Nixieniade - Aces In Spades

Re-blogging so I never lose this post.

Exactly how drunk was Yuuri?

AT LEAST SIXTEEN GLASSES OF CHAMPAGNE 

THAT

IS A FUCK TON OF CHAMPAGNE 

The average bottle of champagne has about 7 glasses worth in it, which means that our boy Yuuri drank at least two full 750 ml bottles of champagne (x). Assuming he drank at least 1500 ml of champagne (12.2% alcohol volume), also assuming he is around 150 lbs, and that he was drinking for about 4 hours, his blood alcohol content percentage would come out to be .25%. (x)

.25%

If you don’t know what this number means, this zone of blood alcohol content is described:

“Drinkers are disoriented, confused, dizzy, and have exaggerated emotional states. Vision is disturbed, as is perception of color, form, motion, and dimensions.Drinkers have increased pain threshold and lack of muscular coordination. Drinkers stagger or lose the ability to walk and have slurred speech. Apathy and lethargy are typical.” (x)

And this is for the .18-.25% zone, which means I’m being conservative with my assumptions about his alcohol intake. Which means he should’ve been at least at the level of drunk stated above. 

So the real question is:

How in the hell was he able to not only participate but likely win two dance-offs in that kind of state?

TL:DR yuuri is a motherfucking monster

Victor: We're not gonna lose because we have everything we need to win right here. *points to chest*

Yuuri: *smiles* Heart.

Victor: No, me! I'm gonna win this for us. *strips off coat to reveal costume*

Announcer: And now, skating in place of his student, Victor Nikiforov!

LISTEN bitty and holster are like the dynamic duo for being dramatic and petty. Sometimes holster will dramatically slam bitty’s door open and fling himself practically into bitty’s lap and be like “you’ll never GUESS what I just heard William Poindexter say” and bitty will literally shove his textbook and homework off the bed and gasp and be like “TELL ME”. And then they literally just spend three hours bitching and gossiping

. . .

I just watched the first episode of Yuri on Ice. There are no gifs to explain how I’m feeling right now. Between this anime and Check Please! I’m going to die. I’m aboard the train, I hope everyone is happy now- my life is blissfully ruined!

This is brilliant! Ohmygods this is hilarious!

Me @ me: “Hey maybe don’t draw the entire first season of YOI from yakov feltsman’s perspective. That will take weeks and you’re an adult with a life”

…I did it.

Bonus:

Loosely based on this post.

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