how deep the relationship is or how well the people know each other. It’s not like either Pharma or Ratchet are shown to be good at expressing their personal feelings outside of extreme circumstances. 

Ratchet does bring up late-night conversations of the past:

But while this indicates there was something deeper between him and Pharma, because neither of them were ever shown to be super open with their true feelings, it’s unlikely the conversations were full of touchy-feely talk. In all likelihood, the conversations were mostly medicine and war-related, with the rare spark-to-spark talk sprinkled in. Also, considering everything up to this point, one has to wonder if those talks ever meant anything to Ratchet, or if he was just digging for something that might stall Pharma’s torture.

Maybe those late-night conversations did mean something to Ratchet, but whatever the case, Pharma didn’t take the bait. He knew Ratchet was trying to stall by making an emotional appeal, and perhaps he was convinced the conversations hadn’t meant that much to Ratchet.

Looking at all of this, it’s hard to believe Ratchet ever cared about Pharma as more than an interesting work friend. But even if he had cared more than he let on, it wasn’t enough to overcome the doubts he had about Pharma’s character.

As for whether Pharma truly cared about Ratchet, I’m convinced he did, but in a mostly unhealthy way, and with a strong undercurrent of one-sided rivalry. At some point, Ratchet had been an equal and a source of challenge, and he probably listened to Pharma pretty often. It’s reasonable to assume Ratchet was one of the only people—if not the only person—able to handle Pharma’s intense temperament and challenge him in a meaningful way, providing some semblance of friendship for Pharma.

However, one last thing that stands out is that, when telling Ratchet why he’s torturing him, Pharma didn’t say anything like, “Because you hurt me” or “Because you turned against me—your friend.” Instead, he said it was for “ruining things at Delphi” and because “you declared war on my body.”

Either Pharma wasn’t being entirely honest, or Ratchet’s friendship didn’t mean as much in the first place as he’d previously implied. It’s possible the ‘Because you hurt me’ was implied in “for ruining things back at Delphi,” but why not say it outright? Perhaps it was a fear of vulnerability and admitting there was ever a relational need at all.

At the end of the day, it’s difficult to say for certain how close Pharma and Ratchet were, but it’s clear they were never on the same page and there were always barriers between them.

Luna 1

Revisiting the matter of Pharma’s morality taking a backseat to other priorities, his time on Luna 1 further underscores this. Again, Pharma chooses his battles and is unwilling to put himself at great risk for the sake of others, but a closer look at the situation with Tyrest reveals there wasn’t really anything he could have done for the Cold Construct population even if he had wanted to. It would have been him against Tyrest, an army of Legislators, and a bunch of Decepticons. Pharma knew his limits, and seeing as his goal was self-preservation, it was perfectly rational for him to go along with Tyrest’s grand scheme.

Besides, it doesn’t look like he was given much of a choice:

Although, knowing Pharma, he still would have demanded to know beforehand what he would get in return for the pain, and evidently, Tyrest held up his end of the deal since Pharma had access to the Luna 1 tech collection.

As for Tyrest’s plan to wipe out the Cold Construct population, there’s nothing indicating Pharma’s decision to turn a blind eye to it was rooted in malevolence or bigotry—just rational apathy: ‘I can’t stop Tyrest, so why concern myself with the outcome?’

Again, you can’t save everyone; Pharma had all he could do to save himself.

But it wasn’t all horrible. I would even go so far as to say Pharma found some happiness on Luna 1. Tyrest didn’t care about him, but he didn’t need Tyrest to care. Everyone else there hated him, but he didn’t need to feel like he belonged or was admired. At this point, Pharma’s only interest was Tyrest’s Luna 1 tech collection, and that meant playing nice so he could keep his reward. Back at Delphi, he probably assumed he’d never again practice medicine the way he’d loved; being brought to Luna 1 was an unexpected, yet welcome, second chance.

Even so, Pharma had his moments of cruelty. Back at Delphi, he had easily-identifiable reasons to kill patients—both the ones whose T-cogs he harvested and the 20 more he tried to kill when he shot the life support machine. But on Luna 1, he had no reason to be cruel, yet he chose to be. By this point, he’d mastered the ability to almost completely ignore or subdue his conscience.

In the case of Ratchet’s torment, one could argue Pharma only drew it out for retaliation purposes; it was personal for him.

As for cutting Ambulon in half, it was obviously meant to be as gruesome as possible, yet also quick. But personally, I don’t think it was about Ambulon; it was more about hurting Ratchet. Due to the fact that Ratchet’s identity is wrapped up in his compassion and his ability to be helpful as a doctor, one of the most effective acts of revenge would be to do something that makes him feel utterly helpless.

Also I wonder if, subconsciously or consciously, Pharma was attempting to recreate the sense of helplessness he felt back at Delphi under Tarn’s watch: “Do you see, Ratchet? Do you now understand how it feels to have control ripped out of your hands? To be totally helpless?”

Next, for some reason, Pharma was invested in the promised execution of Getaway and Skids:

He had no personal connection to either of them that would give him a reason to be interested, so maybe Tyrest told him he could perform the execution and/or have the corpses for medical experimentation. Either way, Pharma would have had a chance to use some of the tech in Tyrest’s tech collection, possibly explaining his excitement.

Of course, any chance of an execution disappeared when the final showdown went wrong.

When Pharma tried to escape to Cyberutopia and discovered he couldn’t pass through the spacebridge forcefield, he gave up. He’d been caught; he would no longer have access to Tyrest’s tech collection; Ratchet and every other self-righteous Autobot would never forgive him; and the morality lock prevented him from escaping. By all appearances, he would never again be able to engage in that which gave him a sense of meaning. He had shrunken his world down to his obsessive interest in a specialized field and one significant, yet unrequited relationship. With both of these lost, his world collapsed. 

Yes, guilt played a part in Pharma’s despondency, but because he seems to have been in denial of said guilt, it’s more likely his despair was primarily due to the fact that he saw no future for himself. He had nothing left to live for.

In light of this, Pharma’s flippant comments to First Aid make sense. He wasn’t being insensitive as much as he was goading First Aid. Pharma’s not stupid. First Aid had a massive rotary cannon on him, and Pharma knew exactly which emotional buttons to push to get him to pull the trigger.

Pharma wanted to die.

Adaptus

First, let me emphasize that Adaptus did not take possession of Pharma’s body. Instead, Pharma was the unwelcome guest:

How Pharma ended up in Adaptus’ new body is a mystery, but whatever the case, Pharma didn’t pass on to the Allspark. Whether or not he had a choice can only be speculated.

First Aid had blasted Pharma’s head clean off, so whatever happened must have been related to the spark. Perhaps some residual spark energy was trapped in a body part that Adaptus repurposed, leaving Pharma tethered to the new body unwillingly.

Still, Pharma managed to assert his will and override Adaptus for a brief moment. Considering Adaptus was basically a god, this is impressive.

Based on Adaptus’ surprise at being interrupted, it seems he didn’t know Pharma was there. Why Pharma hadn’t tried to assert himself sooner is a mystery. Maybe Adaptus’ scheme was entertaining; maybe Pharma actually liked the company; or maybe he’d been waiting for an opportunity to get revenge on Tyrest for everything done to him back at Luna 1.

Sure enough, just like with Ratchet back on Luna 1, Pharma’s vengeful streak came out as soon as there was an opportunity.

Unfortunately for him, this left him vulnerable, and Tyrest took advantage of the confusion:

Conclusion

When someone reduces their world to narrow personal interests and one or a few very special people, their grip tightens around what little they have. They often become obsessive and possessive of the few things that make them feel alive, and their view of the world becomes increasingly more subjective and detached from the outside world. Pharma seems to have fallen into this trap.

Even so, in the context of the circumstances, several of the decisions he made were rational—even if coldly so. Oftentimes, “extreme” rationality and self-preservation are villainized in fiction, and characters like Pharma who don’t automatically put themselves at great risk for anyone and everyone are villainized, or at least looked down on. Their choices are often regarded as less human, but rationality and self-preservation are just as human as compassion and self-sacrifice.

Ultimately, Pharma was trapped and pushed over the edge into “insanity” by Tarn’s cruelty, but his own choices made from a place of pride determined how he fell, and how far he fell. It was a perfect storm of Tarn’s mind games and Pharma’s intellectual arrogance, excessive self-confidence, obsessive nature, and stubborn grip on the kind of future he wanted for himself.

Pharma is yet another Icarus who flew too close to the sun and paid dearly for it, and while JRO/the narrative could have given this Icarus better wings, that doesn’t change the fact that he chose to fly so high.

***

Many thanks to anyone who made it to the end of this monster of a post.

-tosses a Rodimus Star at you-