Because Not Many People Are Talking About It, I'm Making A Post On What Constitutes Platonormativity!

Because not many people are talking about it, I'm making a post on what constitutes platonormativity!

Platonormativity here refers to the idealisation of friendship and viewing friendship as essential and mandatory.

Im putting this under the cut as this is a long post

[If this personally offends you or you're an exclus or think I am not aware of how friendship is also deprioritised, etc. honestly this post is not really for you lol]

Things that can be platonormative:

-Assuming that everyone has friends, and viewing it as a red flag or a sign of mental illness if someone doesn't have friends, and/or expecting them to be actively looking for friends

-Claiming that one must be 'friends first' before a romantic or sexual or other relationship in order for it to work out

-Treating friendship as inherently more stable and long-lasting than other relationship types

-Using the term friend for people without considering whether they actually are okay with that term or whether they actually want to be your friend, or otherwise considering someone your friend when they are not explicitly okay with that

-Claiming that aros and aces must "at least have friends" or experience platonic love or platonic attraction because of their 'lack'

-Claiming that everyone should have friends

-Profiling people who don't seem to have friends as a "suicide liability"

-Being ableist towards people whose ability to make or keep friends or want friends or otherwise engage in social bonds is diminished by their (physical or mental) disability and/or neurodivergence

-Assuming that everyone is alloplatonic and friending and plato-favorable

-Assuming that no one is monogamous for friendship

-Considering it inherently "unhealthy" or "increasing risk of abuse" if someone has a partner(s) but not friends

-Forcing friendship as something mandatory even when people are toddlers or very young children

-Assuming a couple/other partners are solely "friends" due to them being polyamorous, queer, or other reasons

-Assuming that people who interact in certain ways must be friends

-Treating friendship as something inherently more "wholesome" or as something that can never be used for harm unless it was a pretence

-Blaming a lack of friendship rather than the harmful behaviour itself when it comes to 'pickup artists' and other people who act entitled to sex, romance, or other things

-Calling aplatonics with a connection to romance "amatonormative" for existing

-Treating the dismantling of amatonormativity, relationship anarchy, and aro activism as an excuse to enforce friendship as something that is mandatory

-Claiming that 'aro culture' is basically (insert alloplatonic and/or plato favorable experience)

-Assuming that ALL demiromantic and/or demisexual people must require friendship as the bond after which it is a possibility for them to experience attraction

-Assuming that every alloaro must want a 'friends with benefits' type of relationship

-Assuming that anything thats nonromantic and/or nonsexual has to be platonic(friendship)

-Reinforcing a platonic-romantic binary

-Claiming that friendship cannot involve sex or romance ever

-Assuming that queerplatonic relationships are friendship or always involve friendship

-Looking down on others for not giving priority to friendship or not engaging in friendship

-Media being saturated with friendship and not many media existing without having friendship in it

-Not understanding that people can be repulsed by friendship and/or platonicism

anyone can have qprs! also never say that a qpr is less than a romantic relationship, that just shows how amatonormativity has eaten your brain

Allos can also have QPRs. Btw. In case you thought it was an aspec-only event. Or romance light. It's neither. And you can have one if you want.

happy lesbian visibility week to all lesbians ❤️🧡🤍🩷💜

Happy Lesbian Visibility Week to Aspec Lesbians!

Aromantic Lesbians Asexual Lesbians AroAce Lesbians AroAllo Lesbians AlloAce Lesbians

Aplatonic Lesbians Aqueerplatonic Lesbians Afamilial Lesbians Asensual Lesbians Analterous Lesbians Nonaesthetic Lesbians

Aspec Lesbians who never want to enter a romantic relationship Aspec Lesbians who never want to have sex Aspec Lesbians in relationships of any kind

Aspec Lesbians are fucking rad

my grandparents are older than isnotreal 💀

queer is better than lgbt+ because if you're in the + you're an afterthought, an etc., less important and valued to the community than anyone lgbt. queer however, queer works for us all, queer includes everyone

happy lesbian visibility day to ALL lesbians! ❤️🧡🤍🩷💜